#or if you all still enjoy stimboards even if they’re of pets other people have covered before?

[lps-heaven]

Informal poll, if anyone feels like answering: If you had to pick one, would you all prefer stimboards or moodboards be made as the default accompaniment for Featured Friends?

I feel like when I first made this blog, nobody was doing LPS stimboards, but now I’ve seen a few blogs crop up that do it, and I’m wondering if moodboards would be more unique and wanted nowdays as opposed to stimboards?

[stimmyvillainarchive]

Officially putting stimmyvillain on indefinite hiatus

so. this has been a long time coming.

I’ve been avoiding addressing these feelings cause I didn’t really wanna accept it or deal with it, but at this point I’ve reached my limit and I’m beyond fucking exhausted.

I don’t know if I’m going to be staying in the stim community anymore. I’m suspecting that my time here, while valuable for a good chunk, has become toxic and added to my misery that’s made me feel depressed and unable to do anything lately. It’s not just anons, though. This was honestly just the straw that broke the camel’s back. 

Up til now, and even then still now, I’ve taken pride in being a stim blog that wasn’t afraid to say it like it is and get into discourse if I felt there was wrongdoing going on. Then bullshit with my life happened, and I’ve completely relapsed into a deep depression that’s honestly worse than it’s ever been and now with losing my dog, I’m a wreck. I can handle it fine at some points but then I just completely lose it under the stress. 

And I’m coming to realize just... how pointless being so outspoken has become. I felt like people were listening to me and actually learning from what I had to say, then it turned into people just using me to get some form of entertainment from the fighting and drama. People are literally going to other blogs of mine to harass me about my dog’s death. I’m being harassed for losing a pet. This is actually incredibly shitty. And this isn’t the first time I’ve been harassed off this blog FOR my affiliation with this blog. I don’t feel my opinion is valued, nor my feelings.

But, I did enjoy my time here. Joining the community helped me actually come to accept that I’m an undiagnosed autistic that was going to be accepted for not knowing as soon as other people did. And I met one of my dearest friends through making this blog. So for that I’m putting it on hiatus so I can step away and clear my head. I’m going to be spending more time on deviantart again, which, ironically, I created this blog to get away from there. Maybe I’m just overall not a happy person and I wasn’t meant to be happy. But man, I have things I actually wanna do that, if I focused on, might bring me more fulfillment without the constant randos trying to upset me and get me to perform a show for them. How fucking weird that a blog catered to making gifs and stimboards has to deal with this nonsense.

So for the hiatus, I’m going to be spending some time away from it. I won’t delete it, though. I’m just not gonna pretend I’ll work up the nerve to post when I’m not ready. I’ll also be spending more time on my main blog and, hopefully, art and pride icon blogs. but I just wanna focus on my artwork and stories rn, they’re the only things that bring me any fulfillment and joy right now.

If I decide to come back, I may decide to move to a different blog and leave this as an archive. We’ll see, though. If I decide I’m done with stimmyvillain the blog will still be left for an archive so people can continue to use our content but either way, I’ll make a post about it. As said, idk how long the hiatus will be. I’m sorry to pull this so suddenly, but it’s been on my mind for a while, and I haven’t had it in me to post all that much anyway.

However, just to make my point clear because I want to see this community IMPROVE, here’s some key points about this blog and/or being in the stim community that has affected me negatively

- the RAMPANT exclusionism. Holy shit y’all will do anything for your aphobic faves and it’s literally painful to watch it happen. Though, I guess you could say that’s a tumblr problem, but holy shit is it obvious in this community. And now panphobia is starting to be cool and hip too, which now directly targets me as someone who’s pan. Like I’ve been telling everyone we need to stop platforming these people and it feels like this is like. a punishment for fighting against it. And don’t get me started on the increasing plyphobia, polyamphobia, etc. This is just becoming a cisgay circle jerk and it’s PAINFUL.

- Holy shit the goddamn discourse. So many of y’all slept on my actual important discourse concerning people like stimmywhale but then demonized users for such STUPID shit that isn’t even problematic to begin with. Get some fucking priorities and I’m begging you to get off this site and get some perspective on what really matters.

- y’all. stealing. everything. and. not. crediting. anything.

- the weird fucking cliques in the community. Some of y’all are adults, fucking act like you are this isn’t fucking mean girls jesus christ. I guess you could blame other spaces for that too but, again, it is REALLY obvious. And it sucks when I have followers or fans who have been afraid of me because they think I’ll be like that. I don’t even participate in it and I get wrapped up in it, treat each other like human fucking beings.

- the fact, like I said, I literally can’t have a death in my family without being harassed for it. who the fuck gets off on watching me mourn.

there’s plenty of other problems, but I can’t say this is specific to the stim community. I’ve been fighting in this losing battle for years even before this community and I need to find out what’s going to make me happy and productive. 

I’ll remain in the stim server and I’ve posted my other blogs here in the past, you could find them pretty quick.

goodbye for now.