#our gene pool istg

[nametakensff]

.

[yakumtsaki]

It’s moments after we moved in and Sophito’s first order of business is to get high with Glitched Overpaid Butler #6. 

-Who cares if you’re on the clock, dude? You have to learn to slow down and enjoy life or you’ll go crazy serving some rich assholes!

Sophito, I don’t know how to tell you this, but we’re the ‘rich assholes’ except we’re fucking broke.

-Oh ya? Then how come we can afford a butler?

WE CAN’T BUT YOU PEOPLE KEEP SETTING FIRES TRYING TO COOK. We’re straight up living scholarship to scholarship, which looking @ our grades no one in this run seems to be getting any time soon. ANYWAY. In happier news I know an OTP when I see one..

..so Julian invites over his gf Stacy Go so she can pledge! Not only do these two have 3 bolts, she’s a romance sim with the Rock God LTW to Julian’s pleasure aspiration Professional Party Guest LTW, talk about compatible lifestyles! I’m so glad to have one (1) person that’s attracted to appropriate people around here, and yes, June, I’m looking at you.

-Me?!

YOU. Don’t think because I’ve been busy with the Eliza/Reginald/Wilfred/Sophito fiasco that I’m not keeping an eye on you and your well-established Lannister tendencies.

-I don’t know what you’re talking about!

OH REALLY. 

Exhibit A.

-Totally innocent!

Exhibit B.

-I was tired from studying!

EXHIBIT C. BOY AM I GLAD I DOWNLOADED THAT EXTENDED FAMILY MOD

-I was tired from watching Reginald give financial advice on the internet!

DON’T EVEN. Now listen to me, you beautiful lunatic, this ends NOW. We will find you someone from a different gene pool and that’s the last I wanna hear about this. Now it’s time to get Wilfred settled with someone else..

..HI CLAIRE. Ever since these two started randomly beating each other up and stopping to heartfart I’ve had high hopes for this toxic af pairing. 

-Looking good, Claire, thanks for coming over! I’m still furious at you and might beat you up later! :D -Thanks for having me, Wilfred, I’m gonna tear that toupee off and make you eat it! :D What’s that horrible noise? -Oh that’s just my cousin, Sugar, he watched some National Geographic and decided to come up with a mating call of his own.

-WOOOOOEEEEEWOOOOOEEEEEEECLUCKCLUCKCLUCK

Sugar istg. 

-What?? It’s gonna work!!!

Serious q, how has our Greek House not been banned from campus yet?

-Oh I remember him, he serenaded me once in the dorms without ever having interacted with me. *WOOOOOEEEEEWOOOOOEEEEEEECLUCKCLUCKCLUCK* -Sounds like him, he lacks the social graces the rest of us Unions take for granted, like me beating you up for example! -Haha! Wait, you’re serious?  *WOOOOOEEEEEWOOOOOEEEEEEECLUCKCLUCKCLUCK* -Well of course, everyone knows beating someone up is the start of any healthy relationship! -Sure it is, sorry, I’ll be right back.

WHAT

W H A T

W H A T 

-I told you it would work! WOOOOOEEEEEWOOOOOEEEEEEECLUCKCLUCK

[thicc-kirk]

My landlady went on for like five minutes about how stunningly beautiful my sister is and then added "and I mean, you're.........cute".

Thank you. After 31 years I still never get tired of being constantly reminded that I'm not as aesthetically pleasing as my sister.