#polaris touchstarved

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Did I show y’all the updated Polaris art that I commissioned @todayis-snowy to make? No?

Well, now I have! The boy is finally here! And now he is finally like…actually so perfect and I’m finally happy with his design!

He has no more giant face scar

I love him so, so much! I spend so much time staring at this because it’s wonderful! Everyone, go throw yourselves at Snowy’s feet because she is WONDERFUL (and don’t steal this because then I’ll cry)

[justanaspiringsomeone]

Noticed Features

@the-gentle-jade-river MC, Polaris and my unnamed MC, Keiki!

They seem to notice each other’s odd features so it’ll be a bit awkward…

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There’s a cool and cute kiss picrew I’ve been seeing so here it is with Polaris and Ais!!

This also functions as a little preview for talk of the overhaul I’m doing with Polaris’ design

(Why is Polaris crying?)

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Polaris

Flower: Water lily

Meaning:

-Rebirth

-Resilience

-Transendence

Beautiful and pure, the water lily blooms from the mud, bearing no stains from the filth. In Eridia, the flowers represent rebirth, and are given as gifts of new beginnings

To celebrate Polaris’ birthday, I made him a little bust with his flower! I want to put it on the template, but I don’t feel like fiddling around with it today….

Is it perfect? No. Will I redraw it as I get better at art? Obviously

Am I still insanely happy with this? Absolutely

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I couldn’t decide so I did all three!! Have some hair down Polaris!! And also one with no scar because they didn’t have a scar option

(And pretend in the one that it’s a hanbok jacket he’s wearing because he’s Korean but there was no option for that either, lol)

Tags (sorry if you’ve been tagged already):

@hollana @toeridiaorbust @vereing

TOUCHSTARVED FANDOM PICREW GAME !

create your persona or mc then share & tag some friends! use any of these you want 1 - 2 - 3 🤍

have fun ! <3

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I’m having ✨emotions✨ thinking about the ways Polaris can either heal or fester with each LI. These may change as more info on the characters comes out, but I’m excited about the potential (y’all can tell which characters I feel like I have a more solid understanding of through this lol)

Mhin, Healing: They help each other accept the monstrous aspects of themselves. How to love themselves not despite the monster but loving themselves wholly, monster and everything

Mhin, Festering: They both obsess over preserving their humanity, to the point that it’s lost to the obsession. They become more desperate and depraved and cling to each other in a desperate hope that the other will anchor them to humanity

Ais, Healing: Polaris comes to see the beauty in his draconic nature in part due to Ais’s love and understanding of all creatures. Ais is no longer under Ocudeus’ control. He isn’t lonely anymore, and he nurtures his more gentle side

Ais, Festering: Polaris begins destroying himself out of self-hatred. Ais is completely lost to Ocudeus, and Polaris drinks from the SeaSpring hoping to join Ais again

Vere, Healing: Polaris learns not to fear his draconic nature. He learns how to control it, harness its power, and how to let loose without losing control. Vere is free from the Senobium, and gets to explore more of himself

Vere, Festering: Polaris destroys the Senobium in a fit of rage to free Vere. The two enable each other, going on a path of power seeking and destruction

Kuras, Healing: Kuras learns how to forgive himself, Polaris starts to explore more of himself and feels safe. He knows that he can’t hurt Kuras, and so he doesn’t fear losing control. He and Kuras work through their trauma together, supporting each other every step of the way

Kuras, Festering: Polaris dies, Kuras goes mad with grief

Leander, Healing: Polaris gets to experience intimacy in a way he never has, with his hands intertwined with Leander’s. Leander can drop his facade because Polaris won’t judge or leave him.

Leander, Festering: I honestly don’t know yet. Death is involved for sure. Maybe Leander finds out about Polaris’ draconic nature, and uses him as a source of magical ingredients. Sees him as a tool more than a person. Polaris is vulnerable, and easily manipulated into staying even though he’s not happy

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Character bio for Polaris for Touchstarved!!!

Sprite by @/arc.xus on Instagram!!

Template by @redspringstudio

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Don’t mind me, just dropping a little diagram of how Polaris fluff/scale ratio is

It isn’t super shaggy on his belly, but his belly is in fact furry and fluffy

Anywhere that doesn’t have little scales drawn has fur on it essentially. And because fantasy doesn’t mean I need logic, there are scales under his fur. Probably. Maybe.

As per usual art by arc_xus on instagram

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Overall, Polaris feels his life is defined by loss. He lost his parents, his home, his first lover/closest friend

He’s terrified of letting people close to him. He’s afraid that opening up means he’ll lose someone again. He’s flighty and enigmatic, and sometimes he’s curt.

But he’s also gentle, loyal, and loving. The world he lives in has taken so much from him, so why should he owe anything to anyone? Why shouldn’t he get angry and selfish and destroy everything around him?

Why doesn’t he? He could have become a villain, a horrid person. But he doesn’t

He chooses to be kind still, even though he’s flighty and even though he’s mysterious, he can’t bring himself to be truly unkind. Because that means he’s become like the unforgiving, terrible world that’s hurt him. And he doesn’t want to let that cruelty win and pull another into the ranks of horrid people

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Polaris always tried to make it clear that he didn’t have romantic feelings towards Daniil. He was always very forthcoming about that, especially when Daniil started to flirt with him.

Polaris had also really valued his friendship with Daniil, and that got held over him and used to guilt him about not wanting any further relationship.

Daniil likes to say that Polaris lead him on

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This is something Polaris desperately needs to be told. Even before reclaiming his draconic nature

He’s been told he’s a monstrosity for so long, and told that it’s a bad thing

That he isn’t worthy of love

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Final outfit redesign for Polaris!! I finally found a ref I liked and used it.

I have learned that having too many refs for one outfit is Bad and Overwhelming for me. Oh, and I remembered to put my signature this time!!!

I smacked it with a watercolor splash brush just because I thought the texture would be cool

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Polaris reclaiming his draconic heritage is something that’s in the long run very good for him, and it’s something that makes him finally feel whole

But in the moment it’s devastating and horrible and it feels like the end of the world for him. He’s lived so long without knowing this part of himself, and not even knowing it exists that he feels like he’s losing his humanity by gaining his dragonhood

It doesn’t matter that dragons are revered in his home country. It doesn’t matter that dragons aren’t seen as “bad” or “evil” typically

What matters is that his world is completely and irreversibly changed, and that he’s a “monster” now. Everything feels so different to him, and for a long time he’s actually scared of his draconic nature and features

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Officially, I am changing Polaris’ Korean name.

He is now Cheong Han-Byul

Han-Byul means “big/bright star” so Polaris is kind of just the translation of that

I considered Bitgaram (bright river) but I think Han-Byul suits him more

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Ais and his tattoo that swirls over his skin and Polaris with his pearlescent scales that create swirled patterns on his skin

They’re so reminiscent of each other that way and it really feels like Touchstarved and Ais were made for Polaris

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Aight, so Vere may be my least favorite LI but I still have ✨ideas✨ about him and Polaris

With Vere, Polaris is allowed to let loose. Vere let’s Polaris lose control without yelling at him, without getting mad

He lets Polaris feel the full extent of his emotions before working through them together

He helps Polaris when he reclaims his draconic heritage and doesn’t know how to control it

Vere let’s Polaris be wild and free, and let’s him figure out how he wants to temper that instead of pushing his own ideas. And then helps Polaris reach his goals