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#ppl who just don't know the immense pain that comes with endo... god i wish i could talk more openly about that
kachulein
·
10 months
Text
I'm proud of myself for being able to make it all the way home and wait until I was in my room to start sobbing🤧
#to hell with that stupid pmdd
#during that time every lil thing makes me cry and i hate it
#i had an 9am gym session
#my second of the 36 sessions of prevention training (idk the right word in english) after surgery & physical therapy
#and it was fine and all
#but then at the end my trainer asked when i wanted the next session
#and i asked for towards the end of next week
#because i'll be busy trying not to die from endo this weekend and the beginning of next week
#and i thought i might be able to barely function towards the end of the week
#but then he was like 'you gotta train 2-3x a week'
#yeah normally that would be fine but!! not!! during!! my!! endo!! week!!
#but of course i didn't have the confidence to explain it because talking to people is so hard for me
#so now i have a gym session during the worst days of the month and idk how i'm supposed to do any exercises when i can barely walk
#ppl who just don't know the immense pain that comes with endo... god i wish i could talk more openly about that
#and especially tell men that it just isn't possible to get anything done during that time
#so yeah
#of course i was upset because it didn't go as i planned
#and i was upset that i once again wasn't able to put my boundaries in place
#and then i just walked past so many people on my way home
#and i hate that so much because passing by strangers makes me uncomfortable
#so in the end i just needed a good sobbing session
#while jinnie was sleeping next to me :')
#but now i'll probably dive back into my book
#forget that this world exists and ignore all the tasks i have to complete
#because i've had 5 appointments this week and i am dead now
#kachu rambles
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