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tanzanite-zircon · 2 years

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I posted 204 times in 2022

23 posts created (11%)

181 posts reblogged (89%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@niyana-the-ambiguous-mobian

@huntersapprentice

@queenofgravyfries

@justpastryvideos

I tagged 134 of my posts in 2022

Only 34% of my posts had no tags

#rottmnt - 14 posts

#pokemon - 13 posts

#bulbasaur - 12 posts

#veggietales - 10 posts

#rc9gn - 7 posts

#larry the cucumber - 6 posts

#rottmnt movie - 6 posts

#bob the tomato - 5 posts

#new kid sp - 5 posts

#south park - 5 posts

Longest Tag: 82 characters

#anyone else disappointed that he didn’t do a tmnt reference for the turtle segment

My Top Posts in 2022:

The Fractured but Whole: Freedom Pals Unite! Chapter 3: Pick a class, any class

I watch Doctor Timothy back up his wheelchair to the center of the room as my new teammates line up on both sides of him. Mysterion and Toolshed stand on his right side while Tupperware and Wonder Tweek stand on his left.

(Maybe my initiation isn’t over yet.)

[New kid, before you can go out into the field, we will need to brief you on our origins.]

(Oh right, Timmy told me he was going to tell me about their start.) I nod my head to let them know to start their story.

[Toolshed has probably mentioned this to you before, but we were all once members of another superhero franchise called Coon and Friends. Our leader was, of course, The Coon and there were ten members in total. I was in the process of developing movies, television shows, video games, and other programs for everyone to earn large sums of money for the team. However, my ideas were tossed aside by The Coon and replaced with his own. We split off to form Freedom Pals once we saw his biased franchise plan.]

“The Coon’s franchise plan screwed each of us over,” Toolshed exclaims, “While we had at most one program each, everyone who stayed with Coon and Friends had around five or even more programs for themselves!”

“We treat each other as equals here,” Mysterion softly growls, “but The Coon only looks out for himself. He built us into a pyramid and put himself on top!”

“Our franchise was doing great at first,” Tupperware adds, “We had one hundred followers on our Coonstagram page. By my calculations, we would have doubled in fans in a few hours, but The Coon started stealing credit for our heroic deeds and swindled us out of our past leads on the crime syndicate.”

“To make matters worse,” Wonder Tweek growls, “his teammates are starting to stoop to his level and stealing our missions. Kyle, Jimmy, Clyde, … even my ex-boyfriend.” I jump back at the last few words.

(Woah, Wait! You and Craig broke up?!)

[As you can see, the split resulted in bad feelings and nearly broken relationships, but we believe we made the right choice in splitting off. And with you now on our side my friend and the lead you provided us, the tide may finally change back to our favor.]

“What new lead Doc,” Tupperware questions.

[While looking through the New Kid’s memories, he informed me of a poster The Coon had in his possession. The poster detailed a $100 reward for the return of the cat Scrambles.]

“Wait, I’ve heard that name being passed around by the top six graders on my patrols,” Mysterion declares, “Doc, do you think…”

[Indeed, I do. I believe that this Scrambles is the epicenter of the current crime wave. The police have been bringing in many stray cats these past few weeks, and from Mysterion’s investigations on the current activities of the citizens, I believe we may be dealing with the drug craze of ‘cheesing’.] I notice Mysterion flinch when Doctor Timothy said the word ‘cheesing’. I remember Kenny telling me about that ‘boob-utopia’ when I found a cat sling in his closet when we were hanging out one time with Stan, Kyle, Butters, and, sadly, Cartman. He said he gave up ‘cheesing’ long before I moved here, so I guess the mention of it would remind him of his rehab.

“You mean the crime wave is all about getting cat cheese,” Tweek shrieks.

[I know it sounds farfetched, but it would explain why the adults in our town have gone from the usual crazy to near insanity. It would also explain why the police would collect all these stray cats. I believe that someone is trying to take over our town by drugging the adults with cat urine. And Scrambles must be the bottom bitch of the whole operation. If we can secure this cat, we may be able to track down the crime boss.]

“Coon and Friends will be looking for this cat to,” Toolshed replies, “but I’m willing to bet that The Coon is only interested in the cash reward.”

(Since Cartman stole your leads before, I think it’s only fair we steal this one right under his nose … or is it whiskers?)

[I will research more about Scrambles. In the meantime, you all try to find more missions or any more leads. Tupperware, please assist our rookie with choosing a superhero class and explain the basics of the powers and combat before you depart. New Kid, once you have selected a class, come and see me for your final debriefing. I will be waiting for you in my chamber.] Doctor Timothy guides his wheelchair back to the back chamber while Wonder Tweek and Mysterion pull the space curtains apart to let him in. I feel hand clasp my shoulder. I turn my head to see Toolshed grinning from ear to ear. I can’t help but grin back.

“Told you you’d get in,” Toolshed playfully jabs, “I’ll call you if I find a mission. I’ll see you later dude.” He gives me a quick thumbs-up before trudging up the stairs. Wonder Tweek waves at me before following Toolshed. I wave back before turning my head to Mysterion. He gives me a wink before trudging up the stairs.

(This is it Sally. You’re now a Freedom Pal.) I turn my attention to the base; I never got to really look at it when Toolshed first brought me. Everything is decorated with cardboard boxes, a city backdrop, LED lights, stars and planets, and what look like to be my teammates’ superhero gear.

(It must have taken the guys hours or even a whole day to decorate this place! Maybe they’ll let me add some of my superhero stuff… if I get any.)

“Hey dude, you coming or what,” Tupperware calls. I snap out of my thoughts and head towards him. He leads me into a makeshift room with walls made of cardboard boxes and yellow masking tape forming a grid on the floor and walls.

“This is our training room,” Tupperware says, “We use virtual reality to test our powers and prepare for any disasters, crimes, or anything that could go wrong in our quiet mountain town.” I raise an eyebrow and cock my head in confusion.

(What virtual reality? There’s nothing here but tape and boxes.) I hear Tupperware give a soft chuckle as he turns towards an I-pad. He types in a code and everything suddenly goes dark. The masking tape glows a cyan blue while the walls glow a navy blue. My eyes widen as I stare around the transformed room.

(I never knew boxes and tape could do this!) Tupperware removes the I-pad from its stand and turns to face me.

“Ok New Kid,” he declares, “I’ve selected three beginner classes for you to choose from. You can choose from Speedster, Brutalist, or Blaster. Each class has different levels of brawn, brains, spunk, health, and movement. Brawn increases the damage done by melee attacks, brains increase the damage done by ranged, mental, and magic attacks, spunk increases the effects of support abilities like healing and shielding, health, of course, affects how large your maximum health is, and movement increases how many spaces you can move on the battle grid. Our training program will create a set of powers for you based on which class you choose. Here, pick the one you like the best.” He hands me the tablet. I look at the pictures of the superheroes with their specific class. I tap each picture to see their affects. Speedster and Brutalist are nearly the same; they mostly have brawn affects with one spunk affect. I then look over at the third class, Blaster. I look over its four attacks in awe.

(Great range, burn affects, and a sweet costume to boot! I think I found my class.) I press the button for select class and return the I-pad to Tupperware.

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4 notes - Posted May 12, 2022

The Fractured but Whole: Freedom Pals Unite! Chapter 1: I’ve got just the ‘Toolshed’ for this problem

(… Well shit.)

I stare at the line of lava covering Cartman’s door step in annoyance. All I wanted was to play with my friends and now I’m a prisoner in Cartman’s living room. I was playing Fighters of Zaron with Kyle, Butters, Craig, Clyde, and Jimmy when Cartman suddenly jumped into his backyard dressed up as some sort of mutant racoon claiming to be from the future. Seriously, what the fuck is going on! He called us over to his house, saying that he needed help from the Fighters of Zaron and their king.

… It should be ‘queen’ since I’m actually a girl, but they’re not ready to know that yet. I might lose them and the others as my friends if they find out I’m really a girl. Cartman wouldn’t be that big of a loss, but losing Kenny, Butters, Stan, Kyle, and the others would be a huge blow. I’ll never understand why my parents force me to pretend that I’m a boy.

… Anyway, back to the flashback. I hear Craig say that they’re not playing that anymore and then Clyde said that they were all split up. What were they talking about?

(Now that I think about it, I didn’t see Kenny, Stan, Token, Tweek, or Timmy anywhere. And what did Clyde mean by they were all split up? Are they fighting again?)

I then saw Cartman holding poster showing a missing cat named Scrambles and that it would offer an award of $100 to anyone who finds Scrambles. It wouldn’t surprise me that the fatass would seize the chance to earn $100. I then heard him say something about a massive crime wave threatening our town. Some sort of crime syndicate. I then hear Clyde say that this would be too big of a problem for Coon and Friends. Cartman then asks the guys if they would rather let the Freedom Pals find Scrambles first and get the reward for their franchise.

I am just completely lost at this point. Mrs. Cartman then alerts Cartman that some sort of noise is coming from his basement. Apparently, it’s something called the Coon alert. The next thing I know, Kyle, Craig, Jimmy, Clyde, Butters, and Cartman all run out on me, Kevin, and the other two members of the Moorish tribe. Cartman just basically calls us dorks and says that we can’t play with them anymore. I try to follow him to see what’s going on but he stops me.

“Sorry Douchebag,” He snarled, “but I’m not going to let you play this game with us. Nothing you say will convince me, not even the fact that your dad fucked your mom.” He closes the sliding door of his kitchen.

(What that actual fuck! Why would he bring something like that up?)

And that now leaves me stranded in Cartman’s living room. Kevin and the others did invite me to hang out with them, but that mostly involved sulking and doing nothing. I left them at the gates of Kupa Keep and entered Cartman’s house. I noticed that there was a password lock on the basement door, so I won’t be able to get in without the code. Cartman probably has it written somewhere, but do I really want to get involved with Cartman again after last time?

I decide to try and leave his house, but that’s where the lava comes in. I can feel heat from the Lego brick lava pile covering the steps. Curse my dedication to the game. Mrs. Cartman is apparently calling the police to remove the lava from the door step.

(… Ok, we can get away with calling this lava because we’re kids, but come on! How gullible is this woman? … Come on Sally, stay focused. Maybe I can climb the fence of Cartman’s backyard to get out.) I turn on my heels and slowly walk back towards the backyard.

I suddenly hear the sound of crunching snow. I turn back towards the open door and notice a kid decked out with power tools talking into his wrist.

“Yeah. I’ll be there in five minutes Mysterion. Toolshed out!”

(Toolshed? … Wait. I recognize that voice. Is that… Stan? It is!) As he ends his call with this ‘Mysterion,’ he turns towards Cartman’s house and notices me.

“Douchebag,” I hear him say, “What are you doing here?”

The only answer I can give him is a quick glance at the lava. I had become used to being silent, since my family tries to isolate me from other people most of the time. They have been able to determine what I want to say by looking at my eyes or body language.

“Oh, that’s why,” Stan replies, “Ok, hang on. I’ll take care of it.” He then jogs over to Cartman’s garage and opens the garage door. He comes back carrying a small portable generator. I watch as he plugs in a large jack-hammer shaped tool and points it at the lava.

“Stand back Douchebag,” Stan warns, “My sandblaster is pretty powerful. I don’t want you to get hit with any lava.” I quickly nod and take two steps to my right. I hear the sandblaster reave up and the next thing I see is red bricks flying into Cartman’s living room.

“Oh, never mind,” Mrs. Cartman sings into the phone, “One of my Poopsickins’ friends took care of it.”

(… Damn this woman.)

“You can come out now dude,” I hear Stan declare. I pull myself away from the wall and walk out of living room. I greet Stan with a grateful smile. He smirks at me while twirling an electric drill with his fingers as if to say ‘You’re welcome.’ I get a better look at his costume and I have to say, it’s awesome. He’s equipped with yellow eye glasses, a white t-shirt, blue jeans, black and red tennis shoes, red and black gloves, and a utility belt.

(Hey! He’s not wearing his hat! That’s a rare sight.) I notice him looking me over.

“Dude, why are you dressed like that,” Stan questions. I wasn’t wearing the costume given to me during our raid on the Fortress of Darkness. I basically looked like Jesus without the beard he is usually seen with. My costume now consisted of black tennis shoes, blue jeans, a light blue t-shirt, a red cape, and a crown. I point towards Cartman’s backyard, showing Stan the castle of Kupa Keep.

“I thought we stopped playing that when Cartman threw the Stick of Truth into Stark’s Pond,” Stan replies.

(I thought it had more to do with the fact that Kenny became a Nazi zombie and nearly killed us.)

We didn’t exactly stop playing the game. After saving Kenny by farting on his balls, we ended the war and united the kingdoms to form the Fighters of Zaron. I was crowned a king, but I was considered lower in rank to Cartman and Kyle.

I then see Kevin and the other two boys walk out of Cartman’s living room.

“Well, I’m gonna go play Star Trek VR,” Kevin says with excitement, “Bye Johnny. Bye Andre.” He waves goodbye before walking towards his house.

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5 notes - Posted May 12, 2022

The Fractured but Whole: Freedom Pals Unite! Chapter 5: Mission 1: Dolly in Danger Part 1

Mysterion and I climb down from the window pane and into Karen’s bedroom. I feel a chill run down my spine, not only due to the temperature of the room, but also, it’s condition. The room is extremely dirty, with cracks all around the ceiling and walls. The carpet is stained with mystery stains and her furniture looks like it’s about to fall apart at the seams! Her bed is only an extremely filthy mattress! Even though she decorated the walls with multiple drawn pictures of pink butterflies and flowers, the horrible sting of the overall living conditions of the McCormick household overpowers it.

It was moments like this where I really felt pity for Kenny and his family. His dad is usually drunk, almost as bad as Randy; he can’t hold down a job because of it. His mom washes dishes at the local Olive Garden, but she only earns enough for electricity, pop tarts, and frozen waffles, if she is able to keep it away from her husband and her oldest son, Kevin. Kenny seems to be the only member of the family that is trying to better their lives. He’s been working for Mr. Kim at City Wok in order to earn extra money for the house, himself, and Karen. I know that Karen would want to help the family, but she’s too young to understand how hard that is to do.

(No wonder he uses Mysterion to try and change his family’s ways.) I look over to Karen and fell my heart sink even more. Her face shows signs of healing bruises and her green coat is wrinkled and stained. Her maroon gloves look ready to unravel. Her black pants and shoes look alright, and her hair is tied into two cute little pigtails. I watch as Karen runs into Mysterion’s arms, trying hard not to cry again. Mysterion looks at me with a worried look on his face. He smooths Karen’s hair in an attempt to calm her down.

“Shhh, Karen,” Mysterion soothes, “I’m here. Tell what’s wrong.” She lifts her head from Mysterion’s chest and looks up at him. She looks like she’s about to say something, but then she turns her head to me.

“Who is that,” Karen softly asks. Mysterion looks at me and back at his sister.

“Uhh … He’s a guardian angel in training. I brought him along to learn what it means to be a guardian angel.”

(Guardian angel? … Wait, Karen called Kenny that. … Oh my gosh! Kenny, you are a saint!) I can’t help but beam at the realization of what else Kenny’s been doing as Mysterion. I see Mysterion return a soft smile before returning his attention to Karen.

“Karen, please tell us what’s wrong.” She wipes away the emerging tears from her eyes before looking back up at Mysterion.

“I wanted to play with some of the girls from my class at the playground,” Karen whimpers, “so I brought my doll so I could play too. But then these big kids came and started kicking sand at us. I tried to get away, but they pushed me to the ground. They picked on the girls I was playing with and said that hanging out with a poor kid will make them poor to. They then took all of our dolls and ran away. The girls started calling me names and blaming me for what happened. I … I didn’t mean for any of this to happen!” Karen buries her face into Mysterion’s chest and bitterly cries. My heart stops sinking and starts shattering. Mysterion switches between faces of pity and anger.

“So, you’re upset that those girls blamed you for their dolls being taken away,” Mysterion questions.

“No,” Karen squeaks as she looks back up at Mysterion, “I’m more worried about my big brother Kenny! He bought me my doll, and now it’s gone! I lost a gift from him! How can I ever face him after this?!” Karen hugs Mysterion tighter as more crystal tears fall down her cheeks. My heart shatters into dust.

(She’s more worried about Kenny being mad at her for losing her doll.) Mysterion looks as if he’s about to start crying too. He gently kisses Karen’s forehead and holds her closer.

“Karen, your brother loves you. I know that he won’t stop loving you just because your doll was taken from you. Please, don’t think like that.” Karen only continues to cry into Mysterion’s chest. Mysterion’s entire being seems to dim. He falls silent and continues to hug Karen.

I feel the dust of my heart flare up and freeze over. You’d think our modernization would make the citizens of our quiet mountain town more cautious of how they treat one another. … Then again, they did send Officer Barbrady to kill us when we scared many homeless people away from Kenny’s house, forcing them to make camp around Shi Tpa Town and the Whole Foods. Once they learned that we were just playing ninjas, they pushed the blame onto Barbrady when he accidentally shot David. I return my attention to Karen and feel a powerful tugging at my heart. I pull out my note pad and start writing.

(It’s my duty as a Freedom Pal to help the people of this town, and Karen McCormick is one of the few people that truly deserves our help.) I finish my message and clear my throat to get Karen’s attention. As she turns her head towards me, I show her the note.

{We’ll get your doll back for you.} Karen wipes her eyes and looks at me with hope twinkling in her eyes.

“You … you will,” Karen stammers. I give her a sweet smile and confidently nod my head. Karen’s frown transforms into a wide grin as she let’s go of Mysterion and wraps her arms around my waist.

“Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you,” she squeals in delight. I fell the pieces of my heart begin to reassemble as I pat her head. Mysterion gives me a look of pride before returning to his poker face. As Karen let’s go of me, I pull out my note pad again.

{Now, what does your doll look like?}

“She looks like this,” Karen replies. She walks over to the dresser and pulls out one of the bottom drawers. She lifts out a long, medium-sized box and hands it to me. I look at the photo of the doll at the back of the box. It has a baby-like face with rosy cheeks, pink lips, blue eyes, and long eyelashes. Its blonde hair is tied into the same pigtails Karen has. It wears a hot pink dress with a blue flower sown into the side and dark pink flats. I quickly snap a photo of the doll before handing the box back to Karen.

“Please be careful Guardian Angels,” Karen pleads, “The big kids who took my doll were really big and mean.” I pat Karen’s head and give her a reassuring smile. Mysterion gives her a quick hug before leading me back to the window.

“Don’t worry Karen,” Mysterion consoles, “We can handle this.” We pull ourselves onto the window pane and jump down onto the ground. We jog over to the rain gutter and climb up it to reach the roof. Once my feet are on the roof’s surface, Mysterion gently grabs my shoulders and pulls me to the side.

“Thanks for stepping in back there,” Mysterion thanks, “You really gave Karen a hope boost.”

{How could I say no that face?}

“Heh, yeah. One look from Karen and I’m putty in her hands too. If my kryptonite wasn’t poverty, it would be her.” He leaps over to the roof of his garage and trudges up the curved roof of Bi the garage. As I catch up to him, we notice Mrs. Broflovski pulling Gerald away by his ear across the front yard.

“HOW COULD YOU DO THIS,” Shelia rants, “YOU’RE LUCKY THAT KENNY CALLED ME BEFORE YOU COULD DO ANYTHING STUPID!”

“UNHAND ME YOU VILE MAMMARY GOBLIN,” Gerald screeches. I stifle a snicker at the scene. Mysterion smirks in amusement before leading us over to the back of the roof and climbing down onto the glass railing. I follow right behind as we descend down the stairs and out of the abandoned shop.

“Alright Douchebag,” Mysterion instructs, “all investigations should start at the scene of the crime. We’d better head over to the playground. The kids there may have seen what happened to Karen’s doll.” I quickly nod my head and jog behind Mysterion across his yard. We pass over the train tracks and head over to where Kyle’s house is. We turn just a few meters from Kyle’s front lawn and approach the open gate of the playground. I am met the playful cheers of kindergarteners, 1st graders, and a few 2nd graders playing on the pirate themed fort, slide, and swings. I’d have to say that there are about 12 kids in total. I notice Mysterion’s overall demeanor begin to soften as he approaches the sand lot. A little boy with spiky black hair, black sneakers, blue jeans, and a red t-shirt with a monster truck on it notices us and jumps up in excitement.

“It’s Mysterion,” he chants. He rushes over to Mysterion and jumps into his arms just as the other kids begin to stop what they’re doing and rush over themselves. I watch as a wall of bubbly children circle around Mysterion, trying to get his attention by showing him toys or pictures on their phones, tugging on his cloak, or by hugging his legs. Mysterion chuckles in amusement and adoration as he places the black-haired kid down on the asphalt.

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7 notes - Posted May 12, 2022

Bob Belcher is a badass!

Loud warning

19 notes - Posted June 24, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Some Randy Cunningham practice.

(I just drew a screenshot from the season 1 finale because I can’t draw this on my own yet 😅)

30 notes - Posted May 24, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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