#relatively short delay compared to some of the unanswered asks i've had sitting in my drafts for two years that i still fully intend to

[bestbonnist]

I eenjoyed your meta about Kahaku (avoiding the other ones because i haven't read modern arc at all), but how do you think Fushi might feel about Kahaku? At this point in the anime I really can't tell, though I know he DID think of him as a good friend before the nokkers officially started attacking and the Left Arm started lying

Don't worry I've got you! This topic is covered extensively later in the manga, and if the anime receives a third season you can expect that it'll answer your question better than I can! But basically, Fushi considers Kahaku a friend on the level of March/Tonari/Gugu/etc., someone who they would want to spend the rest of their life with. If anything, Kahaku's actions during the battle of Renryrr only reinforced this.

Fushi asked Kahaku for help. Pretty un-subtly. They went to visit him, dropped a line about how tired they were, and then left. Fushi would never tell their other comrades how fed up they were with their attitude, or rest while there are people dying. Their guilt complex won't allow it. But they're fucking thinking about it. Kahaku is like all of Fushi's darkest, most selfish thoughts with no impulse control. Fushi can't blame him for seeing the truth under the surface and reacting to it.

Elaborating on the previous paragraph, none of the things Fushi wants are particularly selfish or harmful to other people. They just think that if they're not actively helping others constantly, they're not paying the world back for the pain they inflict on others just by existing. Doing something for themselves is unthinkably evil. The reason I phrased things in that way is to better explain why, from Fushi's perspective, they're still friends with Kahaku. Because he accepts the parts of themselves they hate.

No one has treated Fushi this gently in a very long time. They've been on their own since Pioran died, so it's not that surprising that they folded as soon as they had someone to rely on again. Even though it ended in about the worst possible way it could have, that doesn't negate the fact that Kahaku was able to be that person when they needed it. That still means something.

By the way, all my posts that contain spoilers for the anime are tagged "#fnae anime spoilers" so feel free to block that tag if you don't want to see any stuff beyond what's already aired.