#rip jack you would have loved 'change' by alex g

[charlioak]

don't cry darlin

[fandom-madnessess]

Light Inside

Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor Rating: G, Word Count: 1557 Fluff, Canon Universe, Pumpkins, Halloween, Lena knows Kara is Supergirl, but Kara doesn’t know Lena knows, POV Lena ♥ Read on AO3

(11th fic for my 13 Days of Halloween 2016)

Only one person is allowed to walk straight through to Lena’s office without being waylaid by her assistant. So when the door opens without it being preceded by a call from her assistant or a knock, a smile immediately curls her lips. She looks up from her work to greet Kara, and her eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

‘Nice pumpkins you’ve got there,’ she says, lacing the remark with flirtation. Delighted at Kara’s blush, her smile grows. Keeping her eyes and smile on Kara, she stands up and walks to the other side of her desk. ‘Those look heavy. Did you carry them all the way up here?’

‘Oh, uhm…’ Kara looks uncertain for a moment. ‘They’re not as heavy as they look.’

Lena raises her eyebrows again. Sure they’re not, for Kara.

‘To what do I owe the pleasure of having you and your pumpkins visit my office?’ Lena asks, leaning back against her desk.

‘Well, I remembered you saying you’ve never carved a pumpkin before so… Tada!’ Kara grins. ‘I thought you could come over sometime this week, and I could show you.’

Lena can only stare at Kara, not sure what to say. Warmth fills her chest and she has to remind herself to breathe. Whenever she’s with Kara she feels lighter, the Luthor name not feeling so heavy; but it’s moments like this, when Kara remembers something that Lena can’t even recall telling her, something that was no more than a throwaway comment, that Lena feels like she’s just Lena.

‘Unless you don’t want to,’ Kara adds, uncertainty creeping into her voice at Lena’s silence.

‘I’d love to,’ Lena assures her. ‘I just thought this was something you and Alex did.’

‘Alex and I make ours the day before Halloween, that way they’re still perfect on the night itself. Not that you should have anything less than a perfect jack-o’-lantern,’ Kara quickly adds. ‘But after practising on these you can always make another one.’

Lena closes her eyes, biting her lip to stop her smile from growing too big, and listens as Kara rambles her way out of the hole she thinks she dug for herself. When she opens her eyes again, there’s that adorable crinkle between Kara’s eyebrows, the one she gets when her thoughts are going through her mind faster than she can express them.

‘Let me check my schedule, okay?’ she says, putting a hand on Kara’s arm to halt the avalanche of words.

‘Great,’ Kara beams.

Lena knows her week is full, but there’s always one or two things that can be put off, especially if it means she gets to hang out with Kara.

‘How about Thursday? I have an early dinner meeting, but I can be at your place by eight.’

‘Perfect,’ Kara agrees. ‘Me and my pumpkins will see you on Thursday.’

~

Lena closes her eyes with a sigh as she slides into her car. She hates budget meetings, doing them over sushi makes them only marginally less boring.

‘Home, Miss Luthor?’ her driver asks.

‘No. Kara Danvers’ apartment,’ she says.

She tries not to let her nerves take over on the drive. It’s not a date. It’s just the two of them, hanging out, alone, in Kara’s apartment. They’ll be carving pumpkins. And maybe, at some point, Kara will be behind her, pressing against her back as she guides her hand. Warm fingers curled around her wrist…

Lena laughs at herself. If she’s going to resort to romantic clichés in her fantasies, she could at least come up with something that doesn’t involve knives.

‘You are very formally dressed for pumpkin carving,’ Kara says when she lets her in twenty minutes later.

Lena looks down at her silk blouse, pencil skirt, and high heels. ‘I guess I am. Do you have anything I can borrow?’

‘Sure.’ Kara bounds off in the direction of her bedroom.

Lena kicks off her heels and sets them and her bag by the door. The apartment smells of the cinnamon candles burning on a the dining table. The window is open and a crisp autumn breeze brings with it the smells of rain and fallen leaves.

When Kara comes back, Lena looks up to find her eyes at the same height as the other woman’s lips. She quickly moves her gaze up to Kara’s eyes, heat creeping up to her cheeks. She never realized Kara is quite a bit taller than her. It makes her like Kara even more.

‘This okay?’ Kara asks, holding up a National City University sweatshirt. ‘Do you also want to borrow some trousers?’

‘This is perfect.’ Lena pulls the sweater over her head, inhaling as she does so. Kara must’ve worn it recently, because it smells like her perfume.

Everything for their pumpkin carving is set up on the coffee table: pumpkins, knifes, and a large bowl for the trash. The tv is on in the background, a 24/7 news channel with the volume too low for Lena, but she’s sure Kara can hear it just fine. She makes herself comfortable on the floor while Kara gets their drinks. When Kara isn’t looking, she carefully lifts her pumpkin off the table. It’s not as heavy as it looks, but she wouldn’t be able to carry two at the same time.

‘You ready?’ Kara asks, as she hands Lena her glass of wine.

‘So ready. Where do I start?’

Kara is a good and patient teacher; Lena soon has her pumpkin open and its guts out. She’s outlining the face when disaster strikes, literally. She catches Kara glancing at the tv, then at the window, her knife hovering over her pumpkin. Lena follows Kara’s gaze to the tv. There’s a pile up on an off-ramp into the city. Firemen are trying to get to the cars in the middle, but fuel is leaking and small fire are starting everywhere. There’s a good chance they won’t get everyone out in time.

‘Kara, it’s okay. Go.’

‘What? What are you talking about?’ Kara splutters. ‘That’s like ten miles from here. CatCo will already have someone on the scene.’

‘You’re really not that great a liar,’ Lena says.

‘I totally am!

‘It’s a compliment.’ Lena puts her hand on Kara’s, squeezes, and nods. ‘They need your help to get those people out. I’ll be here when you get back.’

Indecision flashes across Kara’s face, then she nods and is gone.

Lena keeps her eyes on the screen, pride blooming inside her as she watches Kara arrive and rip apart cars to get people out. When the last person is safe, Kara untangle the cars to make sure all the fires are out. She stays until she’s sure all danger has passed, then, high-fiving some of the firemen, Kara makes her way out of the crowd and jumps into the sky.

Lena pulls her eyes away from the excited reporter now on the screen, to the window to watch for Kara’s arrival. She’s seen Supergirl fly dozens of times, but there’s something very intimate about being here as Kara flies back into her own home, cape fluttering behind her, the soft thud of her boots on the floor.

‘Are you mad?’ Kara blurts out the moment she touches down.

‘For what?’ Lena asks, confused.

‘For not telling you.’

‘Of course not,’ Lena assures her. ‘You think I haven’t thought of changing my name, or never wished I could make people stop thinking of me as a Luthor the moment I step out of the office? It would make life a lot easier.’

‘Trust me, it doesn’t,’ Kara says with a wry smile, dropping down beside her on the floor, pulling her cape into her lap.

‘No, I suppose it doesn’t.’

They lean back against the couch, and when Lena turns her head, she finds Kara already looking at her.

‘Especially in the romance department,’ Kara says. Her eyes slip down to Lena’s lips for a moment, and Lena’s heart starts beating a little faster. ‘When do I tell them I’m Supergirl?’ Kara continues. ‘Will they be mad if I wait too long? What if I tell too soon and we break up and they tell everyone?’

Lena slides her hand in Kara’s. ‘What if they figure it out by themselves?’

‘That makes things a lot easier actually,’ Kara says, squeezing her hand.

They lean in at the same time. Kara smells a little like smoke and gasoline, but Lena doesn’t mind, because Kara’s lips are soft against hers.

When they pull back Lena says, ‘Shall we get on with tonight’s activity?’

‘What?’ Kara’s eyes widen, sliding down Lena’s body before pulling them back up with a blush and a smirk pulling at the corner of her mouth.

‘I’m talking about the pumpkin carving,’ Lena says. ‘But other activities can be added to itinerary.’

Kara chuckles. ‘Let me get changed and help you carve the eyes. They can be tricky.’

Before Lena can answer, Kara is gone, and already back by her side in the clothes she was wearing earlier. Lena picks up her knife, puts it against the skin of the pumpkin. Kara grabs her own pumpkin and knife to show her what to do. It’s not exactly like her fantasy, but as she catches Kara’s smile from the corner of her eye, Lena thinks this is much better.

[hamimagines]

Amazingly Good (Daveed Diggs x Reader)

Masterlist

Request Queue

Warnings- Reader is trans and if that bothers you please unfollow me, mentions of gender/body dysphoria etc etc etc 

Request- “Can you do a Daveed x reader (before he left Ham and after Lin Left) where reader is Trans (FtM) and is the New Alex and is really scared to dress in front of anyone, then like Daveed acadently walks in on reader changing and like, totally supports him, slight comfort/fluff? Maybe later they are cuddling and Anthony or Renee see it? (AGHHH I LOVE YOUR BLOG BTW)”

A/N- (I am not transgender and I’ve only ever experienced super super mild gender dysphoria so if any of this is like WILDLY inaccurate, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE message and I’ll fix it ASAP

Do y’all know how hard it is to find out stuff about training new broadway cast members? It took me like eight searched before I found a decent playbill article rip)

Song-  Words -- Daya

Words- 2,377

You walked in nervously patting your chest. It was a habit you had formed after the top surgery you’d gotten so you wouldn’t have to bind for the rest of your life. It was calming to you, to feel the smooth flat planes that you could now consider your own body. It had been such a freeing moment, so at times like this, where you heart felt like it was going to beat out of your aesthetically pleasing chest, it was nice to remember those moments. 

You’d been more than just surprised or shocked when you got the role. Audition after audition with little recognition. You loved what you did, and you never minded being a chorus member, but you always wanted more. Not necessarily more fame or more money, just more life.

So when you auditioned for Hamilton you didn’t expect much to come from it. It was the biggest show on Broadway right now, and you were gunning for the main role. That phone call had been the most exciting, terrifying, and vomit-inducing call of your life. 

But now you were here, standing in front of the Richard Rogers theater. You had been rehearsing one of with the musical directors and dance captains, but today was your first practice with other cast members. You only had a few more weeks before Lin left for good and the role of Alexander Hamilton was left completely in your hands, so you really needed to start working. 

The sky was started to drizzle and soak the hair that you’d grown out for the role, but you didn’t mind. You just wanted to live in the moment. The nerves and excitement, the uncertainty and expectations, you wanted all of it. 

You closed your eyes and brought your hand back up to your chest, right over your heart. “Dreams do come true.” you whispered. 

“Hell yeah, they do.” You jumped at the sudden voice. “Oh! Oh my god, I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to scare you.” You turned to see a tall man with wild hair, wearing a hoodie and a yellow backpack. Daveed Diggs. “Agh, you were probably having a moment and I totally ruined it.” 

You quickly wiped some of the rain off you face. “No! It’s okay, I was just...yeah I was having moment actually.” You laughed nervously. 

Tell him your name. Tell him your name. Tell him who you are! 

You stuck your hand out quickly. “I-I’m Y/N L/Y/N. The new-” 

“The new Alex.” he confirmed. “I’m Daveed.” He took your hand and shook it lightly. You strained yourself not to cringe as you realized people never shake hands anymore, and yours were probably all sweaty anyway. 

“Well as much as I’m a fan of your dreams coming true, Y/N, if we stay out here any longer we’ll both get colds and since we need our voices for our jobs, we should probably head inside.” 

“Oh, I never get sick.” you said quickly, instantly regretting it. 

Daveed cocked his head. “Okay...well, I’m gonna go inside.” 

“Yeah! Yeah, I’ll come too.” You hurried behind him. The two of you walked past the security guards, not a word exchanged between you. You were internally punching yourself in the face for sounded so stuck-up and rude or just weird. 

You looked up from the ground and saw Daveed looking at you expectantly. “Sorry, what?” You felt a blush start to rise.

“Do you know where you’re going?” Daveed must have seen your slightly offended face because he quickly added, “I only ask because you’re kinda following me into my dressing room.” 

“Oh!” You took a step back. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry!” 

“No, it’s okay! I was just wondering if you needed help. You can chill with me for a while if you want.”  Daveed had an easy smile on my face. 

“No! No I’ll be fine. I’ll just...find Amber or Scott...or something.” 

You searched around the theater for awhile until you finally found a face you recognized. Scott, the stage manager, introduced you to the chorus members and as soon as Alex got there you were all thrust into vocal exercises. 

While you and the others were warming up, your mind started to wander to Daveed. He wasn’t warming up with everyone else. He had to have known that you were starting by now. And you didn’t see any other main cast members there, only understudies. If wasn’t here for this rehearsal, what was he doing here? You tried to shake the thought out. He probably just forgot his jacket or something. You didn’t need to think about him, or the way he smiled, so damn much. 

Once everyone’s voice was warmed up. You were thrown into the start of the musical. It was scary at first, knowing that everyone else there was watching you because they all knew what to do, and you didn’t. Your mind was racing with all the things you had to remember. High tones, fast raps, long notes, entrances, exits, dance steps, props, it was all clouding your head. But once you were at the start of the second song, things started to come more naturally. Any time you messed up, someone would kindly correct you, and you did it again until you got it right. It was hard, but fun. It was everything you hoped for. 

Everyone was taking a twenty-minute break before you started working through the Alex parts in Act Two. You were drinking out of your water bottle like it was the only thing you lived for. Some dribbled down your neck and onto the front of your tank top, but it hardly mattered considering how much your sweating at the moment. 

“Hey, you did really good.” 

You almost choked on your water at the sound of his voice. “Really well.” was all you managed to get out. 

Daveed chuckled and shoved his hands in his pockets. “You’re right. You did...amazing. Amazingly?” 

You shrugged and nodded. “Thanks. It’s...intense, but you probably know that.”

“Well...it seems like I’m not your only admirer.” You followed his gaze to a group of chorus girls who were talking quietly and looking over their shoulders every once in awhile. 

You laughed nervously. “No, no. I think they’re staring at you.” 

“What? No. You’re a way better-looking guy than men.” 

You stared up at Daveed with your mouth wide open. “You’re kidding right?”

Daveed furrowed his brow and shook his head very seriously. “You’re like...jacked! You are very attractive, trust me.” The words died in the air. You felt like you were about to choke. You couldn’t believe you’d actually just said that to him.

But then he smiled. A big, cheesy smile. “Thanks, but I still think you look better. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have walked here just to see you rehearse.”

“That’s why you came to the theater today?”

“Of course! Almost nothing came up when I googled you so I just had to see what you were all about.”

A grin to match his slowly started to spread across your face. Then Scott called everyone back to stage.

Rehearsal went...good. Amazingly. You were picking the steps up better than you thought, and you really appreciated how nobody expected you to be a carbon-copy of Lin. Even Lin himself said so. They gave you the chance to make the role your own, and you really started to feel like Alex.

That is until the night before your first show. You were watching Daveed and Lin do Cabinet Battle #1 from far off stage. It was Lin’s last show, and you had a tough act to follow.

You were so lost in your anxious thoughts that you didn’t even notice Daveed waving his hands in front of your face until his clapped in your ear.

“What’s up?” he mouthed. You shrugged. Daveed’s face contorted and he took your arm, pulling you away from the stage. You’d gotten to know the whole cast by now, but you and Daveed had become especially close.

He brought you all the way up to his dressing room and turned to quickly. “What’s up, man?”

“I don’t know. I’m just...intimidated,” you admitted.

“By what?”

“Everything.” you said plainly. “The fans. The audience. The directors. Lin.”

“Lin?”

“They love him! They applaud everything he does and I’m nothing.”

Daveed grabbed your shoulders. “You are not nothing.”

“I didn’t mean it like-”

“No.” He cut you off. You were stunned into silence. “You are not nothing. You are gonna do great. People we love you. Maybe even more than they love Lin. Hamilton isn’t just Lin’s role. It’s your too now.” You closed your eyes slowly and nodded. “Okay?” Daveed asked.

“Okay.” you whispered. Daveed quickly but you in for a hug. Not a bro hug. Not a “no homo” hug. A pressed up against him, feel his heartbeat hug. You leaned into the comforting warmth.

“You’ve praticed. You know this. It’s gonna be great. You’ll do g- well.”

You chuckled. “You better go. If I make you miss your cue, they might fire me.”

“Well, we definitely don’t want that.” Daveed winked and stepped away from you. He held his hand out. You stared down at it for a moment before raising an eyebrow at him. He just looked at you. You took it carefully and the two of you walked all the way back down to the stage. You walked past Anthony, who gave you a quizzical look.

Daveed stepped away to take position for his next entrance. Anthony was not subtle at all with the way he practically ran over to you.

“Dude, what was that?” His tone wasn’t judgemental but definitely shocked. You shrugged and smiled. Anthony’s eyes widened and nodded with an approving look.

After the show that night, you had a good talk with Lin in the dressing room that was soon to be occupied by one less person. He gave you some of the best advice you thought you’d ever received and assured you that he’d always be there to help whenever you needed him.

A huge party was being thrown for Lin, Pippa, and Leslie, so when Lin eventually left you started to change from your casual clothes into something more party appropriate.

You were halfway through changing when you heard a knock on the door. You started to shout that you were busy, but the door was already open by the time you turned around.

Daveed was standing in the doorway. You quickly grabbed your T-shirt from the floor and held it over your chest, but it wasn’t quick enough.

“Y/N?”

“I-”

“What are those scars from/”

You held the shirt tighter to your chest. “I- I, uh...” He stepped closer to you and moved your hands away. Reluctantly you let him.

“They look so fresh...”

“Two years, six months, and four days ago.”

Daveed’s eyes from your chest to meet your gaze. “I don’t think I understand.”

You sighed and stepped away. You put your T-shirt back on and faced him. “You should maybe sit down...if you want.”

Daveed nodded and sat on the couch. You paced slightly before stopping in front of him.

“I...uh,” More pacing. “I...used to be a girl. I...I’m trans.” you said. It felt so weird saying it. You didn’t know why. You just preferred people to think of you as an average guy, and you didn’t know how others might react.

Whatever you expected, a sigh of relief was not it. “Oh that’s what the surgery was for. I thought you were like dying or something.”

“I...no?”

“Why didn’t you tell anyone?”

You looked down. “People haven’t always been the kindest about it, I guess.”

Daveed frowned and patted the spot on the couch next to him. The moment you sat down he laid a hand on your thigh. “I’m sorry that must have been so hard for you.”

“Yeah...You’d think I’d get used to the comments but, guess not.”

“What the fuck kinda shit are people saying?”

You laughed slightly at his sudden anger. Anthony and Jasmine appeared in the doorway.

“Hey everyone’s leaving. You guys coming?” Jasmine asked.

“Yeah we’ll be there in a bit. Go ahead without us.” Daveed replied.

“Mhmm. Take you time.” Anthony smirked and started to pull a confused Jasmine away.

Daveed turned to you unphased. “Talk to me.”

You opened up to him. Slowly at first, but after a bit. He didn’t even need to prompt you. You told him your entire story. Even things unrelated to your gender. You told him everything. You’d never told anyone everything. It was nice to get things off your chest, metaphorically and literally.

You didn’t even notice how late you and Daveed were talking until your eyelids started to droop like tree sap.

You woke up groggily to a concerned voice.

“Where are they? Did they get lost? I can’t even believe we didn’t notice they never showed up.”

“Relax, they’re probably fine.” Another voice said.

You were confused. Was this your house? You heard a door open abruptly, and you finally opened your eyes. You were laying on the couch with your shoulders against the arm rest. Daveed’s arms were wrapped around your torso and his head was resting against your stomach. His legs dangled awkwardly off the couch. You started to move away, but Daveed held tight and slowly opened his eyes.

“Oh hey guys.” he said casually.

“Oh...hey.” Renee stared from your face to his.

“Oh, we’re definitely talking about this later, Diggs.” Anthony stated.

Daveed shrugged and laid his head back down on you.