#she kinda looks taken aback and then just smiles sadly if you pick that option

[myrfing]

GIRL WHAT DID YOU THINK I WAS GONNA SAY LMFAO SURVIVAL? WAT IN THE WORLD DO YOU NEED TO BE MERGING THREE HEADED DOGS INTO PEOPLE FOR

[amazingphanisnotonfire-imagines]

Kevin//Surprises

Request: Hi do you take requests?? If you do can you do a Kevin Keller x male reader smut. Please. You can pick the story line.

Warning: Badly written smut. This is my first time (lol) writing male x male smut, so ya know. I’m sorry

The bass of the music makes you shrink into yourself as you approach the front door. You’re not usually seen at parties, but apparently a certain sheriffs son was going to be here, so you decided to check it out. 

The crush that you’d been harboring for Kevin had grown over the past year, until it was a fully grown, every time you looked at him your heart skipped a beat and you felt dizzy kinda thing. You just couldn’t get him out of your head, and you were hoping that if you saw him tonight, he might take more notice in you. 

You weren’t particularly that high up on the high school popularity chain, whereas he was. You figured if he saw you at a party, he might think a bit more highly of you and it would give you guys something to talk about. Seeing as though the only time you ever crossed paths was in class, where he didn’t seem to acknowledge your existence. However you were hyper aware of his.

He was cute, smart, funny and out. 

And you were the opposite of all of those. 

So maybe tonight wasn’t the best idea, but you were here now and so there was no going back. You placed the beer that you’d stolen from your dad on the kitchen counter before deciding to brave the living room.

Wow, there are a lot of people here. You thought.

Everybody is either dancing, drinking or getting high. And there’s a few people making out/dry humping each other on the makeshift dance floor. Which is really just a white rug. Whoever owns this house is gonna be so pissed when they come back. But then, what did they expect when leaving a teenager alone for the weekend. 

Looking around the room, your eyes stop on a couple right in the corner that seem to be enjoying the party a lot more than everybody else. Especially because she has a hand down his jeans. 

“Y/n?” Kevin’s confused voice distracts you from the weird sight in front of you and for a second you’re relieved. Until your not.

“What?” You ask, rather abruptly as you turn around. Kevin looks slight taken aback at your tone and you instantly feel bad. “I mean, yeah?” 

“What are you doing here?” He asks and raises an eyebrow.

“Errrr, drinking?” You reply and hold up your cup. There’s nothing in it at the minute, seeing as though the kitchen was too busy to actually get a drink, but somebody handed you it and you kinda forgot to put it down. You were using it as your shield. 

“No, I mean-” He starts before cutting himself off and taking a deep breath. “Its just I’ve never seen you at any of these.” 

“I’m full of surprises.” You wink and he laughs softly before Betty shouts for him across the room. 

“I’ll talk to you later.” He touches your arm gently and you have to stop your breath from hitching. 

“Yeah-h. Okay.” You stutter. Apparently your new found confidence was short lived. But more importantly, Kevin knew who you were! He knew that you didn’t go to parties! Which actually may be a bad thing because he knows that you didn’t go to parties, which means you’re not invited to them, which means he is way out of your league and now your spiraling. 

“Okay.” You take a deep breath. What do people do at parties? You asked yourself. They drink. Thats easy, the kitchen seems less busy so thats a good place to start.

You push your way through the crowd and thankfully the kitchen is less busy than it was when you arrived. You pour yourself a drink and decide what to do next. You could dance, but you look kinda weird if your dancing alone. You could join in with a party game but everyone has already coupled up for beer pong and there is no way you’re playing truth or dare. Maybe you should just stay in the kitchen. It seems safe for now and it’ll give you a chance to decide what to do. Plus, hopefully Kevin might get a drink and your confidence might come back. 

“Hey.” A girl slurs as she walks in and you half smile at her. 

“Hi.” You reply awkwardly. Its the girl from before and when her hand brushes yours, you hope to god she’s washed them. 

“Do you wanna have sex?” She asks bluntly and you blink at her. 

“Errrr.” 

“Come on, there’s plenty of empty rooms.” She continues and leans against you.

“I’m good, thanks.” You try and shake her off but she clutches you tighter. 

“Don’t you think I’m pretty?” She asks sadly and you shake your head. 

“No. You are pretty.” You reply and she smiles brightly at you. “You’re just not my type.” You add and she looks at you confused. 

“Oh.” She thinks about it for a moment and you take this as your chance to leave. Maybe the kitchen wasn’t the best option. Hopefully upstairs will be better. 

The stairs are overcrowded with people and you can’t help but wonder why people would chose to hang out on a staircase. Especially drunk people. It can’t be safe especially if its dark. 

Once you’ve made it past them you stop at the top and look around. On one side there was a surprisingly empty bathroom and for a second you think about how bad it would be to hide in there until it was an acceptable time to leave. But then you realized how stupid that was, tonight you were going to brave (even though you were looking for an empty room to hide in for a while. but that was only so you could think) so you walked the other way. 

“Hey!” You heard someone shouting down the corridor. “Y/n!” They continued to shout and you realized it was Kevin. Okay, just breathe.

“Hi!” You turned around and smiled at him. “Are you following me?” You asked, raising an eyebrow. 

“What?” He shook his head quickly. “No. I err, I just. Fuck it.” He shrugged and cupped your face, smashing his lips to yours. Your eyes widened for a second before your brain caught up with what was actually happening and you kissed him back, just as forcefully. 

“Holy fuck.” You mumble breathlessly. 

“What?” He asks and pulls away from you, worry is evident in his tone and your heart aches. 

“I just can’t believe this is happening.” You reply quietly and he quirks an eyebrow. 

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing.” You shake your head and kiss him again. His hands move to your hips and holds you against the wall. The noise from downstairs is drowned out as he bites your lip and you part your lips slightly. He takes the opportunity to deepen the kiss and the two of you fight before you eventually give in. One of your hands is cupping his cheek, while the other is at the base of his neck, pulling his hair slightly. He groans and the sound goes straight to your dick. “I think there’s an empty bedroom around here somewhere.” 

“Sure.” He nods, agreeing to the silent question you asked. He pulls away from you and grabs your hand pulling you further down the corridor until he stops in front of a room. He looks around before pushing the handle down and opening the door. He smiles at you after switching the light on and the two of you walk in. As soon as the door is closed your pushed against it and he’s kissing you again. One of his hands travels down your chest, stopping just above the waistband of your jeans and your breath hitches. 

“How’d you know there’d be an empty room?” He asks against your lips. 

“A girl told me after she asked for sex.” You reply and he stops kissing you. 

“What?” 

“Never-mind.” You shake your head and kiss him quickly. He seems to forget about the conversation you were just having because he kisses you back. You guide him to the bed without breaking the kiss, and you have to say you’re kinda impressed with yourself. Once Kevin’s legs hit the mattress you both end up falling and the two of you can’t help but giggle. 

You kiss from his jaw to his neck leaving a few marks, forcing breathy moans to leave his lips. 

“Take your shirt off.” You tell him and he looks at you amused. 

“Wow, you are full of surprises. I didn’t expect you to be bossy, especially in the bedroom.” He teases and you roll your eyes. 

“Don’t make me ask again Keller.” You warn.

“Fine.” He replies and takes his shirt off. You take your own off while he’s busy, but he grabs it and throws it in the corner of the room, along with his own. You push him back onto the bed and kiss down his chest, stopping just above his jeans. The bulge in his pants is prominent and you can’t help the smirk on your lips as you ghost your lips over it. He looks down at you with a warning look in his eyes and you grin. 

“You’re cute.” You mumble against his skin.  

“Shut up.” He mutters and you smile. 

“Make me.” You quirk an eyebrow and he rolls his eyes before pushing your head down. Your fingers play with his belt before you quickly undo it and pull his jeans off, throwing them in the general direction of your shirts. Your fingers trace the outline of his cock and he breaths slowly. 

“Quit teasing.” He groans.

“Fineee.” You tease and pull his boxers down, throwing them across the room. His dick springs up and your eyes widen. You press a kiss to the tip and swirl your tongue around it, collecting some pre-cum. 

“Y/nnnnn.” He whines and you decided to put him out of his misery. Taking him in your mouth, you bop your head up and down, slowly at first and he moves underneath you. His hands go to your hair and he pulls making you moan around him. He bucks his hips up and your hands go to his thighs to pin him to the bed before you deep throat him and he moans loudly. You continue to change from normal to deep-throating until he pulls on your hair. 

Sitting up, you smile at him and he returns it. Until suddenly the look on his face darkens and he sits up and crawls towards you. 

“What are you doing?” You ask confused and he kisses you. 

“I’m about to surprise you.” He mumbles against your lips before flipping you over. He rests back on his ankles and quickly pulls your jeans down, throwing them next to the bed. He kisses up and down your thighs and you wiggle underneath him causing him to laugh. He finally stops where you need him most and presses a kiss to your clothed member. 

“Kevin.” You whisper and close your eyes. He laughs before taking your boxers down. You kick them off the bed before kissing him again. He spits on his palm before slowly wrapping it around your base and moving it up and down. His other hand plays with your balls and your a moaning mess beneath him. 

However he quickly stops and you open your eyes. 

“What the fuck?” You ask annoyed. 

“Turn around.” He tells you, and you don’t think you’ve ever moved as fast. Your on your hands and knees before he can even finish his sentence. 

“Someone’s desperate.” He mocks. 

“You followed me up here, remember?” You reply and look behind you. 

“Oh, is that how we’re gonna be?” He asks sarcastically before tracing his finger around your hole. He dips a finger in, luckily there was still some spit (and pre-cum) on it so it was more pleasurable than painful. You moan and he quickly removes his finger.

He spits in his palm one more time and starts moving his hand up and down his dick, small moans leaving his lips. While he does this, he spreads some of his spit on and around your hole before he slides into you and the two of you sigh in relief. 

“Fuck you’re tight.” He says breathlessly and you whine. He gives you a minute to adjust before you nod and he starts to move. He starts slowly, but his pace quickens, the louder your moans become and you’re both glad the music from downstairs is too loud. 

“Fuck.” Kevin groans. 

“Faster.” You moan and his thrusts speed up. 

“You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting to do this.” He whispers and your heart flutters. 

“Me too.” You say in between moans and he smiles. 

“You’re so hot.” 

“Shit!” He angles his hips up and you practically shout. His thrusts continue to get faster and soon the two of you are close. “I’m gonna cum.” He moans. 

“Me too.” You reply and his thrusts become deeper, sending you over the edge. 

“Fuck, shit. Kevin!” You moan loudly. His hips stutter and you feel him come inside you. A string of curse words leave his mouth before he stills. He pulls out before collapsing next to you. The two of you stare at the ceiling for a while, until your breathing has calmed down, before he looks at you and rests his head on your chest. You shyly put your arm around him and you can’t help but smile at the irony. You’re feeling nervous about cuddling him, after he just fucked you at a party. 

“Do you have any other surprises?” He asks and looks up at you. 

“You’ll just have to wait and see.” You smirk. “Now, round two?” 

[calpalirwin]

According to Plan

A/N: It’s the finale y’all!

And away, and away we go!

~~~

Chapter 15

Madison

~~~

It felt so good to have Ashton back. I think we were both a little taken aback by the ease we each felt- as if nothing had ever changed.

I watched from the porch as he chased Jude around the backyard, like he had never not done it.

“I hope you like mac and cheese and chicken tenders. I don’t get to make anything more sophisticated these days,” I told him later, after he agreed to stay for dinner.

He let out a small laugh. “It’s fine.”

I smiled. I loved being able to hear his voice and his laugh. Jude had his same laugh: a little high-pitched giggle. I loved that. My boys. 

Jude came running into the kitchen, cutting off anymore conversation.

The dinner conversation consisted of Jude rambling about his toddler adventures, with me stepping in to correct his wording (for all of our benefit) or provide more detail for Ashton. His told Ashton about how his favorite animal was a dinosaur, especially the raptor from that one movie (Jurassic World, I told Ashton) even if it was a little scary (Nightmares, I winced at the memories). And of course, they both talked about soccer.

After dinner, I sent Jude down the hall to pick the pajamas he wanted to wear after his bath. He ran off and came back with soccer pants and a dinosaur shirt. “That’s what you want to wear?” I asked, as Ashton and I tried not to laugh at the clearly clashing attire.

“Yep!” was the hearty reply.

I shrugged and went to get his bath ready. We sat in the hallway outside the bathroom as he splashed around in the water. “I��ve missed this,” I said, almost sadly after a quick peek on our son.

“Bath time?” Ashton asked, incredulously.

“No,” I shook my head. “This. You. Doing everyday things with you. I didn’t know how much I missed it until now.”

He wrapped his arm around me and kissed my head. “I’ve missed it, too.”

“God, I love being able to hear you,” I said, leaning into him.

“Me too.”

After a few more splashes in the bathroom and stolen kisses in the hallway, I got Jude out of the tub and into bed. 

Ashton leaned in the doorway as I crawled into Jude’s bed with him, and grabbed a book. I read the book to Jude as his eyelids grew heavy with sleep, using a different voice for every character. When I finished, I closed the book, and looked at him, already asleep. “Night, Judder-bug. Momma loves you,” I whispered, kissing him and then carefully making my way out of the room. I flicked on a nightlight and turned off his lamp before gently closing the door behind her.

“You’re an amazing mom,” Ashton told me, kissing me softly.

“You caught us on a good day,” I whispered, kissing him back.

We made our way to the living room. “Do you want something to drink?” I asked. “I think Mike has a case of beer. Or do you still not drink?”

He laughed, “Beer’s fine.”

I disappeared for a minute and came back with two bottles. I handed one to him and took a sip of mine. “There used to be a time when you didn’t like to drink,” I remembered.

He shrugged and took a swig, wincing. “Still not my favorite, but I’ll have a beer every now and then. What about you? I didn’t take you for a drinker.”

“I’m not,” I said, taking another drink. “It’s root beer,” I laughed at my joke. He looked at his label as I continued to laugh. “Yours is real,” I told him, “don’t worry.”

He laughed with me, there in the dark, as we each drank our drinks. “So, I’ve been thinking,” he said, as he finished up his beer, spinning the bottle in his palm. “I want a relationship. With Jude obviously, but you as well. We didn’t end on a bad note, hell we barely ended at all. So, if you’re willing, I want to at least try to be a family.”

“I’ve waited a long time for you to say those words, and to actually hear them.” I told him, putting my bottle down.

“I told you I’d always love you,” he shrugged.

“You also promised you’d find someone who made you happy.”

“I did. I found two people who make me happy, actually.”

“Okay,” I smiled at him. “If that’s what you want, sure.”

“It’s not a matter of what I want. It’s a matter of what I need.” He pulled me into his lap and was about to kiss me, when Jude came into the room, tears in his eyes

“Judder-bug,” I said, getting out of Ashton’s lap and going to him. “What’s wrong?”

He pushed me away and crawled into Ashton’s lap. Without a second thought, Ashton wrapped Jude in his arms and started rubbing his back. “Shh,” I heard him soothe, “it’s okay, bud, I’m here. You’re safe, I got you.” Ashton continued to rub Jude’s back and soothe him as Jude’s cries subsided and he fell back asleep.

“Does that happen a lot?” he asked me after he had carried Jude back to bed and kissed him goodnight and he curled up next to me on the couch. 

“Sometimes,” I admitted. “More so now since we moved. He’s still getting used to having his own room. That was the quickest I’ve seen him calm down.”

“Yeah?”

I nodded against me. “I thought because he was still young, that not having you around wouldn’t make much of a difference. But, I guess sometimes you just need your dad. I’m really sorry I kept you in the dark.”

“It’s okay,” he said, kissing me. “We’re together now, that’s all that matters.”

We talked well into the night. I told him how I had found steady work at a local photo studio, so I was staying put. He told me he had steady work at the shop with his dad. We debated about whether it made more sense for us to find our own place or if he should just move in with me. We ultimately decided that he would move in, because Mike was still planning on moving out. “I know it’s not the apartment at Duke we always talked about,” I said.

“No, it isn’t,” he admitted, laughing. “It’s way better.”

When we finally made it to my room, we still didn’t sleep, both of us too busy making up for lost time.

Ashton slowly moved in over the course of the week, while Mike slowly moved out. Throughout the week, while Ashton formed a bond with Jude, Ashton and I reformed ours. Both of us were glad to see that the love was still there. Friday night, it was just the three of us, our small little family. We laughed as we went to bed that night, still in a daze at how fast our lives had changed.

~~~

Chapter 16

Ashton

~~~

A week after Madison and I found each other in that diner, I decided it was time to take her and Jude to my parents’ house. My family knew that we were back together and I had given up my apartment to move in with her, but I still hadn’t told them about Jude. I didn’t want them to react badly, so I was nervous as we drove over there for lunch.

“Not Nana and Papa’s,” Jude said as we pulled into the driveway.

“No, it’s not,” Madison agreed. “It’s Daddy’s parents’ house.”

Jude frowned. His face said everything I was feeling- that this could all go horribly wrong.

I knocked on the front door before letting myself in, closing the door behind Jude and Madison. “Hey, I’m here!” I announced as we made our way to the kitchen where my mom and sister were.

“Ash!” my mom exclaimed coming to hug me, like she didn’t see me practically every day.

“Hey, Mom. You remember Madison,” I said.

“Of course. Madison, it’s so good to see you,” she smiled.

Madison nodded politely.

“Madison, you remember my sister, Lauren,” I introduced.

“You’re so much older now!” Madison marveled. It was true, Lauren was only 10 when Madison first met her. Now Lauren was going to be a sophomore in high school.

Mom and Lauren looked at me questioningly. Madison noticed and explained. “I got the Cochlear implant a few years ago. It’s working very well.”

Mom and Lauren smiled, happy for her. “And who’s this?” my mom asked, crouching down next to Jude.

“This is Jude,” I explained, “our son.”

In complete southern charm, my mother’s eyes went wide and she chose her words carefully, to hide her surprise and probable anger. ”Lauren, why don’t you take Madison and Jude outside so Jude can play,” my mom smiled, as my sister eagerly took Jude’s hand and went outside, Madison following after them.

“A son, Ash?” my mother whispered furiously as she walked out of the kitchen and towards my dad’s office. “That boy… you saw fit not to tell us?”

“It’s a complicated story, Mom,” I said, following her.

“You best get to explaining yourself,” she said, rapping on the door and walking into the office.

“Oh, Ash! Good, you’re he- wait, what’s going on?” my dad asked, once he took a good look at my mom’s face.

“Oh, wait’ll you hear this,” my mom tsked.

I rolled my eyes. “Remember how I said I got 2 messages from Madison right after I left for Duke? Turns out she was pregnant.”

“Pregnant? And she…?”

“Yeah. I have a son, Dad.”

“How long have you known?” came the obvious, but incredibly stupid question.

“Not that long, obviously. I never messaged her back. I found out last week when I found her at the diner.”

“So, she didn’t see fit to tell you for four years?”

“She knew I wouldn’t have stayed at Duke if I’d known. She didn’t want me to give up Duke for her. Especially since I kinda dumped her for it, y’know.”

“And you’re sure he’s yours?”

I clenched my hands into fists and screwed my eyes shut, trying to control my anger. Of all people, my dad should understand what I was going through. And he had the audacity to ask if Jude was mine? Of course he was mine. 1.) Madison would never do something like and 2.) Jude looked just like I did at that age. I unclenched my fists and opened my eyes again as I started talking. “Did it ever matter that I’m not biologically yours? No. You raised me like your own. I’m doing the same thing. Look, I’m not asking for your support or permission. She’s the only girl I ever loved, and he’s my son- biologically and otherwise, trust me- There’s no option where I’m not with them anymore; there’s no option where I don’t love them with all I have. You taught me that.”

My mom and dad smiled at me, my dad not-so-stealthily wiping at his eyes. “Alright,” he choked out. “Let’s go meet…”

“Jude,” my mom told him. “Our grandson’s name is Jude.”

~~~

Epilogue

Madison

May 2025

~~~

“Get the bubbles, look!” I heard Ashton say from the back porch as he blew more bubbles. It still took my breath away every time I heard his voice. It was just as I had always pictured- just as good as he looked.

“Bubbles!” our daughter cheered as she tried to catch them in her little hands.

“Look, Savannah,” Jude told her, blowing a big bubble for his little sister.

Her green eyes danced and her brown curls bounced as she twirled around in childlike wonder. “Momma, look!” she told me, spotting me in the doorway.

“I see,” I answered, sitting down with them.

“Hey,” Ashton smiled, wrapping his arm around me.

“Hey,” I smiled back, leaning into him and breathing him in. A marriage and a second child later, and I still couldn’t get over the amazement. After all these years, I still felt as safe in his arms as I did for the first time at seventeen.

We sat there on the porch, watching our kids play with reckless abandon. “Did you ever think we’d make it this far?” he whispered.

“You and our family are the best things I never planned for.”

[bangtan-spells]

Jungkook Scenario: Come Into My Heart.

Request: Hey! Can I have an one shot about jungkook which is kinda neglecting (Y/N) because he is too busy with work and she blames herself that she is not good enough and all that so she is really sad because of that? I would be the happiest person in the World if you could do that, but if you can't I can understand :) btw Sorry if I sent this in twice but I didn't know if it was really sent 😅

Genre: Angst / Romance

–I’m sorry I couldn’t make it – Jungkook kissed those words on your left shoulder, he had sneaked behind you on the bed, placing his arm around your waist and waking you up.

You nodded already resigned, you didn’t even think he was spending the night with you after waiting for him practically the entire day, a day that was especial to you, you had just gotten a promotion and you wanted to celebrate it with a lunch, your closest friends were there and Jungkook said he was going, so you waited for him over two hours until you felt ashamed with your friends. You’d barely touched your food and Jungkook didn’t answer any message or call, you’d felt horrible then and you thought that by now you would feel less unease,  it should be well past midnight and the heavy weight inside your chest was still latent. This wasn’t the first time it happened and each new time you thought that he was going to notice how you were missing him more, how he was losing all the special dates, how little details between you seemed to be forgotten, how you were feeling his absence; it was as if the only one having a relationship there was you.

–What happened? – you asked in a whisper, turning around to face him in the dim light of your bedroom.

–Just… work, I got caught, you know– Jungkook’s eyes were closed, he spoke as if he didn’t want to be repeating himself and you felt a tinge of pain. Yes, you knew, but you’d thought this time was going to be different after you said how much you wanted his presence there. You leaned forward and kissed his lips softly, he kissed you back, but not for long. –I’m tired babe –

Jungkook slurred the words, resting his arm on his forehead. He was lying there shirtless and gorgeous and if you weren’t feeling so cold and filled with doubts then you would insist a bit more, kiss him again, caress his body that you knew by heart and tell him to relax, that you could do the rest; if Jungkook was the same one he’d been before with you then you would, but you chose to turn around instead and give him your back to ground yourself.

You didn’t want to cry but you were feeling like it. Jungkook and you had barely talked that day, or the day before that, you were seeing him less and less and now when you did he was always tired or with his mind somewhere else, he didn’t even want to touch you now and maybe it were the bottled up feelings of the day but the tears were stinging in your eyes.

Weren’t you worth the effort? Apparently not since it was you the only one making time for him and your relationship.

You stood up from the bed and locked yourself inside the bathroom, looking at your reflection with heavy dark circles and pained eyes filled with tears. You cried then, not even minding if your sobs could be heard outside because your boyfriend was surely already asleep and unaware of everything.

Next morning you woke up to the feeling of Jungkook’s lips on your neck. You brought a hand up to his hair and looked down at him with drowsy eyes. He smirked then, meeting your eyes.

–Morning – he murmured against your neck, moving lower with his lips to your chest, his hands had sneaked under your pajamas and you sighed, you wanted to focus in this moment but your heart wasn’t feeling right.

–I missed you – you whispered, holding back a little whine when Jungkook dragged his teeth over your right ribs.

–But I’m already here –

You wondered for how long, looking at him caressing your body with his hands and lips but the connection wasn’t there, or at least you weren’t feeling it. You bit your lip and tried to will away the daze taking over your mind because of Jungkook and his touches.

–I mean… I missed you yesterday Kook…–

His caresses on you stopped and he looked up. –I wanted to be there Y/N–

–But you weren’t – you couldn’t help the hurt showing in your tone. Jungkook sat up, averting his eyes from yours and running a hand down his face. You covered yourself up with the sheets, feeling cold and unsure, then he sighed, standing up from the bed.

–I told you I was sorry Y/N, I really am – Jungkook looked at you with his hands on his hips and unease breath. –What else should I do? –

You smiled sadly, didn’t he have any idea of how to fix this? It was so easy and clear. 

–Put a little effort maybe? – your voice was tiny and Jungkook stayed silent for too long, so much that you raised your face again to see him, he was standing there looking conflicted and surprised.

–You think I’m not doing it? – you looked down, hating to feel the way you were doing. –I’m trying Y/N, you know how my work is…–

You laughed, but the tears were already streaming down your cheeks and Jungkook didn’t finish what he was saying. –Of course I know, I always know, I always understand, that’s just what I do, don’t I Jungkook? –

You stood up as well, cleaning away a few tears, you were sad, hurt and angry. You wanted to tell him to try harder then, but at the same time you didn’t, you wouldn’t have to tell him that if he cared, you wouldn’t have to be standing there crying, feeling lost and neglected because your boyfriend was at arm length but felt galaxies away.

You shook your head, the silence between you two was ringing in your ears so you walked away from the bedroom, not bothering in looking back at him because if you did you doubted you could keep all the crumbling pieces of yourself together.

  Jungkook’s work was demanding, you knew it, and sometimes you didn’t want to be the overwhelming girlfriend, asking for more and more, but there were certain times that he should care to cherish, that he should think about you and your feelings, or maybe it was just that he didn’t truly care anymore for you.

You surrounded your cup of hot chocolate with your hands and pressed your lips in a tight line. Was it your fault? Maybe you weren’t good enough to him, maybe he didn’t see in you someone he wanted to be with anymore. You felt your lip tremble and pushed the cup away on the table, today was your second anniversary for god’s sake and you were sitting alone in your kitchen because Jungkook was working and couldn’t make any time for you that day.

–Maybe he just doesn’t want to…– you whispered to yourself, looking at your phone’s screen, the wallpaper was a photograph of you two, Jungkook was kissing your lips and everything looked good and lovely, was it that hard to feel like the you in that picture again?

You walked towards your bedroom, this feeling was sickening, you didn’t want to think that everything you had with him was lost but how else could you see it? It seemed like everything else was more important to him than you. You opened the closet and started to take out Jungkook’s clothes with shaking hands and increasing rage, he was going to move there with you but of course he hadn’t had the time for it, he was going around it for over two months.

You tore his shirts from the hangers and threw them all to the floor, he had a few belongings lying around your place and you put yourself to the task of gathering them all and throwing them in a bag and boxes, if you didn’t have a space in his life then why should you keep allowing him one in yours? This hurt too much to do, but you kept going, telling yourself this was the right thing.

When Jungkook arrived to the apartment the next day, the first thing he saw were the boxes with his things next to the door.

–Y/N? – You heard his voice and your heart raced, you heard him walking towards the living room where you were. –Why… why are my things there? –

–I saved you the time to gather them yourself, since you don’t have time for anything – you spoke calmly despite the turmoil inside you. Jungkook looked taken aback for what you said and he smiled confused.

–But…–

–But nothing – you stood up and faced him, standing your ground, not letting yourself waver in front of him just because everything you loved was shattering. –I believe there’s no point to keep pretending that we are something Jungkook–

Your own words were weighing you down, you didn’t want to let this go but it seemed like this was the only option left. Jungkook’s jaw tensed, his whole body did so, he was standing there confused, looking like he couldn’t believe you. You were all dressed up because you were going to run some errands, so you walked past him to pick your purse. 

–Are you trying to tell me that… that we are done? Y/N look at me –

You didn’t, it was best if you didn’t look him in the eyes. You hang your purse on your shoulder and busied yourself with your keys. You couldn’t say that directly because you lacked the strength. 

–What I’m trying to say Jungkook, is that it is best if you take your things with you before I return, please–

–Y/N don’t do this, let’s…– Jungkook had reached for your arm, but his phone rang before he could say anything else and you eased yourself out of his grasp.

–Your work is calling – you said sadly, and then left.

 Jungkook called you that night, asking to meet you the next day which was a surprise, he wanted to talk with you and you agreed, even if you tried to resist but he had insisted and you just loved him, you wanted to give him a chance to think about this, but then you wondered if you’d done the right thing because he was already half an hour late.

You were meeting at a fancy bakery that you liked a lot, you hadn’t gotten inside because you didn’t want to sit alone since he wasn’t there yet, and it was better since now you felt like a stupid and you would have felt it ten times more if you were in that table. You were just waiting outside with your hands inside your coat, it was cold that night and you just turned around to leave, you should just give him up and try to cope, stop being a fool for him, stop putting him as a priority when he wasn’t doing the same.

You hated to feel your eyes watering down because he wasn’t there once again, so you held back the damn tears and started to walk.

–Y/N! Y/N wait, wait please! – Jungkook was running towards you, he saw you were leaving and he panicked, so he pressed his pace until you turned around to look at him and he stood before you panting, resting his hands on his knees and looking at you apologetically.

You were silent and he could see your eyes glassy, he hated himself for that. All this was a reality check and he felt stupid for having to reach this point to wake up, he almost ruined it again, his mind was a mess, he was a mess himself, but he needed you to trust him now, to see that he needed you, that he wanted you in his life.

–I’m sorry for being late… I’m sorry – he straightened himself and then did the only thing he wanted to, he hugged you tightly. –I’m sorry for everything Y/N –

He whispered those words while burying his face on your hair and felt your arms surrounding him despite everything, he’d been so caught up in the hectic parts of his life that he’d given for granted the special things like a fool.

–I thought you were leaving me alone once again, I thought I wasn’t good for you anymore – your voice broke then and you trembled between his arms, your face was buried on his chest, you were hurt and he hated to be the cause of that.

–I’m a stupid, I know… – he kissed the top of your head and swallowed hardly, the feelings were all wound up in the middle of his throat asphyxiating him. –It doesn’t matter how hard my work is, I shouldn’t have let it get between us Y/N, what we have is important to me, you matter to me the same and I’m a stupid–

Your arms tightened around him and you stayed there, just hugging each other.

–I stood up the manager and the guys too, but they can tell me what they said in the meeting with the producers… I don’t care about that right now, I rather lose that than losing you Y/N – he wasn’t that good with words the majority of the time, but this was not the time to be shy with what he felt, he knew this was his last chance. –I can’t stand losing you Y/N, just the thought of that is… I can’t, I just can’t–

He cupped your cheeks, pulling your face up to look into your eyes. The day before he’d thought he was out of your life definitely and he couldn’t focus in anything else or function properly, whatever he needed to do now to keep you he was going to do it.

–Promise me you will remember that Jungkook – He nodded repeatedly, pulling your face towards his to kiss you. This was him, you were already a part of him and he couldn’t lose you.

–I will never forget it again Y/N – his lips kissed yours once again and he kept you close, the way he should have done before. –Having you is the most important to me because I love you, I love you and I still want you with me, please I… I love you–

You didn’t say anything else, but he saw the little smile on your lips than didn’t look as sad only, he saw a little hope there, shining in your pretty eyes and the way you held onto him there told him you didn’t want to lose him either.