#sidenote obviously im not saying this makes me a lesbian id never call myself that bc there is still an attraction its just like
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I'm starting to firmly believe that I'm only attracted to men in theory not in practice. Dope
#ive never in my life been able to picture myself having sex with a man without it making me nauseous#which i thought was a trauma thing i ought to work through but honestly? who gives a shit. why should i ''work through it''#when i could just. be with a woman. or alone.#sidenote obviously im not saying this makes me a lesbian id never call myself that bc there is still an attraction its just like#entirely removed from myself. i dont want to be involved#feels good to accept this. i feel like i never fully allowed the realization to occur before bc i didnt want#my trauma to define my life. but i dont need to fuck or date men to overcome the trauma#im not letting my rapist ''win'' by only partnering with women. its me who is winning. he's burning in hell & im alive#thats what matters
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