#so literally the day i got the mermaid pendant i got it; got the scene; proposed; then got the 10 heart scene in the same day

[jesterwaves]

i dont think i posted about it, but here's the "bestie wedding" from my friends mutliplayer stardew valley account

we both were stuck in winter with no mermaid pendant, and were romancing sebastian and sam at roughly the same pace, so we wound up proposing on the same day. so not only were we, as friends, getting married on the same day, but sam and sebastian are friends in game! thus the "bestie wedding" was born

[365days365movies]

January 25, 2021: The Poseidon Adventure (1972)

The disaster movie is, oddly enough, a subgenre of action, while also throwing in a splash of adventure. What I mean by that is, like adventure, focus is slightly shifted away from the characters acting against each other, and towards interactions between the characters and the environment around them. Essentially, an external environmental factor, outside of humans, is the antagonist, sometimes quite literally.

Now, obviously, humans can still be villains in disaster movies, but the conflict of the film always have to revolve around the disaster itself, with all other characters merely players in a large conflict. In other words, you got a main guy, shit explodes, and our main guy has to survive, sometimes with assholes getting in their way. Disaster movies in a nutshell, right there.

This movie trend began with 1970’s Airport, considered by most to be one of the crown jewels of the genre, especially at the time. They died in the mid-’70s, and the 1981 movie Airplane! (one of my favorite comedies) was the death knell for the genre...for about 13 years. I grew up in the reboot era of the disaster movie, with Independence Day, Twister, The Day After Tomorrow, War of the Worlds, Titanic, etc. 

But today, we’re looking at what’s said to be the best of the best: the 1972 Academy Award-winning Ronald Neame film The Poseidon Adventure. This is Titanic before Titanic, but also after A Night to Remember...and the actual Titanic, obviously. All I know going in is that the ship is GOING DOWN. Also, Mermaid-Man’s in it. Hi, Ernest Borgnine!

Let’s go! SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Recap

So, the opening text tells us RIGHT OFF that it’s New Years Eve, and that this ship, the S.S. Poseidon, is fucked. I’m impressed that we’re getting that out of the way immediately.

We cut to the ship, a cruise liner full of passengers during a storm. The Captain of the ship, Captain Harrison (Leslie Nielsen...LESLIE NIELSEN???)

From Airplane!? Wow! Never seen him in a dramatic role, so that’s awesome!

Anyway, things ain’t goin’ perfect. While a representative of the new owners of the ship forces them to go full speed (at considerable risk), the passengers include the disgruntled Mike Rogo (Ernest Borgnine) and his wife, Linda (Stella Stevens), the latter of which is going through a bout of seasickness. Other passengers include wide-eyed child Robin Shelby (Eric Shea) and his frustrated teenage sister Susan (Pamela Sue Martin); lonely runner James Martin (Red Buttons); married couple Betty and Manny Rosen (Shelley Winters and Jack “Grandpa Joe Who Could Walk The Whole Goddamn Time The Fuckin’ Faker” Albertson); “modern” preacher Reverend Frank Scott (Gene Hackman) and the more traditional Chaplain John (Arthur O’Connell); and singer Nonnie Parry (Carol Lynley), with her waiter admirer Acres (Roddy McDowall).

We’re introduced to these people in quick and efficient fashion, as well as their modus operandi. Rogo’s a detective-lieutenant, and his wife has a troubled past as a prostitute (and their relationship history is...complicated). The Shelby siblings are headed to see their parents overseas. James Martin’s a fitness-conscious bachelor and haberdasher who goes on morning runs. The Rosens have a son and 2-year old grandson in Israel that they’re going to visit, and are likely staying there. Frank Scott is an outspoken preacher, who believes that God only helps those who help themselves, and has been sent to Africa as a sort of punishment. And Nonnie Parry...well…

Well, she’s singing the song that won this movie the 1972 Academy Award for Best Original Song. YEAH. THAT SONG. You’ve almost certainly heard it, and its fame has far surpassed this movie at this point. 

That night, the song is sung at a New Years Party, at which all of our players are assembled. The Captain leaves for the deck, and discovers that an earthquake has just taken place off the coast of Crete. And underwater earthquakes create tsunamis. And tsunamis...well...the ship’s in for some trouble. Batten down, people. The New Year begins with great bombast and celebration...as the wall of water approaches.

Party’s over.

The ship tips, as the wall of water hits, and EVERYBODY goes falling. And I mean FALLING, it’s one hell of a scene. The ship flips entirely upside down, and people holding on to tables quickly fall. The lights go out. And all is quiet.

As the passengers come to, we get an accounting...of the survivors. After all, no way everyone could’ve survived that. The Rogos, Rosens, Rev. Scott, Nonnie, Acres, Martin, and the Shelbys all survive, although some of them need to be a little rescued from the ceiling.

The ship is now upside down. I’m sure that’ll be an issue eventually. For now, with some argument, Reverend Scott leads everyone in an effort to get up to the former floor, where injured waiter Acres is waiting. They use a Christmas tree as a ladder, and begin to climb up to a doorway out. Although, not everyone is inclined to go. Nonnie is the only surviving member of her band, which included her brother, and is only convinced by Martin to go. 

The group of people that we’ve been following go, but literally everybody else stays behind. Sadly, this includes Chaplain John, who’s resigned himself and the other to their likely fatal end. He and Reverend Scott have a heart-to-heart, and Scott makes one last plea to the rest. However, the ship’s Purser (Byron Webster) insists that they must stay behind and wait for help, and the vast majority agree with him. And as soon as our group gets to safety…

This movie...this movie is fucking brutal. The throngs panic and try to climb to safety, but the tree falls...and everybody dies as the ship begins its descent. And the Reverend watches. And holy shit. I’m shook. Real talk, I am SHAKEN by this, about as much as the Reverend is. This is...whoof.

The group head towards the kitchen, and find a fire door sealed in place. The reverend tries to open it, despite Rogo’s very realistic and good warnings about flashover (the event during which fresh oxygen is introduced to an oxygen-starved fire, reigniting it violently and quickly). Despite this, Rogo helps him with the door, and the fire is luckily not a flashover. Rev. Scott goes in and makes it out, scouting a path through the fire (and the bodies).

They all make it through the kitchen, getting closer to the engine room. And that’s when the water starts coming in.

Once again, they all make it through, and begin traversing the next obstacle: a narrow tunnel that leads to a ventilation shaft with a ladder. Also, Linda (Rogo’s wife) is wearing VERY TALL high heels as she climbs up the ladder. Lady. DROP THE SHOES!!!! 

They continue to make it through the shaft...and then another explosion hits! We lose our first party member, as Acres loses his footing and falls. Rogo almost goes with him, and Nonnie’s paralyzed with fear until Martin helps her.

By the way, I realize that reading this might be a bit cumbersome, as there are a lot of names here. But when you WATCH the movie, all of these people are distinct enough that remembering them isn’t too bad. And now...there are even more people.

That’s right! There are more people, being led by the Ship’s Doctor (Jan Arvan)...in the wrong direction. They head towards the bow, towards the water, despite Scott’s warnings. Scott’s frustration, the loss of Acres, and Rogo’s stubbornness leads to a confrontation. This leads to Scott making a bet with Rogo. He’ll scout ahead for a path to the engine room, and if there isn’t one, they’ll also head toward the bow. Rogo agrees, and gives him 15 minutes. Scott leaves, with Susan Shelby (teenage sister, remember) following behind. The rest search for food and supplies in the rooms nearby.

To Scott’s great dismay, however, the main passage to the engine room is destroyed. With Susan’s help, they look for more passages, eventually finding a path covered in oil. The Rosens have their own heart-to-heart, with Belle resigned to death, and Manny clinging to hope. Martin and Nonnie go together, with Nonnie breaking down over her lost brother, and Martin comforting her as best he can. They eventually reconvene, with Scott returned from the engine room successfully. However...Robin is missing. 

Scott goes back to get him...and that’s when the water comes back.

They all once again make it...but the water’s now flooded the passageway to the engine room. Scott takes a rope and tries to swim through the passageway, with the rope being used to guide everyone else through once he makes it. But, of course, he gets stuck when a metal sheet collapses on top of him. But that’s when a surprising ringer steps up to help.

Belle Rosen, the down-on-herself, most resigned-to-death member of the party, also happens to be a former swimming champion. She makes it through, and saves Scott from drowning...and has a heart attack in the process. She gives Scott a pendant for her grandson...and dies.

And that’s when I start tearing up. Fuck. I mean it, her death really got me. Talk about a heroic sacrifice.

Rogo goes to find them, and discovers that Belle’s gone. Scott tells him to get the others, without telling Manny what happened. But Manny figures it out, diving into the water. The rest follow, although Nonnie can’t swim. Martin tells her that he won’t go without her, and they go together. Manny’s the first to make it to the other side...and he sees Belle.

And that’s when I tear up again. FUCK.

Manny initially won’t leave Belle, and Scott pleas with him to come with. He asks to stay with her a little longer, and Scott relents. He gives Belle one last kiss...and goes to join the others. Thank God. I need Manny Rosen to live, goddammit. In fact...I really don’t want to lose anyone else.

A harrowing climb to the engine room takes place, and we reach the final door. And then, of course...an explosion.

Linda dies. Goddammit. And Rogo lashes out at Scott, blaming him for her death. But there’s no time for that now. Explosions cause a steam pipe to explode, blocking the exit, prompting Scott to do his own lashing out: at God. He jumps to open a valve for the rest, despite the hot steam. He screams at God to take him, instead of another of their lives. And in the process, he shuts off the steam...and his plea is answered in turn.

As Scott dies, he asks Rogo to get the rest through. But Rogo’s listless, not responding at all. Martin reams him out, rousing him again and getting him up to lead the survivors. 6 people left...and only 5 minutes of movie to go. They get to the thinnest part of the hull, where they hear scraping from the outside. They bang on the hull with pipes, and banging responds. A torch cuts through the hull...BUT IT’S NOT A TORCH, IT’S AN EXPLOSION AND EVERYBODY DIES

Kidding, of course, as they get rescued! And as they mourn their fallen, it’s discovered that these 6...are the only survivors. In the entire ship, these six were the only ones to make it out.

And THAT...is The Poseidon Adventure. FUCK TITANIC. See you in the Epilogue.

[glowyjellyfish]

Thinking that surely nothing new has come out about Disenchantment since yesterday afternoon, I took a quick look at the reddit page before bed. I’ve made a huge mistake.

Steampunk city! I know such a trope is common in fantasy kitchen sink type works and DND and the like, but like. I literally just made a comparison to FF9 this morning. The mere fact that Disenchantment is going to have both a traditional kingdom that looks aesthetically similar to Alexandria and a big steampunk city swarming with airships has me convinced we got some kind of FF fan or two amongst the staff. Particularly FF9. I’m probably wrong, but it is (or was) a very popular series, and the aesthetics are very similar. You don’t design that many airships for a fantasy world without at least looking at the classic FF series, famous for its airships. I don’t expect a straight parody as that is not what Disenchantment does, but I’d love to have it acknowledged in some way. (Idk, name the airship dude that Bean grapples with Cid?)

Secondly, although reddit has begun arguing over whether the gal visiting the steampunk city is Bean or young Dagmar, I personally see no reason not to think it’s Bean. It would fit if this is a couple episodes in, she has run into trouble with Dagmar and Maru and is trying to get home, so she is looking for a ride on an airship to get home faster.

(I do think it’s intriguing that many of the airships have a fish-like design, but do not know what to make of it yet.)

Also, seeing Elfo chilling on a cloud had me immediately shift gears from “well, obviously his other half will help him come back from the dead somehow!” to “wait, is this an Order of the Stick situation??” As in:

Some angel or something: You don’t seem very upset about being dead, bro, are you okay?

Elfo: haha, I’m fine! See, my best friends have the eternity pendant, and all they have to do is walk like five feet back to Elfwood and ask nicely for some blood. I’m sure they’ll be happy to help! I’ll be alive again in fifteen minutes, an hour tops. Well, okay, they have to go back to the castle, so maybe... tomorrow morning?

Angel: ...dude, you’ve been up here for six weeks.

Elfo: WHAT

(Meanwhile, we are treated to Luci and Bean trying to locate his body, if they have time between everything they’ve got going on, and/or scenes showing us, the viewers, where his body is ending up, starting with Mermaid Island)

(I mean it totally could still be a case of “Elfo wakes up and is just alive again and doesn’t know why, after the mermaids pulled him ashore”, it’s just that those few seconds of Elfo chilling on a cloud looked very much like Fantasy Heaven and very much NOT like it would be “Elfo chills for a couple days while everything happens and THEN resurrects. It sure could be, that’s just not where my mind went.)