#sorry for vagueposting i just had to get that thought out there cause. honestly this is quite ridiculous ^_^ what's happening.

[rpgbabe]

what that post is saying is not that people with bbls and botox today are hypocrites for decrying corsets.. it's saying the people who should be criticizing current-era barbarisms (whether or not they engage in them) choose to focus on barbarisms of the past instead? we don't have to neglect the fact that corsets and in general the dress and treatment of women in the past was a problem.. but maybe we start with what's literally happening all around us and being pushed in our face 24/7 TODAY in 20 fucking 24. like how can we nitpick about the beauty expectations of women a century or two ago when we're arguably even worse now.... it's about the irony.... it's not saying you can't criticize corsets and equally criticize excessive surgery + makeup practices of today.. it's saying.. why would you pick one? and, at that, the lesser one.

[hyperionswrath-a]

its always upsetting to see a loved RPer leave but it does seem like it might be best! i thought something might be up when you put up a DNI and started vagueposting even though it was actively against yr rules. the rpc must be crazy rn!!!

Came back to export this blog and exchange discords with some people when I saw this and felt the need to reply real quick before I log off again for good. Firstly just let me say that my rules always stated that “excessive vagueing” would get people blocked. I never did that, which I can say with confidence, so I don't think I ever acted against my own rules at any point in time. I also just gently want to clarify if I (or other people for that matter) remind their mutuals of their rules, especially if there has been an increase of disregard for said rules, it is not vagueing. Neither is venting about stressful situations or referencing something in a post or the tags that has been explained in more detail before.

Vagueing means being literally vague about another person, or reacting in a vague (and negative) way to something that happened on the dash. For example: “Some people sure know how to make you feel bad. If you’re replying to someone but our thread is not being touched for weeks, I know what to make of this and it’s not cool” or “Seeing certain people writing the same muse is giving me so much anxiety because of how I see them come off ooc” or, depending on the situation, even a “Oh yeah cool, aight I guess”

To make some examples up out from the top of my head. Vagueing also has a time component and is usually a kneejerk reaction to something that happened shortly before, rarely more than say about a day or two prior to a vague post. It’s important to me to clarify this, because confusing venting/reminding of rules with vagueing waters down the actual problem that vagueing is to the point where everyone that is being mistreated has to be compliant just so there will be no negativity on dash, ever (which, as I said before, would be sweet but again: Where there are people, there will be conflicts, it’s simply human nature). 

Now as for my last and final post I made - if that is what you mean by me vagueing, again, this is not what that was. I explained why I am leaving the rpc behind and one of the reasons is some people’s behavior, yes. I did not name drop anyone because that would be an asshole thing to do right in the lane of senselessly stirring shit up, and there is nothing to be fixed or done anyway because again, I am leaving the rpc behind. Still, my mutuals deserve an explanation because not everyone is online 24/7 on tumblr.com (or shouldn’t be), and also timezones are a component. Also, again, as I said in my post, my decision has not been out of spite, or anger, but for the reasons I explained in said post including things that have cummulated over months.

I hope this puts things into perspective a little and resolves any confusion.

I can only repeat what I always said - the final fantasy rpc has always been a safe haven for me. My (recent) problems are not a reflection of everyone’s experience and I honestly hope communication will become better between writers again because this rpc deserves it.

As for other rpcs… I wish I never dipped my toes in, but that’s also in the past. Sorry I took your message and rambled away a little, but I have had very intense talks with friends about these things and I think it can only help to remind everyone seeing this that it is okay to be firm about your boundaries and rules, to vent when you need to, but that being vague as per my examples above will eventually cause problems that may not be resolved anymore.

[neonboyfriend]

CALLOUT FOR SUCKATOE/JORDAN G.

@suckatoe

tw for: manipulation, guilt tripping, victim blaming, underage drinking, cheating, using someone for sex.

this is not anyone coming after jordan with malicious intent or attacking them. we just want to inform people so jordan doesn’t hurt anyone again. also, so jordan can read this and reflect on their actions and how they choose to better themself.

everything’s under the cut.

KEVIN’S EXPERIENCE:

* note: jordan and i are fictionkin, so in the screenshots i refer to him in different kin names. common ones are joaquin and gregg, though. i also blocked out my name and email address. i am the one with the purple box.  i mention my boyfriend a few times in here, i’m using g to respect his privacy.

i met jordan in early april 2017. we began talking and i developed feelings really quickly. the second day i knew him, jordan got drunk and proceeded to ask me for sex.

i replied “joaquin, you’re drunk” and he replied (mixing up letters because he was drunk) “answer the question.” and i replied, “ask me when you’re sober.”

our friendship continued on and he had a girlfriend at the time. i had a crush on him, so often times i would flirt. i vagueposted about him being cute and that i hated having a crush and he said he wanted to get to know me better before anything starts up. i agreed and we stayed (flirty) friends. he is poly, so i assumed it would be ok to flirt with him. 

at some point, my ex, jordan, his girlfriend, and i all played a round of pretend you’re xyzzy (also known as the online version of cards against humanity.) his girlfriend left because she was jealous and she thought gregg was flirting with me. gregg told me this and i felt so bad.

(pink box is my ex. i hid their name for their privacy.)

i felt guilty but he reassured me that none of this was my fault and that his girlfriend was being manipulative.

we started getting more serious, sending i love yous and being generally very couple-y in the way we talked. jordan said that he eventually would have to tell his girlfriend about us.

he ended up not telling his girlfriend, x, about me despite me telling him that he should. he always said he didn’t want to just yet because he didn’t want to cause a rift between x and him.

** from this point on, i ended up using my phone to talk to jordan. i don’t currently have any of the screenshots (i deleted the conversations a month ago.), so you’ll just have to trust what i’m saying.

then, after dealing with his girlfriend about the situation, he blows up my phone during a really important exam. i don’t have the messages anymore, but essentially it was “why would you do this? why would you flirt with me when you knew i had a girlfriend? don’t you dare ruin this for me kevin i will never forgive you ever do not sabotage me and my girlfriend’s relationship because of your crush on me.”

i didn’t and still don’t understand why jordan put the blame all on me and acted as if i was the only one who flirted. he was flirting as much as i was.

i went home and ended up crying for two days because i didn’t understand why he was saying this like it was my fault. two days later, he comes back and apologizes profusely and is like “i’m so sorry you don’t deserve me i’m such an asshole i hope you can forgive me even tho i shouldn’t have it.” 

i’m really easily persuaded, especially in relationships, i have separation anxiety (prof dx’ed) and get attached quickly, and i missed him a ton so i forgave him. (big mistake.)

in the middle of our relationship, he broke everything off with x. he said x lied about their age and was a bad person. meanwhile, i was friends with x. jordan basically said, “if you don’t stop talking to x, i’m never gonna talk to you again.” so, even though i didn’t want to, i ended up blocking x.

jordan lives/lived in an abusive household where his parents would frequently take his things away and not talk for days, weeks at a time. him being gone so long would really mess me up. he would come back sporadically and then leave again.

this continued until we neared the end of our relationship, in mid june 2017.

his parents would contact me and tell me not to encourage jordan to sneak onto his electronics to talk to me, which i never did. (which, i assume, is what jordan ended up telling them. i wouldn’t be surprised as jordan lies a lot. often times, about nothing. he lied to me once about being 5′10″, when he was 5′6″ instead. it doesn’t seem like that big of a deal, but if he’s willing to lie about super minor things, what else could he be lying about???)

his parents contacted me again the day i broke up with him. jordan posted a selfie and i reblogged it calling him cute. his dad told me to take it down and he was mad. i listened and took it down, and then sent this message.

that pretty much sums up why i broke up with him.

then, i enter a new relationship with my current boyfriend, g. a few days into the relationship, jordan messages me this:

two weeks ago, he contacts me off of his new blog. 

he sounds pretty passive aggressive in his message. then, from what i assume, he blocked me. i check on his new account for any vagues of me. lo and behold, i find this.

i only sent shit to his parents because they contacted me. i was in the wrong to post about him and call him immature, but honestly, seeing this just further proves my point.

i didn’t know at the time that i vagued him that he deleted his blog due to a mental breakdown, all it said was “this tumblr cannot receive messages.” or whatever the blocked message is. 

then, while on his blog, i see this:

if you look back up in the screenshots, youll see that jordan agreed that i did nothing wrong, so why am i in his dfi? who knows.

ULA’S EXPERIENCE:

i messaged ula today, july 22nd 2017, for information on their issues with jordan.

X’S EXPERIENCE:

* note: x wished to stay anonymous, so we replaced their name with x. 

TLDR;

our experiences with jordan are pretty fucked.

DISCLAIMER:

this callout is not an open invitation to harass or bully jordan. 

this callout is merely a warning to those who are friends with jordan and those who are considering getting close. we can’t prevent (nor do we want) people from being friends/close with jordan. the only thing we can really do is put this out there and hope this doesn’t happen to anyone else.

THANK YOU

to ula and x for being kind enough to provide me with your experiences.