#link to original post in source for anyone who maybe sees this and is like wtf r u on abt lmao.

[rpgbabe]

what that post is saying is not that people with bbls and botox today are hypocrites for decrying corsets.. it's saying the people who should be criticizing current-era barbarisms (whether or not they engage in them) choose to focus on barbarisms of the past instead? we don't have to neglect the fact that corsets and in general the dress and treatment of women in the past was a problem.. but maybe we start with what's literally happening all around us and being pushed in our face 24/7 TODAY in 20 fucking 24. like how can we nitpick about the beauty expectations of women a century or two ago when we're arguably even worse now.... it's about the irony.... it's not saying you can't criticize corsets and equally criticize excessive surgery + makeup practices of today.. it's saying.. why would you pick one? and, at that, the lesser one.

[sophieinwonderland]

An Endogenic Response to a Message Towards Endogenic Systems

Trigger Warning: Death Threats, Harassment, Cyberbullying, Ableism, Slurs, Hate Groups

@loafofcatbread

Aren't you one of the moderators of Aspen's server? You are, right?

You all specifically came onto this website to spread hate. Aspen said she wants to normalize cyberbullying endogenic systems. And you're using our tags to post hateful messages to our community because you want to hurt us. That's your intent in being here. Causing pain and suffering to other people for existing.

Why deny it and try to play victim?

Amazing how you accuse us of sending slurs and death threats while Aspen is calling us "Schizo." Specifically while bragging about using it as a slur.

And... you know we can see your reblogs, right Loaf???

And for death threats... we can also see YOUR LIKES!

Yes! We see you, Loaf! Just like we see Aspen!

We see your hypocrisy. We see your bullying. And we aren't going to tolerate it.

I don't know if any endogenic systems have been sending death threats or slurs in response to you all invading our spaces with the intent of hurting and bullying us. I haven't seen this happening, and I would strongly discourage anyone from stooping to your level.

But I DO know what you all have been doing.

You and your disgusting pals aren't allowed to play victim here! Sorry.

And for your talk of misinformation, I've yet to see anything even resembling a source for the claims your side have made. Anti-endos love to assert thing. They like to say whatever nonsense they can come up with as if it's a fact and then expect people just accept it.

But they can't cite in professionals who can back them up because none exist.

And when pro-endos respond with sources, the modus operandi of you all have been to throw slurs and ad hominems as Aspen did when she was sent a link to my post debunking her video.

Maybe you think you're educated because you got all your information of plurality from a popular Tiktoker with an inflated ego and no actual background in psychology or any sources to support her claims, but that's not education. That's indoctrination.

You and your hive have been indoctrinated.

Finally, over the years, I've seen countless traumagenic systems be attacked, bullied and fakeclaimed for being pro-endo, mixed origin or presenting in ways anti-endos deem unusual. And anti-endos, by their nature, encourage fakeclaiming. They encourage invalidating systems. And this has increased stigma of traumagenic systems, normalizing hate against systems of all types.

You are NOT an ally to traumagenic systems.

You're an ally to a hate group.

And it's so sad that you can't even see it...

[featureenvyproductions]

here’s a bird’s eye view of my comic Eyan Eternal

For people who don't know what it is. Bc I think some of you might find it's right up your alley. Well this is an updated one anyway. I do actually have a volume of this out in print right now, but the low def, basic version is online and complete, and tbh, I just want people to read it. I took almost two years to complete this and quite literally poured every waking moment (after work and when I wasn’t fixing stuff in my house) into this to try and finish it.

Ahem

Here is one of these at a glance things! 

If that’s enough to intrigue you, take a look at my chapter masterpost which has convenient links to every chapter post so you don’t have to go figuring out where they are and what order they go in!: https://www.tumblr.com/featureenvyproductions/717516139934154752/eyan-eternal-tumblr-chapter-masterpost?source=share

If you like it and want to support me you can also buy a copy of the first print volume, which collects chapters 1-5 and has a smidge of bonus content (only available in the US right now, but that’s not going to be forever, and I’m working on an e-book as well): https://www.etsy.com/FeatureEnvy/listing/1447399615/eyan-eternal?utm_source=Copy&utm_medium=ListingManager&utm_campaign=Share&utm_term=so.lmsm&share_time=1683565699335

And now here is a more detailed break down if you need more info than that...

*Jonathan Frakes asks you things meme voice* have you ever wondered what you’d find if you REALLY lived forever?

Well, meet Eyan, an immortal vampire.

He’s slowly finding out the answer to that question...

...And it appears to be unbearable isolation.

Eons into the distant future, when most stars have faded in the night sky and the cosmic event horizon has confined any remaining beings to an isolated pocket of the universe, Eyan roams interstellar space in a repurposed generation ship in search of anything that could be considered alive/sentient in the way he is.

So far, he’s out of luck.

That is until he runs into an unexpected former rival on a remote planet - Zero, a sentient android he never expected to be the only other person left alive.

Well. That is, if either of them can really be considered “alive”. What does that mean anyway, when the humans who defined what it means to be alive are all gone?

This is something they’ll have to explore and define for themselves as they attempt to set aside their myriad of differences and try to work together on one of the few ways left to escape the dark fate of ultimate isolation - The Grand Encoder, a machine that can upload minds to a special medium - if it even works for them anyway. In the process, they slowly come to accept that maybe they’d had each other all wrong and weren’t seeing the bigger picture.

You may not find any action-packed Star Wars like escapades here in this sci fi drama. You also won’t find ponderings about the origins of vampires or what gave rise to robot sentience - It’s integral to the plot that these things just ARE. But you will find a thoughtful exploration of identity and how it can cause us to define ourselves and relate to (or abandon) each other depending on the framework within which we are doing that exploration and within which we are compelled to exist. It asks the question, what if the frameworks within which we defined our existence and purpose no LONGER existed...Where would we go from there?

And as two immortal guys who are the only folks left in the universe (as far as they know), Eyan and Zero are just the right people to mull over that.

There is both textual and allegorical queerness in this story - both main characters should be considered gay men, even if it’s The Future TM and terms/exact scopes of identities may not be EXACTLY 1-1 with today’s...But I want to be perfectly clear that it was my intent to make them gay because I wanted to see more gay guys in sci fi and I don’t want anyone erasing that. As for the allegorical stuff - I myself am a trans gay man in my late 30s, so this act of re-exploring and re-framing myself and evaluating how and why queer folks interact with each other the way we do is something I’m very familiar with, and I feel like other folks might relate. (I also peppered in some neurodivergent-person-in-a-neurotypical-world moods tbh.)

Of course it’s not all serious. I do have a bit of fun with some old school vampire tropes, tossing Eyan around and putting him in Situations.

Anyway if this all sounds interesting to you, take a look at my tag and site (above)! I’d appreciate it! I also like to hear from people and see if there’s anything about it you related to! :)

I also do everything. Every last monotonous step (well, aside from literally loading up a printing press to churn out volumes lol - BUT REST ASSURED IF I HAD $10K TO PISS INTO THE WIND I WOULD DO THAT TOO). So if there’s ANYTHING you want to know about my process, I’m happy to tell you so please ask, especially if you’re like trying to get started on your own comic or trying to go to print :) 

Edit before I go ahead and blaze this: I want to say, to be honest, the creation of comic was initially motivated almost entirely by the isolation/loneliness I’ve felt in my life. It’s not as bad as some folks’ and I know that, but it is a really prevalent thread throughout my life and sometimes is almost unbearable, and my comic began as an exploration of that loneliness, as well as a narrative exercise to try and express the depth of it at its worst point. I’m putting this out here because ultimately I don’t know...maybe someone will catch my drift and understand the feeling I’m trying to illustrate, and maybe they’ll want to see the plot that came of those feelings. I am not above the need to feel seen lol, especially if other people out there feel like they can resonate with this experience as well.

[hetalia-club]

Hetalia Stardew Mod Summary Hot Link

Characters (Will be updated as it's posted) America Canada

Mod Details (Note all of this only exist inside my head unfortunately)- All Characters are Romanceable. They have no rival love interest and they will not lose their personality or hobbies after marriage so you don’t feel like you ruined their lives or stole them away from anyone. They will for the most part carry on as usual just with a bit more favor towards you New Events: Firework Festival- Takes place on Summer 4. This event is only attended by The Hetalia characters living in Cindersnap Forest. You Enter Cindersnap Forest at 10PM-12PM on Summer 4 to Trigger the Event. Brew Fest- A mock Octoberfest held at the Café where they all drink coffee instead of beer Enter Cindersnap Forest on Fall 6 at 9AM-3PM to trigger the event. Must be downloaded alongside the: More Crops Mod and Even More Crops Mod to get required ingredients for recipes & Stardew expanded for the space upgrade. The town of Cindersnap can function as your main source of shopping & Conversation Much like how Ridgeside Village & Stardew Valley operate. The characters do converse with the Main Stardew folk but for the most part do their own things. New Buildings: Houses with secret rooms, locked doors and Easter eggs. Maybe you click on a globe in someone’s house and it says “It’s a circle, that’s the earth”.

Cindersnap Coffee House: This is a Café/Bakery that is directly contributed to by each member of the Cindersnap Forest dwellers. Their Role with the bakery will be listed within their bio if they have one. Here you can buy coffees, Latte’s, Matcha, Mochas, and espresso shots along with few new Items like: Croissants, Tiramisu, Pretzel, Apple Pie, Cannoli, Blueberry Scone, Custard, Sugar Pie, Bee Sting Cake, Red Bean,  Buns and Cheesecake that are nods to the Hetalia character’s origins and their recipes can only be obtained from befriending a certain character. The Café/bakery is Owned and Operated by multiple characters.

Brew House- At 7pm all the Characters of Cindersnap disappear into the back room of the Coffee House. Where a Speak Easy is hidden and they will stay there hanging out until 11 and then will all go home. You can only get an invite by getting at least 6 hearts with everyone in town and then you will get an anonymous letter giving you the password saying you have passed the vibe check. Inside you can buy Alcohol from Romano who works the bar because the Coffee House does not have their liquor license and they have to operate this underground.

The Ranch-ery- Owned and Operated by Alfred & Matthew. Matthew runs the counter on Thursdays & Tuesdays and the store will operate as a Nursery and sell only trees, fruit trees and berry, herb bushes (See More crops+ mod) You can buy singular fruit here but the prices are steep you are better off just buying the sapling itself. Alfred operates on Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday. Open from 9am-5pm Monday-Saturday and the shop will operate as a Ranch selling full grown cows, milk, milk buckets, hay, and heaters. The store is closed on Sunday.

Mystic Brews- An oddities shop located inside the wizards tower ran by a shadow creature that you can only gain access to only after befriending England, It focuses on gems, mushrooms, potions and some very rare items like the magic wand for a hefty sum. Seeds n’ Such- a general store with all your seasonal seed needs operated by China. Not much to say about it it’s a pretty straight forward shop.

Paella Stand- in the summer/spring Spain comes to town from Calico dessert to run his street food cart he will live here in town for these two seasons but he doesn’t like the cold so he will go back to Calico in the fall/winter. He sells churros, paella and spiced hot chocolate. All these foods give major speed and energy boosts but the catch is you can’t buy it with money and similar to the trader in Calico to have to trade him for gems.

[jax-yacks]

https://www.tumblr.com/jax-yacks/749851171797204992/hey-this-isnt-my-general-homestuck-poll-blog?source=share

Trans masc John would make more sense than June but that is just a headcanon. Nonbinary Roxy actually makes sense to me. Maybe they could have made Roxy genderfluid, I think that would have worked better than trans guy Roxy. It just doesn't make sense when she lived as a girl while not living around any other humans throughout all of her adolescence. She could have done anything she wanted with no pressure.

You posted: June does not appear anywhere in any piece of Homestuck related media made by an official team member for official purposes as of the writing of this post, and has only truly appeared in a single tweet.

June isn't even in Beyond Canon yet. I feel like I can already judge how June will be written. I already don't like what I've seen. How John was written in the epilogue was someone who was out of touch with reality because he recognized he was a fictional character and nothing is real. He seemed depressed, nearly suicidal, upset with his role of being a father. I don't think it is a good representation of anyone trans. John's story makes being trans look delusional. Reads more like a dig on being trans than anything else to me.

This is an outside looking in take. But from what I've seen there's not really an effort from the homestuck team to portray those themes well. Doesn't make sense that the entire fandom should even accept a headcanon if it's not even written yet. It makes more sense for us to reject it. And I will.

You posted: I won't go into my full breakdown of everything. It requires too much nuance to not be misconstrued more than this post could be, and I just need to remake some posts from my old blog.

I think you should go into it more. You obviously have a nuance take. I'd like to hear it. I think it's a good thing we all have different views here. I'm not trying to be disrespectful with any of what I am saying here, but know that many of the homestuck fans are tired of the June disk horse. I am so sick of June. I'm sick of it because it feels more like moral grandstanding than an actual attempt at representing a trans person's life. It's bad rep if it's trying to even be rep and not brownie points.

Clickable link for the referenced post

Re: trans hcs: I think I just like the tragedy of trans fem Roxy in regards to her infatuation with Dirk, but outside of that I honestly don't have a lot of gender thoughts for Roxy tbh. I love trans masc John especially in regards to all the notes Dad would leave around for him. It's very cute

Re: how transfem John will be handled: I honestly don't care a whole lot about whether it's a good look for a trans person to have gone through what John did as much as there were so many opportunities to work that gender shit into what John dealt with in the Epilogues especially having that conversation with Roxy in Candy about gender. Then again, from what I know about HS2, they didn't exactly follow through with several things they set up in the Epilogues and added things that should have had at least some amount of set up but didn't. Also, I would be more worried if the original writers were part of it still. But no there should never have been an expectation to accept June as canon at all much less before her appearance in Beyond Canon, but technically it was never WP pushing it. Just bnfs, especially one in particular, that they hired while apparently having no policy on how WP staff/contractors/partners should engage with the fanbase.

Re: Going into it more: I moreso didn't go into it in that post and am not going into it in depth here because outside of answering specific questions or responding to specific things, I want to take the time to create a whole huge post about it. I have the one in the Medium post I linked (here it is if you didn't see it), and on one of my old blogs, I had a further breakdown of that post, but I would also like to tackle it in a more organized manner.

Because the thing about June is it was never just about June. June was implicitly a reaction to trans masc Roxy. "They took one of ours so we'll take one of theirs." The creation and popularization of June cannot be separated by transandrophobia and radical feminist ideology present in that particular Homestuck fandom space. Also, as old followers are well aware, I was personally traumatized by that fandom space and primarily by that reaction to June in a few major ways. For realsies. Got a therapist I talk to about it and everything lol Thus, since I have my own potential personal bias wrapped in it more than your average observer, I do want to make sure I am able to talk about what happened with that in mind, especially since what happened to me is one of the things that people should be able to point to as one of the many fucked up parts of how June was being handled by the fandom. Also also, transandrophobia and radical feminist ideology is still alive and well here in queer communities including the Homestuck community, and also I don't want to phrase things poorly and accidentally hurt any trans fems who might read it, but considering we're talking about a trans fem hc that was popularized primarily by a trans fem bnf and their circle of friends that included a few other trans fem bnfs... It can be a touchy subject that I want to handle with care while not shying away from the realities of the situation.

It's all a lot of interconnected stuff and I am but a simple ADHD-haver who enjoys going off on various tangents, so it's hard for me to stick to Just June as a topic if I'm told to sit down and write about how she appeared and was treated in that fandom space. Sometimes even if I am given specific questions to focus on lol Even now I'm thinking about clarifications I should have added and how it wasn't clear that x or y was also a problem etc etc etc

But to address the rest of that final paragraph, it's bittersweet to hear people are tired of June. It's a good reminder for me that things are not as they were, but it also sucks that people are this tired of an inherently neutral headcanon, much less one that's going to inevitably be added to the ongoing official work. And it's not trying to be rep or brownie points imo -- it's just Hussie, seeing his friends share a neat hc that one of said friends (either friends at the time or soon to be friends) helped popularize or even came up with, while being willfully ignorant of the state of the fandom, around June and in general, liking that hc, and deciding it would be cool to make "canon," and then being terrible at communicating with the fandom per usual, and leaving us with no official confirmation she will appear ever at all until a few months ago.

June was a meteor set to blast off in space with Beyond Canon as the ultimate destination, carried on in these past several years by nothing more than the inevitable force of troll Isaac Newton.

[isthedogawolfdog]

youtu(dot)be(slash)g-7cLXyMp8E?si=OQ_6WDtl_dnMj9DP

Thoughts on this video on the reintroduction of wolves to Yellowstone and also the article that it cures which claims the Yellowstone narrative is factually inaccurate?

BAHAHAHA I am fucking CACKLING.

Okay so this video:

was posted in late 2020 and BOY HOWDY is it a wild ride. Because I need a distraction and am feeling particularly petty right now I'll see if I can break down the video and it's... um... "facts".

Before I start though the dudes YouTube is chock full of extreme vegan takes so I wouldn't say he's the top tier candidate for good sources lol.

"Introduction"

The beginning is meh. Y'know the usual thing some Youtubers do with the whole "is this really true???" thing with unreasonable amount of suspicion? yeah. He pretty much makes comments on how maybe the reintroduction of wolves into YNP wasn't the "incredible success story that it was made out to be." Which I feel like the, y'know, the many hundreds of research papers on the wolf reintroduction into YNP and the massive benefits it's created kinda contradicts? but I mean what do I know.

"Yellowstone narrative is misleading"

So this part opens up with this video (which I don't feel like watching rn if I were being honest so I'll save that for later) that blew up a bit ago regarding how wolves change rivers, and the claim that it was misleading, untrue, etc. The youtuber (who we shall call Hancock because "Youtuber" will get boring) uses this source to stake the claim that the positive impact wolves have had on rivers in YNP isn't true.

As we would know if we actually did research and didn't talk out of our ass, wolves didn't directly affect the rivers just by hunting elk, but beavers as well. Aspen and willow are, surprise surprise! a favorite food of beavers. Prior to wolf reintroduction riverbeds and waterways in YNP were in terrible shape, mainly due to erosion and lack of support from water loving plants, which are... tada! willow and aspen! Beavers and elk chowed down on these plants in huge amounts due to their numbers being so vastly out of control due to lack of predators. So when wolves came around and started hunting the plentiful beavers and elk, the willow and aspen were basically like "oh shit! we aren't being eaten to the point where we're all dying!! lets grow more!!" and in turn the more willow and aspen = more footing for the soil along waterbeds which means the rivers were saved. Some of this was mentioned in the article that was linked but wasn't mentioned by Hancock so idk what's up with that.

To sum it up, wolves made an impact! And it's silly to just write that off completely!! I think my issue with this part is that Hancock completely writes wolves impact on the environment off, which is frankly ridiculous. The original video may have overstated it a bit, but it's not like it doesn't exist.

"The balance of ecosystems"

Hancock then talks about the complexity of the YNP food chain (kinda), and how some people feel the need to restore the balance in nature if we humans fuck it up which?? like yeah?? we should?? He goes into a schpeel about values or whatever and if we value certain ecosystems over others??? Idk I was NOT tracking.

He mentions his thoughts on "which balance is best for the animals that live there". Goes on slight anthropomorphizing tangent then dives into the next part...:

"Ecology of fear"

Ah, lads, we are back in biology class aren't we. Except this time we are anthropomorphizing the hell out of everything! "The deer are afraid of being eaten alive, so afraid that they sometimes choose to eat less..."

Okay, did anyone tell this guy that the amount of food the herbivores (ungulates namely) before wolves were reintroduced was literally killing everything? Without wolves to balance the prey populations out they overgrazed, populations skyrocketed and so did disease.

The rest of this is a tangent, so I'll skip over it.

"Wolves suffered too"

Hancock cites the outbreaks of canine distemper disease that have occurred in YNP since reintroduction. This is a bit of a mute point, since canine distemper can fuck any canine population up whether it's a brand new reintroduced group of wolves or they've been there for decades.

Also, can we note how he talks about canine distemper then shows a wolf with mange?? hmmmm.

"Numbers of animals vs welfare"

Dude talks about random bullshit regarding animal rights. Loooooots of emotional heartstrings attempting to be pulled. He is 10000% coming from one of those anti-predator perspectives. Biiiig yikes.

"It's too complex (human health analogy)"

This section was basically mansplaining but with vegans lol.

"The choice we have"

He brings in wild animal contraception?????? I???? Girl what. I mean it's a thing yeah but I did not expect that to be where he was going.

Hancock talks about "one of the cruelest, and unfortunately most romanticized and thus most prevalent methods of population control" AKA reintroducing predators. Hmmmm it's almost like he didn't read about the mass amount of ungulates and other prey animals dying off in YNP when winter came (prior to reintroduction) and there wasn't enough food to sustain them all, subjecting them to excruciating deaths and long drawn out starvation and disease.

Hancock then goes onto how animals eat each other alive, which like, yeah, they do. AND THEN he talks about "wild animal suffrage" which, frankly I refuse to google. Blah blah blah he's anti-hunting who would've thought.

"we didn't do it for the animals"

Okay this actually has some value to it. Hancock talks about how wolves weren't reintroduced for their benefit, or anyone else, but only for people and tourism. This is both right and wrong.

I'm sure that all the biologists and hard working members on the reintroduction team would disagree that it wasn't done for the animals, but who knows. Anyway, the point that tourism would rake in a lot of cash for the state was also something that helped wolves get reintroduced, since we know many government officials weren't in it for the animals. So yeah, sort of true, but not really.

Hancock goes on about what animals are concerned about, even adding a little wolf with a thought bubble (which tbh, I'm sure if wolves knew about the technicalities of biodiversity they would love it, since it usually means a better quality of life). More anthropomorphizing and entitled vegan guilt tripping.

At this point I stopped watching, since it's already been roughly an hour, and although I could do this all day, I have to work later.

To answer your question anon, this video is very poorly put together and I wouldn't touch it with a ten foot pole. There is little to no research done prior to creating it, and the creator talks from a animal rights activist point of view, which is never helpful.

[bardkin]

being a ridden dragon & not yet knowing what that entails

inspired by @who-is-page's post here! i decided fuck it !! i wanna write (more) about the draconic aspects of myself, timidness be damned.

as a quick preface, i am a psychological 'kin! i hold loose beliefs in multiverse & a form of reincarnation, but i don't know for sure if / don't think those things apply to me specifically.

o()xxx[{:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::>

i've known i'm a dragon for a while, now. i go somewhat in-depth about it here in this entry about adopting/trying out the term folcintera for myself, but i didn't really touch on one of the newer revelations i had about it:

i'm the dragon in a rider-dragon pair.

as for how i know this, it just feels Correct. (far as i'm aware,) i don't have any past or concurrent life memories, or know who/what my rider is or was. this is a noema that i cannot explain further, as of yet. I Just Know this aspect is fact.

i mentioned [in my linked entry] that my first up close exposure to dragons was the Eragon series, which is what cemented my idea of what "dragon" was to me. ever since that series, i've been aggressively hyperfixated on dragon-rider stories; the kind of hyperfixation that waxes and wanes, but when it hits, it Hits like a Truck.

i don't think i'm from any one specific source, such as How to Train Your Dragon, Dragonriders of Pern, or Eragon. none of those really feel like places i've lived or belonged in. my specific brand of dragonity is wildly different from any dragons you'd see in the listed settings/stories, so i am not any dragon you'll see in those stories — but i also am.

moreso, i feel a connection to the dynamic between rider and dragon; the trappings don't truly matter, in the end. i am the archetypal dragon-with-a-rider, and see myself in almost any dragon-rider setting. i am a Ridden Dragon, and that will mean something different to everyone who interacts with dragon-rider lore — including myself. i am both folcinteric and an archetrope, in this regard.

before i awakened, and thought about dragon-rider stories, i thought i was simply wanting to live in a world where i could share a bond like that & go on adventures... and while that's still true, since i'm an escapist storyteller, there's a key difference between then and now.

i thought i had to relate to and imagine myself as the rider — and that never felt completely right.

now that i'm aware of and better exploring my draconic side, this aspect has come to light. and i have No idea what it could mean for me.

as stated, i don't know who my rider was/is or could be. i don't know what our dynamic was like, if our bond is of magical origin or through mutual trust. though, that might have something to do with me being archetypal, here. my rider could be anyone; our bond origin could be of any type, so long as it serves the purpose of the archetype.

dragon riding means different things to different people. sometimes it's about taming a wild beast, akin to horseback riding. other times it's a magical bond. and other times still, it's about trust and friendship.

i still don't know what my personal mythos is, or if i have one at all. maybe it is just that dynamic, nebulous and without a tether. or maybe it's just not uncovered quite yet.

i don't know how common being a ridden dragon is, be it in fictherian/fictionkin dragon spaces, or more general dragonkind spaces, because i haven't seen it talked about much. possibly because i'm just not looking in the right places, but, *shrug*!

i have no idea if this post will inspire any other dragons with riders (or maybe even dragon riders!) to write about their experiences. but, never know unless i post, so ;]

thanks for reading!

[saintmeghanmarkle]

Proposed fact checking website/blog by u/Larushka

Proposed fact checking website/blog Several sinners, me included, really want to see these two reap their rewards for all their lies. It was suggested that maybe a website/blog with actual facts compared to what they said, where they’ve changed facts, where statements are made out of context, etc. Seeing as there is currently no main stream journalist willing to actually challenge them, I was thinking that we could create a space where all of their lies and deception are listed.This would need to be professional and fact based with PRIMARY source links. It should be in chronological order. It could be based on the timeline I just posted separately, and that would give us a good framework to begin.https://ift.tt/WMYTlmA also think it should include any time they’ve put out misleading press, stolen valor, puff pieces etc. - anything where they’ve manipulated the truth. Also all the quotes Meghan has incorporated into her speeches but failed to attribute to the original source.Sadly, ill health prevents me from taking this on myself, but I would be more than willing to contribute some time and effort, and I’m pretty sure there must be loads of others here who’d be willing to help, just waiting for those two to get their just desserts.It would need to be chronological (I just posted a timeline), proof-read, fact checked, edited and scanned with a legal eye. It must look professional.If we can create something like this, I’m pretty confident that we could attract the attention of the real royal reporters like Richard Eden and Rebecca English. At this point I’m also sure Dan Wootton, Sharon Osbourne and even Piers Morgan would be on board. And most certainly the Australian press and Megyn Kelly.I’ve followed the Royal family all my life - much more intensely since Meghan came on the scene. I’ve spent an inordinate amount of time trying to come to grips with how this horrible person is seemingly untouchable by the mainstream press. I used to think, like many of us, that Harry was a nice guy. To me, one of the best things that Meghan’s presence has done, is show us who Harry really is.There is nothing more I’d like at this point to revel in some well deserved schadenfreude.https://ift.tt/SJMTriA since we know for sure that sugars, YouTubers, et al read this sub, and Meghan’s propensity to clap back about online truths, and subsequently manipulate the SEO, it would be interesting to watch this evolve in real time.So what do you think fellow sinners? Is there anyone out there with the time and wherewithal to spearhead this? Thoughts? post link: https://ift.tt/c6PmNTR author: Larushka submitted: March 10, 2024 at 09:27PM via SaintMeghanMarkle on Reddit disclaimer: all views + opinions expressed by the author of this post, as well as any comments and reblogs, are solely the author's own; they do not necessarily reflect the views of the administrator of this Tumblr blog. For entertainment only.

[goofballproximitysurveyor]

I drew this, please stop reposting it without credit!

a sort of indulgent rant :P

[original post as proof]

Since the wider internet is talking about plagiarism I think it's a good time to start talking about art theft/uncredited reposting/etc. as well and I'm particularly going to talk about my experience with it.

Before I say anything else I want to say please don't harass people who may not have a good grasp on internet etiquette! (and please assume that is the case unless someone has intentionally plagiarized/stolen people's work and credited it as their own) That is not what I'm asking you to do and for future reference if someone was excessively rude to you in calling out that you reposted my things I did not endorse that behavior. I do encourage calling out when you see people reposting art and linking back to the original work but I do not encourage harassment. On a similar note, this isn't meant to make anyone feel bad or guilty for not having a good grasp on this particular thing. This is just me explaining how it makes me feel and hopefully get people to understand why it's so hurtful so they don't do it in the future, and maybe they get to me explaining it nicely before other people explain it not-so-nicely LOL.

Some reasons why I personally don't like it when people repost my art even if this particular post is a shitpost and not something I put a whole lot of effort into:

(This list is definitely independent/fanartist-centric, I'm not really claiming this to be anything but that.)

Images get edited and distorted as the meme chain goes on, I have seen this end up with artists feeling like their art that they put a lot of effort into like all that work was a joke. Which, evidently is pretty disrespectful

In a personal anecdote, I have seen people say really rude things about me and the Blazblue community on Tumblr while reposting my things (art and otherwise) on twitter and other social media sites. It's really hurtful that people will disrespect me and my friends while using the bits and pieces they like.

Additionally, not everyone on the internet is familiar with common English-speaking internet terminology and etiquette. What may seem like a compliment or neutral statement for you may be rude to them. Generally speaking, a lot of Japanese artists take great offense to their work being reposted in any way whatsoever. ESPECIALLY if you didn't ask beforehand. People have privated or deleted works or entire accounts over this.

It takes away attention from the artist, and this isn't just people complaining about their art not getting enough likes/reblogs online. I have had my commissions open for months with next to no attention toward it and have periodically given up on promoting, with that in mind I grow more bitter about the fact that my only work that regularly gets attention isn't even representative of my current work but also isn't even attached to my name.

There are a lot more reasons, but it really is just a matter of respecting people who make the content you like and crediting people who make things you like.

If you see art that might be fanart and want to find the original source so you can either share it in a server, ask the artist permission to use it somewhere else, or sort of vigilante credit it for somewhere else, here's some places you can easily reverse search for images or find the artist who drew them (hint: if a work has been deleted it's good practice to still credit the artist)

SauceNAO - especially good for fanart since it's a curation of popular Japanese and western image sharing sites. Works best with full images. Found my art on pixiv and deviantART.

Google Image Search - Unreliable, may work with popular artwork but will probably struggle to find it otherwise, very rarely found my artwork. But probably your better bet for heavily cropped images at least to find the full image and then plug it in sauceNAO

But even then the best practice is if you don't know the source don't repost it until you've found it, and always reblog/retweet/what have you from the original artist before considering reposting it on your own account. Be strict and insistent on asking if people know the source of art they are reposting especially in discord servers and online spaces where it's commonly done.

[faceimploded]

A certain song that describes (a hypothetical) Ceroba

Edit:

@engisanic pointed out there's literally a line in the pacifist route, right before Ceroba engages in battle:

"I almost wish you never showed up in the Wild East. Maybe then I could've continued to bury my sorrows in the Saloon."

Thanks for the correction! Original post below:

-------

I've been hooked on reading fanmade Undertale Yellow written works (i.e. fanfiction), and I notice there's a sort of headcanon(?) that mostly involve Ceroba getting drunk most of the time as a way to cope with grief.

Incidentally, while reading up on more fics, a certain song started playing, and I realized it does describe this aspect pretty well, so I'll be breaking the song's lyrics down and include some personal interpretations (though if anyone has some insights or info to add, that'd be great!)

------

「思い出酒」

omoide zake

Memories (brought forth from sake)

by Sachiko Kobayashi (小林 幸子)

Feel free to listen to the song linked above in the title first—there's even a translation provided by the channel jpoptranslationsbyalulu, thought there are some nuances from other sources that I don't quite agree with (hence the personal interpretations).

Presuming that Ceroba does drink a lot, this song would make a lot more sense in that context—even more so that it's (modern) enka, a type of sentimental ballad where the song's theme often involves romance and bleak life themes, perhaps like heartbreak or loneliness. A love song of sorts in some ways.

If the underground had a karaoke box, I can imagine Ceroba singing to this.

With that, I'll be breaking down the song into stanzas and analyze each of them as follows:

---

Japanese

Romaji

English (literal translation)

Let's start with the first stanza:

無理して飲んじゃいけないと

muri shite nonja ikenai to

"Do not force [yourself] to drink"

肩をやさしく抱きよせた

kata wo yasashiku dakiyoseta

Gently embraced the shoulder

Putting these two lines together, the nuance is that someone walked up to the singer (or speaker) and is warning her not to drink too much before pulling her into a gentle embrace.

It's interesting though that the second line is left ambiguous since there's nothing to specify who's doing the action (in this case, embracing their shoulder). As a result, some may interpret this as the speaker finding comfort and relief in the drink itself rather than a person.

Then again, the first line already indicates a sort of quote (と), so I think this was more in the literal sense of a stranger talking to the speaker.

You probably see where I'm going with this, but somebody (likely a certain sheriff) caught Ceroba over-drinking, and he's telling her to take it easy as he comforts her.

---

The song heads straight to the chorus (where the first and third lines are repeated, so I'll focus on the second lines in future choruses):

あの人どうしているかしら

ano hito doushiteiru kashira

How is that person faring?

噂をきけばあいたくて

uwasa o kikeba aitakute

[I] want to meet them upon hearing those rumors

おもいで酒に酔うばかり

omoide zake ni you bakari

Only drunk in sake and memories

Being close friends, it's no surprise that your friend's wellbeing will be a constant in your thoughts, but the second line seems to indicate a pretty strong desire, a longing to see them just thinking about them, just hearing a single mention of their name.

If only we knew what Ceroba was really thinking... Hm.

---

The second stanza:

ボトルに別れた日を書いて

botoru ni wakareta hi wo kaite

[I] write about the day I parted from the bottle

そっと涙の小指かむ

sotto namida no yubi kamu

and lightly bite my pinky wet with tears

It took a while for me to understand the 'bottle' part, but the speaker, who had such a strong tendency to lean towards drinking, is now putting a hold on drinking (parting from the bottle). Well, putting the sake bottle away anyway. Because the speaker is now drunk on something else: a certain feeling, a certain longing. A desire strong enough to put them off drinking (for even a day?) and long for this person it pains her.

---

The second chorus is the same except for the middle second line:

あの人どうしているかしら

ano hito doushiteiru kashira

How is that person faring?

出船の汽笛ききながら

defune no kiteki kikinagara

I hear the steam whistle of the ship

おもいで酒に酔うばかり

omoide zake ni you bakari

as [I] get drunk on sake and memories

Perhaps the speaker is still drinking, but at least this one time, she seems to be pouring her heart into a letter.

Really, most of the lines here are self explanatory, but that changed line makes it feel more like a farewell, as if the person the speaker longs for is about to leave her, or go some place far from her reach.

Almost as if the beloved person just... you know.

---

Third and final stanza before the last chorus:

いつかは忘れる人なのに

itsuka wa wasureru hito nanoni

Even if they're someone [I'll] forget one day

飲めば未練がまたつのる

nomeba miren ga mata tsunoru

When I drink, memories [of that person] will surface once again

It seems like the speaker has somehow managed to get over their problem... until they drink again. She's back to drinking. A relapse. Except this time, now there's an extra layer of heartbreak and longing.

Personally speaking, I don't really think about someone unless they're someone I wish I never met, or if it's a loved one who's... fallen. I think people don't really think about others until something bad happens. Either way, that relationship from earlier seems to have crumbled and is now only a memento for life (which the speaker may or may not choose to remember).

---

The final chorus with this line changed to:

あの人どうしているかしら

ano hito doushiteiru kashira

How is that person faring?

くらしも荒れたこのごろは

kurashi mo areta kono goro moNeglecting [my] life these days,

おもいで酒に酔うばかり

omoide zake ni you bakari

[I am] drunk in nothing but sake and memories

Back to square one, but it's reached a point where she just doesn't really care about her life or current state anymore, and the only seeming comfort is her initial solution: to drink and lose herself in long gone days and sake.

--------

Well, all of this is just a what-if analysis so it may not even apply to canon.

Also, I just noticed the beginning of the song just sounds very North Star. Starlo-ish. Hehe.

Time to write a fic involving this song.

Edit 2:

Just realized this song applies to Chujin as well

[sophieinwonderland]

H-hey,,, i-i'm on anon because this is very e-embarassing to ask for... b-but i found this v-very long post basically fakeclaiming a lot of systems online and claiming that being plural is a trend. T-they also said that pluralkit is anti-recovery and a bunch of other stuff. I-i feel destroyed inside and I know i should not care about haters that much, b-but i was wondering if you can respond to the post in some way, by debunking it i-or maybe just saying that it is not valid. I-i understand if you cannot do this and i wouldn't be mad at you, i just thought that i might try. /gen

This is the post: https://www.tumblr.com/nbhdsc4ss/742946435586277376/im-tired-of-this-boom-of-plural-trend?source=share

Yikes! That's such a terrible post!

Alright, let's go over this.

First, just another reminder that if 1.5% of people have DID as is estimated, over a hundred-million people in the world should have the disorder.

Just on this alone, I find fad claims to be nonsense. We aren't actually seeing anywhere near the numbers of people with DID online who should have it. And that's without touching other forms of multiplicity.

This is an incredibly unhealthy outlook.

A system shares their life. The life doesn't belong to any single headmate. Hosts can change over time. And many systems don't really have a true "core." The very concept of the core is largely outdated.

What?

I think this post is killing my neurons! I can feel my brain cells dying as we speak! 🙄

Anyway, just in case anyone was worried this might be true. It's not. I don't know what they're talking about. There's nothing about switching killing neurons anywhere.

As far as I can tell, any association with cerebral palsy is also made up.

Honestly, I could spend eons unpacking the misinformation in this paragraph alone.

I made this blog back in 2021.

The Plural Association was founded in 2020.

"Endogenic system" was coined in 2014.

The Natural Multiples movement dates back to the 90s.

And "system" has been in the vocabular of all these groups since even the beginning.

And while it's not quite a medical term, it does at least originate in medical contexts. The only difference is that the plural community uses it as an identity label for plurals while most academic sources refer to a personality system as something everyone has, with the personality system of multiples being composed of dissociated parts. (Sometimes called "subsystems" in DID literature to denote alters being personality systems within personality systems.)

Words make communication easier.

Calling a headmate an "introject" is easier that referring to them as a headmate based on a source.

Also, blurring and blending generally mean that multiple headmates are, well, blending together. It's hard to know who is fronting because there are multiple headmates who feel like they're mixing, and it makes it confusing.

But another reason for not knowing who is fronting could be a sort of autopilot like in DPDR. Differentiating between these experiences is useful.

Wait... Affection between alters is anti-recovery?

You know, this really puts the earlier lines about non-host alters stealing the life of the host into perspective.

Not only does this draw a picture of an adversarial relationship between alters, but they're treating that adversarial relationship as being good for recovering, and feeling affection for them as a bad thing.

This is possibly the most harmful take I've ever seen.

As for the rest of it, subsystems (as we use the term) are just headmates more closely linked. I've never heard anyone phrase it as an alter having DID. But I guess I can see the parallel. And again, splits and switches don't damage braincells. Having a bigger system isn't going to make the "days of the body count down."

Wait... weren't you just claiming switching literally kills neurons? I mean, I agree that alters can't permanently die (under normal circumstances) but this feels kinda contradictory.

As for having different disorders, this depends a lot on the disorder. By and large, I believe any condition that can be psychogenic can be experienced by some alters and not others.

But what conditions could be psychogenic would probably surprise you. Look at the woman who had some blind alters and some sighted alters.

Polyfragmented systems were traditionally systems with upwards of 100 alters. (And "highly complex" isn't a medical term.)

And again, splitting and switching doesn't kill neurons. Having a bunch of alters isn't going to kill you! Nor will it allow your rights to be stripped and get you forcefully institutionalized against your will so you can be studied like a lab rat!

Why would you just assume the doctors are misdiagnosing you though?

I mean, typically, DID is incorrectly diagnosed as other disorders far more often than you have people be incorrectly diagnosed with DID.

Again, there's this disturbing emphasis on the alters existing for the host and being bad for wanting things of their own, which bring back to mind their assertion that affection between alters is anti-recovery.

And I just... feel really bad for the other alters in this system. This is just so... sad...

If they're not real kids, then what's wrong with them being on the internet?

I mean, yeah, all alters need pronouns. If any identify as a different gender, it's important to have pronouns for them so you know what to refer to them by. Why is this controversial? 🤷‍♀️

And what does the part about alters becoming useless mean?

Talk therapy isn't magic. Yes, it can help to speak to a professional, but I don't understand the view that it's impossible to fuse without seeing a therapist.

Oh, and the line about how "knowing things about another alter is impossible" is nonsense too. Most DID systems don't have total amnesia all the time every time they switch. And many who do experience amnesia can still communicate. They can learn about their alters by asking. And even ones who don't communicate internally can learn to communicate through notes and text!

...

Yeah... this post is just... so... so... SO bad. In every way! Just mountains upon mountains of harmful takes and misinformation!

[thekavseklabs]

"I think polyphobia is real funny and cute and that being called out for and made fun of for bigoted polyphobic behavior on one of the queerest websites out there is cyber bullying and I say ic =/= ooc but I keep making ic posts abt ooc events and opinions leading to any other possible shit ic views seem A Lil Sussy but it's nothing I prommy <3"

This is not a call out, this is a criticism. I don't care enough to make a call out, and a call out requires receipts. I do have a few, but not a lot, because the original post was deleted (this is the link I was given to it, by the time I looked, it was gone. Idk if a link to a deleted post does anyone any good). I also do not care enough to go into detail about the original post, because unlike them, I don't like to make inflammatory claims without backing them up with reliable sources that aren't known bigots.

I do care enough to send you a few paragraphs of unfriendly reminders that your claims require sources to back them up, but you referred to that as harassment despite it being one singular ask albeit, admittedly, passive aggressively worded. I would not specify who this is about, but I have a rule against vagueing, and I see a lot of people bringing up this subject without actual clarifying what this is about, which is unhelpful and misinforming. The drama is about charlotte-liddel, and anyone reading this can check their blog to form their own opinions.

Here's mine: you suck, and if everyone says you suck, maybe you should consider that maybe, just maybe, the popular opinion is right. Also, you seem to think one specific person is behind this "harassment", but I can confidently say that no one told me to harass you, I saw the shit you posted and was rightfully disgusted, and others I've spoken to are doing the same. So if one person is behind this, it's you. You could have chosen to simply say you don't want to write polyamory, and that would have been fine. Instead, you made a big stink.

I don't want this to become actual harassment, guys, it's clear they're only going to double down on their behavior, which helps no one. Look, form your own opinion, block or don't, don't spam them with asks- they're not responding to actual attempts to get sources on their claims, and aimless hate is pointless. I just want everyone to know who, specifically, this circle of the rpc is vagueing about.

[uptoolateart]

Going through old post drafts before the next episode airs. This is a bunch of musings I had about Kagami, working on the assumption that she's a sentimonster.

First of all, after Perfection I really wondered when Kagami was made. If you know the answer based on spoilers, please don't tell me, because I'm watching in order.

But imagine if it was shortly before that fencing lesson in Riposte. It always struck me as strange that Adrien had never heard of her before. She was meant to be so renowned - and Tomoe has business connections with Gabriel.

And she wasn't introduced to Adrien in a normal way. She was sent into that lesson, masked, with a mission to compete with him. When she lost (or maybe didn't), she rang up Tomoe and told her she'd failed, indicating that there was a very specific purpose to that meeting.

I know Adrien viewed her Wikipedia page in that episode, but her mother / Gabriel could have easily set that up and invented a history for her. She could have literally been 'born yesterday'.

And now we move onto her name. I've pointed out a number of times that it's the Japanese word for 'mirror'. Previously I said she acts as a mirror for Adrien, as they have a lot in common and she often helps him reflect on himself.

But...her name has also been a glaring clue ever since her debut on the show, because she could be seen as a mirror for her mother. Tomoe is one of those parents who wants to live vicariously through her daughter. Taking God complexes to the extreme, she sort of made Kagami in her own image, forcing her to take up her interests and live up to her standards.

Kagami wanted to be an artist and Tomoe wouldn't allow it. That would be way too much self-expression. Any chance of asserting independent personality is thwarted. You know...like Gabriel does to Adrien. We all know Gabriel has a God complex.

What really got me about Perfection was the concept of nothingness Kagami expressed when akumatised. In a hint at her cultural background, she sort of became pure energy, formless. It was really Zen in concept.

For those who don't know, some key principles of Zen philosophy are:

Denial of the ego (Kagami achieves this through relinquishing her physical body)

Everything in the universe is interconnected (I think this was expressed through Kagami embodying the elements)

Attachment is a key source of suffering (Kagami renounced friendship, as it caused her too much pain)

Human perception is flawed (Kagami gained the power to no longer hear or see anyone, allowing her to filter out distractions and achieve greater objective clarity...or so she claimed)

Kagami ruminates that in her non-corporeal state she has given up all fear. She no longer worries about disappointing her mother or Marinette. 'Everything is so calm now. So peaceful. So...perfect.'

Perfection is a standard Kagami and Adrien are both held to. But perfection is also repeatedly linked with blankness. Staying in the context of Eastern beliefs, this blankness is a removal from the material world.

As someone who was originally raised with an Eastern religion, this whole scene struck a nerve in me. There are different ways you can interpret and apply such beliefs to your life. Some use them to enrich their family life. I mean, if you truly believe you are not your body, it stands to reason that you don't really 'own' your daughter. Therefore, you shouldn't control her, instead supporting her as a fellow soul in the journey through life. Ahem, Tomoe.

But I've seen so many people distort these ideas and use them as an excuse to run from their problems and disconnect from others. I've seen people use the 'we are not the body' thing as a reason to walk out on their kids. This is what we see with Kagami when she gives up friendship - potentially beautiful ideas twisted into unhealthy escapism, because Gabriel is in control, manipulating things.

At the same time, if Kagami is a sentimonster, this Zen moment has other implications. We can link it back to Adrien in Wishmaker, when he says his head goes blank every time he tries to think of what he wants - and when he finally realises his childhood dream was to be whatever his parents wanted him to be.

Working on the assumption that Adrien is also a sentimonster (and again, if you know the answer, please don't tell me, but...it just seems so obvious that he is one)...he and Kagami are both blank canvases for their parents to paint on. The second half of Perfection was chilling - because sentimonster theory aside, there are plenty of real parents who treat real children this way.

The good thing is that if you're a blank slate, you just need to take back the paintbrush and then you get to make whatever picture you want. Kagami and Adrien have the power to be whoever they want to be - just like we all do, no matter who tries to dictate who we are. Go on, Kagami - be the artist you want to be. Write a manga.

As an aside, if that ring Kagami wears holds her amok, it's interesting that she's allowed to wear it. Gabriel doesn't let Adrien wear his ring, because that would give Adrien too much self-control. In a strange way, Tomoe seems to have given her daughter a bit more personal freedom. And given her action against Gabriel at the end of Perfection, Tomoe also seems to care about her child more. I still don't think she's winning Mother of the Year, but...well, I guess when you're being compared to Gabriel, you'll always come out looking better.

As ever, I feel like there are a million other things I could add to this, but it's already long enough. Please no post-Perfection spoilers in the comments :)

[lordisitmine]

TTNBD BLOG PART FIVE

Covers chapters five and six of Though the Night Be Dark

These two chapters were originally supposed to be one, but I split them so I could keep the posting going faster and because the scenes shook out into two neater separate sections. But I’m doing the commentary together because my brain still has them linked.

CHAPTER FIVE: HOMECOMING

Back at it again with the Abberline POV. I started using his perspective for situational observations in TTEOE and got a little addicted to it tbh… I love a good outsider POV. Something about a character who has no idea the true gravity of the situation seeing bits and pieces of the main character’s story- delicious.

Nice day for a funeral. I’ve actually never been to a funeral in the wintertime, but Abberline’s observations about death seeming more natural during the colder months are in line with my own thoughts. When the earth is slumbering, and the trees are feigning death until spring, death itself seems less absurd, if not any less saddening.

I had a ball writing Francis Midford in this scene. As we know, she’s usually very calm, bordering on cold- a level-headed somewhat stern woman who isn’t at all prone to wild displays of emotion. However, all bets are off when one has lost a child. They say it’s the worst kind of grief a person can experience. I think that warrants an outburst or two.

Of course, it’s not Abberline’s fault, what happened to Edward- and Francis knows that too- but anger is natural, of course, and I just like a good shocking slap across the face moment. Too bad it was at Abberline’s expense. He blames himself, even though he shouldn’t, and Francis’s whole freak-out certainly hasn’t helped. Thankfully, Lizzy is much more reasonable. Probably because she knows a little bit more about the situation than her mother does, though she’s not ready to share that information with anyone just yet- except maybe Sybil.

Poor Abberline will have to remain in the dark for a little while longer, it seems.

Back to the boys- coming ‘home’. It’s not really home anymore. I don’t think Ciel ever had a home, at least not one that was a place. He thinks it himself- that Sebastian is more of a home to him than anyone or anywhere or anything else. They’re two halves of a whole.

Sebastian reverting back to butler mode and taking care of everything when he can sense that Ciel is uncomfortable or overwhelmed has been checked off the sebaciel bingo- I have a running mental list of tropes and lines that I want to write for them, and this was one of them.

I’ve read some really great fics where their dynamic is so much more hostile and yet equally as romantic- I might try my hand at it some day. I know the way I write Sebastian and Ciel may seem out of character to some, but I really can’t stop, and I won’t apologise for it! I trust my gut and if I can hear the words in the character’s voice, I’ll write them. I can’t resist the idea that Sebastian is only really capable of genuine love and tenderness when it comes to Ciel and no one else 🥹

Time for my favourite scene in this chapter! It’s Benjamin the paper boy! Have you ever seen Newsies? The Disney musical about newsboys in 1890’s New York? You should, it’s a cute little story about kids unionizing to fight the corporate man and get better pay for their work *insert long rambling talk about socialism and how I love it so much*. ANYWAY, I needed a minor character for plot reasons, and a newsboy seemed like a perfect fit. And it gave me an excuse to write Sebastian and Ciel interacting with a kid, which I love, for some reason.

(source)

I had to learn about how money worked in Victorian England. Well, I didn’t have to, I could have just bullshitted the few lines about them bribing the kid, but I wanted to have a tangible sense of how much money was actually worth and how the pound breaks down into shillings, sovereigns and guineas etc. I hope all the values work out and make sense because Holy Shit is this the most insane way to break down money. It hurt my head just thinking about it. Not to sound American (I’m not even American) but I’ll stick the good old 21st century 100 cent dollar, thank you very much 🤣

More cutesy stuff in the hotel- I’m writing this in April, four months after the chapter was written, and reading it back for the first time in quite a while is fun. I was giggling at my own writing lol. I love these two so much. It’s a problem.

Poor Lizzy!!! Thinking Ciel died for nothing when he didn’t actually die at all. Imagine basing your entire grieving process on a lie. Oof. It’s gonna be one Hell of a shock for her when she finds out she’s spent the last four years operating on false assumptions.

Thankfully, she has Sybil, who has some secrets and false assumptions of her own.

And last but not least, the meeting of the Evil Dudes. These scenes are so hard to write because I don’t want to describe characters too vividly or put names to any of them, it’s like building a model plane or something, you have to be very intentional and delicate about what pieces (words) you use and where you put them. All of writing is like that, to an extent, except for those moments when it flows super smoothly, but even then you have to be deliberate with your editing. Writing is hard work! I love it so much, though.

CHAPTER SIX: DESPERATE TIMES

Let’s talk briefly about Frederick Abberline!

A portrait of Frederick Abberline, 1885. (Wikipedia)

Fredderick Abberline, as you may or may not have known, was a real historical figure! He was born in 1843, which would make him about fifty-seven at the time of TTNBD. That’s not how I picture him at all, of course, because in the Kuroshitsuji anime he’s depicted as a much younger man than he would have been at the time, as he often is in film and television shows.

I choose to keep a slightly aged version of the anime Abberline in mind when writing, but I like to think of him as having some variation of the facial hair that he does in the picture above- such an undeniably Victorian mustache. And I think with his promotion he wouldn’t want people to think of him as being so young, and he has such a little boy face without it 😌😆

Abberline is of course most famous for his work as the lead detective on the Jack the Ripper case, which is why he’s usually featured as a character in television shows/movies about the Ripper. Though the Ripper was never caught, Abberline was known to have many theories in his time on the case, including the idea that the killer might actually be a woman. *side-eyes Madame Red* 👀

The real Fredderick Abberline was married twice in his lifetime- he married his first wife, Martha Mackness, in March of 1868, though she died of tuberculosis two months after the wedding. Then, in 1876, he married Emma Beament. They were married for over fifty years until his death in 1929 at age 86. Emma died three months after he did, and was buried with him at Wimborne Road Cemetery, in Bournemouth, England. They never had any children.

His grave is marked by a headstone erected in 2007, and I think it’d be neat to visit his grave some day, if I ever get the chance to go to the United Kingdom (it’s at the top of my list of places I want to go).

I’ve referenced Abberline’s personal life a couple of times- he mentioned Emma in his diary entry back in chapter one, and it’s walked about how he likes to spend mornings with her on the weekend. Obviously, not much is known about the details of the real man’s personal relationships, but I like to think he and his wife loved each other very much, because there’s no evidence to the contrary and it hurts no one for me to believe that. Abberline works hard and he’s a good guy, he deserves happiness.

Quite rude, then, for someone to make him get up at the crack of dawn on a Saturday to solve a murder. Even worse, Alois and Claude are here! So we get some more wonderful outsider observations from Abberline, and he of course can’t help but compare their dynamic to Ciel and Sebastian’s, which means I get to vicariously get to wax poetic about my thoughts on the matter.

Meanwhile, Sebastian and Ciel are perched on a rooftop, quite literally eavesdropping. Imagine their surprise when a young lord shows up- with his demon butler in tow.

Ciel: That bitch stole our look!

Sebastian: We wore it better.

😂😆

Unfortunately, Ciel decided he was going to follow Claude and Alois around- but he isn’t as good at staying hidden as Sebastian is- he doesn’t have the experience, and I personally think he doesn’t have the same affinity with the shadows that Sebastian does- so Claude catches his scent rather quickly.

And Claude is a thirsty hoe. It makes my skin crawl, writing the things he thinks about Ciel. But that will make his inevitable demise all the more satisfying, I hope. I took his obsession with Ciel straight from the anime and just cranked it up to ten. I don’t know if everyone reading this story has seen season two- I know a lot of people don’t like the liberties it took with canon. Alois and Claude are characters completely made for the anime, and I think that makes them perfect to muck around with. There’s so much less established canon for them, I can just chop and screw and remix it however I want. It’s a fic writer’s dream.

After finishing To the End of Everything, and describing Ciel’s grave, I realised that as a member of the nobility, it’s more likely he would have been buried in a mausoleum, a stone building with niches in the walls for the caskets of the dead, where members of one family are interred. But I had the idea for Ciel’s tombstone and the engraving on it from the time I first decided to write TTEOE, so I wouldn’t change it even if I could.

And maybe an in-universe reason for it was that Ciel had decided to do things differently, maybe putting in his will for him to be buried like that was a final act of rebellion. And in the end, there was no body there anyway. Humans and they death rituals, putting markers on empty graves. I find it fascinating.

Changing topics: one thing that I hade to get used to was Sebastian calling Ciel by his first name. you’ll notice he doesn’t do it super often. He can’t call Ciel my lord or sir anymore. I mean he could, but that would be worse in my mind. He’s not really Ciel’s servant anymore. But I have Sebastian use Ciel’s name sparingly. Partially because it still feels a little weird and because I find it WAY more likely that Sebastian would be hitting Ciel with the terms of endearment, which you’ll notice I have him to constantly. A: because he loves Ciel and is stupid about it and B: because even though Ciel is used to it, and even likes it, it probably does still annoy him Just A Little, and that’s also too tempting for Sebastian to pass up.

Sebastian is no stranger to committing crimes in service of Ciel’s investigations- now he’s going around stealing records from the government, which is probably the least of his illegal actions. The Public Record Office is a real place, and in 1900 it was indeed located in Chancery Lane, in London. It was established in 1838 to house and catalogue all kinds of court/government archives, documents, things like that. I don’t think it had any archive specifically for newspapers, but let’s just all collectively pretend it did.

“I can’t believe I married a criminal” will forever be one of my favourite lines to ever have written. Ciel’s romantic side is very suppressed, but it’s there, so the times when I get to make him verbally reference Sebastian as his lover, husband, mate- those are particularly sweet to me. Even if he does immediately follow up by calling Sebastian a dog and a scoundrel, which, to be fair, are also accurate things to call him.

Writing a sex scene is the most intensive part of the craft for me. The thing I spoke about earlier, about being surgical and methodical in word choice and grammar- that’s dialled up to eleven when I’m writing a sex scene. So sometimes I fade to black. Although, that can be nice too- leaving things to the imagination. Also, it means I have the option to come back some day and write them out huehuehue 😏😌😉

I have never attended a séance. I was raised in a rather conservative Christian household (and look at me now) and I was always taught never to mess with that stuff, that it might invite evil into one’s life. Due to personal experiences among other things, I still have a belief in the spiritual aspect of existence- maybe not demons and ghosts per se (though I do have stories of ghost encounters in my past), but that there is such a thing as the soul, and life beyond death, and forces beyond what we humans can fully comprehend or control.

Though I’ve left behind almost all the beliefs I was raised with, at least one remains: I don’t fuck with séances or Ouija boards or anything that could accidentally bring something bad into my space. You would never catch me in a horror movie scenario, is what I’m saying  😆

However, the realm of fiction is fair game. Especially for the sake of the narrative.

Séances in film always seem to be done slightly differently- usually there’s a table, and a candle or something- I kind of just set up my own scenario.

Someone asked me why Lizzy and Sybil didn’t just try to summon Edward’s spirit right away- to be completely honest, it’s mostly because it didn’t occur to me 😅. But I also think that Lizzy wasn’t ready to confront whatever truths he might have to tell her- or that the grief was still so fresh, she wouldn’t have been able to bear seeing him- or not seeing him, if it hadn’t have worked for whatever reason.

Instead, I chose to tug on a different heartstring entirely and chose to have them summon Tanaka. Tanaka is beyond old, and I think after Ciel died and the manor burnt down, he finally allowed himself to put down the burden of being a steward to the house of Phantomhive. He deserved a rest. I think his death would have been painless- he probably went in his sleep. The Midfords would have taken good care of him.

And of course, he would be against what Lizzy is doing. Not angry with her, but worried- he would want her to move on, to put everything behind her and live a normal, happy life. But she doesn’t really have a choice at this juncture- desperate times and desperate measures and all that. I knew from the beginning that Tanaka wasn’t going to be alive in this story, but I still wanted to give him a cameo, however bittersweet it may have been.

I do hope the séance scene was sufficiently eerie- I don’t really write horror, or anything that’s meant to be all that scary, but I did try to give this scene a little bit of a spook factor. One of the ways I try to do that is by limiting descriptions of things until the moment after they happen, and

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As a way to control the pace and rhythm of the scene. Prose is like a rollercoaster, or a run on a treadmill. You must have moments when your heart rate spikes and in between periods to cool off. I try to do that- I’m not sure how well I always achieve it, but that’s the idea.

One of my favourite things I like reading in readers’ comments are the reactions to the revelation of new information, i.e. that Sybil’s mother was a witch. The burden of being the writer is knowing things ahead of time, and not getting to discover them at the same moment your audience does. Coming up with the idea and executing it is its own reward, but sometimes I wish I could read my own writing like it was something I’d never seen before. That would be so cool. So know that as a reader, the best thing you can do is comment your reactions on stuff because it’s the closest that authors can come to that feeling!

Lizzy and Sybil trying to summon Ciel and not being able to because he isn’t dead was another idea I had right from the inception of this story. Since Ciel is a demon, however, and is therefore connected somehow to hell, or the afterlife, or the supernatural world in general, I imagine the séance would have some sort of pull on him, which is why the interjection of him waking up in bed feeling like someone was calling his name.

Lizzy and Sybil complete each other- they have the idea of summoning Sebastian at the same moment, and even if they hadn’t, one of them will always end up enabling the other. Heaven help anyone who gets in their way, they just won’t be stopped 😆 😆 Even if it does eventually get them in over their heads. But that’s another chapter for another blog.

See you next time!

[circulars-reasoning]

Each Community Has It's Problems...

In particular, this post is going to address my time in the pro-endo community. JAS made a very good vent post in 2021 about some of those issues, explaining how it created some distaste for him for endogenics in general. It's been circulating again and I wanted to add on a few things. Thought I would make my own post, though, as my thoughts are separate from his.

This post isn't as nuanced as they always will be, but I wanted to be able to share these things. Anyone is allowed to interact with this post!

First off, this phrase "plural is what you want it to be" is something I see on a daily basis in the inclusive servers I'm currently in, and it's something I saw quite a bit in the plural spaces I used to be in. Essentially, "plural" as a label is for anyone - singlets included - so long as they feel the term is "right" for them, or helps them.

I have an innate distaste for this. The reason I do is because of how that mentality was used to hurt and abuse me repeatedly, as a now diagnosed DID system.

When I first joined plural spaces, I was constantly fucking fakeclaimed by pro/endos. I was constantly told I was autigenic, that I was mixed-origin at best, that my trauma "wasn't enough" - because I couldn't describe any. But it wasn't fakeclaiming the likes of what we see on FDC. It was "loving" and "caring."

I express needing desperate help, because I'm having panic attacks and have no idea why. "Have you considered it's your autism and you're melting down? Is someone else internally stressed about school?" No, I was having flashbacks to my trauma and instantly forgetting what I had seen in my mind, because I wasn't ready to see it. So I sat, and puzzled, and accepted that I Was Just Like This. After all, everyone else around me was "just like that," and they had their own strategies to help them - none of which seemed to help me. So I became incredibly defeatist. I believed I was just going to always be a dysfunctional plural, because I couldn't lock away my alters like was suggested. I couldn't push away the trauma stressors in my life.

Plural spaces inherently encouraged me to ignore my trauma, because they offered a million different options for what I was actually experiencing. And it was like being traumagenic was taboo - if you were traumagenic, you were pushed away into a corner, told you could party with the rest of them if you kept it under wraps. I join servers to this day where discussions of dormancy, splitting, integration, and fusion - all incredibly fundamental parts of my disorder and healing from my disorder - are part of blacklists. "We don't want to trigger anyone!" Have you considered what you're actually doing is blacklisting the healing process those like me require? Integration is inherent for healing from DID, but it's blacklisted in numerous servers I've seen and subsequently left.

The endogenic community strongly encourages further dissociation as well. Alters should be different; distinct. I've seen it encouraged to watch new media to "make new fictives." Source-calls encouraging introjects to connect deeper to sources, even date random strangers who "are from the same source" (not a thing). Everything I've seen in plural spaces focuses on being, well, Multiple People, and supporting that strongly - and working against that goal is frowned upon (i.e., final fusion being discussed as being death).

Those spaces also incredibly support unhealthy coping mechanisms for those like me who have DID. Maybe others are finding good resources out there in plural spaces, but... I'll talk about dissociation and be linked to PluralPedia. I'll ask about how to stay awake on a long drive, and be told "just force yourself to rapid switch, because a new alter will be fresh and awake!" (Hello, crashing my car).

I think that's as much time and energy as I have today. I just... I definitely understand the unease. I have been so greatly hurt in endo spaces, and while the inclusive spaces I am in now are better than those I was in previously - with more acknowledgment that those who say they have a disorder should be believed - there are still problems with Everything Being Valid If It Helps, with no recognition of the fact that, when you're maladaptive already, hurting yourself badly can look a lot like helping.

[council--board]

Status -> Stimboards: Open -> Doodles: Open -> Icons: Open

Doc w/ each anon and request

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-> please refer to me as v2, pebbles or willoh. I use he/him pronouns and I'm aroace. I'm a french canadian user

-> interests for anyone curious. this updates from time to time

-> be patient with me if you send requests. I am tired all the time and I sometimes get too busy to work on boards

note: I can't work on anything that requires me to open wikis to get images if I'm on my laptop since the wiki lags. this just means I'll take a bit longer to get to some requests so you're welcome to provide me with an image [could just link it or send it via dms if you'd wish to remain anonymous in the asks]

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-> main blog is @willohthebug

-> I also run @ultrastim [ultrakill related] and @sliver-board [rain world related]

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-> anons are allowed to sign off with a name or emoji which will be recorded on a notes app + a post on here. I sometimes may ask for anons to provide pronouns so I don't accidentally misgender someone when talking about them

-> guide that I made to help

I will do: -> Original Characters -> Oc x Oc / Canon x Canon / Oc x Canon. I welcome ships -> Kin stimboard -> LGBTQ themed boards -> Animals -> Fandom characters [catified designs / your own designs are welcome!] -> Fandom specific -> Gift stimboard

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Fandom Specific would be asking me to create a stimboard based off Undertale and not a specific character from the game

ships are only welcome if they're fine to do. if you ever see me do a ship board where it's problematic, please inform me and I'll get rid of it. I try my best to do research on canon x canon to make sure nothing is bad

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I won't do: -> Spiders -> Soap Cutting -> Water Slime -> IRL people

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• I won't be recolouring gifs because it's a pain in the ass

• IRL people only applies to like actors, youtubers, etc. you get the idea. HOWEVER, characters from a tv series or a movie is fine since I’m not directly doing the actor

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Maybe: -> Bugs [it depends which ones]

-> this is a general stimblog! I do multifandom stuff and I'll allow pretty much anything

-> regarding fandoms: I don't care what fandoms you wanna request, I'll do the ones I'm comfortable with. I ask that you specify the fandom when requesting fandom characters so I don't get the wrong thing

-> requesting a kinboard is simple, just inform me it's a kin and i'll tag it. you're allowed to ask me to tell people to not tag it as id/me/kin if needed

-> " [character] x [character] " to me is a ship while " [character] and [character] " isn't one. you're allowed to specify ship or not in your request if needed but this is how I write them down. I don't understand people going " [character]/[character] " so it takes longer for me to do it

-> if you want me to use a specific image, I'll ask you to please provide it for me because sometimes it would involve me needing to hunt it down and I never find it in the end sometimes. I look at the wiki more than I try to look directly into the source [due to some sites not allowing screenshots yknow]. I will not accept fanart that isn't made by you without clear permission from the one who created it so I prefer if only official art was handed over

-> please be specific on your themes, you're allowed to not request any themes and let me choose everything but in most cases it takes me longer + me doing a ton of research

-> I do three characters max into one stimboard as more would look strange obviously

-> you can request multiple boards!! you don't have a limit, and you're allowed to request the same character[s] multiple times even if someone else already requested one

-> I'm allowed to change the theme around even if provided with specific stuff. I only change if I can't find a theme or if I think something else fits. I'm also allowed to deny any requests I'm not comfortable doing or that I can't do

oh what did you mean by [blank] in your posts?

sometimes I add in blurbs when I make my own posts while sometimes I don't

-> for my own benefit - I think this is clear enough but pretty much means the board was created for me

-> I know what you are - I know exactly who the anon is off anon as I am probably friends with them

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can you explain these tags?

-> #stimboard-logs - despite my new username as this is my original one, this is my general tag for anything I create -> #gabriels stimboards - only stimboards I create get tagged as this

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-> Stimboards: " hey could I request a Gabriel from Ultrakill stimboard with themes of wings, gold and swords? " can also be written as " Gabriel [ultrakill "

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-> Ship stimboards: " hey could I request a v1 x v2 from Ultrakill stimboard? " can also be written as " v4v [v1 x v2 ultrakill] " -> if you write down their ship name, please specify the names separately for easier research

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-> Kin stimboards: " can I get a Foxy from FNAF stimboard? this is a kin request "

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-> Doodles/Icons: " can I request a doodle/icon of [character/oc] " doodles can sometimes be actual drawings instead of normal doodle if you request doodles/icons, I will obviously want to be given the ref of the oc

-> what are some requests you would deny?

anything that makes me uncomfortable to work on or if it's problematic in some way then I'll deny it. I also avoid anything that wants me using bright colours or if the character is really bright [which might just be me putting an overlay on it] since bright colours gives me bad headaches

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-> is there anything you won't allow for themes?

spiders, water slime, anything on my " won't do " list really

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-> could I make a blog inspired from yours?

you don't have to ask, anyone is allowed to make a stimblog. I might look at your blog if you do make one though and I'm aware of it

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-> can I ask for this specific thing again?

go ahead! I don't mind

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-> can you tag this for me?

yeah, sure. make sure to tell me if it's a cw or tw because I don't know the difference :[

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-> am I allowed to request a stimboard for someone else as a gift?

YEAH!! please do, these are fun to make