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#stuck in a perpetual state of “do they know what theyre doing”
fuyuesu · 1 year
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i think hospital unit should upload their songs on the internet nightcord style. iv wld organize their songs and compose most of the lyrics eichi wld happily provide equipment provided they can... somehow. fit that in a hospital room and saki shares as much knowledge on playing instruments as she can BUT. the kicker is they all think the other person knows more abt the field than they do and theyre stuck in a perpetual state of "i have no idea what i'm doing but the other two are looking at me with starry eyes so i might as well try"
im ltierally going to fuckign eat them theyre literally usjt doing their bests with the resources they have and expressing themselves in the only way they know how . Sorry im normal about them
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a-memoir-of-me-blog · 7 years
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control the population. population control. keep them at animal like behaviors. keep them asleep? yeah...no. if it affects the economy of the country you live in...it affects you! <3 but ofc....use the system to your advantage, always. lol. am i katniss
Yeeeooooo. They were on this since 1960s. Under "Subsistence Agriculture" heading. It says "the us and other industrialized countries sought to move farmers "beyond" subsistence into industrialized production as a part of development programs in 1960s"
They fucked knewwwww. They're developing hydroponics and vertical farms and NASA is working on making places on mars for this. And the population control had to come to a halt because too many people being born and not enough food. Bruhhhh
"A return in subsistence agriculture has taken hold in parts of the world where farmers feel production for the global market has not benefitted them either financially or culturally (and it's bad for their health with all the Monsanto shit). For example, indigenous people in the southern Mexican states of Oaxaca, Chiapas, and Guerrero have largely returned to subsistence agriculture. The nation reported in 2010 that Zapatista farmers have "in effect chosen to withdraw from the national economy, some weaning themselves off expensive chemical fertilizers and subsisting on corn they can grow, Harvest and barter""
AND ITS STILL GOOD. because ITS FOR THEIR OWN INTEREST. BUT ITS DIRECT TRADE. NO MEDIUM. BRUHH
Omg. Hunger games is fucking real. "Shifting cultivation....primarily found in tropical and subtropical zones where traditional farmers have to abandon plots of land after the soil become infertile".
BRUHHH. The SHIFT. Who's changing this? Who's making the weather bad?! Who's creating these wars to make all the land of FOOD die?! BRUHHHH. POPULATION FUCKING CONTROL
Texts to my first love:
-I fucking volunteer. The hunger games was a fucking warning
-him: idk babe but go for it. Like i have no idea about how and what a farmer in oaxaca, mexico do and shit and honestly really dont care what they do either.
-you should because this literally affects you in everyway (economics...duhhhh)
-him: how
-your health, your money, your freedom to do X Y Z because you are being fed this shit (like their freedom to be healthy...get food actually worth their dollar...etcetc, whole domino effect). There is war over this stuff bc we need land to live and make food and its all about primary means of survival. Literally everythinggggg
-him: who says the supermarket im going to is sourcing from this guy specifically. (omg...lol). Hun this has nothing to do with me fr. hahaha. Maybe to you cause you find it interesting but i know i dont
-no. It has everything to do with you (bc its economics duhhhh). Like literally the ground you are standing on
-him: no it doesnt. Farming outside of the country has nothing to do with my living location or situation
-not them specifically. But in these commercialized places and big agribusiness, they 1) underpay workers 2) keep them out and cant go to family and support them (with already not even enough money for adequate things) 3) their health is bad (pesticides, etc…) 4) their family will have family issues and the kids will also have issues and educational issues as well and are very vulnerable 5) leads to kids acting out and becoming a burden to not just parents but also the economy that they are within 6) the cycle will continue.
Omg. yes it does. This is what makes people sick and what makes land die and what makes food not available and waste water and we all have a war on this…
-him: where in the us do you see this (omgg….third world america. Ppl dying. Ppl getting kicked out of their homes. Its everywhere. It may not directly impact you, but damn, does it indirectly impact you…)
-if you havent noticed, the places war torn and having terrible health and are poor and having issues with their land and bad weather is all perpetuated by monsanto. These countries were the og agriculture that had an abundance of arable land and crops and now they are dying because of food greed. And its so funny bc we are killing the land we are fighting for and we are gonna end up with nothingggg. Bruh. we get our food out there (and that affects food prices and availability). Thats why VERTICAL FARMING and HYDROPONICS and INHABITING mars for that. Because we are literally running out of food for people and water and its all our fault and they cant even go to school because they have to pay for all of this and its just to survive. Like….what happened to having the pursuit of happiness, when all they are doing is just trying to survive, not die on the streets, etc….and its all bc the system and the greed. The greedy white man.
-him: this is on a country to country basis case. Their shitty living situation, education and all this is due to their gov neglect (yeah...neglecting them from being protected from americas corporate greed and their scam…) not US being the sole cause of this. But honestly i dont really for it to be frank. Im worried about actual shit in my life that im dealing with and not a mexican farmer in god knows where and his issues
-you NEED to care for this.omg. This literally causes ALL conflicts because of power issues and if you stand neutral, you chose the side of the oppressor. Power is fighting over needs of resources to survive, right? And people will rob them and hide them because greed and the need to hold power because they are threatened lololol. The powerful one will always want more and more and more (but if you become more than human and dont fall into your condition...then you will give it away. Go make more and more and improve it….) but then they realize they have too much and then will make someone exchange it for a fake ass inflated price with no intrinsic value that wont keep them alive (aka….money and material things) and bruh. Food and water is fucking PRICELESS. We will literally kill for that because it KEEPS US ALIVE. And if they keep killing and also contaminating it, then 1) we will all be bloody af 2) we will have water..but its all contaminated and 3) we will have too much of nothing….and even if things werent contaminated, the balance would be off. We would 1) have too much to consume and it will go to waste, we will be too hype and start having kids at an alarming rate and the baby boom will happen all over again...this literally involve you 100% and the only way i can see this cycle to stop is get out of it. Be more self reliant and community based.
-him: no it doesnt babe...like what 100% involves me is my living situation, work situation that im getting together (he’s moving out to ny for me :’D), school. Like shit that actually is right now affecting my life and i can actually manage and make a change in and not this.
-and really care for your neighbor
-that because the system set it up for you (thats why you need to know how to use it to your best ability and get out) and just continue it on and on and on and keep you working more, keep you held back, keep taxing you more, etcetc….thats like having the farmer work for all the food but doesnt get shittttt for his labor and only people they work under will reap the profits and the food (that they prob dont even want to eat themselves) that goes out to the market and they just keep them doing the sammmeeee thing day in and day out. Farmers dont even get to reap the benefits of their hard labor.
And yes. Take care of yourself now, definitely. But remember to always know the system and take it to your advantage and use it to better yourself. Thats what the system does, it is a literal test. And then you can do more global and huge scale things. Thats what everyone will do. Go thru the struggle of being in the system, find the benefits that are hidden and the keys to get out and milk it so hard and then you can work on what you want to work on for yourself and for others. Because you will only get what you give...do what you wanna do for yourself and others to continue this life and legacy that you have. Thats the give. U gotta give it all and give in to this wholly. And use it to your advantage and all the tools and your own mind and imagination and creation and then before you know it, youre creating your world around you and you dont even realize it...but yes. U give your effort and work for someone and/or something and use their benefit from it and their references (but never get stuck in that!!) and the experience that also happens along the way. Build on your foundation as you go thru it all. Get the good, defend from the bad. Attract the good. Make them want to go to you, and it only works with genuine and care. Thats literally what school and work is for and life. But always remember there is a bigger takeway from this than just the time you are going to sacrifice. Just a lot of people dont know what to take out of it and just study and get good grades and they dont know why they are doing it….or worse, they just start to work and get money and thats it….we are more than money and numbers...we are more than a made up value and we are more than just being in this infinite “time” of “things”. We’re timeless….
-him: thats all i wanna do. Use life experience, corporate experience, life experience all to my full advantage and be able to flourish to my beneift and with that give back fruit of my labor to you, my family, and our family one day. That is an attainable goal i can handle and accomplish
-me: yessss babe. Alwayssss remember to give back to the people around you and your neighbors and your community because theyre the ones who will remember you and care for you and come together for you because they know youre a good person who only helped them. Theyre youre team. Were all on each others team. Lol lorde is woke. I love her pure heroine album
And also be hellllaaaa aware and careful in the corporate world because they can definitely corrupt your mind and the government and the public. Dont become a spawn. Dont let them let you get lost in their sauce and keep you blind from YOUR real goal. They will try to enslave you with their money and their false power giving. So direct a lot of your energy into direct beneficial things. Like thats why im like “why dont corporations/unis/communities, give like not just education stipends, but like stipends that keep their health up” ex google. I think theyre a pretty sustainable and socially and environmentally friendly and conscious company and keep their employees healthy and top notch and best ability to work and not just give them insurance and healthcare (because why take care of it and spend mad money on it when it can be prevented….and with prevention, it is less and you get more out of it…). Like they let them get rest when they need to so they can be more productive and to their best ability and also keep them autonomous so they dont get burnout  and they get a share of their stock so they directly see the benefits going straight to them thanks to their hard work and commitment. And if it doesnt give that, invest money into like...things that keep not just your health up but also the planets. So you can stay away from bad health and then given “meds” to “fix” a “problem” they want you to think you have. And thats why i urge you to stop drinking and smoking all the time.
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w0rrying · 7 years
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word vomit 2
today, and just the past few days have been exhasting. like, do you ever get stuck in what seems like this perpetual state where the same things and feelings im experiencing are the same as the day before, and the day before that, and the day before that even.. like I physically feel like a pile of shit because i finally got a job, but I hated it; had an anxiety attack a few days ago, and haven't been back since.. is it really worth putting myself through all of that just for a host job ? thankfully ive had 4 serving job interviews in the past 4 days and I just want to land one sooo bad. My brother and his girlfriend i feel think of me as this mooch lazy college kid who's getting by off their things, but I promise that's not at all as it seems... Maybe my mom was right.. I've been thinking of maybe getting a cheap apartment with jax anf his girlfriend because we all get along so easily but fuck that situation is on a whole nother level.. a whole nother galaxy even. Today my ex told me that his girlfriend could possibly be pregnant.. and honestly i think this news shocked me more than it did him. Life is changing so quickly, and the thought of my ex haivng a kid with a girl that didn't even date him longer than I did, and she's 5 years older than the both of us.. like idk. regardless of all the shit jax has put me through in the past, he is just one of those few select people i would literaly do anything for, whether it benefited me or hurt me in the end. I would drop anything just to go help this one individual and it's like, fuck. It'd crazy how time changes things, because if you would've asked me a few months ago when I was literally tearing myself down, drowning in the tears i wept for this person, you'd wonder why I'd even give him the time of the day.. and I still ask myself tht. i hang out with him everyday, and he talks to me about her. how can someone be so unsure about the perosn they're with and not even try to fix it? god im getting stressed over shit that's not even directly affecting me.. yet at least
my life is a bottle of confusion and tonight just kind of made it worse. we do certain things in life for others, at least i try to do, all the time. Some, granted, do those types of things more than others. But i believe I play a great contribution to the well being of people around me. But there comes to a point where you have to take a break from constantly thinking an putting others before you, and just do you. And for me to do this, I had to end a relationship. Quite frankly, it was a short relationship. but that really doesn't matter. what matters and bothers me out of everything, is when you tell someone you need to do something for yourself. for your literally mental self, and they still seem to find a way to flip it back on them, and make themselves feel guilty which in turns makes me feel guilty. which i get is your anxieety, but i have that to.. an life is shit and sometimes we hurt people along the way, but sometimes the hurt isn't intentional. it wasn't for this case. and while this person meant a lot, and obviously still does. sometimes people do things, and while it may've been an irrational reaction to something, nevertheless does it change the fact that you thought and said those things about me. When in a million years i would never jump to such rash concluions or say such spiteful things. I am not one to hold grudges, but sometimes people go too far. and sure,youy may not have meant it, but sweety you said it. and you can't take back harsh accusations like that. at leas not easily, with me.
so maybe certain people who you initiallly thought would be there for the long run turned out to be there for a quarter of the mile. and yeah it sucks, both sides sucks.
but idk, maybe you were just a sstranger afterall,who only took interest into finding the things out about me that they thought they could fix or were intersting. because talking about shit tonight, you don't know me. maybe I never knew you. and if you're reading this, which I guartnee you will be... this is not an attack like you did to me. I'm not jumping to conclusions. I've picked up on these things and quite frankly theyre easy to tell. ive said sorry,you;ve said it too. but sorry can only repair so much... and the fact that you talked to your ex that you "hated" about us??
the space you seemed to be giving me was helping because im trying to find myself. but you claiming to be "checking up on me" is not the sane as going through mutiple of my social medias, seeing one picture, and accusing me of shit that if you relly knew me, you'd kno I never do.. so with all of that, honestly, good ridiance. because i just dont think at 19 i can handle and be putting myself throgh this. not again, not another relationship. i cant.
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