#suplexed that fuckin priest

[hircinesanters]

Will never forget that in my first ever Skyrim play thru my first mission from the companions was to beat the shit out of Maramal for not paying his debt💀

[cerastes]

With all these Belmonts, is there a concise family tree?

Concise, yeah, though not all the details are filled, and some stuff has been left open-ended or simply not enough information was given. The traditional timeline’s canon Belmonts, and their tree, is as follows:

The short answer is Leon -> Trevor -> Christopher -> Soleiyu -> Simon -> Juste -> Richter -> Julius.

The long answer is

Leon Belmont (Lament of Innocence): The earliest known Belmont who went into a vampire fortress alone and unarmed to beat the absolute crap out of whoever it is that kidnapped his wife in the year 1094. A baron who was widely believed to be the strongest knight in Europe, he started the Belmont Clan’s tradition of killing vampires and respecting women. Quotes of his include “I’ll kill you and the night!” and “Mark my words, from today on, I and all my descendants will not give you peace! The Belmont Clan will hunt the night!” which proves that people named ‘Leon’ in PS2 era games are just treasure troves of quotes, and not small time. Actually didn’t fight Dracula! He did best Death, though. He was engaged with Sara Tantroul, but during the Mess that happened during Leon’s adventure, as she was dying, she infused her soul with the Whip of Alchemy, turning it into the Vampire Killer. This means that every Belmont is practically swinging their great great great grandmother at Vampires to beat the utter piss out of them and she couldn’t be happier. Leon later married an unknown woman, which I hope wasn’t too awkward for his now Whip Wife.

Trevor Belmont (Castlevania III and Curse of Darkness): Almost 400 years pass, and in 1476, Trevor becomes the first Belmont to defeat Dracula, alongside future wife Sypha Belnades (a powerful spellcaster from the magic-focused Belnades Clan) and close friends Alucard (that Alucard, Dracula’s son) and Grant Danasty (a noble thief from Wallachia), and then assists a Devil Forgemaster that defected from Dracula’s service named Hector (a very strong and good boy) kill Dracula after Bad Vlad resurrected prematurely. Although an incredible warrior proud of his skills, he is also cautious, and kind of a rude jackass but he has a heart of gold. Has a REALLY good boss theme for when you have to fight him. He also starts in the Castlevania Pachislot game, which has a soundtrack too good for a fucking pachislot game, what the hell.

Christopher Belmont (The Adventure and Belmont’s Revenge): Around a hundred years later, in 1591, Dracula resurrected tougher than ever. Luckily, Christopher Belmont, great-grandson of Trevor, was lifting pretty much every day, so he went and clowned on Dracula. He was very happy about this, and he also very happy that 15 years after this fight, Soleiyu Belmont, his son, was coming of age as a Vampire Hunter. He was going to give him the Vampire Slayer, as per tradition, to make him the main Belmont, BUT THEN, Dracula, the tricky willy, HADN’T ACTUALLY DIED from the fight with Christopher, and had just been left very very weak, but due to this, he couldn’t do anything, so he possessed Soleiyu to recover his power, which Christopher DIDN’T LIKE, so he went at him again. After defeating his son Soleiyu in a duel and freeing him from Bad Vlad’s influence, he went and beat Dracula SO HARD that he did die this time, and for a while at it.

SIMON FUCKING BELMONT (Castlevania, Simon’s Quest, Super Castlevania IV, Harmony of Dissonance, and Chronicles): THE LEGEND HIMSELF. Simon Belmont, the hero of the very first game, and thus, the “first” Belmont in that way. Simon grew up hearing stories and legends of his lineage’s finest feats: His ancestor Trevor, his great-grandfather Christopher, even his grandfather Soleiyu, and always felt anxious of whether or not he was worthy of the name Belmont, worthy enough to be in such a kickass family, always wondered if he would be able to stand up to the expectation. A chance to find the answer to that question would come in 1691, when Dracula revived AGAIN, and Simon, age 22, who had spent his whole life training and becoming a monster truck gijinka, went and absolutely fucking eradicated Dracula, just gave him those kind of punches that send you to another side of the map, blew him across his own throne room as if he was on 200% damage in Smash Bros, just pulverized him. Dracula, however, managed to inflict a wound on his back, and he cursed it with his dying breath. The wound never healed, and Simon just kinda accepted that.  7 years pass and Simon’s all bummed out ‘cause he’s gonna die from this one little fuckin’ nick on his back, when a Mysterious Woman tells him “hey, find Dracula’s body parts and burn them to heal your curse” and he was like “sounds good to me”, so he did, assembled the parts, and ended up reviving Dracula, who immediately looked at Simon and went “Oh bother” before Simon unleashed the mother of all beat downs on him, tore him apart AGAIN, and now burned dismantled Bela Lugosi-looking mother fucker for good measure. This undid the curse, because exorcisms and blessings are weak and inferior to some good ol’ ultraviolence. The Belmont Clan was kinda ostracized before this because people were afraid of their superhuman power, but Simon’s feat of kicking Dracula’s ass, and then reviving him so he could kick his ass even harder was so awe inspiring that the people were like “that’s pretty cool dude!” and now they loved the Belmonts, and Simon became a legend, and a village formed around the Belmont Clan household out of respect for them.

Juste Belmont (Harmony of Dissonance): ...And in this village is where Simon’s grandson, Juste, grew up! Even among Belmonts, Juste was particularly powerful due to his immense aptitude for magic in addition to his factory setting Belmont Strength, owing to the Belnades blood in his lineage. In 1748, his best friend, Maxim Kischine, wanted to prove he was stronger than Juste, so he emulated Simon’s feat from 50 years ago and collected all of Dracula’s body parts (which should have burned but Dracula is tenacious HOW MANY TIMES DO WE HAVE TO TEACH YOU THIS LESSON, OLD MAN), EXCEPT despite being a formidable lad, Maxim was nowhere near Simon levels of strong, physically or spiritually, so he got possessed by Dracula’s influence, lol. Not Dracula himself, though, he was still VERY dead after Simon got done with him, but his influence lingered in his body parts. Juste is also a very successful IKEA employee and loves interior design, skills he puts at good use in a room in Castlevania for some reason unknown to everyone but him. Despite his kitsch tastes, Juste, as said before, is VERY STRONG, and so he beat the influence right out of Maxim and then killed it AGAIN outside of Juste, all while traversing a physical Castlevania and a spiritual Castlevania brought to quasi-existence by Maxim’s psyche, all the while rescuing their mutual friend Lydie Erlanger. Fun Fact! What Juste kills is Dracula’s influence, not Dracula himself. The final boss, Dracula Wraith, is just the manifestation of his influence after draining power from Maxim (as formidable as the real Dracula, but not actually Dracula), making him and Leon the only two people in this list that didn’t actually kill Dracula. He then likely marries Lydie and they have a no doubt very beautiful home hand-decorated by Juste himself.

Richter Belmont (Rondo of Blood, Symphony of the Night, Nocturne of Recollection, Portrait of Ruin): Richter is either Juste’s son or grandson, we don’t know, but what we do know for sure is that he’s made of something harder than the strongest metal known to man. He is VERY strong, and said to be The Strongest Belmont, period (at least until Julius). Dracula revived again SIGH and ordered a bunch of women to be kidnapped to be sacrificed to him, which included Annette, Richter’s girlfriend. Richter kinda doesn’t like this, so much like Leon, he goes absolutely ballistic on 1792 and embarks on his quest to kick vampire ass. Unlike Leon, however, he does bring weaponry. On his path of asskicking, Richter rescues fellow Vampire Hunter and distant relative of the Belmont Clan, Maria Renard, and if you’ve been following this post, you’ll know that just one Vampire Hunter is VERY strong, WELL IMAGINE TWO OF THEM NOW. Holy SHIT, they just fucking suplexed the entire castle like Sabin on steroids, satellite lasers have less firepower than this duo. So Dracula obviously loses like the jobber he is, and everything’s ok. Unfortunately, Dracula has a hyper competent sidekick. No, not Death, that guy jobs, too, I mean a Dark Priest named Shaft, who, unlike what his idiot name might suggest, is actually really good at his job. He’s the one that revive Dracula this time, and boy howdy he was going to try again, EXCEPT this time he brainwashed Richter into helping them, and that’s when Alucard, ally of Trevor, bursts out of his sarcophagus and decides to lend a hand in this whole Dracula ass kicking, but that’s another story for another day.

Julius Belmont (Aria of Sorrow/Dawn of Sorrow): The last known Belmont and the strongest. Julius fucks. In 1999, he obliterated Dracula, we don’t know how, we never were told how it went down, but all that is known is that he absolutely did that. He then lends a helpful hand to Aria/Dawn’s protagonist, Soma Cruz, but that’s also another story for another time.