#taylor didn’t write so high school so y’all could remind me about this bitch

[autumndear]

hello hello !! it’s lucky back at it again !! i j wanna preface this by saying my last intro was compared to drunk history and i was also asked if i was drunk when i wrote it ( but in the nicest way y’all ). i wasn’t that time. i’m still not that drunk, but ya girl a little tipsy. there’s the answer 2 future questions. ONTO THE SHIT THAT MATTERS:

disclaimer: honestly everyone involved in mommie dearest ( 1978 / 1981 ) cld totally sue me for this.

background.

triggers: child abuse, mention of illness and death, brief mention of infidelity

ya girl is too invested in classic era hollywood and she hates herself for it so that said autumn’s mother, not based off of joan crawford just set in a slightly different time period, was pretty much considered one of the last greats. as a part of the patty duke/sharon tate/etc. generation when paparazzi were just beginning to get involved in personal live ( we stan elizabeth taylor for this ), she was pretty much... as i said... one of the last classic actresses

and she KNEW IT!!

irene caeden was a hoe for publicity. although never confirmed nor denied, autumn has always highly suspected the only reason irene adopted her was to make her look good.

autumn was made to call irene “Momma Hen” what do u mean mommie dearest?

that said, irene wasn’t... a good mom... honestly at the beginning, her intentions were pure. however, as autumn began growing up and learning how to be more resistant, irene began worsening her punishments

“y’ain’t gonna keep racing me until u win?? ok ig i can lock u up if u want me too....”

“y’ain’t gonna keep playing this game of strategy against me until u win?? ok ig i can force u 2 stay up all night and day staring at that board not sleeping with a surveillance camera placed right by u.”

“y’ain’t gonna finish ur meal? fine. starve.”

irene could have the best night of her life. she could win an oscar for best lead/best supporting and just be in a total state of euphoria which would pass to autumn. then she would find one thing wrong in autumn’s room in an attempt to reminisce and all hell would break loose.

that’s when the abuse that one typically associates the word with begins – when all hell breaks loose after reminiscing. 

then her mother would grow irrationally paranoid over something that didn’t exist – usually a stain because we’re not original – and would force autumn to work on it with her. she cleaned her rooms perfectly. there was no stain. but she helped her mother, now vulnerable for some reason, nonetheless.

their best moments of connection were when irene was putting autumn through hell, because she was going through her own.

that’s fucked!!

naturally, the older she got, the worse their battles became.

when she graduated high school, she was proposed to by a young man named charlie (i accidentally called him mark once in the biography oh my god i hate myself). she planned to move in with him and begin studying away from home. 

irene didn’t like this plan. she made sure a tempting young woman introduced herself to charlie and and proceeded to seduce him.

charlie took the bait.

when autumn and charlie broke everything off, her mother reminded her that she always knew best!! (ok to be fair... he did cheat ok we’ll give her that even if she set it up he still cheated by his own volition) 

still, autumn wanted to leave the horrible environment, the only good people in her life being the live-in maid and nanny. unfortunately, irene is a very good actress.

irene told autumn that she had been dropped by her studio and that her contract had been lifted – that she was back where she started and didn’t know where to go, financially or career-wise. 

ultimately, she manipulated autumn into staying.

their battles continued to grow up until irene fell fatally ill. autumn took a sort of sadistic pleasure in watching her mom slowly deteriorate,,, and tbh she hated herself for it but,,,

their shared fear made them connect over it.

when she died, autumn was essentially the only person at the funeral who knew her for her. irene had always complained about people loving the idea of her, but not her – the only valid complaint she’d ever made. autumn wished she could’ve been that person, but she was essentially just like every other person there.

when she learned she’d literally inherited zero (0) in the will except for an acknowledgement of all the ‘lessons’ irene had taught her, she decided she would get the last word by writing a tell-all mommie dearest who.

following the book’s success, she decided she didn’t want to live a life of fame and harassment. she moved to boot hill and thought she could become a brand new person!!

-kathy bates vc- LIIIIEEES -end vc-

-marina and the diamonds vc- liiiEEEeesssss -end vc-

working at the funeral home (we stan) reminded her of her past, present, and future. 

marrying the local pastor, a horrible match for her, echoed charlie.

having to be the stern parent of three children reminded her of her own mother.

AND BOY HOWDY THERE IS NOTHING SHE FEARS MORE THAN WINDING UP LIKE HER MOTHER!!

ofc she’s convinced if she ever even shows signs, the one good thing about her marriage to gabe is that he would intervene.

wow i should be ernest hemingway my intros are so much... less drunk sounding than they are when i’m 110% sober.

personality.

wine mom. lives for the gossip. basically helen lovejoy from the simpsons.

a lot more serious than ophelia (in part bc she’s never high lbr). she generally understands situations much better and actually... gauges them appropriately.

has a compassionate side. although she’s largely rational, she is quick to recognize emotion and act. 

has to be the stern parent out of her and gabe. she doesn’t know why they continue having children. they have no passion and she’s afraid she’ll wind up being like her mother.

sad bitch bad bitch (tbh ophelia too but)

honestly the epitome of almost every single lily allen song.

we stan.

wanted connections.

considering i can only come up with unique connections when i have a theme going (like classic movie lines for ophelia’s), i can’t think of anything very unique, but:

someone she cheats on gabe with (gender doesn’t matter)

friends?

people she gossips with/wine buddies

???????

STAY TUNED!!

and then we also love brainstorming.

N E WAY. LIKE THIS OR HMU IF U WOULD LIKE 2 PLOT !!