#tbz hyunjae timestamps

[stealanity]

playlist one , the boyz ( lsg to kvm ) :

ꕤ lee sangyeon ,

someone

⠀

[ 7:02am ]

[ 5:12pm ]

[ 6:14am ]

⠀

ꕤ bae jacob ,

summer love

birthday cake

melatonin

co-lover

white lily

⠀

ꕤ kim younghoon ,

corny jokes

reassuring hands

kinda miss you

i didn't forget

⠀

[ 1:02am ]

[ 2:45am ]

⠀

ꕤ lee hyunjae ,

suffocating ( written serie , discontinued )

this special look

stay

waffle

loser, lover

crazy

too late

only for practice

⠀

[ 9:32am ]

[ 4:35pm ]

[ 10:37pm ]

⠀

ꕤ lee juyeon ,

his s/o waking up in the middle of the night

cute little intruder

bad day, but good boyfriend

daydream

terrible idea

the bet

cold hands

risky

sick of you

⠀

[ 5:34pm ]

[ 10:45pm ]

[ 7:52pm ]

[ 8:57pm ]

⠀

ꕤ moon kevin ,

bad words

the little prince

⠀

[ 3:37pm ]

[ 11:23am ]

⠀

. . . link to maknae line !

[hcuyk]

okay since you're back, may i please request something around 4am with changmin (or sunwoo?) and make it angst or comfort or whatever just because why not thank you my love i'm so happy you're here you don't imagine how much

[4:01AM]

Not often did you wake up in the middle of the night, yet something felt different. Maybe it was because there was a sudden lump that had developed within your pillow or the temperature in the room had changed, but your dream had slowly faded into darkness. As you adjusted to your senses and reality itself, your eyes fluttered open and caught a glimpse of Changmin in the dark.

Your eyes traced the silhouette illuminated by the moon, noticing his eyes wide and fixated on the ceiling. Unsure of both the time and if Changmin had noticed you, you scooted over to where he was and wrapped your arms around one of his, hugging it close to your chest.

“Why are you up?” you mumbled while tucking your nose behind his shoulder, wanting to remain as close as possible. 

Changmin turned his head to face you, slightly startled that you had woken up, but his parted lips of shock curled up into a warm smile—it was almost impossible to not be in love whenever he saw you. He pressed a kiss to the top of your head before shifting in his spot, adjusting so he could bring you into his arms.

“Why are you awake, hm?” He pulled you in close and against his chest, allowing you to snuggle up against him within his embrace. 

“I asked you first,” you retaliated. You gave him an exaggerated pout before having it interrupted with a yawn. He shook his head and laughed at you softly, his arms squeezing you. He then had one of his hands gently pat you on the head, providing a weak attempt to get you back to sleep.

“Just woke up randomly, and I couldn’t go back asleep,” he whispered.

“You better not be bullshitting.” He giggled at your grumble, causing you to shuffle your feet under the comforters and kick his legs when you found them. Changmin then burst out in laughter at your terrible attempt and refuted the action by locking his legs around yours, trapping you completely in his hold. 

Instead of fighting back, your tired state melted against him, but you still glared at him as a threat. 

“I’m not bullshitting, I promise.” Your skepticism made him coo and kiss your nose, watching as your bunched-up facial features began to relax.

“We sleep together?” Noticing your slight worry, he nodded and pressed a soft kiss against your lips to reassure you.

“We sleep together.”

It had taken less than a few minutes for you to knock out, but Changmin was still completely awake. He would play with your hair, tucking strands behind your ear, before his thoughts drifted off once more. He kissed your cheek with a whispered ‘I love you’ before untangling himself from you to glance at the ceiling once more. 

His eyes then trailed over to the nightstand by their bed, and without much thought, he silently pulled out the drawer to take out a small velvet box. He flipped it open to reveal the ring he had bought you and raised it to where the moon was shining, wanting to look at it one last time before officially getting down on one knee for you.

His heart thudded against his chest and fluttered the moment he thought about you wearing it on your ring finger. He smiled and put it away so he could go back to holding you, finally relaxed enough to fall back asleep.

You were his forever, and he couldn’t wait for tomorrow. 

permanent taglist . . . @armysantiny @stealanity @zzoguri @nyujjan @tinisprout @the-kpop-simp

author's note // first timestamp for changmin! (the other one was unhinged and we pretend it doesn't exist 😭). matty my biggest supporter ilysmsmsmsmsmsmsm thank you for sending this in i hope you enjoy ALSO this may or may not be canon kidult changmin 🫣

[chrrybbomb]

[3:00 am] Your gaze shifts to Hyunjae as the two of you walk away from the convenience store. It’s way past normal hours of strolling but the both of you were unable to sleep and he suggested a nice walk. Your trail led you to the 24 hour convenience store where you two ended up indulging in some ice cream. Here you two are, walking wherever in the middle of the night.

You continue staring at Hyunjae in silence before he speaks up. “Don’t look at me like that.” He sounds almost amused as he catches your gaze. You quickly look away, your ears burning up at the fact that you got caught. He chuckles at your quick reaction while you try to come up with something to say.

“Pfft- I wasn’t looking at you.” You try to deflect with an exaggerated roll of your eyes. “I was just… admiring the atmosphere.”

“Oh yeah, of course!” Hyunjae says, playful sarcasm dripping from his lips. He takes hold of your hand and gently pulls you towards him. You stumble closer with a bright laugh and a grin spreads on his face. “Admit you were staring at my handsome face.” He raises his eyebrows at you when you turn to look at him.

“Nope.” You say with a pop of the p and a scrunch of your nose. You turn your head to look back ahead of you as you both approach the apartment complex. The lampposts illuminate your path as you make your way down the sidewalk. You continue walking before you feel Hyunjae suddenly stop. You turn around, eyebrows pulled together in confusion. “Why’d you stop?” He shrugs as he tugs at your arm. With a playful roll of your eyes, you step closer to him.

You feel him rub circles into your hand as he reaches to grab your other hand. “No reason.” Hyunjae mumbles as he looks down to your connected hands, pulling you closer. You giggle as he moves your arms to wrap around his waist, making you hug him. He looks at you with a shy smile at the sound of your laugh. “Just wanna stop here with you.”

“All of the sudden?” You question with a cheeky grin.

“Is it a crime to want to soak in this moment?” He playfully answers back with a grin of his own. “We can just go ba-”

“No! We can soak in the moment.” You let out a laugh as you cut him off. “You’re such a dork, you know that?”

Hyunjae snorts as you speak. “Not as big of a dork as you.” He says as he moves his arms around your shoulders and pulls you into a tighter hug. “But you’re my dork.”

[bus-stop-to-kpop]

[22:32] - Lee Hyunjae

[22:32] Hyunjae came fresh out the shower, wearing a loose white shirt and black sweatpants. There was a towel draped over his shoulders to keep the water from dripping onto his shirt.

"Why are you smiling like that?" He asked when you made eye contact with him from your spot on the sofa.

You patted the spot next to you, " Let me dry your hair for you."

Hyunjae complied with your request and made his way over to the sofa. He sat down with a soft groan, as his muscles were slightly sore from practice.

You moved behind him and took the towel off his shoulder to start drying his hair with soft movement. He started to relax into your touch, even closing his eyes.

You giggled when you realized that his natural curls were coming out. He always looked so adorable with them, like a little poodle.

"Why do you keep giggling?" Your boyfriend asked leaning his head back to look up at you with big eyes.

"You're just too cute." Leaning down you pressed a kiss to his lips before giggling again. He flashed you a proud smile.

You brought the towel back to the bathroom and when you came back Hyunjae held his arms open for you to cuddle into.

While you were gone Hyunjae had turned on the TV, but you didn't pay any attention to what he was watching, rather playing gently with his curls.

[svnzwu]

[ 12:03AM ] hyunjae x f!reader

suggestive cw, minors dni; feedback is always appreciated!

"you're pretty, you know that?"

a small noise sounds from the back of hyunjae's throat, something akin to a protest all caught and tangled into a whine. his adam's apple bobs slightly at the touch of your finger on his neck.

"what," you prod, teasing. "you don't agree?"

slowly, your palm lies flush to his skin, fingers curling around his throat. his breath catches.

you're waiting for it, the switch you've been coaxing out of him this entire time. his eyes flicker in the silence, chest rising and falling, watching for your next move; some days it was easier than others, days where hyunjae builds his walls a little more purposefully, stubbornly, but the anticipation is half the fun, you suppose.

you wonder what will cause it this time, twisted heat pooling in your core at the thought. perhaps the warmth of your breath on the pulse of his neck will make him break, the slightest adjustment of your body slotted against his, or maybe even—you tighten your grip just slightly, and ah—there it is.

almost immediately, hyunjae's eyes go fuzzy, mouth gaping open, the silent way where you know the added pressure on old bruises dappling his skin hurts a little. the way where you know he likes it like that. he puffs out a quiet gasp, hand at your hip going limp and falling to his side, and you truly think this is your favorite part of the game: the prize.

his walls crumbling to pieces onto the mattress, all dirtied in sweat and sin, the hyunjae he prides himself so strongly vanishes, leaving only jaehyun in its wake. the jaehyun that begs for even the tiniest amount of your attention, laps almost pathetically at the slightest taste of you, the jaehyun that all but melts into putty in your hands.

you mouth at the spot between his jawline and ear, thighs tightening around his waist. "i think you're the prettiest, jaehyun. but you know that already."

"please," hyunjae—jaehyun— breathes.

"'please' what?" you ask, fingernail trailing down the hollow of his neck to his chest, down, down, down.

jaehyun says your name like a prayer, breathy and small and pleading with desire. "please, i need you." his voice hitches when you start trailing upwards again from his abdomen.

and if you were feeling cruel today, you'd press him even further, make him beg and grovel before you started to indulge in his wants. the image of jaehyun with teary eyes and pure desperation almost tempts you to follow through, but your own growing desire stops you before it goes too far.

still, you want to have fun before the game comes to an end. you hum in deep thought, playfully distant as you grind your hips against his, a strangled moan finding its way past his lips. his hips jerk up once before stilling at the nails digging into his skin.

how obedient, you almost coo.

"maybe," you say in response, and his eyes widen before you place a hand on his abdomen, eyeing him in warning. patience. your hand trails lower again, a smile ghosting on your lips as your hand comes to rest on his waistband. "only because you've been so good for me."

[1015luv]

[2:11pm] "hurry hyunjae, we'll miss the baked goods if we take too long" (y/n) huffed, almost dragging the mentioned person towards the café. he laughed at their rushed steps, following along with their antics as he shook off the concerned stares along the street. (y/n)'s favourite bakery finally brought back their favourite baked goods for a seasonal promotion after almost three months, and they were excited to say the least. (y/n) was determined to secure the sweet treats since they weren't able to go with hyunjae that last time they were available.

"sweetheart, it's like the middle of the afternoon i'm sure they'll have lots to hand out" he tried to reason, tugging them back as they almost walked into incoming traffic. maybe they were a little too excited.

(y/n) blushed as they stood behind the male, soothing the possible bruises that were forming from their tugging by pressing a soft kiss.

"you're right, sorry" they apologized sheepishly, hyunjae pulling them close to kiss their temple as he wore a reassuring smile on his features.

finally arriving at the cafe, (y/n) let go of hyunjae's hand to go peer at the illuminated glass display case to see the baked available for sale. their eyes sparkled seeing the warm pastries, already imaging what they'd taste like. "which one are you getting (y/n)?" hyunjae asked, his hand finding a place on their hip while peering at the pastries over their shoulder.

"maybe the strawberry cheese tart or maybe the mini cheesecakes?" (y/n) answered, contemplating which one they really wanted to try. though the answer was already settled when hyunjae left his place to order for the two, making sure to add (y/n)'s points card as well.

"hey I was supposed to treat us today" (y/n) wore a pout as they walked to a table with their pickup number in hand, hyunjae chuckling as he shook his head. "no since i was busy the last time you wanted to go together, my treat" he patted their head before messily shaking their hair, (y/n) swatting his hand away with a frown and glaring eyes. they both sat across from one another, (y/n) rolling their eyes as they tried to smooth their hair. "don't do that I wanted a nice photo with the baked goods" they complained, hyunjae smilingly amusingly as he rested his elbow on the table while holding his chin in his hand observing (y/n).

even when the food and drinks came, he continued to observe them with a grin forming on his features. maybe it was how their eyes lit up like it was christmas day when their order finally arrived, or how much (y/n) had to say about the pastries that were oh so wonderful. hyunjae only snapped out of his thoughts when a spoon came into his vision, (y/n) holding it out for him to eat. hyunjae smirked as he noticed how innocent (y/n) looked, waiting for him to try and tell him how it is with excitement in their eyes. maybe the teasing that was slowly bubbling in his mind could wait, as he complied and ate.

"hm that's pretty good, maybe you'd let me taste the other one" he added, (y/n) already going to break off a piece of tart. hyunjae reached for their hand to stop them, his smirk returning on his features as he spoke.

"no love i don't mean with the spoon" lent over and pecked the side of their lips where some remains of the pastries stuck, leaving (y/n) speechless as they blush furiously at the sudden act. okay maybe the teasing couldn't wait till after.

taglist (send in an ask to be added!): likes and reblogs are appreciated ♡

[hanniluvi]

— ✦ OH MY ! - BERMUDA LINE SMAU

✦ SYNOPSIS : Despite being okay with being single, your friend Ningning can’t help but feel sad for you. So, as her job as a matchmaker, she sets you up for a blind date! Not being able to refuse, you got ready for this date … but why is there three men in front your house ?!

⤷ not one, not two, but three guys show up to your doorstep, claiming that they are your blind date.

➷ THE DATES! — model!younghoon , model!hyunjae , model!juyeon x fem!reader

ִ ۫ ₊ MATCH IN MAKING 📄 . . : social media au, non-idol au, blind date au, strangers 2 lovers, fluff, crack.

𝄞 DETAILS — possible random timestamps, use of kys + kms jokes, friends may jokingly bully each other, will add more if there’s anything else!

… INCLUDING . . : ningning from aespa, eric + chanhee from the boyz, sieun from stayc, serim from cravity, yeonjun from tomorrow x together.

☏ NOTE - you may be wondering , um soph don’t you already have oh my posted? well, after putting it onto hold, i wanted to to revamp it a little bit (well, a lot..)! had to do my first tbz smau right!! there will definitely be some changes in this smau!! there still will be the old ver up :) enjoyyyy sjjsjs

and obviously, this smau is dedicated to kayla (whose been asking for it since last year), sia (who was thinking abt stanning tbz bc of this , i am quite honored), sona (obv!!)

STATUS — ONGOING | FEB 26 2024 TO ???

➷ AND THE MATCHING STARTS ⌞ CHAPTERS ⌝

ෆ PROFILES ! the lunatics [y/n] | the famous [bermuda]

DATE 001 — 0 hoes but 100% swag

DATE 002 — THE model trio

DATE 003 — some shady business

DATE 004 — errr is this the set…?

DATE 005 — truly embarrassing

to be added …

note : unpublished chapters may have their names changed!

🎧— dm, ask, or comment to be tagged!

TBZ PERM TAGLIST — @flwoie @haruavrse @bearseulgs @ilovewonyo @wtfhyuck @ineedaherosavemeenow @ilovechanhee @ja4hyvn @vampcharxter

OH MY TAGLIST — @haknom @wonieleles @wvnkoi @tocupid @be0mlvr @nanadreamies @conwunder

[stealanity]

“ ONLY FOR PRACTICE. ” ft. lee hyunjae

genre & warnings : actress ! reader x model ! hyunjae, kinda co-workers to kind of lovers, fluff, a lot of kissing, soft touches, hyunjae's kind of super hot

summary : being the most popular actress of the moment is no easy task, especially when you have to play the fake girlfriend of the new jewel in the modeling crown.

word count : 1,273

« do we really have to do this? » you asked, sighing as if the world were crumbling around you. hyunjae rolled his eyes at your question, arranging his hair in front of the mirror under your visibly annoyed gaze. « our managers advised us to do this, and believe me, i'm no happier about it than you are. »

raising your eyes to the sky with a cry of frustration, you let yourself fall backwards onto the mattress. being the most popular actress of the moment wasn't easy — especially when you're forced to play the fake girlfriend of a model whose career is just taking off. « i'm an actress, i don't need to practice my kissing skills. » you affirmed, staring at the ceiling and letting a grimace disturb the tranquility of your face. a sigh left the boy's lips, which drew your attention. watching him from afar, you suddenly saw him approach the bed, settling on its edge and stretching his neck muscles. you had to admit that the idea of kissing hyunjae didn't really repel you — but rather die than admit it to him.

he was good looking, funny and kind, heart on his sleeve and extremely hot. but he was so self-confident and full of himself that you didn't want to give him the opportunity to know that it didn't bother you. « but we've never kissed, we need to train together to make it believable in front of the medias. » he explained, rolling up the sleeves of his shirt, giving your eyes a glimpse of the perfectly defined veins on his forearms. looking away a half-second later, before he could catch your gaze on him, a pout played on your lips, « why should we kiss in public in the first place? »

a fatally bored sigh escaped hyunjae's lips as he swiveled to face you, his chocolate pupils locked in yours. and without him uttering a single word, you understood what he wanted to tell you so silently — « uh, fine! » you boredly declared, straightening up on all fours on the bed before sitting down right next to him.

the fact that you were sitting on your knees made you look a little taller than him — so, when seen from above, his round eyes seemed much softer than anything else. not knowing what to focus on, your eyes darted between each of his, while your hands, camouflaged in your sleeves, clung to his shoulders to keep your balance. you saw him look away from your eyes for a second, deviating towards your lips lightly made up with red lipstick, and you could swear that the atmosphere around you both had suddenly changed. with bated breath, you leaned forward slightly so that your face was now closer to his than before. before the fateful moment, you took advantage of having his face so close to yours to observe every detail of it : no wonder why everyone was so crazy about him, his skin was flawless, his features perfect, his smile dazzling and his eyes... his eyes were electrifying, bewitching, the prettiest brown eyes you've ever seen. the honey-colored light from his pupils, thanks to the sun's rays, made you want to drown in them.

« it's only for practice, right? » you asked, in a whisper that grazed his half-open lips, forcing him to look away from your mouth and back into your eyes. it was an unreal situation, because it wasn't as if hyunjae was one of the people you wanted to kiss or anything in the first place. you weren't even friends, simply a work colleague with a contract to boost each other's popularity. not like you have time for a relationship anyway — between filming, interviews and previews here and there, your schedule was far too overloaded to allow for any whimsical extravagance on the side.

suddenly, you were jolted out of your thoughts when hands invaded your waist, completely cutting off your breathing at the same time. the friction of his thumb reassuringly caressing your hip caused your heart to beat faster, as he closed the distance between your faces the next second, his warm lips now against yours.

no need to mention the panic in your heart at this very moment, nor to mention the way your stomach lurched at his touch. finally closing your eyes as you feel the pressure against your mouth become delicately firmer, you allowed yourself to melt under the sensation of his lips harmonizing with yours, your hands leaving hyunjae's broad shoulders to settle on his cheeks. he made it so easy — his lips moved against yours in the most natural of ways, his hands gripping your hips to keep you from slipping away, the delicate pressure of his pianist fingers on your lower back to draw you closer to him. maybe you lost your nerve the longer the kiss went on, especially when he pulled away for just a fraction of a second to kiss you a second time, more enthusiastically.

in the madness of the moment, hyunjae drew your body against his, delicately, before grabbing your thigh and pulling you onto his lap, your legs on either side of him. slightly surprised by his gesture — though not displeased — you unclasped your lips from his, giving you a glimpse of the sweet mess your lipstick had created on his damn pretty face. his fingers left your back to place themselves innocently, hesitantly, on the side of your thighs, his fingers grazing your skin, which tingled under his touch. then you wrapped your arms around his neck, mingling your lips with his once again for the sole purpose of training you to be convincing. it was a hot kiss, almost feverish and hurried because of both of your jerky breathing, letting a few sighs escape here and there.

after long minutes of kissing, with a few wandering hands, eager to explore the details of each other's skin, you pulled away slightly to catch your breath. but even after your exchange of saliva was over, hyunjae didn't seem determined to move away from you, his eyes planted on your face like an idiot in love. letting a smile tug at your lips, you watched him tenderly before speaking, « so verdict? is your favorite actress a good kisser? »

it's something he confided in you the day you first met — even if you don't know if he said it to flatter you or if he really meant it. but the fact that he said he was interested in you even before he met you, appealed to you in a way. the boy pretended to think, your lipstick smeared over his mouth and a little around it, and once again you took the opportunity to admire him, your fingers delicately caressing the skin of his cheeks without realizing it. « mhh.. not bad. not the best, but not the worst. » he said teasingly, a smirk forming on his lips.

wrinkling your nose at his answer, which was totally wrong for you, you pinched his cheek gently. « you're a terrible liar, » you whispered softly as he approached you once more, cutting off your next sentence by capturing your lips with his again. decidedly, you had to practice kissing for a long time so that everyone could really believe that there was something going on between you. and with the way hyunjae takes hold of your lips, kiss after kiss, with a little more passion each time, you wouldn't understand if someone didn't believe in your acting..

taglist ( even if i don't think i still have one.. here's the google form ! ) : @quaissants @kimsohn @kyusqult

[hcuyk]

SYNOPSIS : changmin loves you. the happier ending to kidult

PAIRING : daycareworker!changmin x genderneutral!reader

GENRES : established relationship, daycare au, angst, fluff, features the boyz as children

WARNINGS : mentions of car accident and child neglect

TEASER WORD COUNT : 329

ESTIMATED WORD COUNT : 7-10k

ESTIMATED RELEASE DATE : within the next week. i lied its coming out when i get time cause why tf is my college doing sm

TAGLIST : @stealanity @yourjaylaks @wooyoung-a @kimaya2209 @armysantiny @changminurheart @moonieric @sunfics @deputyjuyeon @simpforsunwoo @nyujjan @i6swoo @karsohn @nilesig @twentysixofmays @changmin-wrlds @mavericsohn @lisori @nanamioo @enhacolor @kyswoo @sunwoahkim @jaerisdiction @yunkiwii @ja4hyvn @choielyssa @crazywittysassy @yenart @sleepymoon27 @st1ngrayz — lmk if you want to be added!

A/N : to all the patient people who stuck with me for two years and waited for this very moment. i never thought this was going to happen, but here we are. jeonghan's teaser will release twelve hours from now

K. COLLECTION [J.CM] ONE | TWO

Tears began to stream down your face, unable to hold them back, and you were thankful Changmin missed it, but when you heard him apologize, you turned around and snapped at him.

“What the hell do you even want?”

“I want to talk to you.”

“You had two weeks to talk to me!” you yelled, fighting the loudness of the rain. The stream of tears ran faster down your cheeks as you brought a hand to your forehead, shielding the rain from getting into your eyes.

“I tried!”

“By knocking on my door for an hour straight at two in the fucking morning?! You could’ve called! You have a key!”

“Well it’s not like you tried either—”

“I got hit by a car!” you screamed, storming towards him as the sky reflected your mood. The thunder was just as loud as the pounding in your heart, and the rain poured just as much as your tears. You pushed Changmin, and behind him you saw a crack of lightning. Your vision started to blur as you didn’t hold back your sobs, wanting to show him the pain he’d inflicted on you ever since he left.

“I got hit by a car, Changmin! What about you? Were you hit by a car?! A truck? Perhaps a plane?” You forced out a manic laugh before continuing. “Wait, no, don’t tell me. Let me guess,-”

“Y/N—”

“-mauled by a bear?”

“I can explain-”

“Tell me I’m goddamn overreacting.” You took a step forward, and instead of pushing him again, you stared, making him look at the pain he created. “Tell me I’m overreacting, Jichang. Look me in my eyes and say it loud and clear.”

“I knew you’d be there for me.”

“I missed you, I needed you-”

“I know.”

“The day I lose you is the day I lose myself.”

“I don’t want you to wake up and realize I’m not the one for you. I don’t want that for us.”

it isn't a vae fic if there isn't angst Y'ALL AREN'T ESCAPING 👹👹 if i take longer than a week with this fic, i'll post a second (happier) teaser

it's been two years guys!! i'll be surprised if anyone sees this at all. if you do, please reblog and share, or even give me some support/hype in the comments. i want everyone who wanted a happy ending to see this <3

[from-izzy]

[02:04] | tbz lee jaehyun | hyunjae

» ​PAIRING: tbz lee jaehyun (hyunjae) x fem reader​ » TROPE/AU​: friends 2 lovers (mentioned from backstory!), non-idol au! established relationship au! marriage au! » GENRE​: fluffy fluff, slight angst (?), ​husband hyunjae, he's super patient and understanding, hurt/comfort, wedding vows (it's so cute, i love it) » WORD COUNT: ​3743 » ESTIMATED READING TIME: ~14 mins » WARNINGS (lmk if i missed anything!): mentions of pregnancy, insecurities, mentions of a broken family/childhood (reader's side), proofread once

my second timestamp story! thank you for all the love on the first one! (pst! it's sunwoo! 🦝) hopefully, this one lives up to your expectations! (if there are any uwu). sorry for my weird, unscheduled, random posting times > <

shoutout to my mum who (i bet) went through a lot to make sure i would grow up well. thank you for always reminding me that you don't regret having me and loving me with all your being. love you mumma! 💗

navi/masterlist!!

You remembered when you tucked yourself into bed alone after reminding Jaehyun to come to bed soon. He was so close to finishing his work that you didn’t want to force him out of his zone, understanding that he would feel more peaceful if he finished it sooner even if it meant ruining his internal body clock a little bit for it.

Opening your eyes and taking a deep breath in the calming darkness, you smiled at the arm that rested across your now flat stomach. During your whole pregnancy stages, especially when that wicked pregnancy pillow put a physical barrier between you and your loving husband, he would at least reach out and hold your hand (or particularly your stomach bump), a huge downgrade from how his chest would completely be on your back and he hushes you asleep with his soft snores. 

You knew as soon as you turned your head to the right that Jaehyun managed to finish his work, a neutral smile on his face as compared to the slight pout and the subtle crease between his eyebrows as he sometimes grunts in his sleep from the past few days. An affectionate gaze falls upon your eyes when Jaehyun grunts and scoots over to your side of the bed, his unconscious mind telling him to move closer to his wife after he throws the pillow away to the other side of the room in excitement as soon as your new family arrived home three days ago. You chuckle at the way his right hand past the top of your stomach to hook your waist and pull you closer to him. Now half awake, Jaehyun made himself comfortable by burrowing his nose and lips into the crook of your neck and you immediately looked up towards the ceiling to let him do so.

A satisfied hum comes out from the man beside you, “This is nice.” He brushes the warm skin of your neck with his colder nose and his soft lips press multiple kisses from your jawline to your right shoulder.

“Jae.” You chuckle at his playful nature, “Go back to sleep, hm? You have work tomorrow.”

Jaehyun groans at the grim reminder. He’s been at home ever since you came back home, using up some of his leave days to take care of you and your newborn child. He was about to use it all but you stopped him, convincing him that you’re able to take care of yourself and your child, moreover to save those days in case a ‘real’ emergency does occur. Every day and every moment, you look at your husband who you treasure so much and you can’t help but think about how much you love this man with all your heart, mind and soul.

“Don’t remind me of that, bubs.” Finally opening his eyes, he relied on the subtle moonlight that seeped through your curtains and looked at your side view with ‘that’ gaze. 

‘That’ gaze that reminds you every day that you’re worth it for you. ‘That’ gaze that he kept even after ten years of meeting each other. ‘That’ gaze that was plastered on his face when he went down on one knee to propose to you. ‘That’ gaze that was present when he read his wedding vows and wiped the tears on your face when you read yours. ‘That’ gaze (mixed with immense happiness and excitement) when you told him you were pregnant. 

It holds many meanings and you were sure that the list would continue, building from all the blessed experiences so far.

Only chuckling at the way that he pouts cutely at you, you turn your body to face him, creating a small gap between you both as you press a peck on his lips, “Thank you for using your leave days to take care of us.”

“Of course, I would.” Jaehyun shook his head slightly to validate his point, “You both are my whole world. I can’t afford to lose you or baby.” It was the way that your eyes slightly pooled with tears that he replaced the pout and shushing the soft whimpers that left your now shaky lips, “Hey…what’s wrong?”

Your once small cries amplified drastically and Jaehyun’s eyes widened in shock, quickly pulling you into his embrace. He slips his left hand under your neck, bringing your tear-stricken face into his chest as you sob in his arms. Jaehyun comfortingly whispers sweet nothings into your ear, patting your head and pressing occasional kisses on your forehead. You stayed wordless for a while, enjoying the company and how close your entire body could be now after you gave birth.

“Catch your breath. I’ll be right here.” Jaehyun reminds you between your tired gasps for air, “I’ll always be here next to you, waiting for you, loving you more and more with each passing day.”

You couldn’t do anything but just nod, your heart melting at the sincere words, “I’m scared.”

“Of what, bubs?”

“Like,” You started, audibly voicing out the thoughts that have been swarming and eating you alive inside and out, “what happens if I mess up?”

It isn’t the first time that you had this kind of conversation. The very first time was when the adrenaline from your system was drained after announcing that positive pregnancy test to Jaehyun. You voiced out your worries as an upcoming parent, worried that you would accidentally pass down your problems, anxiety and worries to your child. Out of everything you want the most in the world, all you want is for your children to grow up without your traumas and problems affecting them because that’s not the kind of life that they deserve. Of course, that’s unrealistic. Children are indeed a slight depiction of their parents and how they would act around other people outside the family says a lot about how their parents raised them.

You can just imagine a situation where your anxiety takes over, you crouch down to be eye level with your extremely young child, giving them a lecture about what they should or shouldn’t do, extending that talks to both extreme sides of ‘what if’s and how they should just be more careful, less daring and---

“Jae, promise me that you’ll make sure she doesn’t grow up like me.” It was a desperate plea, almost as if you would walk out of their lives in the next second. The anxiety completely took over your body as you clenched Jaehyun’s shirt in your fist as a physical response, looking up at him desperately and Jaehyun’s eyebrows crashed together, “She doesn’t deserve that, Jae. Those silent cries, hating everyone around me, feeling like no one loved me and wanting to just end---”

“Don’t.” It was stern yet it still held a lot of patience and love. Jaehyun smiles sadly at the words that he has heard multiple times but even so, he would never stop reminding you of all the things he loves about you. He would never stop hugging you, holding your body and pulling you towards him, giving you all his love and company, “Don’t say that about yourself when you’re the reason why I wake up happy every day, bubs.”

“But Jae---”

“You know,” He whispers into the silent yet wavering night. Jaehyun takes a deep inhale of the air, tilting his head to rest his chin on the top of your head, “I was so scared of losing you as time went on.”

You calmed down, shutting your eyes as you focused on his heartbeat to pull you back to the present time. Jaehyun just smiles at the slightly open door of your room and he reminds himself of his newborn child on the other side of their bedroom door. When you hummed confusingly at his words, your husband just nodded, “Why were you scared?”

“Well,” If it wasn’t for the fact that your face was hidden into his collarbone, you would be able to see the blushing mess that Jaehyun was. A deep red blush was on his face, spreading to his ears; but you did feel the warmth on his neck as you kissed his skin delicately and it made Jaehyun more of a mess, “of course if it didn’t work out and you didn’t feel the same way, it would become awkward and even though we were such close friends, I knew that if I was rejected, I wouldn’t be able to spend as much time with you anymore. I really could’ve lost you.”

You never really knew this about Jaehyun. Whenever you asked about the day that he confessed to you to be his girlfriend, he only talked about his plans and how your mutual friends all pushed him to confess to you. You also told him about how the same mutual friends pushed you to confess back to him, yet you were a coward that you became used to telling yourself that if you ever ended up with Jaehyun, it would only hinder him in life; because who would love a broken girl when they could love a perfect one instead?

And so when he confessed, asked for a chance and promised to love you dearly after two years of mutual pining, you didn’t realise that time flew by so quickly that on the sixth year when Jaehyun kneeled and asked for your hand in marriage two years ago, a sudden hit of ‘reality’ (or so you called it) crashed into you. 

You really did find love when you thought for the longest, most tiring and hardest times when you didn’t think anyone would love you as you are. Seriously, how could anyone love you when you were still so stuck between believing and convincing yourself that you are enough? 

“I knew I had to take a chance,” Jaehyun continues his thoughts, “because when I closed my eyes and realised that if I didn’t at least try to make you mine, you might just completely slip from my life. Selfishly as well, I didn’t want to see you smiling in another person’s arms and kissing that person every time you wake up and go to sleep.”

The thought of you two doing just that ever since you moved in together five years ago suddenly made you blush and you couldn’t help but let out a string of complaints. Jaehyun just laughs (and quietly lets out a sigh of relief) when you finally release his shirt, wrapping your small hands around his bigger build instead, “I’m sorry that I didn’t realise that you went through all that.”

“No, it’s alright.” He reassures you again for the nth time in the last hour, “I have you now. You are all I ever wanted.” Pulling away and reaching to cup your wet cheeks, his thumbs swipe your almost dry cheek, offering you that familiar warmth that only he could give, “It’s all worth it in the end.”

“Really?” Another tear managed to slip out of your eyes and you couldn’t help but stare at him apprehensively as the devil inside your mind managed to manipulate your thinking, “I’m such a high-maintenance person, Jae…I really wouldn’t blame you if you wake up one day and decide to just…” He shakes his head throughout your small speech, knowing the similar words that you would say to him once in a while, “leave…” It came out quieter than you thought, maybe because he already knew anyway, hence saying it again and again, the red-horned creature in your mind rejoices as your childhood traumas reminded you of how worthless you are to the world.

Usually at this time, Jaehyun would rebut your words immediately but the silence had your heart dropping and for a while, you thought that you had taken the words out of his mouth. Jaehyun kept his tired stare and suddenly you were aware of your dry mouth as you waited for any sort of words from your husband. He removes the hand that was on your cheek, reaching behind to grab his device from the bedside table, “Hold on, okay?”

For a second, you really thought this was it for the both of you. During these moments of much-needed comfort, Jaehyun has always given you his undivided attention but now as the blue light reflects on his squinting eyes, you couldn’t help but let the tears flow down your eyes once again. Did he finally give up on me? Were the only thoughts that swarmed your mind as you watched how his thumb scrolled and colours reflected on the smooth surface of his dewy skin, “Jae?” Time made you desperate for a response and you were about to clench on his shirt again when he let out a small ‘aha’ and played the video on his phone.

You recognised the scene on his phone immediately without looking. The familiar scene, cheers, whooping and excitement radiating off the background noises had you sobbing again. Jaehyun sets the volume, puts his phone back on the bedside table and gives you his attention again, “My mum was sorting videos on her phone when she came across this and sent it to me.” He presses a comforting kiss on your lips and calms your shaking body, “I’m sure you remember this right?”

You just nod and Jaehyun pulls your face into his chest once again, letting the sound from the video consume you both into your worlds.

“As soon as you stepped into those classroom doors, all eyes were on you and undoubtedly mine too.” You were already starting to tear up just from the first few sentences, “Ah…I only just started…” You scanned your next words, just sniffling from the longer sentences that you didn't know how to not cry to while the audience let out words of encouragement and small laughs. 

Your soon-to-be husband steps towards you, kissing the side of your head, “Should I go first?”

“Do you mind?” You laugh, feeling embarrassed. 

“Not at all.” Jaehyun takes out his paper from his suit, taking the microphone from you, “I already knew this would happen guys.” He announced to the audience and you rolled your eyes jokingly, “Ok…I’ll start.”

You knew very well that your eye makeup was most probably ruined and you looked some sort of a mess at the moment so you couldn’t help but stare down at the floor. Jaehyun gives you a quick kiss on the crown of your head, swooning the audience with his romantic gesture making him chuckle before clearing his throat and starting his vows.

“I remember the day I walked into that classroom on my first day of school. No doubt, I didn’t want to be there. Not just at that school or at that classroom: I just didn’t want to be in Seoul. The sudden move because of my dad’s work made me leave all the memories I had in Incheon in a month and as an innocent young child who was already happy with everything, I didn’t want to leave.

Alas, even my mother told me we had to go and that’s when I knew that moving was inevitable. School work was already hard as it was and I had to move to a big city where I knew no one, having to start all over again from the ‘Hi. My name is Lee Jaehyun. I hope we’ll get along well.’ really made me reach the peak of my mood swings during puberty.”

Jaehyun alternates his eye contact between you and the audience who reacts to the groom with happiness, and laughter as some of his closest friends give him encouraging, funny body language. He points them out and the said friends complain whilst the audience just laughs at the group of boys on the side of the stage. However, it was how you finally raised your head and laughed along that made Jaehyun join in as well.

“For the first few weeks, I didn’t make an obvious effort to fit in. As you know, I joined clubs and did after-school activities. Studying was still my priority at this point but even that became so mundane and boring that I crashed and burnt out after a while. But maybe, the burnout was just what I needed because that was how I first met you. Had I not cried in the corner of the library in the ironically ‘health and wellbeing’ section, would you have even spoken to me? Would you have crouched down and tapped on my shoulder to ask if I was okay? Would you have sat down next to me silently as you read your book, waiting for me to answer your question?

The answer is: yes. Or at least I would like to believe so.

Why? Because no one will fully ever understand how much I love you. Maybe if it wasn’t that day in the library, I would’ve met you later. How much later, nobody knows and nobody will ever know because I’m about to marry that girl who made my day so much better in the library. But what I do know is that no matter when, where, why or how we would’ve met, I would have still fallen in love with your smile, your pout, your laugh, and the way you cutely complain about how I mess up your bubble tea order,” Jaehyun gives you a cheeky smile and you just scoff with a smile on your face, “the way you would cry in my arms when you had a bad day, the way you would drop everything when I have a bad day, the way you would try your best to stay awake until I’m done with my other priorities. 

But bubs, I hope you’ll always know that you’ll forever be my first, most top priority.

Even as we fight, cry and shout at each other words that we don’t mean, I hope you’ll always be able to go to sleep thinking that I’ll still love you. I’ll still be right by your side when your insecurities come by and pass. I’ll always remind you that you’ll always be enough no matter what you do. Your best will always be enough and I hope I’ll always be that person who can be your safe, happy place.”

No doubt now that you’re sobbing and when you look at your parents sitting down not far from the stage, your heart does clench a bit as you’re reminded of your childhood. Seeing them cry over Jaehyun’s words does seem a little bit strange to you as they never really minded your words whenever you were struggling with life. But then you remind yourself of what Jaehyun said to you a few seconds ago.

“I know for sure that you’ll always be enough for me.” Jaehyun continues, taking your mind off your parents as he looks at you understandingly, “I love you and I know I’ll continue to love you until the day I take my last breath. I’ll take care of you even when you’re not sick or feeling well, cherish all of you and be there for you even after death because I love you so much, sweetheart.”

The recording ended there and Jaehyun relished in the way that your body stopped shaking, your arms around his waist securely and your breathing back to normal. He knows instantly that you feel better just from those small actions. He also didn’t miss the smile that grew on your face even though you were literally cuddled up against his body, “So,” the deep whisper from your husband only made you push your face even further up his body, now burying your face into his collarbone, “I just want to tell you that she will grow up beautifully just like her mother. Also, we’ll get through this together. Parenting isn’t supposed to be a one-person job after all.”

Nodding and burrowing yourself into the crook of his neck, you appreciate the way his words reminded the devil in the back of your head as it stomps off in defeat. The words supported the angel that finally won and it replaced the red creature, kicking the red light away to replace your body with a calming, soothing feeling that soon takes over your whole body, “I love you, Jae.”

“I love you too.” The warmth of the night overpowered the chilly night and the two of you held each other so lovingly that the weight of your eyelids eventually became too heavy for you to hold. Jaehyun waits patiently until sleep fully takes over you, fighting his yawn from escaping his mouth. Quietly, he just continued to stroke your exposed waist delicately, kissing your lips one last time before reminding you once more, “Always.”

It’s all very fortunate that your mind is now at ease and that you both were able to sleep after. But parenting duties call about half an hour later when cries are heard from the other side of the house and both your eyes open instantly. You were the first one to untangle your body from Jaehyun and you looked over to your husband who was still stirring himself awake again for the second time of the night as you both sat up on the bed, “I’m sorry.” You kiss him on the lips, cradling the back of his head and pushing his chest back down on the bed, “I’ll get her. Get back to sleep, Jae.”

“No no, I’ll go.” You disapprovingly groan at your husband who managed to push his sleepiness aside and sit up once again, his head hanging down in exhaustion, “Wha---bubs.” Instantly, you pushed him back down on the bed, pulling the blanket over up until his chin.

You adamantly tell your husband to try and go back to sleep. Jaehyun fakes his nod and closes his eyes, an idea popping up in his head as he plots to joke around with his wife. When you swing your legs over to the side of the bed, ready to stand up once more, Jaehyun quickly hugs you from behind, pressing a kiss on the back of your ear where you’re the most ticklish and sensitive. 

You froze at his actions and even though his sleepy voice was still evident, you could also hear all the love that he could offer you in this world with his playful tone, “Race you there, bubs.”

Jaehyun called in sick the next day.

navi/masterlist!!

tags (send a dm/ask if you would like to be here!): @deoboyznet 📢❤️ @k-labels 💙🤍 @k-films 🤎🎞️

[chrrybbomb]

About Me!

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ hello! my name is Rhea and my pronouns are she/her.

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ i’m 22 years old and a senior in college! i’m a health sciences major, hoping to go into pharmacy school!

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ i’m a capricorn sun! please do not ask me about my other signs because i always forget oops

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ i was born and raised in the US but i’m South Asian (Indian to be specific)! English is my primary language and i know some Gujarati and Hindi!

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ my ult boy groups are Seventeen and The Boyz! my ult girl group is Red Velvet! i stan Twice, Le Sserafim, Stayc, Gfriend/VIVIZ, Enhypen, and a lot more groups!!

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ my ult bias(es) are Hoshi (love that man with all of my heart), Hyunjae, and Irene!

My Blog!

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ i will be primarily writing SFW content but i will be reblogging and answering NSFW pics/asks/headcanons/etc. with that being said, this blog is 18+ so please DNI if you are a minor!

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ i will be writing SFW content such as timestamps, oneshots, scenarios, and possibly full-length fics when i feel more comfortable! i will answer NSFW asks and headcanons but i will not be writing NSFW timestamps/oneshots/etc. i have previously written NSFW content like that but my attempts were terrible.

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ this blog will be primarily for The Boyz and Seventeen! i do ult and bias other groups and artists but i feel most comfortable writing with TBZ and SVT.

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ my ask box will always be open for discussions or games or headcanons and i will specify when requests for oneshots or timestamps will be open. i will try my absolute best to keep up with everything but i am a student first!

[oneletterelliot]

Be Awake (The Boyz) – liveblog reaction

I haven’t listened to any of the songs before, or any of the teasers even, so this is a completely fresh listen. I think I know that “ROAR” is the title track, despite the name.

Awake – Kevin with the Johnny-style cringy English spoken word intro! Is this Hyunjae with first sung part? (Edit: It sure is.) Eerie and cinematic; I like it! Oh, I like this beat. I bet this instrumental goes hard. Is Juhaknyeon around 0:52ish? (Edit: Nope, it’s Eric!)  Fast rap. Hello, this “oooooooh” at 1:05, very nice. (Edit: Sangyeon.)  Oh, this spoken bit is kinda doing it for me. (Edit: Ah, this is Juyeon!) I can’t place the “oooooh” at 1:18, but there’s something very distinct about the tone. (Edit: Oh of course, it’s New.) Gosh, I do like Sunwoo has a rapper. I think the vocal arrangement choices made in this song. Wah, the ending felt like it came so suddenly!

ROAR – Whistle? Promising start. Is this Kevin with the opening line? (Edit: NO, IT’S SUNWOO? WHAT!) Ooh, big fan of this bit at 0:27. (Edit: Jacob.) This song feels slower than what I’m used to for TBZ title tracks (if I’m correct that this is the title track). Is this the chorus at 0:52? It’s catchy. Kevin with the “keeping it coming” at 1:11? (Edit: Sure is.) The double-layered voice on this post-chorus rap adds some nice texture. (Edit: I don’t think I realized this was Eric then Juhaknyeon! I think I just sorta assumed it was Sunwoo.) I like the “like the animals” voice at 1:37—genuinely not sure who it is. (Edit: Juyeon!) All of the voices sound good so far, both in this song and the previous; I’ve yet to hear a part that makes me go, “Hm, not sure about that one.” This chorus is sooo catchy. I’m looking forward to seeing the choreography. Oh, hello, change up on the bridge. (Edit: Ooh, I didn’t realize this was Younghoon starting the bridge. I know he isn’t lead vocal, but his voice is really nice, so I always enjoy when he gets point parts.)  I feel like The Boyz often puts rap in their bridges, which I’m kinda into. Ok, I’m not sure how I feel about this crunchy instrumental on the tail end of the bridge. Whoever had this last line sounded very good. Hyunjae, I think? (Edit: Yes, it is.)

Blah Blah – Doesn’t Itzy have a song called this? Of course, this is a peppy song. Actually something about this song’s vibe makes me think of NCT 127′s “Elevator.” “Yummy yummy in my tummy” LOL. Was that Jacob? (Edit: No it was Kevin hahaha.) I think 0:33 is New, has that breathy tone I associate with him. (Edit: Sure is.) Ooh, voice at the what-I-think-is-the-chorus at the 0:42 mark is smoooooooth. (Edit: Ah, it’s Hyunjae. I should’ve known.) Is this Sunwoo at 0:53? Some nice texture. (Edit: Yes, it is.) Smooth voice alert at 1:16! (Edit: Wow, it’s Sunwoo again!) This song has some fantastic light electric guitar. I’m huge fan of the part at 1:34. (Edit: Eric.) Is this Juhaknyeon opening the bridge? I feel like he doesn’t often get bridge bits. (Edit: Yeah, it’s Juhaknyeon.) I’m jamming out on my couch to this (I usually say desk, don’t I? I’m moving up in life lol). This “la la” bit towards the end, very catchy.

Savior – Title feels like this could be a ballad. I am suddenly blanking on whether or not The Boyz do ballads. Wow, ok, I’m enjoying all of the overlapping, bleeding into each vocal arrangement. I can’t even pick out a timestamp for a voice that I want to look up because quite frankly, I want to look up all of them! (Edit: It goes Kevin → Hyunjae (with Sunwoo) → Sangyeon → Jacob → Younghoon → Juhaknyeon.) I can tell that 0:54ish is New though, and then... Sangyeon? building right into the chorus. (Edit: Yep, it was Sangyeon following New.) Okay, ngl, I think chorus was a little bit of a disappointment after that intro / first verse. Ooh, who was that at 1:32? The rock-like strength to it makes me wonder if it’s Haknyeon. (Edit: Nope, i’s Juyeon!) Sunwoo’s rap though... fire. (Edit: APPARENTLY THE FIRST PART IS ERIC! Wow, his rapping has definitely approved – not that he was bad before.) I liked the “Yeah, I’m in danger” at 2:17 – maybe Sangyeon? (Edit: ‘Tis indeed Sangyeon.) I feel like New’s voice is the only one I’m really consistently able to pick out, because his texture is so breathy compared to everyone else. Ah, this vocal arrangement around the 3 minute mark is quite nice. (Edit: Juyeon → Juhaknyeon → Younghoon.) Big fan of the instrumental kicks up a bit for this last chorus. Actually something about the beat with these layered vocals is giving me a SHINee vibe. Funky bass!

Horizon – Ah, a WayV shoutout! Also a very ballad-like title (yes I am biased by the WayV song of the same name being a ballad). Ok, this actually sounds like it might be a ballad though. Pretty acoustic guitar. Is this Younghoon at 0:22? I’ve historically enjoyed his voice. (Edit: It sure is!) The tone of the voice at 0:33 really vibes with my ears. I suspect it’s Hyunjae, but I’m not sure. (Edit: Whoa, it’s Q. I feel like his vocals have improved a lot over the years.) 0:51 sounds like Kevin to me. (Edit: Nah, it’s Jacob.) Wait, could this be a vocal line subunit song? I’m waiting for a rap to immediately prove me wrong lol. Some very nice harmonies. This vocal lilt at 1:16 is so cliche, but I do like it. (Edit: Jacob again.) Ah, yep, here’s Sunwoo with a rap to disprove my vocal line theory. Wow, he’s going low at 1:36, and it sounds good. Actually, wait, could this be Eric? I’m less familiar with his rap tone than Sunwoo’s. (Edit: Aha, it IS Eric!) 1:48 Juhaknyeon? Whenever there’s a voice with an interesting texture, I sorta assume it’s him lol. (Edit: No, it’s Juyeon; I’ve mistaken him for Juhaknyeon a LOT this mini album.) I like this song, but I don’t think it’s one I’d ever listen to on repeat. Bridge: New → Sangyeon, I think? (Edit: Yep.) Lots of harmonies. Starting thinking about the voices I’d yet called out (Q and Juyeon) and then remembered just wow, how many boyz there are. (Edit: Hilarious, because I actually did call out both their voices in this song; I just misattributed them to other members.) That’s too many boyz! Please put some back!

Diamond Life – Ah, another WayV shoutout! JK, I know the titles aren’t actually the same. Ooh, yes, this feels punchy—a nice switch up after the two previous songs. The first (two?) voices make my ears very happy. (Edit: Actually, it was just Younghoon according the lyric video I watched.) This song is supremely my shit. Would’ve gone ham for this instrumental in high school lol. The obvious build up to the chorus, yes! Oh, I think this is Q opening the chorus? (Edit: Yes, it is.) I like this voice at 0:57; I suspect Jacob or Hyunjae. (Edit: Yeah, it’s Hyunjae.) Sunwoo is a good rapper. I like the vocal “hold up!” interspersed into it. (Edit: Actually I didn’t realize the rap after “hold up” was Eric.) Who is this voice at 1:30 immediately after New? Very clear. (Edit: Jacob!) Something about 1:37′s voice is nicely unique. (Edit: It’s Juyeon.) Is this Sangyeon opening the bridge at 2:31? Vibrato? (Edit: Yes, of course, it’s Sangyeon. I think he has the strongest voice in the group for sure.)  Wow, wow, wow. Is this Juyeon at 2:44? (Edit: Sure is.) God, this was a good song. Could’ve been a title track, I feel like. Would choreograph very well.

Final thoughts: The Boyz continue to not disappoint me (the chorus of “Savior” notwithstanding). I feel like TBZ has really worked on improving their vocals all-around; they all sounded good! “Diamond Life” came out of nowhere at the end to steal the position of my favorite song on the mini album. I also liked “Blah Blah” more than the title made me think I would. The build from “Awake” to “ROAR” worked really well, really thematically cohesive imo. A very enjoyable mini album!

[sparkvn]

Jealousy Looks Good on You ⏐Lee Hyunjae

Jealous Soft Dom! Lee Hyunjae x Fem!Reader

↳ Synopsis: What happens when Hyunjae finds your ex trying to get friendly with you again?

↳ Genre: Smut, Fluff, wall sex, possessive hyunjae, teasing, dirty talk

↳ Song Request: Jealous by Nick Jonas ft. Tinashe

masterlist!

"what if we got drunk and kissed and fell in love?" you ask smiling sheepishly at the man leaning on the wall.

It was at a party blanketed by music where he replied, "you're already drunk...so there's that" sliding you a look that was equivalent to calling you an idiot.

You decide to lean closer to him knowing that he'll hold your weight, "well can you give me a kiss anyways?" puckering your lips towards his.

After a soft chuckle, Hyunjae leans down and closes his lips over yours and you circle your arms lazily over his shoulders. Pushing deeper into your lips, he settles his arms around your waist pulling you flush against his body where you can feel his warmth radiating.

Before your insides start to melt you pull from him, "i'm going to find some water so I can sober up before I end up in a bush somewhere", giving him one last peck on his beautiful lips before walking away. Not forgetting to turn over your shoulder to give him one last look.

"water, water, water, where is the fucking water?" Looking through every nook and cranny and it appears that not a single cabinet or fridge has water.

"We usually just fetch from the sink"

A voice startles you causing you to turn around to find a dark haired boy perched up against the counter. Minjun, part roommate and part host of the party. Maybe you shouldn't have eyed him up and down because now he may have thought you were checking him out. You were only trying to read his intentions through his body language. Did you forget to mention part ex?

"uhm- thanks" You closed the fridge and walked to the sink with hesitant steps.

It's eerily quiet when you grab a cup and turn on the tap. The whole time your cup was filling, Minjun had his eyes on your every move. The tiny hairs on the back of your neck start to stand and you could just feel his stare burning into your skin. When you turn around, evidence is all in his eyes when they slowly travel back up to yours. It's like he wasn't even trying to hide it.

Hyunjae turns his chin and finds some male trying to talk to you. Oh it just had to be Na Minjun. The most irritating man in this city who thinks he can get every girl wrapped around his fingers in mere seconds. Hyunjae finds himself rolling his eyes just even thinking about how childish it is.

Now he's watching his girl be his next victim. Goodluck with that. Hyunjae knows your history with Minjun, and he also knows that your heart's only set out for one person and whatever motive Minjun has? It won't go far.

Unless he dares tries something that he shouldn't be trying.

You catch a glimmer of want behind Minjun's eyes and his lips twitch up into a smirk. It seems your ex has no clue that you're unavailable and even if you were available, you'd never dip your toes into that again.

"So.." he starts rolling off his tongue, "it's been a while y/n"

"mhm" Each second that goes by means each second it will just only get more awkward.

"you look good"

A scoff unconsciously comes out. It's unbelievable that you ended up here. It's been two years since Minjun ended things with you and honestly, it was like a breath of fresh air. Come to think of it, you don't know why you kept up with him all those months.

"so you wanna go catch up?"

You sighed aloud and melodramatically hoping he would get the hint.

Yeah, you knew he was the host of the party, but you never predicted he would try to come talk to you like a break up doesn't mean break. up.

Jealousy. It's what Hyunjae's filled to brim with at this very moment. Exterior wise, he may look calm, but he's teetering at the edge of imploding. But he remembers that he trusts you. It's Na Minjun that he doesn't trust. It's hard to blame him though. It was no secret that you are literal eye candy to everyone and you look absolutely fucking beautiful right now in that outfit. Especially in that short skirt. But under all that beautiful, was an even more beautiful person. Hyunjae was the first to actually see you for who you were and no way was he going to let some asshat risk that. Hyunjae knows that you're his, but he wonders if Minjun makes one wrong move, would ending up in jail be worth it. But, it'd be interesting to see how far he can get.

"No I'd rather not," you decide to take a sip from the cup and let the coldness wake you up.

"come on, it's been two year, I miss you and I know you miss me" Minjun has the audacity to directly tell you what you feel. What's changed?

As if you missed that. The more he talks, the easier it is to ignore him. You could go back to Hyunjae right now, but when you look over at where you left him, he seemed to have disappeared.

"Look I don't have time t-" you begin to talk but he quickly cuts you off.

"My room's just right upstairs if you wanna-", Minjun decides to advance towards you, attempting to place his hands on your hips, but a hand around his wrist stops him.

You look up to find a muscular forearm and an even muscular back. Hm the one and only person you had hoped would come by.

"she is not going anywhere with you," Hyunjae pushes his hand back, making Minjun stumble back. A prideful chuckle draws out, "and she does not miss you at all"

"y/n I just-" Minjun tries to make a beeline for you again, but Hyunjae blocks him by standing in front of you. You think it's quite brave that Minjun would still try again when Hyunjae is here now. He seems to not know that Hyunjae would humble him real quick if he doesn't get going.

"I will break your jaw if you don't walk away." He said rather calmly actually.

And it makes your lips curl up into a smile. As much as Hyunjae may seem scary, he is a giant teddy bear to you and he'd never hurt even hurt a fly, unless that fly was hurting you.

When Minjun leaves, it just leaves you and your knight and all his glorious, shining armor in the kitchen. He turns around to find your beautiful smile plastered on your face. "are you ok?"

"of course I am," smile not budging, "but you know I didn't need you to come save me, I can take care of myself" Of course you tell him that, but you'll always want him to come sweep you off your feet.

"I know, I saw you handled that well, I was just-"

"jealous," You finish his sentence for him, "I know"

"Sorry, it's just he just got so close to you, and you look", he takes a step back to view what's his, "fucking hot", he blows out breathily, "and what I did wasn't the worst, I would have sucker punched him when I saw him take a step towards you"

You decide to take his hand in both your hands, thumbing his skin, "why didn't you...I would have found that very hot", trying your best to egg him on.

Hyunjae's teeth shine through when he smiles, "I'll keep that in mind next time some dipshit comes and tries to take my girl away from me". He circles his arm around your waist pulling you up into his embrace and his lips find the crook of your neck. "now let's go home, so we can have some actual fun."

-

Right when you open the door to your shared apartment, Hyunjae wastes no time pinning you against the wall causing your breath to hitch in response.

His lips go right on yours and he takes your hands pinning them right up beside your head. Next thing you feel his his hard length pressed up against your lower belly when he pushes deeper against your body. And oh does it make your stomach loop.

You feel his lips travel down to your jaw and kiss you lightly, then going hard at the base of your throat. Growling he tightens his grip on your wrists, “I don’t like that other guys think they have a chance with you.”

If this is how Hyunjae is like when he’s jealous, he better be careful because you’re gonna want to make him jealous on purpose. It looks good on him.

He bites hard on the skin of your neck causing you to gasp, “I’m going to have to show them you’re mine.” You feel him suck hard and your head thuds against the wall. Quickly, his tongue soothes it over and he finds another spot on your neck.

At the same time, you almost moan at the contact of your legs getting split by his knee and resting up against your neediness. You’re not sure how many marks he’s left on your neck, when he picks you up off your feet wrapping your legs around his waist. Large hands under your skirt groping your ass and soft, careful lips moving up to claim yours. The fingers gripping your ass climbed up higher till they found the band of your panties. And he achingly, slowly, teasingly pulled them down over your plump flesh till he let you drop for you to kick them off. Your heart raced at the prospect of his next move and he hooked his arms around your legs propping you up between him and the wall again.

One arm was tightly wrapped around your waist as his weight was holding you up. He rested his forehead against yours and the air between your bodies was hot and heavy. Hyunjae’s gaze traveled down till he found the hem of your skirt pushing it up slightly. When he finds you wet and glistening, staining his clothed bulge the corners of his lips grew into a smirk.

But you have reasons to believe that he’s just as needy as you when you see how he winces after slightly moving your hips. His gaze travels back up to yours and his dark expression almost blows you out. He leans forward and tickles your now sensitive skin with the tip of his nose. “ask me what I want”, he asks you so delicately. It’s so intimate and careful how he treads his words against your skin.

“what do you want?”

Hyunjae hums against the base of your pretty throat and the vibration only creates a path of shivers against your skin. “I want…for you to only be mine,” he bites on a sensitive spot eliciting a wince from you.

“I already am yours.”

Your boyfriend doesn’t respond for a while darkening his marks on the sensitive spots, “but not everyone knows that.”

A moment passes by when a delirious low growl rises through him, “I’m going to fuck you so hard, you’ll have a hard time walking.” You can hear his belt unbuckling and the movement of him zipping down his jeans to pull out his throbbing length. The leaking tip toured up and down your aching slits till it rested at your entrance, “so when everyone sees you struggling beside me, they’ll know who you belong to,” and he sinks you all the way down till your clit is met with his abdomen.

Your arms lazily circle around his neck and he pulls out of you almost all the way only to slam back into you. Somewhere in the back of your head you worried to what extent is he going to destroy you. But you know he’ll never dare hurt you. He continues at the same pace of pushing and pulling for a while, harsh and sharp till your mind dizzies and electrifying nerves fly through you.

Every movement caused you to whimper and it’s when he hooks both his arms inside and under your knees that he digs deeper into you at another angle and a raving moan rips through you. The pace of his hips climbed up faster and faster, sharper and more pronounced till what’s left of you is just eye rolling and head lolling.

“God baby” he gritted out. By pushing your knees back further he's able to somehow quicken as if he already wasn’t going fast enough.

A feeling starts to unravel low in your belly, “babe-“

“I know, just give me-“ He can’t even finish his sentence, only able to plow deeper into you right at the perfect spot.

Only a few seconds later, “cum,” one last thrust, your body starts shaking under the immense feeling and legs tightened around his waist. Not a second later, he releases his load into you, milking what’s left of him and filling you completely.

After a beat of catching air, he drops you making sure he has you steady and it was his lips brushing against the skin of your neck that caused the most tired sounding giggle from you.

“and by the way...i’m already in love with you”

[halaboyz]

IN OUR NEXT LIFETIME | LEE HYUNJAE

pairing: non-idol! hyunjae x reader genre: ANGST. a cent of fluff. word count: 17k warnings: profanities. mentions of parties, non/alcoholic drinks, homewrecking is mentioned once. notes: this is for the collab event called merry bad ending @junjungsunwoo is hosting !! ♡ + mentions of kidult. this is a kind-of-sequel to it so read it first before this one for a clear understanding of some parts <3

special mentions to my lomls @hvae for the tremendous help & for letting me make a kind-of-sequel to kidult, @mingkii & @moonieric for the support <3 & @fluttering-tbz who I just wanted to spoil :D

permanent taglist: @deputyjuyeon @sunlightwoo​ @teuboyz @90s-belladonna @grassbutneo @skrtbabe @cosmiclele @flrtwoo

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

summary: as he stood in front of you, ready to be someone else’s partner for life, nothing is left but to wish to meet him again in your next lifetime.

｡ﾟﾟ･｡･ﾟﾟ｡ 。 listen now to: spotify. 　ﾟ･｡･ﾟ

Standing in front of the big doors of the church you always dreamed of getting married in, tears pooled your eyes as your hand continued to fiddle with the bouquet in your hand.

“I can do this,” You can’t. Your heart continued to harshly pound under your ribcage, tears pooling your eyes from the nervousness. “You can do this,”

Swallowing the forming lump on your throat, your lips continued to twitch in anxiousness while you waited for the bells to ring.

You were positive bits of the fresh flower’s stems were inside of your nails unhygienically as you continued to pick on it.

“You just need to fucking walk. Move your feet. That’s it.” You keep on encouraging yourself, taking deep breaths.

The day was here.

Hearing the bells, you straighten your back for the nth time and iron your beautiful, silk dress with your sweaty palms and plastering a smile on your face.

The two big doors open together, revealing the elegantly designed insides of the church, and there he was. Still amazingly dashing as he stood beside his best men, beaming a small smile at you. The fact that you were the last on the line didn’t help ease your anxiousness.

You were finally walking down the aisle.

“I was just joking, I can’t do this.”

Inhaling the sweet fragrance the cherry blossom trees emitted, you sigh in relief as your open your eyes to see your school welcoming you.

“y/n!” Eunbin, just one of the many friends you have, welcomes you with a wave from afar. Jogging to her with a smile, you engulfed her in a hug. “I missed you so much, how was summer?”

Starting a small talk to the bulletin board where you find out that you both were still classmates, you head to your rooms with bright smiles on your faces.

“You’re still the same,” Eunbin says with a small smile on her face, settling on the seat beside you.

“And by same, you mean..?” You chuckle, not wanting to take her words seriously.

“You’re still the same old, smiley.. Very friendly y/n,” Eunbin scrunches her nose at you, winking.

“That’s a good thing, right?” You start taking out your things one by one, and you only shoot Eunbin a glance when she nods.

It takes a few more small talks until your homeroom teacher steps in, a fond smile on his face.

“Class,” Mr. Kim starts, taking the class’ attention by lightly tapping his pile of papers continuously. “It’s nice seeing you again. No less, but there’s more.” He smiles, looking outside the door to let someone in.

A man, one who not even the slightest you could describe except as godly, takes unconfident strides inside the room beside your professor. A smile was nowhere to be seen on his face, but his eyes searched around the room.

The moment his eyes landed on yours, you knew you were fucked. Even just a second more than anyone in the room his eyes laid on you, but you could feel your heart skipping a beat and it was never good.

Lee Hyunjae.

He introduces himself timidly, bowing. Mr. Kim waits for him to say more, but the growing silence only makes it awkward.

“Right, Hyunjae.” He takes a sharp inhale, roaming his eyes around the room for a free seat. “Take the seat in front of y/n. Is it taken?” You shake your head a little more enthusiastically than you intended.

Hyunjae swiftly walks to the seat in front of you, and your eyes never leave him. You were curious, intrigued, and everything the like with the man that stood in front of you, not even batting an eye on your side.

Not until Eunbin smacks your arm with a book, mouthing to stop looking at him.

You probably have terrified the man already.

But your eyes never stop glancing at him.

Smiling to yourself after mentally agreeing that you talk to him later, you got your things and prepared for the class.

You were never a rushing type of student. Yet your leg kept on bouncing with the excitement of hearing the bell ring signaling break period.

You instantly stood up with the rest of the students the second the bell rang, itching to get to talk to Hyunjae.

Hyungseo beat you to it.

“Spare the man some time before you blare some stupid questions to get to know him better,” Eunbin tugs you away, while you pout in disappointment.

“Hyunjae. You’re.. Hyunjae,” Were the last things you heard from Hyungseo before you let yourself get dragged by Eunbin. Your eyes still laid on him, your head tilting as if you weren’t shamingly staring at the newcomer.

“y/n!” Youngjae comes running to you, grabbing your arms. “Do you happen to know someone named Hyunjae?!” He shook your shoulders, tears of joy– you assume, brimming his eyes.

“Uh, yeah, Youngjae. He’s still in the cl–”

“Thank you y/n! I’ll see you later!” Youngjae runs to your room and you even hear him squeal in happiness from afar.

Meanwhile, Hyunjae stared in confusion at Hyungseo who approached him, a raise in his eyebrow as he kept his mouth shut.

“I’m.. I uh,” Hyungseo stutters, looking down in an attempt to hide his teary eyes.

“Hyunjae!” Youngjae exclaims as he stomps his way inside the room, giving Hyunjae the tightest hug he could ever give. Hyunjae stands there in surprise, letting Youngjae continue squealing because as weird as it was, the two men that confronted him felt way too familiar to be ignored.

“Youngjae– I don’t think he remembers us,” Hyungseo mutters, pulling Youngjae back and away from Hyunjae, whose ears perk at the mention of the name.

Youngjae looks expectedly at Hyunjae, waiting for him to confirm Hyungseo’s speculations.

“It’s okay.” Youngjae smiles, “We look kind of different so we understand.” Patting Hyungseo in the arm, encouraging him to speak up.

“I’m.. Hyungseo.. And this is Youngjae,” He mumbles, a light fidget in his fingers. “..from the daycare,”

Hyunjae feels his heart drown in guiltiness and at the same time happiness, as he’s found– finally found the one he treated his family at heart.

Hyunjae bites his lip to stop the tears, looking down at his fiddling fingers. He can’t utter a word out, too happy at the news.

The three men looked at each other with tears in their eyes and a smile on their faces, and later Hyunjae was pulled to share a brotherly hug with Hyungseo and Youngjae.

He has never felt this happy after the incident.

You smile at the scene in front of you, though you weren’t too sure what was happening. You were peeking at the corner of the window looking at them after escaping Eunbin who continuously tugged you away from Hyunjae.

You knew a bit of Hyungseo and Youngjae’s life– them being one of your closest friends you easily made. And you were more than positive that Hyunjae is one of the people they cherished from the daycare they immaculately adored since they were kids, only when the incident occurred that it had to be brought down and the kids from the daycare never saw each other again.

Hyungseo and Youngjae just so happened to be neighbors after moving into the neighborhood, attending the same school, and making a goal together to find the rest of the kids they treated as family.

“y/n!” A fuming Eunbin walks to you, tugging you away from your classroom once again and you crane your neck to keep on looking, just in time as you see Hyunjae burst into the sweetest smile you have ever seen. “You’re unbelievable. You see the man for less than a minute and you’ve already fallen,” Eunbin mutters, looking at you helplessly, making your neck longer to stare at Hyunjae’s smile even just a second longer.

──────────── ·  ·  ·  · ✦

“Hyungseo!” You jump to put him in a light headlock, ruffling his hair.

“Come on, y/n.. I styled this today,” He whines, trying to protect his already messy hair.

“You never style your hair,” You chuckle, letting go of him and helping him arrange his hair back to normal.

“Well get used to it because I’m styling it every day now,” Hyungseo proudly smiles at you, a light hop in his steps.

“So.. How many kids do you need to find now?” You start, curiosity evident in your voice as you follow him to your room.

“So! We’ve found Hyunjae, Sunwoo, Younghoon, and Chanhee.. Four more kids! Four more and– Wait,” Hyungseo stops and you do too, raising your eyebrows at him.

“What?”

“How’d you know about it?”

“About what?”

“Why’d you ask how many kids we have to find.. Now?” He mocked, and you only gave him a chuckle.

“I assumed. You rarely start a conversation with a newcomer. But this time, you even beat me to it. I uh.. Also kinda.. Eavesdropped. No! I mean– I didn’t hear anything but–”

“You like him?” Hyungseo wriggles his eyebrows, giving you a smirk.

“Well– I do– but that doesn’t mean that’s the reason I eavesdropped. I just– promise, looked from afar. Youngjae looked kinda pumped up when he asked me about Hyunjae so I was curious.” You rambled, a pout on your face.

Hyungseo just laughs at you, putting an arm around your shoulder as he dragged you to the room.

“It’s okay. I was going to tell you anyway,” He winks, and he enters the room alone. Your eyes immediately drop to Hyunjae, with whom you shared a second of eye contact before he looked away.

“Hi,” You start, poking his shoulder the moment you take your seat, ignoring Eunbin jokingly giving you a disgusted face and Hyungseo’s smirk as he starts preparing for class.

Leaning closer to Hyunjae, your desk tipped as you expect Hyunjae to give at least a hello back.

But he doesn’t. He only glances at you from the side and pushes your desk back properly with his discreet hand.

You let out a confused sound, your eyes widening. You hear Eunbin snort and you turn to look at Hyungseo who confusingly sat beside Hyunjae, eyeing him.

“Try again next time, honey,” Eunbin caresses your arm with a teasing smile on her face, giving you an encouraging nod before Mr. Kim steps inside the room.

Your eyes only linger at Hyunjae and your mind just keeps thinking of all the things you might’ve possibly done in the past two days you met Hyunjae the whole day.

──────────── ·  ·  ·  · ✦

And the fact that you concluded you didn’t do anything just made you want to get to know him more, pester him more.

“Hi!” You jump in front of Hyunjae, walking backward. You just smiled at him, your hands at your back as you, once again, shamelessly stared at him with curiosity in your eyes.

Hyunjae just looks at you for a second, then forward. You were much shorter than him, so it was easy to ignore you in front of him with your height as he strides forward, his destination in sight.

You pout, slouching as you throw a fit in front of him.

“Hyunjae, Hyunjae, Hyunjae.. Hyunjae!” You continue, stomping like a kid who didn’t get what they wanted in the toy store. Hyunjae just sighs and tucks his hands in his uniform pants, continuing to walk forward. When you stop to try and block him, he swiftly escapes you so you just run back in front of him. “Did I do something? We haven’t even talked and you’re so cold!”

Your words didn't faze Hyunjae. He continued to walk like there was no one in front of him getting his attention.

Everybody looked in pity as you– the social butterfly of the whole school, failed to get the attention of the ice-cold newcomer.

"Look, Lee Hyunjae. I just want to be friends. What the hell did I do?" You continue to whine, tailing him to your seats. "Is it the fact that I like you or what?"

Those words. Those were the only words that had finally made Hyunjae look at you even if it was a scowl. Nevertheless, it made you happy.

"Oh.. So I just have to say I like you tons of times to keep you on your toes and for you to at least glance at me," You slyly nod, giving him a squint as he just shakes his head.

You finally head back to your seat, a satisfied smile plastered permanently on your face as you stick your tongue out to Eunbin.

Hyunjae's cold actions are noticed by his two closest friends, though. He's been the talk of the students the moment he had stepped in the gates without a smile on his face.

"I can't believe even y/n can't get through you after a week," Youngjae says, munching in his burger as his eyes land on you with a pout that stared at Hyunjae's back with a pout. "She never failed at getting friends." The thought made him chuckle, though.

"True. You're nothing like the kid from the daycare," Hyungseo stops chewing the moment he realizes the weight of his words, uttering numerous apologies to Hyunjae that acted nonchalantly, but the two knew better.

Hyunjae just quietly swallows his food, giving Hyungseo a small smile.

"It's fine," Hyunjae says, then heaving a deep sigh from his nose.

The other two share a look, and they just decide to let the topic go.

"But why don't you talk to y/n though? They don't bite," Youngjae stumbles to the original topic back, chuckling at your state.

Hyunjae surprisingly gives a light, short chuckle, looking at the two men in front of him.

"I don't need anybody else but the both of you, and the rest of the kids from the daycare."

──────────── ·  ·  ·  · ✦

“Hyunjae.” You poke his shoulder with a pen, tipping your desk once again to bring yourself closer to him despite him ignoring you. “Hey,” You kept on pestering him, and Hyunjae only glanced to see if it was important or not. A smile tugs on your lips when he does, giving him a neatly folded paper with your writing on it.

Hyunjae sighs and gets it from you out of curiosity, letting you watch from the side with a smile and an expecting look.

I like you!

Those three words are simply written on the paper, but blaring at Hyunjae. His stoic face remained untouched, crumpling the paper and throwing it in his bag.

You whine, muttering “Cold,” as you feel his hand push the metals of your desk back to their place again as he usually does when you habitually tipped on your desk.

And you continue it for a few more days.

Those little notes you gave to him just end up getting thrown into his bag, unscathed.

“At least he doesn’t crumple it,” You chuckle at Eunbin as if you have just made a point.

“You’re.. Kidding me. Right?” Eunbin scoffs in disbelief, “I can’t believe you’re that persistent, what the fuck?” She shakes her head, her eyes watching you take your usual seat behind Hyunjae whose nose is stuck on the calculus book.

“Hi Hyunjae,” You greet him, used to being ignored as you hop back to your seat.

“Hyungseo,” As if it was the first time hearing him, your head shoots up from your phone to Hyunjae, your eyes wide and mouth gape– like Eunbin.

You, or simply the whole class except Hyungseo, haven't heard Hyunjae much after he introduced himself a month ago.

You watch them exchange a conversation quietly, Hyunjae asking how this math equation was– you didn’t get what the question was.

“Oh, y/n’s good at calc,” Hyungseo looks at you frozen in your place, blinking at him.

“I– what? Calculus? Hell yeah! I can he–,”

“No thanks. I’ll get this soon,” Hyunjae dismisses you, making you shut your mouth in an instant and your lips formed into a pout, looking at Hyungseo who only gave you an apologetic smile.

And you question yourself once again if you ever did something to Hyunjae.

Feeling discouraged and a little offended by the sudden outburst, you sink on your seat as the day passes.

──────────── ·  ·  ·  · ✦

Maybe you were just annoying. At least, to him. But what can you do? You liked the man, and you weren’t even giving him advances. You just wanted to be friends, at least, for now.

Overthinking your personality, you find yourself a little bit timid than you had never been, only accepting the continuous greeting from people you were familiar with.

Even Eunbin realizes the small change of yours.

“The fuck’s wrong with you?” Eunbin nudges your side, and you only give a shake of the head. “Don’t tell me Hyunjae’s getting to you.”

“I don’t know, Eunbin, maybe he is.” You shrug your shoulders, pulling her to start walking to your room.

You sigh, feeling small only at the sight of Hyunjae quietly reading his calculus book again.

Hyunjae notices the past few days that you weren’t giving him your usual, cheery Hi Hyunjae, or the simple notes that had the same writings of I like you.

Or so he knew.

Sneaking his hand to his bag, he reached for any paper that he reached first and made sure you weren’t looking at him, nor Eunbin.

He sighs as he sees what was written inside, feeling a little sorry.

The Legend of the Banana. He feels his head pound, you may have given up on him. He sneaks another paper, opening it.

The Legend of the Pineapple. Yeah– you’ve given up on your paper confessions.

Hyunjae was positive you wrote just basically anything in the papers you gave to him, knowing he’d only throw it on his bag without opening it.

He looks at the window beside him, catching a glimpse of your reflection that only had your head down on the desk, facing the windows beside you too.

And he guesses, maybe you didn’t deserve anything he’s given to you. That is, getting ignored.

“Hyunjae!” Hyungseo wakes him up from the small zone out he had gotten, grimacing. He takes another glance at your reflection, confused as to why Hyungseo had to shout at him as you looked at his back. “I’ve been calling you for minutes already, you good?” Hyungseo shifts on his seat, garnering most of their classmate’s, including yours, attention.

“Yeah, yeah. Of course. I’m good,” Hyunjae steals a glance at you, and you were already shifting back to your position a while ago, uninterested in their conversation you would often poke your nose at. “What’s up?” Hyunjae hides the disappointment in his voice, trying to focus on Hyungseo.

“Okay, weird. But here– there’s this party that’s hosted for our block and.. Do you want to go?”

“Who’s going?” Hyunjae almost instantly asks back, expecting you to start jumping on your seat to get into the conversation. He bites his lower lip in anticipation, unconsciously gritting his teeth as he waits for you.

None came.

Hyungseo raises his brow at the man in front of him– all worked up.

“What’s up with you?” Maybe Hyungseo senses it, but he doesn’t want to read between things too much that can make Hyunjae uncomfortable so he zips his lips.

“I.. okay. Sorry. When is it?” Hyunjae disappointingly mutters, looking down and facing forward to sit properly.

“Wait, you’re going?” Hyungseo springs to his seat, excited at the thought of Hyunjae, for the first time after they’ve reconciled, is finally going out with them.

“Yeah sure. I mean, it’s just a normal party, right? Not some sort of frat or any wild things,” He confirms, having only agreed because he felt bad for Hyungseo and Youngjae who tried their best to get close to him again.

And maybe because he was too sure you were going, too.

He was right.

Not so timidly entering the dim house with Youngjae on his side, who did not hesitate to greet everyone that passed by him.

You were there, on the other side of the house, with a non-alcoholic drink in your hand as you swiftly talked to one of your seniors.

“Someone’s been looking at you the moment they stepped in my house,” Wooyoung narrows his eyes on you, then pouting to the main doors.

You scoff at him, but your eyes still look for the one he was describing. Hyunjae, who Wooyoung was describing, was long dragged by Youngjae away from sight to play some ping pong games Hyunjae didn’t know how, so your eyes landed on a schoolmate you’ve only shared frequent smiles with– Hyunjin.

“Ah,” You can’t hide the disappointment in your voice when you instinctively mutter that, Wooyoung cackling at you.

“Why, were you expecting someone else?”

“Hyunjae,” You sulk, turning back to Wooyoung after smiling at Hyunjin.

“Too bad I can’t remember names,” Wooyoung shrugs, patting your arm. “Now if I may, I’ll leave you to have your fun while I keep on welcoming new guests.” Wooyoung smiles at you, ruffling your hair that you’ve prepared for almost half an hour after hearing– eavesdropping, that Hyunjae was going to the party.

Eunbin finally arrives not long after, and you engage in more conversations with the people around you, not a second did you see Hyunjae until Wooyoung called for a game that parties can’t miss on, question or dare.

“Do you want to join?” Eunbin asks you first, and you shrug so you let Eunbin drag you to the forming circle.

“Come on, man. You haven’t played a single game the whole night. Are you planning to just stand around? Let’s play!” You hear Youngjae faintly whining in the background, and you could feel your heartbeat faster at just the sound of someone sighing, letting the younger drag him on the circle, in front yet far from you.

Your eyes linger on him as if it still was the first time seeing him. You were lovestruck. Anyone could see that.

Except him.

Hyunjae’s eyes unconsciously wander around for someone until they land on yours. Habitually, you would’ve smiled at him or even winked, but before you break eye contact, Hyunjae does it.

You pout, slouching on your place and brushing your hair back.

The game wasn’t fun. For you, at least. Everyone was having the time of their lives hearing teas and secrets from people they don’t even fully know, chugging on their choice of drinks.

You only realize Hyunjin was playing too when the bottle points on him.

“Since we’re starting over, Hyunjin will give the question or dare to the next person picked by the bottle!” Wooyoung cheerfully shouts, pointing at Hyunjin. He nods, standing on his seat to turn the bottle himself.

It points at you. You don’t know how, but you were almost positive he manipulated it. You have always felt uncomfortable around him, but can’t quite point your finger on why you did, hence only smiles he got from you, never a conversation.

“Oh,” Hyunjin smiles, going back to his seat. “y/n. Question or dare?” Maybe it was just you who judged him too much. You didn’t want any bad blood so you acted as you are, carefree and confident.

“Uhm,” You were hesitating on what to choose, biting on the insides of your cheeks. “I guess I need to choose a question. I don’t know you well enough to trust you on a dare,” It wasn’t a question, really, but the laughs you got from everyone including Hyunjin made it something laughable.

Hyunjae just stared at you, though. You’re like an open book, at least to him. He easily read you, your facial expressions, the small movement your fingers did when you were uncomfortable or anxious– he knew it all in just a short period. He guesses that it was because he saw his younger self in you, but he just knew.

“Do you find anyone attractive in the circle?” Hyunjin’s eyes wander in the circle, propping his wrists back to assist his back in leaning back. He confidently smirks, your eyes landing on Hyunjae momentarily came unnoticed by him.

“Of course, there is,” You smile at Hyunjin, and he thinks it’s himself you were describing. Before he could ask another question he wanted, you already walked to the middle and spun the bottle.

Unfortunately, it didn’t land on Hyunjae. You couldn’t care less, though. You were slowly having your fun in the game after having participated. Not until it lands on you again and Hyunjin volunteers to be your frontman.

“Question or Dare, y/n?” Hyunjin smacks his lips together, waiting for your answer and when you say dare, he chuckles evilly and pops his fingers bones, acting as if he was to give you the hardest dare he can give. “I dare you to date me,”

Despite the harsh cheers you got from the people around, you stayed quiet and stared at Hyunjin, trying to find any other way to escape the situation.

Your fingers continued to pick on the hem of your shirt, swallowing the lump on your throat while Hyunjin waited for you to do something.

“Well, where’s the y/n I know?” Wooyoung continues to encourage you, hollering.

“I uh,” You look around, to Eunbin, to the floor, to your pants, then to the hand that suddenly reached out to you.

“Let’s go,” Hyunjae says, deadpanning as he looks down at you, waving his hand.

The crowd goes quiet, as quiet as to how they perceive Hyunjae to be.

Even you were shocked. Even Youngjae. Even Eunbin. Even Hyungseo. Everyone was, and they were just waiting for you to say something.

“Uh– me?” You ask confusingly, looking at his eyes and back to his hand.

“Do I look like I’m talking to anybody else? Or do you want to stay?” Hyunjae desperately prayed that he didn’t read you wrong or he’d just want the land to eat him from embarrassment. It took a bit of beating himself up mentally if he’ll help you since a while ago or not. So if you were to reject the offer, he’s better off not showing his face in the school the next week.

Ignoring the harsh thumping of your heart, you take his hand and almost jump at how cold it was. Muttering numerous apologies as Hyunjae tugged on your hand til outside, he continued to walk.

“Are.. you going to kill me?” You cautiously ask, slightly dragging your feet to slow his pace.

Hyunjae just realizes his hand is still held to yours, ignoring the temporary warmth your hand gave him.

“I just saved you. Aren’t you going to thank me?” Hyunjae scoffs in disbelief, a sense of coldness still heard through his voice.

“Thank you, I guess,” You mumbled, and it was something in a blue moon that everything was awkward when you were talking to someone. It was the first time you were finally talking to Hyunjae normally after a few months. Of course, everything was awkward– even for him.

“Do you want to take a walk?” Hyunjae courageously makes the first move, his face softening. He feels himself let go of the breath he was holding when you nod, hopping to his side and getting back to your cheerful self.

“Why did you decide to help me? Do you finally like me back?” Hyunjae couldn’t be more grateful when he hears the same words spill out of your mouth, and he doesn’t know why but the smile on your face finally makes him break out of his stoic facade, a small smile leaving his lips. “What the fuck.. Are you for real?” You cautiously poke his arm and gasp when it doesn’t go through, stepping aside.

The little gesture Hyunjae does that goes unnoticed by you is when he tugs you back, away from the middle of the street when he swaps places with you– like the little gesture he does when you tip your desk to him, his hands habitually assisting the desk’s metal from the side to lean it back to its place.

It’s little, so you don’t notice it.

You should’ve.

Instead, you focused on acting shocked at Hyunjae’s sudden change of personality toward you.

“I swear to god, Hyunjae, if you’re planning on murdering me.. Can I make a run for it now?” Your hands exaggeratedly fly to your mouth, covering it.

“Stop being overdramatic, y/n.. I just.. Think of this as an apology, yeah?” Hyunjae stops and you do too, raising a brow at him.

“Apology for what? For not liking me back?” You scoff, waving your hands in his face.

“No. For always pushing you away,” Hyunjae sighs, and he finally gets it off his chest. He felt guiltier day by day when he noticed the way you acted slightly different around everyone, the weight of his own words digging into his consciousness. “And for being a douche,”

You softly smiled at him, shaking your head.

“It’s nothing. But it’s good to know that you know you’re a douche,” You snicker jokingly, making Hyunjae scoff in disbelief. You walk ahead, leaving him alone a few steps back.

It flowed as natural as a river does on a normal day– your conversation, the blooming friendship you had with each other.

And you know for sure it was going to last for a long time.

You knew because Hyunjae was more than comfortable now– even Hyungseo and Youngjae had confirmed that. Maybe it was your aura or the fact that Hyunjae had found a new friend that he can confide in so comfortably, a friend that had no filter in their words, it was all your magic.

“You know, my confession still stands, right?” You continue to dote on Hyunjae, who did nothing but chuckle on your smooth yet rusty lines of confessing your love to him.

That didn’t mean it didn’t make Hyunjae’s heart flutter, though.

After a few more months, you were now both having your friendly date in a simple fast-food restaurant, waiting for him to finish eating. He just gives you a hum, munching on his food.

You give a light laugh as your eyes dart on the big windows, water slowly splattering one by one on it.

“It’s raining!” You sounded enthusiastic for someone who didn’t have an umbrella so Hyunjae looked up at you, then outside to where it was dimming and getting darker because of the clouds that started covering the moon that brightly shined.

“I don’t have an umbrella, though,” He reasons, looking at you again but you had this big smile on your face, enjoying how the rain, one seemingly wouldn’t stop in a heartbeat, met the ground. “You like the rain?” Hyunjae asks, raising his eyebrows.

“Yeah. They feel calming. Unless there are thunderstorms, though. But I like the ambiance the rain gives,” You cheekily scrunch your nose at him, telling him to continue eating. “You’re such a messy eater, you know that?” Your face distorted to a disgusted one, eyeing him.

Getting a piece of tissue and swiftly wiping Hyunjae’s lip was a touch move, it all happened quickly so you miss the faint blush on Hyunjae’s cheeks, too busy with your heart wanting to get out of your ribcage.

“Are you done? Can we go?” You whined like a little kid, pouting at Hyunjae.

“Go where, y/n? It’s pouring,” Hyunjae shakes his head at your tantrum, wiping his lips.

“Let’s just walk around under roofs. I promise I’ll behave!” Yeah, you were acting like a kid that wants everything to go your way.

Hyunjae lets you, though.

Grabbing his things, he realizes your outfits almost matched each other. He wore a simple white shirt inside his black hoodie and track pants, while you wore a black sweater over your shirt too, in your jeans. He chuckles at the realization, seeing that you were already outside and reaching your hand out for the rain.

“Hey,” Hyunjae pulls your hand back, shaking the water off. “It’s either you keep your hands under the roofs or we stay inside the restaurant.” He hisses playfully, and you pressed your lips to a thin line and continued to walk beside him.

Just like that– he was the one almost getting rained on as he swapped your places, and you hesitate whether to comment on it. You decide not to, touched enough by the little gesture.

“There’s a shed there. We can wait there while we wait for the rain to stop,” You point out at the shed in front of a small basketball court, smiling to yourself.

Escaping Hyunjae’s side, you run to the shed while your small hands protect your head for a second from the rain.

Before Hyunjae even scolds you, he stops himself and sighs it away knowing it was no use so he does the same, running beside you.

You shake the water off your body, while Hyunjae elegantly wipes his. Taking the seat first, you sighed in relief after feeling your legs wobble from all the walking when you’ve only really walked for a solid five minutes.

“Tired?” Hyunjae asks, and you only hum in agreement. You watch how the rain falls on the court, splattering around effortlessly. You catch a glimpse of a ball on the sidelines, smiling.

It was a comfortable silence, the rain being the ambiance you loved. Hyunjae, despite being a few inches away from you, felt warm. He only looked forward, seeming to have a lot on his mind.

“You can tell me anything, Hyunjae. I’m not one to rat out,” You mumble, and Hyunjae looks at you fondly. You look back at him, smiling encouragingly. “You don’t have to, either. If you don’t want to,”

It takes a few more minutes of silence until Hyunjae leans back on the wall like you, sighing as he looks away from the rain, and to his phone, he was holding tightly.

“You know this.. Daycare thing with Hyungseo and Youngjae, right?” Hyunjae hesitates, his fingers starting to fiddle with one another as flashbacks start flooding his mind.

“Yeah.. Hyungseo and Youngjae talk about it as if it was an immaculate place endlessly,” You chuckle, recollecting the times Hyungseo often looked excited when talking about the daycare and the friends he made, especially the people who took care of them.. Dearly. And Youngjae, when he just suddenly bursts into your room to talk about how he missed everyone in there. “Go ahead, I’ll just be listening.”

Hyunjae almost broke down at those words. Those were the only words he has been wanting to hear for years, and you were the first one to offer your ear.

And maybe even a shoulder to cry on.

“They were my family. Sangyeon, Joonyoung, Younghoon, Chanhee, Juyeon, Hyungseo, Haknyeon, Hyunjoon, Sunwoo, and Youngjae. And.. the people who took utmost care of us,” You break your stare in the rain, to look at Hyunjae. He had always had this big burden on his shoulders that you always succeeded to see, and everyone turned a blind eye to it. “You see– my parents.. I never felt like their child. One might say that they never really loved me but.. I don’t know. When I turned eighteen, I started to live independently because I thought.. I thought that I’d be fine that way more than staying with them. But there’s this.. y/n.. There’s this really heavy feeling I always kept in my heart and,” Hyunjae sniffs, swallowing the lump on his throat.

It was the first time he was ever telling anyone about the incident, one that scarred him throughout his childhood and the first time he ever felt like bursting or crying.

Your hands meet his, caressing it in the softest way possible to let him know that you were there, listening, there for him.

“I feel like it was all my fault when the incident happened. Day by day as I grew older, I felt my consciousness eating me up,” He finally breaks down, clutching his chest as he lets his tears fall.

The way you see it, you would never understand how Hyunjae feels. You could only sympathize with him, let him and his tears fall because that is what he needed after keeping it for so long.

Feeling your heart break at the sight of Hyunjae breaking, tears also brimmed your eyes. He continued to sob, loud against the continuous droplets of the rain around the both of you.

“Whatever people say,” he says between sobs, his hand that holds his phone tightened. “It doesn’t matter. It’s still there, and I don’t.. I don’t think anyone can change my mind but.. But him.” Hyunjae opens his phone, a contact number you don’t know whose blaring on the screen.

Teacher Changmin.” The name felt so foreign slipping out of his lips for Hyunjae. It has been years he’s ever said his name, or even if he was to still call the now successful man a teacher.

The name was quite familiar to you, and you vividly remember Hyunjae saying one of his hobbies was dancing, but never showed you so you assumed he was bad at it. You were not one fond of dancing but had a lot of interest when watching it, so putting end to ends together, you bit your lip if it was okay to ask him. There were also days the name slipped out of your two friends’ lips, later sealing it back to avoid any more questions that they don’t want to answer.

“Ji Changmin.. Right?” You breathe out, looking at the number. Hyunjae just laughs, even he can’t believe that the person he used to call teacher is now someone who just doesn’t care for eleven kids, but for who knows how many kids as he’s now a world-renowned choreographer.

“I want to talk to him. Badly, y/n. I want to talk to him so much,” Hyunjae’s voice break along with your heart hearing him, making you pull him to your warmth as you quietly hushed him and swayed him continuously like you cradled a baby to sleep.

You feel his hand clutch at your sweater, as he finally sobbed everything he had been keeping for years. All it took was the words you can tell me, and I’m here for you from someone he knows won’t judge him, and wouldn’t blame him for the reasons of one of the closest in his heart’s death.

The loud splattering of the rain against the roofs drowned Hyunjae’s sobs, and just like you, the rain had become something so calming for him.

When he had finally calmed down and the fistful of sweater he had been clutching on had loosened, you broke the hug and looked him dead in the eyes.

“Hyunjae. You don’t need to feel pressured to do anything– I want you to talk to him because you’re ready, not when just because all the people around you make you feel pressured to do so, okay?” You wipe his tears away, ducking to see his face better that only looked down. When his eyes meet yours, “I’ll be there, then.”

Your hands reach for his arms to pull him up, smiling slyly which made Hyunjae chuckle.

“What are you up to, now?” Hyunjae entirely lets himself get dragged until he realizes you were dragging him outside the shed. “y/n! What the fuck you’re going to get sick!” He tries to pull you back but you were already out in the rain, your usual cheery smile plastered on your face that made Hyunjae give in.

“In here– no one will hear you. Against the loud rain, no one ever would! Nor your tears– no one would see them cause they drown in the rain. You would see the look of judgment on the people’s faces but who cares?! If it makes you happy, free.. I want you to be that, at least in front of me.” You shout to him, your eyes squinting as you feel the rain drenching all your clothes and even your socks.

Hyunjae smiles at you– one that he had never given you nor anyone after Changmin left. It was weird, you were weird. How the hell did Hyunjae get to just asking you to come to eat with him outside to a small park court, getting drenched in the rain.. And him screaming all his lungs out?

You just looked at him with a loving look, relieved that Hyunjae is finally letting himself.. Free.

After Hyunjae had said all his frustrations on Changmin and the cruel world, you only realize that Hyunjae was still holding your hand tightly, and he suddenly engulfs you in a hug under the rain.

“Thank you,” Hyunjae simply mutters, and you feel him tighten the hug as he looks up, letting his face get massaged by the rain. His hand lingers at the back of your head, caressing it. He leaves a feathery kiss by the crown of your head, thinking you were too preoccupied with the rain to feel it. You weren’t. You were preoccupied with him, so you did.

That was the time you knew you didn’t just like him. You fucking loved the man in front of you. And you found yourself in the most confusing place you can be– because you knew there was a connection between you and Hyunjae. You aren’t lovers.. But you aren’t just friends, either.

──────────── ·  ·  ·  · ✦

Everything became special after that day. Hyunjae had become more lively, still stoic but more open to talking to others he hadn't had the chance to talk to. It made you wonder, though– how he changed drastically in just a couple of months.

You’d want to take credit for that, but you don’t speak about it.

“y/n,” Eunbin shakes your arm, making you look at her. “You’re smiling again,” She rolled her eyes, and you could only chuckle.

You hear Hyunjae, Hyungseo, and Youngjae’s voices from outside of your room, and your eyes habitually land on the door to wait for them.

Hyunjae had this big smile plastered on his face, one you still can’t grow used to when he’s in his uniform. Hyungseo has his head locked in Hyunjae’s arms, begging to be released while Youngjae cheered for Hyunjae, tailing in the back. Before Youngjae parted ways with them, your eyes met, and you both smiled at each other in acknowledgment.

Hyunjae strides back to his seat, giving you a small smile and taking his seat.

“y/n, Eunbin,” Hyungseo calls you and your friend, making you perk on your seat.

“Yeah?”

“Are you free later? There’s this really good ice cream par–,”

“y/n’s walking me home later,” Hyunjae cuts Hyungseo short, making Hyungseo, Eunbin, and even you crane your necks.

“I am?” You confirm, furrowing your brows to try and trying to recall any memory you might have forgotten.

“You are,” Hyunjae shrugs, shifting on his seat to look in front. You mindlessly nod, muttering a small sorry to Hyungseo.

“Sorry, I needed to talk to you,” Hyunjae says after you wait for him to gather his things, most of your classmates have already gone out to head home.

“And you couldn’t have done that a while ago?” You chuckle but wait for him anyway. “What are we going to talk about? Are you finally going to acknowledge my continuous love letters for you?”

“I just.. Wanted to talk. Is that bad?” Hyunjae hisses at you playfully, squinting his eyes. You just laugh it away, Him ignoring your flirty remarks come unnoticed.

The dark clouds have started to conquer the bright sky, the sun setting.

“Okay– but should it be the other way? Shouldn’t you be walking me home?” You pressed on, but you were still heading to his. You don’t mind having to walk only a few blocks away from your home. Eunbin and Hyunjae lived only a few blocks away from you, but Eunbin always had meetings for her organizations so you rarely walked home with her.

“My house’s closer than yours,” Hyunjae lamely excuses, tugging you once again on the other side to protectively walk on the side of the highway.

“Hey, graduation’s close. You never told me what you want to take on in college,” You gasp, even after a year of being friends with him, you don’t even know where he’ll be after graduating high school.

“Not sure, but the first thing that comes to mind is probably business or.. Criminal justice. I’ve always wanted to be a banker or.. a.. Uh,” Hyunjae stumbles in his words, too embarrassed to say what his childhood dream was.

“What? You want to become a murderer or what?” Joking, you smack his arm lightly.

“A secret agent or something,” He whispers, but you got it and you stop yourself from bursting into laughter.

“That’s.. A nice dream,” You bite your lip, inhaling a good amount of air to calm your insides.

Hyunjae sighs as he snakes an arm around your shoulders, and your expressions froze as it was.

“What the fuck are you doing?” You mumble, trying to pry away from his hold but he just tightens it, “Are you going for a chokehold or something?”

“Someone’s following us.” Hyunjae kept his eyes forward and wasn’t looking nervous. If anything, he just looked tired.

You whip your head back only for your cheek to be pushed by Hyunjae’s fingers.

“Are you serious or?” You mumble but take his advice anyway. You start to get nervous little by little, feeling more cautious by your surroundings as you hear, you assumed, the person who was following you getting nearer.

Hyunjae feels your shoulders tense, and finally, he bursts out in rage. Groaning, he stops in his tracks when his house is already in sight, and for a second you thought he was going to confront the stalker.

He does.

“Stay here,” He says under his breath, gritting his teeth as he pats your shoulders softly. You try stopping him, grabbing his wrists tightly but he effortlessly snaps it off, too ticked off by the person who was now obviously hiding on a thick post, acting as if he was on his phone.

Hyunjae takes the cap off the man, revealing someone very familiar to him and makes his heart shatter at the obvious lines in his face– Ji Changmin.

“Either just talk to me or stop following me every fucking time,” Hyunjae challenges, begs. You stay on your spot, too shocked at what was happening in front of you.

Changmin’s eyes widen softly, as he’s finally gotten a better and closer look at the kid he had always kept an eye on, even after his disappearance.

“Hyunjae..” Changmin mumbles then looks down at his feet. He feels too ashamed to face the now grown-up, the one he so adored but still left alone in the cruel world.

The next thing you know, you were dragged inside Hyunjae’s house, awkwardly sitting between the solo-seat sofa where Changmin was and Hyunjae who was beside you.

“I.. uhm, should get going.” You mumble, gathering your things. Changmin just stares fondly at you, a small smile on his face. His eyes later landed on Hyunjae’s hands that stopped your wrists.

“I need you..” Hyunjae whispers, his eyes begging you to stay. “Don’t go, please..” He urges, and you just plop back on the seat with a sigh.

Your eyes start going back and forth from Changmin to Hyunjae, waiting for someone to start talking.

You glance at Hyunjae’s hands, and he was severely fiddling with it. Sighing, you take a hold of his hand to stop it, intertwining it with yours.

“If you’re not ready, it’s okay. He’s here, and you have his number. But if you are ready– like I told you, I’ll be here,” You caress his knuckles with your thumb, and he looks at you hopefully.

“I’m ready,” Hyunjae smiles at you, tightening his hold on yours. Giving him another encouraging smile, you nod.

Changmin watches the short exchange with sweet eyes, a smile continuously growing on his lips. He recollects the time he spent with his significant other when Hyunjae was still small.

But now, Hyunjae has grown up right in front of his eyes, looking at someone like how Changmin did with his significant other.

“It’s okay, y/n. You should stay,” Changmin takes the initiative, smiling at you.

“You even got a background on my friends?” Hyunjae scoffs, and you stay quiet. “Teache– I mean, Changmin. You’ve been tailing me after you left. You’ve been keeping people on my tabs– why.. Just why can’t you talk to me personally?” Hyunjae’s voice comes off as cold, rude. But you and Changmin knew better than to let it get the best of you, opting to let Hyunjae say whatever he wants to say in any manner to the man.

“Because if you weren’t ready, Hyunjae, I am not too.” Changmin shortly replies, and you could feel Hyunjae’s nails pick on your skin. You don’t tell him about it though, understanding how frustrating the situation was.

“So you want the kid who you left alone, talk to you first? Is that it?” Hyunjae feels tears brimming his eyes, but he doesn’t let them fall.

“No, Hyunjae. I.. I just don’t want to hurt you more than you’re hurting now. If you still haven’t moved on from.. Their death.. Then I can still imagine how much I can still hurt you by showing my face after leaving you.” Changmin had all the answers prepared for Hyunjae’s questions because had always been ready. He just doesn’t want Hyunjae to feel bad for having to deal with his feelings.

He knows he hurt Hyunjae a great deal when he left. Hyunjae had always been one of the reasons for his stay at that time, pursuing his dreams a little bit later. It just so happened that his significant other meant much more than love to him. So when they died.. A part of him died too, but his dreams.

His dreams were the only thing that kept him away from the void. But he knows better than to leave his significant other’s life– the daycare and the kids they adored and loved so much, alone and to grow up like the daycare never happened in their lives.

He made sure that every kid his significant other cared for, grew up like how they both had hoped for, and enough to live and survive in the tough, cruel world.

Like how Hyunjae had grown up.

Hyunjae stays quiet, and all of a sudden, looking at the man he once looked up to– and still is, makes everything fade away. His anger, disappointment, confusion, and everything the like, disappeared when he looked into Changmin’s eyes.

Because it beamed nothing but sorrow and honesty. He knew that if he wasn’t to forgive Changmin yet this instant, he knew he’d just be playing games with himself.

Hyunjae simply stared. There were no more words that slipped out of his mouth, vividly remembering the last time he saw Changmin’s significant other. The one he treated as a family along with Changmin. Hyunjae’s time with them and Changmin.

Because after the daycare closed, his mind only revolved on reconnecting what was once a home for him, along with the people in it.

He holds back a sob, not wanting to break, at least yet, in front of Changmin. But the moment your other hand caresses your intertwined hands, he lets everything dawn into him.

He finally lets his tears flow, looking exhaustedly at Changmin who was already crying since a while back.

“I missed you,” Hyunjae mumbles. Seeing them so broken, even Changmin who you just knew from your friends’ stories, made your heart ache. “I missed you so much,” Hyunjae sobs, letting go of your hand to jump on Changmin’s arms.

You proudly smile, wiping the lone tear that escapes your eyes as you watch them share a brotherly– or fatherly hug.

You knew Hyunjae’s life would change then.

He became someone so fresh in other people’s eyes– someone who changed for the better, someone who’s finally worth approaching. But not for you, because Hyunjae has always been like that.

Your persistence was something you should be proud of because it was something that brought you closer to Hyunjae.

And maybe your feelings too.

What you felt for Hyunjae the first time you met, or rather, looked at Hyunjae, everything was still the same. If not, then harder. You deserve a round of applause for trying to be okay with what you have with Hyunjae now, not giving your feelings a second thought to Hyunjae.

Why were you so satisfied with having a label of no label?

“Hey!” Hyunjae suddenly appears behind you, scaring the fuck out of you. “What are you thinking so deeply about?” He chuckles, tucking his hands in his hoodie.

“How I should murder you for being so late. Come on, it’s graduation day and we’re fucking late,” You hiss at him playfully, making him chuckle. “If only Eunbin wasn’t part of the organization, I would be walking with her by now,”

“And leave me? I bet you can’t,” Hyunjae asks– it was supposed to be a joke. You should be taking it lightly. Why did it hit harder now?

“You bet right then,” You just say under your breath, sighing.

“What?”

“I said you should fucking walk faster or I’ll come for your throat. My parents are already there,” You groan, looking at the time.

“You’re walking behind me!” Hyunjae defends, an offended look on his face. He aggressively walks to you, then lifts you on your feet to his shoulders.

“Hyunjae! My hair! I took hours for this!” You continue to hit his back, trying to save your oh-so-messy hair now.

When he drops you, you’re already in front of the school gates.

“I swear to god, one day– I might just,” Raising your fist, you manage to threaten Hyunjae as he backs away from your hit.

Combing your hair smoothly against your hair with a pout on your face, Hyunjae watches for a second before dropping his and your things on the floor, standing in front of you.

He smiles at you, then removes your hand from it. He takes the time to smoothen your hair, giving it the most natural look it can get after ruining it. You made this time to look at Hyunjae, feeling your cheeks flush at the proximity.

Your heart was thumping more than it ever did around Hyunjae. You didn’t want to admit it, no. You just liked Hyunjae.

But did it matter? You were neither friends nor lovers. There were a lot of times that what you did with Hyunjae proved that the line between friends and lovers was blurred. You were confused, scared.

But satisfied.

If it meant that you were both happy, you were satisfied.

You shouldn’t have been.

“There,” Hyunjae smugly looks at you, proud of his work. “Are you ready to get out of high school?” He asks with an expecting smile, making you chuckle. He reaches his hand out for you to take, dragging you inside in a rush.

──────────── ·  ·  ·  · ✦

“You’re still going to visit me, right?” Youngjae asks, sobbing childishly as he hugged Hyunjae tightly. Hyunjae simply hums, letting Youngjae dampen his regalia with his hat in hand.

Bidding your parents goodbye to hang out a little with your friends, you laughed at the sight.

“As if we’re going so far, Youngjae,” You squint your eyes at him then looked at Hyunjae, who begged you to come to get the sobbing man. You open your arms for Youngjae and he doesn’t hesitate to get to your embrace, mumbling small I’ll miss you’s, and continuously asking to come and visit him from time to time.

“Youngjae, Hyungseo," You call your friends’ attention, looking at Hyunjae for confirmation. He leaves with a light jog, smiling. “Hyunjae and I kinda prepared a surprise for you. I hope you’re all free?”

“Hell yeah, we are,” Hyungseo mumbles, and you lead them out of the place and to the parking lot. They seemed excited, which was good. You just wished your surprise went as planned.

“By the way, where’s Eunbin?” Hyungseo asks, making a small effort to enlighten the atmosphere.

“Ah, she already went home. Wanting to spend the special day with her parents. If y’all are still free in the week, she said she’ll make time,” The small talk continued until you were finally in the parking lot, asking them to close their eyes for a sec.

“y/n, I swear, if my pretty faces come flat on the–”

“You can open your eyes!” Cutting Youngjae off, they squinted their eyes that later formed tears.

Changmin was in front of them. The kids that grew up well with them in the daycare were all there, smiling proudly at the two.

“Oh my god,” Hyungseo’s hand comes in contact with his mouth, containing his sobs.

He counts– Changmin. Hyunjae. Juyeon. Chanhee. Younghoon. Joonyoung. Sangyeon. Hyunjoon. Sunwoo. Haknyeon. Everybody was there– and he could vividly remember their faces but still managed to know who’s who. Because if you didn’t get it, Hyungseo was the most observant man you’d ever seen.

Youngjae collapses in his place, hugging his knees. His dream finally came true– they were complete. He hesitates to look at them the second time, scared that if he did they might disappear, scared that it was all a dream.

It wasn’t. When he feels your hand caress his back to encourage him, he looks up to you with hopeful eyes.

“They’re finally here, Youngjae.” You whisper, and later it is all drowned as all of them run to Youngjae with big smiles on their faces, ruffling his hair. You take a step back, giving them the space they needed.

You just lovingly stare at them, and you only realize that Hyunjae and Changmin just stare from afar too, Changmin’s arm loosely slung around the slightly taller man’s shoulders.

And you have never felt so proud of someone else before.

“You should go with us. We’re planning on eating outside,” Changmin smiles softly at you, like how he did when Hyunjae dragged you inside his home that night.

“No, sir– uh, Changmin..? Teacher Changmin? I don’t know– but it’s okay! You should have time for yourselves since it’s been a long time and–”

“y/n’s going!” Hyunjae cuts you off, pushing you to walk with them.

“Hyunjae, no! You fuck– you should spend time with them,”

“Ah! You should get to know them,” He giddily smiles, even wiggling his hips as he continues to push you. Ignoring your protests, you just suddenly see yourself sitting beside who you knew was Sangyeon and Hyunjae.

“Hello,” Sangyeon mumbles, before taking a seat. You smile at him, awkwardly shuffling on your seat. “I’m Sangyeon,” Not wanting to have an awkward atmosphere between the both of you, he starts a conversation.

“Hi! Yes, hello. I’m y/n,” You were good at socializing, but being with the people who knew each other but you, you start feeling left out and awkward.

“I assume you’ve met at least half of us?” Sangyeon says, handing you one of the foods to let you get some.

“Thanks. Yeah, I’ve met Sunwoo, Younghoon, and Chanhee once a while back, because of Youngjae and Hyungseo,” You explain, instantly finding comfort in talking to him. “And if running into your.. Teacher? Counts.. Then I’ve met him a couple of times too, because of Hyunjae.”

The conversation flows naturally as if you’ve known each other for years.

Hyunjae notices this but doesn’t talk about it since, well, making friends was your thing in the first place.

The chats fade in the background, one voice toppling over another. You– or they, caught up with each other and chatted the night away.

“Right, y/n,” Changmin calls for your attention after introducing you to everybody bashfully. “Hyunjae mentioned that you’d want to apply for Harvard with him?”

With everybody’s eyes on you, you grew nervous. Hyunjae notices this, taking a hold of your hand under the table.

“Uh, yeah. I mentioned it to him first, though,” You squint your eyes at Hyunjae, making most of them chuckle. “But yeah. Just wanted to try though. If I pass, then I pass, I’d gladly take the offer. If I don’t, then it’d be okay too, there are various outstanding universities here anyway,” You answer, and Changmin just nods.

“Tell me if you pass and are going, though. I can offer you a lodge so that you wouldn’t be hassled,” Changmin offered and you nodded thankfully.

Spending the afternoon with them, you found their company very relaxing and playful. Though you weren’t able to have a conversation with half of them, at least, they made you feel like you were one of them.

After exchanging numbers with them, and them with each other, they finally bid their temporary goodbyes, promising to have another meet-up soon and to be in contact with one another.

“It was fun getting to know you,” Sangyeon says before sweetly patting your head, heading his way after nodding at Hyunjae.

“Lovebirds,” Changmin calls for someone, making you look at him and around. It was only you and Hyunjae left.

Confused, you pointed at yourself as Changmin chuckled.

“Yes, the both of you. Aren’t you heading home yet?” Changmin steps closer to the both of you, his car keys dangling between his fingers.

“I’m taking y/n somewhere first, then I’ll take them home,” Hyunjae says, looking around to see if it was still worth dragging you out for the night.

“Make sure you do,” Changmin reprimands and bid goodbye before going his way.

“Where are you taking me again?” Squinting your eyes, you follow Hyunjae to where he was heading.

“The park. I’m just.. So overwhelmed today. So I wanted a night out,”

“You did well today, Hyunjae. I’ve never seen you so happy,” He hums in agreement because it was indeed the happiest he’s been after years. “I’m uselessly proud of you,” You chuckle at your own words, trying to think of any reason why you’re so proud of him but there was none.

“I need to thank you for everything,” Hyunjae says, taking a seat on one of the free places on the grass. It was already dark, so there were only a few people around.

“You don’t need to, Hyunjae. All I did was stay beside you.”

“That’s why,” He lays on his back, prompting you to do the same. Before your head touches the grass, Hyunjae’s arms spread to make it a pillow for yours.

The gesture was small, but your heart was thumping out of your ribcage.

“You’ve always been there. And without you, I don’t know where the fuck I am now,” He sighs, folding his elbows to scoot you closer to him.

You act nonchalantly, looking straight into his eyes. You think you just saw the stars in it. You see sincerity, fondness, and if you weren’t imagining it– love.

He sighs out in relief, finally letting you lay in peace as you look at the now bright stars.

“I’ve always wanted to stargaze but never had the chance to,” You mumble, taking Hyunjae’s attention. “Now that I’m staring at it, it feels unreal.”

“It’s nice I dragged you with me again, then,” He smirks, calming his heart at the way it abnormally beats.

He asks himself all over again if you were feeling the way he was– or was this all normal for you? The countless flirty remarks and playful confessions can’t get to him, it was just all confusing.

And maybe he found himself just getting satisfied with what the both of you are now, too. He doesn’t want to overthink his feelings and yours, because if it really was something, it should’ve happened by now.

So he thought these were all normal. How you both act was normal. What you were.. Was normal.

“Shooting star!” You continuously smack Hyunjae’s chest, and when he groans, you intertwine your fingers to wish.

“You’re so childish,” Hyunjae mumbles, looking at the trace of where the shooting star was. Despite his words, his inner self made a quiet wish– and that was to maintain solemnity in his life full of chaos.

The solemnity was you.

“Hey. Not childish at all,” You retort after a few seconds, done with making a wish. “If it’s not true, then what’s there to lose?”

“Hope.” Hyunjae surprisingly had an answer to your rhetorical question, making you pout. Hyunjae laughs at you, tucking you closer to his side.

You realize that he was right. Hope. Because if your wish was to be with Hyunjae like this forever, and it wouldn’t come true, your hope melts into nothingness.

──────────── ·  ·  ·  · ✦

“You reveal your universities first!” You pout, hiding the bunch of welcoming papers behind your back as Hyunjae did the same.

“Fine, then! I can just ask Eunbin for yours,” Hyunjae sticks his tongue out, and you whine.

“That’s not fair! Why don’t we just reveal it together?” You stomp like a child on your place, making Hyunjae chuckle.

“One, two, three!” You both squeal at having the same designs of papers, passing the same universities even in college.

After exchanging papers and sharing a quiet, knowing look, the smiles on your faces continue to grow, “SNU!” You simultaneously shout your choices, squealing when you both said the same university.

“We should enroll together with Hyungseo to at least get one minor together,” Hyunjae suggests, and you could only nod at the excitement of starting college soon.

“We both didn’t pass Harvard, but we can try again next year,” You chuckled, wiggling your hips as Hyunjae joined you.

Nothing stopped the both of you from gluing your hips together. You both were inseparable– whether it may be your breaks, or walking home back again. The universities weren’t that far from your homes, saving you more money than expected.

You think nothing changed. You still had him, Hyungseo often hangs out with the both of you, Eunbin– who was schooling in the neighboring university, also hangs out normally with you.

You think nothing changed.

Until it did.

“Hyunjae!” You see him hanging outside the room with the class you shared with him and Hyungseo, leaning on the wall. “Were you waiting for me? Aw, so swee–”

“Waiting my ass. Just go inside and save me a seat, will you?” He chuckles, and you thought he was joking. So you hopped inside the room, saving the two seats beside you and the other for Hyungseo.

“Hyun– he’s not here.” You mumble, your eyes tracking back to the windows that showed a little of Hyunjae’s side. “The fuck?”

You look at him for a few seconds while getting your things out of your bag, pouting when he still hasn’t moved an inch. You suppose he was just waiting for Hyungseo.

He wasn’t.

Standing on both feet, Hyunjae finally straightens his back as he smiles oh-so-sweetly to a girl you don’t know and can’t familiarize, his hand scratching his neck bashfully as he reaches out to her.

For the first time, you feel your heart breaking at just the sight.

No. It’s just friendly talk. With the shy smile plastered on Hyunjae’s face, and his hands that kept flying to his neck, to the way he timidly twirled in his place– you wished it was friendly talk.

“He’s going to melt at that point if you keep on staring at him like that,” Hyungseo walks to you, taking the other seat. You only smile at him, trying to focus on taking your things out as you trail your eyes on your things.

It didn’t last long. When you hear your professor’s heels clacking on the tiled floor, your eyes panic as you see Hyunjae pass the door.

“He’s going to be fucking late,” You mumble, quickly standing up to run to the floor and to him, stopping only on the doorsill to see him only in the next room.

Perfect timing– you guess. The girl was just giving him his phone back, also heaving a sweet smile on her face. You see Hyunjae’s ears turn red, chuckling to himself as he takes his phone back and bids goodbye to the girl, as she finally strides back to her room.

Hyunjae turns to go to his room, as he sees you with empty eyes looking at him.

“What’s wrong with you?” He asks, waving his hand in front of you. You shot back to your senses, eyes darting anywhere but his.

“You’re going to be late, loser,” Punching his chest lightly, you jog back to your seat, but not where you were a while ago. Hyungseo coincidentally has another available seat on his other side, taking that seat after pushing your things to that side.

“What are you doing?” Hyungseo watches you do your thing confusingly, but lets you anyway.

Before Hyunjae had even entered the door, you had naturally taken your seat. Your heart aches, but you don’t let it show. It aches, but you ignore it.

It was too early to assume. Because who knows if they only exchanged numbers because of group work? A project? Just a newly made friend that you wanted their number? Who even knows if they exchanged numbers? Hyunjae must’ve left his phone in his last class who happened to be with her and had his phone.

Coincidences– you wished.

Hyunjae, puzzled, takes his seat beside Hyungseo. It was weird that you weren’t in the middle, where you usually were, but he let class continue anyway.

It was a heavy feeling. Ominous one. Yet you keep burying it under and deep in your heart. It isn’t that big. It was. And you yourself knew it.

You told everything to Eunbin, in hopes of telling it to someone might make the feeling in your chest lighten in the slightest– but it doesn’t.

Because you were watching the person you loved fall in love with someone else right in front of your eyes.

Hard-headed. Eunbin says. You throw the feeling again for the nth time. Avoid him. Eunbin says. You can’t– and you didn’t have a reason to.

Eating popsicles on your break at the bleachers, you lazily watch the soccer players kick the ball around with Hyunjae on your side.

“Number 13 will definitely score,” You mumble, making Hyunjae chuckle.

“No. Number 24 will,” He retorts, pointing his popsicle at number 24.

“Aight, bet,” You smile slyly, and the both of you intently watch the small game that was happening feet away from you. “Come on, number 13! You always score!” You shout, removing the popsicle from your mouth and garnering half the field’s attention. Hyunjae pulls you down, covering your mouth with his big ass hands.

“You’re so embarrassing,” Hyunjae mumbles, popping the flavored ice in his mouth to get you in a chokehold.

Faking a cough, Hyunjae finally lets you go as you huff.

“Ah.. my hair, Hyunjae!” You exasperatingly sigh, combing your hair. And just like that day– graduation, Hyunjae helps you with it. Heart thumping, cheeks red.

Hyunjae suddenly pushes your head to the side.

“What in the fuck–” You stop yourself from cursing, seeing Hyunjae grow that smile again. It wasn’t the cheeky little smile he always gave you– it was one that he always gave her.

And just like you expected, she was walking in front of the bleachers as she shyly waved at Hyunjae, unaware of your existence beside him.

And just like how your heart was thumping abnormally just seconds ago, it broke a thousand beats more.

“We have finals left before turning into second years,” Hyungseo groans, “and it feels like we’ve been college students for ten years already,” You chuckle at his words, continuing to do your own work.

Feeling your phone vibrate, you fish it out of your pockets mindlessly and check your received messages.

hyunjaehyun: i know finals is right around the corner hyunjaehyun: but are you free later around eight? hyunjaehyun: i want to treat you something good me: who am i to deny free food?

Smiling to yourself, you put your phone back in your pockets as you try your best hiding your smile that only continues to grow.

“Right– y/n. You still plan on submitting an application to Harvard for next year with Hyunjae, right?” Hyungseo asks you, momentarily stopping his hands from writing his modules.

“Yeah, and Hyunjae probably forgot it. I’ll ask him later, though,” You nod, mentally noting yourself to ask Hyunjae about it later.

“I wish you the best. You’ll still keep in contact, right? Because I’ll make Teacher Changmin hunt you down if you don’t,” Hyungseo pouts, squinting his eyes at you as he waits for you to reply.

Setting your pen down, you face him properly.

“How could I leave the people I cherish the most here without my love?” You appealed, winking at him. Squealing both in happiness, you forget your worries for your finals as you chat away instead of finishing your reviewers.

──────────── ·  ·  ·  · ✦

Heaving a deep sigh, you excitedly waited on your seat where Hyunjae asked you to meet, a smile on your face. It has been so long since Hyunjae initiated that the both of you eat outside, now that college was happening, your frequent avoidance to him because of your feelings and just you basically being an indecisive person.

One last confession. If he doesn’t take it seriously now..

“Hyunjae!” You raise your hand like a kid, a wide smile on your face as you try getting his attention.

Your heart drops.

That same girl.

That same girl was wearing Hyunjae’s hoodie that you were just borrowing last month.

He was now trailing behind Hyunjae’s broad back, their intertwined hands hidden behind her sweater paws.

Your smile falls, the habit of your nails unconsciously picking on your fingers anxiously coming back.

“y/n,” You hear it even from afar. You can hear it even from miles away. You’ll hear it even when you’re alone. His sweet, soft voice that always called out to you, it remained in your brain, your heart.

And there was no way of erasing it.

He gently tugs her arm, pointing at you.

You keep a small smile, but your eyes just– your eyes just can’t hide anything at the moment. You try your best, but with the excruciating pain you were feeling in your chest, it was impossible.

Hyunjae, the gentleman that he is, pulls the chair for her in front of you, then takes the seat next to hers.

You smile at her politely, showing a little bit of confusion but nothing that might throw her off the wrong impression. Trailing your eyes back to Hyunjae slowly, you give him a look.

“I know we’re all busy. But I just can’t keep it anymore– Jihyun, meet y/n. y/n, meet Jihyun,” He giddily smiles, two of the most important people to him at the moment meeting, “my girlfriend,”

You stop– everything does. From your breathing to the world spinning. It takes time to sink in, and thinking about it more is breaking you little by little, feeling like dying a slow death. It was suffocating.

And with a single fiddle of your nail to your thumb, you feel it sting. It's what brings you back to your senses, your eyes brimming with tears.

“W-why.. Are you crying?” Hyunjae dumbfoundedly shifts on his seat, hesitating whether to caress you like he always did when you broke down in front of him.

“Sorry– Jihyun. Hello, nice to meet you,” You sob, but pull a smile anyway. “I am so fucking sorry,” You sigh, trying to stabilize your breaths.

“Hi.. y/n. Hyunjae told me a lot about you and I’ve seen you around him too, with Hyungseo,” She warily smiles, taking your hand for a shake. “Are you okay?”

Why the fuck does she need to be kind, too?

Why does god always play favorites?

Why does it need to be you who’s breaking?

But then you think again– you’d rather let yourself break than him.

“I’m so sorry, I’m just..” Your eyes land on Hyunjae. It was blurry because of your tears, and it continued to be blurred by your tears. It was hard to stop, with the way you think someone’s hand was clutching your heart. “So proud of Hyunjae,” You mumble, smiling at him.

It hurt. There was nothing more to say, more to describe how you were feeling.

“I’m so proud of him because I’ve seen him look at you from afar,” Your eyes asked for help. But this was the first time Hyunjae couldn’t read you out of all the years he had known you. It was right in front of his eyes– how you were desperate to show him all the love in the world, how you were so desperate that you’d give him all the stars in the sky.

But he was already blinded by the love he had, that he knew was reciprocated.

No confusion, no holding back.

“I’m so proud of him because he deserves everything he has now. So thank you, Jihyun,” You mumble, not a second did your eyes look away from Hyunjae.

You ask with your eyes, just one more time. Read me, Hyunjae. I love you. I’m here. I’m here, I’m here.. I was always here.

But when he smiles proudly then breaks eye contact to look lovingly at Jihyun who did the same, you realize that the stars you saw in his eyes that night you stargazed together, finally shined for someone else’s sky.

“Thank you, y/n,” Jihyun mumbles, her sweet smile so sickeningly too nice for you.

You want to cry your heart out. You wanted to scream. You wanted.. you wanted to let Hyunjae know how much you loved him. You wanted him to know that ever since the beginning, you loved him.

You always had.

Too late.

"I look like a fucking idiot. I'm so sorry, let me just go to the washroom real quick and redeem my pretty face," You excuse yourself, nearly bumping into a few people as you buzz your way to the washroom.

The moment you hear the lock click, your back meets the cold wall. You stare at your reflection hopelessly, looking like a living dead. Your eyes puffy, cheeks dump, and a heart shredded to pieces.

Everything was all over the place, and you closed your eyes to take a minute to yourself.

It was as simple as admitting it was your fault. If you would've told him you loved him earlier, maybe, just maybe, he would've taken your feelings into consideration.

But maybe it wasn't all your fault to hoard. What were the times he looked at you like you were the most precious gem there is? What were the times he held you like he never wanted to let you go? What were the times where he discreetly showed affection to you?

Did you read things too much, or did Hyunjae take things too far?

With the soft knocks on the door, you knew you took too much time. Washing your face quickly and wiping it, you mumbled continuous apologies to the next one in line.

You dreaded coming back. It was basic manners, yet you pulled the Eunbin called and needed help in her house card, excusing yourself to the couple.

"It's late, we can just hang out again after the finals and we can take you home right now." Hyunjae tries to stop you, grabbing your wrist.

You softly wriggle your hand out of his grip, smiling at them.

"It's okay. Take this time to go treat your girlfriend instead of me. You never owe me anything anyway,"

He did. An explanation. An explanation you craved but didn't even know what kind of explanation.

"Okay," A soft pout forming on his lips, disappointed with how you were acting.

"Jihyun. I'm so sorry," You look at her once more, "It was nice meeting you. I'll see you around and.. please," You smile.

As if it was waving a white flag, surrendering.

"Take care of him,"

──────────── ·  ·  ·  · ✦

"Congratulations, y/n!" Hyungseo pops a glass of champagne, pointing it at you. "For being a Harvard passer!"

Everyone hollers, Eunbin included. Everyone was here– from Sangyeon, and his friends from the daycare, your closest friends you made in college, the littlest people you remember back in high school, Hyungseo and Youngjae.

Except for Hyunjae.

Even their Teacher Changmin was here– having to ignore his jet lag from flying from Osaka because of his ongoing tour.

It was a surprise made for you, prepared by Changmin and Hyungseo, Eunbin, Youngjae, and Sangyeon.

Hiding your disappointed face when your eyes distinguish light after being covered for a few minutes, you sense Hyungseo kept on checking his phone.

"Sangyeon," You mumble when you see him striding closer to you. "Thank you so much," You smile softly, feeling grateful that even though having interacted only a few times, he helped set everything up.

"It's nothing. You deserve it. Congratulations again," He smiles back, offering you company for a few minutes.

"Thanks," You gulp the non-alcoholic drink in your hand, making an effort to make small talk.

"You're going to take that scholarship, right?" Sangyeon curiously asks, his eyes beaming with it.

"I uh, still going to think about it." You answer truthfully, "I can just apply again if I decide against it now,"

"We even surprised you!"

"Hey! Not my fault you guys decided to surprise me! I didn't even tell anyone I passed," You retort, whining almost.

You and Sangyeon exchange a few more, before Hyungseo coming back and forth from the kitchen finally pisses you off.

"Sorry, Hyungseo's anxious ass is ticking me off. I'll just talk to him for a sec," You excuse yourself playfully at Sangyeon, then striding to the kitchen. "Hyungseo, you've been in and out of the kitchen a hundred times already in the minutes I was talking to Sang, is there something wrong?"

"y/n! Nah, nothing's wrong.." He awkwardly giggles, taking another glance at his phone.

Grabbing his phone, you finally realized why he was so anxious.

me: jae, we're throwing a surprise party for yn me: where the hell are you me: jae me: jae, you're one of their best friends where the fuck are you

And tons more unread messages from Hyungseo to Hyunjae. With a sigh, Hyungseo lets you scroll through the messages.

You were about to hand it back when it suddenly vibrated, and you naturally look at it.

hyunjae: i'm busy today. i don't think i can go. just tell yn i'm busy. hyunjae: what's with the surprise party tho

"This fuck–" Hyungseo mutters, but it didn't matter. you had already read the message, bringing the phone back to him. "I'm so sorry,"

"Hyungseo, the hell are you sorry for?" You chuckled, masking your disappointment once again. "Don't tell him. I'll bring the news to him," You wink, trying to lighten Hyungseo's worries.

It amazingly does. Hyungseo agrees though still worried, he lets it slip off his mind to enjoy the party he coordinated.

The party ended after a few hours, leaving a little more than you had expected, but it was a little fun, nevertheless.

The daycare kids and Changmin were the only ones left, discussing if they were to barge in Hyunjae's crib to see him for at least a second.

Changmin sensed your discomfort the very least, and he read you. You wanted to talk to Hyunjae soonest, and you were planning that night, that second.

"We should all just go home," Changmin suggests, smiling at you. You smile back thankfully. "Hyunjae's probably tired by now. Let's not tire him up more. Finals just happened, let him rest all he can,"

And they all agree. Sangyeon takes a second look at you, finally reading the room.

After tons of sweet goodbyes, and lastly, from Eunbin, you were finally left alone.

Pondering, you continued to sigh if you were just to walk to his house and talk to him.

What did you even want to talk about? It's been a whole month since the incident, and you talked less. Hung out less. Everything less.

But with the calming rain finally pouring, you realize that maybe, it was a sign to talk to him.

Stepping out in just your hoodie and your pants, you walk to his house while slowly getting drenched in the rain.

Taking your time, you think and think again of what to say to him. But when did you ever need to have something to say? You can simply just barge in there.

It wasn't that late. You knew Hyunjae always has a hard time sleeping, you were positive he was still awake. And judging from the lights from the inside, you knew he still is.

Knocking on the door excitedly, you habitually tipped on your toes as you tucked your hands in your pockets for warmth.

Your hair was damp, but you didn't mind. Just like what you said to Hyunjae, you loved the rain. It made you feel calm.

"y/n?" Hyunjae opens the door dumbfoundedly, shocked. "What are you doing here at this hour?" You chuckle at his state, messy bed hair, shirt crumpled as if he just picked it up from the floor.

"I should be asking you the same. When did I ever need to have a reason to visit you?" You scoff, stepping to the side to try and force yourself inside.

You stop.

There she was, Jihyun. On another one of Hyunjae's big hoodies, one that you remember he was wearing earlier in the school today.

In just his hoodie.

Bed hair.

Hickeys.

You swallow the forming dry lump on your throat, trying to process everything.

If you think you broke that day when he introduced Jihyun to you, then you broke more today.

"Ah," You bite your lip, this time not just trying, but doing your best not to cry. "I didn't know. I'm so sorry,"

You can't take it anymore. You excuse yourself before Jihyun even sees you, but Hyunjae stops you once again.

"It's pouring. Do you want an umbrella? Where the hell are you heading now?" Hyunjae continues to ask, getting nothing but sniffs from you. "y/n,"

"Don't worry. I'll be fine in the rain. Did you forget? I love the rain. I'll just be heading to Eunbin's, so no worries. Enjoy the night," You try to laugh. Your voice breaks.

"y/n. I'm sure you came here for a reason. Tell me first,"

"I can tell you tomorrow, you know." With a pat on his arm, you smile reassuringly.

Hyunjae does nothing to stop you once more as you dove through the harsh droplets of the rain, Jihyun's soft calls making him tear his eyes away from your fading form.

You loved the rain for another reason. It sympathized with you. It drowned your tears.

But that was also the day where the rain had given you a reason to hate it.

──────────── ·  ·  ·  · ✦

Tomorrow never came for Hyunjae.

As he waited and waited for you in the halls, you never came the whole day. Even in your shared class.

"Hey, have any idea where y/n is?" He asks Hyungseo, who only gives him a shrug.

"Now, you care?" Hyungseo sighs exhaustingly, looking at Hyunjae with eyes he can't fathom.

"What do you mean?" Hyunjae pouts. He thinks back to last night, where he failed to attend your surprise party, "What was the party for, anyway?"

"y/n said they'll be the one to tell you," Hyungseo answers timidly, gathering his things and leaving Hyunjae alone in his thoughts.

What was the party for? Did he forget something? Why weren't you around today? Did you get sick? Or did you just oversleep and decided to just sleep in? Or were you just too tired from last night?

Hyunjae shakes the questions away, remembering the embarrassing moment you had encountered with him and Jihyun last night. He feels his heart drop to his stomach, feeling bad.

"I can just ask her tomorrow,"

Tomorrow never came once again. Neither the next. And the next.

It eventually slipped his mind, being preoccupied with his small projects and professing his love for Jihyun. Neither did he notice how his friends slowly slipped away from his side, but it was all on him.

Not until you suddenly just show up, did you glue Hyungseo and Hyunjae again.

You just thanked the gods you only shared one class with Hyunjae.

"Where the fuck have you been all week? You've been MIA, always out of your house and Eunbin and Hyungseo wouldn't tell me where you were." He rambles, but you just smile at him.

"Before we start our lesson, let me congratulate y/n.." You sigh, burrowing your chin on your chest shyly. You managed to shut your friends up from blabbering about the news, but your professors. You've been receiving tons of applause because of them. "For passing the Harvard application,"

Everybody claps again, and Hyungseo proudly.

"Congratulations again," Hyungseo smiles widely, giving you a light hug.

"You knew?" Hyunjae asks Hyungseo, who only looked at him disappointingly. “Why didn’t you tell me?” He faces you. Stupid question.

The cheers fade in the background, everything dawning on Hyunjae. He felt bad, not being there when he promised to take it together with you.

"You were always busy so.." You mumbled, pressing your lips to a thin line wryly. "It's okay. It's nothing big," You shook your hand in front of his face, trying to dismiss the depleting atmosphere between the three of you.

He felt worse. How he faked he was busy, how he slowly pushed his friends away because he wanted a life of his own with his girlfriend.

"That was why you came to my house that night?" Hyunjae softly asks as the lecture starts, but you stay quiet, only giving him a sigh.

“Hey, do you have time later? I wanted to go get some coffee,” You reach out to both of them when the professor stepped out of the room, sighs leaving out of your lips.

“Yeah, let’s hang out for a little. It’s been a while,” Hyungseo agrees cooly, waiting for Hyunjae.

Hyunjae ponders– this time, he really is busy.

“Sorry.. It’s Jihyun and I’s monthsary,” He mumbles, and he feels bad yet again. He wanted to go, but he just couldn't cancel on Jihyun last minute.

“It’s okay,” Your smile didn’t reach your ears, and Hyunjae noticed it. Even how you’re rushing to get your things to walk out of the room. He notices everything but holds himself back from pointing it out.

He should’ve had.

Who knew it was the last time Hyunjae had the chance to talk to you properly?

──────────── ·  ·  ·  · ✦

"y/n. Tell me where the hell have you been the whole week?" Hyungseo catches up to you, ditching his last class to get coffee with you right at that instant.

"I was doing fine, thank you," You chuckle, tucking your books back to your locker.

"And I quote– y/n's hospitalized. I found her laying on my porch drenched in rainwater the morning after the party. I took her in and was shivering in the cold. Took her temperature, and I'm not exaggerating when I say this, it was almost 50 degrees. so I rushed her to a hospital because I thought y/n's dying. Oh. Tell Hyunjae I said fuck him. By Eunbin!"

"Eunbin's exaggerating," You chuckle once more, calming Hyungseo. "I'm okay now. You don't need to worry,"

“I’m going to tell Hyunjae,” Hyungseo huffs, turning his back on you. You quickly got his wrist, stopping him.

“Hyungseo,” You breathe out, tears forming in your eyes. Your eyes didn’t fail a day these past weeks crying for him, and pulling a stunt awhile ago to stop your tears from falling in front of him made you weak the moment you hear his name. “Please don’t,” You smile pleadingly, chuckling at yourself as you wipe your tears away.

“y/n..” Hyungseo mumbles, slowly pulling you to his embrace. Hyungseo wasn’t dumb– nor blind like Hyunjae. He knew your feelings toward the man without even asking you. It was as clear as day, and he didn’t need someone to spell your feelings for Hyungjae out to him. “I’m so sorry..” He mutters but knows it did little to nothing to aid your aching heart.

And for some fucking, stupid reason, even with your heart feeling it was slowly dying, you can’t just avoid Hyunjae.

It was suffocating to see, hear Hyunjae all over the girl he loved. It broke you. But you still found your way to him.

It was Hyunjae’s wish.

Despite his words, his inner self made a quiet wish– and that was to maintain solemnity in his life full of chaos.

The solemnity was you.

The shooting star decided to listen to Hyunjae that night, ignoring yours.

Out of all the people who made a wish through that shooting star, it decided to listen to Hyunjae’s.

“Hope.” Hyunjae surprisingly had an answer to your rhetorical question, making you pout. Hyunjae laughs at you, tucking you closer to his side.

You realize that he was right. Hope. Because if your wish was to be with Hyunjae like this forever, and it wouldn’t come true, your hope melts into nothingness.

You realized the weight of his words the moment he said it.

Why did you still hope?

Why did you still hope that your wish will come true?

In your mid-twenties, you’re still crying over the man. You’ve finished college, you’re planning to take your masters– everything changed.

Everything changed but your feelings for Hyunjae.

“Eunbin,” You cry out, instantly breaking down when she opens the door. She knew you were going to run to her. With sorrowful eyes, she cried with you as she engulfs you in a hug. It broke everyone who knew your feelings for Hyunjae. Changmin, Sangyeon, Hyungseo, Youngjae, Eunbin, your parents.

It broke them because they were torn.

Because Hyunjae will never know what you did for him. To what extent you did as you made him your priority over yourself. Your happiness.

Hyunjae was finally happy. He’s getting wedded to the person who made him happy, who loved him with all her heart.

But didn’t you also make Hyunjae happy? Didn’t you also help change Hyunjae’s perspective on the world? Weren’t you the one who was right there with Hyunjae throughout and fought with him?

Weren’t you?

“I can’t believe I ended up getting an invitation than a wedding ring,” You chuckled lifelessly, clutching on Eunbin as you cried, sobbing harder.

There was no chickening out now. You were the next in line, as you gripped on the bouquet once more.

“Let’s go!” You internally screamed, pulling the best smile you could.

Hyunjae was there, standing like the pulchritudinous man that he is in his tux, smiling at you proudly as he waited for you to walk down the aisle.

It makes you chuckle, how there was a line of eleven men as his best man smiling back at you. Bashfully covering your face with the bouquet in your hand for a moment, everything slows down.

It was wonderfully amazing for Hyunjae, how he was now seeing you walk down the aisle in person. When all he ever did was imagine it once. After that night he sobbed at you like a baby, when you both slow danced under the rain when he got the courage to land a kiss on your forehead like how he imagined before– the day after, he had imagined you waking to him down the aisle, but in reality, you were just waltzing down the hallways of your school.

It amazed Hyunjae, that now, you were making way for the bride.

“Congratulations, loser. You won,” You mumbled, winking at him before stepping aside for the bride.

“Bet I’ll get married first before you?” Hyunjae challenges, pouting at you as he huffs. You both apparently were arguing that both of your lovelife was so empty, only having each other even after years.

“Deal!” You shout back, taking the challenge. “But my deal is we’ll get married on the same day, in the same church, together,” Slyly and smoothly telling him your part of the deal, he just scoffs in disbelief and pinky promises to seal the bet.

Striding swiftly to your seat beside Eunbin who proudly smiled at you, you watch as the love of your life gets wedded, blinking back the tears that continuously formed in your eyes.

Seeing them smile at each other, you were at your endpoint– the end of the line.

So you wish.

Now that he wasn’t for you in this lifetime, you wish to at least, meet him again in your next.

And if destiny was now on your side, you wish to be his’ in your next.

But if it still isn’t, you’d rather go through all the pain, if it meant meeting him.

If going through all the pain meant seeing Hyunjae happy as he was now, it was okay.

You’re going to be okay.

At least, you hoped.

Hyunjae sighs as he wipes the sweat off his forehead, tired of having to move furniture here and there, after moving houses with Jihyun.

Lifting the last piece of furniture, a neatly folded paper, one he found so familiar slipping out of the sofa.

“Oh?” Mumbling, he mindlessly opened the paper with a smile on his face, seeing your usual doodling outside the paper.

It was a heavy feeling, opening one of the papers you gave him after a while. But still, he continued.

Hyunjae.

I promised myself one last confession– but it was also the day you introduced Jihyun to me, so I never got to. I swear to god, I don’t intend on homewrecking, it’s the last thing I want, seeing you so happy with Jihyun.

But Hyunjae. All my confessions, I want you to know they’re all real. I want to let you know, say it once– I love you. I always did, the moment I laid my eyes on you.

But.. I don’t know. Maybe it was destiny playing with me, or us. I know that you know there was something between us. Neither can I deny that. There was always something, a connection, or whatever the hell you call it– we just never pointed it out.. Until it became something normal. We made it normal.

As I watched you fall in love with someone else slowly, right in front of my eyes.. I realized that maybe it was my fault. For not having the courage to clear things up. For not having to tell you what I really felt– but I did. And the baton is thrown to you. “It’s your fault,” I wanted to tell you. I wanted to scream at you, make you see that it was your fault for not taking what I said seriously. I wanted to be angry, I wanted to throw a fit.

You’re definitely winning the bet– getting married first. I don’t know when you are, but you will be. Writing this before you get wedded feels weird. Slipping this in the creaks of your sofa as I sit here for the last time feels weird. I hope Jihyun doesn’t see this, nor do you. I just.. Wanted to take another chance to let you know how I feel.

I’m sorry.

I’m so sorry for taking too long. I’m so sorry for saying this now when you’re happy and content at the point of your life.

I’m sorry for loving you and for selfishly loving you, still.

Because I don’t think I’ll stop soon. And this is the part where I blame you for it. For being you– for making me fall. For making me think that maybe, the end line will be us.

But it still isn’t your fault.

And I’m so so lost because I want to blame someone that’s not you. I want to blame someone, but there’s no one.

Hyunjae, I love you. I should’ve said that when I could. And I’m so sorry that I only got to do that now.

But please, please know.. That I wouldn’t hesitate– even for a second to choose you in every lifetime there is for me.

Even if I know that you wouldn’t choose me.

Because you wouldn’t even choose me in this lifetime.

I gave you everything. Love, reassurance, care, everything. But I realize that I cannot love you into loving me.

Everyone would say that you’re overflowing with my love. But they never bat an eye on me– now pleading for a droplet of yours– or anything I can get. Anything I can salvage.

I shouldn’t ever beg for someone’s love. You taught me that.

But just this once, I wanted someone.. But it’s you.

And I’m sorry it’s you.

I meant it when I said I’m proud of you.

I’ll always be proud of you, Hyunjae.

I promised I’ll always be here. I’m sorry that it’s all I can do– given that you already have someone else.

So, I’m sorry if I throw the baton at her. I trust her, that she’ll always be there.

Always,

y/n.

Hyunjae does nothing but looks at the empty words written on the fine paper, his tears smudging the littlest of the writings.

Maybe it was also because he had realized that it was all his fault, that he should’ve faced his feelings beforehand, that instead of becoming an almost or a maybe, you could’ve become more. And it was bad– having little to big regret when he read your letter after he's banded with somebody else's life.

[cloudykyu]

— [12:46 pm] staring at hyunjae’s sleeping figure, you can’t help but scoff. how could he sleep so peacefully during a time like this? his face was turned to you, cheek pressed to the desk as he let out tiny snores. reaching over, your hand makes contact with his other cheek with a ‘smack!’ and the boy jolts awake.

“what the hell, y/n?” he asks you, outraged that you just hit him for no reason. there was definitely a reason though.

“good morning bitchass,” you sneer. “you don’t get to rest while we’re in this hellhole.” the two of you had landed yourselves in lunchtime detention and it was all hyunjae’s fault. he had engulfed you in a hug when he was passing you in the hallway which caused you to fight with him to release you. you struggled against his strong grip with your heart beating in your ears at the sudden contact, finally settling for kicking his legs out from under him.

the commotion had garnered the attention of a few surrounding students, them cheering you two on because they thought it was a fight. stupid high schoolers. a teacher had exited their classroom at the noise and yelled at the two of you to knock it off, but hyunjae’s hold still wouldn’t let up and the teacher wrote up detention slips in order to get you two to stop tussling.

“I just wanted a hug, babe” he replies with a grin. “you’re the one who got violent. look, I even have a bruise to prove it!” hyunjae then leans down to roll up his jeans, a light purple hue appearing on his shin.

“you deserved it. who the hell told you to get in my personal space?” you huff, crossing your arms. “you’re annoying lee hyunjae in case you haven’t gotten the memo.”

“oh I definitely got it,” he replies. he scooches his desk closer to yours much to your dismay. “but doesn’t mean I believe it. I think you actually like me y/n.”

you blush at that, eyebrows shooting up as you turn to face the boy. he was way closer than you expected him to be, face inches from yours. “like you? please hyunjae, I think all those fan girls of yours have finally gotten to your head.”

hyunjae laughs and you hold back the urge to slap him again. “one day y/n,” he sighs, leaning his head on your shoulder and closing his eyes to get himself ready for another nap. “one day you’ll finally be honest with me and yourself.” you’re stunned in your seat. you could smell the fresh scent of his cologne invading your senses. it was almost as if it had sent you into overdrive and you couldn’t push the boy off, liking the warm feeling it brought you.

maybe he was right, maybe you did like him. but that was a battle to deal with another day. right now, you needed to survive these last minutes with the boy who constantly got on your nerves. your hand comes up again patting the boys cheek softly. “maybe so,” you whisper. “maybe so.”

from mani’s writing game! taglist: @deputyjuyeon​​​​​ @wonjaems​​​​​ @nyujjan​​​​​ @changminurheart​​​​​ @stxrles-nxmss​​​​​ @wooyoung-a​​​​​ @tr330​​​​​ @moonieric​​​​​ @exfolitae​​​​​ @cybersxn​​​​​ @softyfor-sweaterpaws​​​​​ @lilacdreams-00​​​​​ @nycol-ie​​​​​ @morauvmi​​​​​ @tsukypoetic​​​​​ @luvrbin​​​​​ @sohnkiss​​​

[seongyeonsart]

| 20:08 | — hyunjae x f!reader ೫ smut

➵ pet names, fingering, breeding kink, sir kink, dirty talk

you were trying not to squirm as hyunjae’s hand rested on your upper inner thigh, unaware of how he’s making you feel because of how he was so focused on the movie playing on the tv. his thumb started caressing your soft flesh, making you groan and hide your head on his neck.

“what’s wrong, baby? are you tired?” concern was evident in hyunjae’s voice as he continued caressing your inner thigh with his thumb, making you feel more hot and needy, whining in his neck as you tried to squeeze your thighs together.

hyunjae realized what was wrong, making him smirk. “oh? is my doll getting horny from this?” he squeezed your thigh, feeling your grip on his bicep tighten. “babe please..” you placed little kisses on his neck, hoping to get him to touch you. “please what princess? I need you to tell me what you want or else-”

“want you to touch me, p-please” you felt hyunjae shift to face you more, “open your legs for me.” you did what you’re told, cheeks red from embarrassment which made hyunjae bite his lip because of how beautiful you looked right now.

you sucked in a sharp breath when you felt his hand on your clothed heat, rubbing up and down. “such a needy bitch, aren’t you?” you whimpered, nodding, followed by a loud gasp when he suddenly pushed your panties aside before inserting a finger inside.

“oh fuck- mhmm!” he captured your lips, still pumping his fingers in and out of you. hyunjae added a second finger inside your dripping cunt, groaning when you lightly pulled a fistful of his hair.

“can you hear how wet you are, princess?” he mumbled in between kisses and you nodded, already panting as you felt your orgasm forming.

“o-oh, yes! fuck, hng~ hyunjae I’m-” a loud moan emitted from you as your juices, coated hyunjae’s fingers, dripping down on the bedsheets. you felt him standing up from the bed, unbuckling his belt and letting his member spring out, pre-cum dripping from the tip.

with your still weak and shaking legs, you got on all fours, “please fuck me, sir.” you begged, looking back at hyunjae who was staring at you with dark eyes as he stroked his length. “oh I will princess, I’ll fuck your tight little hole so hard that you won’t be able to walk all day tomorrow.”

hyunjae slammed himself right inside you, making your mouth gape. “you like being fucked like this huh? you love how my cock feels when I’m pounding it inside of you like this?” he gripped your waist to keep you steady as incoherent words left your mouth.

“am I fucking you dumb, princess? can’t get a word out of your mouth?” you buried your face on the pillow, gripping it tightly. hyunjae’s hands were on your ass, squeezing them as he bucked his hips at a rapid pace.

you felt the tip of his cock hitting your g-spot, making your eyes roll to the back of your head with a loud moan. “oh my god, y-yes! t-there.. right there!” hyunjae smirked to himself as he saw your reaction, repeatedly thrusting inside you harshly while you were a complete mess under him.

“f-fuck princess, you’re clenching so hard on me right now. I’m gonna.. c-cum,” you squirmed when hyunjae started playing with your clit, panting as you felt a knot forming in your stomach.

“cum inside me sir, p-please.. w-want you to stuff me with your cum” he gripped on your waist tightly, his thrusts getting sloppier. “s-shit, baby,” moans emitted from both of your mouths as you both came, feeling his warm seeds inside you.

hyunjae pulled out of you, watching as some of his cum dripped from your swollen lips, his cock hardening again at the sight.

“wanna go take a shower for a second round?”