#terrors.answered

[these-terrors]

3, 4, and 14 for the horrible asks:)

hey i only saw this now but i found the horrible asks thingie so i'll answer them rn. sorry for the delay!! 03: Do you regret anything? i tend to say i don't really have any regrets in general because i try to live in line with myself and to understand that the choices i once made were made in good faith in relation to myself and the way i wanted things to turn out back then. i do regret not setting boundaries from earlier in life and not talking back to a lot of people who would've deserved it but to whom i was way too nice at the time. ig this is what being a people pleaser well into your teens is like aough. also i genuinely truly sincerely regret not cheating on the ex that assaulted me, wish i could traumatize him back (for legal reasons this is a joke). and when things get bad in my head i also regret not becoming a better person sooner because the people i love deserve that, but they do remind me that progress matters a lot and that they weren't perfect either, which helps :) 04: Are you insecure? i think i am, yeah. i don't really think about it often, because i usually associate being insecure with being insecure about physical features, but i think i kinda got over most of those, at least when it comes to existing next to others. i still get insecure about my double chin when with a partner but i ask for reassurance and it's usually fine. moving on from the physical aspect, i am insecure about my personality. it got way better in the last 4 years, but god do i sometimes fear the mess that i am and how that reflects onto my relationships. gosh. 14: Do you miss someone?

thing is that i don't miss the actual people, but the people they could've been if they tried more and cared more. i think everyone that left my life did so for a reason and for the better. i'm usually better off without the people that had to leave and i pretty much always end up glad that they left. i miss the versions of them that they embodied back when we were going through the good times and the really tight times of our friendship, but not the actual real them. the cub who broke my heart wasn't even the way i saw him for example, i gave him way too much credit when he was just emotionally unavailable and pretty much a man child. learned my lesson, not missing him anymore, just missing the good times. but now, thankfully, i'm aware i can have even better times with people who are actually good people. gosh this got lengthy and personal. hope it was interesting to read thumbs up emoji

[these-terrors]

ur so cool

wtf thank u that s so sweet :((