cupcek · 4 months ago
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۫⁎ . 👞⁺ ˳ ۫⁎ . ♫⁺ ˳ ۫⁎ . 🎬⁺ ˳
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mymoodwriting · 4 months ago
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16.3k, yandere, sirens, minor hydrophobia, sleep walking, lucid dreaming, potential drowning, trauma, drugs, manipulation, kidnapping, smut, aphrodisiac, monster fucking, monster cock, fingering, penetration, female penetration, french kissing, pussy licking, cream pie, implied gang bang (@starillusion13)
“This trip is gonna be awesome!”
Your friends had always told you to visit the Fairy Tale Waterfall, since it was a big tourist attraction, and something you had to do at least once in your life. You agreed, it was an incredible place, but you definitely didn’t have the heart to tell them you had already been there once, and weren’t really eager to go back. You had gone with another friend group back then and over the last year had drifted apart. You didn’t want to disappoint your new friends and make them feel bad if you were left out, so you packed a bag and went out with them.
You arrived at the waterfall early in the morning, the sunlight shining down on the water, making it sparkle. This place was really beautiful, you couldn’t deny that. Although you felt this nervousness in the back of your head as you stared at the water. You knew how to swim, and you still did so at pools and the beach, but this waterfall, you weren’t so sure you wanted to get in the water at all. You put that to the side and helped your friends set up the tents. You focused on that even as some of the others went for a swim, saying you wanted to make sure everything was set up before nightfall.
When you had mostly finished up you took a little break, sitting down in the shade of a tree, staring out at your friends. They were having so much fun, and their smiles brought one to your face. This really was an amazing place and you were glad to be here, but the memories of the past continued to haunt you. This whole scene before you actually felt like deja vu, especially when your friends noticed you and began gesturing for you to join them. You shook your head and pointed towards your campsite, telling them you weren’t done. They let it go for now, but you began to worry. It might not have been a good idea to come at all. As you continued to watch them you could help but think back to the last time you had been here.
🖤
“Y/n! Get up and get in the water!”
You opened your eyes to the sound of your friends calling for you. A groan escaped your lips, followed by a smile. You took a moment and then dressed yourself before stepping out of the tent. The warm sun shined down on you, and after a moment your eyes adjusted. You saw your friends out at the water, seeing them waving and gesturing for you to come over. You walked towards the shoreline, but yelped when you felt the water.
“It’s so cold!”
“Just get in!” Jemma shouted. “You’ll warm up to it.”
You laughed and walked into the water, shivering a bit but smiling all the way. Your friends cheered as you wadded over to them.
“Y/N!”
You heard a splashing sound, hearing a familiar voice call your name. You stopped and turned around, seeing your friend, Ally, frantically making their way over to you. It was an odd sight especially when you had seen Ally with your group of friends that had called you out. Something was off, and it was starting to freak you out. As Ally approached you stepped back, panicking. You wound up slipping and going under. When you resurfaced everything had changed. Day had turned to night and you felt a greater chill in the water. While you looked around confused and disoriented Ally caught up to you.
“Y/n, what the hell are you doing?”
“Huh?”
Ally could tell you weren’t in your right mind, so she helped you out of the water and onto dry land. She told you to stay put and not move a muscle while she went to get you a towel. She helped you dry off, bringing you over to a fire to help warm you up.
“Wa… what happened?”
“You don’t remember?”
“I… I don’t know…”
“Girl, I woke up to get a drink and I see you walking out into the water. You scared me, were you sleepwalking or something?”
“I… I guess… I thought… you guys were out there… and it was morning…”
“Talk about a vivid dream. Let’s properly dry you up and change your clothes.”
You got up and went with Ally, cleaning up and getting into dry clothes. You couldn’t really go back to sleep, but come morning you packed up, Ally and your friends thinking it best to leave after such an experience, and you weren’t going to argue with them. As everyone finished packing you stared out into the water. Something strange happened to you, but you couldn’t quite understand it, nor did you want to. You thought you’d never come back, but it seemed that fate had something else in mind.
🖤
As the sun went down you helped prepare dinner, coming along with some of the guys, the smell of meat in the air. For everyone’s safety you had agreed on no alcohol, but you had plenty of other refreshments for the trip. You played some games to determine tent-mates and then everyone slowly started turning in for the night. You were one of the last to go to bed, staying up to admire the stars and the calmness of the water. Although after a while a bit of uneasiness settled in and you figured it was best to go to bed. For your own sake you set up a little trip wire with a bell on it outside your tent, just in case something happened again. You hoped that wouldn’t be the case, but at least you found it easier to fall asleep.
Come morning you woke to the smell of breakfast, hearing your friends outside. You made your way out, startling yourself when you tripped over a wire, a bell snapping you awake. You tumbled to the ground panting, sound hearing some chuckles, and then a hand came into view. Your tent-mate, Misu, helped you back onto your feet, commenting on your little contraption. She noticed right away when she got up and was careful not to trip it so you could sleep in. She didn’t think you would fall for it yourself, but one could be very groggy in the morning. Things were left like that and you joined the others for breakfast. Although today you probably couldn’t avoid going into the water, and it made you a bit nervous.
“Y/n, look over there.”
Avary pointed over to a group of boys near the water. It was so early in the morning but they were already going for a swim. You could feel the blood rush to your face as you noticed some of them weren’t wearing any shirts, and the others were in white t-shirts that were already soaked. You had never seen such a thing before, and you couldn’t stop staring.
“This is exactly why we came to the waterfall.” Misu commented. “The boys. We should say hi, maybe go for a swim together.”
“I… I don’t know… I… we can’t bother them…”
“Y/n, if they were just here to swim then they wouldn’t be doing all that.”
“I… I guess…”
Misu had a point. The boys weren’t just swimming around, but being very playful with each other, and being quite loud. At this point they were surely attracting everyone’s attention. Maybe this could work in your favor. You were already too nervous to enter the water, and you could use the pretty boys as another reason not to go. You’d surely embarrass yourself if you got near them anyway. Yet, you couldn’t help but stare, something about them drawing your gaze. You only broke away when your friends called to you.
After breakfast you helped clean up, your other friends going off to swim and make conversation with those boys. They’d be distracted trying to make nice with them, so you trusted they wouldn’t be bothering you about getting into the water. You were right about that, even as you kept catching yourself staring at them. You didn’t know what it was about them that kept getting your attention, but you tried not to keep staring. After the fifth time you told yourself you needed to have the waterfall out of your line of sight, so you went to your tent. Since it had always been your plan to stay out of the water you brought a book with you to keep you busy.
You laid down to read it, having a mini fan in the tent to keep you cool. You got engrossed in your book until you heard a bell that startled you. A scream escaped your lips and you quickly turned around, seeing a stranger poke their head into your tent. You screamed again and they quickly apologized, stepping out. Once you had regained your breath you carefully crawled over to the entrance of your tent, looking out at the boy who had startled you. He had a nervous smile on his face, waving at you and apologizing once more. Now that you got a good look at him you realized he was one of the boys you had been staring at earlier. You immediately retreated back into your tent, feeling your face heating up again.
“Excuse me…” The boy peeked down into the tent. “Are you alright?”
“Uh… fine… uh… can I help you?”
“Could you come out of the tent?”
“… why…”
“Well, it’s difficult to talk this way.”
“…”
“I won’t bite.”
“… what do you want…?”
“To talk.”
“Why?”
“To be honest, I was curious about you. I saw you staring again and again, yet you didn’t go into the water. Are you afraid or something?”
“What’s it to you?”
“This is the Fairy Tale Waterfall, one of the most beautiful places there is, but you won’t get into the water. Why bother coming all the way here if you’re not gonna enjoy yourself to the fullest?”
“I’m perfectly fine where I am…”
“Are you though?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You know, I can teach you how to swim if you want to.”
“I know how.”
“Then why don’t you come out to play?”
“I’m good.”
“You’re very interesting.”
“Y/n!”
You heard the voice of your friend. You were glad not to be alone anymore, and this gave you the motivation to get out of the tent. You scrambled out and ignored the boy nearby, looking for your friend. When you tried to walk away your arm was grabbed and you were held back.
“Ya! Let go.”
“We weren’t done talking.”
“Y/n! Oh- I see you’ve met Juyeon.”
“Who?”
“I’m Juyeon.” The boy introduced himself. “Nice to meet you.”
“Can you let go of my arm now?”
“Ah, sorry.”
Juyeon had quickly changed demeanors when your friend showed up. He was no longer giving creepy vibes, but had a big friendly smile on his face.
“My brothers and I were talking with your friends.” Juyeon explained. “And they mentioned that someone from their group was missing. I thought to come over and get you myself. We don’t want you missing out on the fun.”
“I’m alright, thanks.”
“Come on, y/n. You didn’t get a chance to get in the water at all yesterday, you have to get in today.”
“It’s okay, Mina. Besides, I was about to start preparations for lunch, I’ll call you all when it’s ready.”
“My brothers can prepare lunch for all of us.” Juyeon suggested. “That way you’re free to come and swim with us.”
“Uh…”
“That sounds perfect!” Mina cheered. “Let’s go!”
Before you could say more Mina grabbed your hand and pulled you along towards the water. She caught you off guard so you stumbled behind her, trying to protest. Even as you spoke your eyes were fixated on the water that was fast approaching. Your words were failing you, but just as you got close to the water’s edge you screamed.
“Stop!”
Mina abruptly let you go and stepped back. You slowly settled your breathing, moving away from the water, keeping your arms close to your chest.
“Y/n… are you okay…?”
“… yeah… I’m fine… I just…”
“Y/n…”
“Close your eyes and take a deep breath.” Juyeon took your hands in his and turned your back to the water. “Just breathe, okay?”
Even though you were creeped out by Juyeon earlier it didn’t matter at that moment. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, trying to calm your breathing. Juyeon gestured for your friend to go, keeping you company while you regained your composure.
“Just focus on my voice and breathe. Everything’s going to be okay.”
“… sorry…”
“What are you apologizing for? You didn’t do anything wrong. Just breathe, you’re okay.”
Once you had steadied your breathing you opened your eyes, seeing the worry on Juyeon’s face. He quickly hid it behind a soft smile, giving you some reassurance.
“Hey, you okay?”
“I’m fine…”
“We should go back to the tent, right?”
“Yeah…”
“Alright. Let’s go, one foot after the other, I got you.”
Juyeon stayed at your side while you made your way back to your tent. Your legs were a bit wobbly, but he made sure you didn’t fall. He helped you get back into your tent, not wanting you out in the sun, and disappeared for a moment to get you some water. You took the bottle and he figured that was an invitation to join you. It wasn’t, but you didn’t have the energy to tell him otherwise. Juyeon sat down next to you, pulling his knees up to his chest. He watched you quietly for a moment.
“What happened?”
“Huh?”
“What happened to you that you’d react like that?”
“Why do you care?”
“Well, what am I supposed to tell the others? Everyone saw…”
“Ugh, I never should have come back here in the first place.”
“How about this, you tell me what happened to you a year ago, and I make sure no one mentions this little incident. Deal?”
“As if you could do that.”
“You’d be surprised.”
You stared at Juyeon, but he kept that friendly smile on his face. You had never really told anyone about what happened, and those that had been present back then were no longer in your friends circle. Maybe you did need to talk about it, and a stranger was less likely to judge.
“I won’t tell anyone.”
You sighed. “It’s silly.”
“I doubt that considering the way you reacted.”
“Last time I was here… I wound up sleepwalking into the water… it was the middle of the night, but for some reason I thought it was morning… my friend saw me and went after me… in my disoriented state I slipped under the water and panic took hold… I nearly drowned… I would have drowned if not for her…”
“And is that friend here with you?”
“No… we lost touch afterwards… my current friends don’t know about this… I didn’t want to tell them so I agreed to come along, but it was a bad idea… I couldn’t just avoid the water the whole time I’m here… I’m so stupid!”
“No, you’re not. You didn’t want to upset anyone so you came along. I think it’s great you came back here.”
“I don’t think it is.”
“From what I can tell, you’re not afraid of drowning, you know how to swim, what you’re afraid of is the waterfall.”
“That sounds crazy.”
“Is it though? The soothing sound of the calm water probably enticed you and caused you to sleepwalk. That’s understandable.”
“Why are you being so nice?”
“Can’t I? This place is amazing, I love it here, and the last thing I want is for someone to be afraid. Tell you what, how about I help you?”
“With what?”
“This, to overcome your fear so you don’t have to feel silly anymore. Not that it is silly.”
“And why would you help me?”
“Don’t you wanna have fun with all your friends and play in the waterfall? You had fun last time with your friends, so much so that you got into the water without hesitation when you thought they were calling for you. There’s nothing to be scared of. I promise.”
“… what are you gonna tell the others?”
“That you were startled and not ready to go into the water. No one’s gonna bring it up, I swear. So how about we go prepare lunch?”
“… sure… I can help…”
“Awesome.”
Juyeon got out of the tent, careful not to trip over the bells again, and waited for you. It took you a moment but you got out, taking the hand that was offered to you. Juyeon led you over to his camp area, not letting go of your hand the entire way. A few other of his brothers had already started preparing, and welcomed you as you arrived.
“These are my brothers Sangyeon, Jacob, and Younghoon.”
“It’s nice to meet you.” Jacob commented. “Hear a lot about you.”
“Really…?”
“Yeah, your friends kept talking about you. Nothing but good things I promise.”
“Right… so what can I help with?”
“How about you wash some vegetables for us.”
“I can do that.”
You helped the boys with lunch preparations, loving the smell in the air. There were plenty of picnic tables in the area, so the boys brought a few together so you could all eat together. Once the food was ready the others were called over and everyone gathered to eat. That’s when you were properly introduced to the rest of Juyeon’s brothers. There wasn’t much of a family resemblance, but from the way they treated each other it was easy to tell they were very close. You on the other hand were a bit nervous, expecting some questions and concerns about the earlier incident, but there were none. Everything seemed normal, as if you didn’t have an outburst at all. You weren’t entirely sure if you should be grateful over such a thing, cause it was kinda strange, but for the moment you could at least enjoy your time with your friends.
“Hey, come with me.”
Hyunjae took your hand and led you away from the others. You thought maybe you’d go back to your camp, but he began making his way towards the water. You stopped, but his pull was far stronger than you anticipated.
“Hyunjae…”
“I know, we’re not getting into the water, I swear, but I wanted to try something.”
“What do you mean?”
“Trust me.”
You probably shouldn’t, but something about his words felt reassuring, so you followed. As he promised, you only came to the edge of the water. Hyunjae sat down and pulled you down with him. Your feet were inches from the water, but you weren’t all that nervous.
“Nothing much can happen at this depth, so there’s nothing to fear. How about we just dip our feet in?”
“… how… who…”
“Maybe I overheard you talking before… but anyway, let’s do this. Nothing like literally getting your feet wet to help you overcome your worries.”
Hyunjae put his feet in the water and gestured for you to do the same. In this situation you could see how your fear would be silly. You were just putting your feet in, and you were mostly on land, so there was no real danger. You took a breath and slowly dipped your feet into the water. The cool sensation was welcomed, and a little smile appeared on your face.
“Good job.” Hyunjae cheered. “See, everything’s okay.”
“Yeah…”
“I’m right here, keeping an eye on you, nothing bad is gonna happen.”
“You can stop, you’re making it sound like I’m a child.”
“Alright, I’ll back off.”
You moved your feet around in the water, feeling a bit childish with your actions. Your gaze was on the water around your limbs. It was clean and beautiful, not at all like it could swallow you whole. When you heard a splash you looked over, seeing Sunwoo swimming towards you. The water was pretty shallow over by you, so he began crawling to get close.
“Look at you, enjoying the waterfall?”
“A bit…”
“That’s good. Why not come in for a swim? I’ll be right with you.”
“I’m okay…”
“Baby steps.” Hyunjae stated. “Little by little. Besides, you shouldn’t be in the water either, Sunwoo, you just ate.”
“I’ll be fine.”
Sunwoo splashed some water up your legs, getting a bit on your shirt. It was refreshing, and you couldn’t help but laugh. You remembered doing all this back then with your friends, deep into the waters of the waterfall without a care in the world. You didn’t want to be scared of such a wonderful place. You stood up and both boys looked at you curiously. You took a shaky step forward, going just a bit deeper into the water. Sunwoo backed away whereas Hyunjae got up and grabbed your arm.
“Woah, we don’t need to do anything drastic today.”
“I can… I can go further…”
“Don’t push yourself.”
“I know… this… this is real… I’m not dreaming… right…? Pinch me.”
“What?”
Sunwoo splashed some water in your face, getting you pretty soaked. You were stunned and wiped your face off before glaring down at Sunwoo.
“What was that for?”
“Splashing water in your face is usually a good way to wake up.”
“I said pinch me.”
“I can do that too.”
Of course Sunwoo didn’t miss the chance to move over to your leg and give you a little pinch. You yelped and jumped back a step.
“So, are you awake?”
“I guess I am.”
“Good. Let’s go waist deep.”
“No, no, no.” Hyunjae mentioned. “You also just ate, you shouldn’t be going into the water.”
“Just a bit more.”
You continued moving forward, even if it was like half a step at a time. Sunwoo was encouraging and cheering, while Hyunjae was worried and right at your side. With every step you thought about what Juyeon had said. You weren’t afraid of drowning, but of the waterfall itself. If you just showed yourself that there was nothing to fear, that it was just one bad experience, then you’d be able to enjoy this place just as you once did. The water got up above your knees when you had a bit of a slip. Hyunjae caught you and Sunwoo got up from the water to make sure you were okay.
“I think that’s good for today.” Hyunjae commented. “Let’s get back to land.”
“Yeah, I’d like that.”
You got back on shore, and the two took you to your tent, helping you dry off. You definitely needed a change of clothes, so you went off to do that. When you got back the two were still waiting for you.
“Since you’re not gonna swim, what are you gonna do for the afternoon?” Sunwoo asked.
“I have a book with me. So just some relaxing in the shade.”
“Why don’t you come over to our campsite, we have some games and we could keep you company.”
“I wouldn’t want to keep you from your brothers.”
“We come here all the time. So we won’t be missing out on much.”
“You should join us.” Hyunjae said. “You’ll love it.”
“Alright.”
You spent your afternoon with some of the boys in their campsite, playing games and munching on snacks. It was nice, and you felt less bad about not being in the water. Later in the day you helped with dinner, and prepared some sausages and marshmallows for the campfire. Despite what had happened earlier you quite enjoyed your day and were happy to make some new friends. You stayed up a little late roasting marshmallows to make smores while sharing campfire stories. Nothing too spooky, so when you did finally sleep you didn’t have any nightmares. Come morning you were actually looking forward to the day.
After breakfast your friends mentioned they wanted to take a little hike to one of the other pools by the waterfall. You weren’t really one for hiking, but before you could give an answer Chanhee had come over to your camp, asking if anyone wanted to go for a swim. Your friends obviously already had plans, but at least now you had an alternative than to just staying behind. They didn’t seem to mind, and Misu gave you a knowing look telling you to have fun. Once they had gone you went with Chanhee to his campsite, greeting the others. They were happy to see you, and all eager for you to get in the water. Perhaps Juyeon had talked, but you didn’t care to scold him now.
Chanhee and Changmin were the two that took you over to the main pool. Not many others were around, so you’d have the place mostly to yourselves. The first to get into the water was Chanhee, diving under and getting himself completely soaked. He had a bright smile on his face, gesturing for you to join him. As you stared out into the water you felt nervous, but it was minor compared to the other day. You could stand at the edge of the water without being afraid. After a moment you took a deep breath and took a small step forward, feeling the water along your toes. You moved slowly, Changmin right at your side to make sure you were alright.
Although you only got a few inches in before Eric jumped into the water near you. He startled you a bit, causing Changmin to grab your arm and waist. You hadn’t really lost his footing, but his touch assured you that you weren’t alone. Although a moment later you were suddenly soaked as Eric was splashing water in your direction. You couldn’t help but laugh, trying to shield your face before Changmin moved you behind him. The other two began scolding the maknae but you were just curious as to why he had done this.
“What? Sunwoo said it was best to get her all wet so she’d know she’s awake, and pinch her too.”
“We’re not doing that.” Chanhee stated. “So don’t even think about it.”
“He said it was important.”
“It’s alright.”
Eric smiled and stuck his tongue out, going over to you and pinching your arm. You groaned but you grinned through the whole ordeal.
“Wide awake.”
“I am.”
“Good. Now we can continue with the important things.” Changmin said. “Shall we?”
“Yeah, baby steps.”
You continued where you left off, soon enough having water above your knees. It was as far as you had made it yesterday, and the goal was to go further. The water was a bit chilly but you were getting used to it. As you walked you kept your arms up, Changmin right behind you ready to grab you at any point. Meanwhile Chanhee stayed in front of you like a guide. You moved slowly, taking every step with caution and making sure you had your footing. Before you knew it the water was slightly above your waist. Now your nerves were starting to show.
“We can stop here.” Chanhee suggested. “You made good progress.”
“I… I can keep going…”
“You don’t have to.”
“I can… I know how to swim… I won’t drown…”
“We’re right here.” Changmin assured. “You can do this.”
You kept going as you had been, careful with every step. The two cheered you on and encouraged you. It wasn’t long before the water was at your breasts. You started laughing, a bit of nerves and joy mixed together. This wasn’t scary. You weren’t alone and the water around you was calm. Perhaps it was all that which caused you to lose focus. You took one wrong step and slipped into the water. You weren’t under for long but that was enough to trigger you and throw you into a panic.
“Y/n.”
The darkness you were met with when you went under put you back in the mindset of that day. Your vision was blurred and you were frantically reaching out for anything to hold onto. Before panic could truly settle in and take hold you felt someone lift you up. Next thing you knew you were sitting on Changmin’s shoulders, grabbing his face for stability. You were gasping for breath, shaking water out of your face.
“Easy, easy.” Chanhee grabbed your hand, trying to get your attention. “Deep breaths, deep breaths. That’s it, just breathe.”
“… what… what happened…?”
“You just slipped, but you’re okay.”
“… I’m okay…”
“Yeah, yeah, let’s get you back to land.”
Chanhee kept a hold of your hand and Changmin moved slowly, getting you back to shore. You only took a few steps away from the water before collapsing to catch your breath. The two boys came to your side, keeping an eye on you as you recovered. A few of the others came rushing over to check on you.
“She’s alright.” Changmin assured. “Perfectly fine.”
“Good. We should probably dry you off.” Sangyeon held his hand out to you. “Come on.”
You accepted his hand and got to your feet. He kept you close, at his side, as you walked back to camp. As soon as you were there Jacob came over to wrap you in a towel, doing his best to warm you up.
“I’ll get you some cocoa.”
The boys had you sit by the fire, getting you another towel. Haknyeon was working on drying up your hair, being gentle, and keeping conversation.
“When did you learn to swim?”
“Uh… when I was like five…”
“Do you like it? Swimming that is.”
“Yeah. The cool water, moving in a way that feels like floating, it’s great.”
“You must have enjoyed swimming at the waterfall last year. Unlike pools, here the water is constantly moving on its own, adding to the experience.”
“Yeah…”
“You did really well today.”
“I still messed up…”
“You did no such thing. Most people would never come back here, let alone get in the water again after such an experience, but look at you. You’re quite brave don’t you think.”
“I guess…”
You had both hands on the mug of cocoa, using it to warm up. It really wasn’t that cold out, but right now you just wanted to get dry. You had lunch and stayed at the camp to play games again. No one else really brought up what happened in the morning and just focused on the present. You helped with dinner and afterwards found yourself rather tired. You wanted to wait for your friends to return, but sleep was calling to you.
“Maybe you should get to bed.”
“I’m gonna stay up and wait.”
“I don’t think you can.” Kevin chuckled. “Why don’t you go take a nap in one of our tents. We’ll wake you when your friends get back.”
“Sure…”
You couldn’t argue, well, you didn’t want to. A nap sounded like a good idea. One of the others went to get your sleeping bag and had it set down in one of their tents. None of them would be sneaking in later, so you could rest easy. It honestly wasn’t difficult to slip away into dreamland either.
🖤
“Rise and shine.”
You woke to the sounds of someone unzipping the entrance of the tent, peeking over with blurry vision to see Younghoon smiling and waving at you.
“Morning.”
“Morning? You were supposed to wake me when my friends got back.”
“Yeah, but they got back pretty late and didn’t want to wake you. Besides, it seems like you were sleeping happily.”
“Sorry. I’ll head out right now.”
“It’s okay. Let’s have breakfast first.”
Younghoon held his hand out to you, which you took after rubbing the sleep from your eyes. Everyone greeted you, and this time no one let you help with breakfast preparations. The rest of your friends came over to eat, talking about their hike and how much fun they had. You were glad to hear their stories, not speaking about your own activities from the previous day. After eating and waiting for the food to go down many went back out into the waterfall. You thought about yesterday. Even though it ended badly you had made great progress. You needed a different approach this time, and you knew exactly what to do.
“Where are you going?” Sangyeon asked. “Especially by yourself.”
“I’m gonna go swim.”
“What?” 
“I got pretty far into the water, but I keep walking and that’s my problem. The water is deep, if I keep walking I won’t make much progress. I need to swim in the water, that’s how I get my confidence back.”
“Okay, but you’re not going out alone.”
“I’d hope not.”
Sangyeon went with you to the waterfall, finding a place that was mostly empty. He got into the water first, diving down and getting completely soaked. You felt your face getting a bit red, seeing as he was shirtless and now completely soaking wet.
“You coming?”
“Yeah, yeah.”
You slowly walked towards the water, but stopped at the edge. You had to mentally prepare yourself, but you were still nervous.
“I’ll go with you.”
Jacob suddenly appeared at your side, giving you a reassuring smile. He took your hand and the two of you walked into the water. You shivered from the cold water, letting out a yell.
“I guess the morning sunlight hasn’t warmed it up.” Jacob teased. “Shall we check to see if you’re awake?”
You nodded which prompted Sangyeon to splash water in your face. It was still cold, but nothing changed, it was still bright and early. Jacob gave you a little pinch, making you jump ever so slightly going further into the water.
“Shall we continue?”
“Yeah.”
You took a few more steps into the water, getting up to your waist. You stopped and slowly lowered yourself further in, getting the water up to your neck. You moved your arms around, trying to get a good feel for the water. The area around you was clear, so there wouldn’t be anything in your way. You mentally counted to three and then dove down into the water, swimming a little bit before surfacing. The sun was still out, Jacob and Sangyeon in your view, big smiles on their faces.
“I did it.”
“Yeah you did!”
Such joy surged through you, and your fears began to wash away. You were happy to be able to swim in the waterfall again, assured that you were awake and with good company. You swam around with Sangyeon and Jacob, some of the others coming over as well.
“Can I show you something?” Sangyeon asked.
“Sure.”
“Follow me.”
Sangyeon led the way over to the waterfall, helping you get out of the water and carefully moving along the rocks. Next thing you knew you were behind the waterfall in what looked like a cave entrance. You sat down by the edge, watching the backside of the waterfall, taking in the beautiful sounds and scenery.
“I didn’t know you could get back here.”
“It’s a bit risky, but worth it.”
“I agree.”
“I have something for you.”
“Hm?”
Sangyeon grabbed a plastic bag out of his swimtruck, revealing these transparent spheres. He pulled one out and popped it in his mouth, holding the bag out to you.
“These are gummies, mystery flavor. It’s my favorite so I thought you’d like some.”
“Thanks.”
You grabbed a gummy from the bag, curious as to what they were since you had never seen them before. They were very squishy and then you put it in your mouth. You chewed on it while focusing on the taste to figure out what flavor it was.
“Hm… I’m thinking peach.”
“Mine tastes like strawberry.”
“Nice. Where did you get these anyway?”
“That’s a secret.”
“Come on.”
“Not telling.”
“Why? I-”
Your words were cut short as you felt your throat drying up. You thought maybe something was stuck as it became difficult to breathe but you didn’t feel anything. You clawed at your neck, trying to find some sort of explanation. You looked to Sangyeon in fear, but he didn’t seem at all concerned. He popped another gummy into his mouth and then grabbed you. The two of you fell into the water together. You thought panic would overtake you, but for some reason you felt fine. You quickly surfaced and stayed a float, suddenly able to breathe again.
“What… what just happened…?”
“It’s temporary, just to get you home.”
“What?”
“You’ll see.”
Sangyeon pulled you back under water, scaring you and causing you to flail around. He held you tight though, and pulled you close, surprising you with a kiss. His lips pressed firmly against yours, and you began feeling dizzy. The more you tried to push him away the less strength you had. The edges of your vision began to go black, and it wasn’t long before darkness swallowed you whole.
🖤
You gasped awake and began coughing up some water. As you began to regain your senses you looked around. There was a large pool of water before you, and there seemed to be rocks all around. You were in some sort of cave. A bit of sunlight came into the room from an opening in the ceiling, but there seemed to be nowhere else to go. You were trapped here. Now you were starting to wonder how you even got there and how you would escape. You got up on shaky legs and looked around for some type of opening you could reach.
“You’re awake.”
You jumped and looked around for the voice, then you saw Juyeon in the water, waving at you. For a moment you thought you were imagining things, but he swam closer, and that’s when you got a real good look at him. His eyes had become slits, like a cat, and were a golden color. A few bluegreen scales decorated his cheeks and ran along his arms. His fingers were webbed together, also showing claws instead of nails. A few fins seemed to poke out of his arms, and even his ears had changed to look more aquatic. Seeing all this causes you to stumble back and fall. Juyeon remained in the water though, chuckling over your actions.
“You’re very cute.”
“Wa… what are you…?”
“Isn’t it obvious?”
“A fish?”
“Okay, that’s just rude.”
“Where am I!? Why did you bring me here!?”
“Easy. We’re not gonna hurt you. We just brought you here while we got everything ready. We’ll leave soon.”
“To where?”
“Home.”
“Home?”
“Yeah. We were gonna bring you a year ago, but your stupid friend took you from us before we got to meet. Kinda wish they were here with you, I wanted to give them a piece of my mind.”
Juyeon growled and revealed sharp teeth, making you scream. You scrambled back and as far away from the water as possible. You had your back pressed against the wall, mumbling to yourself that this was all just a dream.
“You’re not dreaming, and before you get any ideas, there is no way out of this place. Well, not for humans. The only way in and out is through some underwater caves, but you’d need diving gear to go to and from, which you don’t have.”
“How… how did you bring me here?”
“Sangyeon gave you something that would let you breathe underwater for a while. Long enough to get here.”
“The gummies…”
“Yeah those things, I don’t know where he gets them.”
“Just let me go, please.”
“Nope. You got away from us once, and it’s not gonna happen again.”
“Please. I won’t tell anyone anything. I’ll never come back and-”
“We don’t want that.” Juyeon got out of the water, revealing more scales and fins. “You disappearing again is the last thing we want.”
You swallowed nervously. “My… my friends… they’ll look for me…”
“And they’re never gonna find you. No one will.”
“Please…”
You felt tears sting your eyes and start sliding down your cheeks. You closed your eyes and went back to mumbling about how this was all a bad dream and you’d wake up soon. You felt Juyeon approach, but you kept your eyes shut tight. Then you felt a hand on your chin.
“Look at me.”
Juyeon’s voice was so calm and soothing. Despite your fears you began to relax. You slowly opened your eyes, seeing that Juyeon had returned to normal. He had a soft smile on his face, seeming far friendlier than before.
“Just listen to my voice. Everything’s going to be okay. You can go back to sleep, and when you wake up, you’ll be home.”
“… home…”
“You’ll love it.”
Your eyelids felt heavy, and this sudden exhaustion was beginning to take hold. You wanted Juyeon to let you go, but you didn’t have the strength to lift your arm. He kept coaxing you to sleep, and you couldn’t resist for long. Soon returning to that void.
🖤
Once again you woke with a sharp intake of breath, followed by coughing up some water. You recovered quicklier than before. This time you discovered you were no longer in a cave, but what seemed to be some sort of cabin. The walls showed logs, and you were laying in bed. The room itself was mostly empty besides the basic furniture. You slowly got out of bed, avoiding the water you had coughed up. You made it to the door and carefully tried the knob, relieved to find the door unlocked. You carefully opened it and peeked your head out of the room. The halls were empty and quiet. You quickly decided which way to go and quietly snuck out of the room. All you needed was an exit.
You walked down the hall trying to make as little noise as possible. It seemed that no one else was in the cabin, and then you came into what appeared to be the living room. The TV was on, but no one was on the sofas watching. You noticed trees out the window, and another body of water, but you didn’t care for it. There was a door that you figured led out, but taking the front door might not bed a good idea. You noticed another way leading to the kitchen and you figured that could lead you to the back. You moved quickly and made sure no one could see you from the windows. The kitchen was clean and empty, and there was your back door.
You ran over, happy to find it unlocked and you stepped out. The fresh air was so nice, and it seemed that no one was around. Now was your chance, you made it to the trees, being quiet and once there was some distance from you and the cabin you began to run. Surely you’d find a trail or some other signs of civilization soon, but you just needed to get away from the cabin and the others. You ran until you needed to catch your breath, looking around for any possible clues as to where you could go. All you could really see were trees, which wasn’t much help, but at least you had gotten away.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
You screamed and looked back, seeing Hyunjae and Chanhee standing a few feet away from you. Your first instinct was to run, but you immediately tripped on an exposed root and collapsed to the ground. You scraped your knee and screamed again. The two boys came to your side, helping you to your feet. You wouldn’t be running anymore with that injury, and the two took you back to the cabin. Despite running for so long and getting so far, in a few seconds you were back at the cabin, as if you had never gone anywhere in the first place. Even though you were injured you yelled and tried to free yourself, but the boys held you tightly.
“We are trying to help.” Chanhee hissed. “You’re injured.”
“Let me go! This is kidnapping!?”
“It’s not. More like claiming ownership.”
“What?!” 
They brought you over to the edge of the dock, having you sit with your legs hanging over the edge, your toes just above the water.. You saw movement in the water and started freaking out, but you couldn’t go anywhere. Moments later Eric popped his head out of the water. He looked similar to Juyeon in his fish form, and that scared you all the more. You tried to pull your legs up but Eric grabbed your injured one, making you freeze. You could feel the tips of his claw pressing gently at your skin. You whimpered and Eric met your eyes.
“I’m not gonna hurt you.”
“What are you?”
“A friend.”
Eric cupped some water in his hand and splashed your wound, cleaning it a bit. Then he pulled your leg closer and kissed your wound. You yelped, but he just chuckled and disappeared into the water. You were confused but then your leg began to feel better, and you noticed your wound was healing. In a matter of seconds your leg was healed, as if nothing had ever happened.
“… how…?”
“Come on, let’s get you back inside.”
The two picked you up and took you back into the cabin. That’s when you noticed there were multiple cabins around, giving the impression this was some other camp. Although there was a waterfall as well that led into the lake the camp surrounded. You were still too shocked to voice any of your questions, so you were easily dragged back inside. The boys plopped you down on the couch, giving you the TV remote.
“We’ll be right back, and don’t go anywhere this time.”
You put the remote down and examined your leg, seeing for sure that there was no cut. You couldn’t believe it, you couldn’t believe any of this actually. You thought back to how you wound up here, remembering you went for a swim with Sangyeon, and then wound up in a cave, and now you were here. You looked out the window, seeing the sun. It was barely reaching its peak, meaning it was morning. It was hard to believe a whole day had gone by since you were last at the waterfall with your friends. They must be panicking and looking for you like crazy. Since you were alone you got up and looked around for a phone or something you could use to contact them. You found nothing, figuring they were probably hiding any means of outside contact.
“I’m pretty sure you were told to stay put.”
Younghoon offered you a smile, leaning against the entryway to the living room. You gave him a shy one in return, feeling like you were caught doing something bad when in reality you hadn’t done anything.
“Relax. Sangyeon wants to talk with you. Follow me.”
It wasn’t a request, but an order. After a moment you followed Younghoon, going up to the second floor and down the hall to the door at the end. He knocked and then gestured for you to go inside. You were kind of nervous, but it wasn’t like you could run away again. You shakily reached for the doorknob and turned it, making your way inside. You walked into what appeared to be a study, seeing bookshelves on the wall and a desk at the center. That’s where Sangyeon sat, staring at his computer and typing. He stopped when you entered, the door closing behind you, and glanced over at you.
“Sit.”
“I could stand…”
“Sit down.”
“… okay…”
You sat down in front of his desk, keeping your legs close together and your hands in your lap. You didn’t dare to raise your gaze, feeling a scolding coming.
“Look at me.” You slowly lifted your gaze. “Good girl.”
“What do you want from me?”
“You.”
“Me?”
“It’s good to finally meet. I’ve gone through a lot of trouble to bring you here. So, let me lay down the rules.”
“Rules?”
“You can’t escape our little camp here. As you saw before, you can run for hours and days but you won’t go anywhere. Our home has magic surrounding its borders that prevent people from leaving or entering without our permission. You also won’t be able to contact anyone outside our home, signals come in, but can’t go out. If you try anything we’ll know.”
“What are you?”
“Hm?”
“You speak of magic like it’s normal, and however you brought me here… I don’t understand…”
“You haven’t figured that out yet?”
“Are you… fish people?”
“That’s insulting.” Sangyeon chuckled. “We’re sirens.”
“Sirens?”
“How do you think we brought you here? A sweet melody to lure you into the water and into our embrace.”
“It… it was you… I wasn’t sleep walking that day… you lulled me into the water… if it hadn’t been for my friend-”
“Quite unfortunate we missed you the first time. Which was all the more reason to be cautious the second time around. We were all so happy when you came back. So we had to make sure you didn’t escape us again. It was nice of your friends to go off and leave you with us.”
“Did… did they even come back…? They wouldn’t just leave me with strangers!?”
“Are you sure? It’s easy for us to put someone to sleep, and you’ve seen what else we can do.”
“You… my friends will look for me! They’d notice I was gone when they got back!”
“They won’t. Who do you think gave them the idea? We took all your things too darling. As far as they’ll remember, you never came with them.”
“… wa… what … why… why me! I didn’t do anything to you! I didn’t even see you at the waterfall a year ago!”
“But we saw you. My boys were very entranced by the beautiful girl playing with her friends. They wanted you for breeding season, and who am I to refuse them.”
“Bree… what did you say?”
Sangyeon chuckled. “I’m certain you heard me. We won’t hurt you, so rest assured you’ll be fine.”
“You’re insane…”
“The boys agreed not to touch you unless the time came. I’m quite curious who’ll break first.”
You were still trying to come to terms with what you had just been told, and make sense of it, but your brain did not want to process. Sangyeon got up from his desk and took your hand, giving you a proper tour of what he kept calling your home. The cabin you were in was the main house, and where your room was. Since it was the biggest, everyone used it as a communal space, although besides Sangyeon and Jacob, the others actually had their beds in the other cabins. The whole camp surrounded the waterfall and the lake it led into, which you had noticed was much bigger than the one you had been to before.
A few docks led into the water, and there seemed to be a little farm area where they grew fruits and vegetables. In all honesty this place looked so beautiful, but it was hard to take it all in when you knew this was your prison. You weren’t really paying attention to the tour, and next thing you knew you were back in the living room, alone. You grabbed the remote and turned off the TV, not wanting to be reminded of the outside world you could no longer get to. Now that you sat in silence you realized you didn’t like it, so you left the cabin. After a few steps you stopped and looked all around. There had to be some way out. From what you understood the surrounding forest wasn’t an option, so that left the water.
You thought back to how you supposedly wound up here, which would mean the water. Your eyes looked to the waterfall, and you remembered getting to the cave behind it back at the other place. There was surely one here too, and that could be your way out. You started to make your way towards the lake. Now that you knew what really had caused your previous fear, you had let it go, having other things to worry about. Although before you could jump into the water you were grabbed. Haknyeon offered you a smile, but you didn’t return it. You didn’t trust any of these guys, especially now that Sangyeon had told you why you were here.
“You wanna help with lunch?”
“No.”
“Come on, you helped before.”
“Yeah, before I knew you were a bunch of psychos!”
“Hey, we’re perfectly sane.”
“Is what an insane person would say.”
“Let’s just go, everyone is waiting for you.”
You didn’t have a choice as Haknyeon dragged you back over to the main cabin, and your strength was no match for his. You resigned yourself to being a complete klutz in the kitchen, and the second you got your hands on a knife you began swinging. Of course it was taken away from you immediately and you were removed from the kitchen.
“I get it, you’re upset.” Chanhee led you outside. “But I swear to you that you’ll like it here.”
“How would I ever like it? You kidnapped me and are holding me hostage!”
“That’s not true.”
“You used your stupid siren song thing to get me here, and I can’t leave, that’s kidnapping and being held against my will!”
“Okay, but this place is great. Your own paradise. It’s beautiful, and you have no job or responsibilities, you can do whatever you want here. And you’re not afraid of the water anymore, so you can swim to your heart’s content.”
“I want to go home.”
“Why? Back to school to work yourself to death for some corporation.”
“Being taken against your will isn’t exactly the best alternative, now is it?”
Chanhee scoffed. “You can fight with us all you want, but you’re gonna change your tune.”
“I won’t.”
“You will.”
It was obvious you didn’t want company, so Chanhee let you go off by yourself. He told you someone would come find you later when lunch was ready. You waited until he was gone before making your way back over to the docks. The water wasn’t super clear, so you couldn’t really make out how deep it was, but you figured it wouldn’t be bad. You sat at the edge of the dock and then let yourself drop over into the water. You didn’t touch the bottom, so you definitely didn’t go into the shallow part. You kept yourself afloat once you surfaced and figured which way the waterfall was. You began swimming towards it when you suddenly noticed something moving out in the water.
You came to a stop and looked out. As far as you were concerned there were no creatures in the lake, besides the boys themselves. From what you had heard before, all the boys would be gathering at the main cabin, so no one should be out in the water right now except for yourself. Still, you didn’t like this, so you decided to swim back. You got to the dock and pulled yourself out, although you suddenly felt something grab your leg. You screamed and managed to pull yourself free, looking back to see what had gotten you. Yellow slit eyes looked back at you from the edge of the dock. You couldn’t make out who it was until they got out of the water, crawling onto the dock towards you.
“Su… Sunwoo… what are you doing…? I… I thought you were with the others…”
“… pretty…”
You crawled back, nervous that any sudden movements would cause him to pounce on you. While you maintained eye contact you kept moving away, and he followed.
“Sunwoo…”
“… want…”
There was something different about his voice, and his gaze. He seemed more like a predator stalking his prey. A devilish smile adorned Sunwoo’s face, and it sent shivers down your spine. You were scared, and this little game would only last so long. All of a sudden Sunwoo made his move, lunging at you. Your scream did nothing to deter him, and even though you scrambled back he managed to grab onto your leg. In one swift motion he pulled you towards him, and you soon found yourself pinned under him.
“Sun… Sunwoo… let go…”
“… mine…”
Sunwoo buried his head in the crook of your neck, breathing you in, his wet lips against your skin. His arms began to move along your sides, and you realized the claws were gone. That didn’t change your current situation though. You began to squirm, trying to get him off, but he was wet, and kinda slimy. Not to mention he was much stronger than you. As hard as you tried, you couldn’t get him to budge. He began to pepper you with kisses, his legs pushing between yours. You kept fighting until you felt something poking at you down below. Your gaze slowly looked down to see a tent in Sunwoo’s shorts, starting to realize the inevitable.
“Sunwoo, get off!”
Your actions seemed to upset him as he growled and pinned your hands above your head. You stared up at him, seeing his eyes remained the slitted yellow color. He seemed to be reading your expression for a movement before he dove down for a kiss. It was rough, and since he caught you off guard it wasn’t difficult for him to get his tongue into your mouth. Even as you tried to fight him you realized there was a certain taste on his lips. Something sweet with a bit of a kick. Then for some reason you started kissing back, your head feeling fuzzy, followed by this warmth spreading down your body.
When he pulled away you were gasping for air, your vision a bit blurred, but the yellow of his eyes you could still make out. His hands trailed down your body once more, effortlessly ripping your shirt open. You felt hands grab at your breasts, followed by lips sucking on one of your nipples. You couldn’t help the moan that escaped you, this dizzy sensation messing with all your senses. You ran your fingers through his hair, trying to verbalize your thoughts, but it just came out as incoherent mumbles. A moment later Sunwoo’s hands were tugging down your shorts and panties. You tried to push your legs together, feeling a chill but he seemed to growl at that. He shoved your legs apart and moved down, burying his face into your center.
You yelled and grabbed fistfulls of his hair. You don’t know if you wanted him off or to go in deeper, but either way you felt something slimy between your folds, making you whimper and squirm. He didn’t tease you for long though, pulling away and climbing on top of you once again. You had no idea when he had gotten his shorts off, but now you felt something else poking at your entrance. In your state it was perfectly logical to reach down and feel this thing for yourself, but the result was very unexpected. Sunwoo was big, bigger than expected, and different. You could feel these ridges along his length, starting to wonder what that would feel like inside you. Although you didn’t have to wait too long.
Sunwoo pressed his lips to yours once more and then you felt something stretching you open. You moaned into the kiss, feeling the slow movement of his length going inside you, every little bump making you whine. You were quiet surprised you could take all of his like that. There was a moment of discomfort as you adjusted to the feeling, practically on the edge of being split in two. You whimpered as the slightest of movement shook your whole body. When he started moving you knew you were going to go insane. Sunwoo was taking in everything, your scent, your sounds, the slight twitches all over your body. He was going to enjoy this.
He wasn’t sure if you were ready, but he didn’t have much patience. Sunwoo pulled out nearly all the way before slamming back into you, over and over again. Your whole body moved with him, shaking and crying out in delight. He played you like an instrument, his giant cock rubbing against your sweet spot at every moment. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, incoherent sounds of pleasure spilling out of you. Sunwoo had your arms pinned above your head with one hand, the other trailing along your stomach, making you twitch. He purposely had his claws out to tease your exposed flesh, loving the reactions he was getting out of you. Every part of you was on fire, and his touch was fanning the flames.
You felt this bundle heat and sensations building up inside of you, well aware of what it meant. You tried to tell Sunwoo, but you still couldn’t do words. Although it seemed he understood your desperate pleas. He let go of your arms and grabbed onto your hips, the tips of his claws digging into your skin ever so slightly. He just needed a better grip to ram into you, his movements becoming erratic as he wanted to see you tremble in pleasure beneath him. You grabbed onto Sunwoo’s arms, mouth hanging open as you reached climax. You screamed out his name, shaking and twitching, getting more stimulation as you squeezed him tightly. Your lips were so inviting Sunwoo divided down to kiss you once again.
You moaned into the kiss, trying to devour him in your own way. He tasted so sweet you just wanted more and more. You didn’t really have a chance to calm down as Sunwoo kept moving, not losing his rhythm. He definitely had more stamina than you, so he took advantage of your sensitive state, building you up to another orgasm and forcing it out of you. Even if you were tired your body still reacted to him, holding him tightly, and letting him do whatever he pleased. You had devolved to a whimpering mess, more of a ragdoll in his arms. Your vision faded in and out, but you still felt every inch of him. The only distinction you could make was when Sunwoo’s movements became sloppy, his hot breath against your ear followed by the feeling of something warm inside you.
Sunwoo rested on top of you, breathing heavily and making low groans, his hips twitching and continuing to move, pushing his seed deeper and deeper into you. He seemed very content, nuzzling your neck, and mumbling sweet nothings. You could only respond with content whines, a ditzy smile on your face. You were floating on cloud nine, and had no idea when you’d come down. Although things did take a sudden turn for you. One moment you were laying on the dock with Sunwoo on top of you, and the next thing you knew you were in the water. The cold water seemed to snap you back to reality and you began to flail, trying to float. You managed to calm yourself a bit, but then something yanked on your leg and pulled you under.
You fought back and freed yourself, not caring to know what was happening and began swimming to shore. Once again your leg was grabbed and you were yanked beneath the water. You thought it was over this time, but you were suddenly grabbed by another force and brought up to the surface. You gasped as you took a breath in, unable to see as your vision was blurred by water. Someone was dragging you to the shore, but you noticed a clawed hand wrapping around your ankle. You could barely make out the yellow eyes staring at you, but that was the least of your concerns. Before you could scream and ear piercing screech filled th air. You slammed your hands over your ears, but it did little to block out the sound.
The hand had let you go and you heard a splash in the water. A moment later the sound disappeared. You took a moment to compose yourself and then realized what was going on. You were sitting on the shore, a few of the boys around you, and others knee deep in the water. They all seemed to be recovering from the sound as well, except for Sangyeon. He was speaking, but you couldn’t really make out his words. Then you began to remember you were naked. You quickly tried to cover yourself, but hands grabbed you and pulled you to your feet. A towel was wrapped around you and then you were swept off your feet. Sangyeon was carrying you bridal style, heading back to the main cabin.
“Are you okay?”
“Wa… what happened…?”
“You tell me.”
“Uh… I…”
“Kidding. Just take it easy, you’re fine.”
“I don’t feel fine…”
“I know.”
Sangyeon took you to your room and let you take a shower, properly cleaning yourself up, from head to toe, and then dressing yourself in fresh clothes. He was sitting in your bed and waiting. You were still a bit unsteady on your feet, and stuck close to the wall, holding onto the furniture. It didn’t take Sangyeon long to notice and bring you over to the bed so you could sit down. You mumbled a small thanks.
“Does your chest hurt? Or anything else besides… well you know.”
“No… but what… Sunwoo…”
“He was the first to break. My money was on Juyeon.”
“What the hell are you talking about? You said you brought me here for… that thing… but Sunwoo-”
“During breeding season a siren goes into a frenzy. There’s only one thing on their mind, and they’ll search for the nearest thing to satiate them. For the most part we stay in the water, but you were nearby, so he took advantage of that.”
“I… I wasn’t in my right mind… I didn’t mean-”
“Don’t blame yourself too much. We excrete a very lovely type of aphrodisiac to make our partners more agreeable. It’s okay to say you enjoyed yourself.”
“Fuck you. That’s not fair.”
“Sunwoo was just the beginning. Although I will apologize for him as he nearly drowned you.”
“Let me guess, he wasn’t in his right mind because of the frenzy?”
“Basically. He wanted to take you back to his cave.”
“What?”
“Why do you think the lake is so big? We all have our own little caves down there. Of course he’d want to take you there, but you obviously can’t breathe under water.”
“No shit.”
“I’ll get him to apologize when he comes back to his senses.”
“Forget that. I want to leave. If that’s what’s gonna happen to me again, I want no part!”
Sangyeon chuckled. “We’ve been over this. You’re not leaving.”
“I’m certain there are plenty of other girls, or boys, who’d be down to help you through this, but not me! You managed last time without me, so leave me out of this!”
“They were very upset last time. Many wanted to chase after you, but it’s not safe to leave the waterfall. I’m not going to upset them again.”
“I don’t care about that! Find someone else, or better yet, another siren! You said it’s breeding season, and I’m not about to get pregnant!”
“A siren can’t impregnate a human, it’s a very rare thing. Which is all the more reason to have you around.”
“Then like I said before, find someone else.”
“They don’t want anyone else, and neither do I.”
Sangyeon came over to your side and pinned you down on the bed. Your heart was racing but you tried to keep your cool.
“You enjoyed yourself, we all know it. So you don’t have to lie and be upset. We heard you turn into a mess out there.”
“… you… you did…?”
“It was music to my ears. You know, we’re all the same down there, although maybe just different sizes. Tell me, how was it? A whole new experience right?”
“…”
“You don’t have to be shy. I know you wanna do it again, and you’ll get to, just be patient. It starts with one, but that’s all it takes to drag the rest of us down. There’s nowhere you can go to escape us, so look forward to that.”
Sangyeon placed a small kiss on your head and excused himself. It wasn’t until he closed the door that you let out the breath you were holding. You felt so hot, aware of the burning in your cheeks. You shouldn’t be into any of this, and you were certain he had influenced you somehow, but you had to focus. They all overpowered you, and the way Sunwoo was acting before, you’d be in major trouble if it was more than one next time. You needed to get out, but the problem now was your leg. There was no way you could make the swim out to the waterfall right now, so there had to be another way.
For the rest of the day you stayed in your room. One of the others brought you food, leaving outside your door. You didn’t want to eat, but you were going to need your strength. You stared out your window towards the lake and the waterfall. Right now the best idea seemed to be to get as close to the waterfall as you could from land, and then swim the rest of the way. The only other problem was to figure out when. At night the water would be very cold, and your vision would be impaired. You figured early morning would be the right time, so it was probably best to go to sleep now. You were quite tired after all.
🖤
It was a bit difficult to sleep, as you kept waking up after a while. At least you didn’t miss sunrise. The cabin was quiet, and you carefully made your way outside. The rest of the camp area seemed quiet, and even the lake was still. You had mapped out your path the day before, so you just made sure to keep hidden and made your way towards the waterfall. When you got to the end of the path you carefully got into the water, making sure no one was around to notice you. Once in the water you cautiously made your way to the waterfall, trying not to let the cold overwhelm you. It would have been worse if it was night time. 
You thought back to how you made it to the back of the waterfall with Sangyeon before, although this was a different waterfall so things would be different. In theory it was the same, climbing up on some rocks and carefully making it towards the back of the waterfall. The danger was how slippery the rocks were as they were always coated in water. Still, you managed to make it, feeling relief and quite proud of yourself too. You admired the waterfall for a moment before going into the cave behind it. Sunlight came in through some holes in the ceiling, illuminating your path. You walked down this tunnel until it opened up into a bigger room. You began looking around for a way out, but to your horror there didn’t seem to be one.
You walked around, but there was nothing but rock surrounding you. The only way out was through the tunnel you had come from. This was just a room. There was a small puddle of water at the center, only going up to your ankles. Even the holes in the ceiling didn’t seem big enough for a person, and there was no way you could climb up to escape. You collapsed to the floor in defeat, realizing there really was no way out of this place. You pulled up your knees to your chest, hugging them. You had no idea what to do now, and you certainly had no idea how much time passed. You only snapped out of your daze when you heard someone approaching. You quickly got up, scared for what would happen next.
“How’d you get here?” Younghoon looked you up and down. “I didn’t know you knew about this place.”
“…”
“Ah, did you think there was a way out of here behind the waterfall? That’s cute, but we meant it when we said you weren’t leaving.”
“Just let me go… please… I don’t know how long this breeding season thing lasts for you, but I want out, now.”
“You’re not just here for that. You’ll be staying with us permanently.”
“What!?”
“It would be nice to have someone else around, and we all like you.”
“I have a life! You can’t just-”
“Do you really want to go back?”
“I… I…” You started feeling dizzy. “Uh…”
“You humans tend to live such boring lives. Wouldn’t it be more fun to stay here with us? We can give you everything and more. If you’re having all these pesky thoughts bothering you, I can just wash them away.” Younghoon stepped towards you. “Would you like that? Do you want me to take away all those bad thoughts?”
“Stay… stay back… you…”
“Sh, you know, we come here for some privacy, so imagine my joy finding you here.”
“I… no… no…”
“I’m certain Sunwoo took good care of you, shall I continue where he left off? Did you like the way he felt inside you? I promise I’m just as big.”
“Stop… stop it…”
“That’s not what you really want, is it?”
Younghoon pinned you to the wall, watching you curiously. His eyes had changed to that golden yellow, and a few scales decorated his skin. He gently caressed your cheek, no claws present, but other siren features were.
“How about a little taste, before I spiral down into madness. Strip for me, baby.”
Despite the sorrow of realizing you were trapped, the fear of being caught, none of that seemed to matter anymore. Your head was fuzzy like before, and you felt oddly calm with Younghoon. His words flowed into your head and were welcomed with open arms. When he asked you to strip it just seemed like the right thing to do. You started with your top, slipping it past your head and tossing it to the side. Younghoon helped you with your bra, happily taking in your exposed breasts. You reached down to slide off your shorts and panties, feeling the chill of the cave, causing you to shiver.
“I’ll warm you up in a bit.”
Younghoon stripped out of his clothes. Your gaze took him in, unable to resist running your hands along his chest and feeling his scales. He was wet and slimy, and you quite liked that. He was like a fantasy come true. Fingers wrapped around your chin and raised your gaze, Younghoon capturing your lips in a kiss. It was natural to kiss back, getting another taste of the unknown sweetness. You felt yourself melting into this sensation, moreso when you felt a hand between your legs, teasing your folds. You mewled into the kiss, jumping up a bit when you felt something cold push into you.
“There’s a good girl.” 
Even in the cold you felt warm, and it was slowly spreading. Younghoon worked you over with one finger before adding another, his thumb rubbing your little nub in circles, just adding to the stimulation. You were whimpering, the fog in your head already making you lose the ability to communicate. Despite taking things slow, Younghoon had little patience. He pulled his fingers out without warning, grabbing your hips and lifting you up off the ground with ease. You could understand what he was doing, and followed his movements without being told. You wrapped your legs around him, feeling something poking at your entrance before you sank onto it, taking it all at once.
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you were suddenly filled to the brim, stretched wide open and feeling those bumps running along inside you. Younghoon was whispering dirty things in your ear, his hot breath making you squirm. Every little movement just sent another wave of pleasure coursing through your body. It didn’t matter that rocks pressed against your back, or that you weren’t entirely in your right mind. At the moment the only thing that mattered was you and Younghoon. Your mouth hung open in silent ecstasy as he provided you with a whole new experience. Gravity played a part in all this as no matter how he moved, you’d always sink down on him to the base, feeling every inch.
He kept his movements steady and it was a testament to his strength. You couldn’t imagine anyone else doing such a thing, but he played his part wonderfully. He didn’t break a sweat as he rocked his hips into you, stealing a kiss from you every now and then. His moans mixed with your own, echoing in the room. You felt hot, like you were burning from the inside out, but it was a pleasurable feeling. Your whimpering became more desperate as you were nearing your climax, and Younghoon took note of this with joy. He took one of your nipples into his mouth, adding to the sweet sensations that were overwhelming you completely.
You ran your fingers through his hair, barely able to whimper his name before you cried out in ecstasy as an orgasm shook your body. Younghoon pressed his lips against your when you came, wanting you to moan into his mouth and get more of his sweet lips. You were so drunk on him that your vision had blurred. A soft voice lulled you into a safe space, telling you to let go and relax. It was so easy to listen and just focus on the nice feeling between your legs, taking care of everything. You couldn’t tell when Younghoon had lost it with you, but you certainly felt something warm between your legs as another orgasm took over and made you scream. At some point you were moved off the wall, soon being laid down on your back and feeling water.
Younghoon assaulted every bit of exposed flesh with kisses, starting to leave bruises and holding back from straight up leaving bite marks. He just wanted to mark you and claim you for himself at this moment. You held him close, your body still moving with his as he was trying to make this feeling last for as long as he could. You were both desperately needy, and there was no one to get in the way. Younghoon was mumbling against your skin, but you couldn’t make out his words. At one point you could see those golden eyes stare down at you with hunger and then everything went dark.
🖤
You gasped awake, looking around in a panic before realizing you were back in your room in the main cabin. You breathed a sigh of relief, but when you tried to get out of bed you collapsed to the floor. Your legs were sore like never before, and as you tried to stand you noticed all the marks on your arms. The best you could do was pull yourself back up onto your bed. The sun was nearing its peak and you could barely remember your morning. You knew you had gotten up to get to the waterfall, but from there things seemed to blur. You were pulled from your thoughts when there was a knock at the door.
“You’re awake.
“Huh?”
“I was a bit worried when Younghoon brought you back to shore and you were half conscious. I guess he really did a number on you.” Sangyeon chuckled. “He certainly broke the rules.”
“Rules… I…”
“Sh, I’m sure he already messed with your memories in the hopes of not getting in trouble, but that’s not gonna work. Here. I brought you some medicine, should heal you up.”
“Thanks… I guess…”
Sangyeon offered you some pills and a glass of water, which you took. You laid back on the bed, just wanting to go back to sleep after whatever happened.
“You’re really not gonna let me go… once this is all over, right?”
“You won’t stop with that, will you?”
“What if I say no?”
“What are you gonna do right now? Run away? You can’t even stand. I’m lucky Younghoon didn’t try dragging you into the water. I won’t be able to stop them all when they go into a frenzy.”
“Won’t you be in the mess with them?”
“Exactly my point.”
“Amuse me then… how do I go back?”
“The only way out is through an underwater tunnel. You’ll never be able to reach it, even if you could breathe underwater, you can’t move as fast as us. Besides, there are multiple tunnels down there, you won’t find the right one.”
“How many people have you trapped here before?”
“No one. My boys like their space.”
“Wait, so I’m the first person you’ve ever brought here?”
“Yup.”
“What about other sirens?”
“Like I said, my boys like their space.”
“So… why… what’s so special about me?”
“I don’t know. You’re beautiful, intelligent, sexy. They don’t always agree on things, but you piqued their interest, mine as well. There’s no harm having a nice little pet around. It’ll make this place feel more like home.”
“I’m not some pet!”
“Yet you like it when there’s something nice and big between your legs, acting like a little creature in heat. You can say whatever you want about our influence, but we’re just bringing out your desires. Rest up, I don’t know when they’ll snap.”
You didn’t want to argue anymore, needing to go over the fact there was no way out. Well, there was, you just couldn’t access it. This place was supposed to be home now. You stared out the window, zoning out a bit as you took it all in. Everything was really beautiful, as if it was a work of fiction. It really wouldn’t be bad to live here, but you had your own life. Now that you thought about it, you realized there wasn’t exactly much to return to. There was school, getting your degree in the hopes of building your life. You had some friends, but given what Sangyeon said, you were probably a missing person’s case that had no explanation. You weren’t sure there was anyone who would seriously look for you, regardless if they had their memories messed with or not.
When that came to mind you shook your head. There was a chance none of these thoughts were your own, but something they had planted. Still, you couldn’t resist the idea to just let everything go and stay here, live in peace and happiness. Even if you had been trying to figure out a way to escape, you couldn’t deny your time here had been nice, in multiple ways. It kinda felt like time didn’t matter, and even if you were being difficult, the boys were just waiting for you to warm up to them. The funniest thing was that this whole situation was probably someone’s wildest dream and you were fighting it so hard. You took a breath and laid down in bed. You had a lot to think about, but you definitely needed to rest as well.
🖤
You inhaled softly as you regained consciousness, seeing that it was dark out. Your stomach grumbled and you realized you hadn’t eaten all day. Although the problem was you weren’t so sure you could get up and walk. You had no idea where the others were, or how you would even reach them. So you took a breath and got up. You were still unsteady on your feet, but you could more or less stand. You stumbled your way to the door and out into the hall, using the wall as support and making your way to the kitchen. You were doing well, but one wrong step cause your legs to give out. You nearly collapsed to the floor, but were caught by someone before you hit the ground.
“I thought you were gonna sleep the whole day away.” Hyunjae joked. “You okay?”
“Fine…”
“You must be hungry. We have some leftovers saved for you.”
“Thanks…”
Hyunjae brought you over to the kitchen and had you sit at the table. He heated up some food for you and brought it over. Your hands worked just fine, but he insisted on feeding you.
“I’m not a baby.”
“You’re my baby, now open wide.”
You were hungry, so you weren’t going to fight him much. You ate and afterwards he gave you some medicine. That’s when you finally noticed the marks on your arms were gone.
“How…”
“You think we’d just hurt you?” Hyunjae scoffed. “Come on. We can’t break you so easily.”
“Do you… like me… or am I… just some toy…?”
“Hm… when we saw you at the waterfall a year ago we were entranced by your beauty, as if you were a siren yourself. You seemed so joyous and happy, your smile so bright. We were curious to know what you were like. We tried to bring you here before, but your friend got you out of the water before we could get to you. We didn’t realize that would traumatize you, sorry.”
“It’s fine. I just thought I was insane for a year.”
“I could just make you forget that.”
“I’m certain you’ve already messed with my memories.”
“Maybe. Only good things, I promise.”
“What happens… after…?”
“After what?”
“… well… after… the season…?”
“Oh, you mean that. Well, I guess we’ll see, but the idea certainly isn’t to discard you or anything like that. We waited a long time for you.”
“Hm.”
“Alright, if you’re done, I’ll get you back to bed, you’re probably still tired.”
“Yeah.”
Hyunjae tucked you in for the night, and you found it easy to fall asleep. You probably shouldn’t have eaten so late, but you needed something in order to keep up your strength. You slept until morning, waking to the sounds of birds chirping. You had expected someone to wake you, but there was no one at your bedside when you opened your eyes. You didn’t think much of it and got up, realizing your legs were much better. Once you washed up you headed out of your room, but the cabin was eerily quiet. Perhaps the others were still asleep, and you didn’t want to bother anyone. 
So you made your way out of the cabin and towards one of the docks, sitting at the edge and letting your legs dangle. A morning view like this was something you could get used to. The sunlight danced on the surface of the lake in such a way that made it sparkle. The sounds of the waterfall filled the air, providing a soft melody. It wouldn’t be a bad idea to sleep outside one of these days. You weren’t even sure what the stars looked like at night. You were lost in your own mind, thinking of all the possibilities when you suddenly heard shouting.
“Get away from the water!”
“Hm?”
You looked back to see Sangyeon running towards you. Before you could make a move to stand something wrapped around your leg and pulled you down. You screamed, but managed to hold onto a loose board in the dock. Sangyeon came over to your side, grabbing you and letting out an ear piercing screech.  You yelled, but you couldn’t do anything to diminish the noise. Whatever was holding onto you let go and Sangyeon pulled you up, getting you away from the water’s edge.
“Are you okay?”
“What… what was that?”
“Sorry, some of the boys have been in the lake since yesterday, and I know what that means.”
“Ah… how… how many…?”
“Eight of them, and I have no idea how much longer the rest of us will last.”
“Is it a bad thing to fight it?”
“Partially, but I have to make sure they don’t hurt you.”
“That’s gonna be hard to do if they’re goal is to drag me in the water.”
“Let’s just get back to the cabin.”
Sangyeon got you back to safety, checking on your leg to make sure it wasn’t bruised or sprained. Thankfully you were fine. The two of you prepared breakfast, but you could tell Sangyeon was anxious. It was starting to make you feel uneasy, so you tried to distract yourself.
“Earlier… when you… screeched… do you do that often? I thought sirens had these beautiful voices that they use to sing.”
“Are you saying my voice isn’t beautiful? We’ve sang for you before.”
“With the intention of manipulating me… but with the type of persuasion powers you have, I guess your voices must be divine.”
“Precisely. As for the other thing, I only use that when I need them to back off and I know they won’t listen to reason.”
“I see… well, it really hurts.”
“Imagine how they must feel with sensitive hearing.”
“Right… uh… how old are you?”
“Don’t you think that’s mean to ask?”
“Uh, well… I don’t know… you look like you’re in your twenties… all of you really…”
“I’ll just say we’re older than that.”
“So you guys don’t age?”
“Not really.”
“Are you immortal?”
“Why? Are you gonna start looking for a way to kill us?”
“Just wondering…”
“Then I’ll leave you guessing.”
“Meanie.”
You both ate breakfast together, but you weren’t really hungry. Sangyeon noticed and encouraged you to eat, saying you needed your strength. Although that wasn’t entirely motivational.
“What… what’s gonna happen to me…?”
“Honestly. You’re gonna black out.” 
“How long is this supposed to last?”
“Days.”
“Days! I… how are you not supposed to-”
“Easy. We’re not all gonna pounce on you at once. We have each other to mess with, and believe me, no one is gonna be allowed to hurt you.”
“You can’t promise that when you’re talking about going into a frenzy, all of you! I can’t do anything to defend myself!”
“Not that you’d want to.”
“Shut it!”
“Just saying.”
“I… I need to think…”
“About what? The outcome is the same either way.”
“Yeah, thanks for that reminder.”
You left the table and stormed off to your room, slamming the door behind you. Once you were alone you let out a breath, sinking to the ground. The most annoying part of all of this was the tingling sensation between your legs. As messed up as this all sounded, you hated the bit of excitement that was slowly starting to course through you. Just one of those boys was able to mess you up, so you couldn’t imagine what would happen to you if they all got their hands on you. More than anything though, you were confused on how this was all supposed to go down. The others were in the lake, and you certainly couldn’t breath underwater. You were pulled out of your thoughts when you heard a knock at your door. You quickly got up and opened it.
“Hey, Jacob, where were you for breakfast?”
“Busy. Mind if I come in?”
“Uh, sure… is everything okay?”
“I was gonna ask you the same thing.” Jacob sat down on your bed. “How are you feeling? Better now, I’d hope.”
“Yeah. I’m fine.”
“Good. So how about we go for a swim.”
“Sangyeon told me to stay out of the water for now.”
“He’s just saying that, come on, the two of us can have some fun.”
Jacob got up and came over to you, taking your hands in his. He had a sweet smile on his lips, but something felt off.
“Jacob, are you okay?”
“Fine. Just so happy you’re here with us this time.”
“Right… I actually need to clean up and-”
“You don’t need to lie with me. I’m not gonna hurt you.”
“I didn’t say-”
“Trust me. Take a deep breath, and just relax.”
“Uh…”
“I want to take you somewhere special. Follow me.”
“… okay…”
Jacob pressed a kiss to your cheek and led you out of the room, but was quickly interrupted. Sangyeon separated the two of you, pushing you back into your room and shutting the door. A moment later you snapped out of your daze, realizing what had just happened. You quickly locked the door, stepping away from it. You knew time was running out, and you had nowhere to hide. Your heart was racing and you were trying to think straight, but your thoughts just drifted from fear to excitement, and everything in between. Somehow you managed to calm your mind, sitting on the floor against the bed, wondering what you should do.
“Y/n, open the door.”
You heard the knob turn, followed by Sangyeon’s voice. You quickly stood, but hesitated as you reached to open the door. It had been a while since you last saw Sangyeon, and you weren’t sure if it was a good idea to see him right now.
“Open up.”
“I’m okay… Jacob didn’t do anything…”
“That’s good, but I still need you to open the door.”
“Why? We can talk like this.”
“Don’t be silly. Open the door and let me in.”
“No.”
“No?” Sangyeon chuckled and slammed his fist against the door. “This isn’t a debate sweetie. Let me in, or I’ll force my way in.”
“Sangyeon… you… you’re scaring me…”
“Good… then you know where we’re at. You know you can’t run, so open the door before it’s too late!”
“I don’t-”
Another loud bang against the door startled you. It was instinct to look around for some escape route, but it was pointless. Next thing you knew the door swung open. Sangyeon calmly walked in, his golden eyes finding you immediately. You thought to run, to get past him, but he caught you so easily.
“Relax. You’re perfectly safe.”
“… sangyeon…”
“Come.”
Sangyeon led you out of the room and outside, walking towards the lake. You noticed the sun setting, realizing it was nearly dark. You hadn’t noticed so much time passing. Although as you got closer you began struggling against Sangyeon.
“… wait…”
“Sh, everything’s going to be okay, I promise.”
You came to the end of the dock, and your gaze turned to the water. You could vaguely make out shapes swimming in the water just below the surface. As you were distracted Sangyeon slipped another one of those gummy spheres into your mouth.
“Eat it.”
Sangyeon’s gaze on you was so soft, mixed with the sweet melody of his voice, whatever fears you had before were all washed away. You ate the gummy as he asked, somewhat having forgotten what the effects were before it came back to you. Your eyes went wide as you struggled to breath, but Sangyeon pulled you close.
“You’re so beautiful.”
He pressed his lips to yours, stealing away what little breath you had left, and letting you fall into the water. You immediately went under, no longer struggling to breathe. It took a moment for your panic to stop, for the air bubbles to clear your vision. You could see everything around you clearly, but you weren’t looking in the right direction. You made a move towards the surface, only for something to grab your leg and pull you down. When you looked to see what it was, a multitude of yellow eyes stared back, and then your world cut to black. 
🖤
You inhaled sharply, only to find yourself coughing up a bit of water. Your vision was a blur, yet you moved to get on your hands and knees. Although the problem was your legs were incredibly sore, and you felt bloated. Still, you pushed through that and looked around, finding yourself at the center of a unique scene. You recognized where you were, the cave behind the waterfall, and you weren’t alone. The rest of the boys were scattered around you, all seeming to be in some shifted form or another, and not really wearing clothes. That’s when you noticed all you had on was a large t-shirt.
You began to examine your body, seeing all the purple markings on your exposed skin, a few cuts here and there as well. You were also in water, realizing there was far more here than last time. You tried to stand, but your legs weren’t really working, and you slipped, falling on top of one of the boys. He had been sleeping a moment ago, but was startled awake when you hit him. He quickly pinned you down, seeming ferocious before recognizing you and calming down. Juyeon had a ditzy smile on his face and leaned down to nuzzle your neck.
“My baby’s awake…”
“Uh… what… what happened…”
“You’re the best.”
“Ju… Juyeon…”
“Sh. Forget about the bad things and just stay…”
“… stay…”
“Good girl, our good girl.”
“… good…”
“Very good.”
Yellow eyes seemed to fill your vision, making everything spin. You couldn’t help the childish smile that adorned your lips. Despite the water around you felt warm, and safe. Juyeon stole a kiss from you, filling your mouth with a sweet taste, further reminding you everything was okay. This was where you needed to be, and where you would remain forever.
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itsbeeble · 11 months ago
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BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT
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THE TBZ FRAT HOUSE IS HOSTING THE BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT COLLAB BY @juyeonszn AND @itsbeeble!
YOU'RE INVITED!
PAIRINGS: tbz x f!reader
GENRES: smut, fluff, minimal angst, crack
WARNINGS: smut, minor angst, fluff, mentions of injuries, alcohol, swearing, more warnings to be added to the individual fics 18+ MINORS AND BLANK BLOGS DO NOT INTERACT
SUMMARY: Have you ever wondered what your favorite frat boyz are up to in their personal lives? If so, then these fics are just for you! Join us as we take a glimpse into the Tau Beta Zeta fraternity and see what they get up to in their free time!
MORE: The way me and Fawn have been planning this for so long omgggg. Me and Fawn are so excited to announce this collab in celebration of my 1 year on tumblr, 6 year anniversary of The Boyz, AND as just a fun little event!! I hope you guys are as excited for this as I am hehe. And please feel free to send an ask or comment on this post if you'd like to be tagged in each part!!
PERM TAGLIST: @juyeonszn @winterchimez
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FALL SEMESTER
TRY HARD — LEE JUYEON (12/6)
Need to get rid of some junk? Well these college hunks will haul YOUR junk! Give us a call at xxx-xxx-JUNK and we’ll haul YOUR junk for FREE! (limited time offer)
EXCITEMENT — JI CHANGMIN (12/6)
You know, when you told your girl friends that you’d never finished before, you were expecting it to blow over like no big deal. What you weren’t expecting was for it to spiral into a whole other mess.
SEEING STARS — KIM SUNWOO (12/10)
It’s slightly embarrassing how Sunwoo is naive enough to take Eric Sohn’s “advice” to heart. Luckily, you like idiots. Especially when they kick a ball into your face and agree to do a semester’s worth of schoolwork for you.
CLUMSY — JU HAKNYEON (12/10)
When Haknyeon ran into you at a TBZ party for the first time, he didn’t think he would fall for you so quickly. Or literally. Or both simultaneously. But there’s a first time for everything, he supposes.
"FRIENDLY" COMPETITION — LEE SANGYEON (12/14)
The TBZ frat had always had a rivalry with the KAT sorority. At least, they did when you and Sangyeon became the presidents three years ago. What happens when you mix a little friendly competition into this rivalry of yours?
JE NE SAIS QUOI — JACOB BAE (12/14)
Jacob thought the concept of fraternities was stupid. So stupid that despite every single one of his friends being in one, he still refused to join. However, after meeting you at one of the TBZ parties, he’s starting to think maybe they’re not that horrible.
SPRING SEMESTER
LET LOOSE — KIM YOUNGHOON (12/19)
Younghoon has hated you since the day he met you. He thought you were stuck up with that better-than-you princess attitude of yours. What better than to just…fuck it right out of you?
(NO) STRINGS ATTACHED — LEE HYUNJAE (12/19)
Becoming friends with Lee Hyunjae after his valiant attempt to save your life (stopping you from drunk driving) was certainly not on your year’s bingo card. Also not on your bingo card? Waking up in his bed every other night following, but it’s not like you’re really complaining.
NO BITCHES? — ERIC SOHN (12/22)
When you met Eric, you’d thought he was just another frat boy, looking to get into any woman’s pants (particularly yours at that moment). You never would’ve thought that he was just a loser who really liked FNAF and just thought you were pretty.
PARTY O'CLOCK — CHOI CHANHEE (12/22)
In spite of being a frat boy himself, Chanhee could never actually see himself enjoying the luxuries of the title. Besides, how could he with all the responsibilities of being treasurer? Enter you and your carefree spirit and Chanhee’s got a real big problem on his hands.
PRINCESS AND THE PAUPER — KEVIN MOON (PT. 1 | PT. 2)
It wasn’t like you and Kevin hated each other. In fact, you quite admired him despite his somewhat indifferent attitude toward you. Well, now that you’re paired up for the last dance of the year, you guess it’s the perfect time to find out why.
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© juyeonszn & itsbeeble. do not steal, claim, or repost.
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hcuyk · 7 months ago
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OUR INFERNO | CHAPTER ONE
SYNOPSIS ✧ despite being your greatest archnemesis/rival/enemy/frenemy/whateverthefuck he was, hyunjae had always been by your side. that changed when your boyfriend was brought up, creating a newfound rift in your whateverthefuck relationship with hyunjae
PAIRING ✧ rival!hyunjae x fem!reader
GENRE ✧ high school au, enemies to fwb, angst, smut, fluff(?), humor(?) (these mfs bicker a lot), pining
WARNINGS ✧ 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT — cheating, profanity, mentions of physical fight/bruises, underaged drinking, obsessive/possessive hyunjae : NSFW TAGS :  outdoor/semipublic sex, dubcon recording, spit/drool/tears, oral and fingering (fem receiving), penetration, scratching/ripping, humping, minimal praise, degradation, sub!hyunjae for 0.002 seconds, petnames (princess, good girl, babe/baby, slut)
WORD COUNT ✧ 19k
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⋮≡ [ OUR INFERNO EXCLUSIVE ] @deoboyznet @flwoie @sanaxo-o — fill out the form or comment/send an ask/dm to be added!
. . . . . . OUR INFERNO M.LIST ✩ next [ TWO ]
⋮≡ [ PERMANENT TAGLIST ] @armysantiny @stealanity @zzoguri @nyujjan @tinisprout @the-kpop-simp @sunwoosberrie @winterchimez — fill out the form or comment/send an ask/dm to be added!
THE BOYZ MASTERLIST | NAVIGATION
AUTHOR'S NOTE : in honor of my three years of officially stanning the boyz on this very day, let's celebrate with my smut debut and writing comeback 😋 enjoy my loves
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PART ONE: CHASING THE SPARK (THE FIRE TETRAHEDRON) — fuel, oxygen, and heat | CHAPTER ONE
“Genuine question.”
“Shoot.”
“Who the fuck does Hyunjae actually think he is?”
Unphased by your up-and-coming rage rant, Kevin resumed snacking on the protein bar he had brought with him. He tossed his free arm over the camera equipment and backpacks sitting next to him on the bench, watching you stride back and forth within one of the many hallways in the recreational center. 
“Well, he is your boss.”
“No, he’s the student executive producer,” you corrected, your legs unwavering as you kept a consistent pace to release your frustrations. Kevin shrugged and tossed one leg over the other, staying relaxed despite the hot fumes emanating from your upright and angered figure. You paused momentarily to look him in the eye. 
“Emphasis on the student,” you clarified.
“Emphasis on the executive, Y/N.”
Baffled at how he was defending your greatest archnemesis (well, more like your greatest frenemy), you ignored his rebuttal and started pacing again. Your steps slowed as you envisioned the sensations you experienced just minutes before, back when you, Kevin, and Hyunjae were at the indoor pool to report for your school’s broadcasting channel. Technically, you were the one reporting and filming while Hyunjae was the subject of interest, and Kevin was there for physical support. 
Chills latched onto your skin as you remembered what it felt like to have Hyunjae’s bare torso looming over you, his eyes peering over your shoulder to glance at your footage. While staring at the camera, his gentle, irregular breaths would continuously hit your skin. Water from the pool would trickle down his hair and into your shirt, reaching your backside. When it happened, you could barely comprehend Hyunjae’s ‘advice’ and instead focused on feeling every cold droplet travel through the crevasses created by your spine. You winced at the thought of that happening again, yet somehow you could still hear his irritating voice near your ear, telling you all the reasons why your B-roll of his lap swimming was ‘trash’ and ‘unusable.’
For a moment, you stood there in the hallway frozen, unsure of how to move, before realizing you were just reliving a moment from earlier and that Hyunjae was still in the locker room changing.
“I’m going to make a complaint,” you declared, turning back towards Kevin for his encouragement. Alternatively, you were met with the sight of your best friend completely failing to conceal his judgment and disapproval towards your suggestion.
“Against Hyunjae? You gotta be kidding, right?”
“Yes,” you answered confidently. “Wait, I mean no, I’m not kidding, but yes, against Hyunjae.”
Kevin eyed you skeptically, trying to decipher why you felt threatened enough to report someone like Hyunjae. You may not have spent all your previous years in high school with an affinity for Hyunjae, but it wasn’t like you hated him either—not in the way you truly loathed others. If that were the case, you wouldn’t spend nearly every day with him, bickering until the sun chose to set.
“Sure, maybe my B-roll was trash, I can attest to that, but that does not give his bitchass the right to not only shit on how ‘awful’ I was doing, but also yank the camera out of my hands and delete all the footage I got because they weren’t ‘perfect enough.’ What kind of psycho is that?” You glanced over at Kevin, trying once again to get him to back you up, but the most he gave was a slight nod. Everything you were spurting was half-mindedly being decoded because he had ended up placing more significance on inhaling protein. Regardless, you continued.
“And you would think, hey! As the student executive producer of a high school broadcasting team, he would understand that no! I indeed do not record half-naked people swimming in a pool, whether it be for a career or a hobby. He should also at least have the decency to not swim seven hundred miles per minute while I’m recording. Of course I’m not going to catch up, especially when he barely told me how he wanted things to be recorded? Isn’t he fucking insane for that? Not to mention all the goddamn splashing because of how fucking long his limbs are—”
“You’re explaining this like I didn’t witness the whole exchange,” Kevin grumbled.
“And you would think he knows, right? That Mr. Executive-slash-Captain-of-the-Swim-Team should either be more considerate when, A, he’s kicking water in my direction when he’s swimming or, B, station me away from the edge of the pool? Just a thought, but fuck me, I guess.”
“Well yeah, but the—”
“Also! Not to mention the camera has the fucking ability to zoom in, so why was there even a need for me to stand by the pool anyway?” You scoffed at the absurdity, almost tempted to cackle like a villain because of it. “The least he could do was tell me how to record it or find a way to adjust and compromise without occasionally soaking me with water on purpose, which I know damn well he was—”
“That’s just how-”
“We have a tripod, for god’s sake!” you exclaimed. By now, Kevin had given up on providing you with his input. He opted to rest against the wall, finishing up whatever he had left of the protein bar, and occasionally would roll his eyes.
“But even then, who the fuck wants to see him swim anyway? We’ll probably only need like…what? A minute of the footage for the B-roll? So why the hell is he treating it like it’s about to be nominated by the goddamn Oscars for Best Picture? He just loves to nitpick and control me like a fucking puppet—”
“Keep talking and you’ll potentially strain your throat,” a new voice interrupted.
You jerked around to find Hyunjae, the culprit of your rant, exiting the locker room with a small duffle bag that contained both his swim gear and his school clothes from earlier in the day. His brown hair was only halfway dry, some strands still stuck to his forehead as he approached where you were pacing.
You halted in your path and stared him down. Hyunjae immediately caught onto the mood you were in, and instead of being shocked or hurt, he grinned.
“You.” 
Your attempt at threatening him with one word made Hyunjae laugh.
“Hey, I’m just looking out for you.”
“Oh here we go again,” Kevin mumbled, tossing the wrapper of the protein bar to the side. He pulled out his phone and went on TikTok, deciding it was more worthy of his attention than listening to you two banter—something he had been experiencing for well over five years.
As a mutual friend of yours and Hyunjae’s since middle school, Kevin understood the frenemy dynamic better than either of you. Eventually, over the long years he had known you both, he learned to leave you two be. 
“What about me, though? Are you going to try and tattletale on me?” Hyunjae feigned sympathy as he gave you an exaggerated pout, tilting his head like a puppy’s. “C’mon. I’m just doing my job.”
“Sorry, but I don’t remember ‘being a dick’ being listed under the requirements for your oh-so-important position of power.” You huffed at him and crossed your arms, choosing to face elsewhere as you rooted the soles of your feet to the ground.
Hyunjae furrowed his brows, his eyes never leaving you, as he addressed the third party within the shared space.
“Kevin, was I being a dick, or is Y/N exaggerating?”
Kevin glanced up at his phone and scrunched his nose at Hyunjae in annoyance.
“Don’t even try to bring me into whatever…this mess is.”
“No, tell him,” you demanded, now looking at him. Your glare was enough to burn Kevin into ashes, but it was nothing compared to Hyunjae’s gaze piercing into your back. Knowing that he never looked away made you shiver, hating how fixated he seemed to be—and seemingly without reason too.
“Listen, I wasn’t being a dick. I was treating you the same way I treat everyone else. I’d honestly argue that you’re just narcissistic and think everything is about you when—”
“Oh wow, thank you for admitting that you’re a dick to everyone else!” You tossed your hands up for dramatic appeal as you spun back around to look at him. He scoffed, but his demeanor was quickly shadowed by a smirk that appeared on his lips, testing you with the arch of his brow.
“Oh really? Do you see anyone else complaining?”
“I’m complaining,” Kevin muttered.
“People don’t complain because they’re scared of you, Sherlock,” you retorted. At this point, Hyunjae had already caught onto your bullshit of making evidence up, and it was why this exchange ended up lasting for as long as it did. Nevertheless, his ego continued to build the more you spoke.
“You’re not scared of me?”
And you keep falling for the bait.
“Why should I? You’re nothing.” You approached him and pressed a finger into his chest, taunting him as you stared straight into his eyes.
Suddenly a competition seemed to have materialized because now you both were locking eyes, too stubborn to look away. 
“One day you’ll wake up and realize your position doesn’t mean shit. You take it too seriously and make everyone’s job your job when this should be a learning experience for the rest of us.”
“And who exactly is ‘us,’ babe?”
You narrowed your eyes at him.
“Don’t call me that–”
“And it’s also starting to sound like jealousy to me.” Hyunjae’s eyes finally shifted, but instead of looking away from you like you initially wanted him to, you trailed his line of sight down to your lips. He eyed them shamelessly—technically making you win the unspoken eye contact competition, but at what cost? “I won’t believe you until I receive firm evidence and testimonies from the other students in the club, then maybe I’ll consider your concerns. Deal?”
What you despised most was how well Hyunjae knew and provoked you to get under your skin. He was a raging flame, making your blood boil from both irritation and excitement. You couldn’t pinpoint exactly what it was, but after nearly six years of banter with Hyunjae, you knew damn well you enjoyed every second of it. It was like a nonstop competition, and you were always on the edge of winning.
Maybe it was also because you were so used to him constantly being above you. He was the president of the student council, the swim team’s captain, and specifically the one who snatched the executive position away from you in the broadcasting team, yet somehow you were still able to compete at his level of arrogance and egotism. 
Even though you may never be able to top him in the foreseeable future, you at least knew how to match his fury—his fire, with your own.
“You’re pathetic.” You took a few steps back to gain some distance while his eyes flickered back up to yours. He bit his lip playfully, his smile only growing even wider.
“Woah, Y/N. Exposing my degradation kink so soon?”
“I-...you- w-what?!” you sputtered, your jaw falling slack as Kevin’s head snapped up, staring at the two of you in disgust.
“Get a room—!”
“I’m going to make sure you get degraded from your position, you freak!”
“Not exactly how that word works, princess, but I’m glad you’re at least passionate.” His cooing made you want to slap the living shit out of him, your eyes protruding from their sockets are you glared. 
“Are you fucking bricked up or something right now—?”
“Hey guys,” a woman’s voice called out. Your heads turned to look at the end of the hallway, catching one of the recreational center’s workers waving in your general direction. She pressed her lips together and smiled, attempting to be as professional and understanding as possible. “I’m sorry to interrupt, but is it okay if you guys turn it down a notch?”
You and Hyunjae both nodded and whispered apologies, feeling like kids who just got scolded for shoving paintbrushes down the drain. Fortunately, the worker’s smile radiated genuine warmth and consideration, providing you some sort of reassurance that you guys weren’t too much of a disturbance (even though you guys totally were).
“You two are the most childish fuckers I know,” Kevin deadpanned, finally shoving his phone away as he switched between looking at you and the man by your side. His eyebrows bunched up.
“And apparently horny too.”
“I would move across the country if it meant I never had to see him again,” you grumbled, striding back to the pile of equipment to pick up your backpack and the bag with all your reporting necessities (boring script, stationary, and a couple of notebooks shared with all the broadcasting students to collect notes and inspiration in). 
“Hello? I’m still here.”
“Look at that. He already misses me.”
“I’m going to hurl,” Kevin unnecessarily announced, and Hyunjae’s face soured.
“Ew.”
“Exactly. That’s how you two make me feel whenever you guys are together.” Kevin got up on his feet and grabbed the wrapper to shove into one of his pockets (no littering, kids) before outstretching his limbs dramatically. 
“I swear I developed back pain from always listening to you guys bicker.”
“Or, hot take,” Hyunjae interjected, “maybe it’s because you’re always sitting with your back arching forward like it belongs in the Arches National Park–”
“Yeah yeah, shut the fuck up.” Kevin waved him off with his hand and rolled his eyes. “I came here to help carry stuff, not listen to your bullshit.”
He picked up the bag that contained the camera and passed it to Hyunjae. He offered to hold one more thing, but with only his backpack and the tripod left, Kevin didn’t see much need for his friend’s assistance. 
Kevin then faced you, his face stern and rid of emotion.
“You too, Y/N,” he stated seriously. “None of this ‘he said this,’ ‘he said that,’ ‘please fuck me’ bullshit from you either.”
You gaped at him, arms wrapped tightly around the crew’s bag.
“Now why the hell do you think—”
“Zip it.”
Without giving you much of an opportunity to continue, Kevin sped off in front of you, ready to leave the building. You couldn’t even look at Hyunjae as heat rushed to your cheeks, struggling to trail after Kevin’s speedy steps.
Despite carrying heavier items, Hyunjae caught up to you with ease. You wanted nothing more than for Hyunjae’s feet to either slow down or speed up tremendously, but of course he purposely chose to walk by your side, attached to you by the hip.
“He sees it,” Hyunjae sing-songed. “Everyone sees it.”
“Sees what?” you snorted, oblivious to what he was indicating.
“That you want me,” he replied nonchalantly.
The moment you two stepped outside the doors of the center, you stopped to face him, trying to confirm what exactly he was implying.
“You can’t be serious.”
Hyunjae, who also stopped with your steps, shrugged.
“You’re the one in denial.”
Realizing that he was serious, you felt every muscle in your body tense up.
“Hyunjae,” you stated firmly. “I have a boyfriend, remember?”
Instead of receiving something witty from Hyunjae like normal, his relaxed facial features suddenly scrambled into one that expressed remote shock. His lips were slightly parted, eyes searching yours for any hint that indicated you were lying or messing around with him, but you were serious.
The aggressive playfulness from earlier had evaporated faster than boiling water, and you watched as he became stilled. Your heart started pounding, anxiety creeping up within you due to not being able to read Hyunjae like you normally do.
“Since when?” he asked. His voice was quiet, his tone firmer, and by now, Kevin was already by his car, too far from the two of you to understand what was going on. Hell, even you could barely understand what was happening.
“Earth to Hyunjae?” you joked, nervously laughing in an attempt to eliminate the newfound tension looming in the atmosphere. “It’s always been Jiwoong, remember?”
For a moment, Hyunjae could feel his mouth drying up. All his thoughts were held captive in his throat, and his lips remained parted as if they weren’t meant to collide at all. He stared at you like you had just teleported in front of him.
“Y/N,” he stated calmly, “he cheated on you.”
Your initial response was to get defensive, claiming that you already knew that because hell, it was your relationship, but then your brain acknowledged the true elephant in the conversation.
“How-...how the hell do you know about that?”
“I- You know word just-…That doesn’t matter. What matters is why in the world—”
“It was a mistake, okay?”
“A mistake?” As Hyunjae’s brows raised, so did his tone. “You know, people—decent people, don’t make mistakes like that.” 
Seeing how Hyunjae was gritting his teeth, how his eyes were locked on yours, built up a foreign frustration within you. Something about the way Hyunjae was behaving felt like he was trying to control you. 
All the rage from before had now returned, yet this time, there was no more leniency from you—not when Hyunjae was being more condescending than he had ever been.
“You know nothing, Hyunjae, so frankly, I really don’t care about what you think about my relationship with my boy-”
“You’re still with him??”
“Look,” you snapped. “Just because you have the luxury of crushing my hopes and dreams on a daily basis, it does not give you the right to dictate what’s wrong or right about my love life and my decisions. Understood?”
And just like how you always are, Hyunjae refused to shut up.
“How is it dictating when it’s common sense to dump a shitty person?” He dropped the bags onto the ground, and not once did he look away from you. “He’s never treated you well either, and you know that—”
“It’s not your decision to make,” you repeated. You could feel the three key elements of creating a fire stir up within you. You had the fuel, the oxygen, and the heat, and Hyunjae was the chemical chain reaction that would set it off. “How dense can you fucking be to not back down?”
“He cheated on you,” he reasserted, and there was a rage in his eyes that you had never once encountered. “He’s done so many shitty things, and he hasn’t changed–”
“Again, none of your fucking business–”
“And I’m pretty sure I saw—”
“I am not going to repeat myself-”
“Can’t you just listen to what I-”
“Drop it.” You were seconds away from yelling at him, ready to unleash all your anger because never once has someone threatened your love life—Jiwoong, the man you considered your soulmate. Your flame had officially engulfed his, and all Hyunjae could do was stare at you in disbelief and disappointment.
Turning to look away, you gazed up into the sky and scoffed, not understanding why tears had begun to pool up in your eyes. At the end of the day, Hyunjae meant nothing to you—you didn’t even consider him a friend.
After moments of experiencing what it was like to be suffocated by a tension so unbearable, you eventually found a way to ground yourself. 
“I can’t blame him, you know,” you whispered, using the back of your hand to wipe away your tears. “We were angry. He just–...he needed an outlet, and at that time, that outlet happened to not be me, okay?”
Hyunjae stared at you, his mouth desperate to say something, anything, to make you see what he sees—a relationship that isn’t meant to be. That you didn’t deserve to be treated this way. Maybe you were no more than an acquaintance to him, but he knew you have always deserved better. 
“He isn’t someone worth fighting for.”
“And that’s none of your business,” you scowled.
“It isn’t right—”
“Stay in your fucking lane, Jae.”
Hyunjae clamped his mouth shut, and the sight of you completely breaking down tore him apart. Possibly it was all the years you spent together growing up, constantly arguing, yet he knew he was always one to look out for you.
You sucked in a cheek, gnawing at it as your chest urged for you to forgive him, to apologize for lashing out without much notice, but in the end, you prioritized your pride over him.
Not only was Hyunjae’s persistence a stab to your heart, but you suspected that Kevin was the one who told him. By spilling your secrets, it was as if Kevin saw the knife that impaled you and yanked it out of your chest, causing you to bleed to your death.
“I’m done with this conversation,” you muttered, dropping the bag in your arms to the ground by his feet. Your plans had changed to you walking home alone, wanting nothing to do with the other two boys for the next hour or so.
When you turned around to walk away, you knew Hyunjae was going to try and say something. You knew him best whenever he was at his worst, so you spun around to face him for the last time that day to cut him off.
“Never fucking cross that line with me again, got it?”
And with that, you left. 
//
Kevin apologized to you the morning after.
He normally drove you to school, and you debated getting into his car when he showed up. Thankfully you chose to do otherwise because the second you stepped inside, Kevin was apologizing profusely. He talked about how anxious he was all night when Hyunjae told him what happened, and he wouldn’t have known what to do if you didn’t forgive him. Obviously you did, and the rest of the car ride was spent with him explaining his side of the story.
According to Kevin, he only told Hyunjae about how you got cheated on because it seemed like Hyunjae already knew. As Kevin recalled the whole scene, you two assessed the signs, such as how Hyunjae didn’t provide any sort of reaction when Kevin dropped the news. In fact, it had seemed like Hyunjae had brought it up to Kevin instead.
Regardless, it became the last of your worries because all that mattered was that you were back to being on good terms with your best friend.
But avoiding Hyunjae felt like lighting a match in the rain. 
It was your agonizing reality for the next two months, and although you could argue that you had gotten closer to your boyfriend during the supposed ‘Hyunjae Drought,’ you were still plagued with him being everywhere around you.
He was in all your classes, and you never truly processed the extent of how involved Hyunjae had always been throughout high school with you. You weren’t on the swim team, but you were stuck with him during meetings for both the broadcasting team and student council. 
Yet it all felt so different.
Unless he was called on, Hyunjae would talk much less unprovoked and would never look at you during meetings. When he would address the entire team, he would glance at you for a split second before looking elsewhere, no longer watching you like a hawk.
You had also gotten quieter because without Hyunjae to banter with, you recognized that you barely had friends in any of those classes either. 
There was no longer a fight between your flames, and you two kept as much distance as possible. You were thankful that there hadn’t been an instance that interrupted that, such as being forced to record more B-roll with him, and you could only hope that the rest of your senior year would remain the same. 
Then you would never have to see him in college.
Now you were back to being the mediocre student that faded into the background. People knew your name at best, but none have ever tried to become your friend aside from Kevin. No matter how involved you tried to get, the closest you were to anyone was a classmate. 
Hyunjae had always overshadowed you too, and for the first time in years, you were detached from his fumes—yet somehow, some way, the smoke from his fire would remain in your lungs, continuing to suffocate you even more than it had before. It didn’t give you that breath of fresh air of new friends or a better life; instead, it helped you realize that you didn’t matter. It was a miracle that you even scored Jiwoong as your boyfriend.
But then that begged the question: why did Hyunjae bother spending his time ridiculing you?
From the very beginning, you had always meant something to him, and you couldn’t pinpoint how or why. When there was no competition in academics, he treated it as if there was. Every time you ranted, he would listen, whether it be about him or something else. Even when you talked about how your chicken from the cafeteria was burnt, he would give you his own before calling you stupid for not noticing until you sat down.
He never shrugged you off like you were nothing or shut you down because your emotions were invalid. He entertained you each time with ease, and most importantly, he knew when to respect your boundaries. Hyunjae was probably the most mindful person you knew and could often tell when you were distressed or needed another form of reaction from him.
He knew when to stop.
Yet when it came to the one instance involving Jiwoong, he crossed the line multiple times. Why?
“Hyunjae isn’t here today.”
“Huh?”
“Didn’t show up for a single class.”
Kevin watched you play with your food with a fork, rolling the cold, barely spherical peas around and into the stale rice.
“That’s not like him,” he replied.
“Yeah.”
“I wonder why.”
“I wonder too.” 
After the driest possible conversation in existence, you sighed and dropped your fork into your tray.
“I need to stop forgetting to pack myself lunch. This shit makes me lose my appetite, I swear. We should call the police and tell them the food they’re serving is illegal and a disgrace to this country.” 
“Keep it away before I lose my appetite too.” 
You didn’t react nor respond to what Kevin said, letting the conversation rot as you pouted at your food. The cafeteria was unusually louder today, making it easier to space out into thought.
Kevin took out his sandwich with a wide grin and started eating, grateful he never had to deal with what the school was feeding thanks to his mom, but eventually his eyes shifted over to you. You were unmoving with your gaze locked onto an empty spot on the table, so after moments of debating between asking you what’s wrong and ignoring you to devour his lunch, he opted to set his sandwich aside and stared straight at you.
“Why are you thinking about him?”
That was enough to garner your attention, your head snapping up to stare at your best friend like he was the craziest person you knew for mentioning Hyunjae, much less suggesting that your mind was wrapped around him.
“What?”
“Hyunjae. With his perfect attendance, a day without him should be a blessing, yet you brought up how he didn’t show up today and then moped harder than anyone I’ve ever seen mope. You should be over the moon, dancing on the tables and stealing people’s food, not-...” Kevin waved a finger at you, “whatever this is. You seem out of it.”
“Well it’s not because of Hyunjae, I’ll tell you that,” you snorted. Your eyes fell back down to your tray, and the more you looked at it, the more nauseous you got. You scrunched your nose. “If anything, it’s probably because of this shit food.”
Kevin rolled his eyes before tearing his sandwich into halves. You perked at the sight and ogled the half Kevin taunted you with. You were about to thank him and take it into your possession before Kevin jerked back his arm, making you whine.
“Throw away your food, then I’ll give you it.”
“Fine,” you grumbled. As Kevin returned to his delicious, most scrumptious, packed lunch you had ever seen, you picked up your tray and walked it to the nearest trash can. As you dropped the whole thing inside, you heard your name being called.
“Y/N!”
You whipped around to check to see who it was and smiled at the sight of Eunseo waving at you. You wouldn’t consider her a good friend, but you knew her well enough since she was the vice president of the student council.
She ran over to you with a stack of paper in her arms, relieved to have caught you. 
“Y/N, hi! I’m so glad I found you. I was scared I wouldn’t because of how packed it is.”
She flashed you her usual glowing smile, and you noticed that she was a bit more giddy than usual, making you question why she was choosing to talk to you in the first place. All your conversations normally took place before, during, and after student council meetings, so this was slightly out of character.
“What’s up?” you asked. As you looked at her, you noticed how her outfit was slightly more put together than it normally was. She had on a cute top that suited her chest perfectly and a skirt that you had never seen her wear. 
“Your outfit’s really cute today.”
“Really?!” Her bright demeanor then faded into concern. “Wait, is it too noticeable or out of the blue? Is it bad?”
“No, no. Not at all!” you reassured. “It’s just the right amount of perfect.”
“Great! God, that means the world coming from you. It’s because!...” She stopped to glance around, making sure that no one was eavesdropping, before taking a step closer to whisper. “It’s because I was finally asked out on a date by my crush!”
She could barely contain her excitement, holding back a squeal with her bottom lip latched between her teeth. Her sunshine-like energy made you grin.
“That’s great! I’m glad you’re making progress.” Your eyebrows pinched as you tried to recall the last time Eunseo had updated you about her crush. “You’ve been pining after him for so long—whoever ‘him’ is, anyway.”
The question of who Eunseo liked had always gone unanswered. She never told anyone, not even the ones who knew her best, but she loved gushing about her mystery crush to everyone she knew. All people really knew, you included, was how down bad she was.
A part of you wondered if it was someone you knew—someone pretty like Juyeon or well-known like…Hyunjae.
“Oh, I wish I could tell you, and maybe I will if things go really well and we become official!” She squealed and hopped in her spot, unable to resist giving you a half-hug with her free arm. “This is so exciting, Y/N!”
“I’m really happy for you.” Your smile was genuine until you thought about why she was looking for you, starting to doubt that she called you over just so she could tell you about her date. 
“I’ll let you know how it goes, swear. But! That aside, I also have something for you.”
You knew it.
Your brows raised, and when you didn’t catch on, she gestured to the papers in her arms with guilt.
“I know this is kind of a dick move, and I’m really really sorry, but I promised to put up fliers for prom today. My date is right after my last class.” Her frown had deepened, and for a split second, you found yourself sympathizing with her because who wanted to let down such a cheerful personality, especially when this was life-changing for her?
“So you want me to do it?”
“Exactly! Please, that would be great. It shouldn’t take too long, too.”
You thought about how you would have to give up an evening of playing on your switch or extra time to study for an upcoming exam, but you knew it was your duty as secretary to help out whenever needed.
Not to mention that it would also make you a decent friend not to hold Eunseo back from her soon-to-be love life despite her poor date planning. If you were in her shoes, you would have wanted her to do the same for you too.
“Sure,” you accepted. “Why not?”
“You’re the best, seriously!” She handed you the fliers as she began to fill you in on the extra details.
“I already told Mr. Barajas that I wasn’t feeling well and that you were going to do it, so he said it all worked out and to not worry about it,” she rambled, happy to give the extra weight (both literally and metaphorically) to you. “I just printed these out, so everything should be perfect to go. Oh, and don’t worry about any extras! Just set them on Barajas’s desk when you’re finished. Hyunjae will also be in 142 with tape ready for you.”
The mention of the forbidden name nearly made every cell in your body halt. 
“What?”
Eunseo tilted her head at you, confused, before finally realizing.
“Oh crap, I forgot! I’m so sorry, I really did forget you guys weren’t on good terms. I hope it’s okay that he’s helping you out. I mean, he’s supposed to, but it was meant for him and me to do it together, not you two, so…God, I’m really sorry Y/N.”
Before you could even react to the newfound information, she continued.
“I really have to go now. Thank you again! I promise I’ll make it up to you!” And with her rosy pink cheeks and a stunning shade of red on her lips, she basically skipped away and waved goodbye to you with a smile, so you reciprocated it with an awkward one of your own. 
When she turned her back, your smile immediately dropped and you sighed heavily.
“Have fun on your date,” you mumbled, your eyes falling to fliers in your arms. As you skimmed the one on top, you noticed it was to promote going to prom while also including a big QR code to vote for who should be your school’s prom king and queen. You expected it since it was the last meeting’s topic of discussion, but what you weren’t aware of was who were listed as nominees.
There were eight names listed under ‘Prom Court,’ and while you expected Hyunjae’s, Eunseo’s, and your boyfriend’s names on it, your jaw nearly hit the ground at the sight of your own. 
//
With every passing class period, your anxiety would kick up a notch.
The dread of talking to the face you had been avoiding for two months engulfed you, and it caused you to develop the urge to ditch your current class to go hunt for Jacob, the student council’s historian. You wanted nothing more than to dump the stack of fliers into his arms, and knowing Jacob, he wouldn’t ask any questions. Hell, you were certain that if you asked him nicely, he would do it for you because of how naturally sweet and endearing he was.
But the guilt of ditching your secretary duties kept picking at your skin, and besides, all you had to do was treat Hyunjae like a colleague. That should be easy, right?
As you suffered through the last few minutes of class and your teacher’s incessant ramblings about the upcoming exam, your thoughts drifted over to what would happen the moment you stepped into room 142.
Hyunjae hadn’t shown up to a single class all day, yet he was expected to set up fliers after school. As your thoughts snowballed, you arrived at the baseless conclusion that maybe Eunseo wasn’t aware that Hyunjae was absent today, therefore someone else (like Jacob) would take over. 
Suddenly, your back had straightened with feigned interest in your teacher’s last few words. Something about Jacob being there instead of Hyunjae had excited you; it felt like you were free and that the universe was listening to your prayers. The gamble of seeing whether it would be Hyunjae or Jacob (or literally anyone else) had your right leg bouncing, eyes on the clock, and when the bell rang, you shot up from your seat, backpack over your shoulders and fliers in your arms, before dashing out of the classroom.
You sped down the hallway to 142, Mrs. Zhang’s room for Chemistry, bug-eyed, before having your delusions crushed at the sight of Hyunjae’s stupidly large height leaning against one of the counters. Your feet stood glued to the ground by the doorway, your eyes locked onto him. 
Covered from head to toe in sweats, Hyunjae was immersed in whatever was on his phone, scrolling through something as his brown curls peeked out from inside his hood. Without any hint of him acknowledging your presence, your shattered hopes slowly began to rebuild.
Maybe if you were quiet enough, you could sneak out with the tape and do everything on your own, avoiding him at all. Actually, scratch that. You didn’t even need the tape. All you had to do was go to another teacher’s room, steal their tape for half an hour, and then return it with ease.
The plan was effortless, and you mentally smacked your forehead for not thinking of it earlier. Right as you were about to execute it, your backpack slammed against the doorframe as you turned on your heels. 
“Nice try.”
You groaned out of embarrassment (and slight pain) and forced yourself to turn around. Hyunjae’s phone was now face down on the counter, and his arms were crossed over his abdomen. His face remained stoic as his eyes met yours, wielding a tension you didn’t recognize.
Now that you could properly look at him, you noticed a few details that you hadn’t before, such as the small tear on his lower lip and the bandaid on his cheekbone. If you looked long enough, you could catch light patches of purple across his skin, and the sight hindered all your thoughts, your brain too occupied with piecing together how he ended up like this. 
“What happened?” you blurted, your gaze shooting up from his lips to his eyes.
Hyunjae staggered at your suddenty, but he managed to keep himself stilled, his brows pinching. 
“What do you mean?”
Even if Hyunjae didn’t mean to, his question became an invitation for your unfiltered thoughts to spill out of your mouth.
“You didn’t show up for any of our classes today,” you began, “but now you’re here? For some stupid fliers? You’re barely dressed properly like you normally are, your hair isn’t straightened, you look pale, Jae, and what’s up with the bruises or the bandaid on your cheek–”
“Are you seriously psychoanalyzing me?” he asked with a scoff. There was no humor in his tone. Instead, it looked as if he was irritated, perhaps even more than you were. 
Hyunjae barely met your eyes, and his arms closed himself off from you. 
“What–?”
“You’re evaluating me like I’m some sort of lab project, Y/N.”
“No, no I’m not,” you rejected. “I’m just saying things are a little off.” You kept your eyes firm on his, even as he pushed himself off the counter with his phone and made his way over to you. “And you know, you really can’t blame me for being somewhat worried when one, you don’t show up, and two, you look like a whole mess—”
“Just hand over the fliers—” he interrupted, gritting his teeth as he outstretched his arm in your direction. You dodged him by turning your body 180 degrees and stood your ground.
“What happened?” you repeated, this time more firmly.
Hyunjae looked at you, a blank expression on his face, before turning back around to grab the roll of tape left on the teacher’s desk. When he returned, he shoved it into your arms while simultaneously stealing half the stack. You protested with an exclaimed ‘Hey!’ yet he didn’t bat an eye and skimmed over the contents of the flier on top.
Bothered by his lack of response, you frowned and made sure to block the doorway, refusing to let him leave until you received answers.
“Why are you acting like this? Pretending that I’m not even—”
“I’ll do upstairs, you do downstairs,” he muttered.
“Did you get into a fight? Why weren’t you here today? Why are you here now—”
“You’d think you’d know,” he finally answered, pushing past you like you weighed none less than a feather.
Your brain had fully malfunctioned at that point, unable to decipher what he meant as Hyunjae walked off to the nearest staircase. As his footsteps echoed down the hall, you thought about what he was implying yet came to no resolution. Did he assume that you were caught up in your school’s latest gossip? Or that you were the main admin for his biggest fan page on Instagram?
The idea made you snort, and you scowled bitterly at his childish attitude. It wasn’t like you were a complete stranger intruding on his personal life—hell, you felt like you deserved an explanation because of how you were forced to do this with him. 
As you stormed off past the remaining lingering students to the nearest bulletin board, you questioned how you were going to do this on your own. 
You had put up fliers countless times in the past few years yet never alone. Luckily, you had a general idea of where the fliers should go when it came to the school’s hallways, but as you approached your first destination, you struggled with ripping off pieces of tape while holding the stack at the same time. It would’ve been easier with a partner by your side, one who either did the tape ripping or placing of the fliers, but you weren’t desperate enough to fall into the role of a helpless princess in need of her pretty (useless) prince. 
After some trial and error, you found a method that consisted of setting the stack on the ground occasionally so you could rip off pieces of tape. Then you would slap said pieces of tape onto your wrist, having them readily available as you put up a few fliers at a time.
Although slightly time-consuming, it was working well and kept you at a steady pace until you heard crashing footsteps behind you from afar. Without paying any mind to it, you bit back your curiosity in order to focus on the wall in front of you, but then you made the mistake of taking a step back, bumping into the person who was sprinting. 
You lost your balance and fell forward before catching yourself shortly after. However, the fliers had already flown out of your arms, scattering across and down the long hallway.
Ready to curse out the offender for running down the hallway, you were surprised when you saw that it was Eunseo behind you, pouring out apologies while a loopy grin was smacked onto her face.
You steadied your anger and told her it was okay, getting down onto your knees to collect all the fliers. Her ‘sorry’s could only go so far with her smeared lipstick, a dazed gaze, and her hair holding the mold to someone else’s (presumably her crush’s) hands in them, but you still excused her, knowing that she was over the moon right now.
“It’s okay, Eunseo, I promise.” You forced out a chuckle as you crawled to scavenge for the ones that flew a few feet away.
“I really didn’t mean to,” she pouted, but it was shortly followed up with bubbly giggles. “God, Y/N, can you believe this? Oh, it’s going so well! I think I love him, I do.”
“Good for you,” you grumbled, hoping that she didn’t hear it as you continued to move down the hallway, hating how far the fliers had escaped from you. You also hated how she just stood there without intent on helping you at all. 
“I have to really go now. Got volleyball practice soon, but I think I’m seeing him tomorrow too!” She waved you goodbye.
And just like that, she continued running off. 
You stared at how you were only able to collect half the mess, hating how Eunseo had somehow managed to delay you even further from being in the comfort of your bed. You were also salty at how her date was taking place at the school, wishing she could’ve dragged him around while she taped stuff up before getting dick-downed of some sort.
Deciding that she and her business weren’t worth your time, you continued to pick everything up as quickly as you could, wanting nothing more than to go home.
When you finally finished collecting every last flier, you were prepared to get back into the groove of things before feeling your phone vibrate in the side pocket of your backpack. Wondering if it was something important, you took it out and beamed at the idea of it being a new message from Jiwoong.
Dating him felt like falling in love with him all over again whenever he texted. Your heart would pound in your chest when you thought about him and explode whenever he gave you his attention and time. You were addicted to him, especially knowing that he was yours after liking him since middle school.
So to say you were disappointed was far worse than an understatement. It was from a number you hadn’t saved yet always recognized and undoubtedly remembered by heart.
Of course it was Hyunjae.
You had Hyunjae’s phone number due to previous class projects and group chats, but you had never once saved it because you thought he was undeserving of being a contact in your phone. Nonetheless, with how the years have passed and how much his number infiltrates every group chat you were in, it was only fair that your brain had unintentionally memorized all ten digits.
The message he sent consisted of him saying that he was done with the fliers, and you rolled your eyes. Even after the way he treated you earlier, he still chose to let you know and brag about how fast he was. 
You shoved your phone away vigorously, ready to return to your slapping-fliers-on-walls duty, before perking at the sound of footsteps behind you once more.
Automatically assuming it was Eunseo or another student staying after for a club or sport, you were stunned when you heard his voice. 
“You’re not even halfway yet?”
In no fucking universe are you turning around; not for him.
“Go gloat somewhere else,” you snapped. The next flier you taped up was nearly slammed onto the wall, but Hyunjae was left unphased by your sudden outburst. He stood next to you and remained quiet, even when you left to place the next flier a few feet away on the opposite wall.
When he didn’t follow, you sighed out of relief, yet somehow you couldn’t help but peek at him, eyeing his hands that were tucked into the pockets of his sweatpants. He was staring straight at the lopsided flier you had put up, and when you decided you had enough of peering at him, he was back by your side.
 “What are you doing?” you grumbled. He was the one who pushed you away, yet now here he was, glued to your side like how he was two months ago. 
“You’re taking too long.”
“I had a mishap,” you explained, “but that’s none of your concern.” The lines on your forehead bunched up, and you waved him off, bending down to place the stack on the ground. Figuring it wasn’t weird at all, you continued your method of ripping off pieces of tape and slapping it onto your wrist.
And Hyunjae was totally judging.
“You can’t be serious.”
“Just go home.”
Despite being on the ground and sitting on your heels, you could physically feel the heat on the back of your head due to his eyes burning a hole into your skull, and for a split second, you knew exactly what he was thinking.
“I can do it myself,” you explained. 
“What are you even doing?” 
“Can you just go?” You picked up the stack once again as you rose to your feet, doing your best to avoid whatever look was on Hyunjae’s face. He was probably stifling a laugh or keeping his expression smug, but when you did cave and peek, his face was still solemn, his eyes on your wrist with concern.
“You’re struggling.”
“Thank you for your observation, Mr. Obvious,” you retorted.
“Let me do it.”
Taken aback, you whipped your head over to his direction.
“You’re kidding.”
“You don’t even want to be here,” he reasoned through gritted teeth. “Just go, and you can thank me later.”
“Thank you?!” Appalled at his audacity, you couldn’t help but laugh out of disbelief. “Seriously, Hyunjae? You want me to thank you for stealing my job? Again? You can’t be fucking serious.”
“Because you can’t take any criticism ever, or in this case, any form of help, so just let me do it.”
Hyunjae was eerily calm about the whole ordeal, his energy far from matching yours.
“I do take help,” you refuted. “I just don’t take yours, and neither do I need it, too.”
“You’re so goddamn stubborn.” And within a blink of an eye, he had managed to snatch the stack of fliers from you. 
“Hey!” you yelled, feeling as if it was deja vu from earlier (you really needed to step up your defense), and reached out to take them back, but he was quick to turn his body, shielding them from you.
“Give me the tape and go,” he urged, emotionless. The Hyunjae in front of you now was someone you truly didn’t recognize because the Hyunjae you knew would have made fun of you and held the fliers above your head, teasing you for being so weak.
Yet he stood still, creating a barrier between you and the duty that was forced upon you. You didn’t want to be here anyway, yet you were so insistent on making sure Hyunjae wasn’t stealing your work again. You weren’t incapable, and you hated how he always managed to be faster.
Even now, he was miles away from being playful with you, and yet he still had a way to shove it in your face.
“Hyunjae, I swear—”
“Give me the tape, and you can run off to your little boyfriend waiting for you by the entrance.” 
Your lips parted at his words, eyes wide as you worked to comprehend his words. You questioned how he knew about Jiwoong’s whereabouts, how he knew that Jiwoong was waiting and that you didn’t, but knowing that he was serious, you reluctantly gave up and dropped the roll of tape on the ground, forcing him to pick it up. 
You were sick of constantly arguing with him, and even if he was lying about Jiwoong, at least you would be away from Hyunjae. There was no point in fighting for your dignity anymore, not when Hyunjae’s narcissism was insufferable.
By walking away with heavy and quick strides, you hoped he felt humiliated by how poorly he was treating you—how he had always treated you like this.
As much as you wanted it to be true, you hoped Hyunjae was lying just so you had more evidence against his self-absorbed and shitty personality, but alas, you found Jiwoong standing precisely where Hyunjae said he was.
Regardless, all stress and frustrations had lifted from your being, and you called out to your boyfriend with a smile that would make your cheeks ache in minutes. 
“Woong!” You waved your hands with a small bounce in your steps as you rushed over to him.
Your boyfriend’s head shot up, surprised to see you. His utter shock quickly switches to one of sheer happiness, tucking his device away before opening his arms for you.
“Hey, baby!”
You tossed yourself into his embrace, hugging him tight after pressing a quick kiss to his lips.
“What are you doing here?” With your face in his neck, your voice came out muffled, and it made Jiwoong laugh.
“Had to stay after to discuss my grades with a teacher, then I decided to stay back a bit for you.” He cooed and kissed the top of your head, holding you incredibly close. When you pulled back, his hands had moved from behind your backpack to your hips instead, holding them as you stared up at him.
“You were waiting for me?” you asked, eyes wide with stars in them.
“Of course I was, baby.” 
You were radiating, feeling happier than ever. The last time you saw Jiwoong was a week ago, and with your clashing schedules, you two very rarely get the opportunity to make plans. Your hands rested atop his shoulders, and when he pulled you in for a kiss, you smiled.
But then it fell.
Something felt off.
//
If someone were to inquire Hyunjae about who his heart belonged to, your name would be his answer—whether he intended to say it or not. 
Hyunjae had always been considered the school’s favorite. His intelligence may not be up to par with others, but his authority was what made him a prominent member of your high school. Some blame it on his looks, but most were aware enough to know that wasn’t the case.
Hyunjae knew how to think on his feet, and his problem-solving skills outwitted everyone within his grade level. Reaching tranquillity had never been an issue for him, allowing him to be levelheaded while making decisions. He emitted an aura that made classmates truly listen to him and the ideas he shared, and overall, it made him a great contender to lead every group and organization he was in. 
Additionally, Hyunjae’s heart was what won over most people. His lack of vulnerability seemed to be his only flaw, but it was an obstacle he could overlook when it came to empathizing with others. By actively being involved in the community through volunteering and holding fundraisers, everyone could recognize Hyunjae’s devotion to hope for humanity. 
All these traits were what led Hyunjae up onto the pedestal and the public eye, a household name for all families in the district. Titles and awards naturally gravitated towards him throughout the years, resulting in him winning the vote as president of your school’s student council and enough scholarships to provide him a full ride at most universities.
It was safe to say that competition against Lee Hyunjae was sparse, and you were no different. 
Your grades would teeter around his standard, hence how you two collectively ended up in the same classes, but aside from that, you had nothing else that could compare to what he was capable of.
Except for one thing; your fury.
There was an inferno inside you at all times, and instead of your body shielding off your heart with steel, people around you would come to find out that your heart was the reason for that large blaze of fire, possessing a passion unlike any other. 
Hyunjae had never once seen a peer with as much fight as you. It was a trait only you encapsulated, one that you weren’t afraid to express. You stood up for yourself and your beliefs, and it was easy to pick fights with him when he had been troubling you from the very moment you two were assigned to sit next to each other in seventh-grade algebra. 
Hyunjae yearned for you ever since, his only want being your attention. You gave him the drive to succeed in high school and thrive in his senior year, and he was positive that he wouldn’t be doing this well without a reason to show off in front of you. He wanted your praise, your acknowledgment, but he loved the chase the most. 
Unfortunately, that was the exact reason he ended up here.
The chase was what made him fall for every part of you, wanting nothing more than your lips on his and the ability to have you by his side at all times, but it was also what landed you with your current boyfriend.
It was like his life was a video game with God giving him the hardest difficulty setting by making sure you were obsessed with someone undeserving of all that he wanted. There wasn’t even a chance of you two possibly being friends in your eyes. Meanwhile, Hyunjae would argue that you two had more chemistry than any other couple in your class, but that hope was crushed, shredded, and stomped on when he found out you still devoted your love to Jiwoong.
Regardless, it didn’t change who you were as a person. Your heart was still just as large and beautiful, and your drive to succeed hadn’t lessened. The bickering never faltered, and it wasn’t like Hyunjae was opposed whenever you expressed disgust at the thought of him being turned on because of you (and that was because he found the idea of you thinking about him hot—yes, his expectations were that low). 
So it was why after two months of almost zero to no contact, you treating him as if those months didn’t exist created the largest dilemma he had ever faced. He spent the next week thinking about your intentions and why you seemed to care so much, specifically right after when Hyunjae had willed himself to believe that he meant jackshit to you. You effortlessly toyed with his heart, leaving him in everlasting misery, while you seemed to do completely fine.
What was a typical and ideal lifestyle for you was a nightmare and tormenting hellhole for Hyunjae. He didn’t just crave the warmth and comfort from your undying flames.
He wanted to burn.
Insanity engulfed him on the days spent without you, leaving him to wonder why you had to make things extensively worse by pointing out his absence or how he had put less effort into his hair. Why did it seem like the concern you expressed was genuine? Why pretend that you cared for him as much as he cared for you?
He was going insane—so insane that he drove to a college party with three other friends in his sedan on a Wednesday night. 
It was being held by a fraternity he and his friends were far more than familiar with thanks to Jongin, an upperclassman he met in his sophomore year and remained friends with since then. The beginning of the senior year marked the origin of parties and hook-ups in weak sporadic attempts to get over you. 
At this rate, Hyunjae could argue that he was more experienced than half of the current college freshmen class. Getting girls in bed was the easiest part; the hardest part was forgetting about you. From what was a method created to move on from you became one that prepared him for when you wanted sex with him. 
But with your constant longing for Jiwoong, Hyunjae made sure that this party would be different.
Although accustomed to having sex with various women, Hyunjae had never been one to drink. This was a fact about him that raised brows, specifically Jongin’s when he first tried urging Hyunjae with a drink, but tonight he vowed to change that. He was normally their designated driver, but when Hyunjae informed Sangyeon of his plan, the elder was more than delighted to remain sober so Hyunjae could get a taste of alcohol.
“Hey, man! It’s about time!” Jongin exclaimed the instant he found out about Hyunjae’s willingness to drink, pulling a fresh bottle out of the cooler specifically for his friend.
“That’s what I told him!” Sangyeon projected his voice over the music, giving Hyunjae a supportive pat on the back.
Hyunjae rolled his eyes at his friends’ remarks and thanked Jongin for the beer, hanging around by the counter as the three conversed and caught up. The two laughed at the way Hyunjae’s face scrunched up at the taste, Sangyeon shoving him lightly with the claim that Hyunjae was being overdramatic. 
With his earlier mindless decision of tossing on a mesh long-sleeve shirt over his black tank top, Hyunjae had attracted another partygoer by his side momentarily after his first sip. She wrapped her arms around one of his and inserted herself into the conversation with hopes of getting Hyunjae in bed by the end of the night, and crazily enough, he considered it for a moment before feeling his phone vibrate in his back pocket.
Normally it would be something he’d ignore, but it remained persistent, signifying that he was receiving a call. He didn’t know who would be calling at this hour—well, aside from Minghao and his usual complaints about Hyunjae partying as a high schooler on a school night. 
After setting the glass down on the counter to grab his phone, any urgency to intoxicate himself as quickly as possible vanished the very second he saw your name glowing on his screen. With an awkward retraction of his arm and a forced cough, Hyunjae excused himself and answered the call.
“Hello?”
With music pounding inside his ear canals, it was expected that he couldn’t hear anything you were saying. He navigated through various crowds to reach the entrance of the house, his heart replicating the booming vibrations from the loudspeakers as he prayed that you wouldn’t hang up on him.
“Okay, I…I should be free now,” he stammered after stepping outside. The sudden stillness of Mother Nature was a drastic change from the party scene, coercing him to focus on his racing heartbeat and the anxiety accumulating in his tightening chest. He was breathing heavily, both from pushing through people in a rush and also because of you. 
You never failed to render him weak and helpless, leaving him like a puppy longing for their owner’s guidance.
There was a silence, but he could hear your gentle breaths hitting your phone.
“I need a ride.”
Hyunjae blinked, his body tensing up, as the many thoughts in his brain scrambled to make meaning of what you meant. However, it didn’t matter because you hung up shortly after, leaving him alone to revel in your words.
Your bluntness and suddenty made Hyunjae malfunction, his thoughts leading him to question if he had even heard you correctly. Rarely did you ever reach out to him, and what could you need him for? Especially after lashing out at him and ignoring him for two months? Of course, there was that one day a week ago when you two were forced to talk together, the day he was given a one-day suspension, but you two returned to treating each other like strangers like it was natural.
He stared at his phone in hopes of receiving more information, that you’d perhaps call again to reconfirm or say you had the wrong number. He felt like he was dreaming—that the person he had wanted for so long needed him for once, but he couldn’t help but also believe that this may be the beginning of another nightmare. 
But it was you, and Hyunjae was willing to risk it.
After checking his call logs to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating, he rushed back into the fraternity house, thankful he didn’t proceed with drinking any more than he did. 
He found everyone exactly where he had left them (the girl included) and announced his departure. The girl made sure Hyunjae knew how disappointed she was, but that was his last concern as he grabbed the beer bottle and handed it to Sangyeon, giving him a pat on the back.
“Drink up and find an Uber.”
“No fucking way you’re leaving us this soon, man.” Jongin shook his head in disapproval, his forearms resting against the countertop.
“Another time, I promise, yeah?” Hyunjae started walking away, waving to them as his heart continued to thrum in his chest.
“He’s lying,” Sangyeon snorted, taking a swig before bidding Hyunjae a bitter goodbye. “You owe me!"
Hyunjae ran out of the house, his legs making quick and long strides as he ran to his parked car down the block. His newfound adrenaline made him think about what he was sacrificing to be with you. Was leaving the party and betraying his friends worth spending even a second with you? What if you were asking him to drive you and your boyfriend somewhere? Could his heart even deal with being used like that?
But as much as Hyunjae hated it, he knew he was making the right choice. The self-respect he had for himself was buried six feet deep beneath the surface of the earth when it came to you. 
God, he really hoped he wasn’t hallucinating.
For a split second, Hyunjae truly debated what he was doing after getting into his car. He was already driving, but he didn’t know where to go. Luckily, it didn’t take you long to send him a text with your location, and it was a place he was familiar with. 
It was a park that he often frequented as a kid since it resided by his old neighborhood, and he was thankful he knew exactly where to go because he knew he would’ve definitely crashed the car while pulling up your location on his GPS. Hyunjae was doubtful it was the alcohol in his system making his fingers shake and his mind uneasy. He blamed you for his hysteria, one that had developed over years of endless longing. 
Luckily the drive wasn’t long thanks to the roads being mainly void of other vehicles (and maybe he did speed a few times, but he considered it justified). Before pulling into the parking lot, he spotted a lone figure curled up on a nearby bench. A small weight had been lifted off of him, relieved it was just you, and he parked aimlessly while his eyes rested on you.
You seemed unphased by his added presence, your arms unmoving as they stayed wrapped around your legs. The bench you were sitting in was facing away from the parking lot, but with his headlights illuminating the view in front of you, you certainly had to know he was there. 
In an ideal world, Hyunjae would leave his car, join you by your side, and, if he was lucky, he’d pull you into his arms and hold you close against his chest. He wanted to be there for you in whatever way he could, but he ended up being a deer in headlights, too afraid to make the wrong move and lose you again.
He sat there for a minute, watching you, and as soon as he received the confidence to reach for the handle of his door, you were up on your feet. His fingers paused midair as he traced your movements, his arm eventually falling to his side as you approach his car. 
Despite how slow his mind was working, Hyunjae knew to unlock the car right as you opened it (he would’ve died out of embarrassment if he had forgotten), and neither of you greeted the other.
Without any explanation from you, Hyunjae refrained from staring at you like he normally would, but your outfit made it incredibly difficult. It wasn’t much, just an oversized long-sleeved shirt that reached your thighs, but it was far from the usual clothes he’d seen you wear, like jeans and a nice-fitting blouse. For a moment, he believed you had no pants on, but then he knocked some sense into himself, realizing that you were probably wearing shorts that were hidden.
While Hyunjae attempted to keep his composure and respect your boundaries, you were eyeing him shamelessly, once again analyzing every detail about him. Beads of sweat pooled up on the back of his neck, and his hair was straightened yet fuzzy. As your eyes trailed downwards, you noticed how the mesh hugged his biceps, catching every crease that defined his muscles. He was quiet, his index finger resting against his lips. 
Where did he even come from?
And why was he so quick to listen?
You held back your tongue from dumping out your thoughts, knowing your questions would end up unanswered like before. Your body instinctively rested against the divot between the car door and your seat, keeping your distance from Hyunjae. He was meant to be a stranger, perhaps someone you loathed, yet there was an odd comfort that encased you from him just sharing the same air as you.
You cleared your throat, turning your head to look away when he flinched and snapped his gaze towards you.
“Drive.”
Your demand was no louder than a whisper, but Hyunjae picked it up effortlessly and was already backing out.
“Where to?”
“Anywhere.” Hyunjae raised a brow at your answer, and you buried yourself further into his seat, directing your gaze out the door. “Just-...anywhere, Jae.”
The nickname had his throat tightening and his chest leaping, nodding in your direction as he drove on autopilot. With no destination in mind, he strolled through familiar roads, his fingers tapping against the wheel. 
You stayed silent, creating a tension that was unbearably thick, yet none of you felt the need to leave; neither of you wanted to leave the other, even if it meant having to deal with the looming elephant in the room (or in this case, Hyunjae’s car).
After spotting the recreational center from afar and its empty parking lot, he instinctively pulled in. There wasn’t a proper explanation for why he decided it’d make a great destination, especially when it was the place that created a rift in your relationship with him, but it felt right.
It was empty, open, and serene—a perfect place to stay as the moon shined.
Hyunjae stepped out of the car after parking in the middle of it, and when you didn’t follow, he moved to your side and opened the door. He was hesitant but took the risk of offering his hand to you, a warm, nervous smile on his face. He wanted you to know he was there to listen, to be there for you, because, Lord, he would hand you the world if he could.
“I’m not in the mood for walking,” you mumbled, but Hyunjae shook his head.
“We’re not going to walk, I promise.”
Your eyes flickered up to his briefly, skeptical of what he had planned, but ultimately caved. You ignored his hand, and he pulled it back with regret. When you stood there, your eyes on the sky, he closed the door behind you and guided you to the hood of his car.
Without a second thought, he sat on top of it and gestured for you to do the same.
“I sit here all the time. Helps me think.” He leaned back against his windshield, his hands holding the back of his head as he kept his eyes on the sky. When you didn’t move, he started to feel stupid, wondering if you two were better off in the car, but then you joined him. 
You copied his position, staring upwards as your hands rested over your abdomen. 
Hyunjae opted to keep to himself, deciding that he didn’t want to make this worse for the two of you. Instead, he fixated his thoughts on the stars in the sky.
There were only a few, but it was a rare sight due to the constant air pollution in your city, so he considered it a miracle. You, on the other hand, were spacing out in thought, and Hyunjae could tell through his occasional peeks. Without much control, his eyes started tracing down your arms. They then landed on where the hem of your shirt rested, now looking at your bare thighs.
Feeling as if he just reverted back to being the shyest virgin in the country, he gulped and immediately looked elsewhere, trying to get you off his mind despite you being right next to him. His racing heart was all that he could hear, and now he wondered if you could hear it too—if you knew how much you affected him.
And your voice broke the silence.
“How long have you known?”
Okay, maybe his brain did fall out of his skull because Hyunjae had no idea what you were talking about. He turned his head and caught how you stared up at the sky. Your eyes were glossy, holding the reflections of the whole galaxy within them. They sparkled, and for a beat, Hyunjae had forgotten your question, too infatuated with your beauty. 
His silence resulted in you turning your head, gaze meeting his, and that was when he noticed the tears.
“About Jiwoong and Eunseo.”
Your light, your flames, his burning desire; all were gone in a flash.
Your voice was delicate, and Hyunjae knew that with one move, he could break you.
Directing his gaze heavenward, Hyunjae sighed and brought his arms down to rest over his chest. Somehow he was able to feel all the pain you were experiencing, his heart twisting while his stomach churned and sloshed around in his body. He thought about how to respond as he chewed on the inside of his lip, questioning if he should answer at all to avoid hurting you.
But you asked, and as always, Hyunjae delivered.
“I don’t think I ever really knew until last week,” he explained, “but I could always tell.” Suddenly, the fight from a week ago had resurrected, and Hyunjae was forced to relive it all.
The hallways were empty when Hyunjae left the broadcasting room, a backpack strap slung over his shoulder while the other dangled behind him. He was in the middle of scrolling through his emails when he picked up on the sound of Jiwoong’s voice around the corner. 
His footsteps halted, and Hyunjae caught Jiwoong’s fatal words.
“How does tomorrow sound?”
Eunseo’s squeals followed after, and Hyunjae stood motionless.
At first, Hyunjae had no thoughts circulating in his brain, but after hearing their lips collide, he started coming up with solutions, such as interrupting or taking a video to send to you. Unfortunately, before he could act on either of them, he heard footsteps dashing off, practically skipping, as the two bidded one another goodbye. 
Hyunjae couldn’t pinpoint the reasoning behind his upcoming actions, but he knew how to describe how he felt. 
Anger was the first and only emotion to surge up within him, his fingers instinctively balling up into fists. His muscles had tightened while a forest fire ran rampant through his veins, causing his blood to boil. 
Then with quick strides, Hyunjae shoved his phone away and made a sharp turn around the corner, tossing his backpack on the ground after spotting Jiwoong against the lockers. The latter had a dazed look on his face, his lips curled into a smirk as he typed away on his phone, but that was changed once he looked up at the sound of Hyunjae’s backpack crashing against the ground in front of him.
There wasn’t a second in between Jiwoong’s face of surprise and Hyunjae’s arm being raised, and before Jiwoong could react, Hyunjae’s fist had slammed into his jaw. 
It was a blur from there, but Hyunjae knew he had won even after authorities dragged him off Jiwoong’s body. He had received a few jabs in return, but it was nothing compared to the black eye Hyunjae gave him.
The fact that Jiwoong managed to cover it up with makeup the day after was a miracle, and no one in the school knew about the fight since it happened after school. Hyunjae wanted it to stay that way, but a selfish, cruel part of him wished that everyone knew how sick your boyfriend was.
Well, now he was unsure if he was still your boyfriend. 
Hyunjae turned his head back towards you, his cheek meeting the cold metal of his car.
You pursed your lips at his response and nodded slowly. If it were any other day, you wouldn’t have believed him. There was no universe where you’d choose to listen to Hyunjae over Jiwoong, but after a week of investigating and getting your head out of your ass, you found out on your own terms, and all the pieces made sense.
“I didn’t mean to.”
Hyunjae’s voice jerked you out of your thoughts, and as you adjusted to look back at him, you were surprised to still find him staring at you.
“I’m not a violent person, Y/N,” he whispered, an enduring hope lingering in his eyes. He wanted you to believe him, and for once, you did; you truly understood the man you hated most.
“I know, Jae.”
Hyunjae eased at your words, and the two of you fell back into a more comfortable yet aching silence. His fingers drummed against his abdomen, and after a while, he got sick of looking at the same four stars, so he closed his eyes, focusing on enjoying the light breeze instead. His heart was still racing, but it was less alarming. Regardless, he hated knowing that he potentially contributed to how much you were hurting right now.
Maybe if he had done something to prevent it earlier, whether it be telling you as soon as he found out or keeping completely out of your business so you could live in bliss, or, if he wasn’t so scared, he could’ve asked you to be his far before Jiwoong had. Maybe it wouldn’t have changed much, but Hyunjae would never know since he never tried, and now he was going to beat himself over it because now you’re devastated over losing your boyfriend and it was potentially his faul—
You laughed.
Hyunjae snapped his head towards you, his brows raised at your sudden change in mood—but it wasn’t the type of laugh he expected. Your laugh was one filled with pain, and he watched you shake your head, trying to refuse the tears that were rapidly welling up in your eyes once more. You sniffed and wiped the tears away with the back of your hand, choosing to look in the opposite direction because the last thing you wanted was for Hyunjae to see you vulnerable.
“It’s stupid,” you murmured. “This entire thing is stupid. I’m so fucking dumb.”
His lips parted to interject, to tell you that you were, in fact, ‘not dumb,’ but he clamped his mouth shut, knowing that his words probably wouldn’t help. From what he’d learned in the past, you liked it least when he tried telling you otherwise, no matter the situation. 
“I should’ve known. I did know. The whole world knew. Even you knew, but it makes me think, was Eunseo just flocking around, flaunting to everyone that she had a crush on my boyfriend and managed to win him over? I just—I…I don’t know-...” You paused to catch your breath, beginning to choke on your tears as your chest shook, “I don’t know what I did wrong, you know?”
You shut your eyes, allowing the pain to engulf you. You knew fully well that your punishment was to deal with the pain, but you felt like you didn’t deserve it—that you deserved none of this. Why was this a penalty for being in love?
It was humiliating having everyone witness the reality you shielded from yourself, choosing hope and love over the truth. 
“I just never felt more stupid in my life, and I feel even more stupid knowing that I still love him.”
Hyunjae sucked in his lips, gnawing on them as he bit back all his feelings, from his brain shredding to his heart weeping.
“I love him so much that I would let him do it to me all over again because I keep thinking he’d be better. I know he can be better, so why-...It’s just- Why do I do this to myself?”
Tears cascaded down your cheeks, each one leaving behind a trail for others to fall. They started pouring out of you rapidly, soon sobbing at the heart-wrenching pain of being betrayed by everyone in your life, Hyunjae included, because why, out of everyone, was he here for you when he should be the last person who cared?
You always wanted Hyunjae to be the antagonist of your life story, to have him as your biggest enemy and threat, so why was everyone else but him hurting you? Why was the villain of your fantasy taking the role of your knight in shining armor?
And yet, as much as it pained Hyunjae to process all your emotions, his mind wasn’t running correctly; he had you alone for the first time in months. He wanted nothing more than to pull you in his arms and whisper words of comfort in your ears, knowing you deserved it more than anyone, but he also wanted to shake you awake and slap you out of your misery, praying that you’d forget about Jiwoong; that right now, you being vulnerable was his chance to swoop in, to set whatever you wanted him to into flames, as long as if it meant you’d end up okay. 
You sat up because if you lied down any longer, you would’ve started drowning in your own tears. Your sleeves were soaked, and he sat up alongside you, figuring that he should do something about it.
Hyunjae got back onto his feet and stood in front of you. He barely knew what he was doing, but that didn’t stop him from replacing your sleeves with his cold, clammy hands over your cheeks. There wasn’t a time that Hyunjae could recall where he had been this gentle with someone, and when you didn’t push him away, he tilted your head up to look at him.
Even with tears running down your cheeks, you looked angelic as ever. 
Each droplet mirrored a star from the sky, and your eyes sparkled as they stayed locked on his.
“Take me,” you whispered, and Hyunjae’s whole world stopped. 
“...What?” Hyunjae had only intended to wipe your tears away with the pads of his hands, perhaps whisper something along the lines of him being here for you for the night (and the rest of his life, let’s be honest), yet your first words were—no, he had to have been hallucinating.
Your hands trembled as they reached for his wrist, and although you were severely broken, the grip your fingers created was firm.
“Please.”
Like a moth to a flame, Hyunjae admired how pretty you looked, your lips plump and eyes wide, and he wanted nothing more than to take you into his backseat and treat you the way he’d always wanted to, especially after hearing your pleas, but he knew better. You both knew better. 
“What exactly are you implying?” he asked, feeling like you had just inhaled all his oxygen and left him breathless. 
You released his wrist and opted to hold onto his sleeve, tugging on it as you tried to get him to understand you.
“I want it to hurt, Jaehyun.”
Your tears were gone, and there was a hint of dominance in your tone that would’ve had him dropped to his knees in front of you. You were also one of the very few who resorted to calling him Jae, and now his actual name. He favored Hyunjae, but after hearing ‘Jaehyun’ from your lips, his preference had completely made a turnaround. 
But Hyunjae worked to collect his thoughts, fully aware that this was wrong and he’d have to be the bigger person here. As much as he hated himself for giving up the perfect opportunity to have the girl of his dreams, he couldn’t ignore the large concern over your current mental state.
“You’re not thinking straight, Y/N,” he reasoned softly, his fingers reaching up to brush your hair out of your face, and for a second, Hyunjae swore he felt the alcohol kicking in—or perhaps it was you instead. The thought of being able to have you right now, to touch you and press his hands over your skin, to have you as his for just this night, was so intoxicating that he was seconds away from foaming at the mouth.
“I don’t need to think straight. I don’t want to think at all.”
Everything felt hotter and tighter, but he kept his composure, though with his eyes dropping to your begging lips and then your delicate fingers, he knew he was beginning to lose whatever was left of his sanity. 
But he also knew you were using him; you had to be. There was no other explanation. It was only minutes ago when you professed how you continued to feel about Jiwoong—that your heart still belonged to him, and Hyunjae was allowed nowhere near it. He was your backup, your second option, yet that happened to be better than nothing, right?
Especially when he could have you right here, right now. 
“You’re using me.”
Your expression didn’t falter.
“Then say no. Make us go back into your car and drive me home.” Your hand dropped from holding onto his sleeve but that was so you could wrap your arms around his neck, slowly bringing yourself closer to him. His cheeks were flushed as his mind flooded with possibilities of what could happen. Never had you ever wanted him, and he’d been dreaming of a moment like this for years. Your tear-stained cheeks, your pouty red lips—he wanted all of you.
“But you won’t,” you whispered, your breath hitting his skin. Your eyes landed on his lips, now craving him as much as he craved you. You needed a release, an outlet, to justify Jiwoong being better than Hyunjae. Hyunjae was worse in every way possible, and you wanted him to prove that to you. “You’d do anything I’d say, wouldn’t you?”
“What makes you say that?” Little did you know Hyunjae was crumbling inside, completely melting as his fingers grew weak at the idea of your lips on his. His hands, although wary, traveled to your waist, feeling your curves before trailing his hands down to your hips to grip them.
“You love me, don’t you?”
His heart stuttered, all words caught up in his throat, but he knew there was no defending himself—not when he was practically drooling at every move you made; he was hyperaware of the hand playing with the hair on his nape, the way your lips nearly hovered over his, and how your tears glistened under the moonlight.
His entire existence was confirmation of your words, and you knew it.
“You’d do anything for me, Jae. What’s stopping you now?”
There was a stillness as you two stared at one another. He swallowed and pulled slightly back.
He knew better.
“You don’t want me.” He was brokenhearted, a part of him understanding that you’d never be his, yet he wanted you in so many ways, wishing to have your mewls fill his ears and the smell of sex staining his clothes. The bulge in his pants was forming and pressing up against the tight confinement, making him groan. 
He dropped his head downwards, his forehead leaning to rest against yours, as he closed his eyes and did his best to regulate his breathing—repeating in his head and out loud, again.
He knew better.
“You’re using me.”
You both knew better.
Yet with your lips ghosting his and your eyes half-hooded, you were prepared to give into the dark side.
“And I say take advantage of it.”
Hyunjae dived and pressed his lips onto yours, hunger driving his every movement. There was no stopping when he felt your lips curling up into a grin, his hands shifting to wrap around your torso to drag you closer. His heart burst at how perfectly his lips molded with yours, and it seemed as if there was fire shooting up into the sky and exploding—they weren’t fireworks, and the explosion was far bigger and more dangerous. It lit the entirety of the sky, the moon and stars included, into flames, a desire unlike any other.
Your left hand pressed firm against the back of his neck while the other traveled through his hair. Meanwhile, his hands had snuck beneath your shirt and felt for your lower back. Heavy breaths left the two of you as desperation crept through your veins, dictating your every movement. 
The cold touch from his hands ignited your nervous system, every sense activated and overstimulated by Hyunjae as you released a breathy moan into his mouth.
You didn’t want him, but fuck, you needed him.
When you would pull back, his lips would chase yours, and you two fell into an endless cycle. He couldn’t even fathom how you were pulling away for air when you were his oxygen. Maybe you weren’t oxygen itself, but the fumes you emitted had already replaced his need for air, deluding him into believing that you were what he needed to stay alive.
You were suffocating, toxic, and destructive, and he wanted more. 
After retracting from the kiss for the nth time, you turned your head to hold Hyunjae back from continuing. You both were panting, your cunt soaking, and he stared into your eyes like a puppy awaiting their next direction.
“Good boy,” you praised, and he laughed lowly and sheepishly, dropping his head as he processed what happened and the idea of it being potentially over. 
“You’re lethal,” he breathed out.
“And you’re pitiful,” you spat. There was a playful grin on your lips, but those words ignited something within Hyunjae. He raised his head and cocked a brow at you, questioning your genuinity. 
Just minutes ago you were crying over a guy that treated you terribly, and yet here you thought you had the authority to call him weak.
Perhaps he was; he was falling deeper into your pitless trap, enticed with every movement of yours, but he knew for a fact you weren’t any better than him.
You both were sick in the head for falling for people that treated the other like shit, yet your drive, your fuel, to win over the hearts of the people you loved was so strong, and it made you two unstoppable. 
Hyunjae would punch Jiwoong all over again if he could. 
Without a second thought, Hyunjae ducked his head down and ruthlessly attached his lips to your neck, eliciting a gasp from you. He kissed your skin fervently, his fingers teasing the rim of your shorts, and your hands shifted to hold onto his shoulders for support. You found yourself tossing your head back, providing him more room to do as he pleased, that if Jiwoong were to see you with marks on your neck, then maybe he’d want you back. 
“Bold of you to call me pitiful,” he grumbled, sucking onto your neck until a blot of purple began to form.
“But it’s true, no?”
“You’re just as bad, Y/N.” He licked a stripe up your neck and over the mark, and the sensation made you cringe, disgust itching at your skin due to being covered in his saliva, but you wanted more of it. You wanted Hyunjae to treat you like you were nothing, to treat you worse than Jiwoong ever had, so you could direct your blame over to Hyunjae instead of your unknowing boyfriend.
You turned your head and slotted your lips with his again, already addicted to how perfect they were for you. Hyunjae knew the exact way to kiss you, to keep you on your toes, as your slick pooled up in your underwear at the mere thought of Hyunjae touching you.
The kiss was eager, a fight for control, and when Hyunjae didn’t surrender, you raised your knee, forcing your thigh to brush up against his crotch.
He gasped at the sensation and pulled away, bangs hanging over his eyes as he looked down at the sight. You teased him by keeping your touches gentle, but you made sure to keep your leg moving. Nothing intrigued you more than seeing Hyunjae beg or rut against your thigh, further proof of how pathetic he was for you. You gained a sense of ego knowing that he could have any girl in the world, that he has had every girl, and yet he would always come back to you. Now that you had him, it would be harder for him to return to a life without you under him, moaning his name.
You wanted to be his downfall. 
Your nails latched onto the mesh, taking note of how easy it would be to rip the material, before pressing your thigh firmly up against his dick, making him jerk.
“You’re-...oh my god, Y/N,” he gasped, breathless. His eyes meet your devious ones, how you were basically Satan himself, and somehow, someway, he wouldn’t ask for anything different. “You’re playing a losing…a losing- game.”
“What more do I have left to lose?” There was some truth in your words as vulnerability struck you. Your leg then lowered as you regained a slight sense of reality, realizing that you were forcing Hyunjae into being your selfish source of relief. You hated Hyunjae, sure, but you knew this was the last thing he deserved—to use him when he’d been nothing but accommodating to you.
And your sick and twisted plan was that after this encounter, you’d leave him to rot.
Hyunjae didn’t deserve that at all. 
But Hyunjae was already too far gone, too intoxicated, to even consider the repercussions of how he’d end up after this. The loss of contact with his crotch was what had him picking you up from his car, the tips of his fingers digging into your thighs, as he led you to the backseat. 
Your eyes widened, your senses fully back, but you made him like this, and you were going to pay for it. Although scared for about what’s to come, the anticipation had you drooling, your lips pressing fierce kisses onto his skin while he opened the door with you in his arms.
He laid you down gently and crawled over you, keeping you trapped between his arms.
“This is what you wanted, right? For me to tear you apart until you can run back to Jiwoong and justify how poorly he treats you?” 
Your brows bunched up at his words, your legs getting antsy being under him. There was no answering him, not when Hyunjae already knew how you were going to respond.
He brought one of his hands into your shorts and made the aggravating decision to slide his fingers over your underwear, depriving you of contact with his fingers.
Yet even with your underwear being a divider, he found your clit with ease and immediately started rubbing circles into the bud, making you buck your hips with a whine. The friction of the cloth was something you were unfamiliar with, and lord did it mess with you. 
“You want me to treat you how he sees you? Worthless and undeserving of respect?” He flicked your clit and kissed your jaw. “If that’s what you want, that’s exactly what my princess is going to get.”
“Fuck,” you moaned, using your hands to push onto his shoulders and force him down. The drive to ride his tongue was strong, and if he kept teasing you, you would have lost it.
“I know you inside and out, Y/N. I know you better than him, and this is how you treat me.” He sucked in a cheek but ultimately decided to comply with what you wanted. He pulled off your shorts yet left your underwear on, and his brows raised. He wasn’t sure how his fingers had missed the texture of lace, but what you were wearing was certainly lingerie.
You looked down to see why he stopped, and when you realized why he froze, heat rose to your cheeks.
“I wanted to feel pretty,” you whispered, shutting your eyes after turning your head. It was embarrassing, now that you thought about it, but Hyunjae’s heart soared, and he wanted nothing more than for you to know how ethereal you looked.
But he shoved the feeling away, allowing his frustrations to get the better half of him. 
When he pulled off your underwear, he cooed at how your essence oozed onto the material and raised the undergarment into the air, waiting for you to look.
“Did I do this?”
His mocking tone kept you from looking, but your curiosity got the best of you. You were met with the sight of a large wet, dark patch on your underwear, biting down on your lip as you looked at him with wide eyes. If you thought about it, you couldn’t remember the last time you felt like this, or if there ever had been a time when you craved someone this badly. 
He tossed it to the side and his hands massaged your thighs, keeping them spread open so he got a proper view of your core on display for him. The sight truly stunned him, reminding him that this was you he fantasized about and replicated with other girls—no one else.
“Do you normally take this long?” you rasped, tossing your head back against the seat, and Hyunjae rolled his eyes.
“I do you a favor, and this is how you treat me.”
“A favor is a stretch—”
Hyunjae plunged two fingers into your mouth, having them press firmly down against your tongue. He latched onto your jaw and pulled your head forward and up towards him, having your eyes meet his.
“Remind me, Y/N, who was begging for this?”
He dropped your head back down against the seat before you could even respond and used whatever saliva accumulated in your mouth as temporary lube, figuring that your slick would help him with stretching you out. You grunted at the impact, feeling helpless, as Hyunjae finally inserted his fingers inside of you. 
Hyunjae’s fingers were enough to have your eyes rolling, but it was the ring that he wore that stimulated you the most. You weren’t aware that he was even wearing one, yet the cold band against your raging wet heat made you whimper and desperately grasp for his hair.
“Jaehyun, please,” you begged. 
He chuckled and kept his movements slow, forcing you to fuck yourself onto his fingers weakly. When you did, he was in awe at how stunning you looked, how you seemed to be in your own world, and how you were enjoying him. By curling his fingers, a moan was pulled from your throat, making your eyes open as you looked at him. You continued to pool around his fingers, your voice weakly begging for so much more than his fingers and the cold air that brushed against your skin. 
Never had you felt more vulnerable, but Hyunjae never once made you feel like you were doing something wrong, making you cling desperately to him. You forced his face down into your crotch and jerked at the feeling of his nose brushing up against your clit.
“Shameless, aren’t you?” he commented, laughing lowly, but you were too out of it to care. 
“Shut the-...F-fuck, oh my god.”
Your whines had gotten more incessant the more useless he became, his fingers now completely stilled inside of you as he watched you roll your hips with a cheeky grin. He wanted to drag this out for as long as possible, knowing fully well that he could last all night. 
When he took out his fingers, you were yanked out of your bliss and nearly begged for him to put them back in, but before you could get a word out, he had replaced his digits with his tongue. Your slick was dripping onto his lips, and as he dragged his wet muscle up and down your folds, he made sure to collect a small puddle of you onto his tongue to eventually swallow, wanting to savor you. 
“Oh-...Oh my god, Jae—” Your orgasm was approaching, unsure of how it was here so soon, but you recognized the signs from the coil in your chest tightening to losing every sensation to the man beneath you. You rocked your hips continuously onto his tongue, and his thumb attached to your clit, making you see stars with how rapid his movements were. 
He pulled his face back and forced his fingers back into you, and the final curl was what made you reach your peak, your hips in the air as you cried out his name. 
As you came down from your high, you caught a glance of the way Hyunjae was looking at you; to him, you were otherworldly, and it was a sight he’d never forget. He wondered if Jiwoong ever saw you like this, if he ever made you feel this way, and suddenly his admiration had soured and contoured to something of darkness, rid of any empathy as he now looked at you with some form of disgust. 
“All this for me, and you still have the fucking audacity to choose him.” 
The mention of Jiwoong had your eyes wide open, tears reappearing at the mention and while being in your most vulnerable state. Your legs shook from the aftermath, feeling too weak to continue, yet Hyunjae seemed to have other plans.
Instead of shoving his fingers back into either of your mouths, he hovered over you and made sure you saw the way he dragged his fingers around your abdomen, drawing aimlessly over your skin with your essence before dragging a hand up to your breasts, massaging one of them as his other hand rested by your waist.
“Tell me, Y/N, did you buy this for him and never got to use it? That’s why you’re wearing it now with me? Am I your sloppy seconds?”
There was a slight growl under his tone, and while you shook your head subconsciously, he worked to remove your shirt, wanting a better look at your bra, before being met with a necklace you had been hiding; one with Jiwoong’s name.
And Hyunjae took no time breaking it from your neck.
Your jaw dropped, and you snapped out of your daze by sitting straight up, yet as you were about to yell at him for breaking your necklace, he shoved three fingers back into your pussy, shutting you up by having you moan at the intrusion. 
“It looked cheap, anyway,” he muttered, forcing his mouth against yours momentarily to nip on your lower lip, tugging on it so your focus remained on him. 
“That was—he’s mine,” you forced out, gasping at every thrust he made with his fingers, your sweet spot being abused as your hands latched onto his shoulders. You made sure your nails dug into his skin, wanting it to hurt, before pulling onto the mesh, wishing for it to tear. 
“He’s not yours, princess. Tell me, how can you say that when his dick has been up other girls?” With his free hand, he grabbed your face and made sure you were staring straight at him before shoving it to the side. 
“You need to fucking wake up and realize that you can dream all you want about how he’d react if he saw you hopping on my dick, but guess what? He wouldn’t care.” Hyunjae pulled out his fingers and left you alone in the backseat. 
You sat there, a wreck and vulnerable, as you tried to catch your breath. You lay back on your forearms, curious eyes following his every movement.
“There’s a reason he hasn’t left you yet,” Hyunjae explained, opening the front door to his car to grab a condom and his phone. He tucked both into his back pocket before returning to you, bringing your lips to his before continuing to talk within the kiss.
“He’s stringing you along so you can boost his ego. He knows you will always be there for him, and you allow him to use you like that?” 
You wrapped your fingers around Hyunjae’s neck, squeezing it before pushing it away to keep your distance, your frustration starting to grow.
“I’m beginning to think you’re all bark and no bite, Jaehyun,” you muttered, and with whatever strength you had left, you pushed him against the seat and got into his lap. Without hesitation, you started rocking your hips over his clothed dick, hoping your slick would seep in so he could feel you.
He hissed but allowed you to do as you pleased, his grip tight on your hips.
“I-...I think…if you asked me, you’re the one who’s projecting. I’m the one in a relationship, and you’re just a side piece.”
The speed of your hips increased, and Hyunjae felt ecstasy on the tip of his tongue, the confinements of his pants physically paining him the more you continued.
“You’re jealous, Jae. Just admit it.”
You pulled at his hair, loving the absolute control you had over him at that moment, but in one languid motion, Hyunjae managed to push you back down, this time with your stomach against the seats. You could feel your bodily fluids sticking to the nylon, and with how hard Hyunjae was pressing down into you, you were barely given a chance to move. 
With one hand on your lower back, he kept you still as he took out both his phone and condom, making sure to place both on top of your bare skin.
“What’s there to be jealous of when you’re here under me? You want to be fucked stupid? Fine. Don’t fucking complain when you want me to be the villain.” You lurched at his words, refusing to let him win, but you were completely unable to do much damage as Hyunjae kicked off his pants and boxers while still keeping his weight on you.
He then picked up his phone and pulled up the camera, making sure to take a photo of you in his car before clicking record and tossing the phone onto the ground, hoping it was close enough to pick up on your sweet noises. 
“Make sure to be loud for me, yeah? I’m sure Jiwoong would love it if I sent that video to him.”
“You wouldn’t fucking dare,” you bit back, your hand reaching out in an attempt to grab the device, but Hyunjae was quicker to grab your wrist, pinning it behind your back. 
“I wouldn’t because I know how to appreciate what’s mine.” Hyunjae released his hold on you to roll on the condom, giving you the opportunity to move and take his phone as you pleased. To your dismay, there was no more effort left within you, only an ache to feel Hyunjae inside you. 
“He appreciates me,” you mumbled, trying to convince yourself otherwise as you waited.
“Does he record you? Jerk off to your moans every night? Because I would, Y/N, just for you.” His voice was now by your ear, and when you turned your head to look at him, he pulled you into another hungry kiss, his dick now grazing against your hole. 
“You’re fucking insane,” you bit back into the kiss, and he grinned against your lips, guiding his dick into you as he spoke.
“Psychotic, just for my princess.”
Venom laced his voice, dripping menacingly, and the insertion of his tip had you grasping for something in front of you, anything, and it was only then that you were able to process how thick his cock was.
“Can you take it?” he asked, his voice slightly softer than before. When you gave him a curt nod, he continued pushing in further. Maybe lube should’ve been an option, but you were so wet for him that it didn’t matter, knowing that the stretch probably would have hurt regardless. 
“Fuck, fuck—he really doesn’t know what he’s missing,” Hyunjae gasped, his head resting against the back of yours. It was better than anything he’d dreamed of, better than any girl he imagined, because it was you, and your body was made for him.
“When was the last time he fucked you?” He was fully inside of you now, and when you didn’t answer, he decided to take it as a sign to move. With a firm grip on your waist, he pulled out just to slam back in, making you yell as you clawed at the seat, wishing there was something to bite on as you endured the pain that was quick to morph into pleasure. 
Every glide pushed you further into the car, your forearms occasionally hitting the door, as his hips moved vigorously, working up to a pace that had you moaning without pause. Tears were flowing down your cheeks at the overwhelming pleasure of being manhandled—of being Hyunjae’s rag doll when he was meant to be yours, and your body seized up, being worked up to your orgasm once more with how precise each thrust seemed to be. 
He adjusted to raise one of your legs to his hip, giving him a new angle to pound into you as he worships you with his dick, and you shook out of pleasure, whining as you saw white and reached your second orgasm for the night. You pulsated around his cock, strangled moans ripping from your throat as tears mixed with your drool by your chin.
And Hyunjae showed no signs of stopping.
He made sure to press your face down against the seats, wanting every liquid to fall and stain his car, giving him something to remember you by.
Oh, and there was the recording too.
While kneeling inside of the cramped car, he slowed his movements and inclined his torso towards you. In one swift motion, he wrapped his arm around your neck and pulled you up, locking you inside his elbow as he forced you to look into your reflection in the car window.
“Look at you, the school’s favorite slut. What happens if the recording drops? The whole school would know you’re mine, wouldn’t they?” He pressed his chest against your back, the mesh rubbing against your skin as his lips remained near your ear, forcing you to listen to every word.
You limped against him, your flames completely burnt out, and your fingers tugged onto the mesh around his arm, successfully ripping it after some time, but Hyunjae seemed unphased. In fact, it turned him on even more knowing that he had you locked in, that you were his.
“Look at your pretty cunt taking me in so well. It was so wet for me, wasn’t it? It still is. And guess what? You’re in my car. You belong to me, and my good girl is only now just finding out about it, isn’t she?” 
“I-I’m…I’m not-...not yours,” you retaliated, creating red angry marks into his skin with your nails as you endured being used, stifling your moans as you looked at how wrecked you were, how bare you seemed to be compared to Hyunjae. You were much more of a mess, from your hair to the bruises on your neck. Your pussy kept tightening up around his dick, convulsing occasionally with every hit toward your g-spot, and you held onto Hyunjae each time. 
Your head drooped down, thinking about how your heart ached for Jiwoong, yet the rest of your body was meant for Hyunjae.
“Whose fucking dick is inside of you right now?” He scoffed and pulled on your hair, forcing your head back up so he could directly speak into your ear. “Wake up, Y/N,” he demanded. “You’re mine.”
He dropped you back onto the seat like you were nothing, leaving you completely helpless, your throat void of any words as your eyes closed and met the back of your skull, too fucked out to communicate. You tried reaching for the door handle, just something to hold onto, yet you couldn’t.
“You tell me I’m pitiful, that I’m basically delusional when you’re going to be the reason my car will smell like sex for weeks.”
Your face was forced back into the puddle of liquid you created earlier, being shifted back and forth against the seat as if you were made for his dick and not vice versa.
“It’s crazy how pathetic you are, how willing you are to break yourself down in front of everyone just to have him. That-...fuck…that you’re so convinced he wants you and you two are soulmates.” He dragged his fingers through your hair and grabbed your roots. “You called me, you wanted me, and I have you right now, moaning my name, and you have nothing.”
Something about his words kept bringing out your orgasms, each thrust adding to the pleasure immensely. You didn’t know how much you could handle—afraid you may pass out from how much he was using you, from his tight grip around you to his dick hitting inside of you mercilessly.
Hyunjae whispering ‘I won, Y/N’ was what had you losing it, your high this time ending up stronger than the rest. You were fully crying now, and yet he continued as if you were nothing.
He peppered your shoulder with kisses and had the slight decency to slow his pace, but he also took note of your sobs.
“Don’t tell me you still want him,” he began rambling, his lips still on your shoulder. “Don’t tell me after this that your heart still belongs to him, because if that were the case, I’d make you call him right now. Say you wish it was him instead of me, and that he’s the love of your life while you’re stuffed with my dick. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”
You could no longer think, and what you hated most was how reactive your body was—how you were just able to come for the third time, but Hyunjae’s dick solely being inside you snapped some other straw you weren’t aware you had, finding that your last high was incoming. 
Hyunjae had picked up the pace by then, and by knowing your body incredibly well, he reached down to your sensitive clit to relieve you. You both knew your fourth was arriving, and you held on tight to his arm.
“J-Jaehy- hyun, I’m—”
“Mine.”
You cried out, your entire body shaking, and Hyunjae pulled out, immediately releasing onto your back with a guttural moan after yanking off the condom. He was forced to catch his breath, watching you float in and out of consciousness.
Your eyes were closed, struggling to breathe through your sobs, and Hyunjae consoled you with a kiss on the back of your shoulder. 
“You’re mine, Y/N, whether you like it or not.”
He then pressed a kiss to your cheek before leaving to grab paper towels from his trunk. You were heaving, still shaking, and left alone as a mess in his backseat, yet with him gone, you felt even more useless, wanting him back by your side instantly. You weakly cried out for him, your nails dragging against the seat in hopes of being in his arms soon, and maybe he was right.
Maybe you were his.
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OUR INFERNO [ M.LIST | TWO ]
NAVIGATION — THE BOYZ
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© https://hcuyk.tumblr.com/
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sungbeam · 9 months ago
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nonidol!kim younghoon x f!reader
neither you nor younghoon were party people, but you did find love in the convenience store down the block.
▷ genre, warnings. friends 2 lovers, mutual pining, college au, swearing, fluff, humor, comfort, reader has crowd anxiety, reader has a lot of siblings lol, mentions of math/physics/chemistry/etc sorry it was necessary for the character, kissing, puns and pick-up lines, mentions of academic stress, lots of carbs haha, drinking, guys younghoon was my first bias and im remembering why
▷ total wc. 29.3k (TUMBLR MADE ME CUT OUT SO MUCH I FKN HATE THIS HELLSITE)
this is the seventh installment of the love in unity series! this should be fine as a standalone, but there are multiple references to party people & i highly encourage u to read it!; all other yns will be referred to as _!yn. (ayc occurs DURING party people)
a/n: in an alternate world, i would still be obsessed w kim younghoon, isn't that crazy. anyways, enjoy + reblog!
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EPISODE ONE (PILOT): OF ALL THE COSMIC COINCIDENCES
KIM Jungwoo's message materialized on your lock screen in a bombardment of photons: Hey, you sure you don't wanna come with us tonight? Feel free to still join :')
You slung the strap of your bag over your head and shoulders before shooting him a reply. No thanks Woo :') Appreciate it though! Have fun tonight <3.
Some of the people in the social circle you orbited were heading to the bay tonight for a bonfire rager to celebrate (read: mourning) the beginning of the new university term. Though you hadn’t seen many of the people attending tonight in a couple months, you were never much for big crowds. Plus, the start of the school year brought a whole dumpster fire of things to worry about, so taking a quiet evening with yourself would be well worth it to keep your head on straight.
With the message sent, you hauled your apartment door open and headed out into the late evening. There was a convenient store at the end of the street a couple blocks over that you had been frequenting since freshman year, and you could taste the sweet brioche buns as the store’s fluorescent lights entered your view. It was a small corner store that reminded you much of a traditional 7/11, except there was a corner inside the store where patrons could eat and chill, and the food, arguably, tasted better than alright.
(The seating area inside this place had definitely seen many of your midterm and finals grind nights. And tears. There were lots of tear stains on those tables.)
Your roommate and good friend Miyawaki Sakura often accompanied you here whenever you came to do some studying, shopping, or recreational snacking. Tonight, she was holed up in her room video chatting with some of her cousins in Japan, but most other nights she would be online playing some kind of first person shooter game.
The walk to the nearby convenience store was a short, yet familiar one. You played a song at a faded volume in your earbuds, your hands tucked into the safety of your pockets. It was a warm night out, as late summer clung onto the coattails of early autumn, leaving a strange mixture of green, red, and yellow in the trees. The streets weren’t barren—plenty of people were out and about on a Saturday night—and still, you tilted your head up to the sky to appreciate the beauty of the obsidian sky.
When you reached the end of the block, you entered into the comfortable embrace of the convenience store. It was quiet, as expected, with only the muffled sound of jazz acoustics from the overhead speakers as white noise. The latter combined with the noise from your own device made it all the easier for you to be unaware of the other people here with you.
Your mouth was already watering from the mental image of brioche, and you made a sharp swerve into the familiar bread aisle when you realized—oh, you weren’t alone.
Standing exactly where you knew the brioche buns were stationed was a tall, lanky man with a pair of earbuds hanging from his own ears, one hand examining one of the bread packages while the other was tucked away in his pocket. His dark colored bangs were shaggy and hung in his eyes, but you could’ve recognized that side profile from a mile away. You’d spent nearly half a quarter staring at it, after all—the other half was looking at his front profile and forehead, but those were just as identifiable.
For a moment you stood at the mouth of the aisle weighing your options. Did you say hello, or did you walk away and pretend you didn’t see him?
He decided for you.
Kim Younghoon glanced up from the bread after feeling your eyes on him for a considerable beat of time. He blinked once before you saw the sharp surprise in his expression melt away into soft fondness. “Well, I’ll be damned,” he chuckled, tugging his earbuds out with a charming smile. “Long time no see, Yn.”
You mirrored his actions and slipped the wires into your pocket. “Long time no see,” you agreed, returning his pleasant expression.
You met Younghoon just last year when he stumbled into the math tutoring center with his head held high and a notebook full of question marks. While your friends on shift at that time (Chanhee coaching someone through their linear algebra worksheet; Jungwoo yanking his hair follicles out with a group of freshmen over trigonometry) were busy, it was you who ultimately became Younghoon’s go-to calculus tutor. For the quarter that he took calculus, you helped the drama major through it.
Of course, finding a drama major in a calculus class was a rare occasion, but you both blamed the university’s awful general education requirement. Either way, you’d both found a friend and good company in one another. It didn’t help that he was terribly charismatic, and often filled the spaces in between long text messages about how to calculate the cross-section area of a vase with “good morning”s, “good luck on your midterm!”s, and corny STEM-themed one-liners.
Younghoon was the kind of guy people took home to meet their parents. Not… not that you ever thought about him like that. It was just what you overheard from this group of girls in the tutoring center once—
“I guess we both had the same idea tonight then,” he chuckled as you came to stand beside him to scour the shelf for your victim tonight.
You hummed. “I guess so,” you said. “I usually don’t see you in this area of the district though.” Because you definitely would have seen him. You lived around here, after all.
“Oh,” he grabbed the back of his neck sheepishly, “it’s a funny story actually. I dropped my friends off at a party and I went to the store near them and they had no good selection of bread.” He made a helpless gesture. “So I couldn’t just accept defeat, and now I’ve ended up here.”
You plucked a package of soft brioche from the shelf, then passed him an amused look. There was something unfair about how the harsh LED lights fell so lightly over his facial features. “I guess some form of cosmic coincidence brought us bread-lovers here.”
Younghoon knocked his bread package against yours like he was cheering a glass of champagne. “And might I say what excellent taste you have.”
That drew a laugh from you. “Ditto.”
He pursed his lips then, considering you. “So what social event are you dodging tonight, Miss Mastermind?” Younghoon’s eyebrows arched upwards at you, and you suddenly took on the sheepishness he had before. Though, you definitely noted that familiar nickname that followed his question. You wondered if that was still the name your contact was saved under in his phone. (If he even still had your contact information saved.)
You raised the palm of your hand up to hide half of your face from comical shame. “Now why would you just assume that I’m here because I’m avoiding a social call?”
“Yah,” he chided jokingly, “because I know you.” His eyes turned up to the ceiling for a moment before he added, “And you’re friends with Kim Jungwoo.”
“Okay, that’s fair.”
He laughed. “Gotcha.”
“And you say I'm the mastermind?” You quipped back at him, all light-hearted. When he first dubbed you with the nickname, you hadn't known what to do about it. He claimed it was because you somehow made learning calculus fun for him—some “sorcery,” as he accused back then.
“You are!” He exclaimed with excited, wide eyes. “You've hexed me with a love for math puns and acute angles,” he groaned melodramatically, clutching his chest like his heart was about to burst for added effect.
You clicked your tongue, unable to hide your amusement. “Acute angles is a new one.”
“'Cause they remind me of a-cute-ies like you,” he said with his hand shaped into a finger gun, tongue between his teeth.
Your hand went over your face again. “I forgot that you did that.”
“You missed it!”
The smile on your face couldn't even be fully covered with your hand. Maybe you did miss it—or maybe it was just him. When the quarter had wrapped up last year and Younghoon was no longer taking calculus, neither of you had any “excuse” to be around each other anymore. Though you still had his number, you always chickened out of texting him to see how he was doing or if he wanted to hang out.
In your mind, Younghoon was always too cool for you. You didn't feel like you fit into his world.
Younghoon took your hand and drew it away from your face, a slow smile filling his lips. “There she is. You missed me.”
“If you stop asking, I will pay for your bread.”
“As if I'm going to let you do that,” he shook his head. “I'll take that as a yes.”
You both began making your way over to the counter to purchase your individual pastries. You always knew Younghoon liked bread, and you shouldn't be so surprised that he drove halfway down the district just to find a specific brioche bun. It was funny and strange how the universe worked. At times you wondered if the probability of fate could be calculated—
“So it's just you tonight?” You asked him as the two of you lingered just outside the convenience store with your freshly purchased breads in hand. You had both immediately torn into your brioche as soon as you cleared the threshold, and the fluffy pastry filled your mouth and stomach with utter joy. It was buttery and sweet and soft… perfection.
Younghoon shoved the piece in his mouth into his cheek. “For the most part, yeah,” he replied, his shoulder lifting in a half shrug. “You?”
“Yeah, Kkura's at home, but she's on call with someone. Jungwoo did invite me out to that big bonfire at the bay tonight, but…” You shook your head.
His head tilted slightly. “Oh yeah I heard about that.” For a second, he didn't say anything, and then he murmured, “Crowd anxiety.”
You hummed, eyes shooting over to his. “Hm?”
“Crowd anxiety, right?” He asked with more confidence. “I—you can correct me if I'm wrong—but I just remember you mentioning something about crowd anxiety last year.”
Your chewing slowed for a moment, and a small smile curled onto your lips. “No, you got it right.” He remembered. Of course, he remembered. A warm feeling made itself comfortable in your chest.
Younghoon seemed to brighten. “Good, I'm glad I remembered correctly,” he said while leaning his shoulder against the wall of the convenience store. “I have a question.”
“Shoot.”
“Did you ever happen to watch that performance of 12 Angry Jurors I recommended?”
Uh oh. You could physically feel your neurons spark at the familiar title. It was the equivalent to a bell—no, alarm—rattling around inside your noggin.
Younghoon threw his head back in a laugh at how your face rearranged into an expression of pure mortification. "You look like I just caught you with a hand in the canary cage—oh my god, you should see your face!"
You were helpless at this point, and no words were coming to your tongue to rescue you. Screw all the differential calculus—where was language ability when you needed it? “I can explain myself,” was all you came up with.
He crossed his arms over his chest, fixing you with a pointed look, albeit still amused. "I'd love to hear this."
“You know that some things just slip my mind—”
“Yes, and that's why I watched you put it into your calendar.”
“And you know that the school has a bad habit of scheduling big events on the same night—”
He cocked a brow at you, leaning forward slightly. “I don't like where this is going, you workaholic.”
You gestured at him with the piece of bread in between your fingers, and he had to cover his mouth to keep from snorting. “I am not a workaholic,” you said firmly.
“Sure you aren't,” he replied back in a tone that indicated he thought the exact opposite.
“Anyways, they put the research symposium on the same night as the last showing—”
“Ah-ha!” He cried with a triumphant finger pointed at the sky. You were convinced that any second now, he was going to start twiddling an immaculately curled mustache. “So you did procrastinate!”
You pressed your lips together as you crumpled your empty packaging, then raised a finger up to scratch your head sheepishly. “Maybe I did.”
Younghoon drew out an exhale. “Aye, I knew it. You know, I think you're just about married to your work, Yn-ah.” His mouth quirked to the side and he scratched the underside of his jaw. “But I guess that's not a bad thing.”
You gave a small wince. “You're not mad I missed the play?”
“Mad? No, of course not. It wasn't my play,” he joked. “I know you have priorities, and me being mad would just be silly.”
“But you are disappointed,” you countered pointedly.
“Disappointed for you,” he countered. “That was a pretty good performance of 12 Angry Jurors. Though… there is one part that I would have chosen to represent differently, but…” He shrugged, letting the thought float out into the ether.
“What is it?” You prompted.
His lip curled upward and he let out a little chuckle. “I'm not telling you; it'll spoil the ending!”
You were unconvinced. “I'm never gonna see the play, Hoon.”
“Not with that attitude,” he shot back.
You couldn't help the laugh that bubbled out of you from his sass that came out of left field for you. The sound of your joy made his smile widen and his eyes narrow into pretty, upturned crescent moons. The warmth all around you wasn't just from the evening's temperature. You'd forgotten just how easy it was to talk to Younghoon, and you decided that yes, you definitely missed him. But with all good things, it was written with a curtain call.
Younghoon seemed reluctant to push off of the wall and away from you. “Well, I shouldn't keep you any longer,” he said. There was a down turned angle to the corners of his smile now. “I do need to go re-find parking for when I have to go hunt my drunk friends down.”
Your laugh was small. “Good luck with that. And… don't worry about keeping me anywhere too long.”
“Thanks, and I'll keep that in mind.” His tongue stuck out between his teeth for a second, his head ducking down to shake his hair out of his eyes. “Hey, you still have my phone number, right?”
“I do.”
Whether harsh or dim lighting, it highlighted his features beautifully regardless. His eyes twinkled. “Now I know you won't ignore me if I send you another calc pun.”
“I'll look forward to it,” you promised.
The two of you were beginning to step toward your opposite directions, but failed to make your legs move any further. “Get home safe, Yn,” he murmured in goodbye. The possibility of him never reaching out crossed your mind. It wasn't like you didn't have faith that he would; rather, it was your own thoughts creeping into your head that you two came from different worlds. Despite the friendliness between you, that was the whole reason you shied away from ever reaching out. It was nothing personal against him.
EPISODE TWO: PASS GO & COLLECT TWO HUNDRED
GRAVITY reminded you of its existence when a bundle of fabric hit you square in the head. (Then again, you were always reminded of gravity’s existence when you thought about it…) “Yah—hey!” You clawed the article of fabric off your head and whirled around in your desk chair with a scowl. “Kkura!”
Sakura blinked innocently from where she stood at your closet, hand on her hip. “Put it on.”
You made a face as you straightened out the garment in your hands, the frown deepening when you realized which top it was. Or rather, which dress it was. “I haven’t seen this since I unpacked my clothes from boxes two years ago,” you whistled lowly. It was a black satin piece, something you brought along with you from home in case you ever decided to go to an event that called for a cocktail dress. Most of the formal events you attended though usually allowed you to get away with dress pants and a blouse. This poor piece of fabric had been relegated to the back of your closet since.
Your friend resumed sorting through your clothes for any alternatives or more of that kind. “I didn’t even know you owned something like that. I thought all your bottoms clung to your ankles unless they were shorts.”
“I have variety,” you sniffed and draped the dress over the back of your chair. “And what's wrong with bottoms going to my ankles? I like when they get to be warm.”
“That's what socks and shoes are for.”
“Says the girl who wears jeans that pretty much cover her shoes.”
Sakura shot you a look that reminded you of when your mother was exasperated, but she didn't want to admit that you were right. “Okay, so maybe we both have problems. But that's besides the point!” She walked away from your closet to sit herself on the edge of your bed, her hand dragging the arm of your desk chair to roll you over away from your desk. “We're going to a party tonight!”
She beamed, waving her hands around. When you only gave her a blank stare, she cleared her throat. “Ahem, I said, we're going to a party tonight! Woo!”
You pursed your lips. “Not very woo, to be honest.”
“You're not very woo,” she quipped in a deadpan.
“No, no, no!” You cut in, waving your finger back and forth. “Don't pretend like you wouldn't rather stay home than party either. And besides, you know that I don't do crowds.” You gazed off into space as if recalling the Great War with glazed-over eyes, already smelling the sweat and booze, and feeling the suffocating pressure in your chest as people squished up against you, and as you lost sight of your friend or anyone you knew for that matter, in the sea of—
“I know,” Sakura pushed out an exhale, and your eyes shuddered as you came out of that headspace. “But I think it'll be good for us. I mean, you need to get your eyes away from that grant application for one second, and I—”
“Need to stop playing League?” You suggested cheekily.
Your friend's scowl coaxed a high pitched wheezing sound out of you. She pursed her lips. “I was going to offer to hold your hand while we were in the house, but I guess not—”
“Okay, now let's not get ahead of ourselves!” You countered. The glint in Sakura's eyes when you interrupted her told you all you needed to know. Damn her cleverness; she'd got you once again.
Maybe she was the real mastermind.
Two hours later—the both of you dolled up and willpower strong (ish)—you clung to Sakura's hand as you and she slipped into the lively host house for tonight's festivities. Sweat already dampened the lines in your palm, and you moved your grip on your friend to hold onto her arm instead. You hadn't been to a house party or a frat party in a while, the last one being a birthday party for one of your friends from differential calculus turning twenty-one.
This instance was different. For one, there were far too many people packed together per square inch. And second, who thought turning down the lights was a good idea? You were already half blind as it was…
“I think we should get a drink!” Sakura shouted as she sent you an encouraging smile.
Your eyes widened as you narrowly missed getting someone's shoulder shoved into your face. “Yes, a drink sounds great!”
It was a war zone as the two of you maneuvered yourselves through the crowded living room space. The only reason people seemed to converge in that room in particular was because it had been turned into a makeshift dance floor. There were also people seated on the stairs, leaning over the upstairs landing, and meandering around in the halls.
You could feel your head begin to fog up as you unconsciously shifted closer to Sakura's side. Your friend curled her arm around your shoulders, deftly guiding you through the fray to the light at the end of the tunnel—the kitchen. There was a distinct lightening of your chest as you stepped foot into the less crowded space. The kitchen was still only dimly lit with the most minimal of light switches flipped on, but it was still enough where you could at least see your hand in front of your face and the light layer of sweat on Sakura’s brow. You made a swift scan of the area and spotted three people over by the kitchen counter, one of whom was slumped over the countertop, dozing off.
Oh, to be him right now.
“Oh, hello,” greeted one of the trio. He was stationed behind the counter like a bartender, his purple bangs brushed out of his face. The girl with him lifted her hand in a friendly wave.
“Hi, we’re not—uh, interrupting or anything?” Sakura said as your hold on her arm loosened considerably now that you were in an area that was much less crowded.
The two of them shook their heads with too much enthusiasm. “No, no! Definitely not.”
You and Sakura exchanged glances of incredulity, but didn’t push the topic any further. With pleasantries aside, the two of you excused yourselves to peruse the display of alcoholic beverages on the island space. You knew Sakura could hold her alcohol a decent amount, and so could you, so you both looked around for bottles of flavored soju to hold you over for the evening.
You dug around in one of the coolers and withdrew twin bottles of strawberry-flavored ones. “Kkura!”
Her blue-colored head perked up and she brightened as you waved your treasures around in the air. “Ooh, yay! You know, I think we should restock our stash of melon soju at home,” she mused and came over to where you were.
With your drinks secured, you each took the first sip like a shot, then linked arms to face the crowd again.
Drinking either made your anxiety rocket or relax—it depended on the beverage and the kind of day you’d had, but as you nursed your bottle for moments longer, the heaviness in your chest began to gradually recede.
The crowd anxiety you harbored was a byproduct of being the middle child of five siblings. You loved your family to bits, but sometimes home life was overwhelming. It wasn't that you got nervous around people, but more so in large bodies of people. The first year or so of your university life spent in large undergraduate lectures were absolute hell; there was an appeal to the upper division classes besides specialized interests.
But your friends were all aware and took good care of you, which you were more than grateful for.
“Is it just me—” Sakura said to you loudly with blue and purple lights painting her features, “—or does this soju taste really good tonight?”
You smacked your lips together as you savored the sweet taste. “You're definitely right,” you said. “We might have to go back for more.”
“If we can remember how to get there,” she giggled.
“Wait, what's in here?” You steered the two of you into a doorway to your left.
From the looks of the massive table stretching from one end to the next, you had stumbled upon the dining room. The room was large enough for there to be a few different groups of people occupying sections, but the largest one took reign over the farthest end. Your eyes widened in delight when you recognized two people in particular. “Oh wow.”
“Yn?” Chanhee exclaimed in disbelief. He was partly hunched over what looked like a board game as his deft fingers counted out paper money. “You're here?”
Everyone—well, almost everyone—turned their heads to see who Chanhee was talking about. Nonetheless, there were still quite the amount of eyes looking at you and you felt your palms begin to get sweaty around your bottle neck.
Younghoon gasped. “YN!” He grinned, lumbering over with his jelly-like limbs, tripping over people's legs and chairs. You could see the alcohol in his expression before you smelled it, but you couldn't just not hug him when he wrapped his arms around you in greeting. You hadn't seen him since last week at the convenience store but even then, the surprise had yet to escape you. What a cosmic coincidence.
“Hey, Hoon,” you chuckled in amusement, patting his back affectionately. You didn't know he would be so affectionate when drunk, but then again, this was the first time you were experiencing him like this.
“Big guy's a little drunk,” Sakura observed, then lifted her bottle to her lips. “Are you guys playing Monopoly?”
One of the guys, who looked the most of sound mind and state, nodded. “Yeah. D'you guys wanna play?”
Younghoon placed his hands on your shoulders with a goofy grin slipping onto his face as he pulled away. “You should play with us! Guys—” he announced to his friends, “—this is my bestest friend, Yn!”
“And her friend, Sakura,” you cut in, gesturing to Sakura with jazz hands.
“And we would love to play,” Sakura added.
You passed her a glance. There was mischief dancing in her eyes. You supposed at least you knew what you were getting into before jumping into any game with the Miyawaki Sakura. These poor chumps never stood a chance.
“Okay, but Chanhee's the iron,” remarked one of the other boys while you, Sakura, and Younghoon made your way over to where they all were gathered.
You snorted at Chanhee's less than pleased expression. “Why does he insist that you be the flat iron?” You nudged your friend. You met Chanhee and Jungwoo in a shared freshman differential calculus class where the three of you weathered the war together.
Chanhee sighed, his tongue poking his cheek. “Because apparently I have no ass.”
“BECAUSE YOU DON'T!”
“NEITHER DO YOU!”
With none of that settled, a good majority of the people present gathered around the Monopoly board on the table to play. You, Sakura, and Chanhee all clambered onto the dining table to sit while the others rounded the end of the table. It also gave you a little room to breathe while playing with such a large group.
“Ladies first,” declared one of the boys, who's name you learned was Sunwoo, his eyes at half mast and cheeks flushed like red grapefruit.
“If you insist,” Sakura sang and did a little dance as she swiped the dice up to roll.
You placed a hand over your eyes jokingly. “Look away!”
Haknyeon blinked with his eyes wide. “Why?”
“Because she's about to win faster than you can say pass go and collect two hundred.”
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In retrospect, you saw this coming. Even if the universe could construct more possible futures than you had atoms on the tip of your pinky finger, you definitely could have seen this coming.
The aftermath immediately following Sakura's utter domination of the Monopoly board left all of her opponents in a sputtering mess. Your friend dusted her fingers off as if there were crumbs on them, a very satisfied Cheshire's cat grin crawling onto her lips. “You can fight it or just accept it,” she shrugged, taking the last swing of her soju.
Eric stared up at her from where he knelt in front of the table, gripping the edge with his palms. He was all wide-eyed and full of wonder. “Teach me your ways.”
“If you get me another soju,” she offered, gesturing with her empty bottle. She probably didn’t expect him to take her up on the offer, because her eyes widened a comical amount when the kid rocketed up to his feet and darted out of the room, faster than she could blink.
“Is he usually like that, so hyper?” You jested to Chanhee as you and he began reorganizing the paper money.
Your pink-haired friend laughed. “Kind of. Youngjae's cute.”
“And what am I, Channieeee?” Came an inebriated Changmin. He teetered over to where you and Chanhee were, then unceremoniously draped himself over the latter's back.
“Ahhhhhh,” Chanhee groaned, “Ji Changmin!”
“Answer my question!” His friend slurred. “I think Yn thinks I'm cute. D'you think I'm cute?” He asked, gazing up with you in a deep pout and puppy dog eyes.
“Don't answer that question, Yn. It's like making a deal with the Devil.”
Changmin scoffed, straightening to a surprisingly perfect posture. He slapped a hand to his chest in offense. “How could you! Chanhee-ssi! We're supposed to be friends!”
You chuckled, leaning out of that dumpster fire of a conversation, and finding yourself in the company of one very loopy bread enthusiast. Younghoon had slipped back from watching the game about three quarters of the way through and slumped into a chair with a can of beer and his phone. At some point, you had given up on Monopoly, too, and considered joining him. Now, you really did move over to join him.
His head perked up when you leaned over and poked his shoulder, a smile coming to his face. “Hi.”
“Hi,” you smiled back. “Tired?”
He gave a slow, drawn-out nod. “Mhm,” he hummed. He lifted the can of beer to his lips and finished it off, then dropped his phone into his lap so he could rest his face between his hands. “I'm kind of hungry.”
You laughed. “I bet. How much did you drink, Hoon?”
“Dunno,” he shrugged.
“Long week?”
“Veeeery long week,” he nodded. “Like…” He spread his arms to his full wingspan, “this much.”
A giggle bubbled out of your mouth at how adorable he was when he was drunk.
Suddenly, he snapped his fingers. “Oh my gosh, Yn! I never sent you the joke I found,” he frowned. “I found it and thought about sending it to you, but then…”
“You forgot?” You offered.
“I just didn't wanna bother you, to be honest.”
Oh. Something in you softened a great deal at the confession. You were always so sure that you would have been the bother, because it was difficult to imagine that someone who seemed so sure of himself like Younghoon might also feel the same. You mimicked his position with your hands holding up your face. “You're never a bother, Younghoon.”
“Even when I ask dumb questions about factoring?”
“There is no such thing as a dumb question.”
He pursed his lips into a line, unconvinced. “You're too nice. No wonder I liked doing math homework.”
You laughed again at the unexpected compliment, and Younghoon smiled to himself. “I'm glad you enjoyed doing your calc homework.”
He opened his mouth like he was about to say something, then snapped it shut with wide, doe-like eyes. “I was going to say a joke, but I realized that I probably shouldn't say that one in particular.”
“Wow, you have a filter when you're drunk?” You teased.
“Hey!” He pretended to sulk. “I'm not that drunk!”
A beat passed, and then he said, “I am still hungry though.” Yeah, definitely drunk.
Within fifteen minutes, you convinced Sakura to accompany you and Younghoon to the convenience store a couple blocks from your apartment. The three of you together managed to snag Chanhee to drive you all, as well as Changmin as an accessory since he and Chanhee lived together. Younghoon had once again insisted on this place in particular because he thoroughly enjoyed the brioche bun from the other day and had been missing it since. You and he settled down at the seating area in the corner of the store with your freshly-purchased bread, while the others traipsed around in search of other sustenance.
Younghoon's cheeks were full of brioche as he muttered a muffled, “You know why I like—calculus jokes?” He swallowed his bite, his eyebrows braiding together as he stared at his now empty package.
You quietly plucked the empty bag out of his hands and replaced it with yours.
He melted at the action. “I do.”
You bursted into a fit of giggles and Younghoon followed straight after you. Your face filled with fire and his bloomed like a blood red rose. The alcohol was slowly settling in. You were a lot more refreshed now that you were outside of the crowd setting, and your chest felt much lighter. “You do?”
“I do,” he reaffirmed, tearing the last bit of bread apart for you both to share instead. “You know why I like—” he hiccupped with the bread half in his mouth. His face morphed into one of confusion, then utter disdain.
You stifled a laugh with your bite of carbs. “Why do you like calculus jokes, Younghoon?” You asked to help him out.
He swallowed his bite. “Because—trig jokes are too graphic and algebra ones are too for—” He hiccupped again, his eyes shooting up toward the ceiling in exasperation.
“Formulaic?” You offered.
Younghoon frowned. “You know this one?”
“I enjoy guessing.”
“Hm,” he grunted, unconvinced. “There is one outlier though.” When he hiccupped for the third time, you patiently waited for him to fill in the blank. “Statistics.”
A small smile wormed its way onto your face. “I have to say, that was very subtle but very good.”
Younghoon beamed with pride. “I knew you would get i—” Another hiccup. He deadpanned. “I hate this.”
You stood up with a chuckle. “Let me get you some water.”
“Thanks,” he pouted. You felt his eyes on you the whole time you went over to the free water cooler over at the counter, and even as you brought him back the little paper cup of liquid.
As he drained the cup, you lingered next to where he sat rather than sitting back down. “Better?” You asked, then held your hand out to take the cup back if he wanted more.
He shook his head though, and he raised it up to his eyes while squinting one of them to aim it at the trash can behind your seat. “How do I get this exactly inside the trash?”
You blinked, eyeballing the distance between his seat and the trash can. The paper cup wasn't going to have a lot of weight while it was empty, but if he threw it with the opening facing him instead…
Younghoon made a noise that sounded a lot like a child's giggle. “Hehe, you're actually doing the math in your head.”
“You don't know that,” you muttered.
“Of course I know that.” He shucked the paper cup and it landed in the trash can with a clean swish sound. He threw his hands in the air. “Woo! Crowd goes wild.”
You laughed and slid back into your seat. “See, you didn't need math to get the cup into the trash can. Nice throw, Hoon.”
He grinned at you. “Thanks. You know how I knew you were doing the math in your head?”
“How?” You humored him amiably.
“Because you get this cute little wrinkle between your eyes, riiiight there—” He leaned forward and booped the place between your eyes, making you go cross-eyed for a split second. “—when you're processing info.”
“Processing info makes me sound like a computer,” you joked.
“Too bad you're not a keyboard,” he said with a sigh, “you'd be just my type.”
An unnaturally loud guffaw came out of your mouth and you slapped your hand over it. There was far too much mirth between the two of you right now. “You're telling me you're good at this drunk, too?” You shook your head, the laugh lingering on your tongue, “Y'know what? I shouldn't be surprised.”
If Younghoon could come up with pick-up lines to remember how to do calculus sober, then you should not have underestimated him drunk.
“Changmin, can you put the plunger down before we get kicked out?” Your head turned toward the sound of Chanhee's pure exhaustion as the three others rounded the corner. You imagined Chanhee dealt with drunk Changmin more than a few times to sound so exasperated. You didn't even want to know what Changmin was doing with the plunger.
Sakura, Chanhee, and Changmin bumbled over to where you and Younghoon sat, the supposed plunger nowhere to be seen. Chanhee brushed a lock of pink out of his eyes with a deep sigh. “Alright; shall we?”
EPISODE THREE: DO AS THE PHYSICISTS DO
THE hungrier Younghoon woke up, the more he likely had to drink the night prior. His stomach growled something horrific and he groaned, rolling his body over to squish his face into his pillow. There were no trains of thought running through his mind at the moment; there was only blissful quiet. And hunger. Goddamn it, he was hungry.
With a huff, he dragged himself upright as if he were rising from the dead. He gave his head a rough shake, eyes bleary as he blinked once… then twice… Oh, yuck. Sticky eyelashes.
There was something white on his desk that caught his eye. There was a yellow sticky note marked with Chanhee's chicken scratch beside it: Yn sent you home with this bottle of painkillers. In case you don't remember, lol.
Dear god, it was coming back to him now.
Younghoon lowered himself down onto the edge of his bed and dragged a hand down his face. Had he been weird? Did you think he was weird now?
His phone was buried somewhere beneath his mess of sheets, and he pulled up your contact that he still had saved from last year. The last message sent was from a brief conversation you both had after his calculus final about what you were both doing when you went home for the winter break. He could feel the warmth creeping up to his cheeks from his neck as he typed out the first message to you since: heyy… about last night…
It was a bit of a surprise when he saw your reply come in nearly straight away.
miss mastermind: LOL good morning, did u sleep okay? younghoon's phone: decently ig 😅 thanks for the painkillers btw i will def take a couple of those miss mastermind: yeah no worries younghoon's phone: how bad was i last night, yn 😭 u can tell me miss mastermind: 😭 u weren't that bad… okay maybe u started singing the calculus parody of bohemian rhapsody on the way to my apartment…
Younghoon snickered into his palm as he stared at the messages on the screen. That memory was definitely rolling back into his head now. It was that, along with the Monopoly game, then the convenience store, and finally, the walk to yours and Sakura's apartment before Chanhee dropped him off here.
miss mastermind: i can't say im too surprised u remembered it tho 😭 sometimes i forget that ur trained to remember things younghoon's phone: that's a funny way to describe being an actor LMAO younghoon's phone: but also i'd be lying if i didn't admit that im so embarrassed abt last night miss mastermind: nooo don't be!! it's all good, i thought u were a very cute drunk
He smiled against his hand. He typed: Well now I just have to make it up to you.
miss mastermind: u absolutely do not younghoon's phone: actually i do younghoon's phone: if i recall correctly, u gave me the rest of ur BREAD. that's like…|
He paused, having nearly written “marriage proposal.” Quickly backspacing, he replaced it with “donating an organ.” Maybe he was a little delusional, but he could've sworn he heard your laugh echoing in his head after he sent it and saw the indicator appear that you were typing. He reached over to grab the bottle of painkillers as he monitored your texts coming in.
miss mastermind: DONATING AN ORGAN… miss mastermind: yk, i knew u liked bread, but not THIS much younghoon's phone: but ofc :0 she's my first love miss mastermind: understood o7 now ik how to sway ur judgment ☝️ younghoon's phone: le gasp younghoon's phone: truly evil mastermind things only miss mastermind: the le gasp is taking me out 😭 younghoon's phone: how abt /i/ take u out instead 😗
As soon as he sent it, he grimaced. Oh no, this was going to be taken out of context. You were going to go through the whole “sorry, I'm not really interested in you” talk, and he would have to sit through it pretending like it didn't hurt—he didn't mean for it to sound like that. You were just friends after all.
younghoon's phone: I MEAN LIKE younghoon's phone: for watching over me and humoring me last night yk! it doesn't have to be something fancy either, just something that we can do as friends! and to say thanks
His grimace deepened. Those clarification texts did nothing to help his case. It also did not calm his nerves when you failed to respond immediately like you had been for the past few minutes. “Well, you've done it now,” he muttered to himself as he frowned down at the screen.
For a couple minutes, there was nothing from your end and he forced himself to drag his ass off the bed in search of sustenance. Hyunjae's door was closed, so the rest of the apartment was quiet as he bounded out of his room toward the kitchen. Periodically (read: every couple seconds), Younghoon would glance at his phone screen waiting for your reply. “What are you scared of?” He said to himself as he opened the fridge and scratched his jaw. “You literally came up with pick-up lines for calculus terms with her.”
There were leftovers from a couple nights ago, and Younghoon grabbed those to heat up. He closed the refrigerator with his hip, eyes darting to his phone, only to see his screen light up. He dropped the leftover container on the counter and scooped the device up.
miss mastermind: i really don't think it's necessary to pay it back or anything, but we can def hang out! miss mastermind: also sorry my sister stole my phone TT but i got it back haha It was sad how fast relief flushed through him at that moment. younghoon's phone: oh no dw abt it lol ur with family rn? miss mastermind: i am! my aunt's in town and so i was summoned home for brunch 🤧 younghoon's phone: …is there :’)) uhm french toast :’)) miss mastermind: *sent a photo* younghoon's phone: that was cruel. miss mastermind: HAHAHA SORRY 😭
Younghoon stuck his leftovers into the microwave to heat up, but was suddenly craving French toast. He knew for certain he didn't have everything to make it right this second though. Maybe he would wake Hyunjae up to go impromptu grocery shopping.
younghoon's phone: i don't wanna keep u away from ur family any longer, but lmk if u have any preferences for what we should do together miss mastermind: no prefs in particular and dw, talking to u helps distract me from the amount of chaos happening in this house :’) miss mastermind: i do have to go now tho unfortunately :l my sister looks like she's abt to snatch my phone again 😭 younghoon's phone: LOL 😭 okay i'll talk to u soon then younghoon's phone: enjoy ur toast :/ miss mastermind: HAHA i'll save u a slice hoon 😋
The microwave beeped its conclusion, and Younghoon pulled the piping hot bowl of leftover food out. As he took a stab at it with his fork, he came to the swift conclusion that he was not going to be full on this. As he shoveled the food into his mouth, he started toward Hyunjae's room to give his friend a very rude awakening. “HYUNJAE! WE NEED FRENCH TOAST!”
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There was no better place than the convenience store at the ripe timestamp of ten o'clock to meet with a friend. You'd gotten back from your house at around four o'clock in the afternoon, so you weren't too tired, though the cleanup and all the social interaction was threatening to take you out. Any school work or grant application work would have to wait until tomorrow.
Nonetheless, you felt a giddy sort of excitement bubble up in you as you hustled yourself down the street to the convenience store to meet Younghoon. In your hands, you clutched a small, sandwich-sized Tupperware container with a slice of holy French toast within. It was your older brother's favorite thing to make when he had to contribute to a brunch (or, let's face it, any meal) spread.
Younghoon had never been tardy to your tutoring sessions last year, so you weren't surprised when you saw him seated at your usual table in the corner. He glanced up from his phone as you walked in, waving. There was a blue colored beanie over his head and a brown corduroy jacket draped over his shoulders.
He noted the container in your hands and his eyes widened like saucers. “You did not.”
“I told you I would save you a piece,” you said sheepishly as you set the container down in front of him and took a seat.
“You—” His bottom lip jutted out. “I can't accept this.”
“You have to. It has your name on it,” you insisted, pointing out the little “Younghoon” scrawled on the side in Sharpie with a smiley face. It was customary in your household to write names on containers if they weren't already color coded or marked with a label. Label makers cost more than Sharpies did, and most of the time, your family didn't mind scrubbing the ink off if needed.
Younghoon's smile was sweet like the pastry sitting in the Tupperware. “I literally made French toast as soon as we stopped texting.”
You laughed. “No way.”
“Yes way! I dragged Hyunjae's ass out of bed,” he told you with great energy, eyes alight as he recalled his late morning antics to you. “I really didn't expect that you would bring me a slice, Yn, you sweetheart.”
“We had lots of leftovers and I just knew the most enthusiastic bread fanatic I knew had to try some of my big brother's toast,” you told him, pleased with his reaction.
He seemed at a loss for words; he just kept looking at you like you hung the stars in the sky, and you wondered how you could replicate this reaction over and over again. “Thank you,” was what he settled on. “I—” He gestured to the container, to you, to the container, “It means a lot.”
“You're welcome,” you said simply.
Younghoon heaved a great sigh and stood up. “Now I have to buy you some snacks—no. Yn, sit your ass down.”
Your eyes widened a comical amount and you plopped yourself back onto the chair.
His lips wiggled as he held back a smile. “Don't move.”
“You don't have to do this, Hoon,” you shook your head as he began making his way over to the aisles.
“What's that rule in chemistry? Energy can neither be created nor destroyed?” He queried from within the drinks aisle.
“The first law of thermodynamics,” you supplied. “It's not just chemistry though. It's relevant in all the sciences.” You weren't sure where he was going with this.
“Yeah, well—” He paused. You couldn't see him from where you were, but even the rustling noises stopped. “Shit, that's not the right rule.”
You bit back a laugh. Oh, he was too adorable.
“What's the one where equal and opposite and…?”
Your brain tripped. “Uh, the—the 'for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction’ one?”
More crinkling. “Aha! That's the one. Yeah, so for your actions, I must do as the physicists do, and react accordingly.”
Younghoon returned to you with an entire treasure trove of goodies that you swore amounted to more than what was due. (That number to you was technically zero, but for Younghoon's insistence, it was slightly over zero… maybe one one-thousandth.) It was a smorgasbord of peach drinks with lychee jelly, potato chips, daifuku mochi, and of course, bread buns. It was a feast in its own right. You both dove straight into the snacks before you. When life gave one lemons, one was to make lemonade.
Younghoon popped a chip into his mouth. “Do you come here often? Is this your hangout spot?” He suddenly asked, then dipped his hand into the bag and waved a chip around in the air, a quizzical kink in his brow. “I mean, you do live close by and you seem to be very familiar with the place.”
You screwed the cap of your bottle of juice back on and wiggled your fingers as you surveyed what snack to eat next. “I do hang out here often—you’re right,” you replied. The daifuku looked very appetizing right about now. “I've been coming by since school started to knock out my grant app.”
He perked up curiously. “Grant app?”
“It's for the Space Grant.” In partnership with the national space organization, your university offered something called the Space Grant, which would grant three applicants with a monetary award that could be used toward their education in aerospace. You'd had your eye on it even before you began attending this school, and you were determined to be one of the three who won it this year.
After you briefed him on the cause of much of your recent stress, Younghoon gave an indulging nod. “Mmmmh, I see. You're still aerospace engineering then, right?”
“Yep,” you chirped. “me and propulsion theory to the end. I guess I'm an airplane kid.” At the latter, you made a face. You were the space version of an airplane kid… the alternate of train kids and car kids…
“Don't think about it too much,” he said with corners of his smile peeking out on either side of where he pressed his fist against his lips.
You tried not to. “How about you? What have you been up to?”
He breathed out an exhale. “Hm? Oh, like, with drama?”
“Sure, anything and everything about you.” You leaned your cheek against your fist and peered over at him. “We've been talking about me too much.”
“Nonsense,” he tsked. “You already know I recite lines, dabble in the hilariously good pun on occasion, and am incredibly obsessed with carbohydrates.”
“What more could I possibly wanna know?” You played along.
“Exactly.” He chuckled then, tongue darting out for a second to wet his lips. “Jokes aside, nothing too much. Hyunjae's best friend, HJ!Yn—she’s a director and writer, and she's putting on her own play in the spring that I'll be auditioning for.”
Your eyebrows arched in interest. “Oh? What's it about?”
“No clue.”
You nodded. “Ah, well, good luck—or, break a leg. People say that, right? It's not just in movies?”
“People do say that, yes,” he affirmed. “And thank you. I'm gonna start a part-time teaching job at a school nearby for their theater program, which I think will be fun.”
“That does sound fun,” you agreed. Because you had two younger siblings yourself, you knew that taking care of young ones was a lot, but if anyone could do it, you knew Younghoon could. You imagined he would do quite well with them. “Let me know when they have a performance!”
His eyes twinkled in the fluorescent lights; you were beginning to grow more accustomed to the way the harsh brightness painted his features softer. “You have to promise to come though. This is more important than 12 Angry Jurors.”
You placed a hand against your heart in playful solemnity. “I, Yn Ln, do solemnly swear that I will try my very best to make it to see their performance.”
He cleared his throat, his expression falling into an expertly grave facade. “I accept your promise,” he said and extended his hand out to you across the table, “shake my hand, and may the deal never be broken.”
You bit the inside of your cheek to keep from breaking out of character as you shook his hand. When you'd both withdrawn your hands, you watched him, fascinated, as he exited out of character. It was like a switch had been flicked off behind his eyes. Crazy.
Satisfied, Younghoon laced his fingers beneath his chin with a giddy, little smile on his face. “I'll save you an aisle seat.”
“I appreciate that,” you said. You really did—and he really remembered.
“And I'll make silly faces at you from the curtain wings.”
You laughed, telling him you couldn't wait.
EPISODE FOUR: TRAINS GO BOOM?
THERE were too many fires to put out at once. You were becoming the humanoid version of that dog in a burning house meme, and you didn't like it. It was not fine.
“Girl, I wish you'd told me, like, three weeks ago—”
You tasted the rejection a mile out.
“—I already committed to this robotics thing that night,” Jungwoo cried in anguish as he threw his head back. “I could've gone to the Space Gala! Instead, I'm watching people play with robots.”
You passed him a sympathetic look. “Robots are cool.”
“But I don't even get to do anything! I can only spectate!” You both stopped in the middle of your walk as he made unintelligible noises and gesticulations. Jungwoo grabbed your shoulders and shook them. “YN! WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE? I have to pay to watch people have fun.”
Your head was wobbling back and forth like a bobble head. Thank god for spines. “Woo—I’m gonna be honest—”
He stopped shaking you.
“I have no idea,” you said to him. “But we are in the same boat.”
The two of you were currently situated on the engineering side of campus. Most of the buildings around you were geared toward the great spectrum of engineering students—from electrical and computer, to aerospace and nautical. You just got out of a numericals simulation course and caught up with Jungwoo coming out of the engineering library to present to him your newest dilemma.
Jungwoo's posture sank. “I only have regrets after pursuing MechE.”
You pursed your lips, lamely patting him on the shoulder. “I told you aero is cooler.”
“I won't dignify that with an answer,” he sulked. Jungwoo picked himself up, however, as he always did. He carded a hand through his floppy brown bangs, eyes flickering down to his phone screen before his eyeballs nearly fell out of his socket. “Oh shit—I’m gonna be late to advanced mathematics. Chanhee is gonna murder me.”
He bumped your shoulder with the back of his hand. “Good luck on finding a plus one, Yn-ie!”
“Good luck getting there before Chanhee,” you hollered back.
Jungwoo threw you an expression that needed no subtitles, but fitting ones would read, That was so unnecessary!
As your friend sprinted in one direction, you began walking in the opposite direction. You had a little more than a couple hours before your next lecture, so you could probably either walk around and enjoy the day's nice weather or find a place to work. All bets were off when you felt your phone buzz from your pocket, and you saw the message on the screen. It was a text from your older sister: hey mom's asking if u have something to wear to the wedding lol.
The “LOL” at the end really downplayed how much stress this was going to give you. The entire event of The Wedding had slipped from your mind over the past week—actually, you were pretty sure you forgot the moment you got back into your car to drive home from brunch last weekend.
If you thought you had a large immediate family, your extended one would silence all thoughts instantly. One of your cousins-in-law was getting married in December, which meant you needed to find an outfit and mentally prepare yourself for the amount of people there were going to be in one room.
The Wedding made you anxious.
You shot your sister a frazzled text back. It was something along the lines of: maybe… lemme check the back of my closet… or pray I have funds in my bank account.
You somehow made your way to one of the green spaces on campus. It wasn't the main lawn that people picnicked or hung out on, but it was still just as beautiful as the main one. It also sat right by the café located down here in the engineering corner; you and your friends liked to loiter around here when the weather was nice.
It was exactly why you thought you were hallucinating when you saw Younghoon walking toward you.
“Younghoon?” You voice incredulously. “What're you doing here?”
He beamed at you, reaching a hand up to cup the back of his neck. “Oh, you know, just taking a walk and enjoying this nice, autumn weather…”
“Down in the engineering buildings?”
He sniffed, shoving his hands into his pockets. “I wasn't purposely trying to look for you or anything,” he said and rocked back and forth on his heels.
You didn't need to know rocket science to read him. “Okay,” you drawled. “Say I believe you.”
“Divine coincidence,” he shrugged helplessly, jovially, even. His eyes were upturned in cute crescent moons. “Oh! And would you look at that—” He swung his backpack around to the front of his body and withdrew your plastic container from its depths, empty and clean, with even his sharpied name scrubbed off. “I just happened to have this on me.”
You sputtered out a laugh and accepted the container from him. “How funny that this pattern of events keeps happening.”
“Pfft, I know, right?” He brushed a hand through his hair. “So, uh, what're you up to?”
“What am I up to?” You parroted. “Not sure, to be honest. I've got a couple hours to kill. What about you?”
Younghoon gestured to the walkway that bordered the perimeter of the engineering lawn. You fell into step beside one another. “Nothing much, too. I kind of just needed a little walk outside to clear my head.”
You sighed, nodding. “I get that.”
“That sounded… very heavy,” he said, passing you a glance. “Something on your mind, Mastermind?”
“Oh, well,” you trailed off, uncertain of where to begin or how to begin. It seemed like Younghoon had something on his mind, too, and you didn't want to give him something else to hold onto. But when you looked over at him, there was a concentrated, concerned furrow in his brow; he was nowhere else but present with you.
You clasped the back of your neck and felt the knot in your muscles. “There's this thing.”
“Mhm.”
“Colloquially, it's referred to as the Space Gala, but it's kind of just an evening prepared by the Space Grant Consortium with a bunch of booths and a Q&A panel—things like that.”
His eyebrows lifted. “Wow, a whole consortium?”
“Yup.” You'd been a member of the student club associated with the consortium since freshman year, not just to keep up to date with information about the space grant, but because you enjoyed attending the events and learning about new innovations related to your desired field. “And it's a little formal where everyone dresses nicely to a degree, and each member can bring a plus one. Usually, Sakura comes with me, but something just came up for her that she can't avoid so—” You made a helpless gesture with your hands.
It was no fault of her own that she couldn't avoid the personal matter that came for her. You just needed to find someone to go with you now, but finding someone on such short notice was proving to be less than swift.
“Ah,” Younghoon said in understanding. “You'd like to attend with someone you're comfortable with because it's a large gathering of people, and—when is it?”
“Next Friday,” you grimaced.
He blinked. “Oh, wow.”
“Yeah.”
Younghoon pressed his lips together. “Hey, I mean, if you're looking for someone to go with—I dunno if you're comfortable with me compared to your closer friends—and I don't want to seem as if I'm inviting myself, but—”
“Younghoon,” you cut in with the knots in your neck and shoulders suddenly dissipating. You pressed your hands together, touching them to your lips. “Would you like to go to the Space Gala with me?”
The most beautiful smile blossomed onto his face then, and you swore to go it was warmer than the sun's beams. For a second, his cheekbones darkened with something bashful, but it was hidden in the blink of an eye, and you were met again with the charming Younghoon you knew well. “Why, there's nothing I would love to do more.”
“You are a lifesaver.”
“Aw, don’t worry about it,” he laughed. “I'm happy to go with you, Yn. I mean, what does Sakura usually do to help you when you're in crowded places?”
Hold my hand. That thought was immediately cast aside. That was probably far too much. You coughed, “Uhm, just—you know—stick around me. I get kind of overwhelmed when there are a lot of people around.”
“Overstimulation?” He offered sympathetically.
“I suppose that's the word I'm looking for.”
Younghoon nodded. “Okay. Hey, that's okay. You just tell me what I need to do to make you feel safe and I'll do it.”
Your heart pounded in your chest and you couldn't figure out the right words to express your gratitude. It was hard not to downplay your own misgivings; it took time to practice being patient with yourself. “Thanks, Hoon. I don't really… know what to say, but I really do appreciate it.”
“You don't have to say anything,” he said easily. “And I think, personally, I'm a great plus one.”
If only all of your troubles in life could be fixed so simply by Kim Younghoon being your plus one.
Your stroll together took you down toward the environmental science building. It was a path through a heavily forested area, though a little strange even being located somewhere south of the main campus. The paved sidewalk faded into a worn dirt path, and sunlight filtered in through the layers of leaves crisscrossing overhead.
“I've spilled my guts,” you piped up, “now what's on your mind?” You added swiftly, “If you're comfortable with sharing.”
Younghoon blew out an exhale from his mouth. “You know that job I mentioned? The one where I'm working with a youth theater program nearby?”
You nodded. “Yeah, how's that going, by the way?”
“I'm not sure,” he admitted with his mouth shifted to the side. “I had my first day with them on Wednesday, and I'm seeing them again today. I think I'm just nervous that they'll get bored of me.”
Ah, you could understand that. Surely your years helping out with your younger siblings could lend some use. It was rare to see Younghoon in this state of unease, and it was even more rare to think of someone who wouldn't like him. Seeing him troubled even a little made your stomach churn, and you wanted to help find a solution. “How old are they?”
“They’re all older primary school kids,” he said. “Young enough to not be scary middle schoolers and old enough to have some kind of attention span.”
You smiled to yourself. “Oh, I know exactly what you're talking about.”
“I knew you would.” He brightened. “You have younger siblings, don't you? Any chance one of them wants to become an actor?”
“Oh, hm,” you murmured, “Sadie's got her eyes set on ballet right now and I think Quincey's really only fascinated about his trains. They can be swayed though, I'm sure.”
“How do I keep a kid's interest though?”
You wish you had a formula for that. You worried your bottom lip between your teeth. “To be so honest with you, kids just like learning about dangerous shit.”
Younghoon wheezed. “What?”
You grabbed his shoulder as you both stopped in the walkway so he would face you. “Listen—no, I'm being serious, Younghoon!” You were trying to get a hold of this man as if you weren't gradually losing it, too. “Do you know how many times my little brother has made his trains go boom?”
“Yn.”
“He has problems, I know; he's like, four and a half or something.”
Younghoon's eyes were filled with mirth as he pressed his knuckles against his mouth. “Yn, do you know how insane that sounds?”
Your eyes shuddered in a blink. “Huh?”
He grappled onto your shoulders with another wheeze, eyes moist with laughter and a twinge of something else you couldn't process. “Yn, are you free next Friday at three?”
“Yeah?”
“Come with me to see the kids?”
“Okay.”
His tongue ran over his teeth as he grinned. Younghoon's head dipped in a nod, and he dropped his hands to the side. You didn't know what the hell just happened, but you had a feeling a solution was very much found.
EPISODE FIVE: TO INFINITY & BEYOND
“PLEASE tell me you're leaving the medieval torture devices out of the discussion.”
You passed him a look from the passenger's side of Younghoon's Prius. (It was objectively hilarious to watch this man fold his long limbs up to get in and out of this car; you didn’t know how the laws of nature even allowed a human with his height to own and drive one of these things.) “You say that like you were sure I wasn't.”
It was currently the Friday following, and the day you and Younghoon would both be each other's plus ones. Presently, you were in his car as he drove you both over to the elementary school where he was part-timing. Once this class was over, you would split off to prepare for tonight's Space Gala before meeting again at the venue on campus.
He turned his signal on as he pulled into the parking lot. “I'm just making sure.” He glanced over at you. “Are you excited?”
“To have about two dozen pairs of eyes on me?” You had faced crowds before and they weren't your forte, but you supposed if they were all bite-sized people this time, it wouldn't be so bad. Plus, Younghoon said they would be sitting down and working in groups most of the time anyways. The appeal of this crowd was that you didn't have to worry about getting swept up.
“They're all nice kids,” he said as if consoling you. “It'll be fun!”
“But I can talk about the trebuchet, right?” You asked after he parked and you were clambering out of the car. That one time you went down a fascinating rabbithole of medieval machinery was about to come in handy.
Younghoon paused with his hand on the top of his door. “That wasn't the one with the horse-pulling, was it?”
“Oh, definitely not.”
He locked the door and the two of you began walking side by side to cross the parking lot. There was a plastic clipboard in his hand made of a material in a shade of translucent neon green, something you expected a PE teacher would carry around, except this clipboard was armed with scripts and instructor notes. The little drama program at this school was currently only an after-school occurrence, but if this all went well, they might be granted permission from the school to start integrating it into everyday classes. It was exciting—you could remember your first years of exposure to things like liquid nitrogen ice cream, egg drop competitions, and the National Geographic issue called Astronauts. Perhaps in another life you would've been an astronaut, rather than the engineer who designed the vessel that would take them into space.
Needless to say, these were some of their most impressionable years, and Younghoon was going to be a big part of these kids’. It made you warm and fuzzy inside.
Sometime between today and last week, Younghoon brought you up to speed on what the kids were currently working on. The head instructor picked out something from an adapted version of How to Train Your Dragon, which in all honesty, was cool as fuck. Immediately, thoughts about how to build a harness apparatus for an actual dragon model came to your mind, but you would need to take a look at the dimensions of the stage and preferably leave flamethrowers out of the end result. That was if you were allowed to or even had the time to.
It would be fun though. Of course it was going to be fun.
Younghoon was the first one to enter the auditorium room. It was a multipurpose building with a large, open concept space lined in carpet with a stage at the furthest end and the doors to the library across the way. With the impending introduction, you stuck behind your friend as he poked his head in. Instant squeals of delight erupted at the sight of him. (He was kidding when he said he was worried about the kids ever getting bored of him, right?) “Younghoon!”
Younghoon’s smile was so big that you could see it even when his face was half turned. “Hi everyone—I brought a friend today. Let’s give her a nice, warm welcome, hm?” Younghoon stepped completely into the room now, his hand coming over to gently sweep you in with him by your shoulder. “This is Yn.”
You raised your hand in a small, awkward wave, a greeting somehow managing to come out of your mouth. There were so many little ones present and they were all sitting in a misshapen blob in the middle of the carpet, their backpacks lined up against one of the side walls. Interacting with children who weren’t your siblings or relatives was a lot different.
“Oh my gosh,” you heard one of them gasp. “Is she his partner?”
“No, she is not my partner—she’s a friend,” Younghoon replied pointedly. “Boys and girls can be friends, Roni.”
There was a boy with a gray colored Lightning McQueen jacket on who said, “That’s exactly what my brother said before he asked his best friend to be boyfriend-girlfriend.”
Well. You angled your head toward your counterpart and murmured to him, “How old did you say these kids were?”
“Now you know why I needed your help,” he joked. “Their brains run too fast.”
“And you think the two of ours can measure up?”
Another small one—she had her dark hair in twin pigtails, knotted off with bows—raised her hand. “Are you an actor like Younghoon?”
“Me?” You pointed at yourself as if there was someone else she could’ve been asking. “Oh, no, I don’t have the skillset to be an actor,” you mused. “I basically make airplanes and rockets.” Basically.
A flurry of excitement kicked up like a snowstorm, and you could feel your skin warm at the sudden increase in energy. Perhaps you should have led with that..? But even so, it was abrupt, and you didn’t quite know what to do with yourself—
Younghoon cleared his throat, “Hey guys, let’s keep our noise level down, please.”
In response to his request, the kids miraculously managed to quiet themselves down to a buzzing chatter. It hit you at that moment; Younghoon wasn’t just good with kids—he was incredible. Why did he ever think he needed your help when you could barely stutter out a sentence about what you did instead of acting?
“I told Yn about the show we’re putting on,” he said with everyone’s attention now settled on him, including yours, “and she was very excited about seeing it.”
“Is she gonna make us fly?” Someone asked with their eyes wide and big, and you swore you could fit the whole Milky Way within the awe that was in their irises. Kids, man.
“Only if you guys do good today,” Younghoon said. “Why don’t we break off into groups and show Miss Yn what we’ve been practicing, hm?”
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You managed to pick out the Star Trek theme over the volume of your hair dryer, and swore loudly as you cut the device off and scurried into your room to find your phone. “Hello?” You answered as you brought your phone back with you into the bathroom.
“Hey,” answered Younghoon, “I was thinking of just picking you up to go to the thing tonight instead of just meeting there.”
It was approximately two hours since you and Younghoon departed from the elementary school. You were back at your apartment now, attempting to get your bearings and clean yourself up for the evening's festivities.
You could feel the gears turning in your head as you weighed your options. “I mean—only if it’s convenient.”
“Okay, I’ll be by at say… 7?”
“Sounds good,” you replied as you finished up styling your hair. Though nicknamed the Space Gala, it wasn’t meant to be incredibly formal like dinner jackets and evening gowns—nice shirts, ironed pants and skirts, and non-sneakers or non-sandals would do fine. “Thanks, Hoon.”
“Mhm!” He chirped to the accompaniment of rustling in the background.
“Also—” You grabbed your phone and flicked the bathroom light off. As you were making your way back into your bedroom, you saw Sakura peer out through her open doorway with curious eyes like that of a cat. She wagged her eyebrows at you knowingly and you shooed at her playfully. “Kim Younghoon, you are such a liar!”
His laugh was sincere and bright. “Technically, I never lied.”
“You are great with kids.”
“Being good with kids is a subjective quality, my friend,” he replied, and you could hear the smile in his voice. “Besides, you did great with them, too. They loved you.”
You pursed your lips in a sad, silly attempt to stay petty, but you couldn’t deny that you had a nice time with him and his students this afternoon. Once the initial jitters subsided, you loosened up a considerable amount. Adults oftentimes underestimated how perceptive kids were, but you had a feeling that they caught onto what made you feel overwhelmed pretty quickly. At least, most of the groups you were working with did.
But… you had fun. That was all that mattered in the end. You would enjoy going back to see them again. You kicked your door closed with your foot. “I had a good time,” you replied at last. “Thanks for letting me tag along.”
“Yeah, of course. It was really fun having you there with me—us.”
You both paused on either end of the phone as the conversation reached a natural lull point. As you fitted on the freshly-steamed blouse you planned to wear tonight, you caught the time at the top of your phone screen. “Uh… so I’ll see you in about twenty minutes then?”
Shuffling from his end, and then, “Yep—twenty minutes! See you in a bit, Yn-ah.”
“Bye, Hoon!”
Twenty minutes flew by faster than 299,000,000 meters per second—at least, to you. One moment, you were ducking into the passenger side seat of Younghoon’s Prius, and the next, the two of you were being admitted in through the doors of the annual Space Gala. The usual “venue” that the consortium booked for this event was one of the campus’s main buildings that housed three large lecture rooms on the first floor, as well as two lecture halls on the second floor across from another large event space.
The lobby was filled with a crush of people, with some faces you recognized and others that you didn't. There were tables draped over with black cloth that hosted educational mini games where one could win free button pins and stickers, booths with companies associated with the consortium present to pitch potential internships, and everything in between. Younghoon stuck to your side like glue. You felt the warmth of his hand either between your shoulder blades or on one of your shoulders as the two of you maneuvered your way through the crowd.
It wasn’t until you hit the farther end of the lobby where there was a clearing of people that you felt the pressure in your sternum alleviate. You imagined your gaze appeared a little empty, glassy even, but it was all just an overwhelming wave of sensations on all ends.
“How’re you feeling?” You heard Younghoon’s voice close to your ear so you could hear him but anyone else around you couldn’t.
You focused on that—his voice. “I’m fine,” you assured him with a small smile. “I’m excited to be here and it’s just a lot.”
Younghoon smiled back at you and you felt his palm warm little circles on your back. “Take your time. The guy at the front says it’ll be another half hour until we can expect the panel to start.”
“Kkura and I—we, uh, usually go in a little earlier than everyone else.” Depending on the year, you and Sakura either occupied seats in the front couple of rows or one of the balcony seats. The former was to distract you from the idea of several hundred other people being in the room behind you, whereas the latter was so you had a large space between you and the crowd. Both were methods that you and your friend deduced were the best at soothing any feelings of overwhelm.
He nodded. “Okay, yeah, we can still do that. Are there any tables you wanna visit before we go in?”
“Actually,” you said, and your heart leapt at the memory of one booth you visited every year, “I have to show you this one thing—it’s so neat. It might be on the other side of the lobby, but we can cut upstairs and get to it that way.” Where there was a will, there was most definitely a way.
Younghoon’s expression mirrored the excitement in yours. “Lead on, Yn-ah,” he chuckled and let you grab his hand to show him why you loved what you did.
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This year was dubbed a balcony year.
From yours and Younghoon’s perch up in the balcony rows, you could peer down at the hundreds of heads below, as well as the presentations given onstage. You were always blown away by the new information and possibilities brought up during the year’s presentations, as well as during the question and answer section where audience members could either line up to ask the panelists their queries directly or send them anonymously to an online platform.
Your preferred method was most definitely the latter because public speaking was not your forte, even though it meant you would have less probability for your questions to be answered. One year, Kkura had practically escorted you up to a panelist when everyone was leaving because you had a burning question.
But this year was different. All of your awe was coupled with the amount of marvel expressed by your partner for the evening. If you were fascinated by what was being discussed below, then Younghoon just entered a whole new galaxy.
You found yourself glancing over at him the whole night to watch his reaction. Periodically, your eyes would meet, and you might have been embarrassed to be caught looking at him, but it was completely dashed away by the pure reverence that was stark on his face.
At some point, the evening did have to come to an end, and you and Younghoon lingered up in the balcony to let everyone else below you trickle out first.
“That,” Younghoon whistled low, “was incredible. I’m so—” He made unintelligible hand gestures before coming up with a word, “—bedazzled. I’m positively bedazzled.”
You grinned. “I’m very pleased to hear that you’re bedazzled.”
“I mean, why don’t we hear about this on the news?” He queried, eyebrows knitted together in disbelief. He reached up to adjust the wiggly star headband on top of his head that he won from a spin-the-wheel stall earlier. “If they talked about finding organic chemicals on faraway planets on the evening news, viewership from my devices would skyrocket for them.”
“Don’t we all wish they talked about space on the news,” you sighed as you leaned your cheek against your fist. “But also, as Dr. Cho mentioned, we can’t get too excited yet. Organic chemicals for us might not mean organic chemicals for an alien species.”
Younghoon nodded slowly. “Right,” he drawled. “That’s so interesting to think about… that we’re possibly not alone and that they could either be very similar to us or very different, or maybe even somewhere in between.”
“Isn’t it crazy?” You couldn’t count the amount of times you got lost in a rabbithole of research when you were supposed to be working on assignments instead. Your eyes darted down to the lower levels to check the population density, and garnered that you could still wait at least a couple minutes more. “Hey, you know, if you're interested in this stuff, then you should come to some of the planetarium’s presentation nights sometime.”
Your counterpart’s eyes widened like the lens of a telescope. “We have a planetarium?”
You giggled. “Yeah, silly. What did you think the astronomy tower was for?”
“We have an astronomy tower?”
You smiled wide against your knuckles as you nodded. “Maybe you should wander down by the engineering buildings more often.”
Younghoon made an incredulous face. “Maybe I should.” He considered something for a moment and you watched the smile blossom onto his face again. “Though, I have a feeling that if I looked into a telescope, I'd only see you—’cause you're a star.”
“That was awful,” you snorted into your hand, shaking your head.
“Not my best work,” he admitted. He could admit defeat when he was met by it, but he wouldn't let it hinder his efforts. “You know, I think Galileo was wrong.”
“How so?” You asked as you motioned for the two of you to start gathering your things.
“You're the center of my universe.”
You were pretty sure the lower levels could hear your laugh echo against the walls. “Oh my god.”
“Or maybe that just makes you the sun,” he said to you in a singsong tone while trailing after you.
“I’m walking home, Younghoon.”
“You can try, sunshine.”
EPISODE SIX: THE ONE WHERE IT GETS WORSE
MURPHY'S Law stated that “anything that can go wrong will go wrong,” with an adage of “at the worst possible time.” You needed to have words with this Murphy.
You were now in the thralls of midterm season. It was common knowledge and experience among STEM students that once midterm season began, it didn't stop until finals hit. You hadn't even realized how fast midterms had arrived until it was pouncing on you like a predator in the brush. You were currently being torn apart by the jaws of a hungry lion called Life.
“I haven't finished the grant app, Kkura.” You stared at the white wall behind your desk with a blank glaze over your eyeballs. There were sticky notes and pieces of paper tacked there with reminders and diagrams like they were makeshift whiteboards, but you weren't looking at them.
“My aerothermo exam is in two days,” you continued on in a droning voice, “and the internship interview is the day after.”
You spun around in your chair to face where Sakura was perched crisscrossed on your bed with a sympathetic frown. The internship addition was a new one. You had sent in your application a couple months ago, and results of applicants who had passed to the interview phase were only recently released. While you were relieved beyond measure that you made it, the interview couldn't have come at a worse time.
“Well,” she began, “we already decided that I'm going to help you prepare for the interview, Yn. The grant app isn't due for another month. All you need to worry about right now is the aerothermo exam, right?”
When she put it that way… “You're right,” you sighed and lifted your hands up to dig the heels of your palm into your eyes. Sometimes it just took an outside perspective to knock a little logic into you.
The Star Trek theme song blared from your phone, and you both startled at the abruptness. You fumbled for the device, then quickly picked up the phone call when you saw that it was from your mom. “Hi, mom. Everything okay?”
“Your brother can't make it to the wedding.”
You made a face. “I'm guessing you don't mean Quincey…”
You could imagine the exasperation on your mom's face from the other side of the phone. “Yn, I call you because you're the logical one in the family.”
If only she knew what pain you were putting yourself through because of your current lack of sense. You leaned back in your chair, eyes fluttering closed for a moment. “Why can't Justin make it?” Justin was your eldest brother who had the divine French toast recipe.
“He's flying to Paris for his culinary school interview. You know I always tell that boy to double check his schedules—he never listens,” your mom exhaled sharply. You could hear the loud clatter of the dryer in the background; she must be doing laundry.
“Sounds like Justin,” you murmured. “So what's the problem? Can't we just go sans Justin?”
“We already RSVP'd with the seven of us, and your cousin already paid for the reception meal in full. We can't have an empty, wasted seat, Yn-ah.”
You frowned. You supposed that would be a problem then. “Why don't we just find someone to bring along as a plus-one?”
“That's what I was thinking,” she replied. “I was going to invite Rian, you know, the boy from next door.”
Somehow, your mood managed to sour further. You and Sakura made eye contact, and she tilted her head to the side in question. You gave her an emphatic thumb's down before replying to your mom, “Wait—can we—mom, can we not invite Rian?” You dragged your free hand down the side of your face, and you saw Sakura grimace when you said that guy's name.
“Why not?”
“Be… because,” you stammered, pushing out a sigh when you weren't sure how to describe your incredible disdain for your childhood next-door neighbor. He was your age, and fortunately, you were never matchmade with him. Unfortunately, he was a jerk with inferiority issues and delighted in competing with you in everything. “He wouldn't want to come with,” you said lamely. His presence would do the exact opposite of soothing your anxiety.
Sakura gestured with her hands. Tell her he's full of shit!
Oh, you wished.
“Yn.” Your mother could smell lies, even through the phone. “I wouldn't know who else to invite.”
“Daphne's partner!” You exclaimed desperately. Daphne was your older sister who attended another college on the other side of the city getting her master's degree. “Can't we invite Sam?”
“Sam's in Vietnam in December.”
“Goddamn it.”
“Yn.”
“Sorry.” Dear fuck, you were slipping. You needed a solution—anything at all. Something to put out one fire, even temporarily. “What if I came up with a plus one?” You regretted it immediately.
“Oh, like Sakura? I wouldn't mind if you brought her.”
Anyone but Rian, anyone but Rian. “Yeah,” you drawled. “That's who I had in mind.” You lifted your head to meet your friend's eyes again, and she knitted her brows in confusion. You mouthed that you would tell her in a moment.
When you and your mom hung up, you deflated in your chair, dropping your phone onto your chest. “I'm fucked.”
“Hit me with it.”
“I told her I would bring you to the wedding with us.”
Sakura sat there for a moment to process the information. “Yn, honey, I'm going to be in Japan in December.”
“I know,” you cried.
“Who are you bringing then?”
“I don't know.”
Murphy of Murphy's Law had better sleep with one eye open.
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It was likely in your worst interest to be at the convenience store at midnight rather than in your bed asleep, attempting to let your brain process the concepts from your aerothermodynamics course. Against your better judgment, though, you were here, slumped over your usual table and seat as you watched YouTube and sipped on a box of chocolate milk.
In the distance, the door opened and closed, but the sound was muffled through your earbuds. Out of your peripherals, someone materialized next to you. You peered up at the tall man beside you now, blocking out the fluorescent LEDs from burning your eyes. “Hey,” you said quietly.
Younghoon took in your state with sad eyes. “I got your text.”
“I didn't think you'd be awake.” Didn't he have a rehearsal tomorrow morning? Or rather, later this morning.
“Well, I'm glad I was awake, for starters.” He frowned and then leaned over you to gently wrap you up in his arms. “Rough night?”
Your face was buried in the fabric of his hoodie. This was nice. “Rough everything.”
“Ah, one of those,” he sympathized. “Do you wanna talk about it?”
“Not really. Thank you for coming though.” You leaned back and patted the empty seat next to you. “Wanna watch squirrels with me?”
You watched his expression falter and fill with surprised amusement with a pinch of confusion. “Did you—you just said squirrels, right?”
“Yeah, they're competing in a backyard Olympics for this trophy of walnuts.”
He sat down with you to watch the squirrels. In your free time, you liked watching engineering or science-type videos on the internet. Most of them were as educational as they were entertaining, like the backyard squirrel series, where this man used his mechanical engineering degree to build advanced obstacles to test and observe the vast capabilities of the squirrel.
You shared your earbud with Younghoon so he could listen, and you were now connected by a wire. He mimicked your position, too, with his chin nestled onto his folded arms over the tabletop.
You weren't sure what possessed him to drive all the way over here at such an ungodly hour of night, but you were grateful for his company, nonetheless. Even if it felt like the sky was falling, you could let this moment in time exist outside the conventional timeline. It could be its own singular moment, just you and Younghoon.
Somewhere in the back of your mind, you wondered how it all came back to this. You'd never thought you were meant to see him again after tutoring him, let alone having spent so much time with him again these past few weeks. If you didn't belong in his world, and vice versa, then what was this?
You swore the monotonous buzzing from the lights above was making your eyelids slowly fall with the weight of lead.
Younghoon's eyes fluttered over to you just as you were about to doze off. He sat up and turned the video off. “Hey,” he whispered, gently shaking your arm.
You hummed, the bags under your eyes becoming worse by the second. “Huh?”
He chuckled under his breath as you put your head back down. “We can watch this another day,” he promised, patting your head. “We should get you home though so you can sleep.”
“Oh my gosh,” you groaned and picked yourself up, “you have rehearsal tomorrow morning—what time is it?”
“Hey, don't worry about it, love.” He was wrapping your earbud wire around his fingers into a neat, little bundle. “I'll be fine. Let's go home, though, yeah?”
You pressed your palms to your eyes in a desperate attempt to rehydrate them. “Okay, yeah. Sorry, Hoon.”
“Don't say sorry,” he cooed, pressing your earbuds into the palm of your hand and tucking your phone into your pocket. “I felt a lot better meeting you here. Do you feel a little better?”
You gave a small nod. Your brain was too muddled, too exhausted, to really comprehend what was being expressed as plain as the sun at high noon on his face.
“Then that's all that matters.” There was a pause. Your vision was blurry for the second that his eyes wandered somewhere else. You didn't know if you just didn't see it or if you just chose to not acknowledge it.
Then the moment passed, as all things did in the flow of nature, and he walked you home.
EPISODE SEVEN: PARTY PEOPLE (BBANGNYU'S VERSION)
“CHANHEE?”
Choi Chanhee swirled the straw of his melted iced americano around in its cup. “Yup.”
“Who would you invite to a wedding?” You posed, twirling around the mechanical pencil in your hand between your fingers. You didn't even know why you still had the writing utensil out—everyone had pretty much gone home for the evening.
He released a sigh indicative of a very tired data science major, who doubled-majored in math. “The person I'm marrying? I dunno.”
You and Chanhee were stuck with the late shift at the math tutoring center on a Monday night. The crowd usually cleared out by nine o'clock, but the two of you weren't technically allowed to leave until nine-thirty. Most nights when you were stuck with this shift, you and he didn't mind the quiet in order to finish assignments of your own.
Jungwoo would have been here to suffer with you, too, but he had an excuse tonight. Something about an emergency at the NCT fraternity house.
You blew a puff of air through your mouth. “Not your wedding; just a wedding. One that you're invited to.”
“You're not inviting me, are you?”
“You don't wanna be my plus one for a wedding?” You grinned.
“Depends…” He hummed pleasantly, “what're they serving?” That was a valid question that you lacked an answer to.
In front of you on your laptop screen sat your incomplete space grant application. After the hell that was last week, you somehow survived it by the seat of your pants. Now, you needed to focus on your two other exams for this week, the wedding debacle, this grant app, and praying that the interview had gone as well as you thought it had.
So many things to think about, so little brain cells.
You glanced over at the corner of your laptop screen to see how much time you had left to try and be productive. From the corner of your eye, you saw the swift movements of Chanhee's thumbs flying over his phone keyboard.
You turned to your application to read over your responses for the ten thousandth time. “Who've you been texting all night, Chanhee?”
“Huh? Oh, my best friend.”
You hummed. “The one that goes to the uni across the country, right?”
His response was cut off by the sound of the tutoring center doors opening. Both of you looked up in tandem, mentally bracing yourselves for—
“Younghoon?”
There was a weird fluttery feeling in your chest as he beamed at the both of you and bounded over from the front doors. “Hey guys! I was just walking past and thought I would swing by.”
Chanhee's eyebrows flew all the way up to his pink hairline. “Yes, because it makes complete sense why you would be meandering around south campus at nine o'clock at night,” he quipped.
Younghoon seemed, to his credit, unbothered by Chanhee pointing out the obvious. He stole one of the chairs from another table and sat down across from you and Chanhee. “You guys don't play any music when everyone's gone?”
“Sometimes we do,” you replied, glancing up from your computer screen before replacing your word choice somewhere.
Chanhee nodded his agreement as he set his phone down on the table and laced his fingers under his chin. “Oh, Younghoon-ah, I've been meaning to discuss something with you.”
Younghoon perked up. “What's up?”
“What're we gonna do about your friend and my friend?”
You figured out pretty quickly that you had no idea what they were talking about. Even after having played Monopoly with some of them a few weeks ago, it still hadn't hit you as to the full-scale of these two guys’ shared social circles. Sure, you orbited some friend groups of a decent size, but it felt like they all hung out with each other at least once a week.
“Ah,” Younghoon drawled with a knowing sparkle in his eyes, “Jacob and JC!Yn, right? I don't know; I find it kind of amusing.”
Chanhee frowned. A furrow had formed between his brows. “If amusing means to the extent where I'd like to rip my hair out, that is. Did you know that Jacob sent me to go intervene when Jaehyun was talking to JC!Yn at the hot tub?”
“Wait, really?”
“Mhm.” Chanhee made a vague flourish with his wrist in the air. “And did you see how they were at the movie night on Saturday?”
Younghoon pressed his lips together. “I did see that. He kept looking over when Juyeon was braiding her hair,” he chuckled.
“I am at odds, Younghoon-ah!” Chanhee groaned into his palms. “I just need them to kiss already and get it over with.”
“So you wanna meddle?”
“I'm not saying we should meddle, but…” He drawled with cheeky, puckered lips and his palms open upward. His gaze went to you on his right side, and he knocked the back of his knuckles against your arm. “Oy, Yn-ah. What do you think?”
You hummed and drew your eyes up from your laptop screen, meeting Younghoon's gaze first. Glancing over to the friend who addressed you, you said, “What are we talking about?”
“Girl, you need to get off that grant app.”
“This grant app needs to get off me,” you shot back. “I need it to be perfect, Chanhee.”
“Nothing is perfect, Yn,” he told you. “You know what you should do? You should ask JC!Yn to look over it. That might ease your mind.”
“I'll think about it,” you said at last in order to appease him. The smart thing would've been to heed his advice and ask his friend to proofread it. Perhaps you would later this week.
“Good. Anyways, I was asking you what you thought about how to matchmake our two friends,” resumed Chanhee. He tucked his limbs inward as he spun around in his chair.
“You’re going to have to give me more context than that.” Besides that, were you really the best option to ask for advice? You weren't in a relationship, and now that you thought about it, neither were the two of them.
You saw Chanhee and Younghoon exchange glances and there seemed to be a silent conversation taking place between the two of them. At last, Younghoon gave his counterpart a flourishing gesture with his hand as if saying 'all yours.’ Chanhee cleared his throat. “So Younghoon's friend Kevin, who is Jacob's best friend, introduced JC!Yn to Jacob.”
“And we're pretty sure they like each other,” Younghoon added on. “There was this pool party a couple weekends ago, and they came to the party together. This past weekend, they looked pretty cozy at the movie night that Jacob and Kevin hosted at their apartment, too.”
You had only ever met JC!Yn once in passing, and it was because Chanhee forgot his calculator at the library right before an exam, and she had been the champion to deliver it to him in the examination hall lobby. She was a real one, that was for sure.
You pursed your lips and rested your chin on your fist. “Aren't all of you guys single?” Was what you led with.
Chanhee deadpanned. “That's not the point…”
“I do have to point that out though because you ask me like I would know what to do,” you laughed, vaguely gesturing back to yourself. “I'm just as single as the rest of you.”
The two boys’ eyes whipped back to one another for a millisecond, before looking away.
You nearly leapt to your feet, exclaiming, “I saw that! What was that?”
“Nothing,” they answered at once. They did realize it made them look all the more conspicuous, right?
“We just realized that not all of us are single,” Younghoon raced to smooth over his and Chanhee's fib. “My friend Sangyeon—”
Chanhee snorted, “Hyunjae told me he doesn't believe him.”
“And you believe Hyunjae?”
“Touché.”
You unconsciously began spinning your pencil around your fingers again. “Wait, so Sangyeon is cuffed?”
Younghoon turned to you to explain. Apparently, his original group of friends that didn't include Chanhee's extension, kept a running joke that Sangyeon was either making up his girlfriend or was keeping her stashed on a secret island in the Bahamas. None of them had seen any evidence that she truly existed, but Younghoon wasn't convinced that Sangyeon was the type of person to go through all of this strife just to prove a point.
After all of that, you were more confused than before. “But why wouldn't he just show you a picture of her and prove that he met this girl?”
“That's what I'm saying,” Chanhee interjected, flinging his arms up in the air. “It would be so easy to just silence us with a little picture!”
Younghoon, clearly amused by the discourse taking place, leaned back in his chair with a shrug. “Beats me. I personally think it's because she works for a secret government agency, which is why she can't exist online.”
Chanhee's expression flattened. “Uh-huh.”
“But Juyeon says that it's probably because if he only shows a picture, we might accuse him of Photoshop,” Younghoon continued. “Which, in retrospect, says a lot about his faith in us.”
You made a face, your eyebrows arching high. “Oh, for sure.”
Debating on conspiracy theories about mystery girlfriends made the last thirty minutes of yours and Chanhee's shift fly by fast. Suffice to say, you hadn’t worked on your application nearly as much as you wanted to, but you were entertained for thirty minutes, which was just as well. Didn’t doctors say that it was good to laugh at least three times a day…? Good thing you weren’t going into medicine.
The three of you started packing everything up at exactly nine-thirty. There was no reason to stay any longer when there was literally no one else here anyway.
As you shoved your laptop into your backpack, Younghoon knocked on the table in front of you. “Wanna grab dinner after this?”
You opened your mouth to reply when Chanhee beat you to it. He hadn’t seen Younghoon grab your attention, and didn’t know who he was addressing. “Oh, that’s nice of you to as—”
“I meant Yn.”
You closed your eyes and sank your teeth into your bottom lip to have some dignity left (read: not start wheezing). Chanhee’s eyes had gone wide, eyebrows rocketing back up to his hairline. He scoffed, “Wow.”
Younghoon grinned cheekily. “Sorry, Chanhee. We have a routine.”
With Chanhee now thoroughly offended, your little trio filed out of the tutoring center. You locked the doors up behind you once you flicked off all the lights in the room. The walk down in south campus was arguably nicer than north campus, even if you were a little biased because this was where you considered your “turf” to be. South campus was much better illuminated than north campus with pretty, little lamp posts and five different styles of architecture from building to building. You were sure it was an eyesore to any of the architecture majors here, but they were interesting to look at when you were suffering in the engineering library. (And at least they had windows.)
You took up the position in between Younghoon and Chanhee, the latter of whom seemed to let his pettiness about the rejected dinner date go.
“Guys,” Younghoon suddenly said. The corner of his lips were turned upward in a degree you could only define as mischievous. “What is the most terrifying word in physics?”
You scrunched your brows together. There was no way you should get this wrong, but then again, physics wasn't exactly a subject where anyone got everything right—
“Oops.”
You snorted, and beside you, Chanhee's lip wobbled as he desperately held in a reaction. You couldn't believe you didn't see this coming and tried to think about it logically.
Younghoon shoved his hands in his pockets and swiped his tongue over his lower lip through a smile. “Aw, come on! I cracked up when I heard that one in a TikTok for the first time.”
“I've just heard some of your better ones,” you confessed. “Chanhee, did I tell you that Younghoon used to wax poetic to study for calc?”
Chanhee's mouth curled up into an amused little smile. “You did! I think it's cute.”
“You know, I think it's cute, too.”
In the dim lighting from the nearby lamp posts, Younghoon's cheekbones flushed something rosy. “You flatter me.”
As the three of you climbed up the stairs that would bring you to main campus, Chanhee piped up, “What if we just slipped Jacob and JC!Yn notes from the other person?”
You shook your head. “Not this again.”
“I'm serious!” He said in earnest. “It would just be innocent, little pick-up lines or something. Nothing like a whole ass confession.”
“We're reading Much Ado About Nothing in my Shakespeare lecture right now,” said Younghoon, “and the cast does something similar to one of the couples they're trying to get together. Sounds kind of fun, to be honest.”
“Not you, too!”
Younghoon slung an arm around your shoulders and flourished his free arm out toward the heavens. There was a pleasant feeling attached to the weight of his arm around you. “C’mon, use that mastermind brain of yours and imagine! Jacob's would just say something like—I dunno—if I whispered in thine ear that thou hast a body of beauty, wouldst thou hold it against me?”
“Wow,” you marveled, ignoring the amount of fluttering happening in your stomach, “that was pretty good.”
He flashed you a boyish smile. “Thank you.”
“But you're not doing it.”
The boys on either side of you released twin groans of anguish into the night, as if their mother had just denied them access to their Xbox for the evening. You rolled your eyes lightly. “I feel like relationships are like spontaneous processes—they’ll get to the right configuration eventually, organically. In other words, we should leave them be and let them figure it out for themselves.” You walked in front and turned around to face them so you could pin them both down with a firm look.
Younghoon raised his arms up in playful surrender. “Promise we won't meddle.”
“I hate when you use entropy statistics against me.” Chanhee gave a reluctant nod, sighing once again, “But I agree. We won’t meddle.”
EPISODE EIGHT: DON'T ASK ME THE COLOR OF ANYTHING
IT was the Star Trek theme song that blasted you out of your study bubble. In retrospect, the theme song was quite a subdued piece compared to something like the Star Wars theme, but for some reason you thought it was a good idea to turn the volume all the way up for your ringer whenever you were home. (God forbid you accidentally left it on when you were in class…) From your desk, you scooted over to grab your phone from where it was on your bed. Younghoon's caller ID beamed its cute smile up at you—the picture you'd set was of him and his dog from home, Bori. You had yet to meet Bori, but when you asked him for a picture for his contact photo, he sent this one.
You accepted the call. “Hello?”
“I just realized I pressed Call instead of Facetime. Please accept the Facetime thingy.”
Why did he sound so cute? You lifted the phone away from your ear and saw the request on the screen. While pressing the green accept button, you said to him, “What if I said no?”
“Then it must be Opposite Day,” he sang from the other side of the screen, his face manifesting before you. He was holding his phone up above him so you could see he was lying down in bed, his dark hair strewn over the pillow beneath his head. His initial smile widened to reach his eyes when your side of the screen loaded and he could see you. “There she is.”
“Hi Hoon,” you greeted with a small chuckle. You looked around your cluttered workspace for a place to prop your phone up against.
“What're you up to?” He asked while he adjusted himself to sit up against his headboard.
“I—” you made a sound of accomplishment as your phone stayed upright in the space between your desk lamp and a pebble paperweight painted like a rocket that your little sister made you, “—am brushing up on fluid mechanics.”
“Aah… fluid mechanics.” You could hear the slight intonation in his words.
“Don't say the joke.”
“I wasn't gonna say the joke!” He giggled. When he calmed, he pressed his mouth in a smile and made his cheeks look as squishy as a loaf of bread. “Is this a bad time though?”
You shook your head, slipping your pencil behind your ear so you could lace your fingers beneath your chin. “No, it’s not a bad time. This isn’t super important; I just didn’t want old material to jumpscare me when I go into our quiz this week.”
Younghoon nodded in understanding. “I see, I see. That means it’s good that I interrupted your workaholic tendencies.”
You glanced away with your hand half covering your face, and it coaxed a laugh from him that seemed to warm the room. You sputtered, “In my defense—” you paused, your lips parted; it hit you then that you had no defense.
His eyes were the shapes of upturned crescent moons, like shallow bowls filled with mirth. “It’s cute when you try to deny it.”
“It’s not denial—I didn’t deny it,” you pointed out.
“Uh-huh,” he snorted, completely unconvinced, “whatever you say, Miss Mastermind. I should call you Miss Workaholic instead.”
“Aish,” you chided weakly. You glanced down at the old notes that were splayed out before you on your desk. All of the concepts were relatively familiar to you; it was just to refresh yourself. To be frank, though, it wasn’t like you’d spent all evening reviewing old material. Every thirty minutes or so, you could spend another half hour on your phone, getting lost in the entertainment there. You weren’t that much of a workaholic.
You realized that there had been a pregnant moment of silence just then, and when you looked back over at the phone screen, found him watching you with a certain look in his eyes that you couldn’t quite place. You cleared your throat, reaching up to tuck a stray lock of hair behind your ear and to take the pencil there down. “So, uhm, any reason in particular for calling?”
His eyelashes fluttered as he blinked, as if snapping out of a daze. “Hm? Oh, not really. I just wanted to see what you were up to.” He cocked his head to the side in thought. “Random question, but are you doing anything for Halloween?”
Ah, you nearly forgot that was coming up. With all of the chaos happening in your life at the moment, Halloween was the last thing on your mind.
“Not at the moment,” you told him. You mused, “I don’t think I’ve done anything proper for Halloween since I moved out of my childhood house.” Going Trick-or-Treating as an adolescent was definitely a core memory for you, and was still a prevalent tradition in your household because of the little ones, Sadie and Quincey. As you got older, however, you usually opted to stay at home and answer the door to hand out candy. You still dressed up for the fun of it, and decorating the house was always half the joy of the holiday. You always considered trying to build some kind of candy contraption or maybe setting up a haunted maze in the front lawn, but alas, maybe in the future. “What about you?”
“Well, there’s that party that Changmin and Chanhee are hosting at their place.”
That rang a bell. “Ohh, shit. I totally forgot about that.” Chanhee had mentioned something about that the other night at the tutoring center, but you didn’t make any promises about attending—he knew your crowd preferences, so he didn’t push it. You were sure his and his friend’s parties were a blast though.
Younghoon shifted his lounging position, so now he was laying on his stomach with his legs kicking up from behind him. “Would you wanna come with? I remember that you went to that party with Sakura in September, but I wasn’t sure if you were going to come to this one.”
You tapped the end of your pencil against the pages of your notebook. “I’m not really sure,” you confessed. “I think I originally didn’t plan on going.”
“Ah.”
Guilt swirled around in the pit of your stomach at the disappointment in his voice. “I’m sorry; I probably sound like such a party pooper.”
“No, don’t worry about it,” he rushed to assure you. “I get that it might not be something you’re into, and that’s completely fine, you know? I think it would be fun to go with you, but not if you wouldn’t have fun there.”
You inhaled deeply. “I mean… it’s not that I don’t think I would have fun once I—y’know, drank something—but yeah, I think a night of just horror movies or something will do me better.”
He nodded and carded a hand through his hair. “Of course; I understand. And your schedule’s been pretty packed lately, so it’ll be like a little break for you,” he offered.
“Yeah, thanks, Hoon.” You shot him a small smile. It was really cool that he was being so understanding, but you shouldn’t have anticipated anything less from Kim Younghoon. He’d always been this cool.
You learned to read the room, and the energy definitely was lower than before. “Do you know what you’re gonna go dressed as?” You asked in hopes of bringing that energy back up.
He perked up a bit at the question. “I—actually, I have no idea,” he chuckled. “I was thinking a vampire, but I feel like that should just be saved as my backup. That idea’s a little tired.”
Younghoon as a vampire—? Wake up, Yn. You laughed to yourself as a thought popped into your head. “It would be so funny if you showed up as Bill Nye the Science Guy.”
He snorted. “That's not a bad idea. I'm not a science guy, but I am an actor.”
“Hey, there you go,” you said. You pursed your lips. “Hm… I feel like your face is too pretty to fuck up—”
“Thanks?” He guffawed, hand propping his head up. “I'm scared to ask you what that even means.” You didn’t want to tell him exactly what you had in mind, but it seemed that he beat you to a punchline. “To be honest, I'd so let you fuck up my face.”
Your eyes widened. “What?”
“Hyunjae? Hyunjae, is that you?” Younghoon called out behind him toward his closed bedroom door. His ears were rosy as blood, and he was biting his lip through a grin. “I've gotta go, Yn-ie. Byeee!”
“Younghoon, hey! Don't hang—”
He hung up. You took a moment to collect yourself after what he said, as if you could even begin to unpack its meaning.
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You could hear the partygoers even from the relative serenity of the back corner of the convenience store. It was Halloween night, and when the sun sank down into the horizon to signal the coming of night, so too did it mark the beginning of the Hallow's Eve festivities.
You had just dropped Sakura off at one of her friends’ house for a party, and she would text you later when she was done. The plan tonight was originally to chill at home and watch scary movies, but you instead found yourself at your second home with your laptop playing The Nightmare Before Christmas. On your head sat a deep purple colored witch's hat on a headband, with glittery black tulle creating a skirt at its base. Even if you didn't dress up completely, you would still pop on a bit of holiday spirit.
With you was a 6-pack of Halloween themed mini cupcakes and a carton of strawberry milk. They would function as your popcorn for the movie and your candy for the night.
From beside you on the table, your phone buzzed. You could see the words diffuse rapidly onto your screen, your eyes snagging on the parts where your older sister was asking about Sakura coming to the wedding even though she was supposed to be in Japan. Your eyes widened as you scrambled to text back. Fuck, the wedding. You texted back a very fast, ‘uhm abt that.’
daphne: ykw don't tell me anything ignorance is bliss daphne: okay what i came here to do originally… daphne: *sent images* your phone: awwwh how cute!! wait wtf since when was quincey into power rangers 😭😭 daphne: dear god don't get me started
You laughed and sent her a final text back commenting about the pictures she sent of her, Sam, Sadie, and Quincey all dressed up to go Trick-or-Treating tonight. As usual, your family extended an invitation to you, but you declined for this year.
“Damn, I should've dressed up like the power rangers.”
You nearly jumped out of your skin at the sudden voice right by your ear, and you ripped your earbud out, whipping around to see who it was. There was Younghoon, laughing at your expense with a very amused smile flitting over his face from your reaction.
About five different emotions passed over you at once, preventing you from coming up with an adequate response to his sudden appearance. Your mouth, frankly, had gone dry. His hair was colored and highlighted with strands of platinum silver, artfully arranged around a pair of black sunglasses atop his head. He was clad in all black—the leather jacket seated on his shoulders embellished with white detailing, and his skin glimmering with silver chains. He had on a pair of motorcycle gloves that he was now shucking off, and you realized his lips were a shade darker than they usually were—wait… were they moving?
“—Yn. Yn-iee—”
You blinked long and hard. “Yeah. I'm here.”
The corner of his lips curled upward. “I just said I was sorry for sneaking up on you.”
“Oh.” Wait, he smelled so good right now… Not that he didn't smell good every other day, but…
“Oh,” he parroted with a cock of his eyebrow. “So, what do you think?” He asked the question you didn't even realize you would fear him to ask, and gestured down to the outfit. Younghoon sighed and it sounded half like a laugh. “I feel ridiculous actually. Hyunjae was like—you should do the biker thing with me. And I was like, what do you mean 'biker thing?’ Apparently this is the biker thing.”
You were slapping yourself across the face internally to say something. “You went from Prius driver to motorcycle rider.”
Younghoon nearly keeled over and had to turn to the side to laugh. “I still am a Prius driver,” he said sheepishly.
Your eyes flickered up and down his form again, unable to string together words once more. “Uhm, your hair is silver.”
“Excellent observation.” He reached over and poked the little witch hat on top of your head. “This is cute, by the way.”
“Thanks,” you said with a smile, reaching up to touch either side of the headband. “I'm just here waiting for Kkura.”
“Oh, are you guys watching something together?”
You shook your head and turned back to your computer screen to wake it up. “No, I volunteered to be her chauffeur tonight. She's at a party right now, but I figured since I had time to kill, I could chill here.”
“It feels like a crime for you to be here all alone,” he said with one of his hands braced against the back of your chair and the other on the table next to your laptop. He was leaning over you now to peer at your screen because the brightness of the store lights made it difficult to see from where he stood, but it made him all the more apparent to your senses.
Goddamn, he was everywhere. “Well, I should be asking you as to why you're here,” you said with a cough. “Don't you have a party to go to, Biker Boy?”
He chuckled at the nickname and stood back up. “I do, but Chanhee and Changmin forgot to get triple A batteries for their battery-operated creepy candy bowl,” he said. “But I'm glad I was sent out to run an errand now.”
You shifted your mouth to the side in a sorry attempt to hide your contentment with that answer. “I'm glad, too. You—the costume looks good, by the way.”
Younghoon sat down in his usual seat across from you. “Thank you,” he replied, pleased. “I almost went out as a loaf of bread. Did you know Party City has these bread loaf costumes that you can wear around your head?”
“I'm not surprised at all,” you said, shaking your head in amusement.
You found yourself unhappy with the idea of Younghoon leaving after this. Once your conversation was over, you would go back to your movie and he would go back to his party. Before, you didn't mind the idea of having an evening to yourself, but with him right here in front of you, it was difficult to go back.
Him being here with you felt right. You couldn't explain why you felt that way. He looked like he was about to say something, and you rushed to beat him to it. “Want a cupcake?” You blurted. Before you could go back on your words, you gently pried a miniature cupcake out from its containment and offered it to him.
Younghoon lit up, delicately transferring the treat to his own hands. “I wasn't going to ask, but don't mind if I do. Thanks, Yn.”
You hummed happily as he peeled off the cupcake wrapper and took a generous bite. He did a little happy dance in his seat, and you smiled half into your fist as you leaned part of your cheek onto it.
“That's actually so good,” he said with wide, confused eyes as he reached toward the furthest end of the table for a napkin in the aluminum canister. “Why haven't I tried those before? I think I'm gonna have to take some back.”
“I don't have them often, but they are quite the guilty pleasure,” you agreed. “I would totally sponsor a couple packs for you to take to the party.”
Younghoon made a nodding motion with his head as he dabbed the napkin over his lips. He pulled the napkin away to inspect it, frowning. “Shit, I need to reapply,” he murmured and fished around in his jacket pocket for a tube of the shade that he had wiped off his lips.
Some force from the universe compelled you to do something fucking stupid. “I can help.” No, you can't! Why would you say that, why would you say—
Surprise flickered across his face. “Oh? Sure, I'd appreciate it,” he said, and held the lip gloss out to you. It was a muted brown-ish pink color that would leave a stain of itself upon the wearer's lips, but also had an initial glossy appearance.
With no room for backpedaling, you stood up and took the lip product from him. You stood before him now, between his legs with his hands resting on his knees.
He peered up at you through his dark lashes, lips parted gently.
You wiped the excess product off the doe foot applicator against the rim of the packaging, and then smeared the product over his bottom lip. You took your finger to smudge the color around, making quick work with a second layer for shine. When you were done, you hadn't even realized you'd been holding your breath the whole time. You passed the lip product back to him quietly. “All done,” you whispered.
He didn't even look at your handiwork—he didn't need to. He smiled; you thought you saw him steal a glance at some place other than your eyes. “Thanks, love.”
You were right before when you thought you would dread him leaving. He did go, at some point, after retrieving what he had come here for along with at least three half-dozen containers of cupcakes. He sent you a wave from the door, and then he was gone into the night.
You sat there without doing much or thinking anything for a moment or two, your fingertips stained with the color of his lips.
Regret wormed a hole through your stomach, and it felt like it was gaping wide open. Maybe you should've gone to the party, or maybe you should have asked him to stay. Maybe you should have said something different, and maybe… maybe you should have…
Kissed him?
Your eyes stared unblinkingly at the seat across the table from you, and you arrived at a truth you could no longer ignore.
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your phone: how do u know u like a guy
kkuramon &lt;3 : IM LEAVING THIS PARTY RIGHT NOW.
EPISODE NINE: ARE YOU A CHICKEN, YN? I DIDN'T THINK SO!
“I'M not going to tell him.”
“Yn,” Sakura said gravely with a deep inhale, “for the last time, are you a chicken?”
You blinked. “I'm sorry, wha—”
“Bawk bawk. Are you a chicken?”
You narrowed your eyes slightly at her. It was a crazy image, this view of your best friend, as she stood in front of you with her futuristic spacecore outfit from the Halloween party she left early, squawking like a chicken. “I think you are drunk.”
Sakura deadpanned. “I'm not drunk.”
“And I'm in denial.”
“Oh, good. So you admit it.”
After rapid discourse in your texts, you went to pick Sakura up from her party, then brought her straight home so you could both deconstruct what exactly you concluded while at the convenience store. You recalled everything that happened while Younghoon was there with you, reliving that exact moment it hit you square in the face like an oncoming train.
And now you were here, being asked if you were a chicken and being accused of denial.
You huffed. “I can't just tell him that I like him! It's not—it’s not that big of a deal. It's not like I'm in love with him or anything!” You… you weren't in love, were you…?
Sakura braced both hands on her hips. “You say it's not a big deal, but here we are,” she said with a vague gesture to your bedroom. “Honey,” she continued, but softer, “whether you're in love with him or you just like him more than a friend, it's something. It's different. Are you sure you never felt anything for him before? Not even unconsciously?”
“I mean—” you started, “—I might have. I probably have,” you corrected, cradling your chin in your palm. “I thought he was really cool when I met him last year, but I think that was just one of those silly crushes, y'know? Like the ones you get on people you pass by and know you probably won't meet again?”
She hummed and lowered herself onto the edge of your bed. “Yeah, I get that.”
You scooted your desk chair over to where she was and flopped face first over your bed with a groan. You felt her hand gently smooth down the back of your head. “I dunno, Kkura. Maybe I've always felt something different about him.”
“That could be it,” she said. “And you just didn't realize until it was in your face. Sometimes it sneaks up on you.”
If that wasn't the understatement of the century.
“Why are you so scared of telling him, Yn-ie? From everything I've seen and heard from you, it feels like he probably feels the same way.”
“I'm biased.”
Sakura exhaled. “Logic your way out of this one.”
“Okay, if I logic my way out of this one, I could still get rejected.”
You could feel her eyes roll, even with your face smooshed into the sheets. “I know the prospect of all this is scary, but it's meant to be. That means you care, Yn. That means you care about your friendship with Younghoon, and that's inherently a good thing.”
When you didn't say anything else in response, she added, “You know your feelings will intensify if you leave them unaddressed. Murphy's Law.”
You hated when she was right.
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You didn't see Younghoon for at least another week. Once Halloween had gone and passed, November hit everyone in one big fell swoop. Midterms the Sequel was abound, and it did not choose mercy. But amongst the abundance of fires cropping up, you managed to spray some water on a couple to keep the flames tame. (Do not do this to real fires; it won't help.)
It was the middle of the week when you and Younghoon agreed to meet back at the convenience store to hang out. Over the past few days, you kept your interactions with him over text and call as normal as possible, even though you felt like your newly realized feelings were glaringly obvious. If Younghoon thought you were being awkward though, he didn't say.
You and Sakura were in the kitchen right before you were about to take off to head to the convenience store. She was busy making a late lunch (read: dinner); you were busy worrying about everything.
“I've got an idea,” she said, raising the spatula in her hand into the air. “You should bring Younghoon to the wedding.”
You nearly choked on air. “I'm sorry? Say that again.”
With her back turned to you, she gave an emphasized shrug. “If you insist. I was suggesting that you bring Younghoon to the wedding instead of me. It would be killing two birds with one stone.”
“How in the world is that killing two birds with one stone?”
“Well, when you inevitably confess your feelings to him, and he confesses that he reciprocates, you will then have a date for the wedding.” She turned the stove off before twirling around on her slippered-heel, a proud smile on her face. “Ta-da!”
“I just think that if—and big emphasis on if—we do end up together, a wedding would be a lot as an outing.” You imagined how horrific and intimidating that would be, meeting your entire family and extended family after only just deciding to try out dating someone. Even thinking about it sounded overwhelming beyond means, and you couldn't do that to Younghoon.
She angled her head to the side. “But this is Younghoon we're talking about. He literally went to the Space Gala with you on short notice and made you feel safe and comfortable the whole time.”
You sent her a pointed look. “That's not the same thing and you know it.”
She sighed. “Alright. Then what about driving over to meet you at the convenience store at midnight when he had an early rehearsal the next day? He calls you and texts you day and night; he drops by the tutoring center on your shifts to keep you company… I don't know what else you need to convince you.”
You didn't like the spark of hope she was lighting up in your chest. You didn't want to lose a good friend if you were reading him wrong. Was he not charismatic to everyone he met though?
At some point, you got your ass up and down the street. There was a soft tune playing in the background as you wandered through the aisles in search of something to distract you from the anxious racing of your heartbeat. Younghoon had sent you a heads up about an hour ago that he was going to be late because he was coming from an outing, so you had a little more time to mentally prepare. Maybe you would chalk up the courage to tell him. Maybe you really could do it. If you just ripped off the bandaid, whether it be for better or for worse, you could at least say you tried.
You made up your mind then, somewhere in the bread aisle between the wheat and rye.
By the time Younghoon arrived, out of breath and grinning from ear to ear, you managed to hype yourself up to tell him.
“Sorry I'm late,” he said between breaths as he claimed the seat across from you. He paused, sniffing, then grimacing. “And also for the fact that I reek of barbeque.”
“Don't worry about it,” you assured him, teasingly, “the only thing you should be sorry about is not inviting me.”
Younghoon laughed. “You're very right, as always. My friends and I were having an emergency meeting about Jacob and JC!Yn.”
Your eyes widened. “Oh? Any updates?”
He groaned then, burying his face into the palms of his hands. Uh oh. “They almost kissed until Eric interrupted them.”
“No,” you gasped.
“Yes!” He wailed in agony, eyes screwed closed with imaginary tears running down his cheeks. “It was painful to hear but it was also painful watching those two idiots interact at the table. My friends and I, minus JC!Yn and Jacob—we met a little beforehand to talk about what went down when Eric interrupted, and the lovebirds just came in later.” Younghoon huffed a rough sigh from his lips, partnered with a shake of his head. Then he broke into a smile, the corners of the expression soft, as he looked at you from across the table. He rested his cheek against his hand, chin inclining toward you, “So what's going on with you, hm? I feel like we haven't seen each other in ages.”
“We did call on Tuesday,” you pointed out.
He wrinkled his nose with a frown and shrugged. “It's not the same. I missed you.”
Your heart was beating so loud that you could count them out—thump, thump, thump— “I—missed you, too,” you said in earnest. Tell him, Yn. Tell him.
“You know, I think it's funny how we lost touch for so long, but we eventually came back together,” he murmured as he absentmindedly traced out shapes along the table top. “I guess if it's meant to be, then it'll be.”
The way he worded it… you were spinning yourselves in circles in your head trying to define it, to crack it open and solve it like you could a word problem. If the rotator wheel spins at a velocity of—but at this point, you were certain that you could figure out one of those much faster than this. “Yeah,” you agreed quietly.
“Something on your mind, Yn?” He asked you then. His eyes returned to you and you were suddenly stuck. The earth stopped spinning for this single moment in time, all because of the way this man looked at you.
You swallowed. “I…” The words dissipated in your throat. You couldn't do it.
Younghoon waited patiently, though. He considered you and your wide eyes filled with something he didn't know how to label, and maybe a dash of another thing he hoped to find. “Why don't we take a walk?”
With no reason to refuse, you stood up from your seat with him. He smiled at you as he brushed his hand over your back to guide you to the door, then retracted it to tuck his hand into his pocket.
November had so far shown the city a brisk, deep autumn. The trees were already close to completely shedding their leaves for the oncoming winter, and they were often swept away by a cool draft. You zipped up your jacket as the two of you began walking in the direction opposite to your apartment. Whichever way the wind took you both, you supposed.
For the first time in a long time, you and Younghoon were quiet. You were trapped in your own head with the courage you had earlier having mysteriously disappeared. He seemed content enough to let you ponder on it and to speak whenever you were ready.
“My cousin is getting married,” you found yourself saying.
That didn't seem to be the thing he expected to come from your mouth. Surprise flashed across his features and he clambered for a response. “Oh, well, congratulations. When's the wedding?”
“Thanks.” You said, “It’s in December. I… you know I have a big family.”
“Right.” His gaze softened considerably. “I imagine it must be a lot for you then—a family event of that size.”
You realized that you didn't convey exactly what you wanted to get across, and yet, you were reminded again how much he cared. “Yeah,” you murmured. “My brother Justin isn't gonna be able to make it after we already RSVP'd under my immediate family of seven people, and so my mom and I are trying to find someone to fill that space. She wanted to invite this one guy—he was my next-door neighbor for some time. Not my favorite person in the world because he's kind of got it out for me,” you said next.
You were rounding the corner again to loop back down the street toward your apartment. The organ in your chest was flying against your ribcage now; there wasn't much time left to tell him. You could see the metaphorical sand in the glass draining.
“So you're not going to invite this guy then, right?”
You nodded. “And I offered up Sakura just to appease her for the time being, but Sakura's gonna be in Japan in December.”
Younghoon trapped his bottom lip between his teeth. “I see.”
“That's my… that's my dilemma.” No, that isn't your only dilemma, Yn! Tell him! But the apartment was coming up in view, and you would be at the entrance in just a few more minutes.
You and Younghoon slowed your pace as you rounded the block again to cross the street. When you glanced over at him, you swore you could see the conflict warring across his face. If he saw gears turn in your head, you could see a battle scene in his eyes.
“Is this all that's been bothering you?” He asked at last, and you didn't know what to do about the slight intonation in his voice, like he was hoping for something. “I'm not invalidating your stress or anything, I was just—you know, if you had anything else you needed to get off your chest—”
“No, it's just that.” You could practically hear Sakura clucking like a chicken from wherever she was. You quickly added as the apartment door came into view, “It's—it’s not a big deal—finding a plus one, I mean. I'll figure it out.”
Plus one. He'd been your plus one to the Space Gala, but this was different. This was so much more different than that.
But maybe your words sounded like a dismissal or he was thrown off today. He cupped the back of his neck with a small nod. “Okay. If you need anything, let me know.”
“Thanks, Hoon.”
He smiled then, the same soft-cornered one that reached his eyes, and that you'd come to be familiar with. You couldn't imagine seeing that face reject your feelings even if you knew he would probably let you down easily.
EPISODE TEN: YOU SPELL PARALLELISM WITH THREE L'S BECAUSE THERE ARE THREE LOSERS
THE engineering library at nine o'clock at night was a familiar environment for you, Chanhee, and Jungwoo. Dead week—the week before finals—meant that it saw the three of you twice as much, even on the weekend before Dead week began. It didn't mean you got studying done though. Sometimes you were just there.
“You guys are so fake! How could I not be updated on every single microevent in your lives?” Jungwoo cried, gesticulating his hands around far too fast for your brain to comprehend. He was about three shots of espresso and five hours in, if that explained things. You were all aware that your habits were not healthy, but no college kid was. “And you call me your friend?”
The thing that had triggered this reaction from Jungwoo had been Chanhee's fault. Or maybe that was your fault. Either way, the topic somehow had gone from calculating your respective grades with probable curves (calculating failure, at this rate) to you and Younghoon.
You liked to argue there was no you and Younghoon—it was just you-comma-Younghoon. Chanhee had sassed back at you with a swift, “Oh, so she's an English major now?” As if English majors were the only ones who could understand grammar and punctuation.
Jungwoo, having had no context given whatsoever, realized quickly that he was out of the loop. Now, you were here.
“I demand the tea!” He screeched, hitting the palm of his hand against the table. Thank god there was no one else here to listen in or shush you and your friends. If there was one thing about the engineering library, it was how out of the way it was from the main campus.
“I really don't think you should have anything else caffeinated—”
Jungwoo's head whipped toward you and his nostrils were flared. “You must think you're so funny,” he said with narrowed eyes and a saccharine smile. You would have been scared had you not seen this man once blow a massive snot bubble all over his differential calculus homework. (If anyone found out about that, it most definitely didn’t come from your lips…)
Your eyes shuddered, an innocent smile coming to your lips. “I was just saying.”
“Shuuush!” He stopped, thought about it, then retracted. “Actually, don't shush. Tell me what you and Chanhee know, but I don't.”
Chanhee snorted from his side of the table. “That's a long list.”
Jungwoo cut a glare toward Chanhee. “I despise you both,” he grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest.
“Okay, but all jokes aside,” Chanhee said as he tucked his tablet stylus behind his ear. He cocked a high-arched brow your way. “What is going on, Yn? Do update us. Or for Jungwoo’s sake, start from the beginning.”
Your eyes widened like a deer in headlights. You hadn’t expected Chanhee to turn on you, too, but perhaps you should have seen this coming. A generous amount of time had passed since you last failed to confess your feelings to one Kim Younghoon. Between that day and today, you had managed to finally submit your space grant application and passed your second round of midterms by the seat of your pants (hip, hip, hooray). Since that day, you and Younghoon would continue to interact as normal, except for the fact that you were practically walking on eggshells around him.
Just the other day, you both fell asleep while on-call with each other. When you’d woken up the morning afterward, you discovered that, one, it was a good thing you plugged your phone into its charging cord; and two, that Younghoon was just as pretty asleep as he was awake.
To this news, Chanhee merely fluttered his lengthy lashes, unimpressed. “And you’re telling me you don’t think he feels the same way?” He asked.
At some point, Jungwoo had broken out a half-eaten granola bar from his bag to munch on as a replacement for popcorn. “I can’t believe I’ve missed so much,” he said, shoving the bite into his cheek so he could speak. “And Kim Younghoon, Yn? Wooooow, I see you girl. That guy was insane as Charles Bingley in freshman year.”
“You’re so right,” Chanhee chimed in with an indulgent nod, pointing his stylus at Jungwoo. “I don’t know if insane was the right word, but he encapsulated the Bingley gent essence quite nicely.”
“I never saw that one,” you confessed.
Jungwoo’s face scrunched up on one side. “Clearly. At least he knows that you’re not just in it for his celebrity status.”
You leaned back in your chair and dragged your hands down the length of your face with an embarrassed groan. Only your guy friends; Chanhee and Jungwoo, as expected, gave a light laugh at your expense. “I don't like you guys.”
“C’mon Yn-ie,” Chanhee teased and reached over to poke your arm with the butt of his stylus pen. When you peeked one eye out between your fingers, he puckered his lips at you like a penguin. “Love you.”
You reluctantly slid your hands down. “If I'm gonna be clowned for my feelings, I'd rather be in bed!” You declared, taking your phone from the pile at the center of the table to check the time. It was nearly ten o'clock at this rate. Ah, and had anything productive been done? Absolutely none. Perfectly on track for the three of you.
“Nooo, don't go, Yn! You're too sexy,” Jungwoo whined.
“I think you should tell Younghoon your feelings,” said Chanhee. He hiked his feet onto the chair, hugging his knees to his chest. “You need to razz him up.”
You frowned. “I thought it was ‘rizz.’”
“You don't have rizz, though, so I thought razz would be the next best thing,” he said flippantly.
“Burn!” Jungwoo exclaimed with his hand cupped around his mouth, and you were suddenly reminded that he was in a frat.
You leaned your cheek against the palm of your hand with a dramatic sigh. “You're right; I do not have rizz.”
Chanhee's brows scrunched together in concern. “Oh my god, I thought you would fight back—of course, you have rizz, Yn! You snagged Kim Younghoon!”
Before you could tell him you’d given up on fighting back or before Jungwoo could give up on his sanity, Chanhee's phone buzzed from where it was sitting at the center of the table. You expected it to be Chanhee's friend, CH!Yn, since she was the most probable person texting at this hour; instead, Chanhee let out a delighted gasp, slapping his hand to his mouth at whatever notification he found waiting for him.
Both you and Jungwoo leapt to your feet and scrambled to peer over his shoulders. “What? Who is it?”
“It's JC!Yn,” he shrieked. “She's asking about flower shops.”
You and Jungwoo stayed perched over either of Chanhee's shoulders to see what would transpire. It was a brief exchange within the group chat of three people that included JC!Yn, Changmin, and Chanhee. Chanhee somehow knew about a flower shop in the university district that was open until eleven o'clock. After all your years of attending this school, you had no idea it even existed.
But once JC!Yn was off on her way, Chanhee turned his phone off with a prediction that he would not be hearing from her until at least tomorrow morning. “Looks like someone's getting confessed to tonight,” he snickered to himself.
Jungwoo was back in his original seat—a generous wording, since he leaned a good eighty percent of his body over the table with his knees braced on the chair, legs kicking up behind him. “You know what you should do, Yn? You should sweep Younghoon off his feet just like that. I'm sure he adores receiving flowers.”
“Would it not be as special though if he gets flowers after every show?” You asked genuinely, pressing the butt of your pen between your lips. “I'm not against getting him flowers.” Flowers would be a good idea… you'd seen plenty of movies that had romanticized the idea of giving and receiving flowers in your mind, and it would be an obvious gesture. At the very least, you could pull a Younghoon and tell him the flowers reminded you of him because they were gorgeous—or something to that effect. Maybe you really didn't have rizz…
Jungwoo shrugged with one of his shoulders. “I'm sure it would be special coming from you. I dunno. It's just something to think about.”
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“So,” Juyeon drawled with his head lolling over the back of the couch to look over at Younghoon, “now that Jacob's situation is solved, what about you?”
Younghoon glanced up from his phone. “What about me?”
There were five of them holed up in Sangyeon's apartment presently, and four of them had invaded the eldest friend's abode to hoard his TV and play Super Smash Brothers. He was the only one with a working TV and decent WiFi to game on that wasn't Jacob and Kevin's apartment. Only, a couple hours in, Juyeon received a text message from Eric with a live update that JC!Yn was going to confess to Jacob.
Eric had ended his update with an ominous: Tell Kevin hyung he shouldn't go home tonight 🤣. That definitely livened up the place.
Kevin sat up from where he had been lying on the floor. “Oh, yo, you're so right. What's going on with you and Yn?”
Younghoon's eyes widened. “Nothing.”
“Don't give us that bullshit,” Hyunjae clicked his tongue in disapproval. “Didn't you say that you liked her?” He teased with a glint in his eyes as he wiggled his fingers Younghoon's way.
The man at the heart of the interrogation rolled his eyes and smacked Hyunjae's hand away. “I will not object to having said that I liked her, if that's what you're getting at.” Frankly, he would own up to having admitted that was how he felt about you. So what, he liked you? He wasn't embarrassed by it. The only problem was living with this knowledge and not telling you.
Sangyeon came over from the kitchen to lean against the back of the couch. He had a drink in hand, tongue poking the inside of his cheek. “Do you have a plan or are you gonna pull a Jacob and be a chicken?”
Kevin arched a high brow. “Only I can call Cobie a chicken, thank you very much.” He turned on Younghoon next with an accusing finger. “And you—I can't even go home right now, so let's get down to business.”
Younghoon blinked. “What business—”
“Order in the court!” Juyeon interjected. He grinned like a bunny. “Sorry, I know I have to wait until I'm a lawyer first, but it's just so fun to say.”
Sangyeon sputtered a laugh against the rim of his drink, blindly patting Juyeon on the head. “It's cool, man. Very appropriate timing.”
“We should play Marvin Gaye,” said Hyunjae. “It'll get us in the mood to tell Younghoon how to properly woo somebody.”
Younghoon swore his face was probably the shade of a ripe tomato. This was in no way how he thought his evening would go. And to be honest, he never ever expected having this conversation with his friends, ever. The last thing he wanted to do was to make his feelings all the more forward in his mind, and he was already having trouble whenever he was around you, and all you did was remind him of all the reasons why he wanted to be with you.
The thing was that he couldn't tell if you reciprocated his feelings. Sure, he could flirt and insert himself into your life all he wanted. But you could just be playing nice!
…actually, you probably were just playing nice. Dear god, he was back at square one.
He simply didn't want to lose your friendship, at the very least. Even if you didn't want to be with him in that way, he would pull up his big boy pants and be a friend to you instead. Then he wouldn't have to live without seeing you smile or listening to you work out problems aloud while he did mundane things in the background—
“And we lost him.”
Younghoon cleared his throat, raising a hand up to scratch his jawline. “You did not lose me,” he protested. The amount of attention on him right now was uncanny. Of course, he could go up onstage and be a character—but reality was different. He couldn't put on a mask or another personality; these people knew him… wasn't that scary? And yet, somehow freeing, at the same time.
Kevin inclined his chin to him with a little smirk. “You did have hearts in your eyes, my dude.”
“Aww, he's in love,” Sangyeon gushed while standing up to go refill his drink.
“I'm not in love!” He said with his index finger pointed at the sky. (He was in love. Of course, he knew he was in love. Because when all he did for the past three months of his life besides school was be around you and think about you and you you you… how could he not? Younghoon could fake any emotion in the world in front of an audience of people, but your eyes alone would devastate him.)
The entire apartment, sans Younghoon, chorused altogether now, “Yes, you are.”
Younghoon balked, rocketing upright. “There is no way all of you agreed on something for the first time and it was this.”
Hyunjae patted his friend's thigh from his position on the floor. “Believe it, Lover Boy. So what're you gonna do about it?”
“I wouldn't even know how to tell her,” Younghoon huffed, leaning back against the couch cushion with his arms crossed over his chest in thought.
That day when you'd told him about the wedding, he had been so hopeful that you were going to say something about feelings. He was so certain that he read you right, but you said nothing else afterward. He would totally go to that wedding with you, though; he just figured you might not want him to go, considering you'd dismissed it so quickly afterward.
Sangyeon came back to the couch and perched himself onto the arm of the sectional next to Juyeon. “It doesn't have to be fancy—you just need to be clear and straightforward.”
“Flowers could soften the blow,” suggested Juyeon.
Kevin chuckled. “For him or for Yn?”
Younghoon clicked his tongue at him with a playful scowl. “Quiet, you. But thanks, guys. I guess I just want to do this right. I don't wanna ruin what we already have.”
Juyeon pursed his lips and reached over to clasp his hand on his friend's shoulder. “You won't, man. I guarantee you that.”
“So if I get my heart broken, I can sue you for false advertisement?” Younghoon asked with his lips stretched in a grin, eyelashes fluttering innocently.
“Pssh,” Juyeon laughed, “try me.”
EPISODE ELEVEN: THE USUAL TIME & PLACE
IT was a frightening sequence of events when you texted Younghoon and he texted you at the same time. The Monday after Chanhee and Jungwoo had hyped you up to confess, you went around different items of furniture in your apartment with your phone in hand, pencil behind your ear, trying to work up the courage again to send the text.
And you did… eventually.
The usual time and place was decided upon, and it had snuck up on you as the day went on. You tied your shoes on and slipped out the door, making sure to pat your pocket down for where you had tucked your secret weapon for the night. As soon as you and Younghoon had confirmed a meeting for today, you ran to your (favorite) grad student, Seulgi, and asked very nicely for her set of keys into the planetarium, promising to treat her to brunch if she did.
The walk over to the convenience store was a jitter-filled one. Your stomach was doing cartwheels alongside the flips your heart performed in your chest. There was still activity on the streets, even at nine o’clock on a Dead week evening. You jumbled through the routine you had in mind over and over, a broken record of hopes and wants. The plan was to take a walk to the planetarium and use said walk to work up the courage to tell him. If anything went wrong, then you could cover it up with a cool presentation of stars overhead.
This isn’t lame, is it? You thought to yourself as you let yourself into the store. You were so in your head, you nearly didn’t notice that Younghoon was standing right in front of you, having just walked out of one of the aisles. You startled, breath hitching in your throat.
He smiled, the expression soft. “Hey,” he said to you and had to clear his throat, a hand brushing through his hair. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”
“All good; guess my head was just somewhere else,” you laughed nervously. You gripped the key in your pocket until you were sure your skin would smell like metal by the time you got to the planetarium. The two of you had met and hung out here a bundle of times before this, but this time in particular was different. The energy shifted in a way you couldn’t foretell if it was good or bad. For your sake, you hoped it was the former.
“Wanna talk about it?” He asked and took a step toward you.
You inhaled, nodding. “I do,” you said. “I—actually, uhm, do you want to go to the planetarium with me?” From your pocket, you withdrew the keys Seulgi gave you and wiggled them around by the keyring. “I bribed one of my seniors for the keys.”
Younghoon brightened, a laugh falling out of his mouth, and now he was standing right next to you. “Oh my god, you evil genius… my beloved mastermind, are we about to break some rules?” He teasingly bumped your arm with his, his eyebrows wagging up and down.
“Only if you’ll break them with me,” you beamed and reached for the door to the front door.
“But of course,” he played along with a giddiness shining through his expression. “Anything with you. Though, I’d like to stop somewhere on the way first.”
Without even visiting your table in the back of the shop, you and Younghoon took off into the night together. You couldn’t imagine where Younghoon wanted to stop by on the way, but you thought it was probably to run an errand of sorts. But for the moment, it was at the back of your mind as you tried to keep this as normal as possible. “Different” was so intimidating—you wanted to sink into the comfort that was whatever you and Younghoon had.
It wasn’t difficult to slip into that normalcy, though. He always made it so easy.
“—and they did so well, Yn-ah. You need to come back and see them in person; they’re always asking me where you are,” he told you with an invigorated passion. He gave a feigned sniffle. “Pretty sure they like you more than me.”
You shook your head, laughing, “You’re so dramatic. They love you, Hoon. I mean, I can’t even believe that they would remember me after having met them only once!”
“Well,” he drawled, glancing away for a spell, “that might be my doing.” He confessed sheepishly, “I do talk about you a lot—but hey! You can’t blame me! I like talking about subjects that mean a lot to me.”
Your heart made a full stop in your chest, and you nearly physically halted in the middle of the walkway. The gears in your head could barely process what he had just said without going into a spiral. It was a reminder of what this night was originally about. You sputtered out a reply, “You’re too sweet, you know that?”
“I try,” he jested.
“I do finish all my finals next week by Tuesday,” you told him. “I can totally come by that Wednesday and Friday for a little wing fitting. When’d you say the show was?”
He squinted one of his eyes in thought. “Err… it should be the Friday night after next, but if you do come through with those props, that should still give them enough time to get used to them before the performance.”
You nodded, mentally mapping out your schedule. Once your finals were through, you would have plenty of time to tinker with the props and have some proper fun after such a long quarter. “Sounds like a plan.”
“I appreciate it a lot, Yn,” he said, ducking his head as he nudged you with his elbow, “thank you in advance. I call you a workaholic, but here I am encouraging it.”
You chuckled. “It’s no trouble, Younghoon. Seriously. I like doing crafty things, and it’ll be a nice project. I promise.” To the end of that, you stressed further, “And if you think about it like you’re encouraging my hobbies and passions, then it feels a lot less like work.”
He hummed thoughtfully. “I suppose you’re right.” His head perked up when his eyes caught onto something in the near distance. His fingers unconsciously caught onto your wrist. “Here it is.”
Wherever you expected to find yourself, it was not a flower shop. There was no shop name or title anywhere that you could see, just the sketched posters and advertisements in the windows of chrysanthemums and hydrangeas. Troughs of vivid blooms lined the front windows like testaments to the plants one might expect to find within. Hanging planters dangled from the overhang, vines and foliage spilling over in an elegant mess.
There was one other sign posted in the window of the door that read its opening hours from 8am to 11pm.
Younghoon's cheekbones seemed to flush in the light streaming out from the inside of the shop. “Shall we?” He asked shyly and grabbed the door handle to open it for you.
You stepped inside before him with the door closing behind the two of you softly. You weren't sure where to go first—the room was constructed with two long tables in the center to hold smaller planters, then the perimeter was covered nearly from floor to ceiling with the larger plants, as well as the hanging garden pots like the ones outside hung from the ceilings by the lights.
There was someone to the right side of the room with a large, green watering can in hand. She glanced up when she heard the two of you come in. “Hi! How can I help you two?” She asked, reaching up to take out one of the earbuds she had in.
Younghoon placed one of his hands on your shoulder. “Would you mind if we took a look around?”
“No, not at all. Help yourselves; if you need anything, don't hesitate to holler.”
He smiled, “Sounds good, thank you!”
Did he know what he was here for? You followed him toward the leftmost table, unsure of where to wander yourself since there was so much stimuli. He stopped at one of the pots and you stood beside him. Leaning closer, you whispered, “I don't really know what we're looking at.”
“Me neither,” he admitted with an embarrassed grin, but then he pulled out a planter tag at the front of the pot he was examining. “But these might help.”
“You're probably right,” you mused, patting him on the arm.
“Look, these are carnations.” He scooted over to the next one over. There were an array of different colors of them, ranging from white to the deepest red. He placed a finger against his lips, then pointed at the white ones. “Those mean innocence, and those—” these were directed toward the blush pink ones, “—something along the lines of 'I'll never forget you.’”
You still stood close to him, and you reached over to gently warm the velvety petals between your fingertips. “I hope it's okay to touch them,” you suddenly said, swiftly retracing your fingers and peering over your shoulder at the worker.
“I'm sure it's okay,” he chuckled. He pointed out a buttery yellow set of petals a few pots down. “Aren't these gorgeous?” He breathed in awe.
When you arrived at the petal of choice, you raised the tag to see its name—daffodils. They were beautiful indeed, with pristine petals and tall stems, the color of them a rich yellow as if it had been painted rather than grown.
“What do these mean?” You asked.
“Unrivaled love? I think,” he answered with a slight tilt of his head.
You considered him for a moment with lips parted. “You're incredible, you know that? How do you know all this?”
His smile sweetened into something that made your chest feel warm. “You say that as if you're not the incredible one. But, Google. Don't look at my search history,” he muttered sheepishly.
It made you smile anyway.
You turned your head to scan the rows upon rows of diversity in one room. You were never quite the foliage fiend, but you could appreciate nature's beauty as much as nature's laws. Even if you might never be able to grow flowers of your own (because trust that you'd tried), as long as these places still existed, you could still admire and appreciate them.
Your eyes snagged onto a bundle of tulips at the front of the shop and you wandered over to take a look. Younghoon trailed after you to see what you wanted to look at, and stopped with you to admire the tulips. Their buds were near perfect, and they varied in so many colors—all soft purples, reds, yellows, pinks.
“Wow,” you said.
“Wow,” he agreed. He caressed the outside petals of one of the bulbs, then took the individual flower by the stem. He took yet another in his opposite hand and faced you. “What did the tulip say to the other tulip?”
You blinked. “Do indulge me.”
“We should put our tulips together and kiss,” he answered, and he pressed his own lips together in a barely contained smile.
You covered your mouth with one hand, a smile of your own blossoming under your palm. “I don't know about that one…”
“I don't be-leaf you when you say you're not a fan of that one.”
At this point, you could feel your face heat up and you could no longer hide your smile. “You're incorrigible.”
“It made you smile,” he quipped back with a smirk. He placed the tulips in his hands gently back into their pot, then swiveled on the balls of his feet. “They’re beautiful.”
“They are,” you agreed.
“Like you.”
Your eyes snapped up to his, but he already had his back turned to you as he surveyed the shop for the person who was on shift. Yet, you still spied the bit of red creeping up the back of his neck, and found yourself content.
“Hi, excuse me!” He caught the worker's attention. “Could we get just a little bundle of these tulips, please? Thank you so much.”
Your eyes widened and you tugged on the sleeve of his jacket. “Younghoon, what're you—”
He had a satisfied smile on his face. “Getting you flowers.”
“You don't need to get me flowers.”
“I’d like to,” he said simply, and that was the end of the conversation.
Less than ten minutes later, you and Younghoon were back out on the sidewalk with a new addition to the group. You cradled a small bouquet of tulips in the crook of your arm. The girl working there tonight had told you that being open so late caught a lot of last minute gift-givers as she wrapped your flowers in a tan colored butcher paper. She seemed to be an expert at tying ribbon bows that were just as beautiful as the flowers she tended, too.
You were already spinning far from your original intentions. You hadn't accounted for Younghoon making this gesture, and you wondered if he planned something for tonight.
Your counterpart suddenly cleared his throat while the two of you resumed your journey to the planetarium. You were only a few minutes away from the planetarium now. “I know I asked earlier if there was something you wanted to talk about,” he said, “but there is something I wanted to also talk about.”
Your heart fumbled over itself. “Uhm, yeah—yes, what's on your mind?”
From where you were on the street, you could see the broad dome of your target building just across the street. There was a rapid leap in your heart rate as he faced you beneath the street light shining over your heads like some kind of strangely timed, solo spotlight. The crosswalk turned green, but you stayed rooted to your place.
“I've been trying to figure out how to tell you this,” he began. He sucked in a deep breath and swallowed. You could only imagine how long he spent training himself to hold a poker face, but it was the liminal spaces where you could see right through him. “I like you a lot, Yn. It's—it’s an overwhelming amount, what I feel about you.”
You peered over at him wordlessly and hung onto every syllable coming from his mouth.
He wrung his hands out; this perhaps wasn't a script he was prepared for. But who ever came prepared for something like this? “And I think it's pretty obvious what I was hoping for tonight to be like from the flowers and all, and I was hoping that I was being just as obvious with how I felt about you, and… I don't know. I just… I had to tell you.” His lips pressed together so that the small divot in the side of his cheek appeared.
You didn't know how to describe the wave of emotion that washed over you. There was the rapid heart beat thundering in your ears, the tingle of relief in your shoulders, the happiness taking flight in your stomach.
“I have to be honest, I—I feel the exact same way you do.” You ducked your head, tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, “And I didn't know how to tell you either because I was really scared.” Your voice tripped, and you picked yourself back up. He waited for you, as always, patiently letting you say your piece. “I didn't want to lose you as a friend, at the very least, because you've come to mean so much to me over these past few months.”
Younghoon's smile widened and the amber color from the streetlight above haloed around his head for one dizzying second. “I didn't want to lose you either. I'm literally head over heels for you; you're every… you're everything.”
You didn't know how else to express your feelings through words, and you wrapped your arms around his middle, the flowers coming around his back to avoid being crushed. “Not good at words, sorry,” you mumbled into the fabric of his jacket.
You could feel the vibrations of his warm chuckle as he slowly wrapped his arms around you, his lips pressing against the side of your head. Message received.
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Not everything went to plan, and it was important to exercise flexibility in such times. You still snuck (broke) into the planetarium with Younghoon, hand-in-hand, but all feelings were already known and laid sprawled on the table.
There was a center platform in the main showcase hall that was carpeted in a layer of fake grass that you and Younghoon gladly lounged upon to watch the universe. The image projected above your heads now of faraway solar systems and galaxies was unfortunately not real—they were produced by a specific software rather than the lens of a telescope. It was breathtaking, nonetheless.
You laid with your back against the fake grass next to Younghoon, your arms pressed against one another. The light projecting onto the dome above filtered down and painted you both in colors of stars and dark matter, all of those swirls of oranges and purples and blues and white.
“There is one thing that's still on my mind.”
He hummed. “What's that?”
“I was wondering—and you can totally say no—but the wedding…” You glanced over at him, and you wondered if he could understand what you were probing at. “I was wondering if you'd be comfortable going as my plus one. It's just the reception, but I understand if it's a lot.”
He smiled at you, big and bright, “I'd love to go as your plus one.”
Relief and joy fluttered in your chest now. It was a miracle your heart didn't grow wings and fly out then. “Thank you, really.”
His fingers inched over yours until they intertwined as a silent acknowledgement. He knew. He always knew somehow.
In the silence, you returned your gaze up to the night sky. It was crazy how vast the universe was and how small you were in relation to it. When put into perspective, your problems here on Earth were so much smaller than the world—and yet, they were still important.
“When I was a kid,” you started to say, and heard a small sound from your right as he looked back over at you, “I wanted to touch the stars.” You turned your head to look back at him.
His lip quirked upward fondly. “Something of yours will touch the stars one day.”
“I hope so,” you mused back. That was the dream.
His eyes dropped down to your mouth now, and everything quieted, as if you were in a vacuum with only the two of you. In this reality, no one and nothing else existed.
You could feel the warmth of his breath on your skin as he leaned toward you and pressed his lips against yours. His body rolled half over yours, one hand cupping your jaw with a tenderness you were certain to become addicted to. It was your chest against his, your nose slotting beside his, your cheek beneath his thumb. His lips were a perfect marriage of pressure and softness at once.
When he pulled away, he didn't go far. “I think I just touched a star,” he murmured.
The breath in your throat hitched. “You're too good with words, Kim Younghoon.”
His eyes crinkled. “We can do something more your speed and study the space between us instead.”
You had to turn away to laugh, the sound of his own joining yours.
“Hey, it's a yes or no question,” he giggled, turning your chin back toward him. He bit his lip through a grin. “Can I kiss you again?”
You would be a fool to refuse him. In an instant, he lowered his lips over yours again, enveloped you in his embrace. And with every moment passed, you sank further and further into him. Maybe the universe was uncharted and alluring, but the universe could wait.
You had all the world right here.
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a/n: tumblr fcking hates me and my dialogue, confirmed. anyways, pls remember to reblog + comment if u enjoyed! for now, i'll see u in hot commodity!
permanent taglist: @flwoie @vatterie @seomisaho @hqrana @ja4hyvn @outrologist @rikizm @tinkerbell460 @kaaimins @hyunjaespresent-deobi @otterly-fey @zzoguri @floatingpluto @winterchimez @ethereal-engene @gyulfriend @polarisjisung @jaehunnyy @shakalakaboomboo @loveliestfelix @bless-311 @zhaixiaowen @leaz-kpop-life @amourdsr @pxppxrminty @kqyutie @sseastar-main @kxthleen14 @fluorescentloves @mosviqu @jaerisdiction @super-btstrash-posts @jundundun @http-gyu @mvvnsseul @vernonburger @maessseongs @ericlvr @mars101 @moonyswolf @your-mirae @richasdiary @sunramzi @deobi0412 @kflixnet
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miumura · 8 months ago
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— ✦ OH MY ! - BERMUDA LINE SMAU
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✦ SYNOPSIS : Despite being okay with being single, your friend Ningning can’t help but feel sad for you. So, as her job as a matchmaker, she sets you up for a blind date! Not being able to refuse, you got ready for this date … but why is there three men in front your house ?!
⤷ not one, not two, but three guys show up to your doorstep, claiming that they are your blind date.
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➷ THE DATES! — model!younghoon , model!hyunjae , model!juyeon x fem!reader
ִ ۫ ₊ MATCH IN MAKING 📄 . . : social media au, non-idol au, blind date au, strangers 2 lovers, fluff, crack.
𝄞 DETAILS — possible random timestamps, use of kys + kms jokes, friends may jokingly bully each other, will add more if there’s anything else!
… INCLUDING . . : ningning from aespa, eric + chanhee from the boyz, sieun from stayc, serim from cravity, yeonjun from tomorrow x together.
☏ NOTE - you may be wondering , um soph don’t you already have oh my posted? well, after putting it onto hold, i wanted to to revamp it a little bit (well, a lot..)! had to do my first tbz smau right!! there will definitely be some changes in this smau!! there still will be the old ver up :) enjoyyyy sjjsjs
and obviously, this smau is dedicated to kayla (whose been asking for it since last year), sia (who was thinking abt stanning tbz bc of this , i am quite honored), sona (obv!!)
STATUS — ON HOLD | FEB 26 2024 TO ???
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➷ AND THE MATCHING STARTS ⌞ CHAPTERS ⌝
ෆ PROFILES ! the lunatics [y/n] | the famous [bermuda]
DATE 001 — 0 hoes but 100% swag
DATE 002 — THE model trio
DATE 003 — some shady business
DATE 004 — errr is this the set…?
DATE 005 — truly embarrassing
DATE 006 — gut never lies
DATE 007 — living that #double life
to be added …
note : unpublished chapters may have their names changed!
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🎧— dm, ask, or comment to be tagged!
TBZ PERM TAGLIST — @flwoie @haruavrse @bearseulgs @ilovewonyo @wtfhyuck @ineedaherosavemeenow @ilovechanhee @ja4hyvn @vampcharxter
OH MY TAGLIST — @haknom @wonieleles @wvnkoi @tocupid @be0mlvr @nanadreamies @conwunder
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loserlvrss · 29 days ago
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𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐈𝐓 k. younghoon ( 김영훈 )
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synopsis | you were scared your boyfriend would be like the others, except he shows you the complete opposite when you bleed on his bed during the night.
pairing : kim younghoon x fem!reader genre : drabble, fluff warnings : tiny angst, language, period / blood mentioned a lot word count : 0.7k authors note : your man should not care, and if he does, then that’s not a man :/
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panic set in. your lungs tightening as you lifted the blanket slightly and just saw red. 
“fuck,” you groaned quietly—so very quiet as to not wake your boyfriend sleeping next to you. “are you joking?” 
it wasn’t supposed to come for two more days. you’d barely ever been early nowadays, a much higher chance of being late. it just had to happen on the night you’d slept over at his place, didn’t it? 
what was this, a cruel joke on you? maybe it was all the stress finally catching up to you.
you quickly shifted out of the gray sheets, thanking god that he didn’t have white ones—you somehow thought that that would make you feel worse. but now the question was, how would you clean this up before he woke up? 
more panic, mixed with embarrassment clouded your brain. would he think you were nasty for staining his bed like this? would he make you feel terrible for bleeding, all while you cleaned it up yourself? this had never happened to you, unless you were sleeping alone, so you had no expectations really. 
you could wake him up and tell him to immediately close his eyes, but that would be a dead giveaway; and if you know anything about your boyfriend, it’s that he wouldn’t listen to you anyways. maybe you could convince him that you cut yourself in your sleep, like that would make it any better. 
“babe?” oh, but that made it worse, tears instantly springing to your eyes. “good mor—what’s up?”
“n-nothing!” you tried to play it off, unfolding the blanket frantically to cover the spot back up. “nothing’s wrong, good morning!” 
he studied your movements, looking you up and down, and then huffing. he got from the sheets, strategically keeping the comforter down for your peace of mind. he made his way around the bed, your body stiffening when he walked beside you and pressed a kiss to your temple. 
“it’s okay, you know.” and suddenly you were hyper aware of the sticky feeling coating your thighs and lower abdomen. “let’s just—”
“i’m sorry!” you blurted, a loud—rather dramatic—sob ripping past your lips after. “i-i’ll buy you new ones, i swear. i thought it was supposed to come in two days, i-i didn’t know. i’m so sorry, younghoon, plea—”
“hey,” he cut your rant off, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder, letting it travel down your arm, finally intertwining fingers. he brought your hand to his lips, kissing it gently before going on. “i’m not upset, at all.” 
through tear-filled eyes, you replied, “are you sure?” 
he smiles softly, “of course,” and if you knew anything about him, it was that he was always a million-percent genuine when it came to you. “go take a shower, and i’ll put some clean clothes on the sink, okay?” 
“b-but the sheets,” 
“i’ll take care of it, stop worrying and go.” 
and he did take care of everything, bringing you your purse, a hoodie of his and some sweatpants; he knew where you kept extra pairs of various clothing items in his dresser. he changed the sheets while you cleaned off, putting them in the washer. he then scoured his apartment until he found a heating pad he’d forgotten that he bought, hoping it still worked (it did, he tried it) and setting it on your side of the bed. he turned your favorite show on, prepared to binge it with you for the rest of the day. 
you came out of the bathroom, fighting back another couple apologies. well, that was until you saw him sat on his freshly-changed bedding, seemingly so nonchalant and careless. you could spend your whole life with him if this is how he was going to act around something your exes would’ve grimaced away from. 
“oh, hi!” he said as you finally caught his attention, “i made you some hot chocolate, because i know you don’t like tea.” you stared wide-eyed as he further explained, getting up and walking towards you. “i found this heating pad too, i don’t know where it came from, to be honest, it was probably an old injury of mine or something—c’mere, let’s watch a show for a bit and then have breakfast, okay?” 
“i think i…” he stopped in front of you as you tried to gather the right words. piecing together every feeling he’s already given you and every feeling you know he will. 
in the meantime, he took your hand within his, ready to drag you over to his bed and press play. then he stopped when you finally finished the sentence. “love you.” 
he pulled you into a hug, taken aback, but not enough to back down. his feelings were evidently the same. 
“i know i love you.” 
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please reblog and like <3 comments are appreciated ! thank you 4 reading © loserlvrss 2024 all rights reserved. 
networks : @deoboyznet @blossomnet @starlit-network @k-films @kstrucknet
taglist : @gluion @slytherinshua @mystarsohee @hursheys @seomisaho @jihyokat | send an ask to be added.
back to masterlist !
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stealanity · 8 months ago
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playlist one , the boyz ( lsg to kvm ) :
ꕤ lee sangyeon ,
someone
[ 7:02am ]
[ 5:12pm ]
[ 6:14am ]
ꕤ bae jacob ,
summer love
birthday cake
melatonin
co-lover
white lily
ꕤ kim younghoon ,
corny jokes
reassuring hands
kinda miss you
i didn't forget
[ 1:02am ]
[ 2:45am ]
ꕤ lee hyunjae ,
suffocating ( written serie , discontinued )
this special look
stay
waffle
loser, lover
crazy
too late
only for practice
[ 9:32am ]
[ 4:35pm ]
[ 10:37pm ]
ꕤ lee juyeon ,
his s/o waking up in the middle of the night
cute little intruder
bad day, but good boyfriend
daydream
terrible idea
the bet
cold hands
risky
sick of you
[ 5:34pm ]
[ 10:45pm ]
[ 7:52pm ]
[ 8:57pm ]
ꕤ moon kevin ,
bad words
the little prince
[ 3:37pm ]
[ 11:23am ]
. . . link to maknae line !
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tinytinyblogs · 1 year ago
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Sunwoo As Your Boyfriend
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Boyfriend
(n.) A person who 90% of the time annoy you, and 10% of the time makes you forget the 90%
The boyz masterlist here #1 #2
Sunwoo is the type of boyfriend who you can lean on. He is mature, smart, and knows how to take care of you. He is also romantic and will always make you feel special. He is always there for you. He is the first person you want to call when you have good news or bad news. He is always there to listen and to offer support. He is mature and responsible. He can handle anything that comes his way, and he always puts you first. He is smart and funny. He can make you laugh even when you are feeling down. He knows how to take care of you. He will cook for you, clean for you, and do whatever he can to make your life easier. He is romantic. He will surprise you with flowers, gifts, and thoughtful gestures. He always makes you feel special. He is always honest with you. He will never lie to you or betray your trust. He is supportive of your dreams. He will always encourage you to follow your dreams and to achieve your goals. He is patient and understanding. He knows that you are not perfect, and he will always be there for you, even when you make mistakes.
Sunwoo loves to fall asleep around you. He loves the feeling of being close to you and the warmth you give him. He also loves the feeling of being safe and secure in your arms. He likes to cuddle with you. He loves the feeling of your arms around him and your body against his. He likes you to hold his hand. He loves the feeling of your hand in his and it makes him feel connected to you. Sunwoo loves the feeling of not being alone. He feels safe and secure when he is with you, and he knows that he can always count on you.
Sunwoo would obviously take you on a beach date. He loves the beach so much, and going with you would be another level of happiness for him. He loves the feeling of the sand between his toes. He would love to walk hand-in-hand with you on the beach and feel the sand between his toes. He loves the sound of the waves crashing against the shore. He would love to sit on the beach with you and listen to the waves crashing against the shore. He loves the feeling of being close to you. He would love to cuddle with you on the beach and feel your warmth against his skin. Sunwoo would also love to do some activities with you on the beach. He might want to go swimming, build sandcastles, or just relax and enjoy the view. A beach date with Sunwoo would be a perfect day. He would be so happy to spend time with you in his favorite place.
When Sunwoo spots you in a crowded place, he will ignore everyone else and make a beeline for you. He will have a sweet smile on his face and he will give you the best hug he can muster. He will tell you how much he loves to see you and how happy he is to be with you. Sunwoo will tell you how much he loves to see you in a way that makes you feel special. He will tell you how beautiful you are and how much he enjoys spending time with you.
When you're with Sunwoo, you can't help but laugh. He has a way of making you feel comfortable and relaxed, and you can always be yourself around him. You both have a lot of similarities, so it's easy to understand each other. You love to play around and tell jokes, and you always have a good time together. You might make up silly songs or dances. You'll laugh so hard that your sides hurt. You might tell each other jokes that only you find funny. You'll laugh until you cry. Sunwoo makes your day full of happiness and fun. He always knows how to make you laugh, and he always knows how to make you feel special. You love spending time with him, and you know that you can always count on him to make you smile.
Sunwoo is not afraid to show you his broken side. He will let you know when he is feeling down, and he will let you know when he is struggling. He will cry in front of you, and he will tell you all of his problems. He knows that you will listen to him and that you will help him to feel better. He trusts you. He knows that you will not judge him, and he knows that you will not tell anyone else about his problems. He needs your help. He knows that he cannot solve his problems on his own, and he needs your support. He loves you. He wants to be able to be himself around you, and he wants you to see all of him, even the broken parts. Sunwoo loves all the attention you give him when he is feeling down. He loves the way you listen to him, and he loves the way you make him feel better. He knows that he can always count on you to be there for him, and he is grateful for your love and support. When you make Sunwoo feel better after a rough day, it makes you feel good too. You feel happy that you could help him, and you feel loved that he trusts you enough to share his problems with you. You know that you are making a difference in his life, and that is a great feeling. Being there for Sunwoo when he is feeling down is a privilege. It is a sign that he trusts you and loves you, and it is an opportunity to show him how much you care. If you are lucky enough to have Sunwoo in your life, cherish him and be there for him when he needs you.
Sunwoo loves to call you randomly just to remind you that he loves you. He doesn't care what time it is, he just wants to hear your voice and tell you how much he cares. Sunwoo's random calls are a sign of his love for you. He loves you so much that he can't help but tell you how he feels, even if it's in the middle of the night.
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astroyongie · 1 month ago
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The Boyz: Where do they love for you to touch them in a smoothing way
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Hyunjae
his head is his main spot, he loves when you are stroking his hair, running your fingers through his scalp can help him low his anxiety while also soothing him. Hyunjae usually falls asleep when you do that, since he feels comfortable
Juyeon
His spot is his forehead, he especially likes when you do gentle caresses across his forehead, your fingertips barely touching to give him that tingling feeling. it gives him some feeling of comfort. Juyeon sometimes gets drolly when you touch his forehead and dozes off
Kevin
Kevin gets all blushy when you touch his ears. it has to be lightly touched or like when you are playing with his earlobes while petting his head, or when you brush your fingers on his ears when you are cupping his cheeks. he lets you remove his earrings
Younghoon
This guy is more sensitive in his legs area. he loves when you touch is thighs. running your hand up and down and giving him soft touches and a gentle squeeze on the thighs always gets him in a comforting mood. surprinsingly, it doesnt make him horny, it truly calms Younghoon
Changmin
Changmin is proud of his arms somehow and he finds it comforting when you touch his biceps. Running your hands along his arms can be comforting and he always gets so relaxed when you guys are chilling and you just petting his arms. grab it while you walk with him, makes him feel happy
Haknyeon
he is a simply man and thus his cheeks are his sensitive spot. softly touching and cupping Haknyeon cheeks during a kiss can be affectionate to him and it puts him in such soft mood. bite them too to make him whine and he will. he finds the touch to be very intimate
Sunwoo
you want to smooth him? just get your hands on his shoulders. Massaging Sunwoo's shoulders so you can relieve tension that has been here for the couple days. he will groan and moan in relaxation and becomes so smoothed out when you do so
Sangyeon
This man loves when you touch his stomach. you can gently rub his abs when he is upset to smooth him or light pressure touches can be comforting when he is feeling more sad. Lay your head there or just let your hand rest on his stomach and he will be content
Chanhee
Chanhee just needs a few kisses on his neck and he wont yap for the next hour. Light touches and massages on his neck are relaxing to him and it can put him to sleep as well as it's a very sensitive spot on him.
Eric
His spot are his hands, just holding his hands, or lightly stroking your fingers over his palms, can feel intimate to Eric to the point where he becomes quiet and all soft. Lace and interwine you fingers with him to get him all smoothed out
Jacob
when he is upset or stressed out he lies on his stomach, so thats when you have to run the back of his head. Gentle strokes and resting a hand there can be comforting to Jacob. just play with his hair and he will be content
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riizewrtr · 8 months ago
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can you describe tbz members with sex positions and where they usually do it?
oOooO i like this hehe i won't link any positions or pictures so you'll have to look them up yourself, lol sorry! maybe i will later when i'm not too busy!
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Sangyeon likes doggystyle, he loves being able to grab your hair while he's thrusting into you and loves the way your ass jiggles, and mostly only enjoys sex at home in the safety of his bed
Jacob sorry but i see him as a normal missionary guy, he loves how intimate it is, being able to see the way your face scrunches in pleasure, being able to give you full on love and kisses while making love. like sangyeon he isn't too risky and would rather do it at home
younghoon likes the grasshopper, being able to still hold you but by the leg/thigh. he finds it sexy and it helps when he's a bit tired but still wanting to fuck you. likes it at home, if it's a quicky he can do it in a closet or bathroom max. nothing too crazy
hyunjae likes the lotus <3 it's very intimate and loving. he loves holding you and hugging you while he's making love to you. you would mostly do this position on a couch, he also likes to only fuck at home.
juyeon likes the cowgirl, he LOVES being rode!!! but he can still take over by thrusting his hips into you. i can see juyeon if he's REALLY needy he would do it in a closet or a bathroom, but likes to do many positions so would rather do it in a bed.
kevin i can see him liking 69 mostly during foreplay! but while fucking he likes the bodyguard, so standing while fucking! he can also carry you and fuck you standing since he likes showing how much he's been working out hehe so he can fuck anywhere especially if he's needy
chanhee is also like Jacob, he likes something intimate as missionary or maybe spooning, where it's really close and an intimate setting where you can just feel each other to the fullest. i can see chanhee only wanting to make love and not FUCK where he would go hardcore!! only fucks at home
changmin would like the butterfly, so he likes fucking you flat on your back while your legs are on his shoulders on a flat surface. so he can fuck in the kitchen or in the dining room on the table. he loves kissing and squeezing your thighs so your legs on his shoulders is heaven for him
haknyeon likes the flatiron position, he loves forcing you down on the bed. not face down ass up JUST FLAT!! he likes taking control and having that control over you. he likes how hard or soft he can go in that position and it makes your pussy a little bit tighter than usual since your legs aren't as fully spread so he enjoys it he can do a quicky bending you over in a closet max no where too crazy
sunwoo would love the joyride, it's similar to cowgirl except your feet/legs are by his head!! the way you grind against him is absolute heaven for him. he just loves the feeling of his cock grinding and moving around in your tight cunt. also likes it at home
eric also likes doggystyle but he can do it on the stairs at home, so bending you over the stairs and fucking the shit out of you there, where he can also hold you around the waist to give you sweet little kisses while groaning sweet nothings against your lips while fucking up into you <3
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fics-lovebot · 10 months ago
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the boyz fic recs
main masterlist
· · ♡ · · tysm to the amazing creative minds of the writers for giving me sevaral moments of joy reading your creations
i´ll be constantly updating this list so make sure to check it out often for new recs ;)))
pls remember to reblog if you like any of my recs❤️
ot11/poly
sunwoo
a hidrance to peace - crack, fluff, you suddenly realize once again that he fucked around with other ppl before meeting you, atrocious tbh HDCLIHFISH i love it, sunwoo gets jealous and its cutee
he´s jealous of juyeon taking selfies on your phone, text au
six-thirty - smut, fwb, possessive!sunwoo, lotss of dirty talking, he need some milk
boyfriend sunwoo is just so :(((((((((((((((((( I LOVE HIM
eric
swing my way - crack, fluff, eric is a young heir with a lot of money and a thing for pretty girl, you just happen to be a pretty girl working at the country club his family partially owns, I LOVE THISSS, it was such a refreshing, fun thing to read. I love the flirting, the gossip, the plot had me smiling the whole time
text au 1, text au 2 - love these
juyeon
running through the rain (for you) -FLUFF, he wanted to be romantic waiting for you under the rain, this made my heart CRY bc why is he so precious?? :( my mf baby
befriend the kitty -fluff, school au, bad boy x good girl trope, strangers to friends to lovers, it´s cute
split it open - smut, juyeon has a big dicc, reader is cock starved lmao, it´s short but it´s hot
classifieds - smut, android!juyeon, dirty talk, love the plot
hyunjae
changmin (Q)
changmin texting his idol crush - text au
a closer look - fluff, changmin doesn´t know what to do when you flirt with him so he´s breaking up with you sjsjdkdjskjd
new
simple gifts - fluff, slow burn, model!chanhee, assistant!reader, he´s soooo in love lmao, his love language is putting you in expensive clothes and accesories, this is such a nice read, not boring at all, love love love loved it
haknyeon
younghoon
kevin
jacob
sangyeon
face sitting - smut, e.r, idol!sang, he lit came in his pants from eating pussy,,, “Use my mouth, make yourself come all over my face.” WHEWW
like that - smut, fluff, another one about sangyeon eating pussy and i´m not even surprised, you know what they say about men with big noses,,,LFHUERIHRL.SUDHF lemme stop
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sangyeonsmuse · 3 months ago
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— SHES WITH THE BAND ★
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“FUCK ME LIKE A ROCKSTAR DANCING ON A COP
CAR NOTHING IN THE WORLD CAN STOP ME NOW”
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Groupie love series, idols as Rockstars.
(ATEEZ, TXT, THE BOYZ)
GROUPIE L♥️VE TOUR
Please make sure to show your tickets upon entry, to those of you that purchased a backstage pass, line up outside after the show.
‼️ WARNING 18+ CONTENT MINORS DNI ‼️
★ Day 1 - Pretty Little Thing (sunwoo,haknyeon,hyunjae,juyeon,eric)
★ Day 2 - Avalon (Lee Sangyeon)
★ Day 3 - Under The Influence (Lee Juyeon)
★ Day 4 - Two- Faced (Bae Jacob)
★ Day 5 - Thrillride (Kim Younghoon)
★ Day 6 - One Of The Girls (Lee Hyunjae)
★ Day 7 - Meddle About (Kim Sunwoo, Eric Sohn)
★ Day 8 - Floor 22 (Kevin Moon)
★ Day 9 - Attention (Choi Chanhee)
★ Day 10 - Repay Me (Ji Changmin)
★ Day 11 - Home Movies (Ju Haknyeon)
★ Day 12 - Welcome To The Band ( WooSan) intro
★ Day 13 - Fill The Void (Woosan)
★ Day 14
★ Day 15
★ Day 16
★ Day 17
★ Day 18
★ Day 19
★ Day 20
★ Day 21
★ Day 22
★ Day 23
★ Day 24
★ Day 25
★ Day 26
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itsbeeble · 11 months ago
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LET LOOSE
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SUMMARY: Younghoon has hated you since the day he met you. He thought you were stuck up with that better-than-you princess attitude of yours. What better than to just…fuck it right out of you?
GENRE: smut, fluff, angst, crack
PAIRING: Kim Younghoon x afab!reader (ft. eric)
WC: 5.3K
SERIES MASTERLIST
PERM TAGLIST: @juyeonszn @winterchimez
18+ MDNI AGELESS BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED
WARNINGS: Swearing, public sex, floor sex, academic rivals that everyone knows secretly want to fuck, enemies to lovers, missionary (that's a first wow), sexual references, mentions of alcohol, insults (not sexual), arguments, pining, mentions of killing someone as a joke, dry humping for like two seconds, making out, mentions of marking, mentions of oral, guys i think this is the least slutty fic I've written for this series, y/n is stuck in a perpetual state of denial, let me know if I missed anything but i think that's it
A/N: Everyone allow me to introduce Doll's less-slutty cousin!! I can't believe we're over halfway through this collab omg. I'm really glad people are loving this and I hope you guys have been catching the easter eggs me and Fawn have been throwing into our fics 😏
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If anyone asked you what you thought of when you thought of local star student, heartthrob, and frat boy Kim Younghoon, you would scoff and cross your arms over your chest. 
“I hate him,” you would say, your lips pursed and eyebrows furrowed until they were practically touching. “I hope his house burns to the fucking ground.” 
One would think this was a gross overreaction, that you probably held a grudge over something stupid, or that he killed your dog or maybe he copied off your essay but made it seem like you were the one who plagiarized. And oh, how that would’ve been much simpler. 
The true story, however, goes all the way back—
“Thinking about me again?” A hand cracks down on the desk in front of you, your mind and body jerking back to reality. 
There he is, you think to yourself, the bane of my fucking existence. Your teeth are already grinding together, your grip tightening around the pencil you’d been using to write your notes and all he’s doing is standing there with a stupid fucking smirk. 
“Why would I be thinking of you?” You bite out and Younghoon places a hand over his heart in mock hurt.
“Ouch, sweetheart.” Your body stiffens and your face contorts with disgust at the nickname.
“Don’t call me that, douchebag.” Younghoon sighs dramatically, dropping down to be at eye level with you. 
“So cruel to me,” a pout, and then he’s smirking again. “What if I was into that, sweetheart?” 
You might throw up.
“What do you want?” you groan, noting how other students have begun to flood out of the lecture hall while you’re putting your things away. Younghoon shrugs, rising to his feet at the same time as you. Had you been a weaker woman, his height would’ve had your knees wobbling and your panties hitting the ground but, fortunately, you were a strong woman. Some of your friends couldn’t relate to that despite your very clear and very much valid hatred for him. 
“I just wanted to see what you were up to,” he shoves his hands into his pockets, rocking back onto his heels. “Considering that we’re now partners for this assignment.”
Your heart drops into your stomach, your eyes widen, and your cheeks are fighting between going pale and burning bright as a tomato.
“What are you— what do you mean we’re partners?” You echo, and his smirk only widens. Your shoulder bashes into his arm while you make your way to the front of the lecture hall where the list of partners is posted. He trails behind you, long legs making it easy to keep pace despite how impossibly fast you seem to walk.
“Aren’t you so excited?” He sounds too excited about this, and you have to physically stop yourself from grabbing him by the neck and choking him where he stands. “We get to work together for the whole semester!”
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“I still don’t see how this is a problem,” Dawon tells you her tongue running over her lip as she watches you pace the length of your dorm suite’s lounge area. “Isn’t he, like, super hot? And smart?”
Your lip curls into a sneer and you whip your body around to look at her.
“He is not hot,” your voice has raised in pitch, your arms waving frantically. “He’s— he’s stupid and— and annoying, and he doesn’t know how to shut up, and his face— oh his face is just so— so—”
“Kissable?” Suyeon offers when she makes her way over with a steaming mug of tea. 
“I think rideable is a better word,” Dawon grins at the way your jaw drops at the two of them. 
“He does have a very rideable—”
“Okay, enough!” You snap, your face beginning to burn bright red in anger.
“Ooh she’s blushing!” Suyeon giggles and your face only burns brighter. 
“You both are insufferable,” you throw yourself back onto the couch, your head turned toward the ceiling. “Kim Younghoon is annoying, stuck up, and his face is not kissable or rideable.” 
“So you’re saying you’ve thought about it before?” Suyeon presses and you roll your eyes.
“Hell no. Why would I think about that?”
“Because he’s your mortal enemy and everyone ends up fucking their mortal enemy at some point.”
“Plus he’s a yummy, scrumptious, daddy cupcake.”
“Ugh, so true Dawon.” Suyeon squeezes your roommate’s hand, the two of them grinning deviously at each other.
“That’s— did you just call him— No, that’s not the point. The point is, that’s not true!” You lift your head, eyes wide with horror. “That only happens in books!”
“Not just books,” Suyeon raises her mug to her lips with a hint of a smirk on her face. “Didn’t you hear about the KAT and TBZ presidents?” 
“Oh my god, Eric told me about that!” Dawon gasps. “Apparently they—”
“I don’t need to know the details of their sex lives.” You interrupt again. “God, you two are just…”
“Don’t you just love us?” Dawon winks at you, and you wrinkle your nose in distaste.
“Let’s not go that far.” Her lips twist, and the three of you go quiet for a moment. 
“Why do you even hate him?” 
Ah, there it is. The same question everyone had been asking since the day you started at this school. 
Why do you hate Kim Younghoon? 
“It’s complicated,” you tell them what you always say. You tell them that it’s nothing they should be concerned about. He knows what he did.
“Then uncomplicate it.” Suyeon is much softer than Dawon, her eyes furrowed but not with the mild irritation Dawon has. It’s more…concern than anything else, and for a moment you think about telling them. Think about dropping your petty act, let them know exactly what about Younghoon bothers you so much. 
You open your mouth, and the two girls in front of you lean forward expectantly, practically on the edge of the tiny couch that had been squeezed into the suite.
“I can’t.”
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“That isn’t going to work, sweetheart.” Younghoon says, waltzing up to you after your failed attempt to talk your professor into letting you change partners or work alone. Your shoulders are slumped in defeat, something that Younghoon seems to laugh at. “You’re stuck with me.”
“I really hate you, Kim Younghoon.” You lift your head, wanting so desperately to glare at him but you can only find the strength to stare blankly. He kisses his teeth, eyebrows furrowing.
“That’s a bit harsh, isn’t it?” 
“Who cares? It’s true.” 
You want to scream. You want to throw your body onto the ground and throw a tantrum, to cry and whine, to kick and punch the air—anything to get out of this situation. 
“All this because I got a better grade than you in one class in high school.” Younghoon shakes his head, his hair falling into his face and obscuring his eyes partially. Your heart thuds against your ribcage (because of the memory, obviously). 
“You really think that’s the only reason I hate you?” Hint: he’s right for once. Would you ever tell him that? No. As far as he knows, you have endless reasons to hate him. As long as he lives, that list will grow. In fact, it would be better if he knew that you’d be pissed if he died before you because that means he tried to escape one last competition, but you’d hate it even more if he died after you because that means he would win one last time.
“That’s all I can think of,” he shrugs and you kiss your teeth. 
“Disappointing me again, douchebag.” He scoffs at that.
“Of course I am. When am I not upsetting you about some bullshit?” 
Oddly, this time you don’t answer him. At least you don’t give him an answer to that question. 
“Listen, Kim Younghoon,” you place a hand on your hip, shifting your weight to lean mostly on one leg. He leans toward you a bit, slightly angling his head as if trying to hear you better. “You’re the most annoying, egotistical, snobbish boy I’ve ever met. You always have this, like, need to be better than me— than everyone.” 
Younghoon inhales, his eyebrows knitting together and his tongue poking the inside of his cheek. You can see the irritation in his gaze, can see him fighting the urge to snap at you and it has your stomach churning. When he finally responds, it’s not exactly what you expected. You thought he would snap back at you, tell you to go fuck yourself, to call you the same insults you just called him.
He doesn’t.
“Meet me in the library at 4 o’clock.” Your head jerks back, your nose wrinkling with confusion. 
“Excuse me?” Younghoon just smiles coyly, already turning away from you.
“Don’t you wanna get this project done so you don’t have to deal with me?” He can practically see the wheels turning in your brain, contemplating all your options. 
“I mean yeah, but how do you know if I’m even free—”
“You’re always at the cafe at the same time as me,” Younghoon glances down at you, stepping to the side as he pushes open the door of the lecture hall. You say nothing as you push by him. “I’m starting to think you’re obsessed with me, sweetheart.”
“That’s not— I would never— how—” You sputter, stumbling over your words and waving your hands in the air while you try to come up with something to say. Something to deny. Younghoon begins to smile again, coy and near-mocking. 
“I don’t hear you actively denying anything.” His eyes widen and he bends forward, lowering his face to be near yours. Your cheeks are heating up, your mouth opening and closing like a goldfish. Words. You need words. Why is nothing coming out?
“Shut the hell up, douchebag.” He laughs and your stomach churns again. Is he laughing at you?
“I’ll see you at 4, sweetheart.” Younghoon starts to reach his hand toward you as he leans up, but thinks better of it and drops it back to his side. 
“Yeah, sure,” you scoff and turn your back to him.
Fucking prick.
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“You have got to be kidding me,” You toss a stack of papers onto the table you’re sitting at, glaring at the notes Younghoon wrote on the whiteboard. He’d rented a study room for a few hours, giving you time to start working. 
Or, at least, try to start working. You had made no promises about not trying to kill him and making it so neither of you could get any work done. Although, you had thought about running him over with your car so that you would have an excuse to work on this alone.
The blinds over the door had been shut, blocking anyone from looking in and potentially seeing you try to kill a man. Lucky for you.
“What’s so wrong with what I wrote?” He squints at the board and you push yourself out of the old, creaky chair you’d been sitting in. 
“It’s contradictory!” You complain, reaching around him for the eraser. He grabs your hand before you can do anything, turning on you with a scathing glare. 
“It’s not, though!” 
His grip tightens on your wrist when you pull it away. You narrow your eyes, but he doesn’t waver at all. There’s heat behind his gaze, heat that makes you nervous. You know he won’t hurt you, that’s not who he is. The heat though…that makes you nervous. It’s the same heat you’d felt several times in the past few weeks. 
“Let me go, Kim Younghoon.” He leans his head toward yours and your throat begins to close, your heart pounding in your chest.
“Not until you tell me why it’s contradictory!” He snaps. You swear your ears start to ring, your vision closing in until all you can see is Younghoon. 
“It’s— why does it matter so much to you?” His grip finally loosens and you rip away from him with a huff. 
“Because you’re putting down my work! Again!” He flings his hands into the air and you bite your tongue. “Why do you hate me so much?”
A lump in your throat, tears in your eyes, and Younghoon drops your hand. He looks defeated, his shoulders slumping and his lips set into a deep frown. 
“I just,” Younghoon sits in his chair, the old wood creaking under his weight. You stand in the middle of the study room, hands by your sides and your eyes flicking around nervously. Your posture is so tense compared to his, your eyes flitting around anxiously. “I’m tired of this shit. Not knowing what the fuck I did wrong. You never give me a reason and, at first, I was fine with it. I liked the casual rivalry. But now I’m just…it’s been four years, and I still don’t know what I did.”
“Choi Yuna.” It comes out fast, the name of your ex-best friend. So fast that Younghoon doesn’t catch it, he just stares at you with a look of pure confusion.
“What?”
You say her name slower this time, tugging at the edge of your shirt. “Choi Yuna, you dated her from freshman year until late sophomore year.” 
“Okay, yeah,” he leans forward with his elbows on his knees. “What does she have to do with this?” 
Your cheeks are burning, and you know he can see it. See how flustered you are.
“She was my best friend.” You bite on your tongue, trying to find the right words. 
“I know,” he said, and you purse your lips. “She talked about you all the time.”
“That’s funny,” you scoff, a spark of anger returning to your tone and to your facial features. “Considering she’s the reason I hated you for so long.”
“What are you talking about, sweetheart?” Younghoon huffs, rubbing at his eyes with his palms. You can tell he’s frustrated, so you speak quicker.
“She— she knew that I liked you.” His eyes snap up, wide and bulging. “She knew that I wanted to ask you out in freshman year, so she made sure to get there first. I— at first I thought that you knew that’s why she did it.”
“You thought that I knew your best friend wanted—” Younghoon huffs and rises to his feet. 
“Just—” You hold up your hands as he begins to step toward you, slowly backing you into the wall. “Just let me talk. I thought you knew, yes. She told me that you asked her out first and that she just— she just agreed. So yeah, I started to hate you. I started arguing with you and every answer you gave in class because I was just so…angry at— at everything, at myself.”
Your back is against the wall now, and you’re slowly curling in on yourself as Younghoon gets closer. 
“And…?” he cocks an eyebrow and your swallow thickly.
“By the time I realized that it was all her….at that point it was just easier to keep hating you. To keep everything at bay.”
“Everything?” He echoes and had you been looking at his face instead of his chest, you would’ve seen the smirk you’d always claimed to hate plastered onto his face. 
“Yes,” you groan and lift your head. Your breathing hitches in your throat, your body pushing even closer to the wall when you finally see just how close Younghoon is to you. 
Just a few inches from your face is his own, his eyes dancing from your eyes to your lips. His breathing is, compared to yours, slow and even. Inhale, hold, exhale. You can see his chest rising and falling with the rhythm. 
“Why—” you clear your throat. “Why are you so close to me, Younghoon?”
“No legal name this time?” He murmurs, one of his hands coming up to rest on the wall beside your head. His head dips down and now his lips are brushing against yours, every breath you take mixing with his. “What happened?”
“I just— you’re a little close to me.” Your hand presses on his chest, but it's as if you aren’t even trying to push him away. “We— we probably shouldn’t.”
Younghoon kisses his teeth, shaking his head at your suggestion. Arguably, it’s a wise choice, but right now he has you exactly where he wants you. If he lets you leave now, who’s to say you won’t pack your bags and take a one-way flight to Brazil?
“I’ve been waiting,” he says and you squeeze the hand on his chest into a fist. “For three years for you to get your head out of your ass. I’m not letting you go now that I have you.”
“Have me?” Your tone shifts into one of challenge rather than the nervous air you’d surrounded yourself with. “If anything, I have you, Kim Younghoon.”
You yank him to you by his shirt, reaching up on your tip toes to place a firm kiss on his plush lips. You hear a groan rumbling in his throat, the hand not on the wall wrapping around your waist and squeezing tightly. Your lips mesh together, but it isn’t messy. It’s slow, calculated just like every move either of you had made against each other. Every argument, every challenge. The build-up. It all led to this, and you’re not letting him go this time. He’s yours and Choi Yuna can’t take him this time. 
With a new fervor, both of your hands come to lace into his thick strands of black hair, effectively trapping his lips against yours. He drops the hand that was on the wall, both hands now on your waist and sipping under the loose fabric of your shirt. You gasp at the cold feeling of his hands on your skin, and he takes that opportunity to sneak his tongue into your mouth. It’s experimental, the way his tongue caresses yours, pushing gently and letting you suck at the warm muscle. He listens to the pretty little whimper you let out when he does the same thing in return and a shiver runs down his spine. His hand slides up the back of your shirt, emerging from the collar and lacing into the strands of your hair. 
Air. You had to come up for air. You needed to breathe. Your lungs are aching, but fuck his lips are addicting. They’re soft, and warm, and they feel so good against yours. 
Your knees cave slightly, your mind going fuzzy and Younghoon rips away from you to steady your body, his knee shoved between your legs to help keep you upright. 
“Sweetheart,” his tone is lighthearted, but you know he’s scolding you. “You need to learn to breathe. I’m not leaving just because you need some air.” 
A pretty little whine escapes you, but Younghoon is quick to realize that it’s not because you can’t find the words to respond to him. Well, if you think about it, that kind of was the reason. 
Your hips are rolling down on his knee, your hands gripping his shoulder for dear life as you ride his thigh. Your head is rolled to the side, your eyes squeezed shut as you try to find the right pace and the right amount of pleasure to ease your arousal. Younghoon’s jaw drops, and he feels his dick twitch in his pants at the sight of you trying so desperately to relieve yourself on him. Unfortunately for you, he notes, your jeans seem to be in the way of you achieving your pleasure. 
“Sweetheart,” he coos but his voice is shaky and he thanks god that you’re too far gone to notice. “Look at you, trying so hard to get yourself off.” 
You whine, and his breathing hitches when you try to ride him even harder. 
“Is it not enough?” He presses and your eyes fly open with the quick nod of your head. But then you shake it, and his heart clenches at the confused furrow of your brow.
“‘S not!” You whine. “Need more, Hoonie.” 
He smiles when you reach one of your hands down, undoing the button of your jeans and trying desperately to shove them down as far as they can physically go without interrupting your ministrations. To your dismay, they barely get anywhere before Younghoon has to set you down and starts to tug them down your legs gently. 
You never thought you would enjoy watching a man get down on his knees for you, never thought you could have this much of a reaction to it. Younghoon though…the sight of him looking up at you through his lashes, the nearly pathetic look in his eyes when he sees just how soaked your panties are— it’s enough to have you practically crumbling to the ground, your lips crashing against his again and forcing him back to lay on the ground. 
His hands are everywhere— your hair, your hips, your ass, anywhere he can reach. He squeezes the soft flesh of your ass when your lips trail down his neck, sucking little marks into the skin and pulling groans and quiet whimpers from his throat. 
Your hands run under his shirt, and he weakly tries to help you push it over his head to be tossed somewhere else. You shush him, a playful look in your eye as you place a finger on his lips. 
“Gotta be quiet now,” you unbutton his jeans, slowly dragging them and his boxers down and he lifts his hips to help you slide them down to his knees. He doesn’t bother with your shirt but makes quick work of your bra and shoves it up. You’re sliding your panties down your legs when he shoves his hands under your shirt, squeezing and tugging at the soft mounds of flesh on your chest. A quiet moan at the feeling of him tugging at your nipples, and his hands falter momentarily when you wrap your hand around the base of his cock.
“Don’t hurt yourself,” he teases and you scoff while lining him up with your sopping wet pussy. You know he’s big, both of you do, but you’d never admit that to his face. Never admit that you’re nervous about taking it all in, nervous that you won’t be able to take him at all.
“As if your little dick could possibly hurt me—” your voice catches and he watches with strained amusement as you begin to sink down on him. Your walls are tight around him, practically squeezing the life out of his poor cock while you try so desperately to keep sliding down on him. Younghoon pulls his hands out of your shirt, sliding them down to your hips and gently rubbing them as a means to ease your discomfort.
“What were you saying about my little dick?” Younghoon sneers and you have to fight back the whine that threatens to slip out of you. He’s just over halfway in when you force yourself to give up, the stretch beginning to be too much for you to handle. “I could’ve prepped you, y’know? Made this easier for us both.”
You can only lower your head onto his shoulder, biting harshly into the skin while he flips you around and pushes your legs up toward your chest. 
“Hold these here, sweetheart.” You do as he says, gasping sharply when he begins to sink into you. 
“Fuck, Younghoon!” 
“Shhh,” he kisses you gently while continuing to press into you, using the width of his shoulders to gently spread your legs a bit further apart. “‘M almost there, I promise.”
“‘S too much,” you whimper, a tear slipping out of your eye and dripping onto the carpeted floor below you. “‘S too much, Hoonie.”
“I know sweetheart,” he coos and looks down at where the two of you are connected. He fights the sudden urge to cum when he sees the fluttering of your walls, sees them clenching around him, and trying to force him out. “I’m almost there.” 
Another whine from you and he quickly slides the last three inches into you, clapping a hand over your mouth to muffle the scream you release. He stays still for a moment, listening to the sound of you sniffling, and turns his head briefly to look at the door. A shadow passes by and he exhales quietly. 
“And you were worried about me being too loud. Who’s the one with a hand over her mouth, hm?” You can’t don’t respond and Younghoon pulls out entirely, leaving just the tip inside of you, and when you whine and let go of one of your legs to reach out for him, he sinks into you in one harsh thrust. 
The moan you let out behind Younghoon’s hand is guttural, and your back arches off the floor. His thrusts are rapid, yet he doesn’t falter in pattern. He sinks deep inside of you, punching into you so deep that you swear he’s going to hit your cervix. He lets his hand drop from your mouth listening to the way you try to hold back your noises. Every whine, every whimper and moan and cry, you try so hard for him. 
“Such a good girl,” he coos. “Keeping quiet and letting me fuck her real good.” His voice is so quiet, the words practically hissed into your ear and it’s so hot that your eyes roll into the back of your head. 
Your grip on your legs loosens and then your hands drop them entirely, letting them fall onto his sturdy shoulders. He watches as both of your hands disappear under your shirt and he feels a pang of irritation as you begin to play with your nipples. They draw sharper noises out of you, higher in pitch and slightly louder. Although, Younghoon can’t complain when the combined pleasure has your cunt fluttering around him and fresh waves of arousal washing through you to make it easier for him to fuck in and out of you.
“Hoon,” your whine is loud. Too loud. “So close, please!” 
Younghoon hushes you again, his hand running up the side of your leg and squeezing at the flesh of your thigh. 
“I know, sweetheart,” he tells you. “You gotta be quiet f’ me. Gotta be quiet so nobody walks in, okay?” 
“I can’t.” You sob out and Younghoon pushes himself closer to you, practically folding you in half so he can kiss you. You open up immediately, whining and letting him slide his tongue in for you to suck on.
Younghoon’s hips begin to stutter, his body shaking against yours, but you’re closer. Your body spasms, and you nip at his tongue to keep him close to you while you cum. Younghoon grunts at the combined feeling of your bites and the clenching of your walls around his length. It’s all a bit too much and it only takes a few more thrusts before he’s shuddering and collapsing against you, spilling ropes of white hot cum inside of you. 
He can feel the combination of his and your cum beginning to squeeze out of you around the tight fit of his dick inside of you, but he doesn’t have the strength to pull out of you just yet. You’ve stopped biting at him, your eyes squeezed shut and your mouth slowly sucking at the warm muscle he continues to provide you. 
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Your body is sore, your thighs aching and likely bruised when you walk into your dorm a few hours later. You hadn’t gotten any work done after that, spending the rest of the time making out in a chair and grinding on each other like some damn horny teenagers. You know you’re a disaster, but you’re more than content with that knowing that Younghoon looks the same (if not worse). 
When the door clicks shut, it’s dark in the suite and you silently thank god that Dawon and Suyeon are asle—
“Where the fuck have you been?”
The lights flick on to reveal your two friends at the counter in the suite’s living area. Dawon looks furious, but Suyeon looks like she just wants to go to be. You grimace, dropping your bag off your shoulder and onto the ground next to you. 
“Out.” Your voice is hoarse and you grimace. You imagine your throat is a little bit bruised from…things.
“Doing what.” Dawon snaps.
“Or who, judging by the looks of you.” Suyeon clicks her tongue and rises from the couch. “Look at you! It looks like someone tried to eat you!” 
Dawon squints at you, and you turn your gaze to the floor. 
“You fucked him, didn’t you?” She inquires, but you both already know the answer. 
“Who?” Suyeon frowns. “Who did she fuck?”
Your nose wrinkles, and you turn to her with a look that says I think you know. Suyeon tilts her head, her eyebrows knitting together in thought. 
“Oh.”
“Yeah.” 
“Oh. OH— OH MY GOD—”
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The Tau Beta Zeta frat house isn’t as bad as you thought it would be. At least not party-wise. The moment you and your friends walk in, you’re engulfed in noise, drunk partygoers, and scattered members of the frat. In one corner you can see what looks like two members of the frat making out with their girlfriends. Haknyeon and Changmin, Dawon said, Too bad they couldn’t find a private space. Damn exhibitionists. A smile quirks on your lips just slightly. Oh, if only she knew the truth.
You barely acknowledge her, however, scanning the room for Younghoon. 
“Eric!” You grab the passing boy by the arm and he jerks to a stop, nearly spilling the contents of two cups. 
“Yo!” He grins at you, and you can just faintly see the crinkle of his eyes under the red baseball cap of his. “What’s up?”
“Have you seen Younghoon?” Eric purses his lips in thought.
“You aren’t gonna kill him, right?” You laugh and so does he.
“No, not anymore. Or…I might if he doesn’t show up soon—”
“BOO!” Someone’s hands wrap around your waist lifting you off the ground and spinning you as you scream for him to put you down. Eric slips away, casting his eyes behind him to watch you and Younghoon as he approaches a girl in the corner. 
“Kim Younghoon!” You snap, swatting him upside the head. Your boyfriend smirks at you, bending down to try and give you a kiss that you block. “Don’t kiss me, you douche! That wasn’t funny!”
“It was kinda funny,” he laughs, swooping in to give a kiss that you choose not to block this time. It’s deep and slow, and he tilts his head to get a better taste of you when you bring your hand to the back of his neck. 
“Mmm, I think I like it when you don’t hate me.” He murmurs when he pulls back, grinning wickedly when you place a kiss on the corner of his mouth. 
“Do you now?” 
“Mhm.”
“Shouldn’t have scared me then.” You scowl, turning away from him and beginning to stalk away. He scrambles after you, frantically trying to keep up despite the crowd. 
“Where are you going?” He whines, grasping at your fingertips. You turn your head, a coy smile playing on your lips. 
“We gotta let loose, don’t we? We’re a little tense right now.” 
A puddle of drool is practically forming in Younghoon’s mouth and he’s suddenly in front of you, moving with a renewed fervor. 
When the door of the third bedroom on the right of the third floor shuts and clicks locked, nobody questions it. Not the thumping, nor the loud grunts and moans. 
When someone needs to let loose, people know better than to interrupt. Especially when it’s Younghoon and his former-crush-turned-enemy-turned-girlfriend.
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© itsbeeble. do not steal, claim, or repost.
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cupidjyu · 1 year ago
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jealousy, jealousy
(hyung line) when they get jealous over another member
genre: jealousy, jealousy, jealousy, a lot of kissing, hyunjae is a buff fool in this, im pretty sure you get yanked or yank him in each of these for some reason, slow dancing!!! shy! sangyeon! notes: eric summer fic🫥 word count: 1.7k
sangyeon
“Sangyeon?”
You poked your head outside of the door. Your boyfriend immediately looked up, his hair slightly damp from sweat and his previously focused expression quickly became a foolish, very-in-love one.
“Hi there,” He greeted, his eyes bright simply at the sight of you. He approached you, pulling you into a tight hug. “I missed you.”
“Eugh,” You groaned, pushing him off. “I have your drink balanced in my hand and you’re all sweaty from dance.”
He pouted and took the iced americano from you. “You didn’t say it back.”
You looked at him in disbelief for a second before sighing in defeat. “I missed you too.”
“That’s what I wanted to hear,” He sang, leaning in to press a kiss to your cheek. You laughed bashfully, turning your head slightly. That was when you noticed another man, staring intently at himself in the mirror.
“Hyunjae,” You called out with a wave. 
He turned around and he immediately broke out into a friendly smile. “Y/n!” His voice was bright and loud as usual as he approached the two of you. “Actually, now would be a good opportunity to ask you a question.”
You tilted your head.
And to your surprise, he rolled up his sleeve to show off his entire arm. “Do you think I got more muscular?” 
You lifted an eyebrow. Hyunjae whined as he brought his sleeve back down.
“Why are you asking me?”
“Because I need another opinion. I worked out a lot for the past few weeks,” He explained. You thought for a second. As a perfectly good, moral friend, you replied earnestly.
“I see a lot of progress.” You patted his shoulder. “Your arm… muscles look great.”
Hyunjae nodded in satisfaction. “I treasure your opinion.” And then he was off to buy a snack from the vending machine. With an amused smile, you turned back to Sangyeon, only to be met with the most adorable pout in the world. His eyebrows were furrowed as he searched your eyes with sorrow.
“Sangyeon?”
“What about me?”
You paused. And then you burst out into laughter. But, before you could respond, he was pulling you out and into the hallway. You watched him with a fond smile.
“Jealous?” 
He only replied with an embarrassed silence. You chuckled.
“I think that your muscles are amazing,” You exaggerated. Sangyeon groaned, leaning forward to pull you into a hug so that he could hide his face.
“What else do you like?” He whispered. In the corner of your eye, you could see that the tips of his ears were red.
“Mmm…” You hummed. “Your lips?”
He pulled away at that, and he gazed at you, or moreover–your lips–with a sultry expression. “Oh really?” He muttered, leaning in. You sputtered slightly, completely forgetting your past remark about him being sweaty. In fact, he looked very attractive like this. 
And before you could even say a “yes,” he was already leaning in, pressing a deep kiss to yours. 
jacob
Humming happily to yourself, you and Jacob were cuddling in bed until you were interrupted by an excited yell from the living room.
“Y/n!” Kevin’s voice called out loudly. “C’mere! There’s a new music video!”
You widened your eyes, turning to look at Jacob who was only staring back at you with soft eyes. He always said that he enjoyed seeing you happy and excited.
“Go,” He mumbled. You smiled and practically jumped out of his arms to run over to Kevin who had turned on the video of your shared favorite music artist. The two of you laughed hysterically as you watched and soon enough, you found yourself dancing with him, holding up fake microphones to sing. 
Grasping hands, jumping up and down, you and Kevin, as perfectly good best friends, danced to the music. Little did you know, Jacob was watching from around the corner. Though he half enjoyed watching you have fun, he also half didn’t enjoy seeing you have fun with someone else. 
Once the music video was over, you looked over to Jacob who was watching with a serious expression. Slightly out of breath, you walked over, only for him to take you by the wrist and whisk you away privately.
“Is everything okay?” You frowned.
He shook his head. “No. I’m jealous.”
Your jaw almost dropped open at his words. He was never one to be so straightforward. But then your eyes softened as you cupped his jaw with your hand.
“Don’t be, you know that I love to dance with you the most.”
“Really?” He narrowed his eyes skeptically. “Because we never have before.”
“Then let’s do it now.”
“Aren’t you tired from all that dancing?” His gaze was gentle and kind.
You shook your head with an eager smile, taking his hand in yours and leading him to the middle of the room. Slowly, you began to slow dance with him, swaying and holding him close to his chest. 
“Oh,” He breathed out, a smile growing on his lips. “We should do this more often.”
You smiled, resting your cheek against his chest. “I think so too.”
It was silent for a moment, just the two of you stepping side to side, embracing each other’s warmth.
“I love you,” Jacob whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. 
You grinned, leaning up to instead kiss his lips. “I love you too.”
younghoon
“Ouch,” Younghoon muttered, massaging the spot on his chest where you had just run into.
You frowned. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to bump into you.” You cupped his cheeks, pressing small kisses all over. He was about to lean in to press his lips to yours until you heard a familiar cackle from down the hallway.
Panicking, you looked up at your boyfriend. “I have to go. Changmin’s going to get me.” And before he could even utter a response, you were already running to hide in another room. It was a simple game of chase between friends. Neither of you knew who even started it.
Younghoon watched silently as you laughed dearly when Changmin had found you. His heart warmed at the sight of your beautiful smile but, there was a frown on his lips when he saw how it was his own friend who made you giggle. With a sigh, he walked away, devising a quick plan in his head.
Breathing heavily, you burst into an empty room, trying to find a place to hide. Just as you walked past the walk-in closet, you felt a gentle, familiar hand grab onto your wrist and pull you in. With a yelp, you found yourself pressed up right against to Younghoon’s chest.
Before you could even ask him what was wrong, his hand was on your waist as he brought you into a soft kiss, tilting his head lightly. You were confused, but you easily melted into the kiss with a small smile.
“Younghoon…” You whispered, pulling away with a shy expression.
He lifted an eyebrow with an adorable frown, his hair slightly messy. “You’re having fun, aren’t you?”
You noticed that his voice was laced with obvious sarcasm and so you stared at him in utter disbelief. And then you broke out into fond laughter.
“Are you jealous?” You questioned, letting your hand trail down to his.
His frown only deepened, making you grin more. “...yes.”
“You’re so cute.” You smiled. “You know that you’re the only one for me, right?” He nodded silently and so you pressed your lips to his again. He let out a satisfied hum as he leaned in even deeper.
Stumbling out of the closet, red-cheeked and out of breath, the two of you looked up, only to see Changmin standing outside. He grimaced.
“Ew, oh my god,” He groaned before sticking his tongue out. “I won by the way. Since you got distracted.”
hyunjae
“Can you turn on the speaker?” Hyunjae appeared behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist to pull you into a tight back hug. “We have to practice.”
You eyed him with faux annoyance. “If you would let me go, I will.”
He smiled cheekily, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek. “In a minute.”
Sticking your tongue out, you wriggled out of his hold and approached the speaker, only to find it in the worst spot possible. Reaching in the weirdest angles, you couldn’t quite get the button. Immediately, Hyunjae, who always had his eyes on you, noticed.
“I can do it–” He called out.
“Here you go.” Sangyeon suddenly appeared beside you, getting the switch with ease. Smiling up at him, you thanked him.
“Such a gentleman,” You joked.
He rolled his eyes, walking away. “That’s my nature,” He remarked.
You laughed and walked back over to Hyunjae, only to find him looking at you with those puppy eyes. His lips were also pulled into a small frown.
“Hyunjae?”
He stayed silent, turning away grumpily. With a sigh, you took his hand and pulled him out of the practice room and into a separate room made for singing. 
“What’s wrong?” Your eyes softened.
“I don’t know,” He grumbled, his voice uncharacteristically quiet. “Why don’t you ask Sangyeon?”
That was when it suddenly hit you, your lips parting in surprise. Biting back a fond smile, you stepped forward and hugged him. He only sulkily looked down at you and refused to return it.
“You're… jealous?” You grinned. Immediately, he was blushing with a huff of breath. He tried to avoid your eyes but you only persisted, following his gaze. Finally, with a small squirm, he nodded.
You laughed as you leaned in to hide your face in his chest.
“Then can you maybe help me with something?”
Pulling away, he looked at you with excitement as if to tell you that he would do anything for you. Which he certainly would.
“What is it?”
You hummed with a mischievous smile. “My lips are feeling a bit unoccupied.”
He chuckled with a small smirk. “Gladly. Of course I’ll help you with that.” He pressed a kiss to your lips, holding you tightly by the waist. By the time he was done, your lips felt sore. He only smiled proudly at his effect.
“Would Sangyeon be able to do that for you?”
“No," You mumbled, your cheeks flushing.
“The only correct answer,” He teased before kissing you again.
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sungbeam · 2 years ago
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𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐔𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐘 : a series!
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[7 OF 11 NOW CUFFED!] ; it's cuffing season! — and the boyz are in for quite the adventure as they learn to juggle school, work, friends, and love.
starring: the boyz, f!reader
genre: college au, fluff, humor, comfort, assorted pairings
word count: 216k/?? // at least 20k+ words per part
**note: the main plotline (the 4 szns) can be read completely as stand-alones. all other spin-offs can also technically be read as stand-alones, but some might require context from the main plotline. (all prev yns will appear as __!yn)
+ ADD THIS TO YOUR LIST (taglist form: open)
a/n: i'm very excited for this series tbh and i really hope i retain the strength to finish it 🤧 a great way to help me out tho is to blow this post up by reblogging, esp since tumblr gatekeeps the actual fics when they're published :')
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SEASON ONE: PARTY PEOPLE — jacob b.
yours and jacob's mutual friend kevin is convinced that you're meant to be, even if he only just met you. (trailer, 34k)
SEASON TWO: FLIGHT RISK — eric s.
you and eric met on an airplane, and that's where you thought it would end, but clearly the universe has a different plan in mind. (trailer, 30k)
SEASON THREE: OFF THE RECORD — j. changmin (parts 𝐈, 𝐈𝐈)
everyone thinks changmin is cute and harmless, but you know that's not who he really is. (trailer, 36k)
SEASON FOUR: AIN'T NO ROMEO — l. hyunjae
your best friend hyunjae ain't no romeo, but you're still in love... so let's hope he doesn't find out you wrote a whole play about him! (trailer, 30k)
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— spin-offs & side adventures.
RHAPSODY ANONYMOUS — k. sunwoo
you never thought your humble, little podcast would ever touch somebody's soul like it did one kim sunwoo's. (trailer, 28k)
RESCUE PROTOCOL — kevin m.
another summer break, another annual trip to the lake! except, it seems like when you and kev get there, you'll have to make some tweaks to the original rescue protocol. (trailer, 29k)
AT YOUR CONVENIENCE — k. younghoon
neither you nor younghoon were party people, but you did find love in the convenience store down the block. (trailer, 29k)
HOT COMMODITY — j. haknyeon
no matter how many times he's been to this restaurant, haknyeon swears he's not just here for the cute waitress. (trailer, __)
PINKY SWEAR — c. chanhee
you and chanhee are far from the years of pinky swears, but here you are, still lacing fingers after all this time. (trailer, __)
THE REVEAL — l. sangyeon
does sangyeon really have a secret girlfriend? well... let's find out. (trailer, __)
CLASS(Y) ACTION — l. juyeon
nothing is more cutthroat than the legal sphere, and sometimes we have to find allies in the strangest places—even if he spills coffee on you. (trailer, __)
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EXTRA/"DELETED" SCENES
section under construction.
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EXTRA, EXTRA CONTENT
— QUIZZES!
lmk what u got for a free smooch and a cookie 🤸‍♀️🥰
which love in unity boy will you be cuffing this year? (uquiz)
which love in unity boy will you be cuffing this school year? (**NEW & IMPROVED VER)
love in unity trivia !! for the main plot only (uquiz)
— ALT. READING ORDERS
if u want to read this series in timeline order, this is how it should be done: jacob/younghoon, eric/haknyeon, changmin/sunwoo, hyunjae/chanhee, sangyeon, kevin, juyeon
if u wanna read sungbeam's favorites (no particular order): at your convenience, ain't no romeo, (more to be decided!)
— SERIES TAGS: general series. any wip can be searched via "wip: _____" (usually just the initials, except for party people); or "the (member) fic™"
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