#the horrors and the delights

[roboticchibitan]

Today's delight is that I took an evening walk! It is 34°f/1°c outside and the sun is going down but tonight is a full moon so I got to see the moon and it was big and yellow. Very fitting for an October full moon.

[mag200]

posting hole, or whatever. pictures i took at the park.

[roboticchibitan]

Today's delight is that I got a call that my yarn store pickup order was ready this morning and I just! Walked to the bus stop! Got on the bus! Rode it around town! By myself! Got my yarn! And rode back!

When I moved to this city five (almost six now) years ago, I had agoraphobia and absolutely HATED leaving my house alone. And when I did I was at Maximum Stress the entire time. I refused to ride the bus alone after dark despite there being a bus stop one well lit block away from my front door. I hated going places alone.

As my agoraphobia got better, my physical health deteriorated. My chronic pain got steadily worse and when I got covid in 2020 I never recovered, developing a new life threatening autoimmune disorder as well as long covid. I got to a point that I could no longer ride the bus even if I wanted to because my neighborhood is not wheelchair accessible and I was using a wheelchair most of the time when I left my house.

But with some medication and lifestyle changes, I'm suddenly in so much less pain than I was. I'm able to walk to and from and between bus stops (most days). Coupled with the fact that I'm no longer constantly anxious and agoraphobic, and I am feeling the most intense sense of freedom for the first time on years. This is my delight.

Every time I ride the bus somewhere by myself, I'm delighted. I get giddy reloading money onto my bus fare card. I'm constantly looking to see if new places are accessible by bus. And sometimes they aren't (boo!) But a lot of the time, they are and I can plan my trips accordingly. I am experiencing independence for the first time since I stopped driving due to psychosis at 19. I'm living my best life.

Now we need high speed railways in this country and I shall truly be free!

[roboticchibitan]

The Horrors are a lil Too Real today so tell me about your Delights. Doesn't have to be from today. Can just be things that make you happy in general. I'll go first:

Today I got excited when I loaded money onto my bus fare card because I now have a level of independence I haven't had in years thanks to my improved health and public transportation. Also my gf's Yule gift is coming along very nicely and I'm quite pleased with how it's turning out!

[roboticchibitan]

I woke up at 5 am from a stress dream and couldn't go back to sleep because of The Horrors but I also had a Delight today which was that on my walks to/from bus stops when I went to the Tibetan Buddhist temple this morning I stomped on SO many excellent crunchy leaves and each one was so satisfying. Dozens of Delights! Just laying on the ground! For free!

We all have to live with The Horrors but there's also The Delights so tell me your Delight from last week!

[roboticchibitan]

Getting through the horrors one delight at a time.