#the trampoline belongs to semi- believe it or not

[crnl-chicken-tots]

Welcome to my "late night thoughts that I fixate on for a month before doing something about" ideas.

Look at the boys- silly, aren't they?

[autistic-arcana]

Every Twenty One Pilots Song

I saw someone do this and thought it would be a good way to procrastinate everything I need to get done.  So here are my favorite lyrics to every tøp song and a some of NPI.

"Let the water wash away 
Everything that you've become On your knees, today is gone
 And tomorrow's sure to come" - Blasphemy

"Depression and drowning singing now the full parts 
Of lightning reveals where the ocean stops and the sky starts I’ve been told by the sky that the ocean I shall win
 But it’s hard for me to see where ocean stops, and where sky begins A random strike of light reminds me of what is true But right now the ocean is blacker than black, the sky is too" - Drown

"And my own two hands 
Will start bleeding again And floor will turn to 
To a hole in the ground" - Hole In The Ground

"It's as good as I can be 
This is all that I can be" - Save

"And somebody told me they saw you cry and break down
 Do you know how hard that is to get around and think about? 
It's not like you to let emotions get the best of things Especially when everything is hanging in the air we breathe" - Taken By Sleep

"I can't live this way 
Just to write a song to play
Just to stay alive
 Just enough to breathe away 
Another day, another face 
And I will lose another race Save me now 'Cause tomorrow's gone just like yesterday" - Just Like Yesterday

"The point in life must be 
Pretty dark and hopeless
 Terrifying And if you’re asking me when that is It must be tonight" - Tonight

"I would laugh away the pain 
Did you know I'd run all day 
Just to maybe hear you say 
That you are falling too" - Falling Too

"Reign down and destroy me" - Implicit Demand For Proof

"I'm dying and I'm trying But believe me, I'm fine, but I'm lying 
I'm so very far from fine And I, I can feel the pull begin
I feel my conscience wearing thin
 And my skin, it will start 
To break up and fall apart" - Fall Away

"A moth ate through
Your favorite shirt" - The Pantaloon

"End of my ways as a walking denial My trial was filed as a "crazy, suicidal head case"" - Addict With A Pen

"You say that you're fine, but you have lost your sway and glow" - Friend, Please

"I realize that this line is dead So I'll follow you instead" - March To The Sea

"We all need you now" - Johnny Boy

"Your twisted thoughts are like snow on the rooftops Please, take my hand, we're in foreign land" - Oh Ms. Believer

"So I'll write my fears" - Air Catcher

"And he pretends he's okay, but you should see, oh
 Him in bed late at night, he's petrified...He thinks that faith might be dead 
Nothing kills a man faster than his own head" - Trapdoor

"I began to understand why God died" - A Car, A Torch, A Death

"Don't be afraid 
We're going home" - Taxi Cab

"Look in the mirror and ask your soul if you're alright Put on the glitter that your soul hides behind You're in my mind" - Before You Start Your Day

"We find our worth in giving birth, and stuff We're lining our homes against winding roads
 And we think the going is tough We pick songs to sing, remind us of things that nobody cares about And honestly, we're probably more suicidal than ever now"

"So bold and fearless in the risks we'd take, laugh in the face
 Of gravity as its laws we'd break 
On trampolines so high we reach for the sky But I do not look up anymore and I don't know why" - Slowtown

"My brain has given up, white flags are hoisted 
I took some food for thought, it might be poisoned" - Forest

"We all know somebody who knows somebody who's doing great
 I know some people who know people who are flying straight But I'll kindly enter in to rooms of depression
 While ceiling fans and idle hands will take my life again" - Glowing Eyes

"Are you searching for purpose? Then write something, yeah it might be worthless
 Then paint something, and it might be wordless 
Pointless curses, nonsense verses
 You'll see purpose start to surface" - Kitchen Sink

"I'm caught under water and I'm falling farther My heart's getting harder, I'm calling my father 
Am I screaming to an empty sky?" - Anathema

"The only difference between life and dying 
Is one is trying, that's all we're called to do
 So try to love Me and I'll try to save you" - Lovely

"We're all diseased" - Ruby

"I'm lying cause I say I am fine" - Be Concerned

"Introspection is the name of this session 
Spread this infection, reflect it on the next one" - Clear

"A mask that portrays that we don't need grace" - Ode to Sleep

"Fight it, take the pain, ignite it, tie a noose around your mind 
Loose enough to breath fine and tie it to a tree tell it, "You belong to me, this ain't a noose 
This is a leash and I have news for you You must obey me!"" - Holding On To You

"I did not know it was such a violent island 
Full of tidal waves, suicidal crazed lions 
They're trying to eat me, blood running down their chin And I know that I can fight, or I can let the lion win I begin to assemble what weapons I can find
 'Cause sometimes to stay alive you gotta kill your mind" - Migraine

"And since we know that dreams are dead 
And life turns plans up on their head I will plan to be a bum
 So I just might become someone" - House of Gold

"I'm forced to deal with what I feel
 There is no distraction to mask what is real
 I could pull the steering wheel" - Car Radio

"Night falls, with gravity The earth turns, from sanity Taking my only friend I know
 He leaves a lot, his name is Hope" - Semi-Automatic

"We're broken people" - Screen

"You'll have to watch me struggle
 From several rooms away But tonight I'll need you to stay" - The Run and Go

"What kids are doing
 They're killing themselves They feel they have no control of their prisoner cell
 And if you're one of them then you're one of me 
And you would do almost anything just to feel free... Our brains are sick but that's okay" - Fake You Our

"Together, let's breathe
 Together, to the beat" - Guns For Hands

"I can feel your breath
 I can feel my death" - Trees

"Stay alive, stay alive for me" - Truce

"This is not rap, this is not hip-hop
 Just another attempt to make the voices stop" - Heavydirtysoul

"Out of student loans and tree house homes, we all would take the latter" - Stressed Out

"Yeah I think about the end just way too much
 But it's fun to fantasize On my enemies I wouldn't wish who I was
 But it's fun to fantasize" - Ride

"Yo, you, bulletproof in black like a funeral The world around us is burning but we're so cold" - Fairly Local

"Sometimes you gotta bleed to know 
That you’re alive and have a soul" - Tear In My Heart

"But I know a thing or two about pain and darkness If it wasn’t for this music I don’t know how I would have fought this" - Lane Boy

"I'm thinking
 'Wow, I probably should've stayed inside my house.'" - The Judge

"I'm not sure if I can see this ever stopping
 Shaking hands with the dark parts of my thoughts" - Doubt

"It's deciding where to die and deciding where to fight" - Polarize

"I used to say I wanna die before I'm old
 But because of you I might think twice" - We Don't Believe What's On TV

"These lyrics aren't for everyone 
Only few understand" - Message Man

"Put away, put away
 All the gods your father served today 
Put away, put away
Your traditions, believe me when I say" - Hometown

"I don't know why
 I just feel I'm better off staying in the same room I was born in" - Not Today

"Don’t let me be gone" - Goner

"I crumble underneath the weight 
Pressures of a new place roll my way" - Jumpsuit

"You can learn to levitate with just a little help" - Levitate

"There's no above, or under, or around it
 For "above" is blind belief and "under" is sword to sleeve 
And "around" is scientific miracle" - Morph

"If you find yourself in a lion's den 
I'll jump right in and pull my pin" - My Blood

"I despise you sometimes, I love to hate the fight" - Chlorine

"I never look for conflict for the thrill" - Smithereens

"Promise me this
If I lose to myself 
You won't mourn a day
 And you'll move onto someone else" - Neon Gravestones

"And you know you're a terrible sight
 But you'll be just fine" - The Hype

"Save your razorblades now, not yet" - Nico And The Niners

"I don't mind at all, lean on my pride 
Lean on my pride, I'm a lion" - Cut My Lip

"I created this world to feel some control
 Destroy it if I want So I sing Sahlo Folina" - Bandito

"I can feel pressure start to possess my mind" - Pet Cheetah

"Then the day that it happened, I recorded this last bit 
I look forward to having a lunch with you again" - Legend

"In time, I will leave the city 
For now, I will stay alive...In Trench I'm not alone" - Leave the City

[notallballs]

Haikyuu!! Summer Reads

I love reading stories about summer, and some of my all-time favourite haikyuu!! fics are brilliant summer stories, packed full of whirlwind romance, heat, and heartbreak as the season ends. Some of these I know you’ll have read before, but give the others a shot, because they’re all magical in their own way :3

//

This got long so I’ll stash it under a cut, but please do share these wonderful fics around! :3

HOLIDAY READS: long fics to get your teeth into this summer

the unbreakable fear of losing - Kagesuga, M, 21369

“Kageyama will be with Sugawara.”Tobio’s eyes flit back towards the soft, welcoming smile that hasn’t dimmed once since they got off the bus, and his stomach flutters despite it roiling otherwise in anxious nerves. Sugawara seems nice and quiet, which are two qualities Tobio values in people he’s forced to spend time with Tobio volunteers as a Junior counselor at a summer camp with Sugawara as his mentor.

this is one of the first hq fics I read and remains one of my favourite fics of all time. it perfectly captures the fleeting sense of summer and teenage years coming to a close. everyone is wonderfully written, and the prose is magical. even if you’re not usually a kagesuga shipper, i really recommend giving this one a go. 

//

The Stars in Summer by @ellessey-writes​ - Daisuga, E, 34609

The summer before his senior year of high school, Suga is grounded, stuck in a small town he doesn’t know, with no friends, no plans for the break, and no end in sight. Then, as luck would have it, he meets Daichi.

Suddenly, it’s a big town, and an even bigger world, with the open sky up above—and someone for Suga to reach out and touch it with, before the long train ride back home.

another story that perfectly captures the brief, transitory feeling of summer, and summer crushes. this story has the most wonderful mix of long, hot, lazy days, and the desperation of time quickly running out where it seemed like it was going to last forever. beautifully written, and achingly romantic.

//

Azumane Asahi’s Big Gay Romance - Asanoya, T, 13646

The air-con gets cranky, Asahi gets a job, and Nishinoya gets his man.

When Noya comes out to the team, the air conditioning system in the gym makes one long impassioned wail at the top of its lungs and then proceeds to break down. Honestly, Asahi doesn’t know which he’s more distracted by: the fact that Noya just cheerfully confessed he likes to make out with guys behind the school bleachers, or the high-pitched death knells of their murdered air-con.

one of the first hq fics i read, and still one of the best. this has the upbeat, irreverent feel of the show mixed with a slice of life shojo. it’s ridiculous, adorable, and all the characters are utterly charming.

//

This Insignificant Pride and Prejudice by @poulerslashes and @mysecretfanmoments - Ushioi, T, 33655

Oikawa Tooru graduated high school with the burning desire to succeed in his college career. He'd hoped that might include taking down his arch-nemesis along the way, but when he finds that his college team hosts an offensively familiar face, he can't help but think that the universe might be conspiring against him. After all, what could be worse than playing on the same team as Ushijima?

it might already be obvious how much i love this story, considering that i wrote a sequel to it, but honestly. if you’re not sold on this ship yet then this is a fic that will get you there, and you’ll fall in love with ushijima just as surely as elizabeth fell in love with darcy. it’s fun and wonderfully thought out, with a rich supporting cast and spot on characterisation.

//

Sun Above Your Shoulders - Kagehina, T, 26444

Hinata and Kageyama go to different high schools and meet again in Okinawa for the first time since middle school.

"Toss for me!"

The boy is grinning, already leading the way onto the court, walking backwards. Unthinkingly, Kageyama starts to follow him, then stops, annoyed at himself.

"I don't even know your name," he says.

"Hinata Shouyou." Hinata steps to the right side of the net and waits.

this is so, so charming. hinata and kageyama are both beautifully written and this story perfectly encapsulates the feeling of long summer breaks and brief summer flings. it’s so exciting to see this first meeting between them in a different setting, in different circumstances, yet how quickly they click because volleyball. 

//

Under the Radar by @lilienpasse - Asanoya, E, 214188

Two weeks after Asahi rejoins the team, Noya finds himself starting to slip during practice. Missed receives, floor burns, the whole nine yards. But when Tanaka points out the possible cause, Noya's hard-pressed to believe him. There's no way someone as dopey yet implausibly-competent as Asahi could be the cause of all his distress. After all, Noya doesn't worry about much beyond the court, and he certainly doesn't hold grudges. Right? (Semi-AU) 

i wouldn’t normally put a wip on a rec list like this, but if you’ve exhausted all your other summer reading, this is hands down one of my favourite fics ever, and it’s got this deep ache of wonderful summer feelings all the way through it. the characters are so genuine and relatable, and there’s so much wonderful worldbuilding. a lot of thought and love has gone into this (and you have my solemn promise the author is still working on it! ;3)

 //

QUICKIES: something to occupy a lunch break or a bus ride, or curl up in bed with

Best Friends by @mysecretfanmoments​ - Kuroken, E, 6307

Every evening they walk home together, Kuro smelling of salt and suntan lotion, Kenma’s hands sore from scooping ice cream all day, and it feels nice. Peaceful.

He’s glad Kuro came, after all.

((During the two weeks he spends manning his uncle's ice cream booth on the coast, Kenma decides that maybe he likes his best friend back, after all))

this story is all about that heat i mentioned, but it’s so much more than just a pwp. the writing is poetry, and every line is fraught with warmth and emotion, you can feel the urgency rolling off the screen.

//

the yeah yeah yeah song by @keptein - Bokuroo, T, 4681

And the light from the stage catches in the guy’s hair, so blond it shines white like a beacon, like one of the stars overhead. Tetsurou leans over and yells in his ear, hand on one solid shoulder, “Cool hair!”

 “You too!” the guy yells back, “I dig the sex hair look!”

i think this might be the fic that made me fall in love with this ship. it perfectly captures the feeling of summer festivals, the warm sense of belonging, of being out in the heat enjoying something together. it’s wonderfully laid back, and bokuto and kuroo are both so young and vivid, it’s addictive.

//

and it may be foolish to fall as i do - Bokuroo, E, 5604

There's a trampoline in the middle of the courtyard across from Kuroo's first class.

another story that just gorgeously captures this ship, and the feeling of being young and a bit reckless, not to mention the painfully relatable feeling of falling for a total stranger. 

//

A Productive Summer Break - Ushioi, M, 9079

Ushijima and Oikawa try to improve their teamwork over summer break.

this story is just boiling over with barely repressed tension. it was such a captivating read, and had a fantastic mix of romance and pragmatism that made it really enjoyable.

//

Lifeguard Dude by @zanimez​ - Kurodai, E, 6945

It's spring break.

Everything is going great, until Daichi looks up and sees the hottest lifeguard he's ever seen in his life.

this is one of the fics that really sold me on this ship, it’s funny and sexy and all the supporting characters are brilliant