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brokenin21stcentury · 5 years

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THE MOMENT I REALIZED

I AM EMPTY. MY FEELINGS VANISHED FROM MY BODY. THERE’S NOTHING LEFT OF ME.

I WANT TO FEEL BUT I DONT. I LISTEN BUT I DONT HEAR. I AM TRYING TO UNDERSTAND BUT I DONT UNDERSTAND.

I WANT TO SCREAM BUT I DONT HAVE THE VOICE. I WANT TO CRY, BUT I CAN’T AS THERES NOTHING THAT WOULD CAUSE THEM TO DROP BY DROP DOWN MY FACE. I KNOW I WAS HURT BUT I WAS HURT SO MANY TIMES THAT I AM EMPTY NOW. THERE SHOULD BE PAIN BUT THERE ISNT. THERE SHOULD BE HATE BUT THERES IS NO HATE IN ME. HAPPINESS, THAT ALSO LEFT ME LAST NIGHT.

I AM SIMPLE BOY IN MY TWENTIES BUT NOW I FEEL MY LIFE HAS BEEN TAKEN AWAY, NOT ONLY BECAUSE OF MY FIRST HEARTBREAK BUT BECAUSE OF EVERY FUCKING HURTFUL HATEFUL THING I HAVE HEARD BEEING THROWN AT MY FACE. DISRESPECT COMES MY WAY EVERYDAY. MAYBE. JUST MAYBE. IS THAT ME, IS THAT MY FAULT, DID I CAUSED THIS ?

•HEARTBREAK•

SOMETIME AGO I FELT MY HEART IS STONE COLD AND DEAD. IT JUST PUMPS MY BLOOD AND THAT’S IT. I WAS TEACHING MYSELF TO LOVE, AND CREATE SOMETHING FAKE. AS YEARS OVER THE YEARS PEOPLE DID SOME CRAZY THINGS AND I FELT LONE AND DOWN. BUT I DID MY BEST.

ONE DAY I JUST DECIDED TO SEE WHERE COULD A PRETTY FACE PUT ME. MAYBE WILL TELL ME THAT I AM NOTHING AND JUST MY LOOKS DOESNT FIT THE NEEDS. i was wrong.

BOY WHO THOUGHT HIM SELF TO BE SOMEONE AND NEVER LISTEN TO ANYONE. AS TILL NOW PEOPLE ONLY HURT ME.

I FEEL IN LOVE THE MOMENT I SAW HIM WALKING MY WAY. I FEEL IN LOVE WHEN HE STARTED TO SPEAK. I FEEL IN LOVE WHEN YOU SMILED. *inhale and exhale* HIS SMILE WAS JUST SOMETHING, IT HIT ME AS A ELECTRICITY AND TEARED DOWN THE STONE COLD WALL AROUND MY HEART. I FEEL IN LOVE WITH HIM WHEN HE WAS SPEAKING. I LOVED MYSELF WHEN I WAS AROUND HIM. I WAS LISTENING AND I UNDERSTOOD, THERE WAS HAPPINESS AND PASSION. THAT’S WHY THAT DAY I FEEL IN LOVE WITH HIM BECAUSE I LOVED MYSELF. WHO WOULD KNEW THAT JUST ONE PERSON WOULD COME AND HEAT ME UP AND BUILD ME UP.

AS YOU SEE, THE STORY IS ABOUT CAUSING MY BREATH STOPPING, STOPPING MY BODY. NOT EVEN CREATING THE STONE AROUND MY HEART BECAUSE SIMPLY I DONT BELIEVE THERES SOMETHING EVEN IN ME ANYMORE.

WE SPENT TIME, TALKED AND DID THINGS. HE STAYED AT MY PLACE. HE WAS NEXT TO ME. AND PUT HIS HEAD ON MY CHEST. AND MY HEART TURNED INTO A FIRE. BEAUTIFUL, WARM FIRE. AND EVERY OTHER THING I KNEW ABOUT LOVE WAS NOT EVEN CLOSE WHAT I FELT. NOW I KNOW HOW THE HEAVEN FEELS LIKE. I WAS DEAD AND YOU WOKE ME UP. YOU GOT UP. GAVE THE LAST KISS AND WALKED OUT. I WAS THE HAPPIEST PERSON ALIVE. I DIDNT NEED ANYTHING. I WAS JUST ME. BUT THEN IT ALSO CAUSED PAIN.

MAKES SENES, EVERYTHING IS IN BALANCE. I FELT PAIN BECAUSE YOU LEFT, I FELT PAIN BEACUSE YOURE NOT HEAR. I FELT PAIN BECAUSE I WANTED YOU HERE. I FELT LOVE BECAUSE I WOKE UP NEXT TO YOU, AT THE SAME FEELING PAIN, BECAUSE WHY I AM THE LUCKIEST TO HAVE YOU.

- I WAS WRITE. why did i have you?

THE ANSWER IS SIMPLE. I NEVER HAD YOU. YOU WANTED TO EXPLORE. JUST WITH THE WRONG PERSON. YOU SIMPLY SAID - IT WAS A MISTAKE. I NEVER SHOULD HAVE STARTED THIS. YOU ARE SWEET AND LOVING BUT I HAVENT GOT OVER SOMEONE.

IT KILLED ME. YOU KILLED ME WITH YOUR MISTAKE. AND AT THE BEGINNING I SAID THE ONLY THING PEOPLE HAVE DONE IN MY LIFE IS CAUSED PAIN. AND YOU WERENT ANY BETTER. YOU MADE ME ALIVE. WILD AND FREE. I WAS MILION TIMES BETTER THEN I WAS THAT PERSON WHEN I WAS 12 YEARS OLD WHEN MANY PEOPLE DESTROYED ME IN PIECES.

I FINALLY THOUGHT ITS MY TIME, SOMETHING GOOD FINALLY. IT WAS ME WHO REBORN WITH MORE IN ME THEN EVEN. BUT YOU ONLY NEEDED TO TELL ME I WAS A MISTAKE TO KILL ME. ONLY THIS TIME THE FALL WAS MUCH HIGHER, THE PAIN, MUCH GREATER AND EVERYTHING ELSE WAS WAY MORE PAINFUL THEN WHEN I WAS 12 YEARS OLD.

*RECOVERY*

MANY THINGS HAPPENED, YOU MADE ME TO NOTICE THAT YOURE STILL HERE. AROUND ME. TO MAKE SURE I AM NOT GETTING UP FROM A PLACE YOU KILLED ME.

HAVING THE BEST PEOPLE AROUND ME AND TREATING MYSELF GOOD AND DOING THINGS THAT I LOVE. WITH A TIME I BUILT MYSELF AS A DECENT HUMAN. NOT HAPPY. NOT SAD. NOT MAD. JUST SIMPLE BREATHING CREATURE. I WAS BREATHING AGAIN. ALIVE, MAYBE NOT REALLY. I WAS BETTER ANYWAYS.

*REALIZED PT. 1*

YOU MAYBE CAME MY WAY TO SHOW ME WHAT I CAN BE. AND FUCK ME UP AT THE SAME TIME. BECAUSE THINGS WERE CHANGING. THEY WERE CHANGING BECAUSE I WAS A PERSON WITH NO SOUL. I WAS JUST GOING THROUGH LIFE AS IT NEVER REALLY MATTERED. SO IT HAD TO SHOW ME. THAT I CAN LIVE, BE IN LOVE AND BE SEXY. AT THE SAME TIME. FEELINGS ARE JUST A GAME AND PEOPLE ARE STILL JUST TO HURT YOU.

*FEELINGS*

SOMETIME AGO I HAD MY FIRST REAL CRUSH ON A BOY. I MEAN, EXISTING PERSON IN FRONT OF ME. NOT SOMEWHERE VIRTUALLY. WE MET ONCE, IT WAS BEAUTIFUL BUT COMPLICATED. AS HE WAS NOT LIVING CLOSE. JUST HUNDREDS OF KILOMETERS AWAY. SO IT WAS SOMETHING BUT STILL IT WAS SO SHORT AND THE TIME WAS STOLEN TO ACTUALLY MAKE THIS WORK.

TAKING YOU BACK TO NOW.

THIS FIRST CRUSH AGAIN IS BACK FOR COUPLE OF DAYS. I MEET HIM AND AT THE END OF THE EVENING I KISSED YOU. AND AWKWARD MOMENT TURNED INTO BEAUTIFUL PASSIONATE NIGHT FOR JUST COUPLE OF SECONDS. BUT HIS LIPS TASTED AMAZING.

NEXT DAY I GAVE ROOM FOR YOU TO DO SOMETHING AND YOU DIDNT DO ANYTHING. AND THE NIGHT WAS OVER.

TWO DAYS LATER MY FRIEND HAD THE LAST GOOD BY PARTY AS SHES LEAVING. WE BROUGHT THE PARTY TO HOME AND PARTIED THERE.

TILL YOU SAID YOURE IN TOWN. AND WE MIGHT MEET. TOOK ME COUPLE OF MINUTES TO GET READY, AND MY BESTFRIEND AND OTHER FRIEND WAS ON THE HUNT FOR YOU.

I MET YOU. YOU WERE COLD. I WAS CONFUSED. THEN RUMOR WAS, THAT YOURE GONE. BUT MOMENT LATER YOU WERE THERE. NEXT TABLE. NOT GIVING ANY ATTENTION. ALTHOUGH MY FRIENDS HELPED ME TO GET IT. THEY SAID YOU WERE LOOKING AT ME HOW I DANCE. YOU JOINED OUR TABLE WITH YOUR FRIEND. BUT DIDNT SAY ANYTHING.

THEN MOMENT LATER WE ALL ARE LEAVING FOR ANOTHER PLACE. WE TAKE A CAB AND WE ARE TWO MANY. GIRLS TAKE THE CAB I CALLED AND YOURE LEFT WITH ME.

WHILE WAITING. YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU COULDNT NOT LOOK. YOU LIKED THE WAY I DANCED. AND ACTUALLY YOURE HAPPY THAT ITS JUST YOU AND ME HERE BECAUSE YOU GET TIME WITH ME.

AT THE BAR WE ARE FINALLY GOING TO ORDER DRINKS. YOU AND YOURE FRIEND ARE IN FRONT OF ME. YOURE TOUCHING MY LEG AND I RESPOND. YOURE GIVING ME SIGNALS. I LIKE IT. BY THE TABLE YOU IGNORED ME.

EVENING IS GOING SUPER NOT WELL. AND I AM ALMOST SOBER. I TOOK SHOTS. WE GO OUT TO SMOKE. WE GO BACK FOR THE TOILET.

*Toilet*

THERES TWO DOORS IN THE TOILET. ONE IS TAKEN. I GO FIRST. HEARD YOUR KNOCKS. I GO OUT AND LET YOU GO IN. FUCK, I AM AN IDIO. I DIDNT PULL YOU IN.

YOU CAME OUT. AND ANOTHER PERSON CAME IN. HE IS WASHING HANDS. AND YOURE WAITING TO DO THE SAME. YOURE WASHING YOUR HANDS. ITS JUST YOU AND ME. YOU GIVE ME A LOOK THROUGH THE MIRROR. THAT AGAIN TURN ME ON AND I FELT SOMETHING GOOD. THE NEXT MOMENT. OUR LIPS MEET. I AM AGAINST THE WALL. KISSING. AND ENJOYING. FIREWORKS IN ME. FEELING GOOD. TILL I GOT SCARED IF SOMEONE COMES IN. AND I STOPED. BUT I WAS A FOOL NOT TO GO BACK AND CONTINUE.

THAT WAS IT THAT NIGHT. I FELT AMAZING BUT I WAS MISSING MORE.

NEXT DAY I ACTUALLY COULDNT DRIVE BUT I DROVE YOU HOME. HOLDED YOUR HAND ALL THE WAY. HOPED MAYBE WILL CONTINUE WHAT WE STARTED LAST NIGHT. BUT NO, NOTHING HAPPENED. IT WAS ONLY YESTERDAY.

*SAME EVENING*

I AM HOME WITH MY PARENTS. I THINK ITS ENOUGH. BUT TO SAY FAST. THEY TOLD ME THAT I AM HORRIBLE. SHITTY SON, AND I FELT HOW MAD AND UNHAPPY THEY ARE WITH ME. I SAW HATE. AND DIDNT KNOW ABOUT WHAT WAS THAT. AND SOMETIMES ALL YOU NEED IS ACCEPTANCE FROM YOUR PARENTS. FOR YOUR PARENTS TO SAY - YOURE DOING GREAT SON. KEEP UP. NEVER HEARD THAT. AND THE QUESTION IN MY HEAD IS - WHAT DID I DO SO WRONG? DO THEY LOVE ME?

MOMENT I REALIZED ...

I AM EMPTY. ALL THESE PEOPLE JUST TOOK ALL THERE WAS LEFT IN ME. AND WE ARE BACK AT THE STARTING POINT. THATS HOW ACTUALLY I FEEL. PEOPLE SHIT ON ME. AND I AM UNHAPPY. BUT AT THE SAME TIME - HOW DO I KNOW? I AM REALLY EMPTY.

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thegirlwhohateschange · 5 years

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Checked an Item Off the List

Remember almost 5 months ago when I said I made a list of things that I wanted to accomplish this year? I just checked what I was pretty sure would be the most difficult, virtually impossible to accomplish item off the list. I had sex.

To many of you (if anyone ever even reads this), this might seem like a questionable accomplishment. "Who cares? Everyone has sex," you might say. Well, I don't. Or rather, I hadn't until today. I am 34 years old, and before today I had only kissed 4 people. Nothing more than that.

Why did I hold on to my stupid ass virginity for nearly 3 and a half decades? Why did I not hop into bed with the first guy who winked at me? I pretty much did. Well, sort of.

A couple of things to know about me. I am obese. I have worked hard to get healthy, but I am now and will forever be big. Again, I know there are a lot of women and men for whom being bigger isn't a problem. I learned at an early age that being fat was the worst possible thing you could be. It's taken me a long time to stop hating my meat suit, even longer to realize that someone else might find it attractive.

Thing 2 - I have been abused. I let someone into my life in a platonic way and they whittled away at my world to make themselves feel better until there was almost nothing left of me. Then this "soul sister" abandoned me; just one day decided to stop picking up the phone. Did I play a part in this circumstance? Absolutley. I depended on her, she was the only person who was there for me, and it drove her crazy when she realized she could never get rid of me. She wore me down into this helpless, meek, opinionless person, and then she didn't like what she made. And I didn't know how to be different. I didn't even know there was anything wrong with ther way I was behaving. I still don't think I've fully recovered from that experience (or the decade I spent taking care of a codependent alcoholic after that), but I took a huge step towards changing that pattern of behavior today.

Thing 3: I have been hopelessly in love with my current housemate for almost 20 years. I met him when I was 14 years old and the first second I saw him I gave my heart away. I have never felt about anyone the way I feel about him (and I have had feelings for other people...I feel attraction, I get horny, I just had no idea what to do about those feelings and imagined that no one could ever feel any sort of attraction to me). It's like the lights dim and a spot shines just on him when he's in the room. I have to physically restrain myself from running when I hear the door to his bedroom open. Don't even get me started on how incredibly talented he is. He's absolutely brilliant, a phenomenal musician and songwriter, a marvelous graphic artists (he'd hate that, he's a DC guy), and an utterly amazing mind that not only keeps up with mine but pushes my boundaries of thought. I want him in every way possible. And after 19 years of loving him I told him how I feel last summer. And he does not feel the same way. The thing is, he's my best friend in addition to being the unrequited love of my life. It took me months to feel even a little bit ok, but I can't blame him. I'm really not for everyone, I know that... I'm hardly for anyone, and I can't blame him for not wanting me. It just... hurt. And it certainly doesn't help that he's still pining over his incredibly gorgeous, impossibly brilliant and talented ex. Anyway.

Thing 4: No one has ever wanted me. I mean no one has ever said the words to "I think your hot, and I would love to hook up with you." Who knew that was all it took?

So I'm working on my weight and my health, I'm in therapy for the abandonment and codependent stuff, and I'm desperately trying to get over my housemate because I'd rather have my best friend back than push the issue and end up with no one. My efforts to get over my housemate include being active on OKC. It's not great, but I'm terrified of people and really bad at understanding the signals they're sending. And a couple of days ago I get this message.

Usually when I get a super direct message the person will follow that first message up with "I'd love to take your virginity" or "are you really still a virgin?" That when I know I've become someone's quest. I'm not a woman to them, I'm barely a person at all. I'm a check mark, a mission, a notch on the bed post. Call me crazy, but I don't find being someone's fetish seductive. This guy didn't do that. So I did something very unlike me and actually opened his message and wrote him back.

He suggested we meet up somewhere public...good sign number 2. He made the plan for what to do, but let me pick the place (gs#3). He was nice and cute and interesting (gs#4). And finally, he made me feel comfortable and wanted... and that sealed the deal. Marijuana may have had an assist in the end.

It was not great, but it wasn't bad either. I was mostly unhelpful because I had no idea what I was doing, but he didn't seem to mind. I didn't tell him I was a virgin, which was pretty shitty of me. He made sure to get consent and made sure I enjoyed myself.

It's weird, I didn't think I would feel different. It's not as though I haven't been getting myself off for years. But I do kind of feel different. I didn't try everything. We didn't spend hours together afterwards (to be perfectly honest, I got kind of overwhelmed and lied to him about needing to go have dinner with my parents to get him to leave...I feel shitty about that too). He made it clear he'd like to hook up again, and I think I might like that.

I sort of didn't think this would every happen. I really thought I was going to die a virgin. Actually, it was one of the reasons I didn't kill myself a few years back when things were really bad; I didn't want to die a virgin. For more than 15 years I could not conceive of anyone wanting me. I actually don't know if I have ever felt like someone was attracted to me. I wonder how much I've missed, living in the world in my head, the world my friend programmed, the world my alcoholic ex-boss reinforced, the world where I was a monster, less than nothing, utterly repulsive. Now there's this guy who not only finds me interesting and attractive enough to talk to me on a dating site, but to actually meet me in person. A guy who wants to touch me, a guy who's dick gets hard being near me, a guy who apologized for coming so quickly because he was so into me (I had plenty of fun and reassured him of that).

Do I magically love my body? No. Did I instantly gain confidence? Maybe a little. Am I over my housemate? Hell no. I don't think I'll ever be over him, but I'm trying to move on. Do I think we'll hook up again? I hope so. I'd like to get better at this... learn what I like, try a few more things, and enjoy myself more. If we don't, we don't, but at least the wait is over.

I texted a friend and told her in the weirdest, most inappropriate, Happy Easter message ever (insert he is risen joke here). She told me it was the best text message she has ever gotten.

I'm not a virgin anymore, just thought you should know.

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apsbicepstraining · 6 years

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5 Actors Who Do The Same WTF Specific Thing In Every Movie

Many actors have a signature form. Tom Cruise loves to pas, Nicolas Cage can never be more than six inches from ardor, and Sylvester Stallone likes to add a brief fart announced to the centre of every word. But those can easily be explained away — by vigour, lunacy, and mouth-full-of-farts, respectively. But no one can explain why the next 5 aces continue using the same bizarrely specific stuffs happen to them in every single movie.

Arnold Schwarzenegger Is Constantly Perturbed About Forgetting His Partner To Leering Shitheads

Arnold Schwarzenegger has returned himself into a glistening cistern of a human, but all those thousands of hours at the gym seem to have obliged him unusually insecure about his house life. In True Lies , he plays a top-secret authority ultra snoop pose as a run-of-the-mill 300 -pound bodybuilding software salesman, but he gets murderously anxious when his ignored partner strives out “adventure” in the form of sleazy employed vehicle salesman Bill Paxton.

20 th Century Fox “Guess your partner likes the confidence that comes from being a total fucking douchebag, bro! “

Then, in Jingle All The Way , Arnold reprises his role as “shitty inept spouse, ” sans being an ultra spy( he’s precisely a regular superhuman whale ), and again gets insanely resentful where reference is finds his wife’s been spend time with a certain popular-with-the-neighborhood-housewives Phil Hartman.

20 th Century Fox “I couldn’t help but notice your stupendous muscles. Well, I simply work out one muscle, and here’s a clue which one: THE PENIS.”

In Total Recall , Arnold’s wife-stealing fears play out in the most frightful direction possible: He experiences out the status of women he thinks is the adoration of his life is actually a double agent who’s secretly with Richter, a villain who embed phony retentions into his intelligence to stir him think he and his wife had a life together.

TriStar Pictures “What are the last five statements you’d ever expect a mortal with my face and hairline to say? No , not ‘THIS HAIRCUT WAS 60 DOLLARS.’ The reaction was ‘YOUR WIFE IS FUCKING ME.'”

All three cuckolders get their comeuppance, though. Arnold expends a vast quantity of CIA resources to illegally stage a escapade to get Paxton to pee-pee his gasps, Hartman goes refusal eggnog thrown on him when he goes full sneak, and in Total Recall , Arnold killed his bogus partner in the pate, says, “CONSIDA DAT A DIVORCE, ” then snaps Richter’s arms off and drops-off the rest of him down an elevator gibe. So in all cases, love triumphed in the end.

Hollywood Will Always, Always Destroy Mads Mikkelsen’s Eyes

Take a look at Mads Mikkelsen’s face. Particularly his eyes.

Sony Pictures Television Now, if you even can, try to tear your eyes away.

They seem all right, as far as seeings start. Nice brown pigment, good spacing and symmetry … no real troubles worth mentioning. And yet for some ground, every filmmaker’s action when they read those seeings is “I must exterminate them at all costs. Cut them out! Ignite them out! Accompanied me the moaning children of Mads Mikkelsen’s eyes so they are unable look upon their father’s ruin !!! “

We … we should probably start explaining.

The veer started in Casino Royale , Mikkelsen’s introduction to the world outside Scandinavia. In that movie, his character’s left gaze is horribly scarred, leaving him weeping blood in moments of high-pitched stress.

Eon Productions We’re talking about the one that had all the coloring carved out of it with a dull fork.

Mads’ gooey eye isn’t a plan extent, or even a setup for one of Bond’s one-liners. Instead, someone was look back Mikkelsen and expected that they fuck up his left attention before filming. And then someone completely different chose the same stuff two movies afterwards in Valhalla Rising . Mikkelsen’s character not only has a wad of joint scalp for a left see in the film, but he is actually announced One Eye.

Scanbox Entertainment Danish pinkeye does not fuck around.

Mikkelsen’s rising star intended his agent had more strength to bargain, so they must have reached a endanger in the movie after that. In The Three Musketeers , his reference is utterly still missing a left eye, but he gets to wear a cool attention patch over it instead of a prosthetic ball sack.

Summit Entertainment “I’m here to talk to you about the Musketeers initiative.”

But instead of slaking their hate of Mikkelsen’s eye, such an affront only formed Hollywood’s anger grow. The Union of Hollywood Theatrical Artists Specifically for Mads Mikkelsen’s Eyes affirmed, and so in Doctor Strange , Mikkelsen’s eyes are two burning embers at the center of eight pounds of makeup.

Marvel Studios In other statements, FABULOUS.

It’s obvious that Hollywood will not rest “until youve” pried those orbs right from Mikkelsen’s head, so Mads built the wise men move to branch out to other media. He became best friends with Metal Gear builder Hideo Kojima and agreed to wizard in his next tournament, Death Stranding . And if you’d like to see the brand-new and interesting direction Kojima is taking Mikkelsen, here’s a screenshot of what his attribute will look like!

Sony Interactive Entertainment You, uh … you got a little something in your …

Keanu Reeves Desires Being Strapped Into A Cyber Chair

Over the course of his movie busines, Keanu Reeves has traveled through time, goes in superman combats with infantries of computer programs, and once helped Sandra Bullock launch a bus in accordance with the arrangements that spat in the very mouth of physics. But the most frequent shenanigan Reeves guides into is finding himself tied to a cybernetic chair.

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He got a taste for it in Johnny Mnemonic , a movie about the 1990 s trying to create a black hole of self-parody. Keanu plays a human flash drive in a futuristic cyber world felt up by a person who is exceedingly, very cynical about humanity’s ability to miniaturize data storage. He enrols the virtual reality via a cyber chair, whereby he gambles the hazards of the over-storage meltdown to … you know what? It’s quite hard to explain Johnny Mnemonic in one paragraph. Reckon the various kinds of cyberpunk you would detest if you were into cyberpunk, and then include a dolphin. Wait … is the fact that it? Holy shit, we did it!

TriStar Pictures In that container behind the chair? That’s the dolphin we were talking about!

Later, Reeves starred in The Matrix , in which most of the planned and interior decides were made up of cyber chairs. Keanu was quickly growing Hollywood’s go-to star for narratives about people whose figures are in chairs but whose minds are absolutely not.

Warner Bros. Pictures Above: The People’s Choice winner for Actor Most Often in Cyber Chairs.

Keanu even manages to find a way to incorporate cyber chairs in movies about sorcery. In Constantine , the entitle attribute has a chair called “The Chair, ” which gives him get views of Lucifer’s son Mammon obtaining the Spear of Destiny. It’s another cinema we shouldn’t try to explain in a paragraph. The item is, he’s a wizard in a macrocosm of supernatural, and Keanu still ascertained a space to shoot his brain into virtual reality while buckled into a chair.

Warner Bros. Pictures “My contract clearly states that my psyche and my organization cannot ever appear in the same scene.”

Keanu doesn’t ever move his knowledge away when he’s strapped into a cyber chair. In The Day The Earth Stood Still , he plays an immigrant referred Klaatu. The tale identifies him tied to an everyday chair and pointlessly covered in sensors by authority agents who had to have been waiting their whole lives to fuck with an immigrant, yet still manage to screw the whole event up.

20 th Century Fox “Does your Earth sensor pick up how disappointing this all is? To everyone? “

The Day The Earth Stood Still signal Keanu’s growth as relevant actors. He substantiated he could get fastened to chairs with less and fewer devices. He disappeared even further in Knock Knock , in which he gets tied to a chair that exclusively includes headphones.

Lionsgate “I SAID! WE’RE BREAKING FOR LUNCH! WE’LL BE BACK IN ABOUT 90 MINUTES! GREAT WORK THIS MORNING, KEANU! “

Reeves lastly “made it” as a fully cyber-free chair actor in the acclaimed act movie John Wick , which has him tied to a chair with perfectly no electric wires or cables. It is attached to zero cyber dolphins and no alternating digital actualities. It was a long and confusing road getting here, but here he is …

Summit Entertainment

… living the reverie!

Jim Carrey Is Forever Plagued By Bugs

Before Jim& Andy documented the full and insufferable penetrations of his self-indulgence, Jim Carrey was a beloved performer known for his goofy overacting and pseudo-philosophical public meltdowns. One repetition topic in Carrey’s achievements, nonetheless, seems to have operated under the radar for years: Namely, that his rubbery face redoubles as a glitch magnet. Let’s start with the hover that crawls across his eyeball in the stupidly premised Yes Man .

Warner Bros. Pictures Yes Man is a movie about a serviceman who can’t say no to concepts! Even flies on his eyeball!

In Me, Myself, And Irene , Jim’s face and mouth get contained within imperfections, and he utterly doesn’t charge. Oddly enough, in Dumb And Dumber , he mentions swallowing a junebug off-camera as a intellect he’s not ravenous. We’re not sure what this makes, but Carrey’s references seem to be the only people who are totally fine with live insects piloting into their lips and eyes. Are all his movies secretly zombie movies? Candyman spinoffs?

20 th Century Fox “Turn out the brightness and say my refer 5 times in your reflect to be informed about! “

Here’s a recreation GIF from How The Grinch Stole Christmas , and we’re beginning to believe this wasn’t even in the dialogue. This is simply what happens when Carrey stops moving his lip for more than five seconds.

Universal Pictures What you are familiar with as Jim Carrey is merely an elastic pocket harbouring the legion of Swarmog, insect mass of Nebulo 8.

The man is comprised and filled with insects in a way that may account for his inhuman gyrations. It doesn’t seem to be limited to the laid, either. He once told a Jimmy Kimmel audience all about the mites that started living in his beard. When the time comes to Jim Carrey, the question isn’t whether or not he has a fault on him; it’s where, how many dozens, and how many eggs they are laying.

“Cut! We’re going to need to fumigate Jim again.”

Leonardo DiCaprio’s Toasts Are Omens Of Destruction

If you don’t weigh dopey comedies committing weddings, you don’t see toasts in very many movies. But when you do, there’s a 90 percentage likelihood Leo DiCaprio is the one dedicating it. Every single filmmaker agrees that the man sounds good delivering a spectacular speech with liquor in his hand.

Here we have the first instance, from Baz Luhrman’s Romeo+ Juliet . DiCaprio makes the “here’s to my love” discussion to what he thinks is his dead sweetheart before downing poison.

20 th Century Fox “So let’s create a glass of Drano to my dead lover. What? She’s not d- ACK! “

Seeing him deliver such a heartfelt addres with poison on hand, James Cameron wanted to see what the teenager could do with real alcohol. So in Titanic , he has Leo deliver a speech on how the peoples of the territories about to be eaten by the ocean should “make each day count.”

Paramount Pictures “To remaining heated and strong dive! Here here! “

And here he is in The Man In The Iron Mask , a movie where they applied the highest-paid performer on the planet’s honcho inside a barrel for most of the running duration. He’s toasting to his mother and his own predominate as king.

United Artists These toasts aren’t … working out absolutely amazing yet.

His next cinematic cup-hoist came in Gangs Of New York , in which he disguises his threat to kill the man who murdered “his fathers” as a toast.

Miramax “And here’s to the guy who killed my pa! Fuck you, buddy.”

Next, in the smash hit everyone surely attended, Revolutionary Road , DiCaprio makes a toast to Kate Winslet being pregnant, right before Michael Shannon manages to shatter the facade and shorten DiCaprio to a screaming, violent shipwreck. The moment is: Nothing good ever happens after a DiCaprio toast.

DreamWorks

Leonardo adorations toasting so much better that he does it even when it’s not appropriate. Here he is justifying the order of Inception . It’s one of the most important and complicated pronunciations anyone in a cinema has ever had to give, so he of course does it by standing up and raising a glass of wine.

Warner Bros. Pictures “So create your glass to how occasion labours differently inside a nightmare, but then likewise daydream parties have to fall out of their chairs to wake up, and if you die in your fantasies, you become a centaur in the next realm up, even if it’s real life.”

In Django Unchained , they had DiCaprio’s curiosity, and then they had his attention … a line that might have been clunky and overwritten had he not interspersed it with a laughable drink.

The Weinstein Company “It wasn’t truly a toast, I guess. I just like giving 40 percent of all movie scripts while I drink.”

In The Wolf Of Wall st. , Leo sarcastically toasts the impotent FBI agents to show them that dickheads can do anything they want if they’re rich enough.

Paramount Pictures “Here’s to the rest of you fuckers taking that exercise, extremely. I’m Leo DiCaprio, and each toast I induce is so, so awful.”

Every single one of this man’s toasts have contributed to pitch-dark and horrible events, but he deters doing them. You cannot stop him. Here he is in the Departed , holding a speedy toast right into the side of another man’s head.

Warner Bros. Pictures “Here’s to you, FUCKING HEAD.”

The point we’re trying to obligate is that if you recognize Leonardo DiCaprio start to raise his glass, run.

Warner Bros. Pictures “Here’s to you being too late. You’re already dead.”

It genuinely was merely a matter of time before someone put Leo on a wine glass . If you desired this article and crave more content like this, support our website with a visit to our Contribution Page. Please and thank you .

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airoasis · 5 years

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SEO For Beginners: 3 Powerful SEO Tips to Rank #1 on Google in 2019

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/seo-for-beginners-3-powerful-seo-tips-to-rank-1-on-google-in-2019/

SEO For Beginners: 3 Powerful SEO Tips to Rank #1 on Google in 2019

Do you need to rank quantity one on Google good I hate to claim it can be definitely fairly rough ten years ago it used to be relatively easy but now it can be hard and you recognize what except you watch this whole video you are not going to be in a position to rake number one on Google good day everyone i’m Neil Patel and today i am gonna share with you three ways that you would be able to rank quantity one on Google at present I obtained began an search engine optimization once I was sixteen years old I created a internet site known as advice monkey it not exists when you search for it you’re now not gonna see my internet site it was once a replication and a shitty replication of monster.Com and when I created the internet site I thought oh cool that is it humans are gonna come to my website online and i am gonna get site visitors however you understand what I popped up the website and nobody came to it from that factor i noticed there was once something referred to as seo that I had to do I paid a couple of advertising and marketing corporations to aid me with seo so that method I could rank number one on Google for terms like job search however you recognize what I gave them cash and that i got no outcome eventually as a sixteen 12 months historic kid I misplaced all my cash you most effective could make so much cash cleaning restrooms and settling on up trash so I had to gain knowledge of it but after I first started it used to be as simple as placing the key phrases to your website and also you could rank I want it was that handy at the moment number one focus on content material see Google has this replace called hummingbird and with hummingbird what they determined to do is internet sites who just have content material the whole lot is not going to do as good as web sites to focus on one single niche and are super thorough for instance shall we say you may have a internet site around relationship you probably have a website around courting and your article is let’s assume speakme about mmm 5 approaches that you may land a date or five methods which you could land your dream date if you emerge as breaking down hey go to matcom signal up and you’ll be able to find a match after you create a profile you’re not going to do this good but should you write a piece of writing that breaks down the right way to create a profile on fit.Com the ultimate photo the excellent description how you can be humorous even probably add video I don’t know i have not been on these relationship sites in a long time however if you happen to go rather extensive and also you smash down each little thing that they should do after which after you wreck down match.Com then you definitely speak about tinder then you speak about bumble then you definately speak about concord all the other structures then you even speak about the way you will have to reply to men and women and interact with them will have to you be hitting persons up what’s the very first thing you will have to say to them how must you reply where must you go to your first date right methods to carry out of your first date and ask him on a 2d date but if you are super thorough and your content material is so strong that people are like huh Wow I learn this article I shouldn’t have anymore questions and i do know what to do next that is how thorough you need a be so poke holes on your content and as many holes as you could and fill them all up so then that approach men and women are like this is the tip all site that you must come to be reading if you are eager about relationship on-line really what’s humorous I desire courting was this easy once I used to be more youthful i could not simply swipe an app like tinder and to find the next in shape I used to be sitting next to my buddy Terry the opposite day and he stored swiping on tinder and he’s like investigate this out swipe in synapse swipe in svet 30 plus fits inside a few minutes but again in my days you could have got to go to a bar and meet folks and virtually speak to them all correct so now that we acquired that wrong way let’s go into the 2d tip if you want to rank number one on Google the 2d tip i have for you is optimize your title tag and your Meta Description have you ever ever done a Google search and notice that each time you do it there’s this link on the high after which there is this one sentence with the link on the prime is referred to as a title tag and the outline under is known as a meta description now consider of it this manner should you seek for the phrase online relationship and you don’t see the phrase online dating you neither the title or the description are you gonna click on on the influence well if you’re there’s something incorrect considering that why would you click on on a outcomes that’s not related to what you’re looking for moreover to that have you ever ever accomplished a search for a term like online dating and have you ever ever noticed that the phrase is not within the title or description that is due to the fact that Google tracks who’s clicking on what listing and they’ve discovered that once a key phrase is within the checklist the same keyword that you are browsing for they be aware of you are far more more likely to click on by means of so to your title tag and your Meta Description make sure you include the key phrase but you cannot just include the keyword like on-line relationship right the simplest method good i’d do and that i want it was this straightforward i’ll just put on-line courting online relationship online dating online dating if I might put it 20 instances so persons comprehend that the articles on on-line dating I want i’d get more clicks but it’s no longer that easy yes you ought to include the keyword for your title and your description but it must be attractive if it would not float in a sentence it can be no longer effortless to read and it’s now not attractive or evoking curiosity no one is gonna click by means of the third factor i have for you is to use Google search console were you aware that Google offers you a tool that teaches you how to rank number one on Google sure i do know that sounds ridiculous however it is real and it can be referred to as Google search console if you’re no longer already a person of it signal up it doesn’t fee a dollar you’re missing out if you’re not making use of it I can’t emphasize that ample so now that you’re utilising Google search console supply it just a few days because it takes a while to populate information you’ll be able to see a reveal that suggests search analytics and this suggests you the entire pages in your website which can be getting you traffic but the cool thing about Google search console is in addition they show you which articles are becoming impressions and here is what I imply by way of impressions whilst you do a search on Google you do not at all times click by way of on a outcomes right in the event you did then you might be clicking through on ten results every time you did a search that would be insane what Google shows is how many people are seeing your checklist and clicking via and how many people do not click through so that they show you how many impressions you are getting the clicks and the clicking-by way of price and what you’ll be able to find is most commonly you’re lucky if you are getting round a 5 percentage click-by means of fee repeatedly 10 15 but ordinarily most of your pages are gonna be getting not up to 5 percentage click-through fee now the cool part about Google search console is they show you all the key terms that you’re getting impressions for and all of the ones you are getting speedy for now don’t forget the first tip was once about content material thoroughness and you need an editorial that talks about the whole lot below the solar good you should use Google search console to tie in again to the primary tip so sort of quantity one and three are associated in which you wish to have to take all of the keyword phrases you’re getting impressions for and start adding them to your replica now don’t simply shove them in and have your content be key phrase wealthy where you understand anybody reads it and all it is is online relationship tinder Harmonie dating on-line assembly any individual from online courting correct if any person was once studying your article and it sounded just like that they may be gonna leap off your website considering that that suggests your content sucks and it just has too many key phrases it has to waft naturally and be academic so you wish to have to take those keywords that you’re seeing in Google search console and add them to the article now we now have a piece of writing on Instagram and it teaches you the right way to recover from 300 unique Instagram followers per day the article is around 10,000 phrases when I first wrote that article it wasn’t 10,000 words is roughly 2500 I went to Google search console I noticed the entire folks which are browsing for terms concerning the article I introduced them within that article I made it more thorough and what my site visitors greater than tripled to that article yes it’s that simple and after I made that fluctuate it did not happen correct away but i realized the outcome inside 50 days that’s now not a long time so now let’s recap on the pointers 1 make your content super thorough to be certain you include the key words within your title tag and meta description but also when you are doing your title and outline be certain your voguing curiosity and you are creating mighty title that everybody needs to learn and click by way of and number 3 use the free software that Google offers you that’ll aid you rank quantity one that is Google search console use these three matters and that you may rank quantity one no longer just one day but in addition correct now now that you’ve got discovered these three recommendations I assignment you where i would like you to take these approaches and enforce them and then after you implement them within the subsequent forty five days i need you to leave a remark with your outcome in view that if you’re no longer doing good that suggests i am not blissful and i do know these approaches work and that’s why i’m challenging you when you consider that for those who put into effect them you are gonna see outcome and you’re gonna be ecstatic and your life goes to vary and i need to build a trip of like-minded individuals we all take motion and we help each and every other develop so I project you to take motion and put in force these three steps now furnish it i know you can be busy and you may not be equipped to do all of them correct away however simply decide on one it does not have to be time-drinking choose one in every of them make the exchange possibly which you can begin with the second tactic due to the fact that that is the easiest one put in force it and that you could start seeing results right away so make sure you subscribe to this video and this channel and i’m going to see you within the next video and we are going to hold serving to every different grow

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batterymonster2021 · 5 years

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SEO For Beginners: 3 Powerful SEO Tips to Rank #1 on Google in 2019

New Post has been published on https://hititem.kr/seo-for-beginners-3-powerful-seo-tips-to-rank-1-on-google-in-2019/

SEO For Beginners: 3 Powerful SEO Tips to Rank #1 on Google in 2019

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apsbicepstraining · 6 years

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5 Actors Who Do The Same WTF Specific Thing In Every Movie

Arnold Schwarzenegger Is Constantly Perturbed About Forgetting His Partner To Leering Shitheads

20 th Century Fox “Guess your partner likes the confidence that comes from being a total fucking douchebag, bro! “

20 th Century Fox “I couldn’t help but notice your stupendous muscles. Well, I simply work out one muscle, and here’s a clue which one: THE PENIS.”

Hollywood Will Always, Always Destroy Mads Mikkelsen’s Eyes

Take a look at Mads Mikkelsen’s face. Particularly his eyes.

Sony Pictures Television Now, if you even can, try to tear your eyes away.

We … we should probably start explaining.

Eon Productions We’re talking about the one that had all the coloring carved out of it with a dull fork.

Scanbox Entertainment Danish pinkeye does not fuck around.

Summit Entertainment “I’m here to talk to you about the Musketeers initiative.”

Marvel Studios In other statements, FABULOUS.

Sony Interactive Entertainment You, uh … you got a little something in your …

Keanu Reeves Desires Being Strapped Into A Cyber Chair