#thecatlife

[lettersfromthecatcave]

Why leaving the city to settle in the province is one of the best decisions in my life

I already drafted a post earlier, pero nawala lol. So, here's my second attempt.

Before the pandemic, I was living in a condo along EDSA with my then-fiancee now-husband. We paid 18K monthly for a studio-type condo, with pool and gym amenities. It was a dream come true for me since my previous homes in the metro were in not-so-Instagrammable places.

So a bit of a history of my living situations in NCR:

I left Laguna since HS for college and stayed in a dormitory. There were about 2-4 girls per room and my parents who crawled my expense through graduation often paid my rent late.

Then, I graduated and vowed to not have my parents pay a single cent for me anymore. I lived independently paying ALL of my living expenses including rent, food. My first home that I paid for myself is another dormitory with about a 7 x 7 room shared by another girl.

Then, I lived in with my then-fiancee and toxic ex in a 2-BR apartment in the middle of a busy Manila baranggay. When he left me, along with needing to pay some unpaid rent, I moved into a smaller a 1-BR apartment. Both were in the middle of a noisy, crazy Manila neighborhood where people drink and gossip 24/7.

So, fast forward to the pandemic doom, I got initial info (being an EHS & BCP person) that there would be lockdowns. My then-fiancee now-husband and I then rushed packing and left our condo unit (even after spending hours panic-buying some supplies) to go home. We never really imagined the pandemic lasting years, so for the first 3 months, we lived with our parents... transitioning between his parents' place and mine while we work remotely. But then, since we are getting married, we decided to buy a house. If there's one thing the pandemic made us realize is that HEALTH IS IMPORTANT... and he and I both know that we cannot live in a boxed condo as a permanent home. Luckily, his work perks allowed us to choose a model unit (fully furnished but a bit outdated) so it's basically ready for occupancy. It took us barely 6 months to get the papers settled (while also preparing for our wedding) but we got it.

We now live in a 2-story house located in a city in Laguna, near an SLEX exit. I'll save the logistical, administrative costs and construction gulatan costs for another story, but we were able to save enough to have some improvements like a gate, home gym, pocket garden, and repainting. We'll be spending our third Christmas (WOW) here and yes, it's still the life I want because:

Province life allows for a slower, mellower life. I am not sure if I can put it into words but there's something about waking up, walking down the stairs, taking a peek at the window and seeing Lolas sweeping their front yard, smiling and waving at you. There are neighbors who even if we rarely go out, reaches out to us to ask how we are, share a laugh or two. There are kids going to and from school. Even the traffic is way way better, not only because its decongested but because people are not in a rush? Like, kapag naluwas kami para pumasyal or for work, even a 2-3 second delay from the go-signal would cause people behind us to hit their horns like they are dying. Gulat na gulat kami at how full of rage drivers are, while here, people tend to give way. Though may mga kupal minsan, pero like 1:50 ang ratio compared sa NCR na 40:50 ata.

Everything is accessible. Maybe it's the smart location that the village is located, but Nuvali is 15 minutes away so we get to do our weekend runs and grocery shopping there every weekend. When we want a different view, Alabang or Makati is barely an hour away. We also have access to foodpanda and Grab, so we can also order food. And, when we grow tired of that, we also have an online Facebook page for the village where we can order food and have it delivered too. Kanina lang nga, dahil naka-isolation kami, pati pandesal inorder namin sa online village store.

The view can easily put you in a better mood. I remember during the MECQs, we'll just jump in the car and do a quick drive-thru run to Mcdonald's or Starbucks. We'll sometimes bring the cats with us para masanay sila. We'll eat inside the car, just open the windows a bit and see lush greens around us. On days when work feels too much or when I get depressive or anxious episodes, we'll just drive around, and instantly, I feel better as we pass by trees, farm lands and sunset view. When we run too, there's always a mini trail to discover.

We are nearer to our families. Though we may not be able to visit them as often as we want, but connecting is easier. We can have lunch outs over the weekends, or they can easily visit us at home and spend some time together. Malawak yun bahay at bakuran, so they can sleep over. Kapag may emergency, iba pa din yun may mga kakilala kahit paano na pwedeng takbuhan. We have my husband's office mates near the village and my Dad's office is also 30 minutes away from where we live. So, minsan sa amin din sya nauwi. Our house also offers a breathe of fresh air sa Mom ko when she wants to relax and play with her apos aka cats LOL.

Expenses are cheaper. Gas, groceries, services are cheaper here. Though we are not safe from the ~golden era~, we do have options like talipapa or wet markets. Since nearer din kami sa mga sakahan or isdaan, mas mura din talaga yun mga fresh produce. Sa Nuvali and LB area, madalas din may community market. Also, the 18K rent we paid for the condo? Imagine we pay less than that and we are owning this house after a few years. To share, even the 7K rent I paid for the 1-BR apartment can pay for a house here in Laguna too. No, I don't think renting is a waste of money since tinitirhan nyo naman sya, but imagine how getting a house can be a future asset (yun lupa, hindi yun bahay, but that's also another topic). But basically, LAND does not decrease in value ever. Ever ever. Kaya din bahay kinuha namin over condo.

There is space - to move, to breathe and to grow. Literally and figuratively. Literally, I am lucky to have my own home gym, and garden and garage that like now that we are in isolation, we can move around. It's easier to partition our lives between work and home, kasi may home office din ako. May place to sleep, to eat, to work out and that's important for an ADHD person like me. There also is room to grow... ewan ko pero the more I see how people can live in the provinve, the more lumawak yun pananaw at pangarap ko. No, I don't want a bigger house, but I now know that having a slow and steady life is possible. Yun, hindi kailangan pagod at ngarag to earn money, because people here, maraming may passive income and all. Parang here, money flows in even when you don't do much. Hindi ko ma-explain pero siguro totoo yun kapag mas malawak yun paligid mo, mas feeling mo din hindi ka nakakahon? (Though, we really need to do some spring cleaning LOL kasi ang kalat na ng bahay.)

My mental health has greatly improved. Probably because of all the reasons mentioned above. But, you know, taking myself away from that hustle and bustle of the city, really allowed me to slow down and think about what I really want in life. Dito sa probinsya ko narealize na life doesn't need to be complicated. Dito ko din na-allow ang sarili ko stop when I tend to want want want a lot? Kasi, in the midst of every grit and grind work day, masaya ako to just slow down, have a coffee or a glass of wine and spend time with my husband and cats. And really, that's all I need. In a world that tells you that you need to work-out, prep food, be excellent at work, learn new things, have a hobby, stay connected with loved ones and all sorts of MUSTS, the province life allowed me to tone it down and just do what I can. The more we do so much minsan, the more we lose who we are... or that's how I feel. The province life allows me to be just me~ whoever I want to be.

I know not everyone has this privilege, and for this I am grateful - for the opportunities that came our way, for the blessings given to us and for the hard work we put in. 🧿 It's weird pero the pandemic really did turn our life around, kasi naipakita sa akin kung ano yun importante - Health, connections and peace of mind. Yan lang pala talaga kailangan ko.

So, anyways, ayun lang. If you have the chance, give it a think. Alam ko hindi lahat possible ito sa work nila, but this is also why I chose to make it a non-negotiable when I consider work offers. Either remote or hybrid. Because this is now home and I can't sacrifice this peace for career progression or additional pay.

I hope you read this not feeling like I am boasting. Sa totoo lang, hindi ko inakalang dadating ako sa ganitong level of contentment... o baka natuto lang talaga akong maging grateful sa araw-araw. Good or bad, there's always something positive (gaya ng antigen test namin, eme). Nagpapasalamat lang talaga ako sobra for being here... so I really try to pay it forward too. My husband, I noticed, does the same na din. Every chance we get, we share our blessings.

Universe, thank you. I trust that 2023 would only bring us closer to the simple farm life we want. 🧿. 🪬. 👁️‍🗨️.

[mikehaysbooks]

I guess after you kill & eat an entire adult squirrel a long nap is in order. #TheCatLife #DJtheCat

[bluebettiesboutique]

Wonder what my Lou is thinking 🤔? #thecatlife #lovemylou #tgif ? Missing my cat mom ? What's the neighbor doing over there? What's for dinner? How can I escape to go play outside? Why does my human always have to take so many pictures of me! Or Plotting on how to take over the universe! 😁😆🤔🤔🤔 #mysweetfurbaby🐾 https://www.instagram.com/p/CTGR8K4MCmM/?utm_medium=tumblr

[reneesrockingredesign]

When it's too cold to go outside, you lay on the floor and pretend you are somewhere warmer. #wecandream #thecatlife #lazysaturday https://www.instagram.com/p/B__fr84lUts/?igshid=arfdbymk4zkx

[slivtom3545-blog]

These Cat's Tho. #thelovecats #yearofthecat #thecatlife #9lives #thecure #robertsmith https://www.instagram.com/p/B5RMy9_lvny2F6a1lQYvMnSOgN4SVdXA10slfI0/?igshid=1063r14cqomlr

[marty-the-fierce-blog]

My face when the delivery guy won't come bring my adoptaversary present 🎁 😾 . . #angrycat #socutee #grumpycats #ihavenopatience #cutecatsclub #meowpurtee #thecatlife #lovemykitty #somuchpersonality #purrfect_meowdel (at Cluj-Napoca) https://www.instagram.com/p/B1q6S9FIIt4/?igshid=vy1tgqmvfwz3

[thatlaylachick]

"Excuse me, but may I borrow your phone?" 🐈 Silly, Aphrodite! 🧡 #catsofinstagram #tortoiseshellcat #iphone7plus #gato #thecatlife https://www.instagram.com/p/B0bwUaTHJwZ/?igshid=3dt48l8tk0ux

[carmen391]

Los lugares mas random para dormir, ella los encuentra #BellaCat #TheCatLife https://www.instagram.com/p/BwrvcmQnuEiCHvwa9jKONa5Z5daVe1804mslXQ0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=hp0wqq3668ty

[theonlyladyjai]

She sleeps on me all night. And now, all weekend! #catlife #thecatlife #ohtobeacat #scottishfold #scottishfolds #scottishfoldsoninstagram #scottishfoldlover #scottishfoldsof_ig #ilovemyscottishfold #scottishfoldofinstagram #scottishfolds #cat #cats #catsofinstagram #catstagram #cats_of_instagram #catlady #ilovemycats #ilovecat #catlover #catlovers https://www.instagram.com/p/BuR-cReAH0K/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=yjfjyirofba0

[faygogyrl]

#furbaby #thecatlife

[loveunspokenllc]

Here she goes again. My girl April #catlovers #catlover #paweating #kittenlife #thecatlife #catsofinstagram #ilovemycat #cattricks (at Stone Mountain, Georgia) https://www.instagram.com/p/CAf3FnAHHJv/?igshid=183u1vktcn96t

[lettersfromthecatcave]

Whenever I read people's stories about the wisdom or the properties/business built by their parents, my heart hurts a little.

I have classmates who are sent to graduate school or further studies without having to worry about tuition or books or living expenses. I have work colleagues who talked about their choice to rest, work on the family business until they figure what they want to do. I have friends who were gifted with business capitals. I have friends who talked about treating their parents to a trip... and being able to do it because they only pay for their own living expenses.

Then here I am, always worrying about my parents' health and making the dependents' HMO a deciding factor when I choose job offers. Here I am, always needing to raise funds for bail or for an operation or for a family trip. Here I am, needing to put in a percentage of my earnings to make sure I share budget so my parents have enough to eat, to buy medicine.

Sometimes I wonder how it feels to have that security as a child... not needing to worry if your tuition loan would be paid on time, if you have baon for next week or to pay for projects. Not needing to consider applying into bars, just because your rakets are no longer making ends meet. Sometimes I wonder what life choices I might have made for my career, for my self, if I need not worry about keeping my parents secure.

Nakakapagod na din maging anak. I love them, but I hope they made better choices when they were young. I know they tried their best, but lately, my Father has been heavy to carry. My Mother has changed for the better, yet she is chained to this man who could not provide for his family, and even expects his children to pay for everything he wants. I am so tired of seeing my Dad and getting angry, irritated, sad, sorry for how his life turned out... when he does nothing to change.

I had the best laughters as a child because of my Father. I was a Daddy's girl. But, adulthood shows you who the toxic parent really was. It shows you that the villain was actually the heroine trying to pull the family together, making ends meet, yet serving as a wife.

I pray God helps me process these emotions. That, and maybe I need a session.

[mikehaysbooks]

DJ seems to do his best work on holidays. This morning it was a mouse. This afternoon, I heard a squirrel barking up a commotion on the garage roof and then go silent. A few minutes later, DJ proudly marches this in front of me. It’s a good day to be a cat by any standard. #TheCatLife https://www.instagram.com/p/CTfkQbhl6Oa/?utm_medium=tumblr

[thetarotman]

Oh, my Great Goddess! It finally happened! I finally recorded #bastthekitten when she makes that squeak toy sound, while holding something in her mouth. My fellow #blackcatlovers and #catlovers enjoy this video!! #blackkittens #blackcats #cats #livingwithmultiplecats #thecatlife https://www.instagram.com/p/B59hIJtHK2x/?igshid=1pedecu5ipq8j

[itsbuddielove]

Brother and sister enjoying the morning together. #CatsAreCool #TheCatLife #CatMe #Meow #CatsOfInstagram (at Mount Ephraim, New Jersey)

[shanemcguirenet-blog]

The lazy life of Anna!! #cat #catsofinstagram #feline #felinefriends #lazycat #thecatlife #lazykitty #vtshane (at Easthampton, Massachusetts)