#their fight lasted precisely thirty seconds and i remain starved

[weekend-whip]

Kai + G

G. A Fistfight (Crystalized spoilers! But, like, Legacyverse flavored)

(Send me a letter and a character and I’ll write a small fic!)

AO3 Version

. . .

If we really wanna be technical here, Jay started it.

Kai grunts, his stomach smarting from where Jay just plunged a kick into it. All he did was knock over a cup—entirely by accident, mind you—and now Kai finds himself haphazardly fighting to get back into a standing position. 

Somewhere in the background he hears Lloyd howling for them to stop, Zane half-heartedly trying to intervene, and Cole getting ready to jump on the defense. But all Kai can see in his red-tinged vision is Jay scowling at him, sparks flying at his fingertips.

Jay then lets out some mangled, thunderous cry of emotion, firing off a lightning bolt. Its light dances off all the reflective metal in the hangar, washing over the room in a blinding haze. Shielding his eyes, Kai skirts away from the attack. The static in the air becomes unbearably thick.

Kai glances back at the scorch mark taking the place of where he once stood, then back at Jay, who now charges at him with reckless abandon and irises blazing blue. Kai’s face contorts into a sneer, unrepressed and uncontrolled, all while his own eyes begin to burn with the fire crackling in his soul. Flames lick the center of his palms.

Maybe this had just been a long time coming. 

“Oh, that’s it.”

Kai howls and throws his arms up, conjuring up a shield of fire to protect against whatever Jay’s about to do. Jay claps his hands together and pierces. through it, going right for Kai’s shoulders to drag him down with him. They both hit the floor with a hard thud—Kai kicks Jay off and sweeps his leg around, only to backflip when Jay comes back at him with Spinjitzu. 

Kai flips through the air and alights on his feet, weaving to the left away from another stray bolt of lightning. Jay keeps firing off electricity as hard and as fast as he can, leaving Kai to cast a trail of fire ahead of him and merge into it. Jay sends an electric blast alongside the trail of fire, beating out Kai’s speed. It knocks Kai out the fire; Kai gasps, rolling along the ground.

He catches a glimpse of Jay as the world spirals around; the other’s eyes are sparking with his Element, so profusely that his irises can’t even be seen. The brilliant cobalt that’s normally of a beacon of bright ideas or light-hearted humor has been overtaken by an all-consuming blank white rage. 

It’s as if he’s suddenly become soulless. 

The floor squeaks as Kai scrambles away; Jay’s too fast to hit directly, he realizes. Especially true when the blue fool starts warping around the room, always blipping away the second before Kai’s blasts can land. Kai’s tempted to just light this whole place on fire, leaving nowhere left for Jay to run where Kai can’t reach–

Jay warps behind him and drives a punch into his back, and Kai’s had just about enough of this.

As he falls, Kai whirls on his heel and snags Jay’s wrist. Jay squawks; Kai whips into Spinjitzu, taking Jay along for the ride until he flings him into the table where his little cup collection resides. Jay crashes into it chest first, splitting it in half. All the cups roll and clatter to the floor; some breaking, some spilling, but all of them losing their water in some manner. Jay gawks in horror at the accumulated puddle, then gnashes his teeth together.

He sets his sights on Kai, and like the flip of a switch, he’s suddenly gone.

Kai instinctively takes a step back, and everything slows to a crawl. Light bursts in front of Kai as Jay reappears, mouth opened to release a raw, unhinged scream that buzzes in Kai’s ears like distant, oncoming thunder. Jay’s right hand slowly falls back, curling into a fist, completing the circuit, and igniting with a thousand volts of raw power.

Time speeds back up, Jay’s cries increase in a deafening crescendo, and he’s three seconds away from blasting Kai into oblivion—

—but Kai catches the punch, dissipating the lightning into nothing more than static sparks. Smoke and force fly outwards from how hard Kai stands his ground. Jay remains in the air, and yet, he refuses to quit trying to push through. He is the unstoppable force to Kai’s immovable object, and maybe, just maybe, if he can get him to budge—

“...just knock it OFF already, Jay!” Kai grits through his teeth, digging his fingers into Jay’s fist. Jay winces, but refuses to stop. “Why are you getting this worked up over a dumb cup?!”

“...the CUP?! It’s not about the cup, idiot!” Jay screams, the words vibrating with thunderous rage. He locks fingers with Kai before dragging him forward and down, thrusting him straight into the floor. “It’s about how little you actually CARE!”

The words mentally knock Kai off-balance even more than he already is; Jay drives a knee into Kai’s stomach to make him back off, then punts him away with another kick. Kai falters, falling onto his haunches. 

Peeling his face off the ground with a grunt, Kai funnels every bit of irritation within him into his glare. 

“What—” Urgh, jeez, his chest is going to be so bruised after this... “—What are you even talking about?!” 

“You...” Jay’s so choked up by anger he can hardly talk, but, finally, he lets up on trying to fight. Still hovering, his hands fly to his hair, clutching at his head as he wails, “You hardly reacted at all when she left! Like it didn’t even matter!”

That statement is so wildly accusatory and unbelievable that it throws Kai for a loop. 

“What?!” 

“Why am I the only one that cares that she’s gone?!” Jay hollers. “No one else tried to stop her, no one cried for her as much as I did...and you guys moved on like she was never here at all!”

“You know that isn’t true! First off, she made that choice; she chose to do that for us, and we respected it!” Kai snarls back, hands shaking in front of him. “But even though we did, it hurt like hell! It still hurts, but we can’t spend every day for the rest of our lives consumed by this, Jay! It’s not going to change anything!”

Jay’s face morphs into an expression of shock as Kai lurches, body quaking with poorly repressed anger. He glares at Jay through one eye, doing his absolute best to not just implode right then and there. 

“Cole’s been trying this whole time to make sure her sacrifice wasn’t in vain...Zane turned off his entire ability to feel human just to lock away the hurt her loss left...and Lloyd gave up being the Green Ninja because he couldn’t stand the thought of her being gone!”

Cole and Lloyd wince in the background; Zane doesn’t react at all.

“And you ran off to submerge yourself in the memory of her. And that alone was fine, whatever, it wasn’t hurting anybody...but you don’t get to say we cared any less because we carried on, because what would have been the point in Nya saving our lives if we weren’t even going to live them afterward?!”

Fire bursts out of Kai in furious flashes; Cole and Lloyd wilt away from it, while the flames merely dissipate the second they brush against Zane. Jay finally lowers himself back onto the ground. Guilt washes over him, slowly coming back into himself. 

“But she was your sister,” Jay says, making one last attempt to understand. “She was everything to you...you raised her, you became a ninja for her, you just...let her go, and—”

“…and what? You think I felt nothing?!” Kai grits his teeth, grinding every word he speaks between them. Wisps of smoke leak out from the corners of his mouth. His irises glint with embers. “You think...I still don’t?!”

Kai throws his head back and roars like a lion; Jay recoils, shrinking back as a stream of fire rips from Kai’s throat and shoots so high that almost hits the ceiling of the hangar. Kai snaps back down, fire trailing after him, until it spreads outwards like wildfire. Cole has to conjure up an earth wall to block the flames from reaching Lloyd and Zane, and yet they still wash across the rest of the room in a sea of fire.

Just as he threatened before. Just as he tried not to do before. 

Surrounded by his Element, Kai heaves with every breath. The flames recede in and out with every intake, every exhale, similar to the waves of the ocean against a beach. He lets the heat rise and rise and rise, transforming the hangar into a self-baking oven. The thermometer measures Kai’s growing lack of patience, growing higher and higher until it’s pushed to the threat of breaking.

Kai stalks forward, a predator on the prowl. The flames give way for him in his approach, opening a direct line straight to the now-cowering Jay.

“Is this what you would have wanted, Jay?! Is this the sheer, unabashed fury you wanted to bear witness to?!”

The flames climb into the air again; this time they do hit the ceiling, flooding the whole hangar in a dangerous blaze.

“You want me to get mad?! To get outrageously upset?! To just throw away everything else I care about and make people feel as endlessly terrible the way I do?! To do exactly what you did?!”

Jay struggles to breathe through the heat. He gets dizzy and sinks to his knees, vision going blurry–or, wait, is that just the waves of heat everywhere...?

“You want me to just absolutely lose my mind because this awful, unfair world keeps taking away the most important things from me?!”

But either way, the only thing that’s clear right now are Kai’s infrared eyes in the midst of the orange flames, somehow sporting a more prominent glow than the endless sea of fire that currently envelops them all. Those eyes boil with a once-buried rage that has been simmering for a year...all channeling into Kai’s fist, outwardly burning without shame.

There’s a split second where Kai locks eyes with Jay–just a second–and he pounces, that singular fiery fist ready to return the favor from before. 

Jay, still on his knees, throws up his arms to protect his head on instinct, fearing the strike he’s about to endure. Some small voice in the back of his mind is telling him that hey, maybe he does deserve this—

—but the fist thuds near-harmlessly against his chest, no longer burning. Kai’s hand trembles in the aftermath. 

“…w-well, I’m not going to. I refuse to give the world the satisfaction.”

Kai exhales, and in a single whoosh, all the flames in the hangar are quelled on the spot. 

The fist then twists, grabbing Jay by the collar and dragging him so close that they’re basically face to face. Jay whimpers as Kai forces him to look him in the eye. Both of their gazes are still full of their elements...but then, it becomes clear that they’re both also holding off tears. 

“...who are you, Jay, to say that no one else cared about her death. Just because you and her were yin and yang, that doesn’t make anyone else less important, regardless of how they process their grief!”

Kai hiccups, cursing himself for faltering only now.

“...of course I was angry and upset. But...that’s how I get about everything. For Nya, I...” Kai shrugs, feigning aloofness. “...I didn’t want to become worse. I wanted to try and be something better this time, for her sake.” 

Unable to maintain Kai’s intense stare any longer, Jay lolls his head back, tears falling down his cheeks. He sniffles pitifully, shaking his head.

“I’m sorry…I tried to hurt you…”

Kai nods, his grip going slack. “I’m sorry too.”

“I just—” Jay cuts off, strangled by emotion. “I miss her so much, Kai…!”

“I know, bud. I do too. We all do.” 

Kai releases Jay at last, the fists thrown earlier turning into a hug that both desperately need. They throw themselves at each other like magnets; Jay buries his face in Kai’s shoulder, body wracked with sobs, while Kai clutches desperately at Jay’s clothes. Kai eventually breaks down too, hiding his face in the jungle of curls upon his brother’s head. 

“...but she wouldn’t want this from us, either.”

[perriewinklenerdie]

Touch me (Ethan x f!MC)

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x Claire Herondale

Word count:  2,3 k

Summary: Chapter 19 rewrite. Ethan and Claire actively reach out to feel each other’s touch after what happened to Leland and Caroline. 

Warnings: none

A/N: Because you can’t tell me that E and C didn’t so much as look at each other while talking to Baz about not touching. Ft. how the two of them leaving the hospital actually went down.

Baz’s vision blurred as he watched Leland and Caroline leave, the weight of their situation too heavy for him to move on from. In his lack of focus, he completely failed to notice the change in the atmosphere that was pushed even further with his next words.

“Can you even imagine? Never being able to touch the person you care about most in the world?” he wiped his cheeks, his voice a bit shaky when he talked. “Could there be anything worse?”

Ethan’s eyes shifted to Claire without him even thinking about doing it. The whole ordeal brought back the memories of the night he spent by her side while she was fighting to stay alive. He’s experienced not being able to touch the person he cared about. The time they both spent in the isolation room, a thick layer of plastic between them with every touch they shared. Touching, yes, but not feeling anything; not the softness of her skin, not the warmth of her body.

It seemed as though Claire was thinking of the exact same night in their lives. Her gaze found his almost instantly, prompted by Baz’s words. Having experienced it, at least to some extent, she found herself feeling even worse for the married couple.

“It’s horrible. I don’t even want to think about it.” a shiver ran through her, making her whole body shake at an unpleasant feeling. Ethan followed his first instinct, reaching for her hand with his, letting their fingers brush against each other. She reciprocated the gesture, hooking her ring finger with his and giving it a firm squeeze. With a heavy sigh, she continued. “Every time I imagine it, it feels like my heart is breaking again.”

Ethan blinked a couple of times, trying to clear his head. His old self would have said something about how the couple would get through this. People went through worse things, after all. But this new version of Ethan Ramsey, the one that fell for the woman standing next to him, the one that almost lost the said woman before he could even let her know that he cared about her, couldn’t bring himself to say that. Because yes, people did get through situations like these or worse. But they shouldn’t have to.

“It’s a terrible thing.” He started, looking at Claire as he said it. “Touch is such a vital part of creating emotional connections between people. To live with someone for years and then suddenly not be able to even touch their hand…”

“No one should have to adapt to that. I...” Baz nodded his head in agreement, his face falling even more. “I think I need to find Zaid and give him a big hug. I’ll see you both later.”

As Baz disappeared behind the corner, the shy touch of their fingers turned into the bolder, proper hand hold. Ethan couldn’t pinpoint what was it exactly that he was feeling, but there was a sense of a certain urgency in the way his thumb grazed hers. The warmth of her skin passed onto him, making him feel feverish.

Claire turned towards him, taking his other hand into hers delicately. The world as they knew it was about to fall down in a few hours, with the hospital closing and neither of them having any plans clarified. And yet, standing in the middle of the hall, holding hands and looking into each other’s eyes, there was nothing else for them to care about.

A quiet sound of her phone burst the bubble they were in, reminding them that there was still a thing or two to be done before they left the hospital for the last time. She smiled at him, blinking slowly, then rose onto the tips of her toes and pressed her lips to his cheek tenderly.

He missed her touch the moment they let go of each other’s hands.

~~

Thirty minutes later, Ethan walked into the diagnostic team’s office for the second to last time. Caroline’s patient file had to get sorted and put away, and after that, there were a few patients he had to discharge.

The office, as it turned out, wasn’t empty. Leaning over the desk and scribbling something in the file was Claire, her hair out of her ponytail, creating a curtain around her face. She greeted him with a hum, not looking up from her work just yet.

Since he last saw her, he tried and succeeded at diagnosing his own condition. Come to think of it, he’s been battling it ever since the night of the attack. This need to hold onto her in any way the situation allowed. This urge to feel her skin against his. This starvation for any form of contact with her.

He hasn’t felt the need for anything or anyone quite like this before. All his life, he saw himself as an independent man that didn’t require anyone to succeed. He still didn’t, but he didn’t want to be alone anymore. He felt a strong pull towards her, like they were two magnets with opposite charges, and they couldn’t help but be drawn together. Like there was no way he could stay away from her now, even if he tried.

Ethan took a few quiet steps, cautious to not make too much noise. He looked at what she was doing, resting his chin against her shoulder, his arms wrapping around her middle and pulling her flush against his body. Claire hummed again, turning her head to nuzzle her nose against his.

“I see you already took care of the paperwork.” He muttered, breathing in the scent of her perfume. She placed her signature at the bottom of the page, then clicked her pen and tossed it onto the desk.

“I know you hate doing it, so I did it for you.”

“That’s the most attractive thing you’ve ever said to me.” he growled playfully, biting her shoulder. She giggled, leaning back into his embrace.

“If I knew that’s all it took, I would have been doing your paperwork a long time ago.”

They remained that way for a long moment, giddy and light despite the circumstances. They were always heavy on witty banter, but since their relationship became more serious, this bright tone bled into their conversations more and more often, especially when they were alone.

Eventually, she twisted out of his hold with a squeeze of his hands, grinning as she walked backwards. “Discharge the last patients and meet you here in a few?”

Ethan nodded his head in answer to her question, watching her go and immediately feeling like he wanted to follow her.

~~

Having discharged his last patient, he walked to the elevator, heading to his office. He pressed the button and took a step towards the wall as he entered, waiting for the doors to close. A distant shout attracted his attention, causing him to stall the elevator just enough to allow Claire to catch up and join him in the confined space.

“Thanks.” She panted, trying to catch her breath after running a marathon down the hall. He fought the smirk, pressing his hand to his face briefly. Claire fell against the wall, her shoulders moving slower and slower as her lungs returned to their normal pace of work. “It’s a miracle I didn’t trip.” Her words triggered a fit of laughter from him, unable to resist it anymore. “Don’t laugh at me, Ramsey, we both know how much of a possibility that was.”

She swatted his arm with her palm cheekily but failed to retreat it fast enough. Ethan’s hand wrapped around her and held her in place. His gaze fell onto their joined hands, then slowly trailed to meet her eyes. The air around them cracked with electricity, atmosphere getting thicker with each passing second.

His hand reached forward, blindly searching for the control pad. Looking away from her for just a second, he found the emergency stop button and pressed it, both of them feeling the elevator halt almost immediately.

The papers he was holding got thrown onto the floor in a flash. His now unoccupied hands were free to grab her by any place he could reach. With a low growl, he pressed his lips to hers, keeping her as close to him as humanly possible with his fingers curling into her hair.

A surprised gasp slipped from her in between the kisses, the intensity of the entirety of Ethan’s being pushing the air out of her lungs. Without any precision at all, she grazed the fabric of his shirt with her hands on their journey up his body, only to finally grip the collars and pull him down to allow herself more comfort than her current position provided.

Ethan’s hands left her hair, traveling everywhere and being nowhere at the same time. He took handfuls of her white coat, creasing the fabric as he pushed it aside. With wild abandonment, he traced the lines of her body, squeezing her bottom teasingly and grinning when her lips left his for a stunned moment.

Going further, he raised the material of her sweater upwards, exposing the skin of her back to the cool air of the elevator. His hands felt like red hot metal in contrast, sending feverish shivers through her body with each brush, squeeze and pull of his fingers.

He whispered her name, sounding like the highest praise in the utterly silent confinement of the elevator. He touched her like a starved man, unable to press her hard enough to him, pull her close enough. All the small gestures of affection he gave her that day cumulated into an enormous expression of longing and want that they were experiencing right now.

Claire’s fingers slowly let go of the fabric she was gripping tightly, blindly reaching for the buttons of his shirt. Undoing the first one, then the second one, she exposed the patch of his skin around that area, pushing the material to the side.

Reaching for one of his hands, both of which were still pressing against the skin of her back under her sweater, she brought it to her front and upwards. Brushing over the lace of her bra, she pushed their joined hands even further up, until she reached the location she had in mind. Breaking the kiss, she leaned back to look into his eyes when she pressed his hand to her chest, right where her racing heart was, mirroring the gesture with her other hand on his torso.

Time stopped. The intensity dropped to a tiny simmer of lust, accompanied by a roar of affection and desire to feel each other’s touch. Their eyes met, green on blue, grounding themselves in the only thing that they could consider being stable in their lives: each other.

As their breaths evened and their hearts slowed down, Ethan cupped the side of her face delicately, smiling down at her pensively, memories of the horrid night at the hospital tormenting his mind.

“I can’t imagine never touching you again.” he muttered, his eyes shining with vulnerability. He traced the line of her spine, then pressed his palm between her shoulder blades, bringing her into a warm embrace. Her lips pressed against his neck, muffling her words.

“Let’s hope neither of us has to experience it. Ever again.” a shiver wrecked through her body at the mere thought of the trauma that followed her around to this day. It slowly became easier to cope with what she’s been through, but it would be a long time until she would be able to say that it’s behind her.

Ethan noticed the change in her posture, searching for her eyes urgently. They would tell him without a shadow of a doubt just how she was feeling. The nightmares she still had were clearly in the back of her mind, but the light was beginning to overwhelm the darkness.

“Are you okay?” he asked, returning his hand to her face and running his thumb over her cheekbone softly. Concern colored his voice, caring about her always being on the forefront of his mind and intentions. Claire stood on her tiptoes, brushing their lips together sweetly.

“I am now.”

Pressing the button again, they let the elevator carry them to the seventh floor. They gathered their things and stopped in the threshold of the office, looking over it for the last time before turning the lights off. Smiling somberly, they made their way towards the entrance.

Standing together in the middle of the atrium, they watched as the last patient left the hospital. It felt like an era was coming to an end, something monumental and groundbreaking. Ethan reached for her hand, tangling their fingers.

“I’m not ready to go yet.” Claire muttered, looking around the grand room they were in. As the last light died, the shadows became more pronounced, the space feeling bigger and scarier. Ethan hummed, sighing heavily.

“I’m not ready to go either. It’s eleven years of my life, ending like someone cut it off with a knife.” Looking away from the windows, he focused his eyes on her again. “What are you going to miss the most?”

“You.” she responded without a moment of hesitation, both of them giggling like a pair of fools a second later.

“Likewise, Claire.”

He wrapped his arm around her shoulder, pulling her into his arms for a tight hug. Pressing his lips to her forehead, he let his mind wander towards the future. The only thing he could see clearly was her. Smiling at him from her place on his couch. Smirking over her shoulder under the hot spray of water in his shower. Sighing his name as she straddled him in his bed. Their bed.

“We’re going to be okay.” Ethan reassured them both, and then they left the hospital for the last time. Together.

Notes

In my mind, it’s how it went down, and no amount of canon from PB can change that. My idiots, my headcanon.

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