#they don't care about maintaining a social contract with you they don't care about honouring your work with any kindness or reward | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

craycraybluejay · 5 months

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i hate everyone i hate life i hate fucking everything just fucking when is it over when do i get to see everyone else hurt like i hurt when do i get to my permanent holiday off this nightmare train.

#vent post #iwantagun.txt #no one gives a shit about me or you or anyone motivation culture is a scam that wants to eat your wallet #they want you to FUCK them or they want you to BE THEIR STRESS BALL or they want you to be a STATUS SYMBOL or anything anything at all but #a person with their own needs and feelings and pain #you give and you give and you take so much shit thinking you can change the cards you were played #you can't.#what's the point of playing at civility and turning the other cheek and sucking up when none of it does anything but make you feel pathetic #the people with any power in your life are almost always Not You and they often don't particularly care what you need or want #they don't care about maintaining a social contract with you they don't care about honouring your work with any kindness or reward #because as long as they SAY that what you're doing will get them to be good to you you will work that angle in the hope of good #and then they can just go back on it and entrench you deeper and deeper into servitude #until you realize theres no point to it and they throw you another bone so you lose your rationale again #no one repays their FUCKING debts. no one is charitable. to you it is your life to everyone it is just a game #this is NOT a game #i am not obligated to take anyones fucking shit!!! die!!!!#if i dont off myself before i get the chance i am putting every fucker who so much as looked at me wrong in hell #jail. in deep with organized crime. permanently sick. i dont care. i just want to know that they hurt and hurt and hurt till they die #i want them to be afraid. in agony. throw them those bones they threw me just to yank them away again and again #they have to pay. im never going to make it but all i wish for is to be just influential enough to do to them what they did to me tenfold #PLEASE come throw a good hard punch at me so I have a good excuse to beat your ass half to death #PLEASE break into my house so I can knock you over the head with a crowbar #PLEASE give me reason to finally get a little of that vengeance. of course you deserve it i know you did something like that to someone #i know you refused to help a friend when they were broke and homeless. i know you manipulated an ex into sex. i know you looked down on #someone that just needed help. i know you ignored your kid when they were sick. i know you did something.#I'm sick? violent? mad? sure. but YOU are the acceptable evil that builds that festering rage #you are the good bad thing that keeps the wheels turning and the lowest rung down where you agree they ought to be #you have it a long time coming

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