#thia doesn't make any sense to anyone but me

[hedwig221b]

I cannot stop thinking about how one of my wips feels like The Happiest of All on steroids (at least to me).

Full disclosure, the Rant is incoming (no spoilers). I just have to share this with someone and this is my blog damnit I do what I want.

I'm going to put Derek though an emotional grinder like goddamn. I'm going to have him shaking with tremulous hope but also have him on edge from everything Stiles is doing.

Stiles is going to face the reality of his actions and the truth about who he is and where he stands with it and what love will force him to do.

Stiles' big decision is going to be a lot more difficult for him to make than I thought. I'm writing him and with each page I'm like holy fuck this is going to be so painful for you, kitten.

THoA was, like, a little haha plot, a silly "what if". This motherfucker feels more complex. Lying on the bed and staring at the ceiling kind of complex. Sterek is still unhinged, obsessed and all that jazz, I can't write them any other way, but holy shit.

There's more smut. With Feelings. They're so horny.

It all started with an anonymous simple haha question. I hope you, anon, will read it when it's done and realise what kind of monster you've created.

[miochimochi]

The Self as a Whole: The Ego and its Rights

( Previous | Next )

Index

Back again with another piece of this series. Hopefully it's more structured than the last, but it was still written over a number of days, especially while I was tired in bed. Just like last time, no one's forcing you to read, but I would like to thank anyone who takes the time to.

The title of this series of writings being a nod to egoism is no coincidence. Egoism is a philosophy of the self. It has taken many roles throughout history from the epistomelogical to the political. A name you may recognize in relation to egoism is likely Max Stirner, of whom I have great respect for as a philosopher. I'm not an egoist myself, but there are a number of things that I agree with egoists on, one in particular being of import to this series.

Before discussing thia agreement, I first think it necessary to define the ego. The ego is the whole of oneself, what makes a man who he is. It's the collective knowledge he has acquired, his behaviors, his beliefs, his motivations. It's interchangeable with "the self". The exactness of the nature of the ego is up to debate, egoism taking its own position on that, but this is what the ego is. One's ego is inalienable, it is theirs alone and ends where they do. With that out of the way, let's discuss that which I do agree with egoists on.

Man is selfish - inherently so. Everything a man does is motivated by his own selfishness, to serve his own ego. This is a philosophical position known as psychological egoism. It posits that every human action is taken due to a perception of gain, whether consciously or unconsciously. This gain can come in many forms. The most obvious form is the material - this is where most people I speak to on the subject stop when they hear me speak of gain. But gain need not be material and indeed may even be sacrificial of the material. Spiritual, intellectual, moral, social, and emotional gain are also determinants of one's actions.

In whole, what this means is that altruism itself is a result of selfishness. There is no true altruism. All perceived altruism is really selfishness. Giving food to the needy is altruistic - one is sacrificing time, energy, and resources to do so. This isn't done with nothing being gained in return, however. The reason for the giving tells us what we need to know. "It's the right thing to do" tells us there is moral value and thus is serving the ego's sense of morality. "God tells us we should" tells us there is spiritual value and thus is serving the ego's sense of piety. "It makes me feel warm inside" tells us there is emotional value and thus is serving the ego's feelings. There is also the motivation that it will look good to do it (a motivation few would admit to publicly) and thus there is a social gain, the promise of raising one's social status within a group.

One might look at this and ask, "But what if someone doesn't see any gain? What if they get nothing in return? Would that not prove egoism wrong?" To that I would sigh and say to read again. A perception of gain need not be a conscious effort, nor does it need to see the gain as a guarantee. It's simply the possibility of gain that one's ego may see, a possibility great enough to act in the hopes of attaining that gain. If in the end they gain nothing, then that is not evidence of the lack of selfishness but rather evidence of a bad judgement call. The ego is still being served, even when not served effectively.

As a result of the ego and its judgements, we can gain an understanding of value. Value is simply the worth of an item as viewed by an individual within an exchange. One's value judgement of a product is subject to their personal wants, needs, and ability. When an exchange is made, it's because there is a gain viewed in making such a transaction. The labor theory of value posits that labor is the deciding factor of value, but I do not wholly agree with this. What I do agree with is that labor is taken into consideration, but for labor to be the deciding factor of value, labor itself must have intrinsic and calculable value. Short of having to log one's hours of labor with witnesses to confirm and then subtracting the hours of labor used to create a product, I do not see how this can be done.

An alternative to the labor theory of value is the subjective theory of value. The theory states that value is determined by the individuals involved at the moment of exchange. Both the buyer and the seller have different exchange values. The buyer has a cap on how much they are willing to give up in exchange, the seller has a minimum requirement they are willing to accept before giving up their product. When their exchange values align, there is a sale. Market value is determined by the general exchange tendencies in the market.

These values can be expressed as a number of stones traded for a cart. We'll start with exchange value. The buyer is willing to spend no more than 10 stones on the cart, the seller is unwilling to give up the cart for anything less than 8 stones. The buyer and seller could each offer a price anywhere between 8 and 10 stones to purchase the cart. If the buyer offers 7 stones, there's no deal, the seller will not part. If the seller asks for 11 stones, there's no deal, the buyer will not pay. The exchange value is thus between 8 and 10 stones. Market value simply takes the average exchange value and there you go.

Through statist intervention in the market, these values can be and have been manipulated through artificial means. For example, in the US, non-competes more often than not prevent the lowering of exchange values thus keeping market value higher than it otherwise would have been. Subsidies lower the market value of a particular product, but they also cause other products to increase in price due to pushing for overproduction of one product at the expense of producing another product. Bailouts and other State assistance for companies give less incentive to lower prices and protects them from the consequences of not serving their customers. But this all too is driven by man serving his ego - the power being readily available is tempting, even when that power is at the expense of others.

The greatest example of the subjectivity of value is through the so-called diamond-water "paradox" - aka the "paradox" of value. I scoff at the idea of this being a paradox, since a paradox is logically self-contradictory and thus cannot be given a definite answer. The "paradox" is as follows - although water holds more utility, diamonds have greater market value. This "paradox" appears as early as Plato and yet, knowing all we do, it's still considered a paradox. But I am here to say - it is not. There are no contradictions in the problem presented. Water may be more useful, but it's also more abundant. While the price of diamonds has been artificially raised through social engineering, it is still less abundant than water. Between the two, diamonds are simply sought after more than water.

But this is not always the case - the problem focuses solely on the market value, when on the individual level the needs and wants of the individual affects the momentary exchange value. Take two men for example. Man A is at the foot of a mountain with abundant glacial runoff all year round. Man B is lost in the Sahara desert, facing dessication as his canteen had run out the day before. The Merchant offers A one cup of water in exchange for a diamond. A can simply go to the runoff to get a cup of water without needing to give up his diamond. A laughs off the merchant, "You're a fool coming to a wellspring of water offering a tiny portion in exchange for what's more rarely seen." So the Merchant leaves A and in a flash appears before B with the same offer. B has no guarantee he will find water anytime soon, he risks death by dessication if he does not get any water. B agrees to the trade, "This diamond means less than my life, it's no good to me if I'm dead, while this cup of water can sustain my body longer that I may be able to procure more diamonds in the future."

Between A and B, their situations are entirely different. A has water in abundance, B has a dirth of water around him. A can afford to keep the diamond without risk to himself, B cannot afford to lose out on an opportunity for water. A does not value water more than his diamond, B does not value his diamond more than water. Subjective value is the answer to the supposed "paradox". There is no one universal market, there are just many markets divisible down to the smallest market - that being the exchange between two individuals. One's need is as important to determining value as any other aspect of value.

By now I've hopefully made my point on value and explained well enough where it comes from and what it means. But there is one other thing I wish to talk about, something I've seen egoists call a "spook" and yet ultimately agree with: rights. There have been many debates on the subject - people saying they don't exist, people saying they are derived from some social contract, people saying they are derived from some deity, and people saying they are inherent. I am of the last camp, although there are many other camps. Ayn Rand had come to the same conclusions as me through logic, but her and her Randians refused to call them rights. Egoists come to the same conclusions as me through philosophical consistency, though they as well refuse to call them rights. But I find the term - defined as a power one is entitled to - to be apt.

Rights can be understood and concluded through a logical process of questions and answers. Would you be okay with someone killing you without your consent? Would you be okay with someone having sex with you without your consent? Would you be okay with someone kicking you out of your home without your consent? You can continue this line of questioning and you'll find the limits of your rights - and those limits are defined by consent. The egoist says your ego ends where another begins, that you are to leave alone the ego of another. The same is with rights. Rights are inalienable from the self, so where you go so do your rights and thus your rights end where another person begins.

From this standard of consent I've come to understand rights. I have a right to speak freely, I don't have a right to steal the product of another man's labor. I have a right to bear arms, I don't have a right to murder another person. My rights are my own, they are inherent and inalienable to myself. The same is with yours. I serve my ego and leave you to serve yours. My entire politic is derived from the standards of consent, that my ego and yours are to respect the rights of each other. If one would wish to change my politic, they would have to convince me that it's fine to violate another's consent - an uphill battle, to be sure.

[jjk-biased]

FATE'S GAMES SPECIAL

*not canon or part of the storyline, sorry 😔✋🏽

smau masterlist

content that didn't make the cut:

— chapter 25 alt end:

𝗶𝗳 𝗱𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲𝗹 𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗻𝗲𝗱 𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗲 𝗮 𝗴𝗼𝗼𝗱 𝗯𝗿𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝗻𝗱

“Daniel Y/L/N,” you gritted out.

“Long time no see, sister.”

The fucking nerve of this guy to even have the face to meet you. He somehow still upheld a small smile, which made you more livid.

“Why are you here?”

“To make amends. Is that too bad?” He shrugged lightly, too casual for your liking.

This was the asshole that had caused you a lot of years of suffering. He was the reason you had to shed blood, sweat, and tears to simply finish your degree in college. He was the root of your problems, the cause of why you had trust issues.

Mainly, he was the reason why the only people you could call your family was the seven best friends who took you in.

“You lost that chance years ago, Daniel!”

You tried your best not to let the anger within you take the wheel. If it did, you were sure you had to leave Seoul with a case of murder stained in your records.

“I’m leaving,” You murmured, snatching Jungkook’s hand and storming off to God knows where.

He followed you wherever you went though. No matter how many turns you took, he was hot on your tail. It took so much in you not to break Jungkook’s hand from the frustration you felt.

“Just give me a chance to explain, sister,” He pleaded.

You finally heard the desperation leak in his tone. Giving up, though not letting your guard down, you allowed it. You gave him yet another chance to redeem himself.

With reluctance, Jungkook left you to talk to Daniel. After reading his last message and texting Hoseok, you closed your phone.

Let’s relive the years of anguish, you sarcastically cheered internally.

“Don’t call me sister. That title died with you three when you moved to America without even so much as telling me,” You breathed out, tears trying their best not to fall from your eyes.

Daniel visibly flinched at that jab. He was a shitty brother after all.

“I… I didn’t mean for it to happen…”

“What a shitty excuse. You didn’t mean for it to happen? What bullshit is that?”

“I never thought they’d take it too far,” He whispered, unable to keep eye contact with you. If he did, he would see how much pain he had caused you.

You chuckled rather sarcastically.

“Yet they did. And you never did anything, did you Dani?” You sneered, the nickname that left your mouth didn’t feel as warm as it did.

Growing up with a traditional family wasn’t something you both could escape from. Your parents had a love-less marriage, meant only to expand whatever business they had.

As first-born, Daniel was expected of a lot of things. Intelligence, charm, and any other business-related characteristic that should help them prosper. But he wasn’t any of those things. He didn’t take interest in the entire idea. Instead of stocks and investments, he wanted modelling. Instead of maths, he wanted fashion.

Neither your mother nor father were having it.

So while he was forced to sacrifice his childhood for your parents, you had the freedom to exercise yours.

He’d be gifted with various accountancy and business related textbooks and would watch as you played with your toys and dolls. He never had those.

Your parents didn’t pay mind to your hobbies. They didn’t mind that you often geeked out at every video game you loved. They were too focused on making Daniel the CEO he will be.

He was angry. He was envious.

But he would be lying if he said he didn’t love you.

You were an empath at heart and would often cheer him up when the pressure was too much. He could still remember when you discovered him breaking down after a certain scolding happened— you dropped everything to rush to his side and say “It’s okay, Dani. I’m here for you.”

The memory of the countless cupcakes you had attempted to make just to make him smile was still etched in his mind. They weren’t the best tasting cupcakes out there, but they were made by you. And it made everything okay.

However, every thread snaps when it reaches its breaking point.

He had reached his— his envy became far too strong than the care had for you.

It was supposed to be a light remark so their parents could give him some sort of leeway in life. But the anger rushed out of his mouth and he couldn’t stop the word-vomit from pouring out.

He watched your parents’ treatment change and had to witness you take the burnt for him. You were now the one they had criticized at every twitch of a finger. They suddenly turned against you, angry at how you “wasted” your life with videogames.

He regretted every single thing he had said.

Perhaps it’s too late now.

“I had no power over them, you know that,” he muttered, taking your silence after he had explained everything as a cue to speak.

“You know… I never really minded them moving to America. But even you left me, Dani,” you croaked out.

“I’m sorry.”

“I became broke when I entered college. I had to work different jobs and eventually stick with the career I have.”

“I’m sorry,” He whispered once again, hands clasped tightly.

“I had no one else to rely on for a few years until my friends showed up,” You sighed.

“I’m sorry.”

It seemed more like a mantra by now. While it wasn’t enough to compensate for each day you had to go by without anyone else, it eased your heart a little bit.

He had also mentioned that he was sent by his parents to fix whatever you two had for the sake of the company. Your fame would bring them benefits, they said. Your brother ignored whatever ulterior motive they had initially planned, and took this chance to finally own up to the shittiest fuck up he had done.

You were thankful for the honesty, sensing that he was true to his word.

“I can’t forgive you immediately, you know,” You reminded, fiddling your thumbs out of anxiety.

“I know. I don’t mind waiting.”

Your brother had finally returned to you.

Jungkook stood beside you as you two waved your brother goodbye. He insisted on holding your hand when you two bid Daniel adieu.

With a heavy sigh, you turned to Jungkook, who had been patiently waiting for you and Daniel to talk it out.

“I’m so—”

He cut you off by tightly engulfing you in his arms. Jungkook softly patted your head as he brought you closer with his other hand.

“I’m glad you’re okay, pumpkin,” Jungkook said ever so gently, resting his chin on your head.

Turning red at his gesture, you allowed yourself to melt in his arms and returned the hug by wrapping your arms around his waist.

“Thank you, kook. I can’t tell you that enough,” You murmured, feeling warm from his gentleness.

He had sadly broken up the hug soon after. It was the first time you’d seen his ears become red but you didn’t point it out.

Clearing his throat, he once again took your hand in his and led you to wherever the others were. He said you might get lost if he didn’t clutch one hand and it would be hard to find you because you were vertically inclined.

If everyone else heard his excuse, they’d definitely say Sure Jan.

You didn’t mind though, actually liking the feeling of his large hands encasing yours.

And if you did mind, you couldn’t actually speak. After all, Daniel decided to leave you with a few parting words that made you embarrassed and rattled.

“You seem to have a crush on your guard dog, N/N.”

Ah you should’ve smacked him when you had the chance. You? Have a crush on Him??? How ab...surd…

You honestly didn’t know anymore. But Jungkook’s hand in yours, you were certain that everything will now turn out fine.

Jungkook’s only problem now was how he’d be able to find the courage to say what he wanted to say earlier.

I like you, Y/N.

But he was content with whatever you two are now, your hands snugly fit with his.

*note: the reason i didn't chose this path is because it seems illogical. don't you think?

i mean,,, it won't be easy to forgive Daniel for what he had done,,, so i made him the bad guy ;-;) but it gets better in the end i swear!

also another reason was i really wasn't happy with how it turned out ;-;) seemed too rushed for them to make amends doesn't it?

this post is part of my special milestone event!

and another fate's game bonus is a q&a with the characters!! (but no one sent in asks throughout the week so it's still open) so if you have questions for the characters, send asks!!

taglist: @armymaknae @rjsmochii @chogiyeol-utopia @deolly @liitlefaiiery @patpus @br0ther-s @tyraparker @ancailinaerach @tae165 @cherrycolababie @nininek12 @atulipandarose @hannahdinse8 @hereforaus @thewariestofheads @thia-aep @diorhobii @seungcheoluwu @mipetronella @callmesenpaix @jungshookmeup @yoongisabby @parkchaeyoung1997 @alpaca1612 @bangtan-serendipity @karissassirak @fullsunkook @salty-for-suga @cholychi @smolbeaniejimin @netflix-batman-sleep @snickerdoodleeee @faeriegukkie @kpop4mysoul @crazylittlemay @theneighborhoodfangirl @ughtear @youurkryptonite @lovelyseomin @pureshinso @kawaiimusiccollection @aviwasabi21

permanent tag: @luvinseokjinnie @97faerie @amoreguk @bbyjoonies @borednia @tanumiki @taescake