#this doesnt apply to straight up bigotry if you compare it to any actual issues ill kill you

[junkartie]

the internet has genuinely rotted peoples brains. Yeah bitch some things are problematic if you view it under 7 different lenses and dissect them with a specific idea in mind but a lot of the time its literally not that deep. Everything is problematic if you try hard enough and it devalues actual real life issues

[marinasorter]

ok you know what? that whole spiel was honestly SO disrespectful i dont even know where to start.

well first off, you need to realize that racism is NOT about intent, its about the effect. imagine if i punched you, by accident, just because it was an accident does matter because now you have a bruise. the bruise was the effect of physical harm. the bruise doesnt disappear because it realizes that the offense was an accident and that the offender didn’t actually intend to leave a bruise on you. you got hurt, and because of a punch, and that’s that.

the same thing can be applied to racism, and any other kind of -isms out there, and any form of abuse (especially emotional/mental). katie called me a roach, and it doesn’t matter if she meant it in a harmful way either, because either way it is literally an act of racism AND colorism. and thanks for trusting urban dictionary dot com over a black girl telling you that ‘roach’ is in fact a racialized insult that has been used thousands and thousands of times against dark skinned black people (i even have the pictures to prove it!).

you’re literally calling a black person petty for being upset because i became a victim of racism. that is literally victim blaming. you just victim blamed me. you just told me to get over it and accept that someone just spewed an act of racism towards me. you would never say that to a victim of assault, or abuse, or cheating. you would never say “they didn’t mean to touch you there, they were drunk, so just accept that it was a mistake” to a victim of sexual harassment. you wouldn’t say “they didn’t mean to hit you with their car, so just accept that it was a mistake” or “they didn’t mean to call you out/fight you out in public, it just happened because of the timing, so just accept that it was a mistake.”

you wouldn’t say those stuff because you know shit like that can stressful and even traumatizing to whomever is facing it now. so what makes katie using a derogatory term on me any different? i was genuinely hurt and genuinely upset, and for you to straight up call me petty for that, is literally victim blaming . by you calling me petty is literally minimizing the extent of stress and hurt that i have experienced from being insulted by someone close to me. you say “katie is your friend” but you don’t realize that because katie is my friend literally made the act 10x more hurtful than any stranger could have done. you don’t expect the ones close to you to do something hurtful, so once they do the pain comes twice as hard.

we’ve already had a talk and you mentioned that we had similar believes whereas i disagreed. and honestly hannah, the disagreements we’ve had are on topics so heavy that i honestly don’t think i can handle carrying on a relationship who can’t see eye to eye with me. i’ve been thinking about this a LOT and i truly believe that cutting off our friendship is what’s best for us.

i’m willing to own up and apologize for freaking out on you earlier. it was 100% my fault because i totally misread your message and my ensued reaction was uncalled for and i apologize for putting you under all that stress for no reason.

but now i feel like our views are just so vastly different that i can’t see this friendship lasting very long. i definitely do not appreciate you calling me petty for reacting to a situation that is DEFINITELY NOT petty no matter which way one looks at it. and that was the breaking point.

i’m going to leave banter bus (after you respond to this) and possible sinvinteen because i also don’t believe that me and most/some of banter bus are on the same wavelength on certain topics, and that bothers me. it takes more than to just not be blatantly racist by using slurs, and waving flags or of the sorts, to well not be problematic. im not calling you guys horrible racists but unfortunately some of yall wont take the extra time to actually look into your actions and vocabulary and deconstruct any forms of slight bigotry or any sorts of -isms and figure out why y’all behave and say the things you do. and this has happened more than once with more than one of the gals in banter bus, but whenever i call you guys out on the things you say that might be problematic you guys kinda lock up n say “i didn’t mean it like that” but do yall take the time to figure out why you say/do it, if you didn’t mean it?

like with feesha and the holocaust/muslim thing. did she ever stop to wonder why the mass murder of millions of jewish people was the first thing she thought to compare with/to islamophobia?

or with marie (who actually took it fine im just using it as an example) did she ever stop to wonder WHY the french phrase “penis for a brain” was an acceptable phrase to use when talking about acts of infidelity when there are millions of trans women who already suffer the effects because of such cissexist language when they 100% do NOT have a penis for a brain, whatever that means.

and more. like yall get burdened when i call you guys out on such facts rather than taking the time to actually listen. like yall would rather just take part of the superficial issues of the world and think that thats good enough of you rather than going in dismantling problematic ideations inside you.

and to be honest, i need more friends who are the latter rather than the former. ://

i’m not going to do anything now, but i really need you to read this and think hard before shooting me a reply. but its pretty obvious that we are miles apart in how we go about handling such heavy topics so i can already assume the worst for your response.