#this entire convo is stupid race isnt a thing they are people they are a nomadic ethnic group w a history

[magnoliamyrrh]

thats why it hurts my brain too when ppl have intense ass arguments abt what race specific "hard to classify" groups are

the balkans are just one example of this bc weve been considered a bunch of shit throughout history and we exist in a weird position always but. there are So Many ethnic groups and regions of the world which are like this

and ppl will go on entire things with the upmost seriousness trying to "race" whatever ethnicity when its like....... dude do you not understand.... does the entire argument itself not make you see.... this is all made up and this conversation makes no damn sense bc there isnt actually any sort of biological basis that this shit is based on ,, ,,, race is Largely some bullshit made up for the sake of oppression and youre trying So Hard to shove ppl into it instead of understanding the complexities of the situation...why..... pls stop

[canaryatlaw]

Today was okay-ish. Not great really. I'm still just in a weird space, mentally. Still can't get my mind to stop racing. I did call my psychiatrist today but he wasn't in that office today, but they took a message and said they'd have him call me, and asked if I needed to be today, so I said I mean it's okay if it's tomorrow but today would be preferable. I didn't get a call back today. Sigh. And it's just that much more difficult now that I'm working 9-5 because when am I supposed to do things like call my psychiatrist or anyone else that is only open 9-5? When am I supposed to go to the doctor ffs? I have one appointment scheduled for late June at 8 am. I'm sure that's gonna go over well with my brain. Sigh. Now I'm getting worked up over this which is the last thing I wanted to do. I think I'm gonna go up to 4 mg of Xanax a day though. It's still within the threshold he said I could try to figure out. I just want to talk to him about it because this guy knows my brain better than probably even me and when something that used to work is no longer working it's not a good sign. I should move on now though. Alarm went off at 7 and I successfully convinced myself to get out of bed by 7:01. Got ready, poured my cocoa krispies and then looked at my milk and it had apparently curdled when the refrigerator does was stuck open for some reason when I got home yesterday. Great. At least I figured it out before I poured it onto my cereal. So I hurried around grabbing some oatmeal (one of the disposable cups) and some cinnamon toast eggos. Made the bus so that's good. I got to the office and went to go see my supervisor but she wasn't in her office, so I just went back to mine and started working on the stuff she gave me yesterday. Not that long after she showed up at my office and said she was gonna be taking a personal half day but would make sure I had enough work, and that she'd probably be going down to court at 10:30 if I wanted to join her so I said sure. Kept working until then, then went down to court and absolutely nothing interesting happened when I was hit by another one of my wow you're going to close your eyes every 3 seconds now and be incapable of keeping them open spells that I've been getting lately when I'm sitting still and focusing on one thing, and at some point after that started my supervisor came over and said it looked like all the cases were just getting dates so it wasn't gonna be interesting if I wanted to go back upstairs. I'm not sure if she saw that I was visibly falling asleep or not, lol, but I took the out. It was a little past 11 at this point and I think then was when I called my psychiatrist. Then I didn't really have any work to do so I closed my door and set my alarm for noon and took a nap. I woke up at like 11:45 so I was probably only "out" for like 30 minutes, which I figured I'll just work through my lunch to make up for so it'll be fine. I mean, power naps are a thing right? And as long as I get the work done it's not like anyone cares, so....not a big deal lol. So I then opened my office door and started conversing with the two ladies who have the offices across and next to mine. The offices are kind of set up mostly in these 3 pod systems, and this is the first time I'm actually in a full 3 pod, since first semester the office next to mine was empty and last semester I was just kind of off in a corner. So we talked as we worked and that was cool. One of the ladies gave me some DCP packets to do, which they seem to think is like the worst thing ever and kept apologizing for giving me such a boring assignment and I'm like.....dude, I spent an entire semester doing this basically. This is child's play lol bring on the packets I can do them all. So I did all 4 then reported back to her and expressed my concern about the investigation into the last one that was somewhat lacking (whenever an allegation gets unfounded on the grounds that "it's the kids word versus the foster parents word so I'm gonna believe the foster parent" the kill bill sirens start going off in my head). So that was good. She then asked if I wanted to do some trial prep for a TPR, so I spent the rest of the afternoon sorting through a rather large file to write up a timeline of services that mom and dads 1&2 did or did not do (no polygamy, just two different dads for two kids). It wasn't terribly thrilling but it was fine. I left right around 5 to catch the 5:13 train, which I'm gonna have to start leaving a little bit earlier for because the last two times it's been a few minutes early and I've barely made it (it's typical for me to get in anywhere between 8:50 and 9, so I figure 5 minutes here or there evens itself out). Trip home was fine, quickly threw some dinner together and tuned into the flash, most of my excitement stemming from knowing that watching this week's episode meant getting to next week's episode when my bby Len is coming back haha so more of a means to an end than anything else, but I actually really liked the episode! I definitely like, snorted when they showed that in wiping Barry's memories they screwed over Savitar too and now killer frost was like welp, gotta help them fix it lol. The scene with her and Cisco though, like stop it broke my heart so much <\3 like JUST LET CAITLIN BE HAPPY DAMMIT IT ISNT THAT HARD UGHHHH so that made me sad. The main part with Barry was pretty comical, him and Iris were adorable together even with the inevitable this isn't their reality looming over their heads. And they managed to get the probable cause hearing fairly by the book, so I didn't get too pissy over that (I mean, there's no way that would be the only possible way to keep the guy in custody and he would HAVE to be released otherwise, so that part was totally unrealistic, but I realize that was just a necessary plot point). But overall I really liked the episode and then of course the first shot of the preview had me flipping a shit immediately because LEN IS STANDING IN FRONT OF THE WAVERIDER and we already know he was wearing oculus clothing in other shots on the sizzle reel and ugh.......I really don't want to get my hopes up but I can't help it, they're already sky high. I really wouldn't be surprised if it's another fake out, though I would probably be the angriest I've been with them at this point. I guess we'll see where that goes. It took me about 6 minutes to remember that prison break comes on right after the flash (and by remember I mean going to the my shows list to watch B99 and see oh shit it's recording) but I caught up to live pretty quickly. I felt pretty distracted during this week's episode, probably just due to weird mental head space again. But I'm glad they're making progress and then they were like 3 episodes left!!! and I was like what????????? This is way too short lol. But I'm very much looking forward to that teased Michael/Sara reunion for next week because I know it's gonna be epic. Lol, at the end of the episode they're like "Michaels dying!" and I was like lol, when is Michael Scofield not dying? Also, at this point I'm just convinced Michael doesn't know how to give up on anything so he just keeps trying crazier and crazier ideas until one of them inevitably and inexplicably works. But I am enjoying that. So after that, I did watch Brooklyn 99. I may be totally wrong on this, but I could've sworn B99 used to be a half hour show??? I'm probably just wrong but I definitely thought that. This episode at least seemed very distinctly split into two parts, both of which were pretty great. The Rochester partying was hilarious of course as was them recreating what happened. Then there was the whole Amy/Jake storyline with her taking the sergeants exam that led to that super sweet scene of him just being like this is your dream and it's been your dream before we started going out, I've always known you were gonna be my boss anyway and it was really adorable (and then he went all die hard and it was really funny). And yeah, that pretty much capped my tv for the night. I got into a Twitter DM convo with one of the DCTV podcast hosts (I'm being intentionally vague here) regarding the appearance of the waverider in the trailer and they weren't happy about it and was just kind of ranting at legends and normally we just have stupid and amusing conversations about our shows so it got kind of awkward for a minute there but we both calmed down and were like okay it's fine people have opinions lol. And plus they have an entire podcast to rant to about their opinions, so the need to do it to me personally isn't really there. We're fine though, I like them and I enjoy talking to them. And that was pretty much my day. Tomorrow is Wednesday and my third day at "work" for summer. Did I mention I'm the only law clerk in the office right now? My name looks so lonely on the sign in sheet, lol. Most people are still in finals, I just finished really early and wanted to make sure I made it back in time for the child death case to be up so here I am. I'm probably the only law clerk in the building at this point 😂 but yeah, as far as I know I'll finally be going iron the field (maybe I should pack a change of clothes? We didn't discuss this) or maybe she's coming to the courthouse but I'll be interviewing a 5 year old girl who was removed from her mother's care about 2 weeks ago after reports of physical abuse and that mom was a heroin addict with visible track marks on her arm, and she was always referring to her daughter as "that little bitch" and like throwing her around, and also they were living in like complete desolation, like there were holes in the floor and no heat (and this is Chicago and even though ITS FUCKING MAY it's still been freezing) and many other such examples and yeah, it wasn't good. The DCP investigator seemed to think the girl appeared as a normal happy, healthy 5 year old so that's encouraging. I guess we'll see how that goes. Okay, time for bed now. Goodnight punks. Stay awesome.