#this is supposed to be friendly banter why dont you HAVE EMOTION

[jackie-shitposts]

CRIKEY! Ahstraliah's one BEEEEEEG country!

[image description: A screenshot taken from the Netflix reboot of Carmen Sandiego. An overhead view of player in his room. He is smiling at his computer monitors in front of him. His hands hover over the keyboard. /End description]

Player says he was practicing because he wanted to "brush up on carmen's location" but i think it would be funnier if he was making fun of gray lmao

iconic player never change

[delusion-of-negation]

U weren’t talking ab lower-middle class ppl in ur post right? I’m wondering bc sometimes ppl use middle class in a broad way and don’t really know ab life for lower-mid class ppl. For instance that’s what my family was considered but we went without adequate food sometimes, no heat, not much clothing (I had to oftentimes borrow clothes from my friends) and had to sleep on a mattress with springs poking out. Not trying to attack u or anything and if ur aware of this I’m sorry if I sound preachy

I wasn't actually talking about anyone, it was intentionally nonsensical. Like... I said that if you feed a middle/upper class person grass then they're friendly, but if you stumble upon a herd then they trample you with their hooves. I've known plenty of people of various classes, and I've yet to meet a satyr when I'm not on mushrooms. The interpretation of it being about feeling lonely in a crowd that you don't belong to is probably closest to the emotions that I had at the time of making it, but to be honest my biggest emotion at the time was "I saw some cows the other day and they were adorable". It wasn't supposed to mean anything, it was just a bunch of words.

Obviously I have met wealthy/ish people who are also dicks - I mentioned the dickish actions of one in a comment (wouldn't go to a support group because people she heard talking about it looked poor). But I've met plenty of people who are dicks, and it's not exclusive to the rich/decently well-off (although, being a dick to people because you perceive someone as having less money than you does tend to increase proportionally to financial status, for obvious reasons). I guess that could also be seen as an element of the joke but... that's probably giving me too much credit, since I barely thought it through at all.

To be really candid for a moment, one of my friends was very wealthy - he was also beautiful, funny, painfully disconnected in an endearing way, etc. As a teenager, my self-worth was so low that I assumed that everybody would rather spend their time with people other than me - I was in constant competition for people's affection against friend groups that I'd imagined they had, and in some cases I didn't bother competing against those imaginary people, I figured people would be happier with them. My friend died. Sometimes I torture myself looking at his pictures and wondering if those rich friends I assumed he had were there for him.

I know that seems like a tangent, but it's a huge part of my journey from judgemental and insensitive teenager to an adult who'll put preconceptions aside. I don't care how much money somebody has. You can have a couple million in your bank account and still feel like nobody would notice if you just disappeared. I don't strive to alienate people based on abstract categorisations, I strive to make people laugh and to me nothing is too sacred to be laughed about, because ultimately life is stupid and ridiculous and lonely... and all of that is funny if you word it right.

That said, in the UK class isn't typically presumed based upon income - it's cultural things like the insistence on looking "proper" and polite, it's social behaviours, it's a sheltered upbringing, it's the area you live, it's often informed by your finances but it's more than that... it's very commonly this manner of looking down upon the working class as disgusting and uneducated. Finances are on a scale, you can't split them into three groups (upper, middle, lower/working) and not have blurry areas at the divides. The sorts of outlooks and cultures that are usually being talked about are connected to finances but are more discernable groups.

I don't really want to talk about my spells of homelessness, my health issues, the dangerous areas I lived in, the poverty I lived in, the drugs, etc, because I never like playing the "my pain is worse than someone else's pain" game, and as I've said... I don't think that rich people are even immune from being in pain, so obviously I don't think that lower middle class people have some idyllic life either. Ultimately everyone's life sucks in some way, and we probably would all have more in common than different if we ever stopped judging each other by perceived group and instead listened without competing.

I genuinely hope that you don't feel targeted by my jokes... the point isn't to make people feel bad, it's to have a laugh. Like I said, nothing is too sacred for some good old banter.

But I hope that, after reading this, you get why it is so ridiculous that people assumed that I hated a whole demographic and was calling them animals as an insult. I've already explained my sense of humour in another post: https://zombie-twink.tumblr.com/post/190575804198/i-dont-know-how-many-times-i-have-to-tell-people and in the post you're talking about I've already argued against the idea that it was born of hatred or judgement: https://zombie-twink.tumblr.com/post/190576276838/zombie-twink-mr-downer and the edgy asshole thing is pretty clearly an act, I'm actually a broken and lonely individual just like everybody else.

PS. You don't sound preachy, and you should never feel like you have to apologise for asking questions.

[phil-and-a-corgi]

highschool bandfic in a nutshell - chapter 2

chapter 1

rating: t/m (swearing and also irene’s writing.)

word count: um i dont know a lot ( 2083 )

summary: uhh we have that on the first page

here if you want to read it here then here you go materinos(doesn’t include behind the scenes bants though

here read it on google docs yeah i know so professional(this one has behind the scenes banter)

SECOND CHAPTER (2)

(written by renee @dan-and-a-shibe - pete’s pov)

after finally putting on my eyeliner (i had no time to do it this morning and i looked like a garbage can filled with shit on fire) i hopped off the sink counter. sighing and putting my MAC charcoal liner back into my bag.i dabbed just a wee bit of eyeshadow because WHY THE FUCK NOT. the bell rang, signalling that i was late for first period. why do i let a bell, a mere beep for 5 seconds control where i go and when i go. it just shows how even though everyone tries to be themselves that everyone ends up being dragged by the trends of society. so i decided to sit in the background and look through tumblr. on my phone. ten minutes of scrolling through poetry and kittens. i should get going now. so i did. i walked into mr armstrong’s class.

“mr wentz may i ask why you’re late.” he asked, jokingly in a teacher’s voice. “sorry it’s required to ask that” he whispered, winking at the class.

“i know why, because he was busy being a GAYLORD”(dh quote) that try hard kid justin bieber teased.

“ok justin please explain how your bleached hair isn’t gayer than his amazing eyeliner.” mr amstrong retorted back as the whole class “oohed” at justin.

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(written by Irene - @feckboy69-aol - frank’s pov)

Fuck Ms. O-Conner. Fuck her class. It's the only class that I don't have with my beloved Gee and the rest of the guys I hung out with and the only class where the teacher actually expects me to do shit. Like okay, maybe there’s some nice chicks in this class and I sit in the back next to a window where I can stare out of and think of my beloved, beautiful Gee, but so what? Lorde’s (yeah, that's what her preferred name was, what a joke) a fucking bore. Honestly, so would this school be, if not for my beloved, precious, beautiful Gee and the shit going on with Ryan and Beebs’ tea drama. Oh, that and the whole of Beaver’s crowd; it was fun watching them get owned by literally everyone here.

Anyway, English class. Lorde Bitchface was screaming about the importance of “putting emotion into your poems” and using “meaningful symbolism” to give your writing “depth” like the edgy bitch she was, so I just tuned her ugly mug out as usual, grabbing my notebook and turning to a fresh page. I gripped the #2 mechanical pencil in my hands and let my mind wander and think about my beloved, adorable, precious, and beautiful Gee, which wasn't very hard. I thought about the last time we had made out (in the bathroom near Bitchface’s class in the stall that no one used) and let my hand draw what I thought. I never was a good artist, but my beloved, handsome, adorable, precious, and beautiful Gee had taught me a couple things (some about art, some about other things), so I had become pretty good. I concentrated for a good 5-7 minutes on the drawing, making every line count, and then smirked to myself at the finished masterpiece. It was stunning; well Gee was.

“Ah… Mr. Iero, why don't you tell us?” said Lorde Bitchface, looking at me with that stupid fucking teacher look that Mr. Armstrong had copied perfectly from her and would use to joke around. But I, being me, tried to pass it off with a smartass answer, something I always did that got on the bitch’s nerves.

“See now I would, but I don't do things like that for free,” I said, giving her a mischievous look. Several girls in front of me (except Hayley, that sassy lassy, who just rolled her eyes and went back the crap that Bitchface was teaching) turned around and giggled, playing with their hair in a vain attempt to try and get my attention. They knew about Gee and me; the whole school did (that's a story for another time), but they still thought they could get me. But I played along anyway, winking at them and giving them the Frank Iero Famous smoulder. The girls seemed impressed, but Bitchface clearly wasn't, her ugly face (okay, I knew she wasn't ugly, she probably got a lot of action actually with that figure, but I despised her so fuck off) morphing into one of disgusting bitch anger, her nose and eyebrows scrunched up and her lips pursed into a tight, white line. I knew she was about to blow, when a kid sitting all the way up in the front who I didn't even know existed until he spoke his next words (that would definitely be his last if I ever found him alone in a dark hallway, by the way) said, “He's being inappropriate and drawing repulsing images in his notebook, Ms. Lorde. I saw him when I went to sharpen my pencil, Ms. Lorde,”

He then turned around and smirked at me, his wavy ginger hair following him as he did, an aura of smugness about him that I did not appreciate.

I saw the anger drain from Lorde Bitchface’s face and have it replaced with a look of calmness that was actually more efficient in scaring people than her anger.

Fucking asshole, I thought, momentarily losing my cool before reminding myself that I was Frank Iero and bitches wished they could kiss the ground I walked on with their crusty-ass, chapped as fuck lips.

So when that fucking whore of a teacher gave me detention, I simply smiled and said a cheeky, “Can't get enough of me as it is, Lorde? Not that I can't see why you wouldn't want more of this,” running my hands through my hair, knowing that this was definitely gonna make the ugly hag throw a fit, which would be far more amusing than if I had just accepted the offer of yet another detention.

It worked; I got sent to the principal's office, but like hell I was actually gonna go there. I smiled to myself as I walked outside the door, giving Bitchface a cheeky salute as I went out, not staying long enough for her to scream more shit at me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(written by renee @dan-and-a-shibe - ray’s pov)

geez well this is frank's seventh detention this week and it's only wednesday. how is that even possible. well, lorde's most recent detention got him a saturday detention for the whole day and i knew he was supposed to go hang out with gee. gerard would be heartbroken if he couldn't make it to their next date. they have date night in saturday. i had to convince lorde to get him out of detention. she hadn't hated me yet, so i had a chance. while we were supposed to be writing deep poetry, i went up to her desk.

                 “hey um, ms lorde, uh sorry about frank. his family isn't really okay at the moment, and well, he's been acting up. more than usual. his parents have been really hard on him, especially with the detentions. i hope you can withdraw the multiple detentions from the past three days. don't mention this to him, or anyone else. please.” truth was that franks family wasn't doing to well but they weren't being hard on him, they didn't care anymore.

          lorde paused for a moment. “ok then, ill withdraw the detentions. only for this week. why don't you go down to the office and tell him this detentions are withdrawn.” i knew i could do it. most ladies have more vulnerable emotions, they’re more sensitive. and that's why women are so great. and now he only had three after school detentions..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(written by Irene - @feckboy69-aol - tyler’s pov)

It was lunch for the Sophomores, so as usual, I was trying to find my best fren Josh Dun. It was strange, he wasn't anywhere to be seen, when usually I could spot his vibrant colored hair in any crowd (it was a bright yellow today). So when I entered the large circular shaped cafeteria, and didn't see him, I started to panic a bit.

He was there in the morning, we walked here together, he was there in first period, I saw him when I went to go to the bathroom, he was there during third period because I was there with him, oh no, he got kidnaped… he got bullied he's in a locker somewhere stuck I have to go, he's hurt I have to sav-

“Tyler!” I heard someone scream from behind me, interrupting my very important thoughts about Jishwa. I turned around in pure panic, ready for the news that was going to be solemnly sorrowful; news about Jishwa’s untimely death.

Alas, it was only Jenna Joseph Black, a pleasant surprise at that. I smiled in spite of my internal mental struggle, watching Jenna smiling and running up to me. The cafeteria was now starting to fill up, with cliques of people banding together in their own respectable tables, as usual.

Jenna grinned at me, giving me a friendly greeting. I didn't want her to get worried for my stupid overthinking habit. She wrapped her arm around my shoulder, leading me to our lunch table which consisted of me, Jish, her, Hayley (Kiyoko) Adam, Jack, and Ryan. The others weren't there yet, me and Jen usually arrived early, Josh not too far behind us, with the rest walking together, usually bringing some mundane news about whatever they considered important in their lives. Usual conversations involved Jack and his frens coming in with their loud but awkward selves, Hayley not too far behind them, her hands crossed in silent disapprovement at almost everyone and everything. They all would then come in to our table, interrupting the meaningful conversations that Jen, Jish and I would be having, usually conversations about the possibility (or plausibility) of whether coconut sharks could or not exist, (if they did exist, where would they be swimming?) with talk about the latest song from so-and-so’s band or whether Ryan and Brendon would ever get back together, or at least make up.

But that's not what exactly happened today because Jen, ever the one to notice and care, gave me a caring concerned look that depicted exactly how much she cared and was concerned about me and Jish, her eyes gleaming in the bright-lighted cafeteria, her mouth morphing into a depressing frown.

“Where's Jish?” She inquired, the proportions of her face perfectly in line, to the point where she made everyday curiosity look like it was the epitome of perfection, suddenly standing up, probably (or plausibly) realizing that if Jish were here, he would be right now.

I slouched further into my seat, gulping, my throat feeling dry, “I don't Jen… I don't know…”  

[kilmameri]

I saw @solange-lol doing this and it seemed fun so I wanted to do it too. Please do it yourselves too and tag me to it if you like, I won’t be tagging anyone. I’ve added my comments in chunks so theyre easier to delete. this is mostly me writing random garbage which isnt needed but i wanted to do

Rules: bold the statements that apply to you, italicize your aspirations

AIR: i have small hands • i love the night sky • i watch small animals and birds when i pass them by • i drink herbal tea • i wake to see dawn • the smell of dust is comforting • i’m valued for being wise • i prefer books to music • i meditate • i find joy in learning new truths from the world around me

What kinda aspiration is having small hands tho? :DD I love the night sky the most when it’s warm an dark, often when im like, on a trip. its not often both dark and warm where i live :D and i Love birds. today waiting for the bus i almost forgot where i was when i watched birds fly in flocks over us. theyre moving back here for spring! :D

also like,, waking early is so over appreciated. and i see the dawn plenty bc the sun rises at like nine o’clock in winter if at all like,,, i get that its more constant to ppl who live closer to the equator and actually means something. i would wake up to see the dawn tho for the stillness of the world tho if it was with someone but only in daydreams bc why get up early when u can stay up late? that last one abt truths like lmao we get it u deep but yea i love trivia

FIRE: i don’t have straight hair • i like to wear ripped jeans • i play an organized sport • i love dogs • i am not afraid of adventure • i love to talk to strangers • i always try new foods • i enjoy road trips • summer is my favorite season • my radio is always playing

i love curly hair. i have really thick and stiff straigh af hair and i sometimes wish it had Even Waves bc id love to look more messy-cute ya know? bc now its all clean partings, no stray hairs. it looks too formal for my taste and id like for it to have some personality. i know i could just curl it with an iron or get it done but yea,,, i dont care That much

like im constantly told im crazy brave and i guess this applies to me? like i Did move at age 16 to my own in a city i have never been in with no one there who knew me and just,,, didnt even care. i tell others what ive been up to and they ooh and aah and im like?? but yea it does feel nice to be considered adventurous

also i love weird foods and am Not picky. in ninth grade home ec my kitchen needed to design a three course meal and dear fucking god was that a mess. we had one vegetarian lactose intolerant peep, one who didnt eat random shit like onions and bell pepper bc they taste bad (???) and so if a recepie had even a slightest bit of that he insisted it be left out or didnt even listen to the full recepie. and one who like,,,, would Not eat any foregin food. he wanted Potatoes and sausages. im like??? this is the final home ec test? this is supposed to showcase our skills,,, and you want boiled potatoes and plain sausage? what a mess lmao

WATER: i wear bracelets on my wrists • i love the bustle of the city • i have more than one set of piercings • i read poetry • i love the sound of a thunderstorm • i want to travel the world • i sleep past midday most days • i love dimly lit diners and fluorescent signs • i rewatch kids’ shows out of nostalgia • i see emotions in colors not words

i moved to a city abt uhhh? half a year ago and i love it here :D theres nothing better than walking in the centrum with the pidgeons and street artists and ppl having a good time chatting and shopping

i used to sleep past midday but i try to not so much bc that worsens my mood a lot bc i feel really isolated spending so much of my time alone. but it is my natural way of being so i guess thats how it be sometimes

EARTH: i wear glasses/contacts • i enjoy doing the laundry • i am a vegetarian • i have an excellent sense of time • my humor is very cheerful • i am a valued adviser to my friends • i believe in true love • i love the chill of mountain air • i’m always listening to music • i am highly trusted by the people in my life

bad eyesight ://. i do kinda enjoy doing household chores when i have something to listen to or a call to be in but that hasnt been the case lately. i am not vegetarian but sometimes i do go days without eating meat by accident which i dont mind but like,,, yea. its bc i eat like, bread, noodles, cereal, and then there might be something vegetarian at school that i eat bc it looks like the tastiest food there

idk abt my humor? its kinda spicky, insulting to some. but i dont mean it its like friendly banter. but i put it on with ppl who arent friends of confy with that sometimes and i dont mean to honestly

AETHER: i go without makeup in my daily life • i make my own artwork • i keep on track of my tasks and time • i always know true north • i see beauty in everything • i can always smell flowers • i smile at everyone i pass by • i always fear history repeating itself • i have recovered from a mental disorder • i can love unconditionally

never really liked makeup, too much work for a thing i cant really tell is even there. the flashy types of makeup i dont like so much. also im already cute af

ive been told im organized as hell by my peers and i dont get it. thats just?? how i naturally do things. it like,,, is Impossible for me to put things in their wrong places. if its hard to put where it belongs then i dedicate a “pending” spot for it in a place thats easy. and i hate notebooks and instead use a binder filled with loose leaves that i can edit as much as i like :3

thanks for reading, hmu if u wanna say something abt the things i wrote. ill read it

[shooshopath]

Finished MEA

THE GOOD THE CC. yeah yeah there’ve been like 5000000 complaints about it and like 60% of them are valid but also I can actually make an East Asian Ryder. Like it took 6 games but bioware finally got there LET ME HAVE THIS BEFORE DA4 TAKES IT AWAY BECAUSE APPARENTLY EAST ASIAN PEOPLE DONT EXIST IN THEDAS. VETRA. light of my life. My moon and stars. So tall. So kind. She’s just-so good. Like she keeps a literal crate of cereal in her room how was I supposed to not romance her. Honestly I really liked almost all of the tempest crew, barring Cora who…I don’t dislike, I just wish she’d talk about something besides asari. But I really think her story of self doubt has a lot of potential if it’s done correctly. GAMEPLAY. Fighting in this game is so fun! I’m not a fan of the profile set up but combat in general is so much more fluid and dynamic without being too frustrating. I do wish the guns did more damage but I was also admittedly playing on hardcore. Yes that was a humblebrag let me have this. In general my melee weapon did a lot more damage than any of my firearms which I guess is fine, though it did get a little boring constantly going pull-charge-melee on everything. THE SIDEQUESTS. I made it a point to only do the ones that sounded interesting but honestly they’re so much better than DAI’s. KADARA was probably the best part of the game for me. Fun plot line, interesting lore, not having to crawl inside the nomad every five minutes so I don’t die. THE BEST. THE NOMAD is so much better than the mako. I feel regret for every time I ever insulted the nomad on Eos because I can actually turn with it and that’s a feeling I never thought I’d get to experience with a vehicle in mass effect. THE ANIMATION. yeah yeah it’s weirdly jerky and a lot of the faces are cringey but after the patch it still looks better than any of the other mass effect games sorry not sorry THE FINAL QUEST. Actually really enjoyed the final charge. It kind of feels like what me3 should have been, in that all the allies you made throughout the game actually show up to help you and be your meatshields in combat. Also twin angst feels. LOYALTY MISSIONS. good shit.

THE MEH LIAM is not meh. Liam is an angel. But I feel like the people who wrote his loyalty mission/convos with ryder and the people who wrote his banter with other squadmates were on two completely different pages. It feels like he’s presented as friendly, open, and willing to break the rules to do what’s right, but then I’m in the nomad and half the convos between him and other squadmates have him with a stick up his ass and acting like a by the book cop. Which we were told that he quit BECAUSE he wasn’t like that. But whatever. THE ANGARA are ok. Though the game keeps on telling me they’re open with their emotions and I…did not see that. Like crying because you found out your mortal enemy is a zombified version of your race or being angry that a bunch of aliens are suddenly all up in your grill seem pretty reasonable to me. I enjoyed the moshae, it’s nice having a character who is firmly confident in her beliefs. VANGUARD. is so broken. 90% of the time I loved the combat and I’m either at full barriers all the time ripping turrets apart with my sword or I’m dead because the kett two feet in front of me is apparently an Invalid Target and I can’t charge them. Unrelated but I feel like vanguard mains are equivalent to dog owners in that we can’t and won’t shut up about how vanguard is the best class even if you’re talking about any other class. It’s Me. I’m guilty of this. ASARI FACES are all the same and a lot of people have complained about this but it’s actually true for all the of the original games as well, they just hid it better through lots of variations in makeup, skin tone and facial markings. It seems like a combination of the graphics being so much better and way less variation in terms of makeup/tattoos just made it incredibly blatant. SAM is…SAM’s ok, they just seem way too overpowered and I still don’t really understand what about them specifically makes them able to control the remnant besides Alec Ryder being Just That Good Of A Programmer. I like that SAM grows along with Ryder and you can see that as the game progresses (especially that Convo with your sibling near the end, that was Good), they just need to set some limitations on what they’re capable of because right now 80% of the quests are just “wave SAM at the thing to do the thing.” REYES VS SLOANE. Out of context I really enjoyed this plot line and Kadara, but…man, pitting the only prominent black woman in the game against one of only two mlm romance options and forcing you to choose between them is. Not great. Also, it feels like they were definitely pushing for the player to go with reyes-you get more chances to know and interact with him, and the game’s a lot more blatant about how evil sloane is compared to him when in actuality they’re both very morally grey. Also, if you’re playing a gay Ryder and you’re uncomfortable with letting sloane die you’re fucked either way since it’s either let that happen or not have the chance to finish the romance path of one of only two options (and if you’re not interested in the baby plot, really the only option). Also I loved Reyes he is a great character but please for the love of god hire someone who is actually latino to voice him because right now all I hear is default white mhawke trying and failing to do a sexy accent to impress his LI.

THE NONSENSE THE ORB BOSS KETT THINGS are stupid. HAINLY ABRHAMS aka we fucked up writing a trans character so we’ve just decided to remove any reference of her being trans at all to make up for it. Bioware, progressive bastion of the video game industry. JILL is exactly as bad as you would expect and I hope to god they just remove her from the game completely. FANDOM. yes yes it’s unrelated to the game but I’ve already seen like five posts whitewashing Reyes and another five turning him into a goddamn stereotype and I. I am so tired. THE KETT are so boring. I’m sorry they just. They just are. Also the Archon talks about genetic perfection yet his head is literally??? A horn circle??? There’s literally no plausible reason I can think of for why a species obsessed with being the strongest would use its resources and considerable scientific knowledge to grow a kett who has the equivalent of a Christmas ornament hanger on his head, in fact I’d argue it’s actually a detriment, like every time I see it I just want to yank. Also how would that even grow?? I’m assuming it acts similar to how horn growth occurs in mammals so how do the two horns eventually converge into one, and why would you want them to converge when having horns is already way more useful than a stupid halo that’s just begging for someone to loop a rope through and use him as a door knocker. Like the only feasible reason for why it exists is for target practice? Like some Kett hazing ritual, haha shoot through the horncle for 50 points it’ll be fine I swear come on man oh no oh fuck oh shit run. It’s so useless and serves absolutely no purpose yet some important kett scientist knowingly made this aesthetic choice. None of the other Kett leaders have it so why???! Does it exist????? I can’t take him seriously every time I see him and his deep ominous voice and his baby face I just can’t get past the horncle it destroys the tension why did whoever was in charge of character design let this happen goddamnit