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interesting lore moment with the francophone yesterday (as in, it personally gave me brainworms) ft. qétoiles’ horrible, no good, stupid (lack of) self-preservation . subs in English, transcript below the cut
All spoken in French — translated into English subtitles
[Video transcript:
Etoiles: And, actually, I have a theory. Basically what happened is that I’ve just returned from a mission from Cucurucho.
Antoine: And what was the mission?
Etoiles: To do a dungeon, and to recover something from the dungeon.
Antoine: And what was this “something”?
Etoiles: And the “something” was a book that sorta says that I’m a test subject.
Antoine: A test subject?!
Baghera: What’s up with your arm? You’ve got a coded arm.
Etoiles: Uh, it’s from holding the shield, basically.
Baghera: Ahhh
(Pause)
Antoine: Watch out that it doesn’t contaminate you, or else you’ll turn into a code, man.
Etoiles: That’s impossible, man, I can’t be a code.
Antoine: That’s what the old codes said before becoming codes, you know.
Etoiles: No— well, we’ve never spoken.
Baghera: Maybe you shouldn’t be using the shield as much then, no?
Etoiles: Well, as it stands, I’ve been using it for a really long time, and my mind is still healthy, honestly. And the proof is—
Baghera: Well, half of his face took the brunt of it instead.
Etoiles: Yeah, but it’s not all there is, you know.
(Pause)
Baghera: Let me worry, Etoiles, right now.
Etoiles: You’re right. You’re right! But everything’s going well, I’m doing very, very well—
Antoine: It’s true that you look a bit sick.
Etoiles: Uh, yeah, for the past seven years, it’s a chronic illness, it happened—
Antoine: No, but not this one, the other— you seem even sicker, still.
Etoiles: Yeah, okay. Yeah but no, I’m fine. No, no, it’s fine, honestly.
End Video Transcript.]
#qsmp#etoiles#baghera jones#antoine daniel#étoiles#here’s a game see if u can spot the colour coded subtitle i fucked up#sorry if the editing is bad im trying my Best .#jay rambles#jay clips#ccetoiles going ‘hey it could be fun if i played a code’ looms ominously in the background#also shoutout to people who often do translations like these fr fr#this one wasn’t too hard 4 me (fluent in both langs) but it can be difficult to translate#the implicit meanings in certain sayings between languages#i took the liberty of translating the little affirmative ‘quoi’s at the end of sentences#as ‘honestly’s and ‘you know’s since there’s no real equivalent#21/09/2023
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Week 8: The Best Two Months
Hello Family and Friends!
It's unreal. The time has come where each passing day is the last of its kind here in the United States for the next couple years of my life. I was always really good at taking long breaks from America, I've flown over the Atlantic more times than I can remember (thanks dad!). But this time it's for the most special purpose. I've found it to be the greatest privilege to represent Jesus Christ and His restored gospel here in these latter-days. How easy it is to gloss over all that has been given. Being here at the MTC has been a truly humbling experience. I've come to the realization that some opportunities are only as great as I allow them to be. It can be really easy to go through the motions, be content with not understanding, and let the time slip like grains of sand in between my fingers. I'd like to share how glorious of a week it has been for me, and perhaps you too will come to see the patterns that enabled it to be.
It began with the Sabbath day. It dawned on me that this next week would be my last, that this exposition to my missionary story would be coming to a close. In this moment, I decided that I needed to rely completely on the Lord if I was to be sufficiently prepared to enter Finland. I dedicated this Sunday to praying and directing my thoughts towards Christ and His love and atonement for me. I refrained from studying flashcards, and instead spent every spare moment praying and pondering. It was difficult, to be honest. Sometimes it feels like anything other than studying or practicing Finnish is an inefficient use of time, but I tried extra hard today to keep the Sabbath day centered on Holy things. I asked for the God to show his hand in my life, on the basis that I would exercise faith and trust in Him. The following 4 days proved to be wonderful.
I'll use some quotes to give the in-the-moment perspective.
July 30th, Monday night at 22:00 I wrote:
"Wonderful Monday today!! Felt the blessings of the gift of tongues for sure...I am so excited to be fluent!! The joy of missionary work will be fully realized when I can confidently speak. Time to study!"
July 31st, Tuesday night at 22:15 I wrote:
"Wonderful day today, can really feel the blessings in my life since I prayed for this week last Sunday. Language study went very well, class, lessons; everything went well. The devotional was really inspiring today, particularly because of choir. We sang "Hurrah for Israel", and the conductor, Brother Eggett, gave some very inspiring and amazing lessons about the value of the message of this restored gospel of Jesus Christ, and the value of missionary work".
August 1st, Wednesday night at 22:00 I wrote:
"Happy August! Today was definitely a bipolar day. Started off really exciting because we got to host new missionaries!..But first class was a bit rough for me because I embarrassed myself during our lesson, but I was able to recover well later that day. The old Finnish Mission President, President Watson, talked to us, and it was so cool! Really enjoyed hearing all about Finland. Second class went very well, funny how the days always end well :)"
August 2nd, Thursday at 14:08 my thoughts and feelings are as follows:
Having been closed all of July, today was the first time in a month the Provo Temple has been open, and what a gift it was to be able to attend the temple one last time before leaving for the field. I felt a special peace today. I pondered questions and gave sincere and personal prayer to my Heavenly Father and felt the love and care of my God encircle me like a ring of fire. I was able to receive a special witness through the power of the Holy Ghost that my Father in Heaven knows me, knows what I've been through and what I need to do to be the best person he needs me to be. It seems so clear and simple to me, I can truly testify from my own personal experience that God answers the prayers of the meek and sincere. It is for this reason that I am filled with gratitude towards my opportunity to give up Stephen for but a little while, to fortify and strengthen my testimony through Vanhin Koch by the bearing of it to others, hoping to gather them into the fold of Christ, that they too may know that these things are true. Why can't everyone feel the same way I do? What holds people back from softening their hearts to come feel of God's love? Surely, there is nothing in the world that offers the same joy, comfort, and peace, that comes from submitting to the love of our Savior. What a privilege and honor it is to share these glad tidings with those who are both willing, and not willing to receive them.
Overall, I am doing very well. I am so beyond excited to go to Finland, I love it so much already and I'm not even there!! Haha, my MTC experience has been incredible. There is an analogy in preach my gospel that likens the glory of the restoration of the gospel from the period of unbelief beforehand known as the apostasy to a diamond on black velvet. I think this same analogy can be likened into my life, the glory I feel being here on my mission is comparable to the diamond, and the 9 arduous months prior to my arrival is as the black velvet. It goes to show how trials can be a great blessing in our lives, because sorrow is what enables the savor of joy. All of 2 Nephi explains this concept very well, but I will share verses 14 and 15:
14 And now, my sons, I speak unto you these things for your profit and learning; for there is a God, and he hath created all things, both the heavens and the earth, and all things that in them are, both things to act and things to be acted upon
15 And to bring about his eternal purposes in the end of man, after he had created our first parents, and the beasts of the field and the fowls of the air, and in fine, all things which are created, it must needs be that there was an opposition; even the forbidden fruit in opposition to the tree of life; the one being sweet and the other bitter.
What a gift it is to struggle, to feel sorrow, that we may learn and grow as Heavenly Father's plan for us desires us to do so.
I also want to share a video entitled "The Music of the Gospel" that is truly inspiring and heart-warming. It explains how we must "hear the music of the gospel if we are to feel the joy of dancing".
> https://www.lds.org/media-library/video/2017-01-005-the-music-of-the-gospel?cid=HP_FR-27-7-2018_dPTH_fMLIB_xLIDyL1-A_&lang=eng
I made this email a bit longer and more spiritually focused because this is my last opportunity to send an email of this magnitude, because my allotted time to email will be much shorter when I arrive in the field this Tuesday. I hope that perhaps one of you will find inspiration in my testimony, and that this person will desire to act on any inspiration he or she received by giving sincere prayer to God our Eternal Father.
I would like to bear my testimony on the joy of missions, and of missionary work. I am not yet even in my mission field yet, however I already know for myself that missions are the greatest opportunity to grow closer to the God. The experiences I've had here within these first 8 weeks alone have already developed me better than anything else ever could have. I am eager to take on the challenges that lie ahead in the field, and excited to write all about them to share with all of you!! Now I may seem a bit overwhelmingly positive, and this isn't to say that disappointments and discouragements never come. The reason that I am so positive is because it is through the disappointment and discouragements that I have been built up. The beautiful thing about missions too, is that God has a special watch over all of us. Even through all of my struggles, embarrassments, and doubts, I am always saved in the Spirit prior to retiring to bed; as if it is reminding me that today was a good day, and that thine trials will be but for a season. I have learned that there are no coincidences, but God's merciful hand.
I bear my testimony to all of you that God is real, and he desires to have a personal relationship with all of us so that He may pour out blessing more abundantly into our lives. I know that a relationship with God is founded upon a sincere desire to seek out His truth. Testimonies are not given to us, unlike a vast majority of our blessings.Testimonies require a conscious effort to seek after spiritual experiences. Sincere prayer, exercising faith, following commandments, reading scriptures, and deciding for yourself what is true; for truth is not confirmed merely on the basis of the words of others, but in experiencing for yourself what truth is. I have been taught Joseph Smith was a prophet since I was a child, however it wasn't until recently when I began to study scriptures and find that the desire Joseph Smith had to know of God was the same as mine is now. There is great joy in having a perfect brightness of hope in the gospel and in the prophets. What joy comes from doubting? What joy comes from pride? Is there satisfaction in doubt? I think not. I believe, and have felt and experiences, that true happiness comes through successfully seeking out spiritual experiences with God. What a difficult thing this is to do in the modern world of requiring a constant demand to be entertained, distracted, or busy. Oh how great it is then, to be serving a mission during these times where I would likely be idle in the comfort of my previous mind/spiritual-numbing lifestyle.
Family and friends, there is great joy in the service of the Lord. I was fearful previous to my arrival here that these two years would drag on, that it would be a grind until I could get onto college and other things that I desired after; however this mission has proved to be no chore. Having completed my preparatory phase of my mission, I will soon be embarking in the true service to the people of Finland, and I cannot express how grateful and excited I am for this opportunity. What a personal blessing it is that I was called to Finland.
This is a portion of my testimony I leave with you all in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen
- Vanhin Koch
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one of my housemates came back yesterday from his trip to japan (among other places)
facebook spent last month reminding us that we went to japan in dec 2016...
cohuman and i spent a bunch of their winter vacation watching anime, and more than a few were set in places i recognized: we’ve been in that train station! that place is a km north of where we stayed! it’s that place we wanted to go
i want to go back, and we’re planning to, but it’s still at closest months out ...
it’s not very personal, it’s just probably boring.
and while i hope it’s not the case, i’d need to make sure i’d be fine going without my (actually fluent friend) and (not much better than me, but way more confident and willing to speak friend).
last time, on the half of the days that cohuman and i were by ourselves, i did manage to do fine: ordering food*, asking if i could take people’s pictures, the most polite evangelist ever, i even did part of a scavenger hunt type thing?**... but also some notable hiccups***, ****.
also i was so hungry the whole time, because the combo of (there’s fish in everything) and (i don’t know how to explain veganism)and (i hate drawing attention to myself) meant that i lived on riceballs and coco’s curry for two weeks. i had heartburn because i am old now like my parents.
this is to say i need to get better at reading and hearing and speaking and writing japanese; it’s also that i need to either get more willing to make mistakes when speaking, or i need to be justifiably confident with saying simple things so i don’t need to be willing to make mistakes.
previously i had been studying, but i was (1) doing it in a way that eroded my medium-term-motivation; (2) became injured in ways that prevented me from doing things like “sitting up” and “handwriting”; (3) had minimal focus on speaking and writing (specifically, coming up with things to say/write; i did work on pronunciation and learning how to write any specific word); (4) i didn’t have anything i wanted to /do/ with the language, or lacked access; (5) i got more into the “how to do the thing” rather than “do the thing”; (6) i’m hella shy working on it around people, especially when those people are better than me.
1: so, one thing that was happening is that i used anki (great), but i had the intervals tuned in a poor way, i think, and a lot of cards too long, so adding a bunch of stuff on one day would result in a lot of extra work for a week+ after.! i need to figure out how to balance “anki is a great way to remember things” with “the goal is to learn a language, not to have the most beautiful anki setup”. i deffo leaned too hard into the second before, which i did for good reasons, but it’s still too much. i wonder that a way to deal with this might be to both restrict /and/ require doing this? restricting it, as to prevent me from doing it all the time; requiring it, so to both get the benefits from it, and to reassure my brain that i can put it off til later because i am in fact going to do it.
2: fuck, this is a hard one. right now it’s not good because i hurt a tendon from climbing, so i need to take it easy for a week or two, but already my right arm is very weird feeling. i need to find a temporary replacement/adjunct to it to keep my back from getting all weird and bad. i also need to, long-term, get the ergonomics of writing and typing worked out. it’s definitely a really big problem short term because frex i can’t use a /mouse/ right now without my arm insisting that it’s on fire, freezing, and being electrocuted (exaggeration, it just feels sore and stiff).
3: a friend told me about a conversation group in the city; i think that might be a good idea, eventually. i think drilling grammatical forms might be a good idea; i need to figure out a decent way to implement that, though. i don’t want to do it as a one-off thing; i don’t want to do it every day for every form; i want to interleave forms; while an srs thing like anki isn’t a wrong idea for this, it's wrong in a few ways, but maybe ways that can be fixed with python/javascript. so i’m not sure. lang-8 exists and i think that in conjunction with grammatical drills might work.
4: i do actually have things i want to do, now; i finally got introduced to anime that wasn’t high art (millenium actress), really good but pretty much the same as disney (miyazaki), excessively long-running things for children, this blob of idea that i don’t know how to convey why it didn’t do it for me (cowboy bebop, flcl, samurai champloo, ...). it’s also very accessible (streaming whatever i want for 10/mo? this way beats the options i had back in high school). i also yesterday figured out how to convince a certain retailer that my laptop is deffo in tokyo, so cheap ebooks for me, too.
5: I’m not sure how to solve this one, but I think having 4 solved helps a lot. i think that will help turn my goals from “i’m learning japanese; i guess my goal is to get through this pile of textbooks?” into “i’m learning japanese; my goal is to be able to watch most anime without subtitles so i don’t need to wear my glasses”. despite my lack of confidence, i found this morning there are some things i can muddlem y way through, so this is tantalizingly close.
6: fuck, also hard. it probably helps that ‘reading comics’ and ‘watching anime’ and ‘reading a book’ are self-contained, and i can wear headphones for them and therefore i will look uninterruptable, and if there are people around the apartment i can go to one of /18 coffee shops in my neighborhood/ and read there. for things that take up space/mentally, i at least have a lot of time in teh middle of the day to work on them.
i can’t tell if i’m what doing right now is “being more into how to do the thing” than “doing the thing”, or if it’s talking anxiety brain down from “i will necessarily fail” to “there were problems with how i was approaching it before, and knowing that, i can change what i do to deal with them”. both, i guess. probably i got into How Do I Do The Thing Optimally? because i was anxious about failing, wasting effort, doing something wrong, etc.
*i kept misreading spinach, ほうれん草, as ほうれんくさ when it’s ほうれんそう , but i was understood.
** it was based in a mall?? i had to find pictures of pokemon?? we were stuck waiting for some friends one day so we did it while we waited. i got two folders with pictures of Litten and Rowlet for doing it, i think.
*** i didn’t know the word for ‘spit’. you wouldn’t think this is something you need to really know, but apparently.
***** cohuman had some awful blisters and we went looking for moleskin bandages, without success.
sidestory that i had forgotten: one night we went to a restaurant we’d heard of, which had vegan gyoza. we get there, and it’s a teeny weenie narrow restaurant: i think three two-top tables. we came to the door, and the proprietor sat us down. we looked at the menu for a moment and i panicked, because i didn’t see “vegetarian” anywhere, and in fact saw a lot of not-friendly-to-me things. but the owner came back a second later and before i could figure out how to say ‘so it’s that i heard this restaurant had vegetarian gyoza’... “You’re vegetarians.” “Yes.” “You’re hungry.” “Yes.” “Okay, you get ten.”
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