#thread.dusty

[b4rredteeth]

CLOSED STARTER for @drvgonbvnny

Being officially together with Dorothy meant that on a daily basis, Pesor spent an even longer time thinking about her. And also got into contact with her family a lot, whether when they came to pick Dorothy up from their place, or when they happened to see them out somewhere. There was some belief in Pesor’s heart that they’d become a happy family eventually. That they would be accepted and they would be able to join their family dinners and gatherings and special occasions. Of course Dorothy would invite them, and then they’d feel at home, and it was like the family they’d never had. After all, it had only ever been them and their mom. 

So when they saw Dusty sitting all by himself, no little kid in sight, he figured he could go up to him and it would all be alright, after all, they were dating his little sister, and Pesor figured they made Dorothy happy. 

They really hoped they made Dorothy happy. 

“Hey Dusty,” they said, smiling. “Can I uhm… join you here?” they asked, raising their order of burger and fries.

[b4rredteeth]

@drvgonbvnny 14th of September / Duck-Young's home

Abhinav held birthday parties in high esteem, because they knew what it was like to grow up in a big family, and the need people had to have a day where they were the most important individual. Their mother had taught them to treasure birthdays, so they did. Their siblings, their cousins, their own kids, and also the Seong-Graves. Which included Duck-Young’s child as well. 

He’d gotten a Dinosaur-shaped cake and two picture books, both wrapped in Dinosaur themed paper. He arrived at Dusty’s with a huge smile on his face. It had been a while since he’d actually attended a children’s birthday party. Or well, long since his own kids had been that age. It made him slightly giddy, and he had to physically restrain himself from knocking too hard.

[b4rredteeth]

LOCATION: local park @drvgonbvnny

Bijan had requested to see all available pictures and charts from his Doctor. He might be a microbiologist, but he understood biology as well. He wished to see the facts, not because he needed to draw his own conclusion, but to understand it better. If he didn't, it would remain a mystery, a lump of flesh and bone having its own set of problems. If he saw a clear picture, if he could study the image of exactly the damage that had been done to his foot, he would be able to make more sense of what had happened.

Sadly this was not the case, while the bear claw left clear marks and indicators as to where they'd entered the flesh and which bones and muscles they'd scraped along the way, his own fall still made little sense to him.

Still, he'd asked if he could get copies, and with a small portfolio of images and charts, he made his way back home. This was upon agreement with his doctor, who knew there was little they could do for him at the hospital. He needed rest, fluids, and to allow for his own body to heal itself. It would need time, and perhaps it may not heal completely.

Time…

Plenty of time. Luckily - mostly for himself - Bijan was not a difficult patient. He would take it easy because his doctor said so. But he still wanted to go outside. So he'd seated himself in the gardens of the university, with a book, his whole leg taking up the entirety of the bench he'd picked out. And he set to reading. A book on the muscles and bones and cartilage of the foot. He looked up when he spotted a familiar figure. "Duck-Young, how have you been?"

[b4rredteeth]

LOCATION: a bustling diner that never closes TIMESTAMP: evening @drvgonbvnny

Some things would never be creepy to someone like Bijan, some things would always be preferable above others. An empty graveyard at late evening, absolutely no problem, a grocery store where nobody smiled, sounded like heaven.

He lived in libraries, in research labs, in places with few to no people. Finding himself in a bustling diner was unlike him. He was pushed every which way as he searched for a spot to sit with his coffee order and his future cinnamon roll, which was to be brought to him. Eventually someone pushed him and he landed on a chair opposite of a familiar face from the University. "I'll have to impose," he said, throwing a look back at the person who had pushed him. "If that is alright with you."

[b4rredteeth]

Abhinav shook his head. “It is rare for people to be selfish for their own survival, it depends on the person, but usually their ties to others win out from their own selfishness. We humans wouldn’t have been able to survive as a species if we were inherently selfish,” he explained. “The fact that people already are out there trying to find this girl not knowing what might’ve happened to her… while they are scared, it says more than what we’ve been made to believe, or the few instances of this belief being proven that we’ve seen.” Abhinav remembered once when his youngest had cried to their mother about her not coming to their game and how she was selfish for missing it. She had told him, sternly, that one negative does not cancel out all the positives. Instead of focussing on when she wasn’t there, they should focus on all the times she was. 

They nodded. “You do not need to say them out loud,” they assured Duck-young. “Even though I can assure you that I will not judge you for them.” At the request for the exercises, Abhinav paused for a moment, because they had a few ideas, but they weren’t sure which would work best for Duck-Young. They looked around. “Shall we sit somewhere? The most quiet place will work, if you’re up for it, it’s just a mindfulness exercise, but I know at times it can be easier to do it with another person.”

I am sure the others who are doing supplies will look out for each other. Dustin bit his lip, glancing down to his phone. His thumb hovered over Fallon's name listed on his speed dial, the thought in mind that she, too, was part of the volunteering parties — surely if he asked, she would check in. "People can be selfish for their own survival, but..." Faith bled into altruism was tepid at best. Firsthand, had he known how delible selflessness was under crucial circumstances. "People are scared, so they don't always operate like a pact. If you spiral about the what-ifs..." Shrugging eventually, he turned his head to look at Abhinav, mustering the weakest of smiles. They always knew when to appear. As excruciatingly terrible as he was at asking for aid, Abhinav had the sixth sense to show up at the right place, the right time, and the patience to draw the details out of him. One could say he'd closed off his vulnerabilities to boost himself to growing where he needed to be for the sake of his siblings.

"Well... They don't make me feel good, that's for sure." The breath that expelled was wrought with tension, glancing around the street and forthcoming in saying, "They're not really ones I would wanna talk about in public. You know?" Maybe if they weren't so shameful, it would be easier to talk about. Or maybe if Dustin had actual parents to teach him healthy outlets, he wouldn't be so twisted in knots when it came to unfolding. Abhinav as a parental figure did help — unfortunately, the world had other plans of undoing. His hand caught purchase of the door to the café. "What kind of exercise? I've been working with Dr. Meyers, but... it's not gettin' easier."

[b4rredteeth]

LOCATION: darkened streets TIMESTAMP: 14th of February @drvgonbvnny

Pesor was not used to being in this kind of situation on his own. They'd always ended up with their mother beside them, she would make sure to reach for his arm whenever something bad happened, as if she felt it coming. Pesor was always at a loss, always confused and worried. Even more now, when the first person they reached out of didn't pick up. Her phone was dead, it went straight to voicemail. They tried Dusty, they tried a few more names, but they found their phone was empty as well, the battery quickly draining. They had too few people in their address list. Who could they go to if their mom didn't pull them to safety?

Pesor took a deep breath as they ran down the street, where during the day they felt like they knew the town, it was completely different in darkness. They weren't even sure how to get home. "Hey!" they called to the first person they saw. "Do you have a working phone?"

[b4rredteeth]

LOCATION: anchorage circus TIMESTAMP: first week of February @drvgonbvnny

Had Pesor known the moment they'd settled into Anchorage that it has a circus, they would've gone there straight away. Not because they had a certain interest in it, but because it was an almost melancholy feeling that followed them regarding these types of places, of lives they had never really led, of opportunities that hadn't been bestowed on them.

But now they knew Dorothy worked here, they knew someone from their past - an idea that hadn't yet become solid in his brain. They couldn't believe this was happening, and now they were heading to the circus to see if they could find her around, meet her for lunch or just... just see her. They were walking through the area with a huge smile on their face and their hands deep in their pocket as they tried to scan every single face that passed them.

Pesor had not expected to meet another familiar person in Anchorage, and then Dusty appeared out of nowhere and they stopped mid-track, one eyebrow raised. "Dusty?"

[b4rredteeth]

@drvgonbvnny

Benny enjoyed breaking up marriages and relationships. It had never been his intention when he'd slept around when he was younger, perhaps naively he'd believed that people wouldn't cheat on their partners. Though eventually he'd done it himself without much second thought. But by then he'd been an accomplish often enough that he'd already been on the same level.

And now he just revelled in being someone's secret, in the adrenaline rush of doing something that was wrong. He didn't care about the feelings of others, he didn't take those in regard for even a moment. He simply managed to find someone he felt physically attracted to, and did not care one bit about their relationship. Not even if they shot him down.

He clicked his tongue when Dustin walked into the cafe, the place was almost empty, a bit on the dark side given the weather outside, but very cosy.

Cosy enough that Benny felt like every bone in his body was vibrating towards chaos. So he instantly flung himself to Dustin's side, a grin on his face. "I feel like buying you a coffee," he said. And definitely more besides.

[b4rredteeth]

That's... how it is. When you really love somebody. Yeah, Benny had never had that, ever. The idea of anyone doing anything remotely selfless for him, that was impossible. The only person - who wasn’t his grandma - who had ever done something like that for him was the older woman, but even with her, he felt it was more guilt than something genuine. He hated it the most that Dusty acted like it was nothing, as if being loved was just a regular thing, easy-peasy. He gritted his teeth together and tried not to reply. 

He didn’t have to, in a glorious moment he’d totally killed the conversation. And the fuck-up thing was that he didn’t actually care. He was happy that he’d asked the question and that he was met with hate. It was easier to deal with than the puke inducing lovey-dovey bullshit conversation that he’d found himself in. He hated the disgust, but it was easiest to deal with. He frowned, because he didn’t get the question. Because he was rude, and he was nosy, and he really hadn’t care that much about the answer… or had he? He deflected, he didn’t want to think about it any further so he simply shrugged and crossed his arms. He looked away when Dusty thanked him, deciding he wasn’t even going to acknowledge it. He wasn’t going to have Dusty make him feel bad about himself.

end.

Sorry for your loss. Duck-young didn't smile this time — social niceties always felt forced, like the company he was in were obligated to share their sympathies. People were awkward in the face of death. However, the quaint, contented smile that roused was undeniable when he spoke of his partner — no matter their suffering, it was their happiness that he certainly strived for. Maybe even breathed for. "That's... how it is. When you really love somebody," he answered modestly, lifting his shoulders in a cursory shrug, as if it was nothing. It was inconsequential to him.

Then, the question that followed warranted a furrow of the brow. People were overtly inquisitive, morbidly so, spent too much time surfing the dark web for things they shouldn't or picking up exorbitantly grotesque films in the video rental store. It didn't wipe the arrant disgust at the insensitivity that he felt pooling in some ancient chasm. "Why?" It was kneejerk, on the basis that he found the question incredibly rude. Dustin disdained to be made a spectacle, as he had under Sera's limelight. Or as his son's death had. "Is there an answer that won't make you feel like a shitty person for asking?" Unusually forthright of someone so moderated, he lifted his head, raising his dark brows at Benny across the table, challenging him to answer. After a beat, he looked down at his cup, forcing a smile "I should go. Thank you for the coffee," he said softly, rising and clicking his tongue to Ganon. He bowed politely before he took his leave.

[b4rredteeth]

Pesor looked back up to find Dusty hoovering, it wasn’t the person they’d expected to see, or someone they’d thought would be alright with them having another semi-break down. After all, wasn’t that exactly the type of situation they’d found themselves in earlier. They pushed their lips together and stared at their situation on the street. “Oh uhm… hi Dusty… I’m just… having a small freak out on the street because I’m too tired to walk home and have it there?” Even though they felt self-aware, they wouldn’t just say something dishonest about it. Also, they weren’t sure how else to explain their sorry state on the ground. With their chips and sandwiches. “Do you need… help with groceries?”

LOCATION: giant food store @anchoragestarters ( no cap )

Pesor had been fine until the news came in that the missing girl was no longer just missing, she was dead as well. They'd instantly locked themselves in their trailer and hopelessly texted everyone, just random things, asking them how they were, and so and such. Just to keep the conversation going, to not feel alone, as they sat in their completely lighted trailer, where not a single spot was filled in shadow, as if they were five again and afraid of the monster beneath the bed.

Calmed down enough, Pesor had left the trailer looking for food, his backpack slung on the front, hugging it to his chest, hair slightly disheveled - though there was very little to look out of place - and long limbs stepping down the road quickly. He made it to the local grocery store in record time, sweaty from the quick walk - this country was not made for walking - and even more anxious then when they'd left home.

They got a bag of chips and some sandwiches and sat down on the curb, too sweaty and tired to walk all the way back without eating what they'd gotten. It looked like they had just fallen down right in that spot, taking a seat without moving far enough away from the door to not be a little annoying to anyone exiting. They felt a knee bump into them, and instantly started to scoot over. "Sorry sorry," they said quickly, as they scraped their meagre belongings together with them.

[b4rredteeth]

Pesor rubbed their hands together under the table. They’d been called naive before, also a people pleaser and gullible. Even by their own mother, but she’d never suggested they change, just that they took good care of themself and stayed out of trouble. That was the most important thing, and sure she got angry when they did dumb stuff because they didn’t want people to be mad at them, but she’d never set it as a goal or a rule. 

Pesor had spoken with Valerie about marriage too, and she had seemed to want that as an end goal for them and Dorothy. Even though Pesor didn’t know if they wanted marriage. Maybe something like marriage. Something that would set their bond in stone. They had no idea what the options were. They swallowed. They were almost twenty-seven now, most people got married much younger than them. And Dorothy was twenty-four. 

They made themself a little smaller, pushing their shoulders inward, keeping their teeth gritted together. They didn’t know what to say. They felt pain, a stab in their heart because they’d been so happy to be a part of a family, and Valerie had embraced them wholeheartedly, Addison and them were shopping buddies. If they never gained the life experience that Dusty wanted them to gain… did that mean that they could never be part of that family? They wanted to cry then and there, cry because something so solid and beautiful was now crashing down. And they couldn’t tell Dorothy, because this was her big brother. 

They noticed they’d scratched the skin on top of his knuckles, in two places he was bleeding. “Uhuh,” they said, because at least they wanted to make it clear that they’d listened, even if they had nothing to offer in return. 

“I’m uhm… I’m going to go now.” Pesor grabbed their half-eaten food, and made a little wave to Crash, before practically running out of the diner as he threw the food in the trash, not looking back, just wanting to clear his mind in the cold air. 

end.

Yeah, I guess. "Dorothy told me about you two," he elucidated, lifting Crash and easing him into the baby stroller, strapping him in. He offered the toddler a couple extra fries before reconvening his attentions to the former carney, grimacing. "Dorothy... needs someone she doesn't have to worry about when shit goes down. I mean, our life's been hard..." Unfortunately, he didn't think that basic mechanics and price haggling ( which he was fairly certain was frowned upon in most establishments ) were the blossoming qualities of a partner who would add to what Dorothy had in her life. "Right, but that's... that's not what I mean. You know? I think you can be..."

A crooked hand hovered, mid-air. Dustin didn't take a liking to the feeling that he was being disparaging. Protecting his family was something he'd sworn to himself, however, especially after losing his firstborn — he'd been selfish to leave them to fend for themselves, and now he had to look out for their futures. "Naive," he concluded, "I know you're a big people pleaser and that can make you gullible." ( Pleasing others had only wrought misery for he and Sera, in separate ways. ) "I can't stop you two from seein' each other, but I don't think you have my blessing with it until you've... gained more life experience. Especially if you two ever decide to get serious, like... marriage. I think you're both too young for all of that, anyway."

He paused, letting it sink in between them. "I have love in my heart for you, I just think you're not ready," Dustin said at last, collecting his trash and piling it up in the paper bag.

[b4rredteeth]

Pesor nodded. Though so far, they’d been far out of reach of any trouble, maybe because there was nothing interesting about him. They were just a kid who’d come to Anchorage by themself, got a place to stay, a job to fill their time with, and earned just enough to keep their head above water. They had no plans for the future yet, maybe they would, there was a lot they wanted to do, if they dared. They were guarded, and they felt alone. They had plenty of friends in their life now, but they so missed their mother. “Oaky,” they said, firmly, to make sure that Dusty thought they meant it. Because they did, they just hoped their mind would do it too. 

Pesor smiled, awkwardly still. He wished he was better at this, that his mother had allowed him to talk with strangers more. Instead, most of the conversations Pesor had were with people their own age, and when it was with the other cleaning ladies: they rarely had to ask anything, because they would gladly speak without being asked anything. They rubbed their hands together and took a few more fries, then started to wolf down half of the burger, suddenly famished. “I bet he’s doing a lot of exploring,” they offered with a smile. 

Pesor grew slightly pale. Take it easy. So it was a good thing they hadn’t said anything about them being in a relationship yet? Maybe Dorothy hadn’t felt ready telling Dusty yet… they hoped it was that. There was an annoying voice in their head too, one that suggested that Dorothy thought the same things about them. But they didn’t believe that. Maybe from other people, but not Dorothy. They pushed their shoulders together. “Oh uhm… yeah, I guess.” Did Dusty think they weren’t good enough for Dorothy? “She uhm… she mostly taught me on road skills, like fixing the car or haggling for better prices,” they admitted. Skills that Pesor still used. 

Dustin nodded slowly, betraying nothing in his expression, negative or positive. Sure, his siblings were... daydreamers, in their own right — Addison was, after all, the one who'd called him up, sniveling and snotting into the other line as they explained how they'd dug themselves a worm in the core of the Big Apple. The tenement residency he'd established in Alaska wasn't intended to be a permanence, by any means, and that was adding to the difficulty of the situation he was faced with. If he chose to uproot himself again, as the transient he'd never entirely separate himself from, he would want his siblings to stay here, if they felt they'd built a life for themselves. He'd wanted for them to be independent when he emancipated them — at present, they appeared appetent for his guidance, navigating the perplexity of their twenties. "Well, be careful about your surroundings — it's not real safe here lately."

The hypervigilance that curtailed that revelation was undeniable. He picked at another fry, dusting off the gluttony of sodium before feeding it to the earnest child in his lap. "Uh... kinda, he don't sleep as much now that he's eighteen months. Wants to take on the world now that he can walk a lil' bit, talk a lil' bit. You know. But yeah, he's a sound sleeper, when he does." Infants were a handful, but Crash was at that delicate age between a breastfeeding newborn and the terrible twos where he was downright pleasant, and persevering the happy, bubbly personality. The whole stranger danger radar that infants developed was beginning to kick in, though, and he didn't care for anyone whose face he didn't recognize. He'd bawl and hide his face in either parents' shirt, if that were the case.

His polite smile faded an inch. "I see." The family told each other most of their life updates... but if they didn't, he often had an intuition garnered from surrogating the place of their late parents. They'd relied on their circus troupe as parental figures, yet, it was inescapable for a big brother not to enact on instinct. "I think... you two need to take it slow. It seems like you've got a lot to learn." Namely, they reflected on running into Pesor the evening of the blackout a year ago, and how pallid and frightened they were, and utterly muddled. "I know your mom sheltered you... even when you were with Madame Irene's circus with us. Dorothy can protect herself in a pinch, and I worry... your mom didn't leave you with any of those skills. The world's real... dangerous."

[b4rredteeth]

Abhinav nodded, glad to hear the information. If Sera had joined the search parties, he’d be a lot more worried for their safety. At least the supplies would keep them near the town, and not necessarily out in the forest. He didn’t say the obvious thing, that everyone was troubled, or at least most people, there were those who lived on chaos like this. Instead he simply offered hope. “I am sure they’re alright,” he voiced. “And I am sure the others who are doing supplies will look out for each other.” He believed in people in that sense, figured they would know how to do exactly that which was right for each of them, it was easier to look out for those next to you when the situation already felt dire. Humans were pack animals, they would focus on those around them. 

Abhi joined the other walking towards the cafe, because while the answer ‘I’m okay’ was given, he knew he could be of company, that was a way to help anyone who was alone with any type of thoughts. He didn’t know Fallon, not in any friendly manner, but anyone out there to help Sera was good with him. He rubbed his neck at the mention of intrusive thoughts, it was the type of thing that most people dealt with, and a thing even he struggled with from time to time, but his were always about his wife and his kids, wondering how they would end up, how it was for his kids to not have a mother anymore. He had plenty of people who were his patients who had lost a parent. “Intrusive thoughts aren’t bad, necessarily, we can do an exercise for them, if you want?”

Duck-young bit the inside of his cheek, nodding affirmatively when Abhinav echoed his words, then abruptly shook his head, whipping his black and blue hair about. "No, no... Just supplies." They had a debate over whether Sera should bother with it, too. Ultimately, he would always respect his spouse's wishes — whatever their motive would be for them. "We agreed the search parties would be too much," he added, plus, he couldn't imagine them ending up in the same group alongside Josette — it would be a bloodbath. Fidgeting in place, he bit on the tip of his tongue, pondering if he was overbearing in his anxieties ephemerally. "I just... hope they're taking care of themselves. They were troubled this morning." An unsettling blanket over the town would oft prod a metal goad into their paranoia, he was acutely aware without it shared. The empath had learned decades ago how to read what they were feeling, however subtle or clouded.

Craning his head when he realized he was blocking foot traffic, Dustin began to plod toward the café. "I'm... okay." The half-truth was frailer in the older former carney's presence, looking down at his phone one more time and forcing himself to watch where he was going. "I know Fallon's supposed to be out there, too... She'll look out for them. But..." An irksome grimace pervaded, and he reached to rub over his brows, the sigh that escaped him aching his bones. "I... I have these intrusive thoughts when shit like this happens. It's hard."

[b4rredteeth]

Pesor shook their head. “No, but I must’ve been uhm… with my head in the clouds.” They didn’t know what it was like to have a kid. But it went bigger than that, Pesor just didn’t know how to have anyone else in their life except for their mom. They’d never been in a place long enough to become part of something, they were always on the outside looking in. The stranger who was trying to be a part of something but also knowing that he would have to move on at some point, when their mother packed everything up and they left again. 

They nodded, though they didn’t know much about one year olds. And they didn’t remember being a child, nor their mom telling them any stories about how they were young. “Babies sleep a lot too, right? Is he a fitful sleeper?” they asked. Would Dusty let them babysit? They figured they could ask the ladies at their job about how to take care of little kids, they had plenty of them, and they loved talking about their kids and their grandchildren. They were still smiling, awkwardly like always, but happily as well. Participating in a bigger family. They took a few fries and pushed them into the milkshake. 

Their eyes got wider when Dusty asked about them and Dorothy, surprised. They opened their mouth slightly as they thought of an answer. Pesor wasn’t sure they were the person who should be telling Dusty… hadn’t Dorothy? They swallowed. Maybe this was like those situations they’d been in before: where the father or the brother would pull them apart and ask them what their intentions were with their daughter - most of the time, they rarely got those types of talks when it was someone’s son or child. “Uhm…” They didn’t know how to answer that question, frowning slightly. “We’re… dating?” they asked. Just in case Dorothy hadn’t said anything yet and she wanted to tell Dusty herself.

"Didn't see 'im in my lap?" Dustin remarked lightheartedly, pondering if the latest pandemonium had elicited paranoia in the other as they jumped. Crash wasn't the size of a peanut anymore, but... he was still a baby. The doting parent that he was, the separation anxiety of going anywhere without being able to keep an eye on him had been insurmountable. The remainder of his own meal had been unappetizing after he'd descended into ruminations of he and Sera's recent conversations, and he was happy to allow the infant to explore his developing palate more as he took advantage of time away from pages of scans on his laptop and his textbooks.

"Ah, we're okay. Tired. One year olds, they're... energetic." He shrugged, automatically deflecting the I into a we. Oftentimes, growing up, his focal point had been his siblings — and that followed him into adulthood. The happiness and needs of others was tertiary to his own, and unlearning that in marriage counseling was a giant he had yet to lay to rest. Lounging back in the seat, he took stock of the others milling around the food court, then to Pesor. "So, um... you and Dorothy." It wasn't a topic he'd pursued head on — what, between chasing after Crash, and watching an extra dog with Fallon in rehab — and he bit his inner cheek as he debated it. Scooting the napkin closer to his child, he folded his hands together, embracing Jungsoo in his arms. "Wanna tell me what's going on there?"

[b4rredteeth]

Benny frowned. “Didn’t say that,” he responded, a little annoyed, though he bit it back quickly. The other wasn’t about to catch him getting annoyed, not when Benny simply had one goal in mind. “I’m comfortable knowing there is going to be chaos anyway, doesn’t make sense protecting myself even more from the inevitable with a watchdog.” He also didn’t like dogs, but for all his bitching and violence, Benny never had a weapon with him. Not even a knife, because he knew that if you brought a weapon to a deal, it was sure to make said deal dangerous one way or another. And he’d also been more careful since his hand had been hurt, he couldn’t deal a punch like he used to. He licked his lips. He still had no idea what the other was on about, but he didn’t have to think much, because before he knew it, a phone was produced and pictures were shown. “Alright, the glow in the dark thing is kinda cool,” he said, looking at the pictures. “What do you do with them? Breed them for money?” He couldn’t imagine anyone keeping anything other than a cat or a dog for no reason. 

Sounds like you live in a dangerous world, then? Brows knitted together, the glean of his piercings catching the fluorescents above to coruscate brilliantly, and he regarded Bhaskar with skepticism. Perhaps, he and Sera had always seen the world through a lens of pessimistic greys, as they had already experienced macabre at a young age. "...I think it's naive if you think anywhere is safe," he said after a pause, belying from the full breadth of his opinion on the conviction to the other man. Trying for a weaker smile of politeness, he added softly, "You're too comfortable if you're not thinking about the possibilities." Sure, he couldn't spend the remainder of his life looking over his shoulder — yet, how could he perform any differently, under the circumstance? He'd been thrust into the world without parachute, and siblings that relied on his ability to teach them how to protect themselves. Withdrawing his cup closer to himself, he brought the rim to his lips, arising his brows. "Oh. They glow in the dark. Different colors," Dustin explained, standing up to rummage his pockets for his phone, flipping through the albums after he swiped it to unlock, "Um, I built a tank. The ones that are built into the walls? So I could build mini enclosures for the frogs, too. Not all frog species get along, they're sort of greedy."

[b4rredteeth]

Benny didn’t sense any discomfort in the other, so he figured he was doing alright. With a bit of luck he could still spin this the right direction, or perhaps even just the affirmation of the other would be enough to consider this a job well done. If it didn’t happen, well, he wasn’t one to dwell on it for too long. He did however not have in mind for the conversation to try and play with his feelings. Benny had never been immune to the sadness of others, though he’d learned to keep that kind of shit at a distance, it didn’t serve him in his line of business, and too often people had tried to take advantage of him with their sob stories. He bit his lip as he tried to force any type of bullshit reaction back from being uttered. Naturally he would deflect, it was in his nature to invalidate everyone else around him so he didn’t have to feel uncomfortable. It was also very clear that Dusty loved his partner, and that Benny was perhaps fighting a losing battle trying to get into his pants. “Sorry for your loss,” he said, spinning his own cup between his hands and refraining from looking directly at Dusty. Yeah, it got to him, and it got to him even more when he didn’t deflect. “That’s kinda adorable though, that you got this one thing that made them smile and build a whole thing around it.” And fucking puke-inducing as well. He tried to not look as jealous as he felt. So instead he would be a fucker and be nosy. “What happened to your kid?” 

The corner of Dustin's mouth twinged imperceivably, and yet, he said nothing. It was a trait he had perfected throughout his life, pleasing others and denying the pretense of discomfiture or disagreement. The immaculate entertainer, Duck-young Graves-Seong. If he had spoken up or allowed for his expression to waver, then perhaps it would have been evident that he found the other's penchant for destruction to be a turn-off in conversation. His lips returned to the straw to suck up another ounce of the iced Americano, smiling politely when the barista brought the to-go order labeled for his spouse as he tucked his phone away. He paused, hesitant to explain it to someone so openly... well, independent. "It's just, um..." Lowering himself back into the seat, he didn't shy away from sharing one forthright tidbit about himself — he would not allow Jungwoon to be buried beneath shame or treated as if it were a topic he couldn't acknowledge. People could be awkward, or uncomfortable, and none of that would alter the truth he was living. "My first son... he passed away. My partner..." Sucking in a breath, he brushed his fingers against his fringes, pushing them aside. "We had a hard time. I've never seen Sera so heartbroken. I was, too, but... Later, I bought them this frog they wanted. Think it's the first time I saw them smile again at something that wasn't me and I..." He shrugged, looking down at Ganon and patting the dog on the head. "I built the aquarium 'cause it makes them happy... Sera likes to look at them, and they'll smile. I would do anythin' to make them happy."