#tmntxgennuetralreader

[leoandraphssoulmate]

Don’t Forget Me

LeoXGenNuetralReader

Trigger Warning: Grief, Death of a Child, Amnesia

Blinding flashes. A cold breeze. A white wedding dress fluttering out around your legs. It’s what you see and feel when Donnie requests that you try again. To close your eyes and dig deep. To try and recall anything you can. You don’t want to disappoint him, but you just can’t seem to pull any images of him up in your mind. Let alone what happened. You frown, your brow furrowing as you stare up into his reddish-brown eyes. 

“It’s ok.” He sighs. “We can try again tomorrow.” He turns, grabbing a large black coffee mug from the table. 

“I don’t understand why I can’t remember him.” You wrap your arms around your middle, your eyes squinting. “Why can’t I just go to him? Maybe it will jog my memory?”

“I don’t want to risk either of you possibly going further into shock than you already are.” He says softly, his eyes flicking from you to the closed brown door off to his left.

“Does he remember anything? Is he at least ok?” You ask, your gaze also traveling to the door.

 “No, he doesn’t and yes, he’s fine. I work with him every day too. I’ve done extensive research on amnesia over the last week and I’ve yet to come across anything like this.” He shook his head. “You’ve both been through something very traumatic. I can only guess that your minds disassociated from each other, along with the event.”

Your stomach tensed, sending a wave of nausea through you. “And you're absolutely sure that telling me about it, or even about him, might damage me further?” You swallowed. 

“I’m one hundred percent positive it will. Your mind has held on to who you are, and kept your memory of me, Mikey and Raph intact, but shut him behind a steel reinforced door. “ Donnie shrugged. “While I understand it, I don’t really understand it.”

“How long will it take for me to remember him? I don’t think I can stand not knowing much longer!” You slowly stand, your eyes still locked on the brown door. “I may not remember him, but I can feel our connection.”

“It’s not a linear thing. Every case is different. It could be weeks, or it could be months. Even years.” 

You snap your attention to him, your eyes wide. “Years?” You whisper harshly. “I can’t do this for years!” You squeeze your hands into fists. “Donnie? You need to let me see him.” Donnie slowly shook his head. “Donnie?” Your eyes begin to water. 

Donnie sighs. “Look, if either of you haven’t made any progress in two weeks, I will. Deal?”

“Deal!”

The next two weeks were torture. You hated not knowing what happened to you. To him. How could your mind simply erase your other half? How could you remember Donnie and the others, but not him? How could your mind keep certain things the way they were, but then dump the rest? You still trained and fought like a boss, leaving Raph and Mikey with more than a few bruises. Your passion for art and music remained, but the moment you tried to recall his face, there wasn’t anything there except for a blank space. 

After a rather hard training session, you began cleaning your katana, weary of your next session with Donnie. Every time you delved deeper into your mind, you found that it was becoming increasingly harder to recall any sort of memories from before. Even the flashes of your wedding dress were starting to fade. Lost in thought, you carelessly slid your fingers over the blade's edge, slicing into your flesh. “Ah shit!” You quickly pulled your hand away, sucking air through your teeth. 

“Y/N! Are ya ok?!” Raph shouted as he ran towards you. 

You held your right hand up, blood running down your wrist. “I cut myself.”  You pressed your lips together, utterly pissed at yourself. 

“Uh, ya ya did!” Raph’s green eyes widened as he reached for your hand, gently applying pressure at the base of your sliced fingers. “Let’s get ya to Donnie.”

Your eyes followed the trail of blood as it ran down your wrist, then dripped to the floor, your heart rate increasing. Suddenly, you weren’t standing next to Raph anymore. The dojo disappeared altogether. There he was. He was standing next to you. “Leo?” You whispered. Leo. God, how you wanted to sing his name! 

“She’s gone.” He said softly, flames reflected in his eyes. 

You turned your head to see flames. Bright orange and yellow flames. Devouring a two story home. Your heart squeezed. Intense emotions flooding your system. Emily. Her name was… “Emily!”

“Emily!” You shouted, the dojo coming back into focus. “Leo!” You pulled away from Raph, your feet carrying you to the one place you had wanted to be from the start. The brown door. You raised your fists, beating on the outside. “Leo!” After a few seconds, the handle slowly turned and the door opened. 

“Y/N?” Leo reached for you, the fingers on his right hand also bleeding. 

You both stared at each other for what seemed like eternity, your body's shivering. Not from cold, but from grief. Grief of a lost child. You took a deep breath, launching yourself into his arms. His strong arms.

Dedicated to all of those who have lost a child🫂💔

@leosgirl82 @thelaundrybitch @miss-andromeda @scholastic-dragon