#to befriending mischa and sharing Constance’s joy during sugar cloud | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

blackkewpie · 1 year

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not to expound upon the political implications of fandom every chance i get but noel gruber is revolutionary gay representation because he wants to be fucked up and evil and it is so disheartening to see transformative works where they act like his wants and personality are character flaws. roadblocks in the way of the most conventional and milquetoast gay romance story ever put to word document. which isn’t terrible but the fact of the matter is noel gruber exists to say not every gay person wants to be normal or wants to have a normal easy heteroimitative life. marlene dietrich was a bisexual woman who endured mountains of hardship on every level and did important things and made important art. jean genet was a writer and activist who lived on the fringes of society doing survival sex work for most of his youth. liberace was never *out* out and was torn apart relentlessly by tabloids about his life. these are the people he canonically admires, he wants to be a starving artist and live a fantastic, queer, risky life that offends and challenges the mainstream. not because he is too naive to want a normal quiet life, but because he was raised in the bosom of the most banal, sterile, conservative small town existence he could have possibly been in and knows for a fact he wants the complete opposite. queer assimilation to the heteronormative standards of life has been a powerful tool in our survival, yes, but the point of that is to survive to make a world where that isn’t necessary anymore. the ease straight white cis abled society offers is one that exists at the expense of those who do not fit it. that is why the girl is fucked up. in a perfect world she shouldn’t have to be any other way.

#idk I just started reading a massively hyped transformative work in the fandom and jfc #it doesn’t hurt anybody and I know why it’s there #but dear lord #the amount of times they go out of their way to either implicitly or explicitly #punish or contort the aspects of Noel that make him fucked up #it’s just interesting #esp because they also make him trans which is why I’m reserving judgement #obviously they’ve done some of the work bc they’re not being weird about his gender expression #but OOOF you’re so close come on come on you can do it #also my other favorite character is constance and I can talk about black joy and radical acceptance with her for hours #but understanding what is oppressive about small conservative hegemony is crucial to understanding noel #and tbh thats his flaw to overcome by the end of the show imo #going from take me up and away above this small town cliche #to befriending mischa and sharing Constance’s joy during sugar cloud #realizing he did challenge people and was tragic and counter culture in his own way #in his own silly little small town #that’s the mountain he scales #to stop reducing his own accomplishments #but that has nothing to do with changing the fact that he doesn’t want to be like everyone else #and would have taken his queer rebellion further if he could have #ride the cyclone

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