#to put their opinions on the internet and only be met with ppl who agree

[athena-xox]

Y’all… I just like arguing okay

I’m seeing this whole Apple discourse and it’s like a debate where you’re not sure if you’re going to be opposition or prop and you have to prepare for both

So if I see something on Apple and I have a counter argument - even if I disagree with my argument - I’m gonna use it

I genuinely cannot tell how serious people are on this whole thing so if I’m actually causing problems because I’m reblogging arguing with like ten posts a day … sorry 😭😭

I promise I’m just a contrarian 🙏

[symptoms-syndrome]

Nothing triggering just don't want my ramblings reblogged and taken wildly out of context

Saw someone's Carrd bc someone else was making fun of their DNI and one of the things on it was "systems" and I'm like u know what actually. That's fine I agree I'd put that on my own DNI most systems online annoying AF esp if they self describe as systems LMAO. Like I won't bc I don't particularly care but I am gonna be 100% and say that when I have met people IRL who have told me they are systems right away 99% of them have gone on to be the most uncomfortable and terrible experiences only a little ways down the road. There are exceptions I think it's highly in the way you frame it but. Yeah.

Plus I mean it didn't even say smth like pwDID so I'd personally interpret it more like. IDK how I don't like ppl who self describe as "aspies" which is a distinct subcategory of people w autism. Like that's not about the autism itself yanno it's about the self-decided identity one has chosen to use moreso than the actual. Diagnosis or whatever.

Ofc my personal opinion on DNIs (that they're kinda pointless at best) still stands who I have no horse in this race at all really I'm just a funny guy on the internet.

Also ofc this does not apply to any of my moots ILY all dearly none of y'all are annoying that's why we're moots. Plus like. The context of Tumblr dot com is different on account of. I talk abt DID here ofc people are gonna talk abt DID.

Which is different than, for example, me being at a party and someone just out of the blue talking about being a system which is a real thing that did happen and was extremely weird of them and clearly made a lot of people around them mega uncomfortable LMAO...like not just the disclosure of a diagnosis but it was def talked about in a weird sort of TMI way and also like. At a party it's like ok what...where do u want this conversation to go u know. Like if I'm like "I've been rly enjoying Hannibal recently" someone can respond with "OMG I love that show" or "I want to watch it, I've been watching a lot of Criminal Minds tho" or "I tried it and didn't rly like it, but I love Madds Mickelson" or whatever like that's me saying a thing about me to which the other person can talk about them like how mutually enjoyable casual conversation goes but when it's smth like "I have DID I'm plural wanna hear abt my alters" like IDK what are the responses to that. Feels like it's mostly. You want the convo to center around you.

And ofc that's not necessarily always a bad thing it's just. Not exactly a party kind of conversation to have with people who just met you. Like ofc there are times and places where you can and should have conversations focused on you it's just like..........a party with strangers is not one of them. There's a huge difference between like. Sitting down with a friend or loved one to talk about your DID/OSDD and that.

Also ofc ofc autism w/e can influence like. Social cue awareness like that n everything. But intent vs impact doing it out of like. Ignorance doesn't make it any less uncomfortable for ppl. Like I've definitely pulled an autism and had social cues fuckin zoom over my head at the speed of sound (ha) and made ppl uncomfortable but u do gotta own that to some degree. Bc there is a point where not knowing social cues does evolve into willfully ignoring social cues.

TLDR

Anyway this is long rambling about nothing I'm just thinking thoughts

[amusims3]

Replies & Thanks

this gonna be a long oen i think, been awhile.

firstly to friends who like & put nice comments on my wips and ccs!!! i love you guys~ @simsophoniques, @shaysugar, @trembling-hands, @fyachii, @enchantedunicornhideout, @simnovels, @thesimperiuscurse, @kyimu, @my-simension, @ktarsims, @wannabecatwriter, @itheaxel, @rosiesimming, @nekoi-sims there are probs more but i went back as far as I could! Thank you guys always <33333333333

CC sharing post:

smellslikepixeldolls: unfortunatly ppl stealing from everywhere :(

Ickkk idk why even it is free stuff!!

rosiesimming: I don't think going anywhere else will limit the possibility of people stealing. If they can download it, they'll claim it if they don't care. It's a shame, but it's the internet. :(

I guess I just had too high expections of people to be decent! It really is a shame to me

enchantedunicornhideout: Yeah people will keep stealing, so either you decide to not care about idiots like that, or you stop creating. It's just a shame it has to be like this, but there will always be idiots in the world, so try to not let them get to you.

I don’t think I would stop creating over it, I make my cc for myself mostly lol. I just wish there was easier or smaller way to share and have rude people just stay out of it haha.

ktarsims: I think that's basically a universal experience on the internet. Not just confined to tumblr, or to the sims community. The internet brings us all closer together in a way, because it allows communication that wouldn't be possible otherwise. Unfortunately, there's no way to prevent the idiots from having access. The only way I can really think of would be to have a private forum or discord or something, and only share/show the content there and never display it publicly.

That might be a good idea thank you! I just wouldn’t want to seem like I am inconveniencing the nice people for them to access my cc by having to have different accounts discord/etc. Because most people ARE nice. And turning off anon silenced the rude ones for now anyway! It’s just the people who silently download then monetize my cc with crap ads that get to me most.

nekoi-sims: Gotta agree with Ktarsims here. A private discord or smth would be best?

I will consider it! I have two finished dresses I am using that I wanted to share but now I’m not sure if I even want to bother on tumblr since the thiefs shop here lol

Turning off anon asks post:

simsophoniques: Best decision ever done you won't regret it

When I turned it back on I thought it would be good for shy ppl... Nope just people asking the same question over and over and telling me how I am doing things “wrong” etc. Much happy that I turned it off, you are right!!

Anon ask about dress post:

rosiesimming: She did warn us that it was temporary. She tells us all the time what will only be available for a short time and it's her choice as a creator. Seriously, she doesn't even have to make stuff for us at all. She doesn't have to share, so be grateful for what we do get. CC creators get way too much shit from people that don't even know how to make things themselves. Just...be fucking grateful. >.>

Thank you, I was wondering if my post was just very hard to understand or something since I suck at typing!!

kyimu: There were warnings and even if not, she doesn't have to warn everybody about things she's doing on her blog. She has so many beautiful creations, doesn't use adfly and so on. Just as @rosiesimming​ said - be grateful. If you don't want to miss something again, become one of her followers, she deserves it anyway.

Yes the best way to catch the limited downloads is to follow! All the other cc are free and open at all times. But occasionally I like to do special things for the followers who actually support me! And I have met soo many nice people from that first limited dress I made (like you)!! Also I have said before I don’t mind sending the limited downloads out to friends later on! still they just whine on anon or straight up ask, not even a “hi” sometimes LOL that’s not FRIENDS!

itheaxel: And amu always leaves them on for days before taking it down. ^_^ I think you're being reasonable. <3

I’m happy it works easily for you! That was my intention xoxo

thesimperiuscurse: Oh dear. That sounds a bit entitled, nonny. Amu is kind enough to share her wonderful cc, and that should be more than enough. And in the end, it's only one dress for a computer game! There are many, many other dresses you can download :3

Thank you :) this is my feeling too. That anon also sent 4 more messages explaining what I should do instead in their opinion, but apologizing.. but it was still saying i should change how i release cc. so.... i guess it’s not just one dress to her lol

ktarsims: All I can say, Nonny... is that because you aren't on Tumblr yourself, you seem to be unfamiliar with the way things work here. Lots of simblr's make things. Many, if not most, make at least some things that are time-limited. The rule of thumb here is that if you want something, you should download it immediately. You don't have to install and use it immediately, but download it right away, because later it might be gone. There's also no point to trying to make the cc creators feel bad. It's their own creation, and each of them does as they see fit with their own creations. They share, or do not share, as they're so inclined. Sometimes whole blogs disappear overnight because someone decides they don't want to be here anymore. Be grateful for what you get, and know that if you missed out on something due to delaying to download it, you've only yourself to blame. Go look for something else.

I know about those dispearing blogs... when I first got back into Sims 3 after uninstall....... so much cc was just gone or hard to find. or adfly 1 2 3 just to get to nothing xD I just moved on and found other peoples great cc that was available. I probably wouldn’t do that lol I don’t see the benefit of deleting my open downloads when so many people already have it anyway.

Other thanks

Thank you to those who include me in those memes things tags. I will do them eventally, was jsut away from my desktop and mobile is too hard to make those post for me.

I am also a bit behind on checking out all of your latest posts because tumblr mobile app is torture to me xD

and finally Thank you kyimuuuuu !! I can’t wait to play cats&dogs soon and have my kitties in sims 4 too. My next lace dress cc will be for you ❤ ❤

[asleepingwindow]

As a final post on this “discourse” sideblog, I want to talk about something not specific to the ace discourse, but rather something that cuts across all groups, all people online or off. Whatever you are arguing or whatever side you are on, we as humans are prone to confirmation bias and the online world is no better place than to create echo-chambers.

I have always felt that teaching myself skepticism was one of the best things I could have done for myself. It was during that time I was also active in the atheist community, online and off. The skeptic and atheist community often overlapped and it was from these groups that I became a feminist.

New atheist groups often wonder why they are largely made up of white men, and if you challenge them on their sexism/racism etc… it becomes obvious why, which is what happened to me. I was the darling women on a majority male forum agreeing with them that religion is the source of all evil, therefore exempting atheist men from things like sexism and all other bigotries. It wasn’t until an argument about rape culture came up that I saw just how deeply misogynist some of these men were.

So my venture into skeptic and atheist groups not only taught me the scientific process and logical fallacies but it also steered me towards social justice. I am no longer friends with any of those people in real life or online. Once I became a feminist and was able to identify their sexism, I wasn’t their darling atheist spokeswoman anymore. It was another valuable lesson in the way people form their groups and their echo-chambers within. How people will ignore some really bad things just to stay included and how they will turn when someone strays. Some people may be thinking of trump supporters now, but everyone is susceptible to this type of behavior.

Fast forward a few years later, but still a few years ago and I had to deal with a callout on an anonymous forum I moderated bc they monitored my tumblr and I made the sin of reblog from and being in mutuals with the wrong people, (who were just ppl they didn't like including people I’ve since met IRL.) I was dubbed a transphobe not for anything I explicitly said or did that was transphobic, it was guilt by association. Had to leave the forum, as this was also invitation to make up other horrible things I never did bc they could and now ppl were ready to believe.

This is around the time TERF started catching on, and while I certainly agree with calling out transphobia in feminism (I would never insist a trans woman is male, I think thats a violent act against trans women! And I despise it being done in the name of feminism) but at the same time it turned into a witch hunt for anyone who talked about sex-based oppression that even ended up attacking other trans woman for not towing a certain Tumblr rhetoric on these issues!

I’m no LGBT elder by any means, but I have been online since I was about 12 and I’m 32 now. I remember a time when the internet was far more horrible on SJ matters but also far more anonymous. People never dropped their real name; now one of the biggest social media sites requires it. And before that even happened I still saw a lot of petty bullshit happening online that wound up really hurting people IRL. So now with it easier to find out who people are and where they live, I can only imagine how online drama has ruined lives. We know it has driven people to suicide, and so as fun as it is to get self righteously angry at people for whatever your cause is, there’s still a person at the other end and no one’s perfect.

I am truly disturbed at how incredibly cliquey SJ groups are online, how callout posts aren’t for extreme racist sexist bigots, but for some drama I can’t even parse in their so called “proof”. And then you have activists on this site who block anyone who disagrees with them so their criticisms can’t show up in the notes. Some even go so far as dox people now for daring to disagree! K(And let’s be clear, I shed no tears for literal nazis being doxxed and losing their job, that’s just not what I’m seeing)

It’s easy, its human nature to fall into social pressures and conform to whatever the Big Names in your group are saying without question and to defend an absurd position based on emotional attachment than logical assessment. And we know it’s also easy to fall into a mob mentality and scapegoat people for all our problems. It’s also super fucking easy to plead mental illness and pretend you should be allowed to say anything you want without criticism, something that I hate so much as one who suffers from many mental issues including anxiety. (That’s why I created rules for myself when arguing online so I didn’t end up giving myself panic attacks over an internet edge lord)

I say this knowing I have participated in this behavior myself as well as having been a victim of it. But a lot in my life has changed and I am an older and sicker… and still likely to make similar mistakes. Point is I have learned and I have trained myself to not to fall into these traps and it does help. Experience is one hell of a teacher but it doesn’t have to be the only one.

No one can know if they are 100% right on any given issue, we all have our convictions for a reason. The difference is are you willing to listen to dissent? Are you willing to challenge your opinion and put it to the test? Or do you make block lists and shun anyone who entertains any different opinion? (a classic tactic amongst anti-vax groups when a parent sees the science) My convinction of many of my beliefs comes from the fact I have argued them over and over again, discharging beliefs that did not pass the test, while strengthening my arguments for and belief in those that do.

Make no mistake, when it does come to the so called “discourse” both sides can be guilty of this shit. I claim no purity. And I am in no way implying that we tolerate hate groups and violent hate speech, like those of nazis bc unfortunately nazis are actually relevant again, but I am saying some of you need a reality check on what that exactly entails, because a lesbian speaking her truth is not it.

And for god sakes don’t put teens on block lists, you know it invites harassment, you fucking know it.