#unless u're fucking RICH

[snow21ella]

despite all her battles in Life

The most painful one is when they took her innocence

when she was a child .At age 11 she was sexualized

Her thin frame and develop body older stare and hollar

She hung out with cousins 3 years older then she was

Friends at school are 2 years older. She was so mature that they never questioned her age unless she mentioned it or asked

Her virtue was taken by a guy who was twice her age .

He knew it was wrong . She had dated an older guy before

The difference is that the one she dated respected her when she said stop and hurt and let go and kiss her softly and apologize.

Not all men are the same . The person who took her virginity just wants her for one thing .She pushed and told him to stop .

her body froze wanting to scream but silence in the motel room

tears run down her face and want to escape

By his surprise blood in the sheets he smiled and looked at her ask so this was your first time.

She said yes he took in the shower to rinse her off

He was hopefully you end up pregnant and we can try again

She got back home and showered for like an hour scrubbing her body off crying blame herself

She then had to hear someone she knew oh she lost virgin she was walking different

She wondered why the young women envy her if she never did anything to offend her.

She still saw him each time she went to soccer games with family

She avoids him each time

That was the only time she was assaulted though

Was her frame or because every one she always complemented how pretty she was.

Since that day her insecurities begin

Most of the guys she talk just want her for one thing sex

They treat her like an object not a person

She never knew how to make love only how to fuck

She always walks with confidence to hide her insecurities

She loves deeply and heart is still hopeless in finding true love

People assume she was stuck up and better than everyone

She would rather be known for that beneath the layers of trauma she had to carry at young age

She holds everything in to protect her self

She has a wall for the reason

People she trust took advantage so trust doesn't easily

She only let few people in and see the real her

This is why her circle was small back then growing up

Her first love broke her heart and abused the trust she given him just to throw in her face when they argued.

She holds her tears in because no one ever listens or care

She had learned to survive in the world of men who saw women like a piece of meat

So at times when she starts to treat them the same

She can count with two hands how many have touched her

Her body count is not much even though she has a wild side of her

She has ignored rich men before because her body meant the world to her since it was taken

She found true love that cut deep now that she way older

She wonders if it lasts forever than her ex .

She has only been in a serious relationship 4 times

This was the second longest one she had since her past bf

She let her wall down a lot with this one

She actually knew what making love felt like

She thought to herself he might be the one I want to spend growing old with

Every time she talks about him to family she had this biggest smile

Everyone notices her eyes light up each time she picks up his calls or reads a text

She trusted him with her heart and told him not to break like her last one did

She had trust issues he knew and promised to honest and loyal

She has healed from her past relationship

When she met him it was when her heart was broken

Somehow he managed to make her pick up and put back together with each kindness,kiss and love jest u're he made.

She fell in love with his charm and how he carried himself in a world full of people that criticize his looks

He gave no fucks what people thought

His walk with confidence of knowing he was good looking

Every Girl and Guys complement him

Always wonder what he saw in her to look her way

He can have any girl he wants

He had flaws and his emotions never show

He did talk much about his life

He brought the wild side and kink side she hidden so deep in her soul

she wants to try with him

He was her safe place and always will be

He was her Peace at one time

She Fallen for him so deep some red flags where ignore

She loves him unconditionally that she lost who she was

She hated to introduce herself again start over

Give her Body to someone else

She gave him her heart to not break

Years later his actions and distance make her question

his love for her.

If it was just her she would left a long time ago

She became this person that was toxic and insecure ,jealousy that she never felt

She hated that

She is starting to be annoyed by it

He drove her question herself who she was

Was she just a peace of ass for men

Her confidence was there anymore

Her trust broken

When she cried and he didn't care

She had put this wall up again

Hold everything in until she was by herself

She hates sleeping alone

She was so used to being alone and just having fun when she was in her 20s

That to try again with her ex one time she debated

She loved the freedom it brought being single back then

Now it is different due circumstances

He made her be emotionless each time he broke her heart

Although her thoughts and feeling where running in her mind

She forgot how to communicate them

Her silence she wonders did he question it

Does he even care

She could left him for someone with money

All she wanted was for him to love her like she loved him

Be his one only was that selfish

Yes , she just wanted to feel real love for once

She wants him to touch her mind and soul

She wants to build an empire with him

When neither of them push each other out to become a better version of themselves and put challenges within each other

Is it even love?

Is the spark even there?

Losing someone you love is easy to let go

But loosing and letting go to best friend that you feel in love

is the pain full heart break to heal from

Not only did loose them you lost yourself to

when someone put so much love that forgiveness is easy forgetting is the hard part.

Falling out love is the toughest processes

Especially if she still has to be contact with him

she can't just block them and act like they never existed

When she has beautiful little people that look like them

She learn how to keep her heart still pure

Heart shattered but healing will take time

She became stronger than she thought she was

Her fire in her soul waken to become the best version of herself

Fearless , still hopeless romantic with little bit of wild

She is still growing and learning about her self

She not given fuck what people got say

walking with her head held high and Fixing that crown

He has pushed that button where she wants to act out

She is still in control of herself

Self Destruction is not showing due to know is it worth it

Why act out of control when it gives other pleasure to see out character

Now that is power that not everyone Can handle that power

Silence speaks volumes

Patient is taught

love is learn

Rage is given because circumstances

Anger is built

Peace is within yourself

Ego is Driven if given

The soul can be crushed for those who let it be taken

she decides when it is time to walk away not wasting her time she just walk away

She is in the control table and has turned She step up the game for a man who needs to say what they want and set her free if you are going to be wasting her time and not live her correctly.

She still loves him Just be a man to be the to let go if you don't feel the same.

[taocastleprincess]

i'm ranting for a second bc i've been ignoring everyone ALL DAY bc this shit is so irritating. like it's making me so anxious what the fuck // and i'm on mobile so i can't put this under a read more so i'm sorry in advance for clogging your feed w my personal drama :(((( i literally CANNOT and WILL NOT be able to rest until we finally put the deposit down on this apt and sign the lease. idk why everyone else is acting like NOT having a place ready for august is completely and totally fine. IT'S NOT. bc this is what's going to happen... i'm going to wait all fucking summer for them to get their shit in order while begging the fucking landlord not to sell to anyone else THEN SUDDENLY "oh shit, i don't think i can go thru w this anymore... i think i'm just gonna dorm again, Shy lol :( i'm really sorry" and i swear to God i will lose my shit. like i don't understand what's the problem? living off campus is WAAAAAAAAAAAY cheaper and we're all grown ass adults? why do you wanna be under the thumb of a catholic school while paying for bad wifi, horrible food, and an even shittier living space? if they don't have the money to put up right now, then i get that, i'm broke too i'm literally using the leftover money i have from being abroad to operate until i start my job, but if that's the case THEN BE HONEST. JUST SAY YOU DONT HAVE THE MONEY AND WE CAN WORK OUT A SOLUTION instead of me looking like a fucking jackass whenever i ask the landlord to extend the deadline. everyone is being so fucking selfish/inconsiderate bc they can ultimately just fall back on campus housing, but i literally don't have my parents helping me anymore and i'm not taking out a huge ass loan my last year of college. this situation is annoying the fuck out of me, meanwhile THE SAME ANNOYING ASS PPL are calling/texting/FBing me wanting to talk about how amazing their summer is so far. WELL I CANT RELATE CAUSE YALL ARE ABOUT TO HAVE ME HOMELESS AS FUCK IN THE FALL. just leave me the fuck alone until you can pay your share of the deposit or fuck off. i don't want to talk about how much money you just blew at the club while i'm literally begging you to stop being a dumb bitch and pay your share of the deposit. jesus christ i hate people. like, i know the rest of you are spoiled fucking rotten and you don't give a shit about anything beyond the next two weeks and half, but don't tell me to "chill out" if your punk ass already has a fall back plan. this whole situation is a shitshow and it's making me even more angry bc the only reason we're IN this situation is bc of the same girl that everyone GUILT TRIPPED ME to share a room with. and i'm not even going to elaborate on how much EMOTIONAL AND PHYSICAL LABOR that's going to take; that's a whole 'nother 5pg rant that I don't feel like getting into. this is just the shittiest situation ever and i hate everyone involved and i wish they would stop spamming my fucking phone until they get their shit together bc rn i'm liable to ruin a friendship or two. or three.

[sonder-paradise]

Sgajsjdhsjajsjh I hc Dazai to be into rough fucking, nothing that would thoroughly hurt u (unless u're into that) but hard bondage, maybe shibari (?) While he pounds into you, mocking how utterly blissed out you look all tied up for him to ravish 👀

*deep inhale* 😳

Dazai adores tying you up. The way the ropes wrap and twist around your bare skin and restrain you. It’s an art in a way. Your pretty, supple body displayed in a rich entanglement of crimson red rope. It highlights your best features and what better way to appreciate his art than to put it to use. To watch you do nothing but struggle against the bindings, legs trembling and eyes watering as he roughly fucks into you. Legs spread and loosely bound by the knees. He relishes the fact that you can only moan out his name in a babbled trance while he gets lost in your tight heat. Arms happily tied with the sensual red rope and snaking around your pretty form. He degrades you while he fucks into you, muttering about how filthy you are all tied up and fucked out. How could you get out of this mess when you’re cock drunk on his dick?