#updating this to say i swing with my feet crossed for some reason lmao i just noticed this

[indecisive-dizzy]

guys I'm so strong and brave

(drove to the park instead of the doc office)

[munsonthings86]

Lust & Hatred- (Ethan Dolan x Reader) Pt. 3 *SMUT*

*OMG It’s been literal weeksss since I’ve worked on this but it’s here!!! I hope you guys enjoy it!! I LOVE YOU GUYS* LET ME KNOW IF THIS WAS WORTH THE WAIT, IDK

Warnings: Cursing, smut, and it took me a while to update this so I might be a little rustyyyyy, and I’m total ass at smut so....sorrryyyyy

Part 1   Part 2

Previously on Lust & Hatred…

With Ethan being so cold towards me for so long now, and me being as petty as I was, it made it incredibly difficult to be in the same room as him and not have either of us spark an argument.

“Oh, god. I had to deal with being around her all day, and now she’s staying over? For fucks sake, can I get a break from her?,” Ethan scoffed.

“What the hell is your problem? In case you don’t remember, we actually used to be good friends. What the hell happened to you? I don’t-.”

I’m cut off by two plump lips against mine, our lips moving in sync together.

“Ethan, I’m dating your brother,” I whisper. “That’s exactly the problem,” Ethan said, finally looking up at me for the first time since he kissed me. 

“I’ll show you what I mean,” Ethan said, grabbing me by my wrist and pulling me towards his bedroom, with a tight grip.

If Ethan had such uncharted bitterness towards me, why’d he have a picture of me and him, right by his bed?

Then, I introduced you to Grayson,” he pauses. “That was one of the biggest mistakes I’ve ever made in my life.”

Everything that Ethan has ever said to me, everything that he’s ever said about me, everything that he’s ever done to me, correlates to what he’s saying right now. This whole time, Ethan was jealous that Grayson was dating me, and he wasn’t.

“Ethan, if I’m being honest with you, I’ve always-,”

“What the hell is going on in here?,” Grayson asks, looking between us both.

“You had your chance with Y/N, the only person that’s ‘ruining your chances’ is you, Ethan. Just-,” before Grayson gets the chance to finish his statement, he is cut off, with a punch from Ethan.

Now on Lust & Hatred…(what is this? a show? lmao)

He swings, left and right, not a single one of his punches missing Grayson’s frame. I spring my body off of Ethan’s bed, the thought of how improper this whole situation was, being significant. I shove myself in between the two, attempting to put this whole brawl to a hold, at least.

“I CAN’T BELIEVE HOW IGNORANT YOU’RE BEING,” Ethan yelled, grabbing a hold of Grayson’s collar, shoving him against the wall. “Ignorant?! I can’t believe how delusional you’re being right now,” Grayson scoffed, trying his hardest within his ability to shake Ethan off of him. I couldn’t seem to fathom how this whole predicament commenced, just out of pure jealousy, and more importantly, me. If being out of both Ethan and Grayson’s lives, meant that whatever relationship they had left, could be restored, then that’s just what I had to do.

Sensing that my efforts to halt this sibling rivalry, was inevitably going nowhere, I felt myself being pushed over the edge. “WILL YOU TWO JUST CUT IT OUT?,” I ultimately shouted, recognizing that this fight was being dragged and carried, for far too long. Ethan dropped his hands from Grayson’s shirt collar, looking at the ground in obvious guilt. “Before I say something else that I might regret, I’m gonna go get some air,” Grayson announced, stretching his hand out toward mine, signalling for me to come along with him.

By unpopular decision, I concluded that I did have more to say to Ethan and that if anything was going to be resolved at all, all emotions and thoughts, had to be communicated. “I think I’m gonna sit here with Ethan, and make sure he don’t do anything reckless. But, I’ll see you later,” I told him, pushing my lips to the side to a split second, and shrugging my shoulders.

“So that’s it? You have one conversation with Ethan, whose been totally disgusting to you for the past few months, and then you just take his side like he’s your best friend?,” Grayson asked, baffled as to how I didn’t “side” with him even though it wasn’t the case. “It’s not like that, Grayson. It’s just- please, can we not do this right now?”

Grayson doesn’t even respond to my plead, but rather rolls his eyes and slams Ethan’s bedroom door shut leaving the both of us in an uncomfortable silence. Eventually, the front door is equally slammed shut, leaving the both of us in an uncomfortable silence, along with the silence of the rest of the apartment.

“You know, you didn’t finish what you were saying,” Ethan remembers, his voice cut through the long developed tension in the room. In complete and utter honesty, I was praying he’d forget I had said anything. The reason for me even almost admitting my true feelings, was just because I was in the heat of the moment, and anything that came to mind, sounded right.

Twiddling with my fingers, trying anything to distract of calm myself, I let out,“I was saying that, uh, I’ve always liked you too. But I never had the guts to tell you.” The floor must’ve became unbearably intriguing since I couldn’t bring myself to look any higher from there. Looking at the floor, I saw two feet stand before mine. I felt his hands make there way from my cheek to underneath my chin, lifting my head so that my eyes could meet his strong gaze. It didn’t take long for his eyes to drop down from my eyes down to my lips, before he asked, “Can I kiss you?” I thought about it. Trust me I did. Longer that I should’ve, considering I had a boyfriend. But no matter how much I feelings I had for Ethan, I couldn’t do that to Grayson. Even if I wanted to.

“Ethan-,”

“Please.” And that’s all he said. As a little girl, my parents always taught me that “please” was the magic word. It was as if that word really did become magic because as soon as that magic word left his lips, Grayson left my mind. I smashed my lips against his, shamefully loving the feeling of his plump lips one moving with mine. I felt like a criminal taking something that wasn’t mine, something that I wasn’t allowed to take. But another part of me didn’t care.

I felt his hands move from my cheeks down to my waist, placing them underneath my shirt. His kisses got sloppier, but still found a way to be perfect. His tongue glided across my bottom lip, craving for entrance to mine. I knew this wasn’t right. I just knew it. But once you cross a line, there’s just no going back. And according to what Ethan and I were doing, that line was crossed, miles ago. I opened my mouth just a little, and immediately, he drives his tongue in between my lips and our tongues dance against each other, fighting for the lead spot. All I could think about was how wrong this was, but how right it felt.

Ethan pulls me away from my thoughts as he earns the dominance between the two of us. He slowly pushes me down on the mattress behind us, and climbs on top of me, this time abandoning my lips, but now, resorting to my neck. He leaves a trail of wet kisses from the back of my ear down to my partially exposed chest. Ethan lifts his head up, and wraps his fingers around the hem of my shirt, his eyes pierced into mine, burning the memory into my mind. Though it was only a short moment, it felt like an eternity, the way he eyes created an illusion as if he was looking into my soul.

Without a look or a word of uncertainty from me, he takes it as a sign to keep his action rolling, so he peels my shirt off of my upper half, leaving me in my deep red lace bra. He bites his lip, almost admiring how I looked underneath him, between his legs. He rips his shirt off of his body, exposing his toned, muscular stomach. I trail my fingers down from his chest to his stomach, using my nails to slightly scratch him. My eyes fall a little past his belly button and to my attention, I notice Ethan’s bulge through his sweatpants become more of a boner, making the heat in the middle of my legs flourish.

He shocks me when he unbuttons my ripped jeans, and pulls it down to my ankles, with my underwear joining it, in one swift move, that felt like if I had blinked, I would have missed the occurrence. I was desperate for a little more dominance, or total dominance, for that matter. It was just my character.

I planted the palm of my hand against his strong chest as I slowly pressed him towards the other end of the bed, lifting myself on top of him, until I was straddling his waist. I tuck half of my bottom lip in between my teeth, understanding why Ethan enjoyed watching me under him, as I found it equally as enjoyable, seeing him. I pepper wet kisses from up his neck, down to stomach, stopping once I reached above the waistband of his sweatpants.

I steadily pull his pants down, bringing to my attention that he didn’t have on any underwear. I look up at him through my eyelashes, as I arrive at an area that I maybe shouldn’t be seeing. Ethan kicks the material off of his ankles, letting me look up and get a good look at his length. I swipe my tongue up against his erect length, batting my eyelashes. Before he gets the wrong idea, I announce, “I’m gonna make this quick before Grayson comes back.” He slightly pouts but, silently complies, by wrapping his fingertips around my hips, pulling my body above his crotch.

I grind my hips against Ethan’s own, feeling his length rub against my sensitive nub. Ethan lets out a low growl, from feeling my arousal coat his erection. He rubs light circles on my thighs, forcing me to let out an involuntary moan. Ethan snakes his hands up to my sides, then to my back to unhook my bra, freeing my breasts from the prison that was a bra. Apparently Ethan’s hands weren’t done with their journey, as he grasps his length and slowly guides it into my heat, the both of us moaning simultaneously at the contact.

Ethan thrusts his hips up to meet my entrance, not giving me time to adjust to his size, inside my core. I moan out loud, grinding my hips to give myself even more euphoria. Ethan continues to thrust up into me, using two of his fingers to rub my clit. Our moans become consistent, the both of up finding a steady rhythm. He uses his other hand to knead my left boob, sitting up to suck and nibble on the right one. I choke out a loud moan, closing my eyes, to help myself to engulf my mind into a state of pure pleasure and complete bliss.

I bounce my hips on Ethan’s own that are still pounding into mine, driving me dangerously close to my edge. I squeeze my eyes even tighter as Ethan applies more pressure with his fingers against my clit, as he edges me on saying,“Cum for me, baby,” over and over, like a mantra in my mind. I’m moaning uncontrollably, as I grab onto Ethan’s shoulders, and feel the knot in my stomach slowly, yet strangely strongly come undone. I feel Ethan’s warm juices spill into me, making me writhe from sensitivity on top of him.

Ethan tugs on my arms, pulling me down to lay on top of him, both of breathing heavy. Of course, doing what I did was wrong, extremely wrong. Completely disgusting and not okay. But what made it worse, was that I didn’t think about Grayson, not once. Not even for a second. But laying on Ethan and hearing his heart beat, being totally quiet, in a state of calmness, a state I haven’t seen him in, in a long time, it made me almost not care.

It was becoming way past my visiting time, though I was planning on staying over for the night, but with everything that’s happened, it’d be too uncomfortable and awkward. I sit up off of Ethan’s lap, whispering to him,“ I’m gonna go home, okay? Let me know how things go with Grayson.” He looks down, and slowly nods his heads, probably just realizing the horrible things we’ve just done to his twin brother.

I stretch my shirt over my chest, not bothering to put my bra back on. I feel Ethan’s stare burning into my side, but I try my best to ignore it, trying not to further dig myself into this hole of deceit, if that was even possible. I grab my bag, and wave goodbye to Ethan who now has on his sweatpants, waiting for me to finish getting ready.

I open the door, and what I see, is not something that I wanted, or thought I would see at all. Grayson, sitting on the couch facing the bedroom, looking as disappointed and heart broken as ever, not even daring to make eye contact with me or Ethan. Before I could open my mouth to get even a word out, he cuts before me.

“Before you go home, you need to choose one of us right this second or we’re done. It’s either me or him. There’s no way in hell, that you’re getting both,” he says, still not looking at either of us. At a loss for words, I look back at Ethan. who refuses to look at me. I furrow my eyebrows, coming to some sort of a realization. “Wait, you knew he was here. That’s why you look so fucking guilty,” I said getting angrier with each word escaped my lips. “You knew he was here, DIDN’T YOU?!” He slowly nods his head, confirming my theory.