#v. modern canon

[northliights]

@spynorth 

What do you get someone  for Christmas that's a little more hey, i like you and a little less I would cut out my heart this very second and lay it at your feet ... ? He's spent weeks agonizing over it, tossing aside decision after decision  - some for being too much, others for being too cheap. The thing he finally settles on leaves a weight in his middle and a lump of fear in the back of his throat and he'll never admit to how his hands shake wrapping it, but the torn paper on one edge and the sloppy knot of ribbon might give it away. When he places it in her hands, it's with a quick flash of a smile that’s belied by the shade of worry in stormy blue eyes.

No more lies, she had said. And he's done his best to follow that wish.

Under the wrapping paper (a simple forest green and gold thing) is an average sized sketch book, brown leather cover with a simple forest setting etched upon the cover. On the first page is a note of sorts, each letter crafted in a careful script as if the writer were hoping his message would stand the test of time. It reads:

Aurora,  I wanted to give you something that stood out from the rest, something as bright in a sea of gray as you are, but every bracelet and necklace seemed like something for any other woman in London. And you're not any other woman, at least not to me. I've spent the last few months trying to explain what you mean to me and I thought maybe this was a great way to try once more - a bit hard to stick my foot in my mouth with a pen isn't it? Though I'm sure I'll find a way. This book is my attempt at saying the things that always seem so impossible to get out without stumbling, the things that I've thought since the first time you've ever looked at me, the things that have nothing to do with how your lips feel against mine or the way I fall asleep at night thinking of you with my first thought in the morning being your name. This is my way of telling you that I see you, Aurora Phillips. I see your smile when you think no one's looking, that flash of vulnerability that you're afraid to show, the tenacity you put into your work... people make jokes about mi5 saving the world, but it's fighters like you that do the real work. The things in this book are what I love about you, what I've noticed from the very beginning, what I've come to learn about you and what I see in you every single day. They will stay true whether you put up with me for a thousand more years or kick me out of your life tomorrow. I hope you use this to remind yourself of the strength we all see when it feels like it’s all for nothing.                          Merry Christmas, pretty girl.                                                                        John  Lucas

The remaining pages are filled with various quotes from poems, literature, plays, famous movies and even some of her own headlines and bits of opinion pieces regarding her articles. Some have been cut and pasted, traced by colored pencil or thin markers to make them stand out while others are simply written in black ink or scrawled in a flourishing script of different colors to create a collage of quotes that still can't quite adequately describe what he thinks of her.

The package resting in her hands feels heavy, not just in physical weight but also with the weight of expectation, of the burden of some sort of deeper meaning that seems to linger upon Lucas’s expressive features as he waits silently for her to unwrap the gift. It makes her a little nervous, if she’s honest - their history has taught her to approach situations like this with caution, that danger can appear when you least expect it and strike like a viper at an exposed underbelly...but in this case the only danger is the potential breaking of a certain spy’s heart if her reaction to his gift is slightly less than what he’s hoping for, her praise not effusive enough to satisfy his need for reassurance. 

It’s a careful web she weaves, one built to protect his feelings from her own slightly less emotional self, knowing that her lack of outward display most certainly doesn’t indicate a lack of appreciation for the gift. 

Taking a deep breath, she begins to peel back the paper that conceals the gift from curious eyes, teeth biting at her bottom lip as the spine of a book is revealed. There are no words printed on it, no identifying marks, so she continues to pull at the wrapping paper until the beautifully crafted sketch book rests in her hands, a puzzling thing that has her raising her gaze to meet his with a question written there that she doesn’t voice aloud. His nod of encouragement is all it takes to get her to open the exquisitely designed cover, scanning the letter on the first page while her teeth sink with greater force into her lower lip, and after a moment she is forced to blink away the moisture that gathers in the corners of her eyes, threatening to spill over with each word that she reads.

The fight to keep her tears at bay is lost when she turns the pages, taking in what must have been hours - no, days of work, the search for clips and the careful transcription of the snippets of poetry and prose that he’s placed with the utmost care upon each page breaking through that wall she’d built long ago to protect her fragile heart, the obvious evidence of his love spelled out for her in a way that is both beautiful and undeniable. Trembling fingers trace over the pages as if they’re rare and precious things...and to her, they are. 

Finding her voice at last, Aurora looks up from the book, blinking away the blur of tears to focus on his features as he stands waiting for her judgment. “Lucas, I...” she gives a slow shake of her head, a smile breaking through the tears as she clutches the book to her chest. “No one has ever done anything like this for me before. I love it. I...” another pause, this time a thick swallow filling the empty space in her words before her soft voice rises once more. “I love you. Thank you.”

[northliights]

Outside the snow swirls and billows with the gusting wind that occasionally rattles the windowpanes, but inside the flat it’s cozy and comfortable, the soft amber of the lampshades casting a warm glow that makes their quiet conversation seem even more intimate. She’s seated on the couch, turned sideways with her feet resting in his lap while one of his hands is caught in hers, fingers intertwined where they lay joined on the blanket spread across both of their legs. Her gaze is soft as she studies him, the dim golden light framing his features, and without thinking about it she reaches out with her free hand to trail one fingertip down the sharp line of his nose, her eyes bright when they meet his.

“I know Lucas pretty well,” she murmurs, a crooked smile curving her lips in a way that is almost bashful. “But having just been introduced, I don’t know John very well at all.” Now she looks down at their joined hands, her thumb caressing his palm, hesitation finally making an appearance in an uncharacteristic display of uncertainty.

“Will you tell me about him?”

@spynorth didn’t ask for a thing but princess does what princess wants ;-)

[northliights]

LAYER 001 : THE OUTSIDE.

name : Aurora Phillips

eye colour : blue

hair style & colour : auburn, wavy/curly, usually falling well past her shoulders

height : 5′3″

clothing style : at home she’s fairly casual - jeans, sweaters or tank tops, sometimes a button-down she stole from Lucas that is ten times too big for her. she does enjoy dressing up to go out, and her one indulgence is the mile-high heels she favors whenever she can get away with them. at work she wears clothing that will help her blend in with whatever situation and location she finds herself, whether it’s an office building with its high-end professional attire (think three piece suits and pencil skirts) or more obscure locations with specific clothing requirements (nursing scrubs to slip into a hospital unnoticed, waitress uniform at a restaurant where an important meeting is taking place, that sort of thing) she tailors her wardrobe to suit the needs of her job. 

best physical feature : her eyes, though she believes her hair is a close second. 

LAYER 002 : THE INSIDE.

fears : being caged, smothered by other people’s expectations and demands

guilty pleasure : hour-long bubble baths

biggest pet peeve : ignorance

ambitions for the future : to make a name for herself. when daddy is a member of parliament, it’s difficult to build a reputation for yourself without people tying your success to your famous father. she despises him and goes out of her way to disavow any and all connection to him.

LAYER 003 : THOUGHTS.

first thoughts waking up : no.

what they think about most : once upon a time (no pun intended) her career had been the sole focus of her life. she worked 20 hour days and never stopped moving, always pushing for another story, another break, something to fill the empty spaces. but then she met Lucas. now she sleeps in (!!) on days off, and more often than not her thoughts seem to find their way to him even when she’s meant to be focusing on her work. 

what they think about before bed : Lucas. always Lucas.

what they think their best quality is :  intelligent

LAYER 004 : WHAT’S BETTER?

single or group dates : single.

to be loved or respected : both. she demands it.

beauty or brains : if forced to choose one, brains.

dogs or cats : cats. small, independent, and vicious if you piss them off. she can relate.

LAYER 005 : DO THEY …?

lie : she is honest almost to a fault, unless she’s going after info on a story. she doesn’t see that as lying, per se, but rather a form of acting. it helps her sleep at night.

believe in themselves : fiercely

believe in love : before? no. now? absolutely.

want someone : yes

LAYER 006 : HAVE THEY EVER …?

been on stage : yes. several times. buy her a drink and she might tell you about it.

changed who they were to fit in : in her professional life, almost daily. in her personal life? never.

LAYER 007 : FAVOURITES

favourite colour : purple

favourite animal : fox

favourite book :  the witching hour - anne rice

favourite game :  trivial pursuit

LAYER 008 : AGE

day their next birthday will be : february 4th, 2023

how old will they be : 29

LAYER 009 : FINISH THE SENTENCE

i love : Lucas.

i feel : content...for the first time in my life.

i hide : a great deal from nearly everyone. hazards of the job.

i miss : my mother.

i wish : I could stop time, make a moment last for a lifetime. 

tagged by : no one. i stole it fair and square.

tagging : @spynorth @piraticalwit @lokadottr @liarincommand @pyreshe @pizzatheif @scapedgrace @munstrum @fatecrafted @loetise @crimeloyalty​ @marblecarved @verreprincesse @ofhumanvoice​ @webreak (muse of your choice!) and anyone else who wants to do it!