#we'll have a ceremony and everything hahahaha

[formula-fun]

Ah! (lightbulb) we definitely have very different understandings of angst, or I was more thinking about relationship-wise because the current fic feels like the story of them coming together despite everything on themselves and between each other. And internal and external perception of gender roles, external expectations and judgment hahahaha is simply part of the “everything”. I definitely is not expecting fairytale happily ever after (not that my expectations should matter).

It’s not pretentious at all hahaha, maybe it’s just even though world-building is very important for me even in fanfic (I get stuck thinking about logistics a lot of the time) , I still looked past the heaviness of gender roles, expectations and judgement because it feels like something jumping on the back of their minds and the story constantly, but when I am way too focused on “how they are feeling” instead of “how they are going to make this work” it’s kind of shoved out the way.

Though now typing this out is really making it like I’m just ignoring the elephant in the room ha. I do really like the “huge fucking mess” though, besides the glorious horse metaphors, your way of writing and very smooth incorporation into personality and interactions make the underlying discussion so much more interesting. Like it’s a very important part of the story but not center-staged with neon flashing lights, instead has the constant lurking in the shadows air to it. It is technically heavy but both of them thrive on challenges don’t they!

Oh! Or maybe I have always associated the heaviness in the background for Max in the story with his father which is being counterproductive to him embracing himself, and Charles with embracing himself, this actually is the more specific version of “gender roles, expectations and judgement”.

Forgive me for thinking that even if the plot is trying to gender stereotypes into mush they could still get ostentatious diamond engagement rings hahahhahah, maybe it’s just me thinking this would be funny, especially during the time they would literally be facing media judgement about how the “omega wife” should be home with the child not out fucking f1 with his greatness. It could (or not) be in line with Charles change in dress style!

Sorry I pretty much just wrote down my very nonlinear thought process.

Happy Wednesday! (At least we are pull through half the week now right?)

Xxxxxxxxxooooooooooxxxxoo

Hi hi again!! mwah

Yeah I think that probably explains it!! i mean it'll probably all result in some tension in their relationship but you know...it'll be fine. idk. we'll have to wait and see!! once again i am answering your ask too early in the morning and dont have the braincells i am so sorry

i do completely get you about worldbuilding too, I tend to think about writing in a really mathematical/analytical way in terms of how people and relationships fit together so i know it's easy to get caught up in logistics!! theres a lot of worldbuilding cmoing up now for me as well though because the last chapter has to do with like how mating works vs how weddings work and things like that. like mating ceremonies were already mentioned and they're different than beta weddings, but im still working out what exactly they look like. Also how gender works for kids since gender and biological sex don't really have anything to do with each other in this universe? I think i've figured out what its going to be like but i dont know for sure yet. fun fun fun

but yeah anyway i like the way you put it because they themselves exist kind of in an internal relationship and that's where the story is being told, but everything else is an external pressure that's guiding them in certain ways or making them feel certain things. Without all of that they'd probably be fine, but there's a lot going on outside of just them and we're not so much seeing those things as we are seeing how it changes them as people. So 'how they're feeling' is really what the story is about, but it's all a direct result of those things that are lurking in the shadows.

and hashshahd i'll get back to you about diamond rings!! i guess it all depends on what exists in their bubble vs what exists in the external bubble!! at this point they're starting to prioritize only what makes them feel good and completely put aside things that please external forces (max finally told his dad he needed space, charles wants to court max, charles is exploring his own self-expression in ways that make him happy--all of these things directly contradict what other people expect or want from charles and max, but they're both doing them to make themselves feel happier or more secure, which in turn makes their relationship more secure), so going forward that will probably be what they continue to do. if they want to get beta married and throw a big celebration then they'll do it, but they probably won't do it just for the sake of appearances/to show off! it's more about doing what makes them happy

but also my brain was like melted the other day from this stupid academic paper about public vs private life and i think that is now unforutnately influencing this fic. the public/private life academic paper is an external pressure on my internal relationship with my own fic. this is why we cant have nice things

anyway sorry for this long ass answer, thank god its wednesday tho and i hope youre having a great week!!!! sorry if none of this makes any sense but please know i enjoy your questions so so so much <333