#we'll see if they last on the list but idc at this point

[seaside-lovers-archive]

eh screw it, im going to add talkshow bonnie + talkshow foxy as tertiary f/os. their individual tags:

🐰 Talkshow Bonnie / 🐰 some bunny loves you

👓 Talkshow Foxy / 👓 electrify my heart

[nono-uwu]

Ons chapter 135 thoughts!!

Spoilers duh (also very long post. Lmk if I should add the read more cut)

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- KAGAMI I DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAD IT IN YOU TO GIVE CHESS AND HORN MORE SCREENTIME BUT THANK YOU ANYWAYS

- I am so glad that the whole digestion thing is more symbolical bc... that inital wording really threw me off lmao

- on that note, the immagery of the dead trees with the bodies sticking out of 'em... very creepy and on point, I think it's neat

- they actually adressed Crowley forgetting them! Wowzers (side note she looks hella adorable. My little skrunkly)

- ouugh the dynamic... where was it earlier? It seems so much more casual than during the Nagoya arc (probably just wishful thinking on my part lmao)... idc how give us more of this

- "you two were my first servants", LORE CRUMBS! I guess.

- wait so, they're still becoming demons? But isn't that a form of reincarnation, the thing Ferid is specifically trying to stop? But he's also devouring them... to absorb their power I guess? Since later on Ferid mentions now being more powerful after devouring Crowley (I'll get to that asspull later)

- Also Horn looks a teensy bit weird with the new artstyle but she's still super pretty 🫶 be my wife pls

- So, 16 year old Ferid is inside himself as his 'true self'? I assume that because he got the idea to stop reincarnation when he was 16 and hasn't changed his mind since (never let 16 year olds make big decisions in this world, it only leads to disaster)

- the skrunkle part 2. Also I doubt being digested like that feels good in any way. And with how slow it's supposed to be, yikes.

- I have a theory (aka major amounts of copium): Yuu will bust in and save Crowley because of 'fAmiLy' and also save Chess and Horn since they're family by association

- No one can reach Ferid, eh? And then Corwley's voice reaches him. Kagami and his queerbaiting amirite

- However Ferid then snags Crowley and ig he's on the priority list of getting devoured. Probably bc he's the strongest vampire Ferid has eaten. Cannibalism as a metaphor for love and devotion or whatever, except it's very literal and I doubt there's any love beyond 'u and interesting critter dude' from both sides

- Ok here's my major nitpick with this chapter: KAGAMI STOP BREAKING AND BENDING YOUR OWN FUCKING WORLDBUILDING AND POWER SYTEMS. Until now it was established that a vampires strenght is dependant on 1. their rank (as in who's blood turned them) and 2. their age. But now appearantly Ferid can eat vampires and absorb their strenght? If this was some universal but very difficult thing for any vampire to do, then I wouldn't be this salty. Also one of my favourite things about Ferid as an antagonist was, that power-wise he was on the weaker side. Despite being 'weak' he was still a major threat. He made up for his lack in actual fighting power with smarts and immaculate planning. But now he's another uber-strong genius. C'mon we already had Shikama and Rigr for that department. Bleh.

- now for the Yuu / Rigr and co confrontation, it's fiiiiine. I guess. At least Shikama is still somewhat of a formidable threat. Not to the major characters obviously but yk, it's something.

- rip Basteya. You showed up, slayed for a little and died.

- Kirsten still looks fugly as hell lmao

- so do Ulrich and Roger

- So, who will be faster: Shinoa in absorbing Shikama or Yuu in saving him? My bet is on Yuu purley bc he's supposed to be the main character but ig we'll see next chapter

- KRUL!!! AND THE BAT THING I FORGOT IT'S NAME

- sadly no Ferid / Krul brawl this chapter but yk what makes me excited for next chapter

- my guess is that now Krul is Ferids next target to be chomped. Hopefully she will beat his ass. Like when she first appeared. Ahhh the good old times

- 'A big fan of yours... M'lady Queen' lmao. What's next Ferid, will you put on a Fedora? Bro that last panel ain't it. Fuckin Sebastian of black butler wannabe 💀

[skinni-girls-eat-books]

Monday, January 1st, 2024!

10:29am We are alive mf's!!! We made it to the new year!

Currently having my semi-annual financial hoopla but things will work themselves out 😇

January goals: not spending money basically.

- don't get so drunk, it is not fun anymore!

- stop buying food/ drinks out! Too much $

- look for free activities

- free hobbies

- be mindful of what you're doing! And not doing!

- wake up earlier and go to bed earlier! (Gradual)

1:01pm I have already caved and have gotten PDQ 🤣 it's all good I'm straight chilling ❤️ Stay positive y'all. Watching A Historia Delas on Hulu, looks pretty good!

3:45pm Ok so PDQ has made me completely lethargic, the salt has made me totally bloated AF like I feel it in my belly and my feet and hands. I want to work on increasing my energy levels this year and omg this was not the right thing to do. I'm so bloated I'm too uncomfortable to nap even. This show is very good though thank god bc I'm clearly not doing much else today.

Also, one of my wall adjacent neighbors has been playing freaking dubstep or something for like 2 hrs straight and I just realized it's making my brain feel weird/ fuzzy but I couldn't identify why tf I felt that way before. There's so much damn noise in the world it's no wonder everyone is losing their mind/ irritable and slightly annoyed all the time.

8:04pm I did my nails! Also binge watching this show was a very good decision, the best I've made all day 🤣 Tried eating some cheese and it's too much!! My body is just rejecting all of this rich af holiday food and I should really clean out the fridge tomorrow and start fresh. I know it's a waste but idc I don't want to keep feeling like crap and I hate expired food. It's not my fault I went on vacation for like 10 days and all this was too much. I'm still not used to buying/ cooking food for one person. I need to stop buying gallons of milk ffs! It's way too much I had to have like 4 cups last night bc it was expiring today. This is just all part of being mindful, everything is a learning process! You are ok and you are doing great! ❤️

Also, learning more and more about how abusive my relationship is and I'm so glad the internet exists because it would have been so easy to just *not* be aware of this experience that i unfortunately share with many people!! Narcissistic abuse is real and I am ready to keep healing!! Can't fool me twice.

I loved talking to his grandmother though, she is so wise and sweet and I love that she really doesn't play his BS and can see through it, amen!!! I can't believe she said what I thought she would say.... She wants them to move out together so that they'll break up already!!!! That shit is crazy she really said that!!! I may be young but I am not stupid and I saw that shit coming from MILES away literally.

9:41pm He keeps randomly texting me and tbh at this point it's so crystal clear what he's doing and it's pathetic. Simply I have no admiration for him, no respect above human decency really, it's just pathetic is the only word for it. He clearly needs psychological help, and I'm not a psychologist! Also, don't you have a gf to text who literally hates me? Get it together, bro, you're not fooling anyone (except her?? Poor girl tbh she's really getting her payback/ karma in spades I'm sure) thanks universe :) love ya.

PS why does he keep bringing up the music thing?? Does he have no other lines I don't really get it. What tf am I supposed to do about that anyway. I listen to all of his music and my music just fine (oh wait it's because I took time to heal and didn't jump into another toxic relationship 7 days later!!) Get a grip, dude, you're not getting anyone's sympathy here.

Made a to do list for tomorrow so we'll see how that goes! Also I'm sleeping naked so we're trying lots of new things!

[pokefanbri]

https://www.facebook.com/104057744428568/posts/156998459134496/?sfnsn=mo&d=n&vh=e

Fucking told him its a huge red flag if someone doesn't get rid of their apps. Multiple apps. Smh 😠 "oh yea i don't use them anymore" proceeds to use fb dating app" for real come on bro!

Some comments of the post:

"If you have to be checking up on your Partner then you shouldn't be with that person.. Idk how people have time for all this .. love yourself and know your worth.."

"If you're in a serious committed exclusive relationship you should not be on tinder. That's how I met my fiance and as soon as we said we are gf and bf and exclusive we both deleted it. Honestly if I was her I would have broken up with him too"

"a person also has a right to trust their gut feeling and check things out if something's not feeling right. Knowledge is power"

I've already discussed this but this news clip further validates my point of the topic, nothing more. I could call him out on hs bs further with detail, but I won't....yet, out of respect even though he probably doesn't deserve it. Til he reaches me & apologizes for everything he's done, i can say whatever tf I want & i could make a whole damn list.

Its the events of this what happened that started our downfall to begin with cuz i didn't trust him & he didn't even try to gain it back just left it as is when I could've turned my back right then & there, no apology either. Didnt apologize much actually, not even when i last saw him. But from then we spiraled & he got bored of me. I wasn't giving him what he wanted in whatever way & he wanted to find more. Closed himself off from the beginning & that created his boredom 😒

Would've had a blast together like a normal fucking couple if he was less closed off, & wouldn't have felt the need to do shit behind my back.

I'll stop talking about it for now, I have the anger & urge to keep going but I wont...actually no Screw it im pissed 😡 but ill keep it light. Its just not fair, I did so much for him but I was disrespected in different aspects of the whole relationship. Fuck! I've talked about the positives alot cuz i do love him..but the negatives are such bs too.

I want a good ass sincere apology for all of it so I can forgive him & move on, ive already apologized myself even though I dont think I should have to 😒. Didnt even give me a straight answer for the breakup, it was always a different excuse when I know he just wanted to pursue other women without me around im not fucking stupid. His own toxicity was too much even for himself & I was in the line of fire, to where i was the toxic one? No fuck that its unacceptable, he always lied when it came to covering his own ass.

For all i know he's watching me squirm & taking pleasure in all the pain I'm going through over him cuz he likes the attention. But no I actually don't think so on that one he's still good & ill give him credit where its due. But I gave him all the attention he wanted/needed & still wanted more from someone else. Really dude fucking really!?

Man up & own up to your mistakes, speak to me where I can actually hear ur voice speaking back to me with sincerity. We'll apologize together. Yea ull be pissed about this, but after u get over it & calm down. Give in & call me, granted when ur ready, & open up for once in your damn reserved life. Itll help us both with more closure & may even take a weight off our shoulders if we just talk it out, no arguing...since we're done there's no point anyway..a friendly non judgment zone cuz idc, i won't think of u any less.

U confused me during & especially after the relationship cuz i didnt know who u really were, i know the good cuz that's what u allowed me to see, ive accepted the bad that I knew already & from what ive learned...i accepted u regardless.

I always forgave u & not cuz im passive, cuz forgiveness is what the Bible teaches.. ive forgiven u & myself the best i could especially with the last things ive showed u, (accept this part cuz im pissed rn & standing up for myself, ill delete eventually maybe if u ask cuz nobody wants to be seen any less of a person. but I can make it alot worse, calling me the mistake was the worst thing u ever said to me & pointing out your faults so u can be better throughout the relationship was my only toxicity to u) we actually never really fought except the 1 time, just argued a tiny bit rarely about little things.

Ive tried using every ounce of my courage to show u how much im sorry for any wrong ive done. but its up to u now to make things right. U know me, ive always said that u can talk to me about anything. I want to be able to trust again & move on whilst staying friends. What else do u have to lose, might even have a great heart to heart convo dude to dudet

Everything ive ever said up to this point lies all my Questions. But here's most of the list, we both were equally in control of the relationship. Maybe u didn't want me to? But doing everything I had to for myself & the household, what u & ur parents wanted of me & just me being me cuz i had to, u had your own part to play & did provide...but did u actually not want me to cater to u if it were a sign u were lazy or something? Like did u not feel worthy of me? What is it u think is my "addicting personality" that isn't fixable on the surface? What is it really that u didnt like about me? This is why i don't have closure, u left me like this, confused as well as wanting more since u held back so much. Was that on purpose to give me even more false hope & want me to pine over u? Did u ever or do u still, love me at all? What did u want from me & out of the relationship, what was the purpose of it from ur perspective & why do u think i couldn't give that to u? What did i lack that u felt compelled to not tell me so I could improve & vise versa so we both could improve? Why wouldn't u allow me to help u become a better man when (I shouldnt have to btw), its exactly what u wanted but maybe didnt see it? Do u realize your own faults even as u do them? Lol. Like i genuinely want to know as much as the good ive seen, cuz to be better the more open of a person u are the more u understand yourself too.

Unless claiming u want to be a better man is part of ur alluring charm in love bombing process to land a caring girl on purpose lol...god I hope not, that would just mean u rinse & repeat like a for real narcissist 🤔 seriously tho look into that im not even kidding, im asking cuz i care. Im pissed now but 1 thing is that im trying to not put ur behavior against u cuz maybe u can't help it, its just the way u are, all ive seen & experienced points to maybe 50% of u lol. Ive always suspected narcissism, a real psych problem that might be worth looking into. But yea 1 of the reasons especially why im so forgiving & trying not to put it against u, why i still care despite u being a dick lol. I chose to look past it, all the time & up to now cuz I understand what its like to have psychological ailments. The worst part about it is most dont realize it, so i encourage u to do some research & self reflection & admitting it to urself are the 1st steps. Okay? There's different kinds & levels to being 1 too, i found that fascinating. bryan is definitely a different type, ur more lighter than that...definitely not the worst which is the physical harm type. Trust me its worth finding out more about yourself, just dont use it to ur advantage in a bad way but i trust u to do right & grow. Not sure a discarded supply (ie me) has ever tried telling a narcy what they might be for the benefit of their own self awareness 🤔,idk if its ever been done, but theres a 1st for everything? U can find alot on it in quora digest alone but Google is also ur friend.

You always were worth every effort of mine to help u in any way to be happy, & i was most happy when u were. U mean alot to me still, its the effect u had on me, I was under ur spell lol its hard to rid myself of it still, not sure when it'll pass. I chose to see it as a gift rather than a curse, that ur effect on me is still so strong when I shouldn't give a damn. If u really are a narcy, then I understand & don't put alot against u cuz its just the way u are & i need to accept it, but if it somehow helps u to help yourself cuz of it, then whats the harm? But, even in doing this or having my socials public for u...maybe just feeds into what u want...i still dont care, I want u to see how bad or good im doing without u in my life, so u know im okay at least. U promised friendship, least I can do is allow u to keep tabs on me too we spoke of, on my end of things.

The 18th of June was the last time i saw u. It'll soon be a month ago in about a week & a 1/2 & your birthday would mark 2 months. Cant believe we couldn't even last through to that 😔

Mark my words playa I will be contacting u on that day lol. Can't ghost your homie forever sweetie

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Tommy

Ali: yo yo yo Ali: i'm back to civilization, using the term loosely there but Ali: what i miss Tommy: hey girl hey Tommy: oh you know several family feuds Tommy: standard Ali: oh the joys Ali: reckon i'm right on time for the next one Ali: soz I didn't have signal, what you want me to do lads Tommy: reckon you have a fair point Tommy: and solid excuse Tommy: if I had someone to do, my phone would be off too, like Ali: i've made the case for not spoiling the areas natural beauty with phone masts but appaz 'not the fucking point' Ali: no chance of getting away with that, city boy Ali: gutted x2 Ali: should be jelly though 'cos 😍 Tommy: Oh honey I am Tommy: Sickeningly so Tommy: much like your socials of late Ali: Haha piss off Ali: its the honeymoon phase Ali: and you can't act like you'd rather witness the death rattle of my last playing out like Tommy: Well yeah, never a more legit word spoken Tommy: Poor Marls Tommy: Bet she took to the heartbreak like a duck to water though Tommy: as for you and Carls, you've been in that phase for bloody ages Ali: I know, I'm evil Ali: not her first, or last, which says it all Ali: Not even Ali: anyway, gotta milk it, you'll see when you're being gross yourself Tommy: Not evil just scandalous Tommy: We've all had our heads turned by the straights Tommy: Can't pretend I'm not thrilled that you got kissed instead of your head kicked in, love that you got lucky there Tommy: Yeah even, you too been circling and flirting since the dawn of summer if not time Tommy: I think not. I'm nothing but fab in all things Ali: More Marilyn than Hitler Ali: one for the bio, thanks Ali: Ha, laughable, no one is immune to my charms also I do the kicking so Ali: coming up roses forever baby bro Ali: Exactly 😏 gonna be vomit-inducing 'cos you're gonna be thinking yours is the greatest love story ever told 🙄😉 Tommy: stick it on your tinder when the honeymoon's over kid Tommy: welcome welcome Tommy: And Marls thought she was so tough. Not immune to a curb stomp were you, babe Tommy: roses are cliche as hell so agreed Tommy: could be, sister, could just be Tommy: surrounded by sapphic role models in you and your boo Ali: could do it now Ali: sooooooo modern like that, darling Ali: omg shut up 😞 didn't mean to and not funny Ali: psh, as if you wouldn't be buzzing your tits off if someone got you roses Ali: umm not telling you you're doing this whole 'gay' thing wrong but you know the girl ones aren't for you, yeah? 😂 Tommy: yeah but will ya or are you too 😍 Tommy: real question is, has Carls taken to her new status like a duck to water or more like water off a duck's arse Tommy: calm down dear I won't mention the ex again, scout's honor Tommy: atm my tits would be pleased if anyone looked their way at all but we ain't on my sob story, here for your love Tommy: 😂 well now it makes sense Ali: only just got back, like Ali: can deffo take a day of recuperation Ali: not asked tbf Ali: i don't need a label on her or what we're doing Ali: poor baby 😥 Ali: wish you'd let me look at your profiles, pimp em up pimp you out Tommy: but she's still 😍 too, yeah? Tommy: not scared her off like Tommy: Oi! Take your own advice and take a day off Tommy: You can come when I hit the town if you're wanting to wingwoman that bad Ali: Oi yourself! Ali: Scared her off indeed Ali: trusted me enough to go into the wilderness alone like Ali: duh Ali: not even a question Ali: though really need to find you a lad there as well Ali: but you can have a hometown holiday romance, special enough for ya snowflake? Tommy: Probs just wanted to stretch. Caravans are well cramped Tommy: Piss off Tommy: You just don't want me third wheeling you and your girl 'cause you reckon I'll make it awks when she finds me more fun to dance with than you Tommy: Gotta take her and get her initiated though 🌈 Ali: yeah a 2 man tents well better Ali: melt 🖕 Ali: oh you gonna steal my girl? okay 😂 Tommy: You trying to say you didn't look at the stars? Get to fuck you lying scrag 😂 Tommy: Could do, she is cute Ali: Am I that predictable? Sigh Ali: Might be modern but draw the line at family 3way Ali: if anything, a step back Tommy: You ain't invited, honey Tommy: Full offense Ali: Finders keepers I saw her first bitch Tommy: Only 'cause I was miles away Tommy: play fair you dirty bisexual Ali: When you get a mans Imma call bagsy then Ali: wanna talk fair Tommy: we'll both be in wheelchairs minus our own teeth by then so I'll race ya Ali: 😏 oh hush Ali: secretly getting all the d and keeping it dl Tommy: 😂 Tommy: I wish Ali: 👀 Tommy: You filthy perv Ali: how did you know Tommy: Carls told us Tommy: we're that close now like Ali: well, that's a stop coming onto me if I've ever heard one 😂 good one, babe Tommy: 😂 Tommy: Get a lot of that, does she? awks Ali: You said yourself, she cute Tommy: Gotta do some kicking, kitten. Have you learned nothing from your previous? Tommy: 🥊 Ali: how not to keep a woman? Ali: harsh but Tommy: legit Tommy: fuckboy free inbox though Ali: yeah Ali: got their uses though, ain't they Ali: don't be too picky like Tommy: Not for me but you do you, darling Ali: 🤷 Tommy: with your luck they'd fall for you anyway tbf Ali: Like you don't remember having to hold Ma back Ali: weren't that long ago Tommy: Blocked that shit way out Ali: those were the days tho Ali: but fine, won't invite ronan to the gay club Ali: imagine Tommy: For you. Aged ma + 25 Tommy: poor bitch Tommy: Probs had to get her roots done Tommy: Which one was he again? The curly haired gypsy Ali: s'alright, marlene still fancied her and carly also said she would Ali: not doing bad old girl Ali: one of Ali: first and worst, some would say Tommy: OMHG REALLY Tommy: get it ma Tommy: oh that cunt Tommy: hit it Celine 'cause it's all coming back to me now Ali: yeah Ali: smug bitch Ali: no one in this family can keep it to themselves, apparently Ali: 😂 mhmm Ali: lives where Carly does, and was kinda her boyf when I met her Ali: official, like Tommy: reckon I'll steal your girls it's that saucy mare you gotta watch Tommy: Disgusting Tommy: You two fucking by association before you got near Tommy: That's some funny shit Ali: Real talk Ali: someone warn Da Ali: not me 'cos awks when I'm fuming at her for running off with my woman Ali: oh honey you don't even know Ali: we have a list Tommy: On it Tommy: Love getting shot in the face myself so I'm well keen to twirl past with that message Tommy: 😂 Tommy: How long a list we talking? Ali: Interpretive dance it out for him Ali: the most vague form of communication Ali: You actually wanna know or? Tommy: I'll get workshopping rn 'cause ma ain't go no chill Tommy: she won't wait and we know it Tommy: You tell me, sister, do I or not Ali: She's a busy woman Ali: if Rock didn't look so much like Da's side I'd question it frankly Ali: You know how I roll, scandalous from the womb to the tomb baby Tommy: When the adoption jokes ain't just craic Tommy: ooops Tommy: that's why we're the irish twins 'cause same girl same Ali: She's got some nerve, us all out here raising the devil child Ali: give him to his real daddy the inn is full bitch Tommy: 😂 Tommy: puts him in the postie's bag like back you go lad Tommy: he's kinda fit bet ma would Ali: oh babe Ali: hate to bring this bad news to you but he left Ali: probs got a modelling contract, eh 😏 Tommy: 💔 Tommy: pissed on my parade proper there Ali: i am so soz Ali: maybe i traumatized him Ali: okay you can get with carly once but that's it, then we're even Tommy: Not gonna ask what you let him see Tommy: between you and JC every sunday Tommy: 🎉 Yes Ali: knock on my door son, gonna get what i give you Tommy: 👏 Ali: idc if you're just trying to bring the bills, SIR Ali: we don't want 'em Ali: liverpool days got us all forever scarred Tommy: Too real to deal Ali: when you back fr though Tommy: Patience 🦗 Tommy: I got scholarship stresses Ali: must suck being talented enough for one, like 😉 Tommy: Says the genius Tommy: what's your IQ again? Ali: check the tinder lad Ali: put that on there too, how i get all the ladies Tommy: 😂

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: When your sidechick gotta go though 🙄 Carly: for serious or Ali: Probably not but she's raging and I'm more over it than usual Carly: sorry Carly: you're welcome over here Carly: marital home Ali: *checks in to be petty* Ali: don't even be, it ain't your fault remotely Carly: not trying to be helpful to her tho Carly: no offense Carly: you're mine so Ali: She wouldn't for you so no one can chat shit Ali: Why's everything gotta be so heavy, like? Ali: Already wifey'd up, soz about it Carly: i hear that no guesses on who i cleared out earlier Carly: idc if you wanna fuck rough but get a bit creative w the dialogue Carly: calling me a whore again like you forgot my name boo Ali: Eurgh, what a prick Ali: He definitely did not pass English lit Ali: Hope you returned the favour and kept calling him the wrong name Ali: Not gotta be mine but 😏 Carly: kept it silent that pisses him off more Carly: & blates wants me to lie there and take it until i do then hes sad over not being gods gift Carly: bored Ali: Make up your mind, like Ali: Can't please some people, eh Ali: so why bother, that's what I'm thinking Carly: yea Carly: lets do something not boring Carly: please ourselves Ali: Like the sound of that Ali: any ideas? i dunno if there's even a shit party on tonight Carly: be fun Carly: we can throw one Ali: hostess with the mostest Ali: why not, all welcome except the shit list Carly: is your gf on it Ali: Hmm, an invite would probably piss her off more but she'd not show Ali: too proud Ali: idc if I'm being real Ali: wanna have fun Carly: k Carly: im good for that Carly: ill get stocked wanna come or we doing this on trust? Ali: trust you with my last name, bitch Ali: but also doing fuck all so i'll come Ali: be 💪 Carly: come help me spend the week worth of food money my ma and da trusted me w in one night Carly: like its hard Carly: & my first time Ali: 😂 Ali: long as you got enough pot noodles in, you'll survive Ali: I'll bring you care parcels like the domestic goddess I is Carly: yogurt and strawberry shakes Carly: how i gonna keep my figure for you bitch Ali: 🍓 shortcake's what I'm gonna call you Ali: step up from whore, nah? Carly: aww Carly: what you want your wife to be wearing idk Carly: red & green or Ali: Good point, let's be really lame and couply and coordinate Ali: we'll stop at mine and look at options Carly: k Carly: better wash my hair brb Ali: take ur time, princess Carly: you sweetie Carly: caravan park royalty be like Ali: that how it be when you 👑 Ali: don't matter where you are Ali: I should shower too, smelling like coffee is my signature scent these days but not the goal Carly: blushing again right here Carly: too nice to & for me, babe Ali: nah, you just not been treated right Ali: get used to it, baby Carly: as soon as i do you'll do one Carly: i know the drill k Carly: divorce rates b high Ali: you wish it was that easy to get rid Ali: so stuck soz 💋 Carly: it is Carly: my da's my step Carly: fuck knows where the real is Ali: you wanna know? dead nosy, and my Ma's social, I can probs snoop Ali: not only nosy but persistent, trust, I ain't going nowhere, bitch Carly: shit bitch if your ma's social we can't be married Carly: 💔 Ali: 😣 BUT BUT Ali: she's always doing this, fucking cockblock Carly: yea Carly: mine hasnt noticed we're married Carly: cheapskate on the gifts like Ali: Inadvertently paying for the party favours tho, that's something Carly: only cuz im a fun wife Carly: yous the domestic one Ali: I'M FUN Ali: I'm a cool mom, fuck you 😣 Ali: we can't argue yet, wait 'til companies here, make a scene 😏 Carly: point Carly: kiss & make up Ali: fucking straight girls man 😂 Ali: i know you'd only lemme hit that if ronan was watching babe Carly: youd still have no complaints Carly: how many girls have you been with? ive got 3 or 4 under my belt Ali: 🤷 never said i was opposed to a lil performance art Ali: not wasting my talents on him tho, no offense Ali: Only been out with Lene but I've messed around with about as many as you, nothing serious, just fun at parties and that Carly: k you wanna put on a show for her Carly: lets do it Ali: 😂 God no! Ali: At least Ronan would be vaguely appreciative Ali: Not how I'm getting back in her good books Carly: but you dont care yea Carly: we'll find someone else Carly: impress them Ali: Yeah, see if any rides show up Carly: lads kno im good for a party Carly: they'll show Ali: 🙌 Carly: cant offer any girls as a promise Carly: you 50/50 or? Ali: Yeah, pretty much Ali: I'm not fussed, hot is hot to me Carly: k Carly: im scrolling Carly: wife duties Ali: just don't be swiping right on my behalf, babe Ali: focus on getting you a fittie Carly: cba Carly: wanna have fun w my woman Ali: now who's being sweet Ali: fun we shall have Carly: meet at the shop? Carly: less of a mess now Ali: ✌ see you there Carly: k Carly: be fun Ali: be fun babe 💚

[punkscowardschampions]

Carly & Ali

Carly: last nite was good of you Carly: saying thanks cuz i read my text from last nite & it was Carly: I cudnt read it k thats facts Ali: nah, don't mention it, no bitch left behind Ali: plus, I know the cunt doing the ditching, been there, like Ali: was trying to translate but yeah, you were pretty fucked 😂 Ali: how you feeling this am? 💚 Carly: yea? hes not that bad Carly: im a slag like he said tbh Carly: feeling like i had a decent nite all things considered Carly: you? Ali: Gurl, yes he is and no you ain't! Ali: Probably Ali: Who cares if you are, he is, and the rest Ali: I dated him for a bit, so there's no shady, tryna steal your man on the sly going on, don't worry Ali: much the same, my head feels like someone took my eyes out and shoved 'em up my arse, you know? Ali: standard sunday vibes Carly: aw you're sweet but it's no diss on me Carly: like ive cheated on him a few times Carly: but he does it too you're right w that Carly: hes a good fuck when he's not too wasted tho which you kno if you got it too Carly: you're single now tho? Carly: can have him back if you want Ali: Fair play Ali: why not call it open and call it a day? Ali: Probs 'cos he likes fighting as much as he likes fucking Ali: Meh, yeah, was passable, gotta have some reason to keep him around, like Ali: Nah, going out with the girl that drove us back Ali: Remember? Dark hair, angry Carly: yea Carly: you know Carly: shit my bad Carly: she was scary is what i've got in my head Carly: idk my head is sketch cant trust it Ali: That's a fair assessment, I reckon Ali: She wouldn't hate it either so you good 😉 Carly: pretty tho Carly: call it a trade up Ali: Yeah, she's cute Ali: you need any more of the night filling in lemme know, I'll do my best Ali: it was pretty standard though, nothing too wild Carly: no faking it w her cuz shes too drunk Carly: designated driver be like Carly: last i see i was getting with his friend lowkey and he went off about it im blank from then Ali: its a fucking gay crime to ever fake it, no matter what Ali: I can get behind that one tho, not got the time or energy tbh Ali: yeah i think him and his friend then got in a scrap and then they left Ali: bros before hoes mentality hardcore, like idk, have fun jerking each other off then, if that's ur vibe boys Carly: k that sounds legit from what i caught on his socials Carly: didnt upload the circle jerk bless Carly: gay crimes must of been committed Ali: sad face Ali: coulda spat on his back Ali: protip Carly: ill let him know when he texts me later Carly: how did you kno where i live? state of me Carly: sorry to drag you this way Ali: plottwist, i'm a massive stalker with bad intentions Ali: I truly don't know, but I'll tell Lene she should be a cabbie 'cos she managed and I don't think we got any puke in her car Carly: k big lesbian crush on me yea Carly: ioher lots Carly: stealing her girl and wrecking her car in one Ali: Naturally, you cute Ali: I'll give you her number if you like, or just pass along the thanks and soz Carly: awh you're cuter Carly: probs still drunk tho Carly: giving me those kind words Carly: you handle the now ex if you love me Ali: Hahaha, he'd LOVE that Ali: ghosts of gf past Ali: Let me and I'll love you forever Carly: go for it Ali: let's see if I've still got his number Ali: this contact list is a minefield of mistakes but the real embarrassment would be getting them muddled up, fo'shame! Carly: i can give it Carly: used it more recently than you Carly: up there at my top Ali: won't be tellin' him that Ali: don't need the ego boost Ali: but tah Carly: makes it more fun to fuck him over if you praise him first Carly: but maybe thats me Ali: like a shit sandwich Ali: I get it Carly: hungry for anything but that rn Carly: [Sends the number tho] Ali: wanna come for brunch Ali: now you are newly gay Ali: that's what they do, fucking sex in the city up in dis bitch Carly: yea? weird Carly: not what i thought Carly: awh first date tho Ali: forreal, even the butch ones, don't let 'em fool you, its all fancy fucking eggs and screwdrivers by 11am Ali: you call 'em mimosas tho, gotta pretend you're being classy Carly: wtf is a screwdriver Ali: Babe! Ali: Vodka and orange juice Carly: i call it that Carly: gays and their labels Ali: save it for the rant sesh honey Ali: love you talking about how men ain't shit as well Carly: thats the ones i fuck Carly: cant be bringing no poshos to a caravan Ali: Posh boys are only good for the money anyway, I'm sure Ali: not finding any in 24 like regardless Carly: not gonna find out if they do drive by now im a lesbian wife Carly: sorry lads Ali: they had their chance Ali: unlucky boys Carly: should prob tell me your name again if im taking it Ali: Ruins the mystery a bit but alright Ali: Its Ali Ali: Ali McKenna if we're being formal Carly: k you've got the hot brothers Carly: makes sense Ali: 🤔 Ali: I think you're thinking of someone else, babe Carly: not trying to have our first fight but you coulda told me before we got hitched, bitch Carly: you're still hot tho don't be sad Ali: so you could run off with one of my brothers? i think not Ali: unless you meant Tommy 'cos he's very single but that's unlikely because he's never here Ali: stuck with me for now, hoe 😘 Carly: a slag like me could do worse Carly: has Ali: bitch, same Ali: we can compare notes, see how many regrets we got in common Carly: yea Carly: doing it Ali: Good, save it for brunch 'cos I'm coming forreal Ali: we don't have to deal with a gaggle of gossiping gays tho, bring you a maccies breakfast? Carly: k Carly: be fun Carly: you are from what i remember Ali: I like that Ali: No bullshit Ali: Imma start all interactions like be fun please or I'm out Ali: ✌ bringing the fun and the bacon babe Carly: you're not bringing your gf are you Ali: Nah, how awkward, meet the missus, honey Carly: like there's usually a lad in my trio sorry Carly: still learning this lesbian life Ali: oh, are you bi legit? Ali: she's way too jealous for threesomes, you're good Carly: nah i just know what lads want Ali: Oh gurl Ali: that's why Lene ain't coming Ali: the lecture you're avoiding Carly: idc Carly: youre my wife now bitch Ali: 💍💍 Ali: Productive morning, if I do say so myself Ali: and we're hanging, fuck with us Carly: good influence of you cuz i havent done fuck all this week Ali: Hard work being a bi icon, babe Ali: wait 'til I get you on the yoga hype Carly: wtf Carly: is that a joke Ali: nah, I've already done half an hour this morning Carly: bitch i had my fingers crossed you mistyped yogurt Carly: i love you but its a no Ali: 😂 lets be really into yogurt, not fancy stuff, like fucking froobs Carly: phallic Carly: slurping on my dick shaped yogurt Ali: exactly Ali: what do men love more than a representation of their genitals shoved in your mouth? nothing, is the answer, bar the real thing Ali: so seductive Carly: they don't like food in bed tho, but maybe thats my technique Carly: thinking you could use whatever Carly: k just gonna dump this curry out yea bear with Ali: spicy Ali: imagine the yeast infection you'd get from a fromage frais Carly: like sorry but if i can handle cum in my eye you can deal with some saag aloo boy Carly: googling those symptoms would be a laff tho Ali: ugh, now i want indian Carly: date 2, babe Ali: 😍 Ali: this is all moving so fast Ali: 'bout it Carly: thats all i kno about lesbians k Ali: Its so true Ali: Can confirm Carly: is your gf gonna be mad that im flirting with you Carly: cuz im scrappy but she's scary Ali: 😂 Ali: Probably but when I tell her you're straight she'll have to chill Ali: yeah, we're married BUT SHE'S STRAIGHT, BABE Carly: can't tell her how many girls ive fucked cuz i dont remember Carly: convenient Ali: Best keep that on the DL, yeah Ali: like your blatant gay feelings for me Carly: k Carly: been a secret before no big Ali: Awh babe, ain't nothing dirty about this Ali: I shall tell the world Carly: you're sweet Ali: Probably not if you still wanna be getting that D but you know, noblest intentions, like Carly: im over it Carly: go off Ali: when your pussy's the cure Ali: how can I be humble now? 😏 Carly: dont be Carly: proud slags who fucking love froobs Carly: its a mood Ali: that is a whole ass mood Ali: put it on a t-shirt, babe Carly: earn some bread for my table Ali: solid business plan Ali: we can't be the only ones Carly: independent women who don't need no dick Carly: anymore Ali: hell yeah! Ali: unless that dick wanna pay the bills, in which case we'll let 'em Ali: so we can get more froobs Carly: point Ali: oh no, someone put a pic of Molly Briggs vomming on Insta Ali: 1. gross 2. who hasn't been there, poor bitch Carly: sad Carly: hope she's alright Ali: I'd ask but don't really know her and her phone must already be blowing up Ali: plus she threw a netball right in my face once and I don't forget, bitch Ali: jk, I'll just report the pic 😂 Carly: they all call me a whore cba to keep track of which mollys or other bitches Ali: She is a bit of a bitch, ain't gonna sugarcoat it so probably Ali: not saying Karmas real but posted on that friggin' TallaghtSlags page so 🤷 Ali: grab a froob, darling Carly: her name makes me wanna party with her dad but thats as far as im fucking with that family Carly: or mum i dont know who picked it like Ali: Init, proper old skool ravers, obvs Ali: think I'm out of eccies, sadly Ali: last night depleted me Carly: Watch me call my son Bennie cos I got anxiety, baby Ali: Cute tho, whole medicine cabinet of babies Carly: why not im married now Ali: We'll get on that, date 3, like Carly: where you taking me? Ali: up the wheyyyyyyyyyy Ali: well, we had brunch, indian, obvs we're fat bitches Ali: get on that chinese buffet life Carly: you can get on your yoga mat tho Carly: im fucked Carly: letting myself go so soon my bad Ali: Please, you're perfect Ali: I'll have all the kids if you want Carly: blushing is what i am Carly: how many you want? Ali: how many people names are there for drugs? molly bennie mandy charlie umm Ali: and our preachy child, frank Carly: ha Carly: tina that's one Ali: Ooh, yes, a gay icon Carly: billy, bud our weak child, cosmic kelly who's gonna have to style that out Ali: oh kelly, I hope you have the personality to match or we've really fucked you over there, soz babe Carly: can't forget dimitri, lucy or mandy Carly: sweet sweet mary joy Ali: My fanny hurts just thinking about it Carly: christine and tina are obvs twins thats a relief Carly: how manys that? Ali: 13 Ali: Unlucky for some but my actual lucky number! Ali: Fated Carly: ha Carly: it's love and keeps being proven Ali: can't fight what's clearly so right Carly: true Ali: you want a milkshake Ali: i'm having one Carly: yea Carly: strawberry Ali: 'cos u so sweet 💚 Carly: awww Ali: I shall be right there, with brunch fit for a pair of proud slags Carly: k Carly: my parents arent here no need to break the news of wedded bliss Ali: Would be a weird first impression but I could rock it Ali: new fave in-law? I think so Carly: yea Carly: cant fight fate like Carly: been said Ali: forreal, catch me outside if you got something to say, lads Ali: alone time with the bae is always good tho Carly: you kno Carly: love you bitch Ali: love ya 😘

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Grace

Janis: Is the baby still at ours? Janis: Iggy just told me Janis: What's going on Grace: They came and got her not long ago Grace: It's wild! Grace: How much did Iggy even tell you, like omg?! Janis: You know, he's Mr. CCC about fucking everything Janis: if any of the rest of yous had said something, I'd have thought you was taking the piss Janis: Is she even allowed to do this? Janis: Last I heard was Rio wants the baby back and Junie don't want it Janis: Ma just standing there holding it like umm 😂 Grace: Exactly why I let him do the honors Grace: Obvs! The baby came out of her she can do what she wants Janis: I dunna, surely Demi gets a say Janis: This is fuuuuucked, man Grace: Duh! He's still her dad Grace: They'll have to share Grace: Awkward Janis: Literally, how is that gonna work Janis: if Junie's dumping him Janis: Fucking hell, do we still have to have him over for family functions Grace: Idek Grace: Doubt it. Buster doesn't parade his exes around at them Grace: It'll be like that, I guess Janis: 🙄 Janis: As if they weren't becoming enough of a who's who of has beens Janis: Dying Janis: Why did they think this was a good idea, again? Grace: I'm like, did they even? Junie obvs didn't Grace: Ugh Grace: Only this family omg Janis: Well that's a whole 'nother situation Janis: he's JUST had his 22nd, literally yesterday Janis: and it's his first boyfriend Janis: Yeah, time to go get a baby and a ring Janis: Ma and Pa got 'em fucked up Grace: So true Grace: It's cringe that that's ancient by ma's standards, babes Grace: And that this fam can't go a year without bringing the drama Grace: Remind me of all this if I ever ask you to have a baby for me Janis: Literally bitch, we was cooking by then Janis: she's insane, not a role model, like Janis: Ha, you'd never Janis: Could turn out like me Janis: You'd die Grace: omg ew Grace: let's cancel that idea forever Grace: by the time I get a new man you'll have 4 with barista boy anyways obvs Grace: no room in the oven, honey Janis: Planning on taking forever, are ya? Janis: 🤢 Leave off Grace: Yeah. Single and loving it, thank you, bitch Grace: You're gonna make loads of cute babies with him and you know it Janis: Good, 'cos how embarrassing to have your baby drama overshadowed by Ri's like Janis: Can't have that Janis: Nu-uh, count me on team Junie, for the first time in probably ever, like Grace: Sure Jan Grace: I'll believe that when I see it Grace: 😂 Janis: See the lack of babies dropping out me, like Grace: I'll see you pushing a twin pram Grace: 💕 Janis: Oh no Janis: Can you imagine Janis: War flashbacks Janis: Not again Grace: I thought Ri was gonna have twins Grace: Double the drama Janis: Could take one each and bounce, tho Janis: Be helpful now Grace: OMG Grace: One randomly has a american accent too Grace: Amazing Janis: Demi would love it Janis: The theatrics Janis: He can't even deny it Grace: I wonder if he'll still go to Paris Janis: I would Janis: What's he going to do here? Janis: God I hope so, can't deal with the moping and shit Grace: Um, be a dad like he was so desperate too, I'd hope Janis: Yeah how bad he gonna want that now he can't have his designer gaybie Grace: He still has her though Grace: Rio isn't going to stop him seeing her or anything Janis: It ain't the same though, is it Janis: Not the dream he was buying into Grace: Duh, but if he wants Venus as badly as he said he did then he'll have to cope Janis: Nah Janis: don't reckon it was about her Janis: All about the lifestyle Janis: like a small dog in a designer handbag, init Grace: How rude Grace: I hope you're wrong Grace: Poor baby Janis: Meh, she'll be looked after Janis: Jay's better without her Ma Grace: But Demi isn't as bad as that, is he? Grace: For real like Janis: I don't know Janis: Never really talked to him tbh Janis: He's annoying Grace: He is A LOT Grace: And that's from me Janis: 😂 Janis: Such a good match with Junie, like Janis: fuck's sake, boy Grace: Opposites might attract but they never stick Grace: Has he never read a magazine, god Grace: Obvs not Janis: Cosmo ain't really his speed, babe Janis: Shoulda clued him in Grace: Yeah right! I didn't want to tell you all of this in case you didn't believe, imagine the vibe if I tried to school him on his love life Grace: And with my past boyfriends Grace: ugh Janis: Fair, and if I showed up and heard a screaming brat, I'd be straight back out the door, like Janis: Yeah, but he's even more clueless than you, like 😜 Grace: Liar, you love being a sister-in-law to your bae's sibs Grace: And she's such a cutie 😍 Grace: Excuse you! You better mean I've got the film aesthetic down, bitch Grace: I'm woke Janis: They don't cry, much Janis: and can both wipe their own arses Janis: I can deal with that, like Janis: Sure, sure 😂 just saying, did he need such a rude awakening? couldn't just realise he weren't the one before dragging a kid into it Grace: Where's the lie, girl? Grace: Had that scare myself though, so can't shade too hard Grace: Even though I am 😈 Janis: Boys Janis: So clueless, so stupid Janis: Not that Rio comes out looking much better but Janis: Hopefully we can get out of this without having to involve the law or the social 🤞 lads Grace: Literally! I'm not trying to go on a chatshow with this weave Grace: Trackies are more your vibe Janis: Gonna ask why, but now I get it Janis: Scared I'll snatch it live on air Grace: That or kick off and kick out at me in last season's nike air Grace: So shaming babe Janis: Fuck off 😂 Janis: whatever I'm wearing cost twice as much as your overpriced topshop garbage Grace: Hence I'm not showing myself up like on air Grace: Catch me in labels or leave me out Janis: Unless you wanna fuck Nance Janis: the rich cousins are claimed Grace: EWW Grace: There are enough websites advertising sugar daddies if I can't pay my own bills Grace: no need to go gay or keep it in the family thanks Janis: I dunna, sounds like you wanna fill Ri's stripper shoes to me Janis: Take her place 'til she works of the baby weight Janis: No one would notice Grace: Girl you better stop! I don't have the body for that Grace: Even with baby weight she'd earn more in tips like Janis: Yeah, you're so butterz like Janis: its alright, pixels hide many sins Janis: and they've gotta be at least a little short-sighted with all the wanking they do Grace: OMG shut up Grace: So gross Grace: Like I haven't had enough online drama to fill a life Janis: I mean, was thinking it was quite the #brand switch-up but Janis: gotta get that viewer engagement baby Grace: 🙄 Janis: Please tell me Rio's gonna change its name tho Grace: What would she even choose tho? Grace: it's not that bad Grace: Heard more cringey ones Janis: Its awful Janis: Full on stripper name Janis: least give the kid a choice about it, like, eurgh Grace: What are you gonna name all your barista boy babies? I'm dying to know Grace: And judge Janis: Please Janis: I told you, not happening, so I ain't thought about it, have I? 🙄 Grace: 😂 Grace: You so have Janis: Bitch no Janis: You were always in to knocking poor Barbie and co up Janis: not me, bitch shoulda kept living lavish Grace: You can do both Grace: Get with the times, babes Janis: Bullshit Janis: That's a lie yummy mummy's say to feel better about the fakeness of their labels, trust Grace: Mum did okay, hardly living in a cardboard palace, are we? Grace: And she had loads, I'm not thinking you'll go that hard Janis: Imagine how mint you'd have it as an only child though Janis: or if she had none Grace: Believe me I have Janis: Unlucky Janis: even if you were riding solo you're still #7 Grace: Lucky 7 😇 Janis: If that makes you feel better, babe 😂 Grace: How soon do you think we're gonna all have to roll out and see the baby? Grace: It's gonna be soooooooooooo awkward Janis: Hopefully we'll just smooth over it like we do everything, eh Grace: Gonna have to take back all my yay gay & I love my two daddies gifts Janis: Good Janis: Vom inducing much Grace: Demi would've gushed and you know it Janis: Didn't take much Janis: #loose Grace: You're so savage about him Grace: You didn't even know him you said Janis: He was a prick, didn't need to look hard, or listen, to see it Grace: 🙄 Janis: If he was a top bloke Janis: Wouldn't have made Junie have a kid with him Grace: But you didn't know that's what he was doing, don't lie that hard, babe Janis: Yeah, I ain't saying that Janis: He's just an annoying cunt, standard Janis: but now we see the whole truth of it Grace: That boiling hot tea Janis: Just glad its another one off the Christmas card list Grace: Ugh true, can't treat myself and all of you Grace: Poor Junior though, his birthday is trash now Janis: Dunna why you bother, we're still young enough to not get side eye over it Janis: I got it fuck all, like Janis: Yeah, bad timing, worse luck forreal Grace: He should be loving life with uni over Grace: So tragic Grace: 💔 Janis: Is he ever loving life Janis: Let's be real Grace: Ouch Grace: You've got a point though Janis: The facade is gone now though Janis: He'll have to deal with his shit like the rest of us Grace: mhm Grace: 👏 Janis: This fucking family Grace: Your bf has it worse tho, his dad is a proper headcase, right? Janis: Yeah, he's a right cunt Grace: Seems like it from the little one's vibe Grace: He doesn't like you still either, how rude Grace: never gonna let you 💍 in Janis: Yeah, you know your a right tosser when even kids don't fuck with you Janis: Idc, I'm unlikeable Grace: 😂 Thanks for letting me off saying it Grace: You lovebirds need your own place Janis: 🖕 Janis: Working on it Janis: May as well wait to see where we go for college tho Grace: Yeah Grace: If he gonna do photography? He's really gifted at the snaps Janis: Yeah Grace: Make sure he doesn't forget my clout Grace: Or willingness as a subject Janis: 😏 Janis: how could he forget Grace: SHUT UP Grace: you know what I'm saying, bitch! Janis: 👌 Janis: got it, calling all men in need of muses, like Grace: 🙄 Grace: You doing a night walk with your dog squad later? Janis: Yeah, why, you scouting for 🐶 talent? Grace: I'm just asking if I can come with or is 3 humans a crowd 💘 Grace: The gym was such a non-event today 😭 Janis: You can come with Janis: No doubt Jim will think I'm bullshitting so you can fill him in on this ridiculousness Grace: yay Grace: he might not believe this face either even though it's one of a 😇 obvs Janis: Overcome with a pressing need to take your photo, we get it, bitch 😜 Grace: 😂 Grace: Not hard to compete with your resting bitch face, babes Janis: Please Grace: And I don't need to hear how much he loves your O face before you go there, thanks Grace: TMI with the 🏩 antics Janis: You're the one who brought it up, babe Janis: 🤷 kinda sounds like you want the goss Grace: Please Grace: I just know how nasty you are Janis: Now you just sound jealous 😂 Grace: I said I love being single not that I love not getting any Grace: Excuse me Janis: 😬🤢 Janis: definitely did NOT ask Janis: gross Grace: You can cope Janis: Hmm Janis: Barely Grace: Pablo's literally tripped over you and your boy sooo many times Grace: but I'm the gross one, okay sure Janis: Maybe he's the gross one then Janis: Clearly doing it on purpose, weirdo Grace: Or maybe you are Grace: Exhibitionist Janis: Yeah, well want you lot to see Janis: Nutter 🙄 Janis: all up in my business 24/7 you gon' see some things Grace: 🙄