#werewolf carmy au

[the-berf]

Be(a)st Days

New York had been a mistake. Carmy regretted it near enough every day but never for the reason people suspected. Sure, he could have done without the stress, the abuse, the throwing up. But most of all he could have done without being turned into a fucking werewolf. Why Chef had singled him out was beyond him. It was all a bit of a blur, the memory lost between not wanting to remember it and not actually being able to recall it. There was something about being of the same cloth, of Carmy being his successor, of sharpened senses and unparallelled drive. To Carmy it was utter bullshit. All he knew was the pain of the bite and all the shit that came after.

Lycanthropy wasn't quite as the horror stories made it out. Full moons were definitely inconvenient but nowhere near the fabled compulsion to shift. Not once did Carmy go on a rampage through New York though he did get a visit from his landlord after someone complained about hearing a dog howling in his flat.

Rather than help him, Chef goaded him, ground Carmy down until he was nothing more than a burnt cigarette stub under the heel of an expensive shoe. As much as he didn't want to admit it, it did help. The constant war of wanting to retaliate but knowing he couldn't, of being told he was worthless and insignificant, it all helped keep control. Chef's words were poison but it eroded wolf and human at the same time until Carmy was just as apt at muting himself without Chef. Neither human or wolf, he was a husk, nothing more than a puppet that followed orders and ran the kitchen.

Going back to Chicago was another mistake. The absolute control Carmy thought he had wasn't quite as solid as he wanted to believe. Without Chef there to remind him of his place, Carmy snapped and snarled more. He yelled, lost his temper, became territorial of the expo - especially when close to full moon. But nobody was allowed to know. If they found out, Carmy didn't know what would happen and he couldn't risk it.

Quashing it all down, trying to hold back while still using the wolf's superior sense of smell, Carmy struggled. Adrift and alone, he was steadily losing grip of himself. The sleep walking got worse as he tried to keep himself under control. The one time he let himself shift to try and run some of the rage off, he ended up vomiting road kill and had to get flea treatment for his flat.

So things at The Beef got more and more heated, Carmy yelled more, smoked more and itched to just let it rip. The bastardised use of the words Mikey used to say burned. On some nights whenhe couldn't sleep, Carmy wondered whether Mikey had been turned too and that was why everything had gone the way it did.

Hatered for Chef grew with each day and Carmy had never felt more alone. Before Chef bit him he had already been alone but now there was a gnawing sensation of absolute solitude. Something was missing but he didn't know what. Until Syd walked through the doors of The Beef. Carmy's teeth itched to bite and he suddenly understood Chef.

[imliterallyjustablackgirl]

SYDCARMY FICS TO COME PART 1

So, I've been writing but not posting but I wanted to give something before the year end so here's some passages and summary of the fanfiction I'm writing about Sydcarmy:

AU: Under the moon. - Werewolf Carmy and Syd being a witch, past trauma, healing together

Werewolf Carmy, inspired by Wolf on Campus an old TV show, always felt that old vibe was something him and Syd could have, Syd is a witch who's running away from her mistakes, both of their insecurites comes in the way of their love but will they let it? :

- Chapter : CTRL - Normal girl

A night out with girlfriends makes Syd realize how much she missed this.

.

- I made a mistake a while ago and I'm scared I might make it again, drunkly whispered the black girl , staring at the ground. 

She was fighting confronting the haunting blue gaze that now made it's home in the back of her mind like a song you cannot get ride of. She thinks about the wolf, how supernatural she was. She thought if she could be loved, if she will fucked up that badly again. Will she ever be normal? Did she deserve normal? The frog fiasco wasn't bad. ''No, it was horrendous'' Which is worst, she caught herself thinking. She had avoided touching magic since. She had avoid talking to her mom since. She got scared.  It made her lonely. The truth is she wasn't sure she ever had friends. She often felt too awkward to socialize, yes people liked her but at what depth? People like clowns at circus because they make them laugh and sometimes Syd felt a little like that. Like an awkward clown whose whole life was a circus. A stage on which she could be mocked by her peers.

- And?

Does that make you less lovable? Less worthy of being understood ? Leah's head rested on her right shoulder.

Sylvia at her right, trying her best to light up a joint. Her red hair brushed Syd's knee in the process. 

Ronnie's long legs were a background character of the girls' scenery. The sparkling red bottom of her dress not moving one inch in the rising wind. The dress was mid-thighs putting in display Ronnie's thicker thighs, her dark skin was splendid and looked soft and hydrated, a vague scent of coco butter was following them.The soft breeze carried with them the perfume of the gorgeous girl, heavy hints of vanilla and bourbon-filled 

Syd's nose and she wondered if Sylvia and her got ready together because she could feel hints of the same layering, that thought made her smile. She was glad she got to share this moment.

Syd's raised her hand to shield Sylvia from the rising wind, the poor girl was having a hard time. Before she understood, all the girls were now creating a circle around both girls shielding them. Sydney chuckled, and could see a smile rise from the others all sharing the same thought, what a funny sight to a stranger this must have been. A light smile was shadowing Via's lips when the light finally sparked. 

She felt normal.  

From same AU : One-shot :Domestic life:- Fluff

The words dies in her mouth, she just lower her face to give him a chaste kiss as a good morning which made the other smile, with that cute smile she liked so much. If Sydney’s tooth were to the party when the girl was blessing the world with her blessed smile, Carmy’s seems to play hide and seek with the world. She felt so privileged when she got him laughing and fully smiling. Like a well kept secret, she felt even more proud than  her wash day instructions being followed. It’s like being present in the early hours of the morning, when everything is blue. Silent, fresh and refreshing. It crash in waves against anything you know. She felt overwhelmed with how lucky she felt. There wasn’t one moment since the man has woken up where he didn’t already revolved around her. He had barely shared words with her, he just stares, happy to be there, she thought blushing.

Au: Tonight, I almost died.

Tw: Blood, BDSM, exhibitionism,gun

Carmy works for the Gov, an older yet recently reestablished unit. It hurts his ego to know there's someone out there he doesn't know that is as young if not younger than him and a higher ranker. Mind you, this man works for a different company. She finds her intel dead in the same hotel she was at few hours ago, right next to the man she was flirting with earlier nose bleeding and lips busted. They both feel humiliated that their missions didn't go as planned.

When his gaze finally adjusted to the pairs of heels coming towards him, he recognized, embarrassingly so, the legs coming towards him. He barely got a sight of these beauties before he connected the dots. The man had forgotten all about the body 2 feet away from him. The warm blood made a pool around the face down of an unknown man. His eyes had time to hover over the body before he caught on the scene, the steps got more confident. The fact that the woman didn’t say hello made it clear to him that he might have interrupted this little rendezvous.