#which pookie man will come out on top hmm

[thegreatgremlingang]

reblog/share to spread pookie awareness

Update: looks like nie huaisang is the pookiest pookie, jiang cheng following close behind and after that our favorite protagonist gremlin wei wuxian! This concludes the first of the pookie games remember to tune in next time babygirls

[heavyhitterheaux]

Say it Back

First Lady of Private Garden Fic

AN: you stay playing with your man's feelings lmaooo

Synopsis: You play a prank on Jack that involves you not saying 'I love you' back to him

Pairing: Husband!Jack Harlow x Wife!Reader

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

You had been watching Tik Tok for the past few days and came across the prank in which you don't tell your partner that you love them back when they tell you that they love you before they leave. 

You decided that you wanted to do it to Jack and have Urban set up his camera to record it.

You knew that Jack had a lot going on this week and that he would be leaving out soon in the hopes of getting everything done.

It was around 10 in the morning when Jack had finished getting dressed and was about to leave.

He leaned down to kiss you since you were still laying on the bed before you heard the famous three words.

"I love you."

It was showtime.

"Mm hmm. See you when you get back."

Jack then did a double take not hearing you say it back to him.

"Mamas?"

"Yes boo bear?"

"I said that I love you."

"I know, I heard you."

"Uhh am I missing something?" Jack asked before sitting back down next to you.

"Missing what?" You answered as you played on your phone which was quickly taken away from you by Jack.

"You didn't say it back. Did I do something?"

"No."

"Are we… oh shit are we getting divorced?!"

"What!?! Jack, no. Definitely not."

"Do you not love me anymore!?! YOU ALWAYS SAY IT BACK!"

"Why are you being so dramatic?"

"Because we literally never leave each other for an extended period of time without saying it!"

"You know I do, so why do I have to say it?"

"I'm not leaving until you do."

"Babe, you're going to be late."

"Not if you say it right now."

"Say what?"

"Come onnnnnn mamas! Say you love me backkkk." Jack was now laying on top of you in an attempt to get you to comply. All you did was play in his curls before deciding to answer him. 

"I guess I'm fond of you." 

"Fond of me? What the hell is that? We have never gone a day without saying it to each other in nine years!" Jack was now sporting his famous pout as you simply looked at him.

"Damn, we've been together for a while huh?"

"Stop changing the subject!" Jack had now held onto you tighter and had his chin resting on your boobs.

"I really like your outfit today. You look good,  gimme kisses."

"I'm not giving you shit until you say it back." 

"Are you really acting out like this on a bright Thursday morning?" 

"Y/N Y/M/N Harlow….."

"Uh oh. Full name basis?" You asked while trying not to laugh.

"I guess I'll just take your Birkin back that I got for you." Jack said while shrugging and your eyes went wide.

"You will do NO SUCH THING. WHERE IS IT!?"

"It doesn't matter. Your short ass can't reach it and you didn't say you love me so you won't be getting it." 

"Why are you so stuck on this?"

"BABY! We can go back and forth all damn day. I'm not leaving until you say it."

"Neelam is going to kill you."

"Shit she'll get over it. I'm over here trying to save my marriage."

You busted out laughing and shook your head in disbelief.

"I'm a rapper, not a comedian and ain't shit funny right now."

"Pookie?"

"Don't call me that unless you mean it. I gotta call a lawyer now and shit. You want half of everything, right?"

"Look towards the tall dresser."

"For what!? Is the dresser going to say that they love me?"

"No silly. Say hi to the camera. I pranked you."

Jack slowly turned his head and saw the camera for him to roll his eyes before looking back at you.

"I love you, Pookie."

"I'm calling my lawyer."

y/ninsta: I love you Pookie 😘🥰

jackharlow: y/ninsta kiss my ass 🙄

saweetie: WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU JACK?!

urbanwyatt: saweetie he’s mad because y/ninsta played a prank on him lmaooo

theestallion: urbanwyatt what prank was this?

urbanwyatt: theestallion she didn’t say i love you back to him and my mans was in SHAMBLES for the rest of the day even after she did tell him

druski2funny: jackharlow lmaooo she had you shook huh?

y/ninsta: druski2funny so shook that he was ready to call a divorce lawyer because he was convinced that I didn’t love him anymore 😭

jackharlow: I’m glad yall find this shit funny because I DON’T 😡

y/ninsta: jackharlow come here you big baby and let me kiss you 🥰

jackharlow: y/ninsta NO

dualipa: damn I’d never thought I’d see the day where jackharlow turns down kisses from y/ninsta.... well y/ninsta my lips are available

jackharlow: dualipa I have no hesitations to shoot your lips off with a bb gun. don’t test me

normani: NOT THE BB GUN 😭😭😭😭

dualipa: such a hater like always

claybornharlow: y/ninsta so when can I move in?

jackharlow: claybornharlow move in where?!?

claybornharlow: jackharlow so we’re not proceeding with the divorce? I thought my time has come with y/ninsta

jackharlow: claybornharlow your time to WHAT?!

y/ninsta: claybornharlow he real sensitive right now. we’ll revisit the topic at a later date

jackharlow: y/ninsta REVISIT WHAT TOPIC?!

claybornharlow: jackharlow nothing. never mind. forget I said anything.

jackharlow: claybornharlow nah say it with your chest

claybornharlow: jackharlow I should have been the one to put a ring on y/n’s finger since I am her favorite Harlow child. Kbye!

jackharlow: claybornharlow I will throw you off a cliff right after I deal with dualipa

dualipa: jackharlow now why am I in it?

jackharlow: dualipa don’t play dumb 🙄

jackharlow: y/ninsta....

y/ninsta: jackharlow I love you bae! 🥰

jackharlow: y/ninsta if you love me so much, I need my dick wet

urbanwyatt: here yall nasty asses go

saweetie: jackharlow when does it not need to be wet? I mean I’m curious at this point

jackharlow: saweetie when it comes to my wife? always

y/ninsta: jackharlow oops sorry, no can do!

jackharlow: y/ninsta WHAT?! After all you put me through today?!

y/ninsta: jackharlow I’m on my period 🙄

jackharlow: y/ninsta what the hell does that have to do with your mouth? And you act like that means something to me? 

jackandy/naremyparents: well shit lmaooooo

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[kumkaniudaku]

Happy Birthday to You (1)

A/N: Been working on this all week and lowkey ignoring my studying lol. Anyway, I hope y’all enjoy! 

Word Count: 2,288

Warnings: Language. Mentions of sex. 

Soft sounds of rain outside of the window in your bedroom tormented you with its soft tap tap as you returned to bed. In twelve hours, you were expected to pull off an epic birthday extravaganza for your husband, but the unexpected storm washing away the sins of Los Angeles was beginning to put a literal and figurative damper on your plans. Sending a quick prayer to the Creator and checking the weather report for the fourth time that morning, you slowly slid into the spot beside Chadwick hoping that you wouldn’t wake him. The cool cotton sheets could barely hit your smooth legs before Chadwick pulled you into his arms to bury his face in your chest.

“Well, good morning to you too, Pookie,” you greeted as you brushed your fingertips across his disheveled coils. Forgoing a response in the form of a sentence, he grunted his good morning before placing kisses in the valley of your breasts. The scruff of his beard and his uncanny resemblance to his son’s morning actions made you giggle like a girl in the presence of her crush.

“So, that’s how it is? I guess I’ll just hold on to your first birthday gift since I can’t get you to talk to me.”

“If it’s not a birthday shower, I think I can wait until we go to whatever you think you’re gonna surprise me with tonight.”  

Your face screwed into an unreadable expression, “So, you know about the party?”

“Now I do.”

Your mouth fell open to contrast the cheeky grin on his face as you realized he’d played a mind game with you to reveal the secret. Chadwick, though a keeper of secrets himself, hated to feel out of the loop. He’d exhausted all of his options since Micah let it slip that he was getting a surprise. Finally, he’d caught you off guard and gotten you to spill the beans.

“I can’t stand you,” you laughed. “C’mon and take this shower, boy.”

“No, no, no,” Chadwick explained as he positioned himself between your legs. “I wanna take my time and undress you right here. I like the way the light is hitting your skin and I wanna use that thing you got me.”

Reaching over to the nightstand on his side, he retrieved a small video camera and turned on the device to begin recording. His hand roamed every inch of your body as he hovered over you and kept the recording going, asking you suggestive questions about the day ahead.

“What you gettin’ me besides a party, baby?”

“Hmm,” you pretended to think while he pushed the hem of your tank top up to expose your erect nipples to the camera. “I was hoping these would suffice.”

“You cute and all, but Daddy wants a gift to go with these titties.”

“Aaron!”

“What? What else you want me to call them?”

Placing your hand over his, you pressed his fingers into the round flesh of your chest with a sultry smile. “I want you to do less talking and more licking.”

Chadwick didn’t utter another word before quickly turning the camera off and hastily resting it on the bedside table. He took another moment to switch your position, simultaneously pulling your body on top of his as he settled onto his back. His less than subtle hint to take control didn’t go unnoticed as your lips found a home on his neck and jawline. Chadwick’s large hands gripped and massaged your ass while he rocked your hips in his lap.

The moment he’d had enough of the teasing and made a move to carry you into the bathroom, three loud knocks on the other side of the door reminded him that there were two other Boseman family members in the home.

“Daddy!”

“I’m asleep, Micah. Go back to bed.” Chadwick winced in reaction to your firm pinch to the underside of his arm but refused to change his answer. The throbbing below his waist needed attention and he wasn’t willing to ruin the moment.

“You’re not sleeping, Daddy,” Micah countered between giggles. “You’re playing with Mommy!”

It felt like your head would explode from the pressure of stifling laughter at Chadwick’s shocked expression. He looked between you and the door one last time before pulling a t-shirt over his head and shuffling through the room to open the double wooden doors. Instead of being greeted by one child, he was met with two sets of eyes that looked like his shining with excitement.

“Dadadadada!”

“Micah, how did Noah get out of his bed?”

The six-year-old looked past her father to look to you for permission, finding you holding your index finger over your mouth to keep her quiet.

“Uuummmmm, I dunno! Happy Birthday, Daddy!”

“Mi-” Further questioning was halted by her lanky body wrapping around his legs and Noah releasing a string of babbles that were probably an echo of his sisters well wishes.

Micah gave Chadwick one last squeeze before bolting into the room to join her mother in the very sheets that her parents had occupied moments prior. Another weight much smaller than the first pressed against his shin as Noah practice standing against Chadwick’s body.

It didn’t take long for the Wyoming King bed to resume normal operations, bustling with activity from the family as a whole. As always, Noah found his way in your arms while Micah took to standing at the end of the bed to announce whatever was on her mind.

“Mommies, Daddies, and babies, I have a ‘nouncement to make!”

Sharing a brief but amused look with you, Chadwick mentally prepared for the theatrics to follow his baby girl’s “important” announcement.

“We’re listening, Boop. Go ahead.”

“Thank you, Daddy,” she smiled, adding the best curtsey she could muster on the fluffy surface. “Today is your birf-day, and we have lotsa surprises for you! Mommy, please get Daddy’s first surprise.”

Obliging her request, you reached into your drawer to pull out the small box she’d been saving for Chadwick all week. With some guidance and a budget that needed to be scaled back on more than one occasion, Micah had chosen a gift that she felt was good enough for her Dad.

“Open it, Daddy! Open it!”

“Op!”

Chadwick chuckled at the excited urging from his children as his fingers lightly traced the black velvet of the long slender box in his hand.

“Let’s see what we got here. Did Mommy let you buy this with your allowance, Boop?”

“What’s an allowance?”

“Nothing, baby. Your Daddy’s just being silly,” you answered, shooting a look at Chadwick and pinching him under the covers. “Hurry up and open the box before I have to knock you out.”

Throwing up a hand in surrender, Chadwick used the other to finally open the gift box. His eyes told the story as he processed what was in front of him. A seemingly neutral expression transitioned into joy which slowly dissolved into a misty-eyed twinkle to accompany a warm smile.

“D’you like it, Daddy!”

Chadwick took his time removing the gold necklace from its box, turning the sparkling piece of jewelry between his fingers to watch the golden panther at the end catch the few rays of sunlight beginning to peek through the clouds.

Micah had been adamant about getting a “kitty” from the moment she was told she could choose a gift for her father. After weeks of searching for an inexpensive but sturdy chain that fit your little girl’s high expectations, Chadwick was overwhelmed at the small token of appreciation.

“I love it, Princess. You pick this out by yourself?”

Micah looked to you for confirmation, receiving a wink before she answered, “Yep! And look! I got one too!”

Her slender fingers reached into her Rainbow Dash pajama set top to pull out a smaller version of the necklace.

“You’re Big Panther and I’m Little Panther. Just like how AJ is a Little Pookie!”

“This is...this is great, baby girl,” Chadwick praised as he took one more look at the chain. Come here and give me a hug.”

You looked on with the apples of your cheeks nearly forcing your eyes closed from the broad smile stretching across your face. Deciding he felt out, Noah crawled his way to the action to wiggle into Chadwick’s lap.

“Hey, big man! What’d you get Daddy?”

“Actually,” you started before flipping the covers off of your legs to slide into your slippers. “Noah and I went half on your gift. It’s downstairs waiting for you.”

“Is it the McLaren I wanted? I knew you’d get it for me!”

“You are out of your African American mind if you think I got you another car.” Chadwick’s smile dropped into a faux frown as he attempted to carry both children at once. “Don’t make that face. I think you’ll like what I got you, baby.”

Chadwick smacked his teeth at your vague response before moving to follow you down the stairs to the main living area.

“If it’s another gift that’s for me, but really for you, I’m gonna deduct it from your Christmas presents.”

“I bet you won’t!”

“I bet I will! I’ll take that tennis bracelet right back to Tiffany.”

“You say that now, but wait ‘til you see what you got down here.”

With you leading the way, only the kids got a glimpse of him rolling his eyes at the back of your head. He knew what to expect. He’d seen large transactions leave the joint account for weeks with the assumption that you were purchasing an unnecessarily expensive gift in addition to the surprise party that was no longer a secret.

Instead, he nearly dropped Noah at the sight of what you promised would render him speechless.

“You gon’ stand there and stare at us all day or what, boy?”

“D-Dee Dee? Cheri? Ma? W-”

Coherent sentences became a rarity as Chadwick fought to process what was happening in front of him. He hadn’t seen his cousins in almost a year, and his mother in months, yet here they sat in his living room laughing at his bewildered expression.

You stepped in to grab Noah while Chadwick rushed to distribute hugs equally amongst the women in front of him.

“Tasha told us you’d be in here looking all crazy, but we ain’t expect this. Do you know what a brush is,” Cheri joked.

“Haha, very funny. This is my house. You a guest, remember?” Chadwick playfully reminded as he pulled his mother into a tight hug. “What y’all doing here?”

“It’s your birthday, son! We’re here to celebrate with you!”

Chadwick looked to you with a mix of appreciation and love in eyes, earning a timid smile in return. You weren’t sure if you could pull off three flights from different spots across the country without him finding out, and considered abandoning the idea. But, seeing the four of them share laughs and family jokes, you quietly thanked God for pushing you to stay the course.

“Auntie Dee,” Micah whined while trying to get attention. “Can you make the pancakes with the sugar like at your house pleeeaaaaaase? Daddy won’t make them no more!”

“Chad, you been making these kids eat vegan with you? Don’t nobody but you and Tasha want that.”

“I don’t want it either, girl,” you mumbled loud enough to be heard. The adults in the room erupted into hearty laughter at Chadwick’s jaw-dropping in shock.

“Well, excuse me for trying to keep my family healthy.”

“You excused,” Cheri answered. “Now, c’mon, kids. Ya aunties gon’ make y’all some real food. CoCo, you mind?”

“Of course not, sis. What’s mine is yours. The real cheese is in the back of the fridge and there’s a brand new bag of grits in the cabinet above the stove. Help yourself.”

The older woman nodded to signal her understanding before disappearing into the kitchen with the rest of the family in tow, leaving you and Chadwick to stand in silence.

You tried to avoid his smile and inquisitive stare by pretending to fluff the Christmas tree, but could no longer keep up the act when he pressed his body against your back in a hug. Chadwick placed sweet kisses along your neck until he reached your jawline, and finally, your lips.

“How do you keep tricking me with these?”

Turning to face him, you wrapped your arms around his neck and smiled, “You’re easy to distract after you cum.”

“Wooooooow. You better be lucky you’re fine or I’d be offended.” A rare moment of alone time gave Chadwick just enough time to give you the kiss he’d been dying to give you since he woke up. The soft smack of lips and tongues moving in tandem were drowned out by the conversation in the kitchen while both of you desperately chased the other’s mouth in a game of cat and mouse.

“Mm, someone is appreciative. I like where this is going.”

Chadwick let out a short laugh before allowing his hands to drop and grab a handful of ass, “I love you, girl. I’ll buy you two tennis bracelets for being so damn amazing.”

“I’ll hold you to that, but we’ll talk about my gifts after your birthday. For now, c’mon in here and eat before they feed all the food to your son. You know he loves to eat.”

Chadwick accepted your light tap on the behind with no objections before watching you disappear around the corner on the way to the kitchen. If left up to him, he would accept his gifts so far and crown this birthday the best in his life. You, on the other hand, were just getting started.

                                               ---------

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