#you know that dangerous sport where you throw yourself down a steep hill to get a wheel of cheese?

[pianokantzart]

I'm not against anyone topping my soup with cheese, but I already doubled the amount of cheese in this potato-cheese soup. It already tastes like a block of medium cheddar my guy, what are you doing. Why are you like this.

[tastesoftamriel]

So you know how it's human nature to do really stupid shit just to see what our bodies will let us get away with, including dumb food challenges? What kinda dumb extreme food challenges do the people of tamriel get up to?

I'm of the belief that stupidity extends to all things, right down to food itself. While I strongly suggest not trying any of these challenges yourself, you're always welcome to watch people making a fool of themselves by doing...

Altmer

The prim and proper High Elves don't so much participate in dumb food challenges, but they are competitive when it comes to their food and wine. Gastronomy gurus in Summerset often "duel" each other with blind tastings to demonstrate one's superior palate, from types of rice to extremely specific vintages. It's pompous, pretentious, and downright ridiculous to an oafish nebarra like myself, but as a chef, I can say they're arses.

Argonians

Black Marsh is home to a whole host of delicious seafood, but Argonians like to test their luck with what they call Sithis' Kiss, made from the flesh of the poisonous Michinitl. The fish is served raw, and sliced thinly with expert precision. While preparing the fish properly removes the dangerous toxins, unskilled chefs have unintentionally killed many a tourist and fellow Argonian alike with this dish.

Bosmer

The Wood Elves are brilliant hunters, but sometimes take things a little far in the name of a meal (unthrappa being a case in point). There's a common saying that the more dangerous the catch, the better the meat tastes, and this has led some to participate in ridiculous, and at times disastrous hunts. One story that haunts me is a hunting party that accidentally led a wild timber mammoth through a village, where it gored an old woman and grievously injured many others. Pick on something your own size!

Bretons

Rivenspire hosts an annual competition where a huge prize wheel of sharp Northpoint cheese is rolled down a very steep hill, and Men and Mer alike roll themselves after it to the finish line. The first to reach the bottom of the hill wins the cheese, but injuries aplenty occur during the cheese race- I will personally stick to buying my Red Northpoint from the store!

Dunmer

For some reason, the Dark Elves quite enjoy eating live things, and sometimes with dire consequences. It has been a trend on Vvardenfell to catch small octopuses, which are served live with a dip of salty saltrice sauce, pickled comberry, and saltrice vinegar. As you can imagine, the application of sauce generally incites rage in the octopus, which will sometimes choke its eater to death from inside the esophagus. Please don't do this, and eat your food dead.

Imperials

Wine is one of Cyrodiil's major exports, and the Province is swimming in it- literally. Wine-diving is a sport where a bunch of grapes are tied to the bottom of a vat of wine, and contestants must swim to the bottom and bring the grapes back to the surface with their teeth alone. The winner is whoever does this is the shortest time. As the hands are often tied behind the back to prevent cheating, this game has also led to a boozy demise for a few poor souls, who presumably died doing what they love: being submerged in wine.

Khajiit

It's no secret that Elsweyr cuisine is often loaded with chilis, and the Khajiit love challenging themselves and their guts with increasingly spicy chili eating contests. Participants are each given a glass of milk with moon sugar and are given up to ten different levels of fiery Oblivion to pass through. You don't normally win a prize beyond being known as that crazy jeek who can breathe fire, but it's a reputation that might just be worth the pain (not that I'll ever come close to winning).

Nords

You've heard about the famed eating contests of Skyrim, but do you really know about it? Participants starve themselves for days before the contest, or stretch their stomachs by gorging themselves, or just have naturally voracious appetites. There are only two rules: no throwing up, and no cheating, especially with magic. Everything else is in the hands of Ysmir the second you take a bite of turkey thigh. Only the truly gluttonous will win an eating contest among Nords. Attempt at your own discretion.

Orcs

The tuskiest of Orcs often step up to the plate when it comes to eating dangerously, but at the expense of one's teeth. While it's not common, bored Orcs have been known to challenge each other to chewing and swallowing increasingly hard foods, like tough jerky to whole solid dried bonito blocks. Unless you have teeth of steel and a stomach of malachite, it's not advisable to attempt this.

Redguards

The Alik'r is home to many dangerous creatures, including vipers and giant scorpions. Some crazy Redguard once upon a time mixed the venom from these two creatures, poured it into a glass with a shot of double rum, drank it...and survived. Many others have not been so lucky. While this dangerous drink has been decried by the law for years, you can't stop people from doing dumb things when they've really set their minds to it!