#you take one look at that dude and tell me he doesn't SMACK of gender

[corvigae]

Essek "Nobody can see my body under these Massive Fucking Robes and huge shoulder mantle" Thelyss is transmasc bc I said so

[osamiiya]

Getting Caught dating by Dispatch

Kpop Idol AU

Pairings: Kenma x Reader, Kageyama x Reader, Oikawa x Reader, Akaashi x Reader

Warnings: Kinda crack, Troublemaker can be done with any gender identity because it's that powerful of a song

All my opinion, if this has been done before please tell me!

Kozume Kenma

---

You weren't TRYING to get caught.

Who would've thought dispatch would be waiting outside of his groups dorm waiting

Honestly it dosent even look like you in the picture, facemask and glasses covering your face

It was the comeback hair and Kenmas jacket that gave it away <//3

It was one of those situations where your company denied the rumor but his company said you were dating

The two of you were doing so well with hiding it too :(

Kenma dosent panic tho, he knows the company will take care of it, and fans will latch their claws onto another scandal soon

"Hey did you see the article dispatch put out?"

Kenma blinks a couple times wondering why he should care what dispatch put out.

"No, why?" He puts down his phone to glance over at your screen, eyes narrowing in focus.

"Oh."

It's quiet for a second before the shrugs and pulls you into his side.

"It'll blow over, and the company will take care of it." You nod in agreement and watch as he unpauses the game on his phone, laughing as he says he's preparing for the idol sports day.

Kageyama Tobio

---

He doesn't even realize dispatch caught the two of you

Someone's following you around the city on your date and so he just kinda stuffs your intertwined hands into his jacket pocket and walks faster.

Poor dude dosent realize that even if his hair and face is covered, hes still wearing his group ring and the jacket his group promotes

When the article comes out dispatch dosent even know it's you until your company releases a statement and everyone's like "Wait what."

Both your companies deny the rumors and Kageyama even slipped up and said you were related

Everyone knows he's lying but it's the thought that counts

"You said we're cousins?" A laugh tugs at your lips at your boyfriend, layed across his bed and hands over his face.

"I panicked when the interviewer asked about you."

That's all it takes for you to let the laughs loose, the clip of Kageyama's pale face and stuttering voice replaying over and over.

Eyeing your laughing face Kageyama pulls you into his chest, laughing along wit you.

"They're going to deny the rumors right?" Your question has Kageyama nodding, and his grip on you tightens slightly.

"I'll have to go back to sharing you with the world."

Oikawa Tooru

---

It's surprising how you haven't gotten caught already

Matching rings, matching parka jackets

But dispatch dosent look your way until ISAC

He made the mistake of walking up and whispering into your ear close enough where he could "subtly" kiss your ear

You were far enough away from the fans to where it didn't look suspicious

But that one reporter on the scene got a close up of his smirk and then the gently kiss

Your companies knew already, and didn't know how to cover up a literal kiss

So they had to confirm the rumors

"Tooru!" Oikawa flinches at the sound of your voice storming into his practice room.

"Hey babe what's up?" His question is paired with a nervous chuckle as his eyes narrow onto the picture on your phone screen, a blown up image of him kissing the shell of your ear.

"How'd that get there?" His groupmates shake their heads in disappointment and sigh.

It was inevitable that the two of you would get caught, but nobody thought you would get caught during a schedule.

"You're lucky our dating bans are over." Oikawa tries to kiss the pout off your lips, and it works for the most part a small smile taking over your lips.

"Now we can go on more dates!"

Akaashi Keiji

---

You wouldn't think you'd get caught with him

And you didnt because you weren't officially dating when Dispatch 'exposed you'

The two of you were doing a collab stage, a cover of Troublemaker for an awards show

And you decided to do the kiss

Of course as all cliche stories go, you fell in love halfway through and dispatch picked up on that

cue you kissing on stage and Dispatch goes "👁️👁️ definitely some tension"

They're not wrong, Akaashi had asked you out after the performance and you had said yes

The companies denied the rumors as just a performance but a week later a new statement was released that you were dating

"It's not funny." Contrary to his words, a smile tugs at Akaashi's lips as you laugh on the floor of the practice room.

"Did you see their faces Keiji" At this point you're far gone, hand smacking the floor as you gasp for air, the image of your Ceo's face as you nervously tell him you were actually dating now repeating in your brain.

Akaashi's soft chuckles help calm you down as you stare at him, admiring all the litte pieces that make up Akaashi Keiji, the quiet chuckles, the slight freckles, and the blue in his eyes.

"Do you think they'll let us do that stage ever again?"

His question sends you into another fit of giggles as he tries to pull you up off the floor.

"We'll have to practice more then."

[kuronanox]

Captains harem ft. Julius

(Your name) didn't know why but today all the captains and Julius were asking for attention, it creeped her out because she was nothing special. It was as if they were all fighting for her.

Nozel invited her out for tea.

Fuegoleon offered to take her to a nice hot springs

Kaiser didn't he have a wife???¿¿¿

Rill told her "draw me like one of your French girls."

Jack was just a psycho but wanted to cook with her.

Charlotte suggested taking a girls trip to shop.

William wanted to watch the little birds and nature and even offered to show his giant tree.

Yami straight up just asked her to date him.

Dorothy wanted to take a long nap.

Julius followed her around like a little stalker he is for his own amusement

Mereoleona also threaten to beat some sense in her head if she didn't want to drink with the royal.

"Why are they all so pushy today? I've rejected all of them can't they take the hint? I mean.... I'm sure they don't like me!" (Your Name) tells Marx as they sat in his office.

"Oh thanks captains for not doing any work today, unbelievable. But you are a pretty lady. I can't see why not?" Marx tells her while separating some papers.

"Yami asked me to date him but I'm sure Charlotte is in love with him so no thanks." (Your Name) states leaving the office bored out of her mind. "Maybe picking one of their offers wouldn't be to bad."

Strolling down the hall she comes across Julius. "Yo!" She calls out running towards him. "(Your Name)!" He cheers!

"Come to the captains meetings today! We have lots to discuss!" Julius tells her with sparkles in his eyes. "Ugh are you sure?"

"Yes of course! Other members will also be there!"

"Okay! I'll see you later then!" She smiles as Julius pats her head and watches her leave.

Going back to her room she laid in bed thinking about all the invites she got today.

"Hmm Nozel and Tea? That doesn't sound bad but boring, I'm not even a royal. I'm sure he invited me out to talk some smack.

Fuegoleon and hot springs?! I get to see his abs and hair wet. Count me in!

Kaiser just no.

Rill is cute but I can't draw maybe he can draw me instead?

Jack.... what would we cook? Sweet offer though I would actually like to.

Charlotte is so pretty, I would look like the maid if I went out shopping with her.

William is a little simp, maybe I could use that? Seems tempting.

Yami, no? Charlotte would kill me.

Dorothy would not wake up if we took a nap together.

Julius?¿ would he be considered my Sugar daddy? AHH!

Drinking with Mereoleona seems fun! Drinks on her though, I don't got that salary."

After thinking about everything she walked into the Captains meeting and took a seat next to Asta, Noelle, Leopold and Yuno. "Why are we here?" She asks them.

"Maybe we are moving up in ranks!" Asta yells excited to see all his hard work pay off.

(Your Name) looks up to see Nozel looking dead straight into her eyes. "Noelle, has your brother always had a staring problem?"

Noelle blushes and flips her hair. "Nii Sama would never do something like that!"

"I guess so, dude has been looking at me for the past 5 minutes." (Your Name) states looking away to catch Jack licking his lips.

"O.o" she reacts and looks away awkwardly.

"Why is all the Captains trying to get your attention?" Yuno asks her as she sighs and laughs holding her head from getting a headache. "I'm not sure, Maybe it's a game they're playing because I'm just the joke!"

William kindly bids her a hello and takes a seat.

"Yer got an answer?" Yami asks now as she looks up to him and back at Charlotte.

"Uhh, no. I mean yes?? NO! My answer is no!" (Your Name) says while looking back and forth. Charlotte was highkey listening to their conversation.

"So you don't wanna date me?" Yami speaks up as all the captains perk up.

"Nonsense, (Your Name) has class and a acquired taste of course she didn't say yes!" Fuegoleon shouts standing on his two feet.

"I don't see her saying yes to you either." Nozel butts in as Yami just deadpan behind them.

"No need to fight! We all know I'm the perfect match for (Your Name)!" Rill exclaims throwing his body to her and embracing it.

"You wish kid!" Jack laughs next to Yami as they argued on who could win her over after.

Charlotte was a mess as she contemplated what to say because Yami liked a girl. "Y-y-yami a-actually li-likes so-som-some one!" She screams fainting.

Mereoleona busts the door open and folds her arms. "Oo I heard my little brother and I are competing to get (Your Name)!"

"Mereoleona, I won't loose to you. I'm the gentleman that will sweep her off the ground." Fuegoloen defends as they shared the same hot passion. "Woah woah woah, older sister and Aniue likes you! I have to tell parents they are fighting over a girl!" Leopold laughs on the floor because his older siblings were acting ridiculous.

Nozel scoffs and removes Rill off (Your Name). "(Your Name) is now my girlfriend." He tells them all as Yami and Jack laugh.

"Nice try bug braid."

"What did you say?!" Nozel furries as William gently slips past them and grabs her hand. "(Your Name) you seem flustered, I can let you escape this mess?" He offered with a mysterious smile under his mask.

"No no William, I see everything." Julius cuts in as he entered through the door.

"I guess Dorothy is out of question, she's been asleep." (Your Name) thinks just staring at all of them argue.

"Am I even pretty?" She asks Asta as he seem overwhelmed with everyone yelling for her attention. "I didn't know you were this popular! SO COOL TEACH ME YOUR WAYS!"

"Bakasta!" Noelle says hitting the little boy. "WHAT DID I DO?!"

(Your Name) was getting a headache from everyone screaming and yelling she jumped onto the table. "HEY! I'M NOT GOING TO GO OUT WITH ANY OF YALL! I GOT A BOYFRIEND!"

"Bo-bo-boyfriend?" Julius says pouting as the other captains settled down.

"What fool do I have to beat?" Nozel cuts in as Fuegoleon cuts in. "What must I do to change your mind."

"What a simp." Leopold whispers, looking at his older brother.

"And who may this nice gentleman be?" William asks clearly intrigued to take the spot away from the man.

(Your Name) looked around the room to think, she didn't have a boyfriend, but she just yelled that to get them to shut up.

Jack was out with his blade and Yami already had his sword ready for action. "Bro."

Getting fluster she stuttered a bit till Marx walked into the room, uneducated about what was happening.

"MARX! He's my boyfriend!"

"HIM?"

"MUSHROOM HEAD?"

"MARX THE ONE WITH NO CHILL!"

"How could you Marx?" Julius says in betrayal.

(Your Name) gives him a stare that made him understand to play along. "Oh! Yeah! I'm her boyfriend!"

"I'll kill you." Yami half jokes as the other captains grumble in disappointment.

"Well let me know when you wanna switch genders." Mereoleona says with a grin before heading out.

"One way or another a royal will get their way." Nozel says.

"I agree, I'll be the man to have you." Fuegoleon added taking Leopold with him.

"Ahh my tree house is always open to you." William invites her with a sly smile.

"Kitchen is open too, I'll cook." Jack says leaving as Yami shakes his head. "Let me know when your mind is changed brat."

"I'll still be checking up on you!" Rill cheers with a big smile.

Charlotte and Dorothy were passed out so no last words came from them.

"Marx, we got lots to discuss." Julius says before taking his leave.

"So the point of this meeting was for?" Yuno says clearly amazed to see how immature the Captains were acting. "Exactly." Noelle agrees taking Asta back to the base. "REMEMBER TO TEACH ME YOUR WAYS!" He yells before out of site.

(Your Name) breathes a sign of relief. "Thanks Marx!"

"Jeez, now they are out for my throat!" He yells not amused he came to the rescue.

"Sorry!" She says sticking her tongue out and running out.

"Where are you going?!"

"To mess with them some more!" She jokes as Marx just signs.

(Author notes: I personally like Fuegoleon the most! :D, this was fun to write! But lowkey idk wtf I just wrote, Not edit yet!)