taintedxtasy

[taintedxtasy]

It's not fair to always have you in my mind

[taintedxtasy]

I feel at my ultimate low I couldn't be more depressed. I know this because I'm my most quiet and calm per say in my mind. It still tears me apart but I can act so normal around anyone and everyone. I can be having a conversation about your future and goals and then after telling you my interests and what I might do with a voice of passion and face of determination, while I'm truly lying to you and having the me inside holding up the curtain of what you see and hear so you don't truly see the barrel tied to the chair with a string connected to it leading to me as I wait for the time to drop the curtain for the final real act.

[taintedxtasy]

It's been a long time. And yet I still think about you, I dont know how to put these feelings to rest.

I miss you a lot flowerbunch.

[taintedxtasy]

Birth of a Nebula  I can’t get over how kelp forests have the same colors as some nebulae. Ocean and space just go so well together <3

[taintedxtasy]

Can't get you out of my head.. but you don't message me so fuck it 🤷 you don't want me as much as I want you. I'd love to relive our moments.

[taintedxtasy]

““You must convince your heart that whatever God has decreed is most appropriate and most beneficial for you.””

— Imam Al-Ghazali

[taintedxtasy]

Aprox a year and 4 months later... still a wreck miss you so much still tiana

I'm a mess. I'm a wreck. Just want it to end

[taintedxtasy]

Can't even write about my feelings anymore because I just wanna feel nothing 😊

[taintedxtasy]

Just wanna blow my head off

[taintedxtasy]

I'm so unstable... I need someone

[taintedxtasy]

Every day I want to maim myself, hurt myself and kill myself. I am not happy. I don't want to live. This life is just suffering. My brain is to fucked up

[taintedxtasy]

For all the pain I go through. I honestly wish that I never met you.

[taintedxtasy]

I live with so much regret. It kills

[taintedxtasy]

I can't take my mind

[taintedxtasy]

“If your heart is dead, know that the One who can give life to the dead body, can give life to your dead heart.”

— Yasmin Mogahed

[taintedxtasy]

My heart bleeds love for you

[taintedxtasy]

I fucking miss you so much