tautozhone

[tautozhone]

lately i have just been obsessively looking over & watching the snail population in my back yard. dampened the steps even though it’s about to rain again because i was worried they were too dry for the snails.

[tautozhone]

[tautozhone]

people don’t talk about kissmessitude anymore. because of woke

[tautozhone]

Bucky and Clint are one of the funniest duos in the comics

[tautozhone]

via @swatercolor [insta]

[tautozhone]

you cannot talk about the homophobic murder of jonathan joss without including in the conversation that he is indigenous.

american indian men are at the 2nd highest risk of death by murder compared to all other ethnic groups. in their lifetimes, 82% of native men report having experienced domestic violence. yet the overwhelming majority of perpetrators are non-natives (88% of native men and 92% of native women who reported violence said their attacker was non-native). what’s more, tribal governments are often stymied in their attempts to bring justice against non-natives, meaning that many of these cases go unresolved.

this was an intersectional attack. the fact that he is indigenous matters, even if the motivation was homophobic, because it made him even more vulnerable and disposable in the eyes of his killer.

as always, look into MMIWP to learn more, and speak up for us. miigwetch, take care

[tautozhone]

lately i've been a feminist killjoy.

2. i pirate all my media, and therefore am not familiar with most tv commercials. i went to a superbowl party. around me were appetizers and bean dip and wine and the rolling movement of people talking - and meanwhile i was sitting there, stonefaced and bonechilled. the extraordinary, willful, in-your-face sexism and racism of advertising. what an odd whiplash: the warm and smiling hosts handing me nachos - in the background, some casual repetition of conservative gender roles. more than once i had to turn to my girlfriend - are you seeing this?

3. often i think of how rainbow capitalism is a canary in a coal mine. i think of what one google employee said when they took down their "don't be evil sign" - he mentioned that while it hadn't really done anything, the removal of it was... eerie. it isn't that i needed pride-themed fast fashion items from target. it's that the pushback to said items has now resulted in the company's looming silence. it's that the pushback worked. target is now among the list of companies aiming to "roll back" DEI initiatives. a false friend, i guess - but a bellwether nonetheless.

4. i remember five, ten years ago rolling my eyes at the faux-feminist faux-activist stuff advertisements would put out. i mean, who can forget that pepsi ad, oh my god. i remember girlboss anthems and lukewarm representation. but it did seem like someone was, you know, trying to be thoughtful. but if we follow the money, i think it's fair to say it used to be a good idea to at least appear "politically correct." now though - who cares? look at the man we chose for politics.

5. i am working my girlfriend through her first watch of FMA: Brotherhood. it should be a sweet deal, and instead, i oscillate from peaceful to pacing. the ads drive me insane. i've been counting - at least three involve a man silencing a woman in some way. two involve a white man silencing a woman of color. in my least favorite, she's sitting at her desk, trying to say the same thing he's saying. but he keeps fucking interrupting her. ha ha. don't even ask me what the ad is even for. i don't understand the plot of the thing. i think the whole idea is just "man talks over a woman. buy our product" but with like, somehow worse pacing.

6. on national tv, in front of millions of viewers, kanye posts an ad for his website that is selling a single white T shirt, a product titled HH. a swastika is emblazoned on it. people can't even talk about how fucking terrible that is - their videos get flagged as soon as they actually say what's happening. i am sitting at home staring at my stupid phone, just quietly stunned. we can make a rapist president, but we cannot say the word rape on most social media platforms. elon can nazi salute on television without consequence, but you can't use the word "female" in your research grant request without being flagged. the enormity of it all is impossible to grasp.

7. there's a company called "his", which sells things for erectile dysfunction. the ads are trucks and masculinity and very gender affirming. the same company has a "hers" line, which is a barely-tested weight-loss injection developed and sold by recently-rebranded absolutely evil company Eli Lilly. in the ad, women who are "overweight" grapple with their barely-visible stomach and smile, beautifully at peace while delivering their own "treatment."

8. i read a lot, though. i spend a lot of time online. someone recently said i write almost exclusively from a place of panic, which they didn't like. it made me laugh though - can any artist say differently right now? still. still! i sat on that couch and watched how casually bigotry is repeated, with no real audience reaction. am i just radicalized and unfortunately very easily annoyed? am i the problem here? can't i just like, relax and let it happen?

9. we stand in line at the movie theatre. i make some snide remark about how the poster we're looking at is basically "sexy trophy smiles knowingly at our hero, nerdy boy". from behind me, some guy snorts down his nose. feminist killjoy.

10. the thing is. i don't want to be like this. it's just like. in my fucking home.

[tautozhone]

there are many things tumblr as a whole has to learn but one of them is “someone can reblog a post without them endorsing every action the op has ever taken, we are not beholden to do background checks on the producers of every shitpost on the internet”

[tautozhone]

lately when i feel The Anxious Need of the Apologize For Nothing variety around my partner (or even in my platonic relationships tbh) i just try and stamp over it with an expression of gratitude. example “sorry im asking you to do this for me” becomes “thank you so much for doing this for me i really appreciate it.” forced healing? question mark?

[tautozhone]

[tautozhone]

very nice suggestions tumblr, thank you

[tautozhone]

DAILY AFFIRMATIONS

1. I AM A GOOD LITTLE LAB EXPERIMENT

2. MY SUFFERING IS FOR THE GREATER GOOD

3. THE SCIENTIST THAT EXPERIMENTS ON ME LOVES ME UNCONDITIONALLY

4. I LOVE GOING INTO THE TUBE/JAR/INSERT RELEVANT APPARATUS OF CONTAINMENT

Reblog to share with your friends who are also Scientific specimens🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

[tautozhone]

if were an author talking about myself as a character i would focus on my inherit need to share my food when i have too much of it and make sure it doesn’t go to waste as some defining trait with greater meaning. in reality i fix myself too little or too much a lot and it’s usually the latter so my friends and loved ones are slowly assigned to be my personal leftovers waste disposal (i at least ask if anyone wants the rest before i just put them in the fridge)

[tautozhone]

[tautozhone]

[tautozhone]

you may be losing the idgaf war but they wouldn't even let me enlist. on account of my poet's temperament.

[tautozhone]

once these 15 million different stressful situations resolve themselves I’m gonna be so normal again. I can be normal and not exhausted