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[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

day one - “beginning”

drabble for the 30 day challenge thing! fransykes. 275 words.

After a breakup, especially an unexpected one, you always end up looking back and asking “Where did we go wrong? Did I do something wrong? Were there warning signs?” These were the questions Oli was asking himself as he laid in bed that night. It seemed to come out of nowhere. In the beginning, him and Josh seemed like the perfect couple. He honestly thought they would last forever -- but clearly, that wasn’t the case. The worst part was Josh didn’t provide a reason, not even a vague hint as to why he suddenly called it quits.

He thought back to when Josh had owned up to his feelings -- Oli’s friends swore to him that Josh was interested, but Oli refused to believe him. When Josh actually told him, Oli asked if he was joking (he wasn’t). Oli really couldn’t think of anything that had changed between him and Josh in a negative since the start of their relationship. He just couldn’t understand Josh’s motive.

Oli refused to believe Josh would cheat, refused to believe some other man could be the reason Josh left him. He knew Josh better than that. Could it be something about Oli himself? Had Oli become clingy and annoying, like everyone hates? He didn’t think he had, but Josh may have a lower tolerance than Oli did. He wracked his brain for a reason, but he just couldn’t produce one.

Things seemed wonderful in the beginning, but he guessed it was meant to come to an end. He may not be able to understand the reasoning for Josh’s decision, but he could at least attempt to come to terms with it.

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

What happened to your inspiration?

School got in the way for one, but then also I just haven't been liking my ideas or how shit comes out lately. All I've been producing is shit, hence why I've stopped writing for the time being.

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

I was wondering if you got my prompt imagine thingy:)

The Quinnskarth? Yes I did! I haven't had much inspiration to write lately, so I can't guarantee I'll get around to it, but I'll see what I can do when I have the free time :)

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

Hallo:)

Hello :)

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

Are yu still doing imagines or oneshots?

I occasionally do oneshots, I've never done imagines though! Lately I haven't had the time nor motivation to write, mind you.

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

Hi. I um was wondering if you do requests for oneshot (like kellic, jalex,perrentes, etc.) I like your blog by the way :)

I do! What were you looking for? :) & thank you!

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

so this has been sitting in my docs for ages and i haven’t gotten around to posing it purely because of a lack of a title so i’m skipping that part. this is the one where dan and josh get it on in their bunk. smutty, around 2.3k, don’t think there’s other warnings.

Tour life was lonely. Yeah, you had the thousands of people you played to every night, you had your band and crew mates, but that just wasn't the same. You couldn't be around your family, your girlfriend or boyfriend (or husband or wife if you were at that stage) and it was honestly rather depressing. But it was one of those sacrifices you had to make.

Of course, their band mates referred to Dan and Josh as lucky, because they still had their boyfriend while on the road. They supposed they were -- to constantly be able to see their significant other was a blessing. But it was also a pain in the arse because, while they could see their significant other, there were some things tour life wasn't that great for. They couldn't be too affectionate (their band mates would make gagging noises and tell them to get a room (and immediately take it back when they said they would be happy to) if they were), the dates were utter crap because there were fans everywhere and they never knew the area, not to mention what Josh would complain about most, the lack of a sex life.

They did occasionally get hotel rooms, and their bandmates were kind enough to let them always share a room (they'd walked in on the two one too many times) but that was few and far between, and, for two young men, that just wouldn't do.

Today's activities though, they weren't of the inappropriate sorts. They had a bit of a drive to their next venue, and everyone simply wanted to get some sleep. So Josh was curled up with Dan in Josh's bunk (because Josh's was the floor one and it was much easier to cuddle in compared to Dan's, who'd gotten stuck with the top), Dan's arms wrapped around the smaller boy's waist, their hands laying on top of each others since they had fallen asleep with hands held. Besides the soft breathing of the boys (with the snoring of Max and Dan) and the lull of the bus, there really was no noise. Everyone was as good as passed out.

Josh's legs were pressed up against the bus wall, until he rolled over in his sleep (forcing Dan's arms off him and nearly hitting Dan in the face) so he was facing Dan.

---

They'd been asleep for a while, and Dan was the first to come to, happy to simply lay in silence beside Josh. He had Josh's arms around him, which had apparently happened in their sleep, and Josh's leg thrown over his own (which couldn't be all that comfortable, Dan thought). He had a smile gracing his face, caused by the cute look on Josh's, which wasn't quite a smile but made him seem adorable nonetheless.

It didn't take him long to realize though that Josh wasn't as adorably innocent as he seemed, and he had to let out a laugh (which he tried his best to smother because he didn't want to wake anyone). Josh shifted against him and he could feel his hard-on against his leg, and he wasn't sure what to do about Josh. He didn't know whether to wake him up or just let him sleep, though he didn't have to decide for himself.

"Thought you died," Josh muttered, shifting closer to Dan, his voice quiet enough only Dan could hear. He could feel Josh's words against his skin, they were so close to one another. Josh's blue eyes reflected the light slipping in where the bunk curtain wasn't quite closed and his voice was sleepy, his words slow and without much effort put into the articulation of them. "Stopped snoring, you know how you do," Josh continued, though Dan, having a normal conversation with Josh and aware of his 'problem,’ couldn't quite contain a giggle.

"What's so funny, mate?" Josh asked, a curious look directed towards Dan. Dan glanced down quickly, hoping Josh would take the hint, a smirk present on his face.

"Got a little problem that needs fixing?" Dan whispered, hand moving to the top of Josh's leg, thumb caressing circles into the jean material that Josh was too lazy to change out of.

If Josh was honest, he hadn't really noticed (having not shifted positions or anything) until Dan pointed it out, but now, he was painfully aware of just how close Dan's hands were to his crotch. He felt every miniscule movement of Dan's fingers. Josh wasn’t sure how to respond to Dan’s question, settling on a meek shrug. His hands slid up Dan’s body, playing along with Dan’s game.

“How about I help you out with that, then?” Dan mumbled, his hand moving that slight bit necessary to land it on Josh’s crotch. He pressed his palm down, continuing with the circular motion he had started with his fingers. He drew a groan from Josh, which Dan silenced with his lips. “Shhhh…” he whispered, his lips millimetres away from Josh’s and his hand still pressed against Josh’s crotch.

Josh listened for the sounds of his other band mates, now paranoid because of Dan’s words, his breath held until he was sure everyone else was still asleep. He moved one hand down to rest on Dan’s, pressing it down harder and moving his hips slightly to add to the friction.

There was something extremely hot about knowing you have to be silent, that one slip-up could alert your band mates and that you could be caught at any moment. There was something extremely hot, and it turned on Josh even more, despite the paranoia.

Dan had soon decided to move on from those more innocent actions (the ones easier to cover up if they were caught, as well) and undid Josh’s jeans, the zipper seeming loud among the silence, only making Josh more paranoid. He forgot about that as soon as Dan had his hand inside his boxers, wrapped around his cock, though. He caught himself from letting out a moan that time, instead his own hands returning to Dan’s body, his nails clawing slightly into Dan’s side (which Dan enjoyed a little too much) as he attempted to keep quiet. Dan was working his dick at a slow pace, taking his sweet time, enjoying Josh’s attempts to keep quiet. Josh’s breathing was laboured, though he was trying to keep it steady, sure someone would be able to tell what they were doing if they could hear him.

Dan could tell Josh was close, his body tense and Josh struggling to keep quiet even more. Dan took advantage of this, forcing their lips together again and kissing the other boy the best he could as his hand worked Josh between them. Dan’s free hand came up to play in Josh’s hair, tugging at it just a bit, as he knew Josh loved.

“Come for me,” Dan mumbled in Josh’s ear, after he parted their lips. His mouth moved down to suck a love bite into Josh’s neck after his hushed words, Josh nearly gasping at the sensations. It didn’t take him long to come undone after that, forcing his head down into Dan’s neck to muffle the moan he couldn’t contain, spilling all over Dan’s hand and his own boxers.

Dan waited for Josh to calm down from his post-orgasmic euphoria, before suggesting Josh help out his problem (which, of course, Josh would have thought to do -- eventually). Josh more than willingly submitted to Dan’s suggestion, his hand fumbling to undo Dan’s jeans, which were now smeared with Josh's come.

“Turn around,” Josh commanded quietly, seemingly random to Dan, though Dan did it without question, before he realized, Oh, he’s doing that. Okay. Though Dan couldn’t complain, because the thought of doing that in a bus bunk and having to keep quiet and just really everything in their current situation had his cock harder than he could remember, and he was eager for Josh to touch him, anywhere.

Josh forced Dan’s pants down a bit, his boxers along with them, to make it easier on him. His hands landed on Dan's hips, playing around and teasing Dan for a bit, until Dan put his hands on top of Josh's and forced one of his hands down to his cock.

Josh cooperated with Dan for bit, stroking him a few times, though soon stopping to lift his hand up to Dan's mouth. "Suck," he commanded, his fingers pressed to Dan's lips, though Dan didn't need to be asked. He immediately took Josh's fingers in his mouth, covering them in a coat of saliva, knowing that was the only lubricant he'd be getting.

Josh removed his fingers from Dan's mouth when he was satisfied, his hands moving down between Dan's legs. His fingers prodded against Dan's entrance, Dan smothering a moan in the pillow beneath him when Josh forced them inside. He worked them in and out of Dan a bit, curling them slightly in search of Dan's prostate.

It was easy to tell when he'd found it, Dan's muscles tensing, his head pushed into the pillow (but Josh could still hear his muffled moan) and his fingers clenching at the sheets as Dan continued to work him.

It didn't take long from there for Dan's hand to end up wrapped around his cock, working in time with Josh's fingers. "No," Josh hissed, his free hand swatting Dan's away and replacing it with his own, wanting full control over Dan's pleasure. He only worked Dan slowly, Dan's hips grinding down into Josh's hands, until he was stilled by a voice.

"'ey, how long've we got?" Max's voice sounded out, Josh continuing to work his fingers in Dan despite Max. When no one replied, the other band members likely asleep still, Josh theorized, Josh leaned closer to whisper in Dan's ear.

"Answer him," he demanded, stilling his hands for a moment while Dan considered following Josh's directions. Of course he did though, after collecting his thoughts enough to form a coherent reply at least.

"Uh, we," Dan gasped, Josh having started working his fingers again, right into his prostate. He tried to cover it up as him thinking, continuing on with his sentence, focusing on talking rather than the pleasure Josh was causing him (which he'd much rather focus on). "We get there around 4," Dan squeaked out the last bit, Josh with a malicious grin on his face, having squeezed his hand tighter around Dan's cock, enjoying the knowledge that Max could hear every one of Dan's slip-ups, and remained clueless.

"Time? 'm hungry," Max asked, but Dan didn't respond. Both Josh and Dan knew Max would check the time for himself, and he was always hungry, so Josh gave Dan a break, letting him stay silent until Max responded to his own question. Max announced the fact he was going to grab a bag of crisps, not that anyone else minded, and that was the end of Josh's fucking with Dan, figuratively. Dan let out a quiet sigh, half of relief, half of pleasure because, wow, he never thought he'd find this so hot and he was almost fucking there as Josh worked him in his bunk and his band mates (excluding Max) slept feet away.

He was so close, and Josh could tell, so he worked him a bit faster, his body in close proximity to Dan's. He arched his neck towards Dan, nibbling on his ear a bit before sucking a dark hickey into the side of Dan's neck. Dan's muscles tensed, his eyes sewn shut and his face contorted, mouth open in a silent moan as he came all over Josh's hand. He let out a small 'ah,' pushing Josh's hands off him, feeling too sensitive for any more.

Josh's hands came up to Dan's mouth, whispering for Dan to taste himself and clean him up, because though he knew he'd have to do the sheets too, it was hotter for Dan to clean him up. He complied, his actions slowed but deliberate. Once Dan had cleaned up Josh's hands to a satisfactory level, Josh pulled Dan closer by the waist.

"That was fucking hot," Josh whispered, Dan snuggled close to him. Dan mumbled an 'mmm' in agreement, relaxing back into Josh's embrace. It was an unspoken thought between the two of them, but they agreed on it; that was something they had to do again. 

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

your oneshots are hella good tbh

wow thank you bless you you're hella rad man 8-)

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

Disenchanted [Cashby]

So my rad as frick friend said I could use her idea of song fics, so I've got a few in mind, and my first is based off of Disenchanted by My Chemical Romance. ~1.8k words.

It was the roar of the crowd, That gave me heartache to sing. It was a lie when they smiled, And said, "you won't feel a thing"

It was the nerves of the day, that’s what he told everyone. They were in Germany, it was a massive show, everyone was stoked, and his nerves just overwhelmed him, to the point of not thinking straight. He loved his best friend, so he gave him a smooch. It shouldn’t have been a big deal, yet, it turned out to be just that.

He was never gay, he had never had feelings for another guy. Sure, him and Alan were closer than anyone else in the band, but that’s just because they were best friends, right? Of course, Austin never had anything against gay people, he considered himself to have a pretty open mind about that sort of thing. But the emotions he realized he felt towards Alan, his best friend, he wasn't okay with those.

He found the scrawny ginger boy to be taking up his every thought, ever since that slip-up on stage. It wasn’t that bad when he wasn’t around, because then the guilt didn’t come with the thoughts. But the guilt paired with the thoughts, that’s what killed him. Alan was his best friend, but all he could think about was pressing their lips together again, tasting Alan’s lips against his, running his hands through Alan’s hair. He found himself unable to stop his eyes from grazing Alan’s figure, unable to be around the other boy without the urge to pull him close.

It wasn’t just the urges to touch him though. He found himself simply wanting to be around the other boy -- to hear him talk and laugh and see him smile. He found himself thinking about a future with Alan, one where they’d live together and Austin would cook meals for Alan and they’d sit down for supper together every night, one where Austin had his arms around Alan every night as he fell asleep, one where they were settled down and they were we not just two individuals.

He hated it. He hated how Alan was taking over his mind and he could do nothing about it. He hated how he couldn’t control his emotions and he started avoiding the other boy, ducking out of social events, avoiding him after shows and refusing the other come into his bunk and other things that they would normally do together. He hated that he had to do this, but it was necessary, he had to get over Alan. It just wasn’t an option to live with this crush on his bandmate. It was unacceptable.

Alan though, well, Austin hadn’t even considered how his actions would affect the other boy. He hadn’t even considered that Alan could possibly feel the same, or even the fact Alan needed his best friend, just in general. Alan was hurt by Austin’s actions -- the way he avoided the ginger boy at all costs, the way he seemed to pull away whenever they were forced to be together, the way his eyes seemed to avoid Alan and the way his actions made it seem like he detested Alan.

Alan needed his best friend, because he loved him, and was in love with him, and he didn’t care how he had his best friend because god knows he had been in love with Austin since they were scraggy teenagers, sneaking out not to party but to simply hang out, spending late nights talking to each other and fooling around. God knows he’d been dealing with his feelings for the taller male for far too long to remember, suppressing them because he needed a best friend far more than he needed a boyfriend and god knows what would happen if he ever admitted to his feelings to his best friend.

But now his best friend was leaving him, for no apparent reason, and he wanted to tear out his hair, he wanted to scream and get angry and break down in tears because for years they were perfect. For years, they were fine, Alan and Austin were best friends, Alan may have felt a bit more than the other boy but that was always okay because he never showed it (any more than socially was acceptable) and it was fine. It was okay. They had always been that way.

But now, now Alan was searching for a reason, his mind harassing himself, blaming himself for being the reason Austin was pulling away, coming up with any reason that could possibly blame himself for Austin’s behaviour. He realized I like him. He realized how stupid I am. He realized what a horrible friend I am, he realized I’m no good for him. Any reason his mind could come up with only brought him further down. He was angry, angry at himself, and he was sad, so sad, that he was losing his best friend. It wasn’t fair.

Eventually, after telling his mind to just shut the fuck up one too many times, he decided to confront Austin. He decided that enough was enough. He didn’t care if Austin told him he hated him, told him to never speak to him again. He didn’t care if he’d be kicked out of the band or anything, he just needed a reason, a reason for this behaviour, a reason for the misery Austin was causing him.

So, he cornered him. Austin tried to make an excuse to leave, but god be damned if Alan let him get away again. He needed to know what this was, needed to know why the fuck his best friend had turned into a stranger who rarely said a word to him anymore, much less made eye contact with the boy. He wanted to sound confrontational, wanted his tone to be of confidence and strong, to force an answer out of Austin, but when he opened his mouth, his words came out more as a plea, a plea for Austin to explain himself, a plea for Austin to have some logical reason and a plea for Austin to please please not hate him.

But Austin sat in silence. He didn’t offer Alan the comfort he seeked in an answer. He simply looked down, upset with himself, because, no, he didn’t consider Alan’s emotions. He didn’t consider how he’d hurt his best friend, he only considered how he couldn’t have these feelings for his best friend. “I’m sorry,” were the words that broke their silence, Alan staring at Austin hoping and praying for a reply and not just silence like he’d been dealing with.

“Why?” Alan asked, and Austin knew he wasn’t asking why he was sorry. He was asking why he was pulling away. But Austin didn’t know what to say, he didn’t know what to do, because he couldn’t tell Alan, he couldn’t ruin what had been a perfectly good thing. It was all his fault, and he couldn’t be responsible for breaking them apart more.

“I -- had to get over some things,” Austin carefully constructed his response, keeping it vague enough that Alan could think whatever he pleased about it. “But… it’s okay now,” and it really wasn’t, because he still had these feelings for Alan, and now that he was actually speaking to Alan, he realized that, despite having feelings for the other boy which he had no control over, he missed being able to talk to Alan, and sit with him and be his friend. He missed his friendship with Alan and he missed the other boy’s closeness to him and he missed Alan but he wanted Alan and it was a horrible combination because to deal with his feelings he couldn’t be with Alan but -- Austin’s racing mind was cut short by Alan’s voice again.

“I know that expression, that’s when you’re thinking too hard,” he said, having taken a seat beside Austin, body turned towards the other boy. “It’s okay Austin,” he comforted, though he still really hated himself because he wasn’t good enough for Austin to talk to now apparently. “Why didn’t you talk to me?”

Austin simply shook his head, because he couldn’t talk to Alan, because Alan was the problem. Okay, not Alan, but his feelings for Alan. “I just needed to get away from everyone,” he claimed, though that was complete lies, because he only needed to avoid Alan. But now that would be impossible, because he couldn’t upset Alan, because that was a horrible thing to do and he had no reason to be upset with Alan, only to be upset with himself.

“You could have talked to me about it,” Alan replied, though he didn’t push Austin further, because he knew Austin would tell him why he needed to get away if he wanted to (and if he didn’t want to, well, Alan’s prodding would get him nowhere, he knew). “But uh… if it’s okay… does that mean we’re good?” Alan asked, hopeful. Austin shrugged, which Alan took as a good enough yes. “I uh, I’m sorry, if I did anything,” Alan mumbled, self-blame still not fully out of his head.

---

Austin and Alan ended up cuddled together in Austin’s bunk, as per old times (though Austin felt guilty for his thoughts about the other boy), just in silence, Alan content to be close to Austin again, content to know his best friend wasn’t mad at him. Alan pressed a kiss to the back of Austin’s neck without thinking, his happiness that everything was alright with his best friend clouding his better judgement. When he realized what he’d done, it was too late, and Alan was already scared again, because how would he even explain himself? But he didn’t have to, because Austin did it for him. Austin snapped and did it for him.

He turned over in his bunk, to face the younger boy, feeling guilty as hell. He really shouldn’t be doing this but he felt horrible not telling Alan and he just wanted to be honest with the other boy because he deserved that, and quite honestly, when he thought about it clearly, he doubted the other boy would even care, because he was always so carefree in his actions and though he didn’t realize what they did to Austin -- like kissing his neck or grabbing his hand -- he didn’t think he’d be too worried. In that moment of clarity, realization that Alan would laugh it off and not really care, he admitted how he’d been feeling towards Alan for the past while, owning up, and all Alan could do while Austin rushed out his explanation in whispers and far too many apologies was smile.

Alan shut Austin up rather easily though, also answering Austin’s unasked question in his confession, with their lips pressed together, before whispering “Shut up,” (followed by an “I get it,” when Austin glared at him) and simply pulling the other boy closer, because despite all the worry he’d endured and the fear he was losing his best friend, he wasn’t really losing his best friend in the end.

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

Flintceschi - "mistletoe" Drabble

384 words.

Christmas parties were never Josh’s favourite thing, but how was he supposed to refuse the precious blue eyes, wide and begging for Josh to come with him? That’s how he ended up out of his house, battling through the snowfall that decided to grace their town that night, arms wrapped around himself as he followed Dan out to his car, already a frown on his face at the cold.

He had no clue what to expect — to be quite honest, he couldn’t even remember the host’s name — but he followed Dan in nonetheless, the shorter boy forcing a Santa hat on his head before they reached the door.

"Hey Dan!" The person at the door greeted, "and this must be your boyfriend, Josh, was it?" He smiled, waving the couple in. Josh gave Dan a skeptical look, before the other boy quickly corrected whoever had answered the door. "Oh sorry, I just assumed because…"

It turned out pretty much everyone had come as a couple, and Dan and Josh felt rather awkward — Josh more so than Dan, mind you — and mostly kept to themselves, standing with one another, though splitting off occasionally so Dan could talk to people he knew (which left Josh awkward and alone).

After standing alone for a bit, Josh gave in, walking off in the direction Dan had disappeared, the kitchen as he knew now, before running into a certain golden-haired boy, just in the doorway, a smile on his face and two drinks in his hand, punch, whether alcoholic or not Josh was unsure.

"Hey Josh!" Dan said happily, offering Josh one of his drinks immediately. They shared a few words before someone stole Dan’s attention again, Josh frowning as he took a sip of his drink, regretting agreeing to come with the boy, since he had been expecting a little more attention to be paid to him.

He wasn’t paying attention as Dan shuffled closer to him, didn’t notice the boy leaning in because his eyes were staring at his drink, faking interest in something at least, didn’t notice until Dan’s lips were pressed against his, a rather chaste kiss but completely unexpected.

Dan pulled away to a wide-eyed Josh, wondering what the hell had just happened. Dan pointed up, grinning, “Mistletoe,” and suddenly, the Christmas party didn't seem that bad.

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

Flintceschi - "carolling" Drabble

286 words.

Josh hated Christmas carols. He hated them almost as much as he hated Gossip, or hated when his boyfriend would mess up his hair or the dumb grin Dan would wear after doing so. He didn’t mind Christmas itself — always provided a break from his normally hectic life, touring the world, playing in a band, but there were just some things he couldn’t stand about the holiday.

Dan on the other hand, Dan loved everything about the holiday season. Christmas hats, ugly sweaters, carols and ornaments, he just loved it all. He decorated his house, their house, without Josh’s permission, scattering lights and decorations throughout the small place, decorating a beautiful tree, a beautiful star on top (Dan would argue Josh was more beautiful despite Josh’s protests), he wore a dumb set of reindeer horns as often as he possibly could (and sometimes forced Josh into a Santa hat, which would be pulled off and hidden away as soon as Dan turned away), all the while singing those damned Christmas songs, humming them, or in some way including them into everything he fucking did.

Let’s put it simply, Dan was driving Josh utterly bonkers. Josh just didn’t have the heart to tell the boy to shut the fuck up. So, he dealt with the boy’s overly-festive persona until Christmas, and to be quite honest, he was so glad he did. It seemed Dan was even happier than usual during Christmas, and well, Dan’s Christmas gift to Josh was the best thing the younger boy had ever received, and from that point on, he didn’t think he’d mind Christmas too much, as long as he had that band around his finger and an annoying Dan by his side.

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

Flintceschi - "lights" Drabble

289 words.

Ask anyone what to do during the holidays, and around here, they’ll tell you the lights. Whether they phrase it simply as that, or whatever else may please their mind to call it, it was still a significant event to this small town, so of course everyone would suggest to go.

Married couples would walk through the lights, following behind their young children who were captivated by the somersaulting gingerbread or the laughing Santa lights, teenage couples would walk arm-in-arm, a hot chocolate warm from Tim Hortons in their free hands, talking and laughing bundled in their snow gear.

Josh though, he wasn’t from around here, he had never been here, so he didn’t understand why everyone enjoyed it so much. Sure, Dan wasn’t from around here, but he had been there before and he seemed more hyped up than Josh, not that that was an irregular thing.

“Come on!” Dan whined, dragging Josh behind him by the wrist. He was almost like a child on Christmas, far too excited over the things that, once you were older, didn’t seem worth any fret. But, Josh followed the boy nonetheless, eventually intertwining their fingers when he caught up with Dan and was walking at his pace.

It may not have been spectacular, but Josh had to admit, it was something special, if even just because he was with Dan, lights reflecting in his gorgeous blue eyes and a smile alight on his face. He may not love the cold after all, or the town or the lights or even the snow that much, but he loved Dan, more than anything else in the world.

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

Flintceschi - "hot chocolate" Drabble

519 words.

It was the couple’s first time away from home during the holidays without having to worry about touring, and they planned to take advantage of it. Or at least, Daniel planned to. Josh had no clue the day that had been planned for him — he’d probably refuse if he did.

Despite being the younger of the two, Josh was more mature than Dan — or so he claimed — and often refused to participate in Dan’s childish antics. Those times he did — like when Dan forced him on the carousel at the fall fair — he’d moan and complain and pout until it was done with.

So when Dan pounced on him early in the morning, Josh’s first reaction was, of course, to pout. Groaning about how it’s too early to deal with Dan’s shit, how they were on vacation, and how it was “colder than Satan’s heart outside,” as he so gracefully put it (which had Dan asking if Satan even had a heart — and if he did, wouldn’t it probably be cold? After all, the expression was “When hell freezes over,” was it not?)

Of course, Dan always managed to force Josh out of bed — it was his full-time tour job, so he had plenty of practice — and get him into the shower, to wake him up and get him going. Eventually, with much prompting from Daniel, some food in each of their stomachs, and far too many complaints from Josh, the couple were out the door, dressed in full snowgear, Josh now complaining about the heat in the clothing.

Dan lead Josh on their first day away from home — though Dan knew the area somewhat decently due to past vacations — dragging him skating at the public rink, and after grabbing lunch at the nearby restaurant he dragged him sledding as well, which had Josh groaning about how he was “too old” and that “hills this size need a fucking chairlift,” (which had Dan reminding him that there were children there too and to cut down on the language — but the children certainly agreed with him about the chairlift part).

After a long day on the town, or well, the largest park of the town which housed all their first-day activities, the couple went back to the house that they’d be calling home for the next week, Josh immediately flopping on the couch in front of the wood stove, moaning about how he’d have to dethaw his entire body and sleep for three days. Dan on the other hand, he disappeared to the kitchen, for a few minutes, to make the two hot chocolate — the best way to warm up after a cold day (or night)!

He brought it out to his lover, who, somewhat unwillingly, made room for the other on the couch, snuggling up to the other (just attempting to steal the warmth Dan always seemed to possess) with the hot chocolate warming his hands. That’s how they ended their night, not with a bang, but with hushed whispers and “I love you“‘s over hot chocolate and the crackle of a fire.

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

Flintceschi - "snow" Drabble

So I wrote some Christmas-ey drabbles for Emm (troshby) but I never posted them here so… (398 words.)

It was never something they saw much of in England, snow, that is. So when Dan stepped off the bus onto a foot — at the very least — of snow crunching beneath his feet, he was more than excited, he was ecstatic. He automatically bent down to form a snowball in his bare hands, still blocking the exit of the bus.

“Move, Flint,” Josh said, shoving Daniel a little to slip past him, Dan almost falling to the ground. His words had a harsh bite to them, but he knew Josh was only joking, so he didn’t mind. Josh wasn’t paying attention to Daniel, walking towards the corner store they had stopped at, so Daniel took advantage. He crept up closer to Josh, snowball still in hand — albeit melting a tad — before tossing it at him, nailing him right in the back of the head.

Josh quickly spun around, glaring as his hand flew up to the back of his head — both to brush off the snow and to soothe his head. “Oh, you’re going to regret that Daniel,” he spat, a grin forming on his face as he took off in a sprint towards the blonde boy, Dan reacting too slowly to get away before Josh had him in his grips, arms around his waist before tossing him to the ground.

They were both in a fit of giggles, Josh on top of Daniel, a handful of snow being shoved down a squirmy Dan’s jacket. Daniel let out a squeal, wriggling out from beneath Josh before attempting to shake out the snow from his jacket without much success.

“You’re a dick, Franceschi,” Daniel pouted, unzipping his jacket so he could brush the snow out with his hands.

“You started it,” Josh tossed back, “and anyways, you love this dick,” Josh continued with a laugh, before finally grabbing the jacket from Dan and shaking the snow out, Dan a little too persistent to think of doing it that way. He handed it back to Daniel with a smile, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek after he had put it back on, before he grabbed the shorter boy’s hand to lead him into the store before he could cause anymore trouble.

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

Troshby - "ghost" Drabble

Trigger warning. 606 words. Thanks to Tumblr user troshby who provides for great inspiration. ;)

It had started when he was young. He heard the voice, saw the boy, but no one else ever did. He’d only come around when no one else was around. His parents assumed this boy Justin spoke of was imaginary, just the result of an overactive imagination, to be eventually outgrown.

They thought he had outgrown the ‘boy,’ the boy Justin had described as a sickly pale ginger boy, floating slightly above the floor, feet never quite touching. They thought ‘Alan’ had left Justin long ago, but what they didn’t know, is Alan was still around. Alan was Justin’s best friend, Justin’s everything.

When Justin’s parents were too busy with work, when the kids at school had “too many players already” (but they would always let other kids join), Alan was always around, lingering just far enough away that the other kids wouldn’t notice him. Alan and Justin may as well have been the same person, because they seemed to think almost identical. The only difference between the two boys was people believed in Justin; people didn’t believe in Alan.

"Do you believe in me?" Alan once asked, sitting at the end of Justin’s bed, the other boy curled up under his covers, his Gameboy hidden away since he was supposed to be sleeping and his mum occasionally would check up on him.

"Of course I believe in you," Justin replied, giving Alan a look as though to say ‘are you crazy?’

"Do you want to be with me?" Alan continued, not breaking eye contact with the other boy.

"I am right now?" Justin said wearily, wondering what the heck the other boy was on about.

"No I mean like, really be with me, like we can play and you and I can actually touch each other, and we can be together forever and ever?"

"Forever?" Justin pondered for a moment. "That sounds nice… but what do I have to do?" Alan knew what Justin could do, knew just where his mum kept the medicine, and he directed Justin towards it, and answered Justin’s protests about his mother saying never to touch things in that cabinet with a simple ’you want to be with me, don’t you?’

"This is going to be the hardest part, okay? But after that everything will be great, you’ll be with me forever," Alan explained as Justin filled up a glass of water. He had used a stool to take a bottle of pills from the cabinet, the one that Alan said would make Alan be with him forever, and Alan said he was almost done, that he was almost there to be with Justin forever.

It was as simple as a few awkward swallows — his mother had taught him to swallow pills and, despite the fact he hated doing it, he was certainly capable of it, and going to sleep, Alan told him. “When you wake up, we’ll be together forever, okay?” Alan whispered, Justin now laying in his bed. Justin could have sworn he felt Alan’s fingers brush through his hair, even his weight on the bed. “I’ll see you soon,” Justin whispered, those being the final words to ever leave his lips before he slipped into an eternal slumber, to forever be with the boy he called his best friend.

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

xo. [troshby]

Blame Tumblr user troshby, the Fall Out Boy song XO (but only blame the title which gave me the idea) and my lack of sleep. hey cutie, here's my number, hit me up some time xo justin hey alan, it was nice seeing you again today, can't wait for next time -- there'll be a next time, right? xo justin alan, had a great time with you today, i really like you, can't wait for next week -- whatever you've got planned for us! xo justin babe, loved spending the night, great movie choices and great food with great company! stars were almost as gorgeous as you xo justin alan, apparently you hate babe so i guess i'm gonna have to get creative! i look forward to your smiles in my day now, and i love the little surprises you leave, thank you for those xoxo justin ginger princess, apparently you hate that name more than babe and your friends used to tease you with it, which is almost as adorable as you yourself. special date's coming up, and i've got plans for us! xo justin alan, you missed our date and you forgot why it was special, but i guess you just aren't that sentimental. that's okay, i can deal. never did find out where you were, but you were probably just busy. at least we're making up for it next week. xo justin ... you had excuses and you couldn't make it. alright. that's okay. everyone has their priorities. justin ... you told me today what your excuses really meant. you found someone new. where did we go, i thought we were fine? but i guess that's okay... i just hope you're happy. justin alan, i've seen you around with him and you seem happy (rather a contrast with my emotions) and that's good. that's okay. i'm moving on (who am i kidding i'm not trying but at least i'm not sulking). hope you and him are happy. justin

[tellmeyoulllovemetodeath]

i'm sorry i'm broken. [fuenciado]

Written about Vic from Jaime’s perspective, the style is purposeful.

i thought you believed in me. i thought i could trust you and you trusted me. i thought we were okay but we were never really okay, were we? did you ever even love me?

you spent long nights talking to me. we laughed and shared secrets and shared soft words between kisses or buried in each other’s necks. the whole time, i thought i was the one for you. i thought you thought that too.

what happened? did you change, did I change? did you ever really love me, or were those just lies mumbled by moonlight and fake nothings smothered by my hair?

i thought you believed in me, but now you told me you never really did. for a moment there, i truly believed in myself. for a moment there, because of you, i thought i could do it too. i’m sorry though.

i’m sorry i’m not strong enough and i’m sorry i’m not what you wanted, what you needed. i don’t know what changed or what crossed your mind to make you come to this realization, but i truly am sorry. i’m sorry for wasting your time and believing your lies and thinking we had something going on.

i’m sorry for loving you.

- jaime

—-

i’ve come to terms with what we are. what we have to be, what i have to be. it doesn’t matter what you are, because everyone supports you no matter who you are. but i have to be somebody, somebody for you and somebody for everyone else. no one will believe in me otherwise.

i’ve come to terms with the fact that you don’t love me, and you probably never did. it’s okay that you probably never loved me, because i never loved me either. no one ever loves me. i’m just broken. i’m unloveable. i don’t expect anyone to think otherwise of me.

but i try to act like i’m okay. i try to act like i’m something i’m not, someone i’m not, because maybe, just maybe, i’ll be that person. eventually.

maybe one day i will be able to be loved. but right now, i’m just broken. and no one loves the broken things. broken toys end up in the trash, broken books in the burn bin, but broken hearts, that’s one i’m yet to figure out.

maybe one day i can be something someone wants. but i don’t think that day will ever come.

- jaime