thats-not-a-thing - Tumblr blog

[thats-not-a-thing]

My Top 20 EPs of the 2010′s

in no particular order

One Stone - Trixie Mattel (’18)*

Two Birds - Trixie Mattel (’17)*

See You In November - Beth O’Reilly (’15)*

You - dodie (’17)

Intertwined - dodie (’16)

Room 93 - Halsey (’15)*

Medusa - Kailee Morgue (’18)

Hit the Back - King Princess (’19)

Make My Bed - King Princess (’18)*

I Don’t Know How to Explain It - Michael Cera Palin (’18)

Growing Pains - Michael Cera Palin (’16)*

Skeletons & Keys - The Province (’12)

Acoustic - PVRIS (′12)*

Words Without Meaning - Scattered Showers (’17)

If you were a movie, this would be your soundtrack. - Sleeping With Sirens (’12)*

Songs Of - The Story So Far (’14)*

WILD - Troye Sivan (’15)

TRXYE - Troye Sivan (’14)*

The June Haverly EP - Troye Sivan (’12)*

Once More, With Feeling - EXES (’19)

Woodland - The Paper Kites (’13)*

don’t smile at me - Billie Eilish

This Side of Paradise - Hayley Kiyoko (’15)

[thats-not-a-thing]

More mermaids! Two more of @badtusk‘s wonderful gals plus a slightly updated one from before. Its so late, why am I doing this. 

You’re all beautiful. 

[thats-not-a-thing]

Chrys Watches Got [x] / requests for individuals [x]

[thats-not-a-thing]

Driving directions in Europe, 1922.

[thats-not-a-thing]

do NOT offer me a big spoon if you see me with a small one. i know what im fuckin doing

[thats-not-a-thing]

Pro Tips on how to Dungeon Master with Travis Willingham

[thats-not-a-thing]

astrology says my pussy is tight

[thats-not-a-thing]

imagine being the first amish bitch in your village to like get your body done like ass shots titties done and like beat face contoured… and then you walked into like the saloon or whatever amish people have and everyone dropped their irish fiddles and was shookedt? like everyone churning butter was just in shock and you walked across the artisanal wood floors in your wantmylook.com thigh high lace up heeled boots like your life depended on it… yes god

[thats-not-a-thing]

[thats-not-a-thing]

so many men have no idea what to do when confronted with a woman who isn’t putting on a customer service personality

[thats-not-a-thing]

[thats-not-a-thing]

Yeah I understand schroedingers law, that any closed box could contain either whatever is supposed to be in it, or a dead cat, which is why i don’t go into shoe stores,

[thats-not-a-thing]

actually when I was in 8th grade and obsessed with twilight my master plan as a twilight vampire was to sit around in famous shipwrecks like the super deep ones where they can only send robots with cameras from their submarines and when they sent one down i’d be sitting there, pretending to drink out of an old tea cup you know for the drama of it all and the guys in the submarine would know what they saw and that it was real footage but who else would believe them? no one important.

but it didn’t stop there. at the next party they threw to celebrate one of their latest finds, some museum-y banquet idk I was 13, I was going to show up. I was going to show up and make eye contact with them one at a time from across the room and they were going to lose their goddamn minds and then before the volturi could catch wind i was gonna be back in the ocean. how could they find me?

the drama. the theatrics. i can’t believe i didn’t realize i was gay right then but that’s another story, also involving vampires,

[thats-not-a-thing]

some more updog memes i drew

[thats-not-a-thing]

The thing I love about cats is that they’re basically born ready to throw down. There’s something strangely life-affirming about seeing a ball of fuzz that could fit in the palm of your hand with room to spare react to an unfamiliar creature literally a hundred times its size by going “I roll Intimidation”.

[thats-not-a-thing]

bastard keeps sprinting to get ahead of me then walks really slow so i accidentally kick him and then meows all pathetically like i attacked him

[thats-not-a-thing]

okay but hear me out, demonic possession would be a really good diagnostic tool. Especially for illnesses like fibromyalgia that are hard to test for and have “subjective” symptoms (like, you can’t externally measure pain and fatigue, and someone who’s had it all their life won’t always know it’s not normal.) You just draw a nice pentagon, set up all the protective candles, and summon a demon into the patient’s body and ask them the sacred Questions Three, which are “okay Demon Todd how bad is it in there,” “where are the main places that hurt more than the last thirty humans you possessed” and “got any wisdom to share?” and then you give Todd a beer and politely excise him from this material plane and start drafting your new treatment plan.