the-bard-followed-the-witcher - Tumblr blog

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

jaskier : ladies and gentlemen i give you my new song about the white wolf, geralt of rivia!

tavern goers :

jaskier : i hear you're alive

jaskier : how disappointing

everyone in the tavern :

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

Ppl to Geralt after Toss A Coin To Your Witcher became famous: The white wolf!! Our hero!! Save us!! Take our money!!

Ppl to Geralt after Jaskier wrote Burn Butcher: Whore. Go back to Whore Mountain. You Whore.

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

okay, but geralt is such a flirt once he feels comfortable enough with the right person. imagine him and jaskier being together for a couple of years and geralt starts flirting with him. all of the time.

***

"jask?"

"yes, dear?"

"have you looked in the mirror today?"

"um, no. why you ask?"

"just thought it's unfair that i'm the only one who gets to enjoy this beautiful view".

***

and it's so bad and so cheesy and jaskier absolutely loves it.

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

*Geralt and Lambert, watching Jaskier preform.*

Geralt, staring at Jaskier: I could take him.

Lambert: The bard? Obviously. You're much bigger and stronger than him.

Geralt:

Lambert: Wait, you mean in a fight, right?

Geralt: *smiles*

Lambert: You mean in a fight?

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

Fae Jaskier and a confused Geralt :DD

((click on it for high-res, it has cool paper texture on it))

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

Geralt: Jaskier...

Jaskier: Oh no, 'Jaskier' in B flat.

Jaskier: You're disappointed.

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

having thoughts about the Witcher Daemon AU...

In this universe witcher daemons have their own Paths and get turned into witchers themselves before settle, so they basically take off and reunite with their humans in the winter when the season ends. This means most people believe witchers are monsters without daemons, and the witchers don't ever correct them for the same reasons they let everyone believe they don't have emotions. It's a strange sort of protection for them and their daemons' vulnerabilities.

Jaskier's daemon is a cedar waxwing named Meilasenka, and she may be the chattiest daemon to ever exist. Meilas is extremely bold about talking directly to other humans, and absolutely thrives when she's getting attention. Waxwings are highly migratory and adaptable, meaning she and Jaskier have been prone to Roaming since they could walk, looking for adventure and the chance to perform all around the continent.

Geralt's relationship with his daemon Alindola is a bit more strained. The two only see each other during the winter and don't really know how to integrate back together since their severance decades ago. Witcher daemons maintain their adaptability and can transform into whatever animal is the most optimal along the Path, but Alindola mainly stays in the shape of a massive white wolf. Ever since the second round of trials they endured, all of her forms have been albino. The prominent scars across her nose and flank carry over across her different forms as well.

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

shoutout to the witcher books theyre kinda silly

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

Geralt: Ugh this annoying stupid bard insists on following me around. He endangers himself for silly songs and the never fucking listens to me

*Geralt brings Jaskier to Kaer Morhen*

Eskel and Lambert:

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

Yennefer: I sleep with a dagger under my pillow.

Renfri: Weak, I sleep with a sword.

Jaskier: You guys are pathetic.

Yennefer: Oh? What do you sleep with?

Jaskier: Geralt.

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

Geralt going from "Why the fuck do I need to watch over this reckless, hyperactive kid, with his annoying songs and 0 sense of self preservation. So what if he's cute?" to "Holy shit, when did this kid turn 40 and why does that beard and that hair look so ridiculously hot on him? When did I manage to fall in love with this wonderful idiot??"

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

I sought you in the dawn of day

An alternative piece to the more explicit version of last years Somnophilia Kinktober prompt. I wrote half a fic for it but never got to the good parts so I never picked it up again so I might as well post it without any context.

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

Okay but Geralt would be absolutely obnoxious about the fact that he and Jaskier tied the knot.

He'd call him "husband" every chance he gets and whenever they'd have to book a room or something, he'd be like "A room for my husband and I."

"My husband is actually a very well known bard with an established career."

"Do you want to know the story of how my husband and I met?"

He'd just. Never be able to get over the fact that Jaskier chose him. For life, for better and for worse, in sickness and health.

Bound forever. And after a lifetime of misery and loneliness, he would wanna share that joy with everyone who's willing to listen (and also those who don't).

(And Jaskier is obviously equally obnoxiously in love with him, only he let's it all out by writing love ballad after love ballad.)

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

of a witcher and his kitten.

a continuation of this. For Day 7 of @witcher-bows-and-arrows​ ‘s event: Bliss. wc: 633

“Geralt, I seem to have lost the ribbon on my doubl—”

“Shhhhhhh!” Geralt cuts Jaskier off before he has a chance to finish, his index finger pressed to his lips for emphasis.

Just when the bard is about to protest, he glares at him once more and gestures down to his lap.

Curled up a tiny orange ball lies a kitten, fast asleep with the tip of his tail hanging off Geralt’s leg. The Witcher stares at it in adoration before looking back up to find Jaskier observing him with a raised eyebrow.

“What?” he whispers, careful not to disturb the ball of fur.

“Geralt, it’s a cat,” Jaskier begins but significantly lowers the volume of his voice when he receives another death stare. “It won’t die from the sound of my voice.”

Geralt smirks. “I’m sure Valdo Marx would beg to differ.” And before Jaskier has a chance to get offended, he adds: “The little guy is exhausted. He’s only now settled down and I don’t want you disturbing him.”

Jaskier does puff out his chest and frowns at him, but he seems to understand that this is a battle he can’t win and stays silent.

“Look at him,” Geralt says and signals the bard to come closer. Jaskier crouches down next to the chair he is sitting on and the Witcher smugly notices the grin on his face as he looks at the kitten.

“He’s so tiny!” Jaskier exclaims, inching forward so that he is at eye level with the feline. “Do we even know if it’s a ‘he‘?”

Geralt nods. “Yes, he is big enough that you can tell. I reckon he is about 6 weeks old. Thank god we found him.”

Jaskier grabs the Witcher’s hand and presses a soft kiss to its knuckles.

“And you want to keep him? Are you sure that we are going to be able to take care of him?”

Geralt smiles and reaches out to run his fingers over Jaskier’s cheek. His stomach flutters when the bard leans into his touch. What a lucky man he is.

“Anything is better than the side of the road, especially when he is still too young to hunt for himself. He is going to be just fine.”

He pauses and looks down at the kitten. Their kitten.

“That’s why I named him Dandelion. Able to prosper anywhere and impossible to get rid of, much like a certain someone I know.” Jaskier chuckles and gently boxes him in the side.

“You ass. How can you be such a sap and still insult me in the same sentence?”

Carefully, the bard brushes his hand over Dandelion’s fur. Apart from a soft Mrrrp he doesn’t get a reaction, the kitten undisturbed by his touch.

“I didn’t think a cat could look this happy and content. Though I don’t blame him, your lap is a truly wonderful place for a nap. I suppose I will have to learn to share it.”

At that, Dandelion shifts and stretches, revealing his neck and the piece of blue ribbon wrapped around it.

Jaskier gives Geralt a pointed look, but the Witcher grins, feigning innocence.

“You thief!” he says, but there is no anger to his voice.

He inspects the make-shift collar before determining: “I guess that will do. For now. My love, you cannot call a cat ‘Dandelion’ and then have it run around wearing a blue ribbon! I shall go to the market tomorrow and see if I can find a yellow one. Oh! Maybe I can have them make a custom one with some embroidery…”

Geralt has to suppress a laugh as he listens to Jaskier ramble on and on about possible ribbon-option. And to think he was ever worried about the bard not accepting this new addition to their family.

tagging @natilieal​ @herostag @luteandsword​ @clarebear66​ and @writeroutoftime​ ✨

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

JASKIER | The Witcher S2   ↪ “Look, people do stupid things when they think they’re trapped in a corner, Geralt.”

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

You think you’re safe without a care But here in Posada, you’d be wise to beware

Geraskier + meet-cute

[the-bard-followed-the-witcher]

Adorable

Headcanon that the first time Jaskier gets hurt whilst he is out and about with Geralt, he cuts himself pretty bad. Maybe he took a fall and hit his head on a rock, maybe a monster managed to strike him.

Point being, he's hurt but he doesn't want to show it, even though every inch of his body is trembling as Geralt takes care of his wound. Nothing to make the Witcher think he's weak, to make him leave the bard behind because he's just dead weight.

Jaskier does what Jaskier does when he's uncomfortable and cracks a joke.

"My mother would always blow on my scraped knees to make it better."

The soft breath of air hitting his skin is enough to render him speechless, and the tenderness with which Geralt looks at him is almost too much.

It becomes their ritual after that. No matter who gets hurt, when they're done being patched up, the other one will gently blow on the bruised ankle or bandaged wound.

And even though Geralt would never admit it, would never ask for it, it is the sweetest kind of pain medication.

Eventually, a kiss gets added to it.