the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

If They Had A Kid... (Meme)

Send me a pairing and I’ll fill this out with what their kid would be like!

Name: 

Gender: 

General appearance: 

Personality: 

Special Talents: 

Who they like better: 

Who they take after more:

Personal headcanon: 

Face Claim: 

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

first date sentences .

between friends .

“ oh my god. i can’t breathe. this is it. i’m dying. ”

“ but, would it be weird if i suddenly got a case of the flu? ”

“ do i look fat in this? of course i do. don’t even answer. “

“ what if he/she/they won’t like me? ”

“ god everything looks weird on me now. ”

“ not sure if i want to throw up, faint or both. ”

“ we’re meeting in an hour and i have no idea what to wear. ”

“ you know them ?! why are telling me just now !? ”

“ okay but legit question ; how do you know that they won’t kidnap you? ”

“ do i kiss them goodbye ? or do i hug them ? what is natural !? ”

“ i can’t do this ! i’m going to fuck up. ”

“ promise me you’ll call me if i ask you to. ”

“ but if they don’t look like their profile picture ? ”

“ if i don’t want to meet them maybe i can pretend to be someone else. ”

“ i know, i know. no sex on the first date. ”

“ NO YOU CAN’T COME WITH. ”

“ rest in fucking pieces. this will be the death of my love life. ”

the first meeting .

“ woah — you look… great! ”

“ so you’re my date for the evening? you look better in real life. ”

“ where do you want to eat? ”

“ do we… shake hands or — hug, or… ? ”

“ i rarely do this, haha! ”

“ i was nervous you wouldn’t make it! ”

“ i just have to say that i’m really nervous, sorry! ”

“ sorry that i’m late ! ”

“ oh… your profile didn’t mention — that. ”

“ let me get your coa— you’re not wearing a coat, haha, oops — ”

“ no, please — allow me! ”

“ i just can’t take my eyes off you, sorry ~ you’re just really stunning. ”

dinner for two .

“ what do you do, and how long have you been doing it? ”

” where are you originally from? ”

“ where did you go to school? ”

” what was your major? ”

“ where exactly do you live in [insert your city or town here]? ”

” so you have any nicknames? ”

“ if you won the lottery tomorrow, what’s the first thing you’d buy? ”

” do you have any siblings? ”

“ if you could be any person for a day, who would it be? ”

“ there’s this bar downtown… we could check it out? ”

“ what are we doing after this ? ”

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

SHIPPY-ISH/FLUFF-ISH STARTERS ❛ I love you so much…❜ ❛  Can I kiss you ? ❜ ❛  You are so beautiful — So fucking beautiful. ❜ ❛  Close your eyes, you can trust me. ❜ ❛  I got you a present-❜ ❛   Kiss me. ❜ ❛  Love me– ❜ ❛  Mmm, taste like cherries.  ❜ ❛  Pull me in, Pull me in - ❜ ❛   Make love to me…❜ ❛   I love your eyes… ❜ ❛   You got whip cream there .❜ ❛   Waffles or pancakes ? ❜ ❛   Knock It off that tickles ! ❜ ❛   You’re so warm… ❜ ❛   I can hear your heart beat — it’s soft.❜ ❛   it’s raining outside and all I can think about is you.  ❜ ❛   Hold my hand - ❜ ❛   We have something special, You and I.❜ ❛   You mean everything to me.  ❜ ❛   When can I see you again ?❜ ❛   Say my name, just one last time… ❜ ❛   You’re a mystery worth solving. ❜ ❛   I trust you — that means a lot more than love.❜ ❛   I fall in love with you every time I open my eyes. ❜ ❛   You are infinite like the universe.  ❜ ❛   Kiss me like you wanna be loved. ❜ ❛   You’re the apple of my eye.❜ ❛   You make me happy. ❜ ❛   You make me feel safe…❜ ❛   Hold me just a little longer… ❜ ❛   Please don’t let go.❜ ❛   All my fears go away when I’m with you -  ❜ ❛   Thank you for teaching me what love is. ❜ ❛   Aye, share the blankets ! ❜ ❛   love is an action word, prove it to me. ❜

❛   ready or not here I come ! ❜

❛   Ah! I scared you didn’t I ?❜ ❛   I know you love me -  ❜ ❛   These flowers match your eyes. ❜ ❛   I’m gonna catch you !❜ ❛   We should carve our name in this tree. ❜ ❛   Every moment with you is special  ❜ ❛   Hold on tight ! ❜ ❛   Give me a kiss for good luck - ❜ ❛   think about me. ❜

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

“ what’re you doing?! no! stop! ”

Bad dog cat? 

“Wakey wakey, Kaden,” Keaton purred, giving the kitsune another “gentle” punch to the gut. “It’s time for our treasure hunt! C’mon, you promised you’d go with me to look for treasure today, so get up! If you don’t, I’ll transform and sling you over my shoulder!”

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

Symbol Starters~

Send ☔ for our muses to share an umbrella on a rainy day.

Send 📱 for my muse to send yours a random text.

Send 📞 for my muse to call yours.

Send ✞ for our muses to meet in an empty church.

Send ⚔ to challenge my muse to a duel.

Send 😢 for my muse to comfort you.

Send 🌸 to receive flowers from my muse.

Send ☁ for our muses to watch the clouds together.

Send ⌚ to ask my muse what time it is.

Send ℃ for my muse to discuss the temperature with yours.

Send 👻 to tell ghost stories with my muse.

Send 🐩 to play with my muse’s pet (or have my muse play with yours).

Send 😘 to see my muse’s reaction to yours flirting with them.

Send 💅 to do my muse’s nails.

Send 🐎 for our muses to go horse riding together.

Send 📺 for our muses to have a TV/movie night.

Send 🍸 for our muses to have a drink together.

Send 💪 for our muses to workout together.

Send 💤 to wake my muse up from their nap.

Send 🍔 for our muses to have lunch together.

Send 💢 for my muse to get mad at yours for something they did.

Send 😓 for my muse to apologize to yours for something they did.

Send 💖 for my muse to tell yours who they currently have a crush on.

Send 💘 for my muse to ask yours who they have a crush on.

Send 💋 to randomly kiss my muse.

Send 🎃 to carve pumpkins with my muse.

Send 🎁 for my muse to give yours a gift.

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

Let it be known that I was this close to posting that

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

“ what the actual fuck are you doing? ”

Bad dog cat?

“I found this cool dead rabbit, and if I roll in it, I’ll pick up its great smell! Wanna join me?”

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

small-time-village:

While Mozu was glad that he was enjoying the bacon - she had prepared it all, from the slaughtering to the slicing - his train of thought was more than a little hard to follow. She just stared at him with utter confusion on her face.

“Um, Keaton,” she began awkwardly. “I d-don’t mean to be rude, but… what in Yato’s name? Eating a knife will actually kill you. It will rip apart your digestive tracts as easily as I cut up this boar. It will definitely not weaken the knife.”

Fresh meat certainly was the best, and Keaton couldn’t deny it. While bacon wasn’t quite fresh, the flavor was still exquisite. He could tell it was fairly recent from the taste and the smell, and he savored both. Mozu had outdone herself this time.

“Uh, yes it will?” Keaton scoffed. “You can’t attack people with a knife that’s in pieces, and you chew things into pieces before you swallow. Or do humans eat weird, too?”

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

things i’ve said to my cat

“ ow! why’d you bite me for? ” “ what the actual fuck are you doing? ” “ don’t. just. don’t. ” “ if you don’t calm down, i swear to GOD, i’ll – ” “ please just leave me alone for five minutes. ” “ don’t you dare knock that off. ” “ i’m trying to sleeeeep, please sttoooooppp… ” “ i love you so much… even if you are satan. ” “ what’re you doing?! no! stop! ” “ what are you? a stunt master? ”

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

small-time-village:

Mozu holds out a plate piled high with strips of bacon. They are raw, but she really doubts the wolfskin minds that.

“K-Keaton, no, that’s not… You know that knives are what people use to try and stab you? Why would you eat them?”

As soon as the plate was in front of him, Keaton had snatched a few pieces and crammed them into his mouth. There was no hiding the way his tail wagged as he got his first taste of bacon, especially when he sat down next to Mozu and started whacking her ankles with his tail by accident.

“Well,” Keaton explained, not even bothering to swallow first. “I heard Leo saying something about words and ‘taking away their power’ or something, and I thought to myself ‘what’s more dangerous than words?’ Knives are, by the way. Knives are more dangerous. So I don’t know how he took power away from knives, but I figured eating it could do the trick.”

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

diavoleste replied to your post: I have never seen anyone so happy to pretend to be...

I DO NOT SMELL LIKE A REEKING BODY YOU MUTT

“I didn’t say that! I said you smell like a dead body. I didn’t say how strong it was. You don’t reek. You just smell dead to me. It’s faint. You even learned how to make your heart beat too soft for me to hear it, so that’s an accomplishment.”

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

littlewerewxlf replied to your post: small-time-village: @the-biggest-blackest-wolf ...

Teaching your daughter all the bad things

“Well I saw everyone chewing on these tiny brushes and saying it’s good for their teeth, but when I tried it, they yelled something like ‘that’s for cleaning poop out of the toilet’ at me, which didn’t make sense at all. Why would you put something in your mouth if you don’t want it in your mouth? So I just figured, hey, metal probably works just as well, but apparently that gets you yelled at too. So I guess the lesson here is that humans don’t make sense.”

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

I have never seen anyone so happy to pretend to be dead before.

BAD DOG 

“Isn’t that what you do all the time? I mean you look and smell like a dead body to me.”

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

“I’m not gonna say no to bacon, but what’s so wrong with chewing on metal? It’s good for my teeth, you know!”

@the-biggest-blackest-wolf

“Keaton! No! Knives are not for eating! H-here, just have some bacon!”

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

I asked you to bring me my slippers. I did not ask you to check they were dead by shaking them like a crazed dingo before giving them to me.

BAD DOG 

“Hey, you should be grateful! Have you ever been bitten by a slipper before? I haven’t, but it probably hurts! You guys go around shoving your feet in them like nothing bad would happen, but when I look out for you for once, it’s ‘bad dog’ this, and ‘keaton don’t pee on nohrian nobles’ that!”

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

"I have never seen anyone so happy to pretend to be dead before." - Hana

BAD DOG

“Playing dead is fun! You get to take a little rest on your back, smell all the cool smells on the ground, and people generally scratch you behind the ears afterwards. What’s not to love?”

[the-biggest-blackest-wolf-blog]

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU EATING?

BAD DOG

“A knife!”