the-main-characterr

[the-main-characterr]

We write the day 16th of April,

they told me it would be a special day, i just expected a different kind

this isnt a journal nor a novel

more a letter to remind

to stop living in indocile

you must have wondered why i always smiled when i got to see you

until that smile disappeared forever

you never knew why it flew

and i never knew why i hated your heather

maybe another day, another time,

i‘ll be your first choice

no shivers dwn my spine

no cracks in my voice

and much like 2 sides of a coin,

forged together

but never able to face each other

you and me were meant to be a never

I knew this was coming

i just hoped i would be wrong

because loving you was numbing

and the days without you felt so long

it would be a lie if i say i didnt know from the start

but denial was easier than living apart

[the-main-characterr]

i thought my love for u is immortal.

i was convinced that the person i’ve loved continuously even along others will always have a place in my heart. that even tho we won’t end up together, we’ll play an important role in each other’s life.

what a silly silly meryem you are.

i wish it wasn’t true but i don’t like you anymore.

and i know you’re confused

[the-main-characterr]

wtf happened between the 22nd and the 25th

[the-main-characterr]

meryem. i like how u evolved. you’ve been a bitch the past few years and i’m sure, 3 years later from today, you’ll say “ew i was a bitch in 2022”

but in comparison, your statistic look good and i’m super super proud of u. the way u manage emotions the way u manage relationships with people, you’ve evolved and i know you for sure aren’t perfect but you’ve realised that being perfect isn’t the goal. it’s not what u wanna reach and you’re so amazing for finding the strings of things u enjoy.

love you so much.

you’ll b alright :)

[the-main-characterr]

i shouldn’t be missing you

[the-main-characterr]

fucking idiot

[the-main-characterr]

i like how your glasses lift when you smile

[the-main-characterr]

i hope i will see you later, alligator.

[the-main-characterr]

once upon a time, i couldn’t stand this picture

[the-main-characterr]

i now am the happiest i ever been

broke all the old bonds

new meryem.

better me.

im proud of you :)

[the-main-characterr]

i was there.

[the-main-characterr]

i just can’t believe i’ll never find any answers.

i’m over it i’m living the biggest love story of my life. i’m living the love story i forgot i had. the love story i thought was over.

but i want answers. how and why

i wanna know.

[the-main-characterr]

slowly watching u become not even a memory anymore

i don’t want to forget you.

but it’s the best for me n that’s all that really matters

[the-main-characterr]

yo wtf actually happened i’d love to know

[the-main-characterr]

du hurensohn

[the-main-characterr]

whys everyone i somehow come close to depressed

I DONT WANNA FIX ANYONE

[the-main-characterr]

you scare the shit out of me