the-vibes-arent-right

[the-vibes-arent-right]

a quick psa to anyone recently getting into greek mythology and is a victim of tumblr and/or tiktok misconceptions:

-there is no shame in being introduced to mytholgy from something like percy jackson, epic the musical or anything like that, but keep in mind that actual myths are going to be VERY different from modern retellings

-the myth of medusa you probably know (her being a victim of poseidon and being cursed by athena) isn't 100% accurate to GREEK mythology (look up ovid)

-there is no version of persephone's abduction in which persephone willingly stays with hades, that's a tumblr invention (look up homeric hymn to demeter)

-as much as i would like it, no, cerberus' name does not mean "spot" (probably a misunderstanding from this wikipedia article)

-zeus isn't the only god who does terrible things to women, your fav male god probably has done the same

-on that note, your fav greek hero has probably done some heinous shit as well

-gods are more complicated than simply being "god of [insert thing]", many titles overlap between gods and some may even change depending on where they were worshipped

-also, apollo and artemis being the gods of the sun and the moon isn't 100% accurate, their main aspects as deities originally were music and the hunt

-titans and gods aren't two wholly different concepts, titan is just the word used to decribe the generation of gods before the olympians

-hector isn't the villain some people make him out to be

-hephaestus WAS married to aphrodite. they divorced. yes, divorce was a thing in ancient greece. hephaestus' wife is aglaia

-ancient greek society didn't have the same concepts of sexuality that we have now, it's incorrect to describe virgin goddesses like artemis and athena as lesbians, BUT it's also not wholly accurate to describe them as aromantic/asexual, it's more complex than that

-you can never fully understand certain myths if you don't understand the societal context in which they were told

-myths have lots and lots of retellings, there isn't one singular "canon", but we can try to distinguish between older and newer versions and bewteen greek and roman versions

-most of what you know about sparta is probably incorrect

-reading/waching retellings is not a substitute to reading the original myths, read the iliad! read the odyssey! i know they may seem intimidating, but they're much more entertaining than you may think

greek mythology is so complex and interesting, don't go into it with preconcieved notions! try to be open to learn!

[the-vibes-arent-right]

Admitting my star sign was a mistake.

[the-vibes-arent-right]

Merlin is on bed rest and unavailable to work so George has to step in for a few weeks

“George, where are my socks?”

“They’re in the sockdrawer sire, next to your smallclothes — here, i’ll grab them for you”

“But why are they there??”

“Because…that’s where the socks belong?”

“But Merlin always kept my socks in the basket next to the wardrobe”

“Why would he do that? that makes no sense?”

“Huh…no idea… but I prefer it that way, so dump the socks into the basket and leave the drawer empty”

🧺🧺🧺🧺🧺🧺

“Your breakfast is on the table sire, i’ve pressed your formal robe so it’s ready for petitions in the afternoon, and your ceremonial circlet is polished for you”

“Why are you standing over there? aren’t you gonna drag me out of the bed feet first?”

“Your majesty!? why on earth would I do such a thing?!”

“It’s just…that’s usually how merlin wakes me up — nevermind, hand me that apple”

🍏🍏🍏🍏🍏🍏

“I’ve packed your saddlebags for the hunting trip, my lord”

“Good, It’s going to be a great day for fishing”

“Fishing sire? I’m afraid I haven’t packed anything for a fishing trip, forgive me sire, I had no idea your plans had changed”

“Oh right, you wouldn’t know. Merlin hates hunting, so we always fish, but we still call it a hunting trip so that others won’t ask any questions”

“I see, sire (he didn’t) but are you still going fishing now that Merlin is on bedrest and unable to join?”

“Ah…I hadn’t thought of that. Perhaps you would join me?”

“I …thank you sire, but my chores…”

“Of course, you’re right. I’ll ask Sir Percival if he will join me instead”

🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟

“My lord, might I help you with — that?”

“Ah no thanks George, I’ve got it”

“Right of course sire. Might I ask, no forgive me, its not my place to question his majesty”

“No no, go ahead, just ask”

“What…or I guess, why are you…dusting under the bed?”

“Merlin gets terribly sneezy when it’s dusty, so I always make sure it doesn’t get too dusty in here, otherwise I’ll never hear the end of it, ahaha”

“But why isn’t Merlin, your manservant, dusting under the bed himself?”

“Oh he hates dusting”

🧹🧹🧹🧹🧹🧹🧹

[the-vibes-arent-right]

"You're losing blood" no I know exactly where it is. The floor. Don't ever underestimate me.

[the-vibes-arent-right]

Merlin was legit cleaning Arthur's chambers like this...

this man seriously had unparalleled job security i swear to god

[the-vibes-arent-right]

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Sorry your boyfriend died and came back and died and came back and died and came back and died and came back again. He was trying to find you.

[the-vibes-arent-right]

gonna post my entire stickman reaction pic collection

[the-vibes-arent-right]

oh you’re a fan of my blog? name five of my worst opinions

[the-vibes-arent-right]

The art history version of “you’d look prettier if you smiled more”

[the-vibes-arent-right]

seeing a lot of people suggest that healthcare CEOs should go into hiding or employ more private security and i could not possibly disagree more. you can't live the rest of your life in fear. i think it's imperative that they get back to work, in person at least 3 days a week at the headquarters address listed on their company's website.

[the-vibes-arent-right]

Best RPF Ship - FINAL!

[the-vibes-arent-right]

shout out to the literal fan fiction happening a few blocks from my apartment. there has been this halal meat market on the corner for like 19 years that the owner’s son just inherited and directly across the street this woman opened a kosher grocery store and since day one they’ve had this very friendly fake rivalry, playing it up for the customers, it’s always been super goofy and light hearted. so turns out last night she proposed in the middle of the afternoon rush in the meat market and he said YES and she’s moving her store to the adjacent empty storefront on the left so they can have a JOINT GROCERY STORE it is so fucking cute I wish them the happiest marriage ever

[the-vibes-arent-right]

[the-vibes-arent-right]

A master to his action-hero trainee says, "Your movements are sloppy. You lack awareness of your body when you fight. Your hands move and yet you do not hold them in your mind's eye. Come. We will remedy this."

And then the master paints his trainee's fingernails and orders the trainee to complete a series of complicated tasks without smudging the nail polish.

[the-vibes-arent-right]

T. J. Eckleburg

(cover free version on my profile!!)

[the-vibes-arent-right]

This too shall pass but like holy fuck